Chapter Twelve - Magic

"The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time."

-Mark Twain

"You're trembling, love, what's wrong?" Emma tucked her head under his jaw, holding onto him so tightly that she was surprised he was still breathing. His hand was buried in the mass of her hair, pressing her against him as he gently rocked her back and forth in his arms.

The words that she needed to explain her fear, to tell him that she somehow knew she was going to soon be pregnant and that their child would be in danger, just wouldn't form on her lips. How in the world she could know that was beyond her, but she did, with a certainty that was all encompassing.

"Just hold me," she finally whispered on a shaky exhale, needing a moment to find her equilibrium.

He did as she asked, wrapping her tighter in his embrace and pressing kisses into her hair to soothe her. When her heart had slowed and her pulse was under control again, she pulled back to look at him. He was clenching his jaw, a frown of concern darkening his features. He brought his hand to cup her face, his thumb pressed into the downturned corner of her mouth.

"Tell me," he said softly, the steady blue of his eyes giving her the strength she needed. She took a deep breath, her eyes sliding shut for a moment, the image of that blazing little globe immediately filling her vision with that feeling of...knowing following it.

"Emma," he prompted her.

"Don't ask me how I know, but," she took another deep breath before continuing, "the calendar I showed you before? That showed when the chances of me getting pregnant were highest?" He nodded in remembrance. "Well, we are most definitely going to...I just know there's going to be a baby at the end of all this, Killian."

She waited, watching as his look of concern changed to one of confusion.

"And we talked about that possibility, Emma. I'm not going anywhere. It's you and me together, remember?"

"I know." She smiled at him, remembering their talk and how calming his words had been. "It's just that I think the baby...I think it has something to do with that sphere Gold gave us. It's somehow all tied up together. And I'm worried that something's going to happen to it. The baby, not the sphere. Or maybe...both? God, I don't know, I just...know it's the truth."

She raked her hands through her hair as she walked away to look out over the wide expanse of sea surrounding them. She stepped closer to the railing, leaning into it as she worriedly bit her lip and contemplated her feelings. Killian stepped up next to her, reaching down to grasp her hand in his, watching her instead of the sea.

"We'll figure it out, Swan. It'll be okay."

"You think?" she asked, glancing over at him for a moment before looking back to the water.

"I don't think, Emma. It's like you said, love, I just...know. We'll get through this. Together." He squeezed her hand in his as he said it and once again, she heard the truth in his words. He was in this for keeps, wanting to share her life and be a part of her family.

The thought of family inevitably had her thinking of Henry, which brought a smile to her lips. She was going to have another one of those amazing creatures and this time, she'd get to hold him or her after they were born - she wouldn't have to give them away to be raised by someone else. She'd get to be part of so many memories, teach them so many things, be the mother that she couldn't have been when she was eighteen and alone...

Alone...

Keeping her child wouldn't be the only thing that was different this time around. She glanced at Killian, taking in his worried gaze and squeezing his hand to let him know she'd heard him, believed him when he said they were in this together. Killian would be beside her, he'd hold her hand through all of it, be with her at doctor's appointments and in the delivery room. He'd be there to help her, to take their child sailing, to show Henry how to be a good older brother. He'd love her and their child, their family, and there was nothing in this world that she wanted more than that. More than him.

So, if what she felt was true, then she needed answers to help her protect that family.

"When we finish up here and the incubus is finally dead, we need to find Regina and Gold. They're the only ones that will have the answers we need or at least, they'll know where I can find them."

"Your father was right, love, you and your family, you don't give up, do you?" he asked, pride evident in his smile as he pulled her back into his arms.

"Nope, we don't. And it's your family, too, by the way. Especially if you're going to father a member of it soon." A completely dazed looked came over his face then as if he hadn't quite heard her right. "You okay?" she asked, pressing her hand against his cheek, thumb brushing over his scar.

"Aye. It's just that the concept of conceiving a child is a bit different than the concept of raising one."

"Yeah, it can be a bit overwhelming when it finally hits you, the being a parent part." She thought back to the moment when she'd found out she was pregnant with Henry, how absolutely terrified she'd been of being a parent. Not of having a kid...of being a parent.

Yeah, that was a feeling you never forgot.

"It's overwhelming in a good way, Swan," he said, the dazed look still there, but happy excitement accompanying it.

"You sure? It's okay to admit if you're scared, you know." She smiled up at him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"Aye, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't, but I've always wanted to be a father."

"You have?"

"Such the tone of surprise," he teased, reaching up to bop her nose in tender amusement.

"It's just...you're a pirate. Children aren't conducive to that type of lifestyle."

"Given the right incentive a man can change anything in his life. And a child is just about the best incentive I've ever heard of, wouldn't you say, Swan?" She thought again of Henry and how she'd changed over the past two years in order to be the mother he needed. Yeah, she got that. "Besides, being a pirate is a profession, but being a father, that's...well, there's no comparison, really. I'd give up anything I needed to in order to be a good father." His words and his wistful expression did her in, her heart clenching almost painfully with love for this man.

"Any kid would be lucky to have you for a dad," she said, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes.

"What makes you so sure, Swan?" There was a note of self-doubt in his voice. She reached up to press her hand against his cheek again, loving the way his stubble pressed into the tender skin of her palm.

"I've watched you with Henry. And other than teaching him how to cheat," she frowned in disapproval at that before continuing, "you teach him how to take care of himself, you look out for him, you're patient with him, and you don't talk down to him. You keep him in line, but you let him be a kid. You encourage him to be himself. You care about him and he's not even yours. I trust you with him."

She paused here for a moment, swallowing over the sudden lump in her throat at realizing that this amazing man loved her son almost as much as she did.

"I've seen some really shitty fathers in my life, Killian, but when I watch you with Henry, the only thing I see is someone who has all the makings of a really great dad." The expression in his eyes caused those damn tears in hers to multiply and when he leaned down to kiss her ever so softly, she saw the sparkle of similar ones in his. As gentle as he was, it wasn't long before her heart was racing for him again, her body desperate for the release only he could provide.

"Phone," he demanded against her mouth, beginning to walk her backwards toward the hatch. She groaned when they reached it and she had to pull away from him to climb below. He followed her quickly, jumping down the last few rungs of the ladder to land at her feet, stumbling as he pressed her into the hallway wall. His body was hard and insistent as he held her there, his leg coming up between her thighs to press against her sex. Her fingers dragged through his hair, scratching at his scalp and loving the growl of approval he gave.

As wonderful as what he was doing felt and as turned on as she was by his eagerness, she suddenly realized that it had been a while since she'd used the bathroom. She supposed being pressed up against the wall with the bathroom door just feet away had planted the idea in her head, but now that it was there, she couldn't shake it.

"Killian?" she asked in between his kisses, trying to get his attention.

"Damn it, Swan, I'm busy," he murmured, reaching down to the hem of her nightgown and beginning to slide it up her legs.

"Killian. I need a moment."

"What?" He pulled back, his gaze dazed and unfocused.

"The bathroom. I need a moment." She tilted her head toward the bathroom door.

"Oh." He stepped back from her, running his hand over his face as if to gather himself. "Oh. I'll just wait for you in the other room then."

"I'll be quick, I promise. Don't look at the phone without me!" She stepped up to him, kissing his cheek before turning to the bathroom. "And don't fall asleep!" she warned over her shoulder.

"Aye, aye, Sheriff!" he teased, reaching down to lightly smack her ass as she stepped away from him. She turned to glare at him, hands on her hips.

"I mean it, Killian. Don't lay down on the bed and keep the door open. I'll be as quick as I can. Be careful!" she called after his retreating back, shaking her head as he threw a nonchalant wave over his shoulder.

Turning toward the bathroom door, she opted on keeping it cracked a bit, so that she could hear him if he called for her. She took care of her needs quickly, pausing afterward to check her appearance in the bathroom mirror.

Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were sparkling, hair a tangled mess of curls. There were love bites all over her neck and chest, even one or two along her inner thigh next to the scrapes and bruises the incubus had left there. Was that only last night, she thought in wonder. She checked the scratch on her side, noting that it looked raw, but not deep.

She turned away from the mirror, biting her lip in excited anticipation of finding out if she and Killian could finally just...fuck. It'd been such a long build up and she was ready - really, really - ready for what came next.

She knew something was wrong the second she stepped into the captain's cabin. Killian was sitting at the table, hunched over the charts he'd left there. Her heart stopped as she took in the pale and lifeless expression on his face, his cheek pressed down on the table.

No!

She was at his side and on her knees in seconds, shaking him repeatedly and calling his name. Nothing. No response, not even a flutter of his pretty eyelashes. He was cold, almost clammy, and when she pressed her fingers to his pulse, it took her a moment to find it.

She'd only been gone a minute or two. The incubus had to be dying, had to be barely holding on...he couldn't have gotten to Killian this quickly, he just couldn't!

"Killian!" She cried out, standing to push him back against the chair, his head rolling to the side, arms dangling over the armrests. She grabbed his shoulders and shook him for all she was worth, panicked whimpers tearing out of her throat when nothing happened.

"Don't you dare leave me!" she cried, dropping to her knees again and staring up at him.

Water...he'd used water to wake her when the incubus came after her last time. The closest thing she had was the wine left over from their snack. She raced over to grab the wineglasses from beside the bed, returning to his side and pouring them over his head.

Nothing. Damn it!

Think, Emma, she told herself, knowing that Killian hadn't given up that easily when she was in the same situation. Pressing her hand to his pulse again, she stared down at him, willing him to wake up. Her eyes landed on his lips and without even thinking, she leaned down and pressed her mouth to his.

She loved him, she did, and she knew, even though he'd never said the words, that he loved her as well. She didn't know if this was True Love, but she'd never felt this way about anyone else and that had to count for something, didn't it?

But even as she pressed her mouth to his, she knew that nothing was happening, nothing was changing. He was unresponsive, his lips a cold line beneath hers.

"Killian, please," she sobbed, bringing her hands up to the sides of his face, holding him against her lips as she cried. She wrapped her arms around him, cradling him against her with his head tucked underneath her chin as she rocked him back and forth.

"Don't leave me," she whispered into his hair, her chest feeling empty and aching with the thought of losing him just when they'd been so close to finding happiness with each other. How could this be the end of what had felt fated, magical even, right from the start?

Magical.

Her eyes popped open. Magic! Her magic!

She pushed him back against the chair, sniffling and swiping at her nose, brushing her hair angrily away from her face. Not sure how to do exactly what needed to be done, she sat down on his lap, knees on either side of his hips, her hands pressed to his chest. She noticed that a long, angry scratch was forming under her palms as she settled against him and she knew that her time was running out. The incubus was making true on his threat of flaying Killian.

Anger gripped her and she promptly put her hands against the red welt, willing it to stop. She closed her eyes, concentrating, not on the anger that was rushing through her veins, but on the love she felt for this man.

It was deep and passionate and abiding. And it was true, kiss be damned.

She could feel the power in her arms, in her hands, feel the spark of magic as she pressed against him. Focusing all her strength, she pictured one of his giddy, silly smiles and then projected her love forward into his body, feeling his skin instantly warm under her palms. Then he was stirring against her, and when she opened her eyes, he was sputtering, blinking up at her in confusion, but very much alive.

"Killian!" she cried, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him up against her. "You stupid idiot, I told you to be careful!"

She lost it then, sobbing uncontrollably against him, pressing kisses all over his face. She kept asking if he was okay, but not actually giving him the opportunity to respond as she pressed more and more kisses into his mouth.

God, she'd never been so terrified in her life.

"Emma," he said softly, catching her hand in his as he pressed his stump to her side. "I'm fine, love." She looked down into his eyes and saw that he was, but her heart continued to race with fear and she couldn't seem to slow it down, despite the warmth of his body or the color filling his cheeks.

"What happened?" she asked him.

"I sat down to look at the charts, wanting to confirm our location and the next thing I knew, I was on the deck of the Jolly." He swallowed hard before continuing. "I was so happy for a moment, but then I knew it wasn't her, it wasn't really my ship. She felt...wrong."

"Was he there?" Emma asked, her eyes wide with fear.

"He was, but he didn't look like me. He looked like you, love."

"Oh," she responded, her eyes widening more. "Like me? I didn't know he could do that."

"Nor I, but I suppose it makes sense. He appears as the object of your desire and you are that for me." He leaned his head back against the chair, taking a deep, steadying breath as he stared up at her. "His eyes...they weren't your eyes. They were black as sin. I knew it wasn't you the moment I looked into them. When I tried to attack him, he came at me, used my own hook on me."

"I know. I saw." She pressed her hand into his chest causing him to wince. He looked down in amazement as he traced the red scratch down his chest. "Does it hurt?"

"Stings a bit, nothing more. He didn't get a chance to really dig into me before this amazing white light surrounded us. I've never felt so warm all in my life, so safe. Was that you, love?" He looked up at her in awe.

"I couldn't think of what to do and then I remembered my magic and I just had to try. I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"No, love, you didn't hurt me." He smiled up at her, reaching up to wrap his hand around the back of her head and pulling her mouth to his, whispering a thank you into her lips before settling back against the chair.

"He's desperate, I'd say. I'd bet my hook on the fact that he's almost dead now."

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, reaching up to smooth his hair back from his forehead and then thumbing his scar for a moment as she looked at him in concern.

"I'm fine, Emma, really." He paused, searching her face before saying softly, "I'm sorry you had to deal with him alone for the past few weeks. I saw a bit of what you experienced in those dreams, love. You're bloody amazing, you know that?"

She blushed at the compliment, trailing her hands along the scruff of his jaw before she leaned down to kiss him again. She sighed at the warm press of his lips against hers. She'd almost lost him, but he'd survived, he was here, and she'd be damned if she was going to give that fucking incubus one more moment of her life.

She scooted back on his lap, making enough room between their bodies so she could slide her hand over his taut stomach and into his pants. She found his length, already semi-hard from just a few of her kisses. Wrapping her hand around him, she gave him several long strokes, marveling at how quickly he sprang to life within her grasp.

"Emma," he warned her, grabbing her wrist to stop her then pushing her off his lap and standing quickly. She settled her hands at his waist, helping to steady him. "I'm okay, love," he whispered to her, kissing her again as he impatiently yanked her nightgown over her head, tangling his hand into the long strands of her hair as she pressed her body tight into his. She sighed against his mouth, tripping over his feet as she began pushing him backwards toward the bed.

"Gods, I need you, woman," he whispered harshly into her mouth, his hand everywhere on her body, his stump rubbing against her heated flesh as they awkwardly stumbled to the bed.

"Phone. Need the phone," she reminded him when he kept trying to stall them, distracting her with his hand and his mouth and his heat.

When they finally made it to the bed, Emma made a quick dive towards the phone. It was sticking out from under one of the pillows and she palmed it, hands shaking as she activated it. Swiping her thumb across the screen, she grinned when she saw Regina's message and the accompanying picture. She opened up the photo, staring in awe at the vibrant light emanating from the little globe, pride expanding in her chest.

And then she noticed the words typed beneath the image, direct and to the point.

'finish it'

Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, she prayed, closing her eyes for a moment in relief.

She tossed the phone to the side, sliding to the end of the bed on her knees and reaching forward to grab the waistband of Killian's pants, yanking hard. He took an ungainly step to her, grabbing her shoulder for balance, staring at her in question.

She looked at him, not saying a word as she traced the beautiful lines of his face. "Emma?" he asked, breath catching in his throat as he waited for her response.

She couldn't help the giddy grin that burst onto her face as she asked, "Care to help me kill an incubus, pirate?"

He grinned before pulling her tight to his body and replying, his mouth hovering over hers, "The only thing that would give me greater pleasure than taking his life would be creating one with you, love."

And when he pressed his lips to hers, she sighed, thinking only one word...

Finally.