December 24, 1937
"Is this your lunch?" Siegfried put a piece of bread in his mouth and turned to his brother. "How depressing." Tristan sat across from him at the dinner table and immediately started to spread pate on a slice of bread for himself.
"With the party preparations, there was no time for lunch and you know how she is with her cooking. She takes the preparation of Christmas Dinner too seriously. I thought maybe this time she would let me get something, but she banished me from the kitchen, again."
Skeldale House had dawned with an incredible, succulent smell that got everyone out of bed early in the morning, to find themselves with a ready breakfast on the plates with the guidance to eat and leave the kitchen as soon as possible.
Watching her, despite his low head, Siegfried saw Audrey walking back and forth, picking up dishes, mixing ingredients and stirring the pots on the stove. For someone with zero culinary knowledge, all those processes being performed at the same time was comparable to magic. He wished to know a little more than boiling water and heating food in order to help with anything. It would be nice to be able to spend the day doing things together, just enjoying each other's company, especially when free days were a rarity.
None of them dared to upset her and they ate in silent speed. James said he would spend the day with Aldersons and be back in time to get ready for the party.
"Well, if it's any consolation, she never let me taste anything before the right time either." Tristan commented before biting his bread.
They ate in silence. Audrey should be able to enjoy the holidays more. Only now he understood how inopportune his party ideas turn out to be for her. Well, maybe with some adjustments the parties could be better organized and she had time to rest and enjoy. His thoughts were lost when Tristan took a small gift box out of his pocket and placed it on the table.
"What is this, little brother?" Siegfried asked suspiciously. Was Tristan giving him a gift? But it was still Christmas Eve and usually his gifts were some kind of replacement. The previous year it had been a bottle of his good whiskey, to replace the one he had drunk.
"My Christmas present for Maggie. Take a look and tell me what you think."
Inside the box, two hairpins with bright stones sparkled in contact with the light.
"Did you choose yourself?" Siegfried asked, incredulously.
"Of course I did. Why?" Tristan replied, apprehensive.
"You had good taste. I think Margareth will like it." It was not too intimate or too casual a gift. It showed that Tristan had paid attention to her tastes and was concerned with choosing something suitable. Apparently his little brother had really found a path. "Christmas gifts and expectations... Should I understand you are finally together?"
"Not exactly." Tristan's stance withered a little. "Women can be terribly resentful when we make mistakes, but we are progressing a little more each day." Over time Tristan will understand that it is not a grudge, that this is the way women sometimes use to discipline their men. "She's a wonderful girl, big brother. I wish I hadn't been such a fool."
"A lesson learned. Next time, you'll think a little more before you make the same mistake."
Tristan nods and they eat in silence for a while.
"You bought something for Mrs. H I presume."
"Yes, I did." Siegfried did not want to go into details. In fact, he hoped to be able to give his gift at a more reserved moment, without the boys.
"And?" Tristan insists.
"What?" He tries to disguise it.
Tristan rolls his eyes. "What did you buy, why?"
"Nothing much. I came across something that I thought would be the perfect gift, but then I remembered how it looked last year and I thought it best to avoid an argument this Christmas. "
Siegfried had gone to get the buttoners he ordered to give as a gift to his brother and saw a beautiful pair of pearl earrings. Nothing fancy, just a delicate pearl in each earring, that would go perfectly with Audrey. But he knew she would absolutely refuse to accept and was now hidden in the bottom of his desk drawer.
"She was really furious!" Tristan laughed as he remembered how offended she had been the year before. The memory was not that funny for Siegfried. "Maybe she was expecting something more personal than a bonus, big brother. Have you thought about it?"
Tristan's comment surprised him. Had she been offended because she expected more from him? His intention was for her to buy something good for herself with the bonus, something she wanted.
"To be honest, no." Since when did she... The thought had barely begun to form and was interrupted by Tristan.
"Well, I wouldn't risk asking her about it." Taking the matter over, he insisted again. "So, are you going to tell me or are you going to be secretive about the gift?"
"Weel, it's silly!" Siegfried sighed and leaned back heavily. "I bought her warm socks." Saying it aloud, the gift sounded awful. Maybe he should give her the earring aswell.
"You bought ger socks for Christmas?" Tristan was stunned. "Siegfried, what did you go through to buy something so absolutely dull? My gift is certainly a lot more attractive than yours."
"Audrey will understand." He hoped at least. That night, on James' birthday, she had asked if he could buy her socks to keep her feet warm. The present was a temporary solution, he wanted to be able to warm their feet personally in the not-too-distant future and hoped to make that implicit. Not as a suggestion, but as a promise?By next winter he hoped that their situation had become definitive, so to speak. "What did you buy for her?"
"Oh, so does it have a meaning?" A malicious giggle appears on Tristan's lips. "Even so, it can't be just that!"
"But it will be. Audrey is absolutely different from..." Siegfried swallows and is silent for a few seconds. Tristan for the first time doesn't look at him with pity, that's a relief. He is not in the habit of bringing Evelyn as a topic in conversation even with his brother. "She liked the big gestures."
"Without a doubt, she liked to be pampered." Tristan smiles, as if remembering Evelyn laughing at the silly grand gifts Siegfried used to give her for birthdays and Christmas. "Maybe Mrs. H just doesn't know how to handle it." He says at last.
Tristan's words made sense. Perhaps Audrey did not take well what she thought was too much because she had never been pampered by anyone before.
After a long day Audrey was finally done. The food for the party was ready and the supper for the next day almost finished. Just another half hour of oven and it would be ready. She could spend Christmas Day with her feet up, eating and resting in the company of her three boys. The thought brought a silly little smile to her lips. None of them were really boys, but in one way or another they had become hers and her theirs. Her family, or part of it.
After half an hour in the bath, she felt refreshed and ready to get ready for the night. On her dressing table's mirror Father Christmas waved at her from Edward's card. Audrey hoped her son would also be happy. Forty minutes later she was ready and Siegfried looked at her in surprise and admiration when she came into the room in her best dress and with the loose hair that she rarely wore.
They went to mass hand in hand and at that moment the house was full of people walking around, laughing and talking, giving warm hugs and helping themselves to food and drink. It was a relief for her to see that most of their closest friends did not bother at all with the idea of her and Siegfried being together, on the contrary.
Surrounded by friends, he talked cheerfully, laughing and drinking. Among the other men, with is left hand tucked into his coat pocket, she saw him stand out in distinction. Siegfried Farnon was a good and handsome man. But what caught her attention the most that night was the fact that his eyes were constantly searching for her.
At first Audrey raised her eyebrows in question at him, but Siegfried just smiled. She then understood that he was not trying to communicate, he was just looking at her and it made her smile embarrassed. Having his gaze on her so constantly was unsettling in a way that didn't bother. It was different. It was something she couldn't ignore, close to the sensation of something sliding through her skin. Unsettling and... exciting.
While talking and laughing with the other women about the amenities of the holidays, Audrey watched James and Helen. They seemed to be in good spirits and excited in each other's company. A hand against her lower back brought her back to the conversation and she saw Siegfried finally standing beside her.
"Can I steal her from you for a minute?" He asked the ladies with a gallant smile.
Nobody contested it. The ladies agreed smilingly and kept talking to each other when they walked away down the hall. Siegfried guided her into the back hall, leaving her curious and slightly apprehensive. Audrey turned to him, there the sounds of conversation were more diffuse and there was no one in the kitchen.
"Something happened.." The question she started asking was lost when he kissed her, wrapping his arms around her waist and bringing her to him.
She offered no resistance when she returned his kiss and nestled comfortably against his body. Resisting him was becoming more difficult with each day, with each new moment stolen throughout the day. Audrey relaxed in his arms and cupped his face.
"Siegfried..." She tried to contest without much emphasis when their lips parted.
"We still have forty-five seconds." He murmured against her lips, his eyes full of mischief.
"How much did you drink?"
"I can assure you, in case you have any doubts, that I am perfectly lucid, my dear. This is not an effect of drinking. " He held her face in his hands so gently that she sighed. "I missed you."
Audrey smiled and shook her head, amused.
"Don't be daft. I've been here all day."
"So close and yet so far." His noses rub against each other.
She leaned over and kissed him again. The soft kiss lingered for a few seconds.
"We need to go back." Audrey said as she released him. He looks visibly disappointed. "We can continue this later if you are not tired or drunk."
"I wont be." He responded with such certainty that it made her weak.
She needs a drink, urgently. Or maybe two.
The party was a real success. Everyone seemed to have fun and enjoyed the evening.
They sat side by side for a long time, after everyone was gone and part of the mess was put in order, paying attention to the house noises. Everything was quiet and peaceful. Upstairs the boys were already in bed, probably almost, if not, asleep.
Siegfried's glance was filled with want and craving and Audrey pressed her lips together to keep from smiling. From the first moment, they both knew that the situation would become more difficult over time. That delicate kisses would become more urgent, that their hands would wander in more tortuous ways, and that their need for each other would increase. Seeing the desire so evident in his eyes made her realize how much she wanted him too. At some point the platonic love she felt had been transformed, strengthened and overflowed.
Up close, his eyes looked full of fire. The intensity of his gaze contrasted with the delicacy of his gestures. He traced her lips with his thumb, cupping her face. It was a loving gesture, which aroused the need for her to be close. Audrey pulled him close and he didn't hesitate to wrap her in a tight hug. Their noses brushed each other and she watched him closely.
His lips collided with hers. Their kiss was not romantic, it was filled with longing and desire, it was voracious and breathtaking. It was full of want, with a touch of passion and a strong note of whiskey, which Audrey doesn't know if it came from him or her. Maybe both. After all, a party night is not a party night without a few excesses.
He pulled her even closer, desperate for more contact, but the sofa limited his movements. So Audrey decided to be practical and throw caution out the window for at least one night. Pulling the skirt up with one hand she pushed him against the sofa with the other, while he looked at her confused, she straddled him.
Maybe it was the alcohol, the excitement of the party, all those stolen moments over the past two weeks. Maybe it was the way he spent all night looking at her or the fact that he pulled them away from the others just to kiss her, but something gave her courage and she needed that contact.
Surprise took the place of the confusion on his face and Audrey noticed how dark his eyes become as he took a deep breath, waiting. Suddenly the hunter had become the prey and she wondered if that was way beyond what he had in mind throughout the night.
They faced each other, contemplating each other's desire. Audrey felt his arousal between her legs, pressed against her center. Her breath became labored with mere anticipation. Any doubt that he really wanted her simply evaporated. At that moment she knew that surrendering to him physically would never be a duty or an obligation, and the fact that he didn't even move made it clear that he would never take her against her will.
Siefgried held her by the waist, but made no other move. His eyes sought permission in hers and when Audrey leaned towards him, he kissed her again, exploring her mouth unhurriedly. The growing tingling in his pants was alarming, but her kisses were intoxicating and he couldn't resist the temptation to continue and there was no point in resisting. Audrey was sitting on him, feeling the evidence of his desire. There was no more to hide.
Instinctively Siegfried's hands found her knees and moved slowly upward, following the stockings towards her thighs, causing a shiver when they pass the stockings's welt and the fingertips finally find her skin, burying themselves in the tender flesh when he squeezed her flesh.
With their torsos pressed together, Siegfried makes a guttural sound in her mouth when the friction becomes too much. Her hands roamed his back for a moment before Audrey leaned back. If it weren't for his hands on her buttocks she would have fallen to the floor trying to open his vest buttons. His tie ends up lying next to them on the sofa and with nimble fingers she opens the first buttons of the shirt in a continuous movement. He groans under his breath when her mouth explores his neck, collarbone and hollow throat.
Siegfried smells of smoke, good whiskey and expensive cologne. Where the beard is shaved his skin is soft and attracts her lips as if they were made for each other.
None of them can remember the last time they felt so excited. The tension inside them grows and the tingling sensation starts to give way to an insistent throbbing.
Nothing would stop them from simply going to the bedroom and surrendering to each other. Dropping their clothes on the floor and giving in to that desire, but still they don't. The way they looked at the feelings was so raw that no other moment, in comparison, would be so intimate.
Her hands pressed to his flanks and Siegfried pulled her closer to him, making her slide so she could feel his arousal. When Audrey subtly moved her hips, a groan escaped his lips. He turns his face to kiss her while his hands press on her hips to make her move again.
Their mouths meet in a hungry, deep kiss. The heat only increases, as does the humidity between her legs.
"Don't stop, please, my darling," Siegfried pleaded, in a whisper.
Their eyes met and remained locked while his hands guided her until a rhythm was established. Although she wants to kiss him, Audrey can't take her eyes off his, even when the desire to have one of his hands between her legs makes her blush violently. It is foolish, she knows, that prudish feeling. There are moments that are made only to be felt, exclusively, and that was one of them. Rationalization could come later.
The heat started to become unbearable. A few minutes earlier Audrey had her feet chilled in her shoes and at that moment drops of sweat were sprouting on her forehead and the back of her neck, running slowly down her spine as she gripped the back of the sofa with her fingers to keep herself steady.
Siegfried buried his right hand in her hair, enjoying the delicacy of the loose strands against his skin. She closed her eyes and purred like a cat. He smiled, pressing his mouth against her neck. Audrey's skin tastes like home. Muffling his groans on her skin, he trailed his lips on her skin back to her mouth.
They kiss until the air in their lungs are extinguished and do it again and again. Time stopped and everything became a sensation. The tingling became a pulse. Siegfried moved his hips at the same pace as her and Audrey's head tilted back when she shuddered over him finding her release.
She with her curls out of alignment, her skin pink and shiny with the effort and her lips parted in a perfect O in a silent cry of pleasure was an image that he will carry until his last breath. It was so tempting that he would like to keep going, to touch her and feel the pulse between her legs with his fingertips, to taste her, to bury himself deep in that vibrant humidity... With that thought he reached his release.
Siegfried pulled her to him and against her mouth he let his hoarse, low moans escape as the pleasurable relief coursed through his body and did a mess inside his pants.
They held each other panting for a long time until Audrey dropped back onto the couch next to him, smoothing her skirt back into place. Her thigh muscles were burning, but that vigorous exercise was more than welcome.
"When I bought your Christmas present I didn't think you were going to be so warm." Siegfried said, looking out of the corner of his eye with a smug smile.
"You bought me socks!" Audrey laughed, unable to contain herself. Although she asked for them a few months ago she didn't expect him to take her seriously.
"Yes, as a symbolic form of.." He starts, but is silent, moistening his lips with the tip of his tongue. What he wanted to symbolize was quite clear after all.
Audrey frowned momentarily. A symbolic form of...? It didn't take a genius to understand. He wanted to keep her feet warm. With a small smile she kissed him on the cheek.
"The socks are welcome, after all, I still have my feet cold most of the time." Her comment made him laugh.
"Maybe I've also bought you something else." Siegfried said, trying to sound innocent, but she knew him too well and he saw the alarm on her face.
"Siegfried, what did you do?"
He just laughed and pulled her into a tight hug. Audrey would be surprised and shocked, but he wouldn't take no for an answer.
I must say I'm not so sure about this chapter, but anyway. What is done is done.
Merry Christmas and thanks for reading!