"William!"

Lancelot blinked his eyes as he remembered his voice crying out for his friend. Looking straight ahead he watched the wooden pyre burn with William's cape and sword upon it. All the knights and some soldiers stood lined up to pay respect to the one who gave his life to save everyone else.

Forcing his eyes away from the flames he watched as Madelyn walked closer, alongside Gwen. The female servant had tears falling down her cheeks and Lancelot knew this was hard for her, she did after all have a special relationship to the lost knight of Camelot.

Lancelot moved his gaze towards the woman beside Gwen and he felt a sting in his heart. When Madelyn had woken up on the way back from the Isle of the Blessed, she had refused to speak to anyone, even Merlin. Sighing he felt the shame rise up inside himself again as he remembered how he treated her and was about to leave her alone. If it wasn't for William, Madelyn would be the woman standing by the pyre with tears falling down her cheeks.

Soon everyone started to leave the courtyard, Lancelot watched as Arthur spoke to Gwen a final time before walking away. Gwen stood crying with Madelyn by her side, Madelyn simply beeing there as support. Lancelot moved his eyes to Madelyn's face, and he knew she knew he was watching her. Her eyes were focused on a single spot of burning wood and wouldn't look at him. With a pained heart and mind, Lancelot walked away, leaving the two women alone.

Madelyn stayed by Gwen's side. Madelyn couldn't really explain all the hurt she felt but she knew she felt betrayed. Her anger was still burning strong, and she still couldn't even find it in herself to even look at the man her heart cried out for.

Walking closer, she rested a hand on the back of her friend. She now knew about the promise William had made Gwen and so she understood the guilt that Gwen felt for William's sacrifice. All she could do at the moment was be there for her friend.

Grief for those lost was yet again in Camelot. Even in the quarters of the royal seamstress. The last night with the attacks from the Dorocha, Jayne and Gilda had been helping out when suddenly a Dorocha made it into the rooms and Gilda had protected Jayne with her body.

Madelyn stood in silence as she held a crying Jayne as they watched Gilda burn with the rest of the victims. The tears wanted to fill Madelyn's eyes but she simply blinked them away and held her apprentice closer. She needed to be strong, right now was not the time to fall apart.

A small hand on her arm made her turn her head and beside her she found the old seamstress, lady Celia, also dressed in black to pay respect. The elder seamstress smiled a small, respectful and comforting smile and then turned her eyes to the ceremonial pyre aswell.

Beside Lady Celia, Lord Agravaine walked up as he watched the people of Camelot mourn their lost ones. Madelyn nodded his way, grateful for his presence and she watched as he walked around giving people his condolences.

Thank the gods for people like Celia and Agravaine.

A few weeks later and Camelot seemed to feel better after all this grief. Madelyn had quickly started working again and now Jayne worked harder than ever. Together they managed to still keep the shop open aswell as keeping Madelyn's work at court effortless.

Madelyn's relationship to those dear to her still wasn't back to what it used to be. Merlin had wormed his way back into her life, even tho it wasn't as it used to be. Probably because how they disagreed on the people in the court.

"Merlin, I've told you I don't want to listen to this..." Madelyn sighed, tired but also slightly aggravated as Merlin yet again tried to warn her of keeping the company of Arthur's uncle.

"Maddy, please just listen to me! I'm telling you that Agravaine isn't-" As Merlin spoke Madelyn turned on the spot and interrupted her brother.

"Merlin." As Merlin opened his mouth she raised her hand and silenced him. "I don't know what you have against Lord Agravaine, but please understand that he and I share a close friend in lady Celia. If you have clear proof that Agravaine is as bad as you think he is, I will listen. But until then, please let's not talk about him."

As Merlin didn't continue speaking but eventually nodded agreeing the two continued talking about certain things. But they still didn't talk about other sore subjects like... Him.

Madelyn's heart stung as she thought about the man she still loved and wanted. The two hadn't been speaking other than when they absolutely had to, and they kept their conversation short. Well, Madelyn did. Lancelot tried to speak to her on many occasions. He always approached with respect and never did he speak up in a loud voice, he always bowed and nodded respectfully when Madelyn declined his invitations for a talk. But Madelyn saw the pain in his eyes every time they would meet in the corridors or on the street, and she even berated herself for beeing so childish and stubborn.

Madelyn's anger had now turned into a sadness and Madelyn had started to dream of Lancelot dying or breaking up the courting. Every time she woke up from one of those nightmares she promised she would talk to him the next day, but every time she saw him her words got stuck and the two walked right by each other.

Lancelot understood Madelyn's reaction and blamed it all on himself. His normally cheerful and smiling personality dimmed down and soon no one in the court recognised they two people from afar. Anyone who watched Madelyn or Lancelot from a distance realised something wasn't as it should be, but everytime they interacted with people they would smile and act as their old selves. When Madelyn interacted with people she smiled her usual kind, warm and gentle smile and if Lancelot was watching he would look at her and feel a part of him cry. The same happend for Madelyn if she happend to see Lancelot interact with other people and so the heartbreaking vicious circle continued.

Tonight was particularly heavy for the knight to handle. Sitting by the fire in his small room he looked at the object in his hand. It felt cold and heavy as he turned it with his fingers. Tonight was the night he had planned to give Madelyn this gift as a token of the end of their courting. Well, it was planned before the events of Samhain. Sighing with a heavy heart he felt his throat tighten up as his eyes stung. Would she even want to marry him now? Was the courting still something she wanted? Feeling the fear of losing Her creep over him he closed his eyes as he gripped the ring. What was he without her?

Madelyn sat by the fire in her chambers as she was doing the final stitching on her last order. Her eyes was tired but she rarely slept in fear of the nightmares and so she occupied herself with all the work she could find. Well... almost. Her eyes briefly flew over the chest in her chambers that she hadn't opened for a long time. Would she ever have to finish it? Would she ever have the need for the dress inside?

A small prick in her finger made her look down and she realised she had pricked her finger on the needle. The pain came and went before she even had time to think, and yet she found tears falling down her face.

And she cried.

Gwen watched Merlin pace back and forth. She knew he was trying to find a way to get his sister and best friend to start talking again and she smiled. Gwen came to Merlin as she noticed how Madelyn didn't seem to fit her dresses as she used to, and she was worried that she wasn't doing so fine as Madelyn claimed to be.

Merlin was almost about to launch himself out of the room when he heard but was stopped but Gwen. They needed another way for the couple to reconcile then to lock them up in a room together.

"He loves you." Merlin sighed out in a quiet voice as he watched the fire with his sister after they had dined together. Madelyn flinched at the sudden seriousness in his voice and felt her throat tighten up. As Merlin noticed his sister's mind and thoughts starting to struggle he added. "I know you love him still. All I wish to know is do you still want to marry him?" Madelyn knew the answer before he even finished the question and nodded silently. Merlin nodded and looked back into the fire and didn't bring the subject up again.

After Merlin left that evening, Madelyn had a good night sleep for the first time in weeks.

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