Sorry for the delay everyone. FFN were obviously having some troubles last weekend when I posted Chapter Twelve. I think it was happening to other authors too so maybe a site error. The chapter just wouldn't upload properly! Very frustrating. So make sure you've read that one first if you think you missed it.

Anyway, onto the very unlucky number thirteen. I'm sure your superstitions will be proven correct in this one. But please be nice haha. And have faith.

As always, JKR is the pioneer, I'm just following in her footsteps.

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Chapter Thirteen

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Draco smiled at the lady behind the counter as he handed over his muggle money. As she wished him a lovely day, he grasped the bouquet of flowers in his hand nervously and stepped out onto the street. Looking down at the beautiful pink peonies he was carrying, Draco took a deep, steadying breath.

Just be calm and sincere and you'll do fine, he told himself.

This was it. He was going to lay all his cards on the table and ask Hermione to be his wife for real. He was tired of being alone and he knew that after all these years of living half a life, driven by his desire to right the wrongs of the past, he'd finally figured out what he needed.

He needed Hermione.

It was strange how far they'd come these last few months. In school he'd belittled her and abused her, but underneath all that he'd always felt… something. There had always been something there, simmering beneath the surface of his hatred and his jealousy. He'd certainly never been apathetic towards the witch. And just as Draco was certain that Hermione herself had been immune to him in those younger years, he was just as certain that he'd been suffering a serious case of denial. When the first reports had appeared in the Prophet all those years ago claiming that she'd left England on the arm of Viktor Krum, he'd been inexplicably furious. And when she'd darted out from her hiding place behind a partition in his office, offering to marry him… he'd agreed far too quickly.

But now he was no longer prepared to withhold his feelings. Now he knew what it was like to have her in his life as a companion, as a friend, as a lover. And he wanted more.

There was also another side to it. She'd had such a hard life (he should know, he was partly responsible) and she'd fought so hard for so long. He hoped it didn't sound weird or arrogant, but he wanted to protect her, to take care of her and make sure she never had to struggle to make ends meet ever again. Then she could truly enjoy the benefits of exploring her full potential.

Draco reached up and smoothed his hair down self-consciously. He clutched the flowers closer to his chest and gave a quick glance to his reflection in the glass of a shop window. Not that she was likely to fall into his arms just because he was handsome. That wasn't her style. But it couldn't hurt.

Then, with one last calming breath, Draco began to make his way in the direction of Lavender Brown's apartment, hoping to find her still there with her friend. There had been no sign of Hermione at home and he was impatiently determined to start his new life with her as soon as possible.

Now that he'd made up his mind, he didn't want to waste a single minute. This was it. It was time to go and tell his wife that he was in love with her.

…

…

Hermione was watching her daughter play on the swings when she first felt the prickle on her neck that told her she wasn't alone. She'd brought Sophie down here to the playground once the little girl had woken up from her nap, finding peace in the simple act of watching the carefree smile on her daughter's face, hearing the sound of her laughter.

Looking up at her surroundings curiously, Hermione swivelled her head around until she noticed Draco approaching from the other side of the park. Her eyes widened and she felt her pulse quicken until she became almost faint with nerves as she watched him wave and stride towards her. Her gaze flickered down to the bouquet of gorgeous pink flowers he was carrying, and it caused something to clench painfully inside her chest.

"Hi," he greeted, a sheepish smile on his face and a slight blush to his cheeks.

"Hi," she replied slowly, unable to quite look him in the eye but not wanting to seem rude.

"You…er… disappeared on me this morning. I was worried."

And he looked worried too. He was shuffling his feet and kept shooting furtive glances up at her from beneath the strands of blond hair falling softly over his forehead.

"I'm sorry," she replied smoothly, knowing how important it would be to maintain her composure, "I had an appointment I couldn't miss."

Draco nodded, before glancing down at the flowers in his hand as if he just remembered he had them.

"Er…these…are for you."

"Thank you," she mumbled, taking them from him hesitantly and wishing that he hadn't turned up with such an obviously sweet gesture. They fell into an awkward silence then. She kept fiddling with the flowers she was holding and there was a heavy layer of tension in the air between them. Hermione swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. The last time they'd been together, Draco had run his lips down her neck and across her shoulders. He'd gripped her hips urgently in his hands. He'd held himself above her, an expression of almost agonised bliss on his face.

Hermione shook her head, blinking to rid herself of the images. By the look he was giving her now, she thought it was quite possible he was reliving the experience himself in vivid detail.

"DRACO!" Sophie's excited shout seemed to break them both out of their trance. She raced over from the play equipment nearby, launching herself into the blond wizard's arms at full speed.

"Oomf-" Draco spluttered, but recovered quickly, beaming down at the little girl suddenly burrowed in his arms. He knelt down until he was at her height and held her shoulders to speak to her.

"Are you ready to go, sweetie?"

"Yuhuh! Did you buy those for mummy?" she asked him, pointing to the flowers that Hermione was still clutching in one hand. He lowered his voice in a pretend whisper when he answered.

"Yes, I thought they looked pretty, just like her. What do you reckon?"

Sophie grinned toothily up at him.

"I think they're pretty too. And they're her favourite!" she whispered back as if they were having a secret conversation, even though Hermione could hear every word. Draco squeezed the little girl's shoulders gently.

"It's getting late, sweetie. Would you like some dinner?"

Sophie nodded vigorously.

"Oh yes please!"

"What should we eat? Its your pick," Draco asked her with a cute smile on his face. The little girl's eyes widened.

"I can pick anything?"

"Anything!" he replied recklessly, while Hermione was left standing on the outside feeling clumsy and anxious. She was hoping to make this clean and simple but now Draco was just sweeping in with his stupid romantic flowers and his questionable parenting skills. Sophie considered her choice very seriously for a few moments before a grin stole across her features.

"Noodles!"

Draco smiled and laughed.

"Noodles it is then!"

Sophie clapped and cheered as the wizard picked up her little yellow backpack and hoisted it up onto his shoulders. Seeing Draco Malfoy wearing a bumblebee themed children's bag on his back was strangely endearing, but Hermione had to immediately force that thought away. That was dangerous territory.

As they left the park together, Sophie skipped ahead, picking some wild daisies from along the side of the path, leaving the two of them wandering slowly behind her. Another awkward silence fell between them, broken after a few paces when Draco cleared his throat.

"I tried calling you earlier, but you didn't answer," Draco murmured, a pink flush on his cheeks. There was an implied question in his words, although Hermione wasn't sure what she could say in response. She'd been in the doctor's office earlier when she'd received a call from him on her muggle device. Of course she hadn't picked up. What was she supposed to say?

Sorry, Draco, can't talk! I'm hearing the worst news of my life right now because my treatment hasn't worked and I'm going to die sooner than I'd hoped...

Hermione stayed silent, frowning down at the pavement as Draco sighed next to her.

"I was hoping we could… talk," he continued when she remained silent. Hermione's stomach clenched tightly and she let out a long breath.

"I don't really have anything to say," she answered quietly after a long pause. Draco blinked at her in concern before returning his gaze to the pavement that Sophie was hopping along, making sure to avoid any cracks.

"Hermione-"

Suddenly she was petrified of whatever was about to come out of his mouth. If it was another declaration of love she didn't know what she'd do. And he deserved so much better than a half-life spent caring for a dying witch.

"Last night was a mistake," she blurted out in a panic, though her voice was quiet to avoid alerting Sophie to their conversation. "We shouldn't have… done what we did."

Draco turned his head to stare at her, partly in hurt disbelief and partly in longing.

"It wasn't a mistake for me," he declared softly, his silvery eyes filled with an intense sincerity she couldn't doubt. He continued, "and I know it wasn't a mistake for you either, Hermione."

She swallowed and turned away abruptly to watch her daughter skip along the edge of the path. When the little girl turned back to her, demanding that she watch her balance on the stones there, Hermione smiled and waved, trying to ignore the drumming in her chest. She went to stammer out some kind of response to the wizard, but before she could, Sophie had returned to them, taking her place right between the couple and grasping onto one hand of each with her own.

"I'm staaaarving!" the little girl complained and Hermione tried to push thoughts of what she had to do to the back of her mind, though her determination never waivered.

Draco deserves better, she kept reminding herself, knowing that tonight would have to end up being their one final dinner together as a family – a family that had been thrown together haphazardly in trying times, but a happy one nevertheless. All she wanted was for Draco to be happy.

After apparating closer to home, Draco ended up dragging them into a little hole in the wall Sichuan noodle joint that seemed incongruous with the surrounding neighbourhood and its seemingly endless sprawl of posh, white mansions. The smells wafting onto the street from the winding little staircase were mouth-watering, and he seemed quite friendly with the manager. It was… charming, actually, she thought. And as the waitress fussed over Sophie and got them seated, she wondered what it would have been like if she hadn't been sick. Would they have enjoyed many nights coming here together? Chatting and laughing, making puppy dog eyes at each other over their pan-fried dumplings while Sophie poked eagerly at her food with her chopsticks, a scowl on her face revealing how determined she was to master them.

Hermione blinked and stared down at her bowl. There weren't going to be any more nights like this.

But maybe… Hermione sighed. Maybe in the future, Draco would bring some other woman here. One who could give him everything he deserved. Someone kind and smart who truly cared about him and appreciated him. Someone who made him forget all the darkness he'd endured as a child. Who would heal him.

Because all Hermione would do was destroy him.

It was better this way. He could be angry at her and yell at her and nurse his broken heart for a few weeks. But he'd pull through, none the wiser. It was better than the alternative. Better than being saddled with a child he barely knew and sitting next to his wife's deathbed, waiting for her to take her last sorry breath…

She knew it wasn't entirely fair to him to keep him in the dark. She wasn't stupid. George and Lavender had both told her that she should be honest with him. Tell him the truth. Let him make up his own mind.

But they didn't understand. They didn't know everything he'd endured already. And they didn't feel the rotting sensation of guilt that had curled its way into her gut and wouldn't let go. Because she was already going to be abandoning a daughter to live alone in this hard, cruel world. She didn't want to leave behind a husband as well to grieve for her. Not when there wasn't even enough time for him to even really be her husband. Not anymore. If the potion had worked and had given her more time… maybe. But it hadn't.

"Eat up, slow poke!" Draco encouraged her with a wry smile over the top of his own bowl, "even Sophie's eaten more than you! Right, kid?"

Sophie nodded solemnly, her mouth smeared with hoisin.

"Uhuh!" she agreed, "I think Mummy eats even less than Shadow and Chess!"

"I think so too," Draco told her solemnly before throwing a wink in the little girl's direction, "speaking of which, your kittens told me they missed you while we were away!"

Sophie's eyes widened happily.

"I missed them too! I wish they could have come to the seaside with us."

"Maybe next time," he promised wryly.

The two of them chattered about nothing of significance for the rest of the meal while Hermione quietly attempted to eat more off her plate, although it was turning her stomach into knots. Finally they got up to leave and Draco casually paid the bill with a fifty-pound note as if it meant nothing, which to him it probably didn't.

The three of them made their way back to the house where Sophie was more than happy to get ready for bed after her tiring day. Fortunately Draco had to duck into his office for a while to tend to some business he'd missed while away. So Hermione went upstairs with her daughter, breathing a sigh of relief. Sophie tended to her kittens and played with them for a few minutes before changing into her pyjamas and brushing her teeth. Then she settled in under the covers, the two little creatures huddled up close to her in the crook of her knee.

Hermione sat on the edge of her bed, looking sadly around the room. It really was a beautiful house, and she would miss it dearly. She stroked her daughter's hair back off her forehead and smiled down at her. Sophie frowned in confusion.

"Where's granny? She usually gives me a goodnight kiss."

"Well…she told me this morning she's going to stay at the Bed and Breakfast for another few days and enjoy some alone time on the beach."

"Oh okay," the little girl pouted with disappointment. But then she perked up as she thought of their escapades that weekend. "Mummy, can we go to the seaside every weekend?"

"If we went every weekend you'd get sick of it!" she teased. Sophie thought about this and nodded with a serious expression.

"Maybe. Well then can we go every other weekend?"

Hermione laughed and tapped her on the nose.

"We'll see," she replied ambiguously.

"Draco says if I concentrate and practice, I can ride without training wheels soon!"

Her smile softened and she tugged the blankets tighter around Sophie's shoulder in a motherly gesture.

"If you work hard and have courage, you can accomplish anything, sweetie!" Hermione told her. She gave her daughter a gentle kiss on the forehead and stroked her hair once more, pushing it behind her ears.

"Goodnight mummy!"

"Sweet dreams. Say hello to the stars for me."

"And you say hello to the moon."

…

…

When Hermione went downstairs, she noticed a light coming from the library and approached it cautiously. This evening had been an arduous test of her nerves. But her resolve had not diminished.

Closing her eyes briefly and letting out a breath, Hermione grasped the door handle and pushed. It was already slightly ajar, and she could hear the tail end of Draco's conversation on the phone as he finished up with one of his executives. As she sidled anxiously into the room, he gave her a soft, welcoming smile and gestured for her to come closer. Hanging up his call, Draco stared at her as she approached, and she noticed him visibly swallowing. Hermione's stomach was rolling in waves too but for different reasons.

"I wish you'd woken me up before you left this morning. I wanted to…well…" Draco scratched at the back of his head, smiling sheepishly, "I was hoping we could talk."

"I already told you -"

"Don't, Hermione!" he interrupted, his tone turning intense as he stepped closer to her, "Don't say it was a mistake. We both know it wasn't."

She swallowed and blinked up at him. A small voice in the back of her mind told her that it wasn't too late. She could just tell him the truth.

But for what? Two or three months of hospital visits and him forced to nurse a dying wife?

"We can't, Draco-"

The wizard shook his head empathetically, stepping in very close to grasp her shoulders. His silvery eyes were locked with hers, something thrilling in his gaze that spoke of more than just desire.

"Hermione, listen to me. I know that we rushed things last night. And I'm sorry for that. I'd wanted you for so long and I wasn't exactly thinking with my brain…" he blushed and chewed on his bottom lip briefly, clearly getting swept up in the memory just as much if not more than she had been all day. "I'm not saying we have to jump into bed with each other again soon or anything. We can take it slowly and wait as much time as you like… but I think we should give this a shot."

"What do you mean?" she asked in a confused whisper, her voice coming out hoarse. Draco pushed his advantage, running his thumbs over her shoulders and up to where they joined the base of her neck, holding her there gently.

"For a long time I found myself regretting that this marriage only existed because of some charade, but it doesn't matter to me anymore how things started. I want this to be real, Hermione. I want us to be real. I want to call you my wife not because of some stupid contract, but because I love you and I'd do anything to have you stay with me for the rest of our lives. Just…please…" he paused then, his voice turning raspy as his grip on her tightened, "just stay with me. I promise I'll be good to you."

Hermione could barely stop herself from flinching at his words. He was asking her for forever and she couldn't even promise him a month, maybe not even a week if things suddenly turned south.

"Draco, I know you're a good man and you'll make a very good husband one day. Some witch is going to be…so… so lucky to be married to you. But we both agreed on the contract from the beginning. We both signed it. The terms are clear."

"Screw the terms," he hissed, looking appalled.

"It's not a matter we can just dismiss out of hand," she insisted, pushing on despite the trembling in her hands, "my side of the bargain has been met sooner than we anticipated, yes, and your mother can no longer be incarcerated again. But… your payments are only about half way through, and we'd already laid out a schedule for them."

He blinked at her in surprise as she began to squirm under his gaze uncomfortably. It was true though. She'd provided him with several accounts and trusts for payment and they'd agreed on a timetable for each of them, including the twenty thousand he would owe her in the event of a divorce. Everything was set up and ready to go, but had been spread out over the course of the year-long agreement in order to protect him in the event that she suddenly reneged on the deal. But Hermione was meticulous. She'd organised it in a way that every single knut would contribute purposefully to Sophie's future, from school fees to a trust account for any future education right down to a stipend set aside for Molly and Arthur to raise her in plenty of comfort and provide food and clothing for her. Any variation to the payment schedule would disrupt this plan.

"Hermione-" he choked out, staring at her in disbelief, "don't worry about the money, damnit! I'm asking you to be my wife."

"I…I…we had an agreement Draco. You promised me. I need that money."

Draco was looking at her like she'd gone crazy.

"You can have both! You'll get your bloody money if that's what you're really worried about!" his voice had gone up in volume and in anger just enough to make Hermione cringe, her nerves almost getting the better of her.

"I can't be in a relationship with you while you're paying me, Draco," she argued, tears finally pricking in her eyes as she started to lose the battle with her emotions.

"Why the hell not?"

"Because I'd feel cheap and I'd hate myself. What would you do, leave the money on the nightstand when we're done?"

She knew her words were cruel, and Draco looked at her with a slightly stunned expression.

"It wouldn't be like that," he argued, leaning in close and rubbing her arms consolingly, "you'd be my wife. Half of everything I own would be yours. Isn't that how it works?"

"Not in our case."

"The payment schedule wouldn't matter," he argued, "you could have whatever you want. You can take a million galleons for all I care. Ten million! You'd be entitled to all of it."

Hermione certainly couldn't deny that the thought held some appeal. Imagine what she could provide for her daughter if she had access to the whole Malfoy fortune. But it still somehow felt wrong.

"It still sounds like you'd be paying me to be your wife," she pointed out.

"But I don't give a shit about the money!"

"That's because you've always had money. You don't know what it's like to be reliant on others or not be able to make ends meet. It matters to me."

"I could pay you what I owe you right now, every knut and sickle!" he pleaded, "then we could start fresh with no obligations."

"It wouldn't be right, Draco," she told him softly, a couple of tears spilling out now as she closed her eyes against them, lowering her head, "I…I don't…"

Hermione took a deep breath, knowing what she had to do. What she'd promised herself she'd do.

He deserves better.

She opened her eyes and stared up at him, trying to assume an air of composure.

"I just want the money we agreed upon from the beginning. I don't… I don't feel the same way you do. And it would be wrong to take advantage of your feelings."

The silence that fell between them in that moment was terrible. Draco's face had scrunched up into such a pained expression that she couldn't bear to look at him, but made herself meet his eye anyway. She needed him to believe her. Even if it was all a lie. She felt his hands trembling where they held onto her upper arms. He opened his mouth as if to speak a few times, before choking back the words. Eventually he shook his head and looked beseechingly into her eyes.

"Why are you saying this?" he asked, "I may not have much experience with relationships, but I know I wasn't imagining this… this thing between us."

"You're my friend, Draco-"

He looked disgusted by the word, as though it were something filthy.

"Friend? Do you always treat your friends the way you did last night?"

She could tell he instantly regretted the words as soon as he'd said them, because he blanched and turned even whiter than usual.

"That's not fair-"

"I know, I'm sorry," he muttered, his expression stricken, "I didn't mean that. I just… I thought we wanted each other. Last night was…was…"

Hermione nodded, reaching down to clasp their hands together. She was worried her arms and shoulders were going to bruise if he kept holding onto her so firmly, not that he was probably aware of it.

"I know. It was certainly… nice. But this is why I told you it was a mistake. Because I shouldn't have allowed it to happen when it meant more to you than it did to me."

"Nice? It was nice? That's it?" Draco asked, wrenching one hand away and running it through his hair in aggravation until it stuck up messily in all directions. "I don't believe you," he spat, his remaining hand twitching in hers and starting to feel a little clammy, "Something's happened."

"What?" her heart skipped at the comment.

"What happened, Hermione? What's changed? Because what you're saying is absurd. Do you think I'm stupid? I know what I felt. What we both felt."

Hermione sighed, reaching for one more idea and hoping it would work.

"I think we just… got caught up in our roles. We got swept up in the whole game of pretending to be in love and it confused us. "

"Hermione-"

"I think maybe there's been a misunderstanding," she pushed, "and we both got so good at acting that we forgot it wasn't… real."

"Not real? Hermione-" Draco tore his grasp away from hers, lifting his hands up to cradle her face. His steely grey gaze was so intense she almost couldn't breathe, "Look me in the eye and tell me you didn't mean it. That you didn't feel something real for me."

You're going to hate me, she thought darkly, but then you'll meet a nice witch who can give you everything you deserve. Sophie can settle in with her new family with enough money to provide for her future and not feel torn between her new parents and the father she's left behind. And I can cause grief to as few people as humanly possible when I go.

"I don't feel the same way," she told him quietly, seriously, "I think we should follow our original plan and, once the payments are finished, we should file for divorce and move on with our lives."

Draco let go of her face as if he'd been burned. He took a step back, pressing a fist to his chest as though he were in terrible pain. His knuckles were white and his hand shaking.

"But that's only a couple of months-" he started, a red tinge blossoming around his eyes as they turned glassy.

"I know. As long as we keep up appearances for the ministry, I can move out if it's too… uncomfortable or awkward."

"Move out? Hermione… you can't be serious."

"I'm grateful for everything you've done. Really I am," she told him as gently as she could, "you're a wonderful man, Draco, truly. Just not the right one for me."

Draco spun around and strode a few steps away, his hands buried in his hair. She could hear him breathing heavily and they remained silent that way for several long, tense moments. Looking down she saw her hands shaking and there was a thin sheen of sweat forming on her forehead. When the atmosphere became too unbearable, she shuffled her feet and cleared her throat.

"I'll move back to my own room tonight. Then tomorrow we'll pack our things…" she began in a hushed voice, turning to make her way back out of the room. She wasn't expecting Draco to curse and stride after her. He grabbed her arm, spinning her around to face him, and the look of anguish on his face made her stomach plummet.

"Tell me what happened," he murmured desperately, "did my mother say something to you? Or… or is there someone else?"

Hermione shook her head, slowly extracting her arm from his grip.

"No, Draco. I just don't want either of us to get confused by continuing to play pretend. So let me be clear…" she took a deep breath and gathered her composure even though her bottom lip was quivering with the desire to burst into tears, "I have no intention of changing the nature of our contract. I'm sorry I gave that impression last night, but I don't want it to go any further. As I said, it was a mistake. I…um… I really am sorry."

Draco seemed to give up then, staggering back and looking as defeated as she'd ever seen him. His face was screwed up in pained disbelief and he was clearly trying to get control over his breathing. Hermione couldn't take it any more. Twisting away, she fled from the room and from him. He probably didn't even notice; his eyes had turned slightly glazed and sightless as he stared at an invisible spot on the wall.

Racing upstairs, Hermione managed to maintain her self-control until she'd finally shut the door to her original bedroom; the one she'd moved into when they first got married.

Resting her back against the door, she slid down until she was crumpled on the floor behind it. Burying her head in her knees, Hermione let out the sob she'd been holding in all this time and allowed the guilt and regret to finally overwhelm her. And that's where she stayed for the next hour, sobbing on the bedroom floor as she mourned the loss of Draco's love.

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Cue the angry reviews… :)