Wishfull-star: Thank you! Lot's of stuff happens in the chapters to come. Lots of fluff and drama!
sairakanzaki: I have successfully turned Izo into another Kingdew in this. I'm sorry Izo, usually I write you so nice!
A dash of feels in this one, and surprises! Enjoy~
The Spades sighed, but not in relief or happiness. It would be a long time sailing with them. They all had to try and get along. But Ace knew they wouldn't tolerate anybody treating him wrong. They'd seen what it had done to Ace the first time. He was their captain, but the protecting went both ways, whether Ace liked that or not.
They left the island immediately. The beach was the last place he could be himself at. He silently said goodbye and a thanks. Ace was sitting at the railing, his legs dangling through the gaps in the railings. Thatch sat next to him, but Ace didn't look. "You okay?" the head chef asked quietly. Ace shrugged one shoulder. He was as okay as he could be. "This time will be different."
Ace sighed, and said he hoped he was right. He looked out at the ocean, sad that he would have to hide venturing out in it. "I wish I didn't have to hide going swimming," Ace said quietly. "Last time, the night Izo knew I was gone and was waiting for me to corner me, I couldn't get back up. So I had to do this whole roundabout plan just to get inside."
Thatch asked what it had been. "I swam down and caught a shark and swam back up with it, dragging the smell of blood, luring a sea king. I put the shark a bit away from one side of the ship, where it surfaced loudly to eat it. I climbed up the opposite side and ran inside."
Thatch was gaping. Ace frowned, wishing he hadn't said a thing. Luring a sea king to the ship wasn't exactly a good thing to do. "That was hella smart," Thatch said with a laugh. "Izo is nosy, but I think he learned his lesson with you," he said sadly.
Ace didn't want to turn around and see the glares. Continue the hell that was only the last week or so. He couldn't do it for months. He just couldn't. It would be easier for the Spades to get one of the smaller boats and Ace would just drag them to the next island, maybe the Whitebeards would just give them the money for a ship.
But that would involve explaining how they'd get to the next island in a small boat in the New World. "You're acting differently now," Thatch said. "Why?" Ace didn't feel the question was meant to be disrespectful. He was quiet for a moment, trying to come up with a satisfactory answer.
"I won't be getting off of this ship and going home. Home is gone forever. I don't want to be hated the whole time. Last time it fuckin' sucked," Ace explained. Thatch turned around, but Ace didn't. He just continued to look at the endless ocean. He wondered if being out on the sea was a wish also partly because he was a sea dragon. Maybe the ocean just called to him. He would be able to go into it anytime he wanted.
He didn't have to venture out of the forest and to the only secluded beach on the island. He could just jump over the side and go on a swim. That's how it had been since he set off from the beginning. Now, he had to be careful and make plans to go on swims. It was definitely not ideal.
"I really do think this time will be different. But I won't try to convince you. I guess we'll just have to see if Marco and I are right, and that everyone finally pulled their heads out of their asses. What? I can criticize my brothers harshly if they deserve it. Even Pops got really angry at them. I was sure glad to not be on the receiving end of that look he gave.
"He was so pissed and upset about how and why you left. So angry at everybody for treating you so badly," Thatch explained. Ace wanted to change the subject, so he did, he asked why nobody had noticed Teach was rotten. Not just his appearance. The chef sighed, looking sad. Ace regretted his blunt words. Teach had been family to him, but he tried to kill him. Thatch shouldn't like him anymore. It didn't make sense.
Ace waited for an answer. It wasn't right for him to take time to answer questions and then get impatient with another doing the same. At least, people who were patient enough for Ace to return the favor to them.
"Nobody knew. It's shameful. Nobody. Knew. He confessed almost the moment he was apprehended, his arm mangled badly from the powerful throw. Pretty embarrassing, going down from a dodgeball.
"Anyways, he apparently was only on this crew for the dark-dark fruit. And I'm so happy I ate it immediately. That would have been really bad in his hands!" Ace frowned at him. He awkwardly said he was sorry they had a traitor aboard. He was trying so hard to be polite. He wanted to be accepted this time. He didn't want the glares. He wouldn't be the threatening side of himself. He would do his best to act like a normal human.
Thatch looked down, frowning deeply suddenly. "I just want to thank you, for telling us the first time and then the whole saving-my-life thing," he said sincerely. He leaned to the side and put his head on Ace's shoulder. Ace stiffened, and Thatch asked if this was okay. He knew Ace didn't like being touched, so he wondered if normal things like this were okay.
"I… I guess? I don't want other people touching me, though. People I don't like. I guess this is okay. Anyone else does it and I won't be so cool with it… So, have people caught on about me having growled at Teach? And then that he did this - tried to do it?" Ace asked. It was weird having Thatch doing this.
Well, he did it to Deuce sometimes and Luffy always had done it to him. He guessed it was just a way to tell someone that they feel vulnerable without saying it. Ace might understand it, but didn't want anyone he didn't like or know well doing it. They'd get a shove away at best and attacked at worst.
Thatch answered, "Yeah. The commanders especially. The growl was mostly heard at the commanders' table. That itself changed things. You look just like a teenager. I think they didn't take you seriously first. But then this and your previous reaction showed you weren't just volatile or anything. Not violent or brutish. I'm not trying to insult you, I promise!" he said when he saw Ace's face getting red.
He gave a jerking nod. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to word it like that." Ace was glad he was no longer leaning on his shoulder. He felt better with him not doing that. He knew Thatch for, what, like a week? Ace may have decided he liked him and would be friendly, but he wasn't special to him. Ace could leave and never look back. He wouldn't miss anyone here.
Maybe it was heartless, but when he left, he didn't feel an ounce of regret, didn't miss either of them. He was glad to be gone, leaving everybody. "Can you finish your point?" Ace asked. Thatch had just totally insulted him and wouldn't finish his thought. Ace was offended, he couldn't help it. It was very disrespectful. He wanted to leave, get up and go somewhere else.
"We-well, I just mean that they know you're serious. Not a reckless and foolish rookie."
But Ace was foolish. He'd fought and lost to Whitebeard like a chump. He didn't say it out loud. Thatch already offended him enough, he wouldn't do it to himself. Ace nodded once and then got up and left. He was still part dragon. It was a miracle Ace hadn't snapped at Thatch. So, they all thought he was just some violent and brutish idiot out to get himself killed. He heard Thatch apologize, but Ace didn't turn around. He went to their room. And he ignored everyone he passed.
He went into the bedroom and slammed the door shut. He flopped onto the bed he'd been using on the ship, and put his face in his pillow. There was a knock on the door, and he could smell it was Deuce. "C'm in," he called. Deuce walked in and sat on the mattress on the floor that he had been using. "You okay? I couldn't help but overhear Thatch being an idiot."
Ace scowled. "I know he was just trying to be honest, but he still called me a bunch of degrading things. Brutish, reckless, stupid-"
"He never said stupid," Deuce said. Ace pointed out that "not taking him seriously" had to mean they thought he was stupid. "But Thatch didn't think any of that. We knew everyone else doesn- didn't like you." Ace huffed and turned away.
"I'm trying, okay? I let Thatch lean on my shoulder. I didn't like it, but I let him! I don't want them all getting comfortable and touchy feely with me. They made me miserable," he spat out. "I want every single one of them to apologize to me and then bow and show respect." Deuce said that probably wasn't going to happen. "Whitebeard did it!"
Deuce said he was weird. And smart. "He figured it out easily, and accepted it. He's weird and smart. I don't think you should expect the same from everybody else." Ace started to say that they should. "They won't, Ace. You cannot expect anything from all of them like from what Whitebeard did. Don't expect them to get you, to treat you how you think you should be."
Ace looked hurt. "I think I should be?"
Deuce nodded. "They don't know, Ace. So you can't expect them to bow to you. Friends don't even bow to each other. Did Luffy and Sabo ever bow to you?" Ace shook his head. "Do we ever bow to you?" He shook his head again. "But do you get respect from us? You're still our friend and captain."
"It's different. You all know. They don't and I won't let them, but-" Deuce nodded, asking if he realized the problem. "Don't act like I'm stupid."
"I'm your best friend, I can call or think you're stupid if I want." Ace shoved his shoulder, but not in anger. "What's the problem?" Ace huffed and looked away.
He grumbled, "I can't expect them to treat me like a dragon if they don't know." Deuce nodded. "But still! I hate being disrespected." Deuce said they might come to the conclusion that he was a conceited brat. "You're really not making me feel good, Deuce." The first mate seemed to just see the look on Ace's face. "I can't have you think I'm stupid, too."
He looked completely ashamed. "I'm sorry, Ace. That was totally uncalled for. I didn't mean all of that, that's not my opinion. I'm just saying that the Whitebeards might feel that way." Ace pulled his legs to his chest, hunching his back. What Deuce said really hurt. Because he recognized that Ace came off that way.
"I can't do anything right. It's my fault the PoS is gone. It's my fault, both times we've been trapped here."
Deuce said, "That's not your fau-"
"I'm the captain, Deuce! The safety of my crew and our ship falls on my shoulders. And look where we are! Cause I wanted to fight Whitebeard and I lost. I passed out and you guys were beat up! It's all my fault!" Ace shouted. Deuce was shocked. "Please, go away."
"No," Deuce said. Ace glared at him. He told him to go away again, he was serious about it. "No, I'm not gonna let you just stay in here and drown in depression and self-hatred. Never again." Ace knew he was referencing. "You're not caged here. You can go off on your own if you have a plan, you're not a prisoner."
Ace said, "To you, maybe. I feel completely caged. If I make another wrong step, some other Izo will figure out something weird and then everything will happen again, but this time, there's nowhere to go back to! Home is gone!" The crew didn't know how fucking important the Piece of Spadile was to him. It was his first accomplishment. He got his own home. A real home, not the bandit's hut, not a cold treehouse. That ship was his haven. He could be himself there, he had friends there.
In a world that would hunt and persecute him, that ship was the safest place in the world for him. And he'd never know why it was taken from him. Would never get revenge. "You guys don't get it. It was a ship and a home for you, but it was different for me. In a world that would think I'm some freak, dangerous, unnatural, wrong, that place was my safe space. I could be myself, without risk of being discovered.
"I could be happy, I didn't have to hide anything. I wasn't afraid there! You think I'm not scared of meeting new people? That they won't figure it out and then betray me? Report it to the government and then send hunters and bounty hunters at me? There's nobody like me. You're my best friend, but you could never understand. Nobody can." Deuce had tears in his eyes listening to Ace admitting all of the things he tried to keep hidden. To stay strong.
He was supposed to be the captain. He was the pillar of support for his crew. Now he wasn't even their captain. They were on Whitebeard's ship, not his. "But, nobody will go after you if they don't know. You're good at hiding it, you never lose control and shift."
Ace growled in frustration. He finally stood up and pulled his shorts leg up, revealing the thing he'd kept hidden for many years. "It gets bigger every year. Someday, my whole human body will be covered by it and I'll never, ever have a normal life. My time is limited and I didn't want to spend it here!"
The dark bluish green scales that covered his left upper thigh. The marks on the other side were slower at growing. He'd kept it hidden from everybody. Why he didn't take his shorts off around other people, why he didn't bathe with them. Deuce looked shocked and then hurt. He asked why Ace hadn't told him. "Because there was no point in worrying you," Ace said, letting go of the short leg so it could fall back down. He laid down and faced the wall. "Go away."
Finally, Deuce left. Ace curled into a ball and cried into the pillow, hating his weakness.
-x-
"I think I fucked up," Thatch said to Marco suddenly. Marco groaned and asked what it was this time. "I hurt Ace's feelings and he stormed off. And I heard him shouting in his room." Marco asked what he'd said. "I sort of told him everyone didn't take him seriously and thought he was violent and brutish." Marco demanded to know why he'd said that. "It was an accident! I was trying to tell him that everyone thought better of him than before but it came out all wrong. I totally offended him, his face was bright red."
Marco sat down and sighed. They were not one of the storage rooms Marco was surveying to make into a new bedroom. His was fixed by then. But seven people sharing one room was more than the four to a room in most of the bedrooms that weren't for commanders. They wanted to make the Spades comfortable there.
"Ace has more issues than we can see and observe. He doesn't trust easily because he can't," Marco said. Thatch said he knew that already. "He doesn't trust because it's dangerous. Think of him as the rarest mermaid ever. Can you imagine how much he would be coveted if the world found out?" Marco asked.
Thatch deflated. "I hadn't thought about it like that. I just thought it was because of his pride and all. But now it's easy to see… Does he think we'll turn him in? No one would ever do that here!" Marco sighed.
"We just had a betrayal, Thatch. One of our own tried to kill you. Your supposed brother. Ace is a newby, not even part of the crew. Do you think everyone would protest or try to protect him from the world?" Marco hissed, not wanting to risk being overheard. Thatch looked horrified with the realization. "I don't think he'll ever trust us like he might have before Teach."
"But he already knew he was bad!"
"And nobody else noticed. There are 1,600 of us. There has to be more rotten ones, even if they aren't traitors. Our crew isn't all loving, great people. You know that. None of us were supposed to be evil," Marco sighed. Thatch had completely deflated with the truths Marco pointed out. He asked, then, how they were supposed to make Ace stay. "Remember, it's not our goal to coerce him to stay. We're taking them to get a new ship. This may be a second chance, but to make us likable, not to try to force him to stay again."
Deuce went walking past the door, wiping his eyes. Marco hurried out of the room. "Deuce? Are you okay?" Deuce nodded, but didn't turn around and didn't stop. Thatch and Marco shared a look before heading to the commanders' hall, just checking to see if Ace was okay. They didn't hear anything but quiet whimpering and swear words.
"Are you okay, Ace?" Marco asked, getting a bad feeling. He could smell blood. Was Ace hurting himself? Had he hurt himself on accident? Why did Deuce run away? Ace didn't reply. Marco gripped the handle and opened it. The door wasn't locked. He opened it slowly and gasped when he saw the room.
There was blood all over the bed around Ace. He ran to the bed. Ace had spikes coming out of his back. "S-Sorry, i-t was an accident." Ace mumbled. He clenched his eyes shut and the spikes receded and his skin healed over just fine. But the blood was still everywhere.
"Wh-what happened?" Thatch demanded.
"I'm too dry. I'm fine. Oh god, the room," Ace said and buried his face in his pillow. Marco didn't touch him, and sent Thatch a warning look to not touch him. Marco asked what had happened. Ace looked like he wasn't going to say anything, but Marco wasn't going to leave without an explanation. "Do you want me to get Deuce?" he asked.
Ace shook his head. "My body tried shifting for… some reason. But I'm not in water at all. Thank god nothing happened," Ace sighed and sat up. He didn't look to be in any pain. Thatch asked if he was unable to shift out of water. "Yeah… just, some part of me has to be in water." He immediately looked like he regretted saying it.
"Ah, then I guess it's a good thing you can't shift on land? You would have destroyed the ship," Thatch said awkwardly. "Um, I'm gonna go get cleaning supplies. And new sheets," he announced and left.
Marco asked if this had ever happened before. Ace shook his head. "Don't worry about this happening again, okay? Don't tell anybody." Marco didn't like this. Didn't like hiding anything so big from Pops. But, Ace deserved privacy if he wanted or needed it. Marco said he wouldn't tell anybody.
Thatch came back and the three of them cleaned up the room. Ace was slightly rocking back and forth, a blanket around his shoulders, after the blood was cleaned up, the stained sheets and towels burned to leave no evidence. By the end, the room looked perfectly fine. Ace stood up and said he had to go see Deuce.
Marco nodded, holding the bucket of bloody water. He trusted Ace that this wouldn't happen again. Something had caused him to lose control, make Deuce cry. It had to be before Ace's back exploded because Deuce would never leave him in that state. Thatch looked sad and asked, "Do you think it was because of what I said?"
Marco said he didn't know. They dumped the bloody water into the sink, since their room had a shared bathroom since it was originally a commander's room. They rinsed out the bucket and mop and then brought them to the closet they came from. Marco headed out on deck, seeing Pops reading the newspaper.
He said he wouldn't tell anybody, and he wouldn't. He saw Ace and Deuce walk inside, Ace looking very worried. Of course he was, he just had spikes rip out of his back! Blood sprayed everywhere! Marco wanted to go ask how he was, but reminded himself that he wasn't Ace's crew, he wasn't one that he picked.
All of the Spades were hand picked by Ace. He knew what he wanted and who he would get it from. That way of thinking sounded heartless. He just had a good eye for people and relied on that for making friends.
And Marco was sure losing their ship had impacted Ace more than the others. The other six pirates seemed to be back to normal. A bit sad, but acting how they did before. Ace was a different person. He was like a bunch of sharp angles before, and now he's not soft angles, he's just flat. Losing that ship was hardest for him.
And Marco could understand why he was upset, of course. But for someone like him, only him, losing a safe haven was like losing a part of yourself. He wished he could get to know Ace better without seeming pushy. He felt that one thing was the same. As Deuce had said that first day, Ace isn't his friend, he's Ace's.
He looked around, loving his brothers, who were goofing off and messing with each other. But he was also angry at them. Angry at himself for treating Ace not even like a human. A normal human. How, all these years, had they not gotten somebody like Ace? Who did everything possible to leave, get away.
Had any of their brothers, even when first recruited, been treated as Ace had been? Pops saw him looking puzzled, and stood up and walked to him and asked if he was alright. "Yeah. Just thinking about Ace's situation."
"I have been, as well. I'd like to speak with him and you, only you two. Can you get him?" Whitebeard asked.
Marco replied, "I don't think right now is a good time." Pops was surprised and asked if something had happened. "Yeah, but he asked me not to tell anybody." The captain nodded. They valued personal information. Meaning nobody knows something about someone unless they want that. Privacy was a big issue on a ship so large with so many people. So, Whitebeard didn't ask for any details. "Tell me when things look to be better?"
"Yeah."
Marco saw Ace gather his crew and go inside, no doubt to their room to talk. He wished he was close enough to Ace to know what he was thinking, what he wanted. But of course he didn't follow or eavesdrop. It wasn't his business, even if he was really curious.
"Marco, I'd like to talk to you," Namur said. Marco said, "of course", wondering what the problem was. Namur looked worried, uncomfortable. Marco really hoped it didn't have anything to do with Ace. They went to the meeting room and closed the door behind them. Marco sat in his seat and the fishman sat across from him.
"When are you planning on telling everybody that Ace isn't fully human?" Namur asked seriously. Marco asked what he meant. "There's no way you don't know. Why can he swim? Izo said he was sure Ace could swim and was leaving the ship. If that's true, then something is up since he has a devil fruit that should make it impossible for him to swim."
Marco didn't know what to say, what to do. "Have you told anyone this theory?" Namur shook his head.
He said, "I've been leaning on one. Ace is quite prideful and has a temper. Like dragons." Marco said that humans and dragons can't mate. "Well, obviously. And you're not denying it. I understand if you don't want to tell anyone. I know privacy is a must, not a privilege. But is he safe for us to all be around?"
"I can't give you any information. As someone who wants to be close to Ace and also a good person, I'm not going to say anything to anybody. And he has control over himself." Then the image of Ace in a puddle of blood flitted through his mind. He hadn't hurt anybody with that, and said it was impossible for him to shift fully when not in water. "You can't say anything to anybody."
Namur replied, "I wasn't planning to. I just don't know if its a good idea to keep him here." Marco asked where they were supposed to put them. Their ship was gone. They had no home. So they would be staying with them for now, if not permanently. "If you say it's safe, and if Pops thinks so, too, then I trust it. But is it a good idea to hide it from the other commanders? Shouldn't they know?"
"No. They shouldn't know. Their reaction before was terrible. Knowing why he was like that might make things so much worse." He looked pointedly at Namur, who'd had a pretty hard time from the crew about him being a fishman and joining. Then more of an uproar when Pops named him a commander. The animosity had faded, but Marco knew Namur would never forget the racism displayed. But he was strong and had powered through it without saying a word back.
He was welcome now, but it had been a rocky start that he persevered. But he wasn't a teenage boy. He'd been in his thirties when he was named commander and joined in his late twenties. There was no comparison between the fishman's situation and the half-dragon's. "Make sure you don't tell anybody, not even a hint, okay?"
"I swear. But I hope the three of you are right. I understand that he saved Thatch, and I'm eternally grateful for that, but I can't help but worry a bit about the recklessness of keeping him here." Marco's face turned into one of disapproving.
"He's a human, too, Namur. He should be treated like one," the first division commander said firmly. Namu backed off and nodded, sensing Marco's irritation. The fishman once again said he wouldn't tell anybody and left the room. Marco sighed and rested his head on the table. Things kept getting more complicated.
And was Ace actually okay after losing all that blood? He looked perfectly fine. But he remembered how fast his cuts had healed. For some reason, nobody had said a thing about them. Maybe it was because he was a logia. Maybe Thatch could heal like that, too. But Marco was betting on it being Ace's dragon side.
He went to get something to eat and saw when Ace walked into the galley with his crew, who were all looking haunted. Ace probably explained what had happened. It was just good the evidence had been gone by the time they went to the room and Ace spoke to them after it. Ace's expression was closed, and when he saw Marco, he looked away.
Marco looked at his food, wishing Ace could be happy and himself. Not just on this ship, but everywhere. On this ship would be nice and helpful. His fists balled and he clenched his teeth. He wanted Ace happy. He'd do what he could to make that possible. Make it happen for real. Make him happy and comfortable enough to play dodgeball with the Whitebeards.
Comfortable to get drunk around them. Maybe not comfortable enough to reveal himself to everybody, though that would be amazing. But he wanted him to not be miserable the next month or longer. Most likely, longer. Three islands before somewhere they could buy a new ship.
Plenty of time for things to get better, but also plenty of times for it to get worse.