Nothing Really Change, Does it?
Most of the time Draco was confused. And tired, exhausted through and through. But he couldn't do anything about it, not really.
Only good thing was that his relationship with Harry started to shift back as it used to be.
They would spend time together in Remus' chambers, reading comics and eating whatever sweets Sirius had sent them.
One step at the time, they walked to being really good friends. Only thing that bothered Draco was the almost silence that he got from Alec, a lot of times he wouldn't reply to Draco's messages at all and these times when he does, it's mostly short and without any real emotions.
Draco tried to hold it all together, not show how much this loss affected him but he still struggled to remember to eat at least three times a day and he still sported dark circles under his eyes that seem to be even lighter than usual, lacking their spark.
But at least Harry was there, holding his hand randomly, playing with Draco's hair when they were sitting leaning against each other.
Draco was looking forward to their Hogsmeade visit, not being able to wait to meet Alec. He was physically aching to hug him and press his cold nose against the warmth of Alec's neck.
His excitement was ruined that very morning when an owl dropped him a small scroll of message.
Draco ignored his other post and opened the small scroll, having a feeling that it was from Alec and yes, it really was Alec writing to him.
But the spur of joy he felt by seeing the familiar writing was soon turned into ice flooding through his veins.
Can't go. Have a game.
A.
Draco stared at the small note for longer than necessary, unshed tears burning his eyes.
Blaise was saying something but Draco couldn't hear him.
Alec wasn't coming to meet Draco.
But it was okay, it was. Wasn't it?
He simply had a game that weekend, so of course he couldn't come, how could he?
Draco just needed to calm down.
And breath.
Draco sucks in a deep breath, his lungs protesting a bit, once again he has forgotten to breath.
He thought that he and Alec had worked past that issue a long while back but it seems that now it was back in full force.
Draco slowly pulled up his other letter and stood up, walking out of the great hall and down to his room.
He walked without really seeing or hearing anything, not even stopping.
He simply crawled into his bed, pulling the curtains tightly shut and buried his face into a pillow, sliding his hand under the pillow and feeling the sweater hunched there, pulling it out and taking a deep breath, breathing in the faint scent of Alec, letting the stray tears run free and wet the soft sweater.
Couple days later Harry catched up with Draco before breakfast.
- Hey, do you have any plans for today? - Harry asked cheerfully, fidgeting with the bottom of his sweater.
- No, not really. Why? - Draco couldn't wait to take a sip of hot tea that was waiting for him on the table.
- Do ya wanna come to the Hogsmeade with me? - Harry blurted out, finally looking Draco in the eyes, his green ones shining with hope.
- Sure, why not. It would be good to go out. Also it seems like good weather outside. - Draco shrugged, turning to go to the Slytherin table.
- Meet me after breakfast by the front staircase, k? - Harry was now grinning like an idiot, Draco just nodded and finally sat down and wrapped his hands around his oh so warm tea cup, taking a small sip and letting his eyes close.
Draco managed to eat a bit, Dobby made sure to get Draco some of the marmalade they made in manor, worrying way too much of Draco not eating enough.
After breakfast Draco went back to his dorm to get dressed. It was indeed good weather outside but it was still winter.
He didn't bother to change out of his sweater, well, it was Alec's but lately Draco has worn it so much that now he considered it his, before putting on his winter suede coat and pulling a hat over his messy blond hair.
He slowly walked back to the front staircase where Harry was waiting, an anxious grin plastered to his face.
- Hey. - Draco waved before sticking his hands back into his coat pockets.
- Hi. Ready to go? - Harry pushed his own hands in his pockets and started walking when Draco nodded.
They walked in a comfortable silence, Draco mostly had his head tilted a bit back, trying to get as much sun as possible but he could feel Harry's eyes landing on him time from time.
When a practically long stare landed on him, Draco finally cracked his eyes open and looked over to Harry, raising his eyebrow.
- Sorry, you're just beautiful. - Harry mumbled, blushing furiously and looking back downwards.
- Thank you? - Draco choked out, not really sure what he was supposed to do in such a situation.
- Can I hold your hand, maybe? Like, only if you want and feel comfortable with it, of course. Not that I'm forcing you into holding my hand, it's winter after all and you could feel a lot comfortable with your hands pushed in your pockets but I was just wondering. - Harry rambled, making Draco furrowed his brows.
- Did someone hex you or something? Stop being so damn nervous. - Draco rolled his eyes before pulling Harry's hand into his.
It felt familiar but also really weird in some way and Draco couldn't pinpoint what exactly made it that way so he just shrugged and continued walking, looking back up.
Harry let out a soft giggle.
They soon fall into easy chatter, walking around shop after shop.
Harry tried to get Draco to buy something but nothing seemed to catch Draco's attention, not even sweets.
So when they finally sat down for a butterbeer, Harry took a big sip before breaching the reason.
- What's bothering you? You are not really here. Spill. - Harry leaned closer, looking deeply into Draco's eyes.
- Nothing's wrong. - Draco huffed out a breath before taking a big sip of his own butterbeer.
- It's Alec, isn't it? - Harry crossed his hands over the top of the table.
- Why do you think so? - Draco leaned back in his chair, looking down at Harry, not liking where this conversation was going.
He really didn't want to fuck up what he and Harry was having right now.
- Because otherwise you would tell me. So, what did he do? - Harry took another sip of his drink, ready to listen.
- Nothing's wrong with him. - Draco let out, sounding a lot more defensive than would be needed.
- Mhm. - Harry pursed his lips, leaning back into his chair, mirroring Draco.
- Okay, fine! He is still angry with me. He wouldn't really write to me anymore. He would come to every Hogsmeade weekend but this time he just wrote "Can't. Have a game." and okay, he may have an actual game but still. He could have said something more than just a couple words. And I just don't know what to do to make it all better. I like being friends with him, you know that. And now I just don't have him as my friend anymore. - Draco let himself rant before downing almost all of his butterbeer.
- Then just tell him it all outright! Just write him a long letter by saying how you feel and what all that is doing to you. Offer to try sort out whatever problem you had that led to this. Hell, just firecall him, in that way he won't be able to really ignore you. It's hard to ignore a talking head in your fireplace. - Harry took a long sip of his drink, thinking over his words before leaning over their table and taking Draco's hand in his. - If I can help you in any way, I will. I hate seeing you this miserable. If you want, I could punch him. -
Harry wiggled his eyebrows, making Draco roll his eyes and softly punch him in the shoulder before ordering a cup of hot chocolate, all of sudden feeling a lot lighter.
Christmas was right around the corner and Draco felt really thankful for his tea drinking sessions with Remus.
After a well spent day with Harry, he felt a lot lighter and at ease but he still was a bit behind in schoolwork and there still was a dark cloud looming over him that was his failing friendship with Alec.
There just was something about Remus that could ground you and help you figure out the right ways of how to move towards your goal. Also, he felt fully safe with Remus.
He could sit there till midnight, wearing only comfortable sweatpants and oversize sweater that too have come from Alec's closet, his feet bare and just sipping tea, feeling fully comfortable and safe, feeling at ease and home.
Draco had just passed his last big classwork before Christmas break when a letter from his mother arrived.
His head was already hurting, his body tired and he let out a long sigh, slowly opening the letter, already knowing that whatever will be written there, it won't be anything good.
He sat down on his bed and opened the letter, pulling off of his tie as he read it.
Dear Draco,
I hope that your studies are going well.
I write to inform you about the annual Christmas Ball we are hosting.
It will happen on 24th December.
I know you won't have much time in between the train ride and start of Ball so I already ordered some new robes for you. I hope that they will fit.
Also, will you be bringing a plus one this year?
I got to ask to be able to make a guest list, so please let me know as soon as you can.
About Calming Draught and Muscle Relaxant, since it's just a couple of days till you come home, I won't be sending these to you right now.
If you really need them, I am sure that Severus will be able to get some for you.
With Love,
Narcissa M.
Draco huffed out a breath, dropping the letter on the bed before pulling off of his dress shirt and pulling on his latest favorite sweater, breathing in the faint Alec's scent that still lingered in the hem of the sweater, calming almost right away.
There just was something about that scent that was grounding Draco so he let himself drop backwards, closing his eyes in the way, pushing his nose against the sleeve of the sweater to be able to keep on breathing in the calming scent.
He have ran out of his calming essence last weekend, at first it wasn't so bad, he almost thought that he could actually go without using it, but in the end of the Monday, he was so on edge that he had a panic attack so strong in the bathroom that Blase had to drag him back to the bed, calling on Dobby to come and try calm Draco. Only after two hours have Draco calmed down enough to be able to breathe somehow normal, his body so exhausted that he was already falling into restless sleep.
He woke up just a couple hours after, feeling like he had dropped down all the stairs in the whole Hogwarts. That's when he discovered that he had also run out of his Muscle Relaxant, cursing in between sobs.
Since then the worst cramps hit him in the night, right when he was lulled in false safety by sleep.
He kindly asked his mother to send him more, but well, just his damn luck.
Draco groaned before pushing himself back up.
What he needed right now was a hot cup of strong tea.
He slowly made his way up from Slytherin dorms, just stopping shortly at the top of the stairs to consider if he wanted to go down to the kitchen or go up to Remus.
Kitchen was a shorter climb away but just the thought of having to endure through the whole rush of elfs trying to get something for him made him shudder a bit and slowly start to climb the stairs up to Remus chambers.
He was so damn tired that he really thought that he won't even get to Remus chambers and will just drop somewhere on the stairs and sleep.
Draco huffed out a struggling breath and kept going, letting himself fall into his favorite armchair with a loud groan.
- Hard day? - Remus asked, already pouring Draco a cup of tea and pushing a plate of small cake like things closer to him.
- Mh… - Draco murmured before taking a long couple sips of his tea, not opening his eyes, simply letting warmth of tea spread inside his chest, trying to fight off the spread of aches already claiming up his leg muscles.
Remus let him be, simply reading his book, scribbling down small notes, taking a sips of tea in between.
After several minutes Draco finally opened his eyes, trying to sit up straighter but groaning in growing pain, slumping back against the chair cushions.
- Did you go to Madam Pomfrey? - Remus put his book down, turning to look at Draco.
- No, she would just keep me in the hospital wing. And I don't want that. It's okay. I'm already used to it. - Draco shrugged, taking one of the small cake things. - Sirius? - Draco nods at the cake things.
- Yeah, he discovered a new cookbook so he's trying to literally make every single thing in it to prove to our neighbor ladies that he can be even better at houseworks. - Remus rolled his eyes fondly before taking a bite himself.
- He's good at it. He should open a bakery or something like that. -
- Don't encourage him! I will never hear the end of it otherwise! - Remus laughed.
Draco leaned over to take another piece but a tight grip was suddenly squeezing his chest sending his whole body into a violent shake. He pushed his arms against his chest, trying his best to calm down the shaking, not being able to even breath.
After nearly a minute the shaking stopped and the grip on his chest loosened a bit, he sucked in a shaky breath, slowly leaning back into the chair.
- Draco, you understand that this is not normal! - Remus said in a strict voice with affection, not taking his eyes off of Draco.
- For me it is. - Draco whispered, breathing unevenly, keeping his eyes closed.
- Just try to breathe as deep you can. - Remus got up and went over to the fireplace, dropping some floo powder into it and sticking his head in before calling out an address.
Draco let himself zoom out, concentrating on relaxing his body and actually remembering to breathe.
- Here, drink this. - Remus softly pushed hair out of Draco's eyes, helping him drink something from a small vial.
- What's that? - Draco finally opened his eyes after swallowing the sweet substance.
- Sirius brew for cases similar to these. Nothing bad or addictive. No need to worry, they actually do help, I know because I have used them myself quite a lot. Also, it's a go to for when bad days come for him. - Remus sat down, still watching Draco.
- He will need to teach me how to brew it. - Draco huffed out, feeling his whole body already relaxing, his mind clearing. - Damn, I haven't felt so good in weeks. This is even better than needing to drink calming draught and muscle relaxant every day. -
- Yeah, just as Sirius said. - Remus finally huffed out a laugh, finally relaxing a bit.
After a couple more minutes they fell back into their evening chatting so by the time when Draco left, he felt warm and relaxed, not having any problem falling asleep.
Draco wrote to Alec the next morning, asking him to come to the Christmas ball. He didn't really wait for a replay, there simply wasn't enough time, but he had a hope that Alec would come. How could he not? He always comes when Draco asks.
In the train he sat with Remus and the so-called golden trio, getting into multiple games of intense wizarding chess.
Sirius waited for them at the platform, pulling in a bone crushing hug first Harry and then Remus, softly pecking his lips, letting his arm rest over Remus waist.
- Brought you some more home baked goods. - Sirius winked at Draco, giving him a small but slightly heavy box before turning his all attention back to Harry.
Draco watched them go, feeling that small ache in his chest of distant want of such normal family, loving dad who would come to pick him up, listen for him to rant about his days away and after softly ruffle his hair while still having that gentle look on his face, full of love and adoration as if a child was the biggest miracle anyone could wish for.
No matter of how much time passed, there still stayed this distant ache, ache for something that he knew he can't have, that there was no possibility of ever having, but that irrational ache just stayed there with no explanation, nudging him softly, just hovering somewhere deep over some parts of his heart, just soft reminder of all the doomed "what if's".
Draco shook his head before heading to the exit but before he even got close a house elf called him to the side, side apperating him back to the manor.
He closed his eyes, feeling a sudden squeeze of going through the Manor's wards, opening his eyes to see the grand staircase hovering in front of him.
He huffed out a breath before making his way up, already yering for his massive bed with soft silk covers and nap he could take.
He dropped down in his bed, opening up the small box Sirius gave him.
It was filled with delicious smelling sweets, small notes hovering over them before Draco could reach into the box to take one.
- When you wish upon a star in a dark moment, the star may give in. -
Draco wanted to hug Sirius in that moment, noting in his head to thank properly next time he would see him.
He took a big bite of sweets, closing his eyes as a pleasant warm taste spread over his tongue, a tingling sensation traveling all over him, his whole body relaxing, his mind clearing and him overall calming down.
Draco shook his head once more before licking his fingers and getting up to get ready for family dinner.
Family dinner was tiring but for a surprise, his father was almost pleasant. Asking Draco about school and his excellent brewing in potions.
After they finished eating, his parents moved to the sitting room, his mother giving a quick hug to Draco before following Lucius.
Draco excused himself and went up to his room, falling backwards into his big bed.
For once, he could fall asleep without his mood being dampened by his father's wrath.
Morning came early.
His mother almost pulled him out of the bed and when Draco checked the clock it said that it's only 5:30.
- Mother, it's too early. - Draco groaned, trying to put his arms in the right nightgown holes.
- Try saying that to our guest. Come, breakfast is ready and your father is waiting. He's in good spirits today. - Narcissa pecked Draco on the temple, ushering him downstairs to the dining room.
- Morning, Father. - Draco greeted, aching for his cup of morning tea.
- Morning. Today we have a lot to do, so it would be advised that you change out of that silly dressing gown as soon as possible. But now, let's eat. - His father nodded, taking hold of his coffee cup and taking a long sip.
Draco suppressed an eye roll and reached out to take his steaming cup of tea, savoring the taste and warmth spreading through his chest.
He listened to his mother counting off all the things that they still needed to do before the guests started to arrive around six in the afternoon.
Draco listened with interest, even managing to eat more than just one slice of bread.
It was pleasantly easy to sit there and eat normally when his father wasn't in a bad mood or angry at him for something.
He noted to later asked Mother what had changed, if she had talked with Lucius or something.
The rest of the day went by quickly, everyone had a lot to do to make this winter ball fantastic.
Draco barely had time to sit down and eat something for lunch, and that was only because his mother ordered a house elf to get Draco something to eat and not let him out of the room till he hadn't finished his lunch.
So by the evening Draco already felt exhausted.
He sat down and nibbled on Sirius' sweets, closing his eyes and enjoying the tingling sensation spreading all over him before he fell backwards in the bed.
He looked over at the clock, noting that he still had time to quickly nap and then have enough time to get ready for the ball.
He called softly for their house elf who appeared only a second later, bowing deeply, it's long ears brushing the ground.
- Will you please wake me up after half an hour? I'll take a nap. - Draco didn't even get up from the bed.
- Of course, my young master. - The house elf bowed again before disappearing.
Draco sighed, curling on to his side and letting sleep take over his exhausted body.
He was woken up exactly half an hour later with a cup of freshly brewed tea.
- Thank you. - Draco closed his eyes, breathing in the fresh scent of tea.
The house elf bowed again, it really had unnaturally long ears, before disappearing.
Draco finished his cup of tea before taking a hot shower, something like excitement dancing deep inside his stomach.
His dress robes were laid out already, this time they were in beautifully blue tones and all Draco could think of by looking at them was Alec.
Even when he stopped by the mirror to comb his hair, he couldn't help but think of how good these robes would suit Alec.
Draco called on a house elf again, the same one with long ears appeared, bowing deeply in front of Draco.
- Can you please take a couple photos of me? I would like to send a photo to my friend later. He will want to remember tonight. - Draco looked back at the mirror, imagining Alec dressed all in blue, how they would match, their eyes bright.
- Of course, my young master. - The house elf bowed again before disappearing and appearing back with a camera in it's knitted hands.
Draco let the elf take a couple of photos before thanking it and sending it away.
He looked back in the mirror, straightening out the bowtie before nodding to himself.
He walked downstairs where mother and father were already waiting, everyone ready for the guests to arrive.
- Greet them politely. This will be a great night. - Narcissa smiled at Draco.
- Let the night begin. - Lucius called out, two house elves hurrying to open up the big doors to let the guests to come in.
All the high wizarding community people were streaming in, everyone making polite small talk, chatting about nothing and still managing to wrap inside it all some political deals.
Just a bit later champagne was brought out and even Draco got a glass.
He stayed his best self but when Harry arrived, he just shook his head and pulled him into a quick hug.
- This is some fancy shit. - Harry breathed out, taking his own glass of champagne.
- Yeah, a bit to that side, I guess. Summer balls are usually a bit more, hm, open, I guess. - Draco shrugged, earning a light punch from Harry to his arm.
- Show me around, will you? I don't know like 99% of these people. - Harry took a sip of his drink, scrunching up his nose at the taste. - What is this stuff? -
- Real champagne, holded ready in the stalactite caves. Bought specially for this occasion. Fancy shit, as Alec would say. - Draco shrugged again, leading Harry all around the big ballroom.
- Couldn't you stick to casual drinks? Firewhiskey, elf wine and all that stuff? - Harry murmured, looking all around.
- Well, you probably can get some high price ones of these at the open bar by the far wall but Champagne is more official for such balls. -
- More pureblood? - Harry raised his eyebrow.
- Probably. - Draco shook his head, pulling Harry to introduce him to the group of high rang quidditch players.
They walked around, talking politely with people, Harry being in ecstasy by chatting with big quidditch players.
They even managed to dance, Draco showing Harry how to wallse.
But no matter how much fun they had, Draco couldn't help himself but watch the door, waiting and waiting for Alec to finally show up.
- He won't come. - Harry sighed, running a hand through his hair.
- Hm? - Draco looked over at him, finally taking his eyes off of the door.
- He. Won't. Come. - Harry tried to hold his tone soft but there still was an edge of annoyance ringing through it.
- And how do you know that? - Draco furrowed his brows, feeling a pang of annoyance.
- Because then he would have already come. It's past midnight, Draco. He does't care. -
- Don't you dare say that! He probably had something important to do. - Draco crossed his hands over his chest, looking back at the door.
- Draco, wake up. - Harry sighed, sounding tired.
Draco looked over at him, glaring.
- I came. Don't you care about that? - Harry really looked tired, searching Draco's eyes.
- Of course, I do. I am glad that you came. - Draco let his arms fall by his sides.
- It doesn't seem like it. Instead of having a great time you are lusting after someone you can't have. -
- I don't… -
- Do you even feel anything for me? - Harry sounded desperate by now.
- Of course. - Draco replied without a pause, not taking his eyes off Harry's green ones.
Harry searched his eyes, something desperate written in his own.
He sighed and pulled Draco closer by placing a hand on the back of his neck.
- Wha…? - Draco started but Harry cut him off, he smashed their lips together, it was a hard press of lips, leaving Draco standing there stunned, not understanding what was happening.
Harry let him go before Draco could process to respond to the desperate kiss.
- That's what I thought. - Harry let his hand fall down to his side, sadness and something like anger written in his eyes. - Why do you always want what you can't have? -
Draco just stands there stunned, watching Harry nod once before turning on his heel and marching off, letting the big door fall shut behind him.
He flinched hearing the loud echo of the door shutting, closing his eyes for a moment.
Once again he felt something like a break in his heart.
There just were a tight grip of his chest, squeezing and squeezing while his heart fell, fell somewhere.
Draco wanted to cry but all he could do was just stand there, in a shadowed hallway, all alone and looking at the closed door, feeling like a kicked puppy.
Ball was still going on behind the wall, laughter of guests reaching Draco's eyes and making him sick.
He turned and walked away from the great hall, already trying to rip the tight fitting dress robes off of himself, he just needed to get them off to be able to breathe and to ease the tight squeeze on his chest.
He just crossed the threshold of his room, throwing the dress robes away over a chair when the door behind him fell shut.
He felt a chill run down his spine, he had only enough time to turn around before cold metal collided with his cheekbone, splitting the skin open and drawing blood.
But he stayed standing, not even daring to cup his bleeding cheek.
- What did that mean, boy? - Lucius snarled, anger boiling in his face.
Draco straightened his back, facing his father, too tired to deny anything.
- Harry kissed me before he left. - even to himself, his tone sounded flat.
- How dare he? Explain yourself. - Lucius holds on his cane only tightened.
- Explain what? That I like kissing boys and this wasn't even the first time? That Harry got pissed and left? What do I have to explain, father? - Draco was just tired, tired of it all, he just wanted to get in bed and fall asleep.
- My son is no disgrace of humanity! - Lucius roared, hitting Draco across the face with the head of his cane.
The force of the hit made Draco stumble over his own feeth and land down on his ass, staring up at his father, a sting of tears already biting his eyes.
- That Potter boy has ruined you. You are disgusting! - Lucius spat, landing another hit on Draco.
- He didn't ruin me! You did! - Draco couldn't stop himself from shooting back, raising his arm to stop the next hit.
His bones crunched on the collide with the cane, his arm falling down helplessly.
Lucius was cursing, spitting his words like daggers at Draco, matching each curse with a blow of his cane.
All Draco could do was lay there on the ground, dressed only in his boxers and plain satin undershirt, taking a hit after hit, tasting blood and choking on it, but never daring to scream out in pain.
It was bad, it was agonizing, feeling the metal bite into his flesh, tearing his skin and flesh apart, breaking and bruising bones but Draco caught himself thanking that it was just a bite of metal head of the cane not bites from his father's wand.
Just as if hearing his mind, Lucius finally let the cane clatter to the ground, drawing out his wand.
- My son won't be a disgrace! - He bit out through clenched teeth before throwing the unforgivable at Draco.
He felt it grip him, slowly spreading all through his bones and veins, he felt it as if on slow speed, his body lifting from the ground on the first spasms of torturing pain, his head falling back and hitting the ground, his broken bones twisting agonizing inside him.
His mouth fell open but no sound came out, just blood making it's way past the corner of his mouth, slowly trickling down over his bruised jaw, hitting the ground.
Draco couldn't hear, he was deaf to the world, his eyes only seeing blood red.
His body was trashed in painful spasms, twisting and twisting till he was just a mare rag doll, falling back to the ground.
He lay there unmoving, his eyes glassed over, fire and ice fighting over his body, tearing him apart from the inside.
His father was saying something to him but all Draco could hear was just the fight of fire and ice inside his body.
Lucius left sometime after, leaving Draco there, laying in a pool of his own blood, wishing to be able to disappear.
He had no idea how long he lay there but he was sure that Lucius would be back, that his anger couldn't be seethed so easily.
With some unknown strength Draco pushed himself to a sitting position, trying his best to ignore his body's protests.
Fear was settling over him, he could already hear Lucius coming back towards Draco's room.
He rasped out the name of one of their house elfs, spitting the blood out.
The elf popped up next to him, their eyes widening at the sight but still bowing lowly.
- Take me to London. Now. - Draco gritted out, fighting for breath, the need to hurry, Lucius was almost at the door now and Draco was sure that just one more blow and he would die.
The house elf listened, gripping his outstretched hand and apperating them to some park in London.
- Go, - Draco spit out, already turning his back to the elf.
It would have been easier to ask the elf to take him to the right address but then Lucius would easily find him in a matter of minutes and Draco couldn't let that happen.
He heard the elf disappear with a pop and breathed a sigh of relief before forcing himself to move, he just needed to move, move and not stop no matter what.
In the back of his head he knew that he was moving only thanks to the adrenalin and he had no idea what would happen when that would run out.
But he couldn't stop, fear was still holding him in their deadly grip, making it hard to breath.
Or was it the collapse of his lungs that made it hard to breathe?
Draco had no idea how a bad shape he was in, he just needed to move!
He stumbled through the small gates of a dark house, forcing himself to move up the couple stone steps without his legs slipping on the snow.
He fell against the cold door, gasping for breath, his whole body shaking.
It has started to snow, he noted.
He looked up at the starless sky, at the snow falling down with big fluffy flakes, covering everything into a thick fluffy blanket.
Snow has tried to wrap itself around Draco, he noted, his hair being full of it, big flakes sticking to his bloody body, making a weird sight to see.
He lost track of time, if he had any left, by looking at the freezing blood mixing together with half warmed snow, gathering at his already blue naked feet.
He let his head thud against the door before drawing his last strength to knock, distantly hoping that someone will be home.
After what felt like a fortnight, the door finally opened and blue swarmed into Draco's blotchy vision.
- Alec… - He breathed out before his body gave out, noting how frightened the blue eyes looked just before darkness overtook everything.