Carnifex Abbey
April 1, 2005
The sun had risen, the bright blinding light catching Riku off guard as he sat up from the bed. Making a visor of his own left hand, the man made quick hate to close the curtains to the master bedroom and let himself adjust. Looking around, the only other person in bed was his expectant wife, still asleep and snoring loudly.
"Hmm, Sora must've spent the night with his brothers and Axel. Oh well, what are ya gonna do?"
Gently, Riku nudged Kairi's shoulders to try and wake her up, only eliciting a sheepish response of "Sleep in" and "so tired". Figuring that Kairi was still tired and stressed out from the past few nights, he decided it'd be best to just let his wife sleep in for the day and get some well-earned rest.
"Well, if you need me, I'll be in the kitchen getting some breakfast and maybe hit the game room too. Sebastian said it's just down the first floor hallway next to the dining room and the game room is at the very end of that very same hallway and it's the door on the left. Sleep well."
"Mmmh...okay..."
Not one second after her response, Kairi immediately crashed and began to snore once more. He was honestly surprised his wife fell asleep that quick, but he figured the stress wore her out and seeing as she was in the early stages of pregnancy, she probably needed to get some more rest anyway. Riku smiled, took a quick four-minute shower and slid on his Sisters of Mercy T-shirt that was three sizes too large for him as well as a pair of blue boxer shorts and white socks before heading on downstairs to the kitchen.
He had to admit, the kitchen was really nice and larger than he expected. There was a large island-style prep table, a microwave, oven, toaster, several stainless steel pantries and a matching fridge plus the floor was done in a nice black and white chessboard tile pattern that he always liked the look of. Opening the fridge, he looked for something for breakfast...
"Hmm, let's see what we got to drink. There's milk, brandy, soda, some purple stuff...Alright, Sunny D!"
Immediately, Riku grabbed the bottle of Sunny Delight and poured himself a glass. Deciding to chase that with a can of Mountain Dew he saw in the same fridge, he then got some graham crackers from the pantry for a quick snack. But he noticed something strange next to the box of crackers in that same pantry. A white pill bottle and a bag of gummies."
"Hmm, Uncle Vladimir probably left these in here. What are they, some kind of vitamins? NoDoz? What is that, some kind of fancy brand of vitamins from Europe? I guess when you're a billionaire, Centrum is too plebeian."
Deciding to open a second can of Mountain Dew to take the pill with, Riku then opened the bag of gummies and ate three or four of them. Had he paid attention to the label, he would know they weren't your usual gummy bears or anything like that. They were a lot stronger than that. Turning the bag around, his eyes opened wide at the label.
"Flintstones Chewable Amphetamine? I didn't even know that was a thing! You'd think the failure of Flintstones Chewable Morphine would get them to learn their lesson! When will those sick bastards at Johnson & Johnson learn!"
Soon, Riku felt a weird euphoric sensation and he felt very energetic. The young aristocrat-in-training was manic as fuck and had a pep in his step as he decided to walk down to the game room. He had to admit, Vladimir knew how to party.
The game room was cozy looking, with smooth polished hardwood floors, wood panel walls, three round tables and six sturdy plush chairs, two for each table. There were also two pool tables, a digital jukebox, a large TV with a PS2 and plenty of other consoles, a dartboard, a bar with all sorts of fine liquor brands, anime and horror movie posters on the walls, and five mint-condition arcade machines for CarnEvil, Tekken 5, Super Street Fighter II Turbo, and Lethal Enforcers II.
On one of the tables, Riku saw a pair of Ray Ban aviator shades and a cordless microphone that seemed to be out of batteries. Looking at the sunglasses and microphone on the table and then looking at the jukebox, the currently tweaked out young man got an idea...
Soon, he found a song he always liked and set it to play before putting on a pair of sunglasses and intentionally sliding across the floor in his socks...
I want my...
I want my MTV...
Raising up the microphone, he began to dance and shake to the rhythm of the opening guitar riffs and sing...
Now look at them yo-yo's, that's the way you do it
You play the guitar on the MTV
That ain't workin'. that's the way you do it
Money for nothing and your chicks for free
Now that ain't workin, these guys ain't dumb
Maybe you get a blister on your finger
Maybe you get a blister thumb
We got to install some microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We got to move these refrigerators
We got to move these color TV's
Now look here people, listen to my story
A little story about a man named Jed
You know something? That poor mountaineer
They say he barely kept his family fed
Now let me tell you, one day he was shooting
Old Jed was shooting at some food
When all of a sudden right up from the ground there
Well, there came a bubbling crude
Oil that is, well maybe you call it
Black Gold or Texas Tea
He gonna move next to Mr. Drysdale
And be a Beverly Hillbilly!
We got to install these microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We got to move these refrigerators
We got to move these color TV's
Riku was now prancing around in a state of joyful mania in his oversized Sisters of Mercy T-Shirt, newfound shades, and boxers as he had the time of his life that morning, not even caring he was mixing up the lyrics to the song with those of the Weird Al parody version.
Off in his own little world and moving to the groove of the music, he did not notice the footsteps approaching and it wasn't until the music stopped that he heard someone enter the game room.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!?"
This wasn't going to be good...