24
Renee couldn't take it anymore, not knowing. There was still at least an hour of sunlight left, but the young blonde snuck out of Grimmauld Place following the closing of her café for the day, where she'd sat with the Auror Moody and his new contact, where they'd sat over God knew how many cups of coffee, and Renee and Sirius had joined the pair and demolished at least two more of Renee's chocolate muffins that her place was getting kind of famous for, though Cate Greengrass wasn't able to tell them much.
At least, nothing about her former patron that Renee didn't already know for herself. That he was a creep. Frustrated, they'd called it a night when they were getting nowhere as to figuring out where his safe house might be, and Cate had gone back with Moody, and Sirius had escorted Renee back to his parents' house, and now…here she was, outside.
Alone. On her own, amazed she'd been able to give Black the slip and ran towards the side streets and ducked behind the alleyways, hellbent on reaching her and Billy's flat as if she had only five minutes left to diffuse a bomb. She all but ran around the corner and collided into something much taller and firmer than she was.
Fully expecting an angry outburst and a brawl to break out, Renee flinched and stumbled backward to see a towering figure standing tall over her, somewhat shabby in appearance, with a heavily scarred face, though kind light brown eyes that twinkled as Remus Lupin gave Renee a once-over, assessing her figure.
"Miss Barreau. Are you all right? You might want to take better care where you step the next time," Remus Lupin murmured in a kind voice with just a hint of annoyance that the young woman had seemingly not been watching where she was going, though judging by the look on his face, he didn't seem too upset, which was good.
"F—forgive me, Mr. Lupin, I'm sorry!" Renee coughed, a light blush speckling along her cheeks, though she breathed out a sigh of relief as he reached out an arm and steadied her by the shoulders to prevent her from falling over. "I didn't see you! I—I wasn't watching where I was going," she squeaked in a breathless voice.
Lupin smiled at her, though his brows furrowed together in a cautious frown and his contemplative expression only intensified when Tonks joined her husband by his side, their newborn baby in a sling slung around her front, and Renee couldn't help the tiny smile that tugged the edges of her mouth upward in a tiny grin as the baby's hair began to change color.
"Does it do that a lot? H—his hair," Renee asked in spite of herself, momentarily distracted from her goal of reaching her home, not sure if what she was asking the proud new parents was an offensive question or not, but the query tumbled unchecked from her lips before she could stop herself, and to her relief, they smiled.
"It does. He takes after me in that regard, but I think he's like his father," the woman called Tonks piped up, shooting Renee a kind white smile before craning her neck upward to look at Lupin.
Her smile faltered slightly, but only for a moment, and none was more surprised than Renee was when the young, pink-haired witch extended her arm and held out her hand for the young blonde to take.
"You helped me tremendously, Miss Barreau. Without your testimony, I'd still be locked up in Azkaban. I owe you one someday. I only hope that you'll let me repay the favor, Renee," Tonks said in a somber, grim tone.
Renee shook her head and brushed away the witch's comment with an airy wave of her hand.
"It's nothing. You don't owe me anything, Mrs. Lupin. I—I was happy to help. Anybody else in their right mind would have done the same thing. I hope," she sighed.
It did not escape Tonks' and Lupin's attentions the nervous, skittish demeanor of the young Muggle's attitude, her shift in countenance as she looked over her shoulder and cast a strangely longing glance at the street in front of her. Tonks was the first to speak up.
"Is something wrong?" she asked, a measure of solemnity softening her features. Tonks glanced to the left and right, as though looking for something, though in this case, Renee knew that the 'something' was actually a 'someone,' and her suspicions were confirmed when she spoke up. "Where is Sirius?" she pressed on, her frown deepening as she swiveled her head back around and furrowed her brows. "We thought he would be with you. Has something happened?" she urged, her tone demanding but not necessarily unkind, though it was more than enough to elicit a light pink blush to speckle along Renee's face.
If it was at all possible, the young blonde woman's blush deepened, and she actively avoided their gazes.
"Ah, well, he doesn't know that I'm out here." Sensing their growing looks of disapproval, Renee blanched and immediately began trying to correct herself. "Please don't tell him. He—your friend, he is a kind man, with a good, good heart, but…I have to know."
As if to emphasize her point, she looked towards the street in front of her, having to stand on her tiptoes and peer over Tonks's shoulder in order to see it better.
"I have to know if Billy's all right. Just for a moment, and then I promise to come back, you lot. I—I can't stand not knowing if…if something is…"
Wrong, is what she wanted to say, but she couldn't. But her voice cracked as it trailed off and Renee didn't bother to finish her sentence. She couldn't.
Lupin inclined his head, saying nothing, his light brown eyes understanding of her plight, but no less troubled.
Renee had heard from Sirius that his best mate was actually a werewolf and that he had trouble maintaining steady work due to the nature of his condition a few times a month, but with the invention of a particular kind of potion, his transformations were quite safe, as long as he took them accordingly and never forgot a dosage, for if he missed one, the entire potion was rendered ineffective and utterly useless.
Lowering his voice, Remus leaned forward and moved to place a gentle but firm hand on her shoulder.
"Would you like my wife and I to go with you? We won't come inside, we'll just stand outside."
Renee shook her head, drawing in a calming breath and tried her hardest to fight off the wave of embarrassment that currently threatened to engulf her. "Ah, no thank you, Mr. and Mrs. Lupin. You two should go on ahead. It's getting late. I will be just fine. I can handle myself."
Tonks exchanged a dark look with Remus. "There's nothing wrong with caution, Renee, especially considering your unique circumstances," she advised, seemingly not convinced of the blonde's response. "Are you sure you don't want us there? We could provide protection. You don't know what he's like," she began, though she could tell by the look of determination and resolve that was set as stone in the young woman's features, that there was no changing her mind.
She wanted to check on her brother, alone.
"No, thank you," Renee murmured hurriedly under her breath, and before either Remus or Tonks could stop her, she darted out from behind them and sped off towards the street, where her flat's complex was. "I won't be long, only a couple of minutes. Then I promise to come back. Maybe when I get back you two could sit down with Sirius and I and teach me how to play this wizard's chess. I've never played a game where the pieces move of their own accord and can talk to you," Renee called over her shoulder.
Tonks nodded, unable to quell the sudden swooping sensation in the pit of her stomach as she and Lupin watched the young Muggle woman leave, turning her words over in her mind. Since when did she start making plans on behalf of her and her cousin?
The young witch gave her head a curt shake to clear it, her attention was momentarily drawn away by the sound of baby Teddy's coos and giggles. She smiled and turned towards Remus.
"That girl is in love, Remus, believe it or not," Tonks murmured quietly to Lupin under her breath as they reluctantly turned around and made to head towards their Headquarters.
Lupin quirked a questioning brow at his wife, a look of incredulity and disbelief etched on his lined and scarred features. "With?" he pressed, feigning ignorance, though Remus was quite an observant man and not a fool. He knew better and judging by the look that Tonks currently shot him, he knew it as well, too.
"Sirius," was all Tonks answered pointedly in a matter-of-fact manner as she shrugged her shoulders. "I can see it in her eyes, Remus. She cares for him, whether she knows this or not."
Lupin nodded in understanding, knowing exactly who Tonks was referring to, just by the intonation of her voice. Admittedly, he was surprised by this inference of his wife, but he trusted Dora's input more than anyone else he knew, aside from Sirius's, of course.
"How do you know? Did she say something to you? Has she told you as much?" he asked, pulling Tonks close and allowing his wife to rest her head against the crook of his shoulder.
"No. No, she didn't need to say anything, Remus. It's in the way she speaks about him, and…it's in her eyes," Tonks murmured thoughtfully, keeping her gaze fixated on Renee Barreau's retreating form, until the blonde slipped out of their line of sight. "There's…something there, I can just tell, Remus…I wonder if Sirius is aware of this…"
Lupin merely grunted wordlessly in response, instead opting to sling his arm around his wife's shoulder, though they made no move to head back to Grimmauld Place, neither one wanting to head for Sirius's place until they saw the blonde round the corner again and that they knew Barreau was safe and could escort her back.
Sirius would have their heads if the two of them allowed Renee Barreau to traverse the streets of London alone with a killer on the loose. Though he let out a light little chuckle when he recollected the look in the Muggle woman's eyes as she too, gave them the slip and headed for her home.
When she had called out to him and Dora over her shoulder, there had indeed been something there, as his wife had said, a glimmer in the young woman's bright blue eyes that lit up her entire face the second Sirius's name had been mentioned.
How she smiled… As the pair stood in wait, waiting for Renee Barreau to come back around the corner, not trusting her to walk back to Grimmauld Place alone, for one, she wouldn't be able to find it given the layer of protective enchantments surrounding the place, and two, the fact reminded that they still had a serial killer on the loose, Lupin considered the look again in her eyes, and wondered if he should tell Tonks that Renee had more than figured it out by now, but had Sirius?
"What about—" Remus started to ask, but almost as if on cue, the sound of a shout, more like a harsh bark, an animalistic noise rent the otherwise silent night air around them, and Lupin did not bother to stifle his arm as Sirius himself rounded the corner, looking thoroughly agitated, his dark hair disheveled.
"WHERE IS SHE?" he bellowed, his roar practically echoing and reverberating off the walls of the brick building they rested against, and Sirius blanched the moment baby Teddy started to cry in response and Tonks and Lupin shot him withering looks. "Sorry," he grumbled, carding his fingers through his thick tuft of dark hair in a voice that did not sound sorry at all. "But she—she's disappeared! Gods be damned, Merlin damn that woman, she'll drive me nuts!"
Remus quickly molded his features into one of impassive indifference.
"Just take a moment to calm yourself, Sirius. Sirius, calm down and take a deep breath. Who's disappeared? Who? Whom?" he asked in a nonchalant, casual voice that betrayed none of his amusement, though he knew Sirius saw it in his eyes.
The edges of Black's lips curled up and he brushed a lock of dark hair out of his eyes as he snarled, though Tonks and Lupin remained unfazed by the man's growls.
"Renee! Don't play dumb with me, Moony, you've always been a horrible liar, so don't bloody start this!" Sirius bellowed, losing the last vestiges of his patience as he tugged on a lock of his dark hair that had been previously pulled back in a low ponytail. "Where the hell is she?"
Tonks shot him an angry look as she shifted Teddy in the sling and did her best to soothe their now-crying son.
"Remus, please, will you take him somewhere else so I can try to calm Teddy down and get him back to sleep?" she begged, gesturing with a mad wave of his arm towards Sirius, who was now restlessly pacing the sidewalk in front of him, seizing on tufts of his hair.
He looked quite livid. Sirius's head whiplashed sharply upwards and his pale face drained of all colors.
Sirius, known for his impatience, turned around in frustration before facing his best mate and his wife, pointing his finger accusingly at Remus as he gritted his teeth in anger, whisper hissing his words to Lupin.
"I know you know something, Moony," growled Sirius, his gaze unwavering as his dark hair was swept up by the tumultuous gust of wind that swept through the side streets of downtown London. "And if you care to keep your tongue in your mouth, tell me where she is," he snarled in a low, threatening voice, almost a growl as he throttled his urge to roar like an enraged dragon as his gaze narrowed as he glared at Remus. "Right now, or I swear I'll—"
"You like her." Tonks' statement cut through whatever threat Sirius had been about to make to his best friend, which was enough to inspire response from the man and catch him off guard.
"What?" snapped Sirius angrily the moment he felt his pale gray eyes widen in shock as his mind processed his baby cousin's words. "That's—no, I—I don't…" he stammered and spluttered like a madman trying to find his words, though after a few moments of this and being on the receiving end of a particularly admonishing look from both Lupin and Tonks, he felt something shift within himself and his shoulders slump forward in a sense of defeat.
Tonks merely smiled serenely back at her cousin as Sirius lifted his gaze to stare at the pair rather nervously, suddenly not sure what it was that he wanted of them, other than for Moony and Dora to tell him where Barreau had gone.
"Ignore Tonks, Sirius. She is romantic in nature and assumed over the nature of your…connection with Miss Barreau," Remus said hastily, sensing the worst of Sirius's temper swelling as he stepped forward in hope of rectifying the mess that Sirius got himself into.
"Apology accepted," grumbled Sirius quickly before turning his gaze towards Tonks. What he really wanted, he supposed, was a witch's input, a woman's advice for the question he was about to ask. "I don't think Barreau likes me, Tonks."
His voice was even rougher and coarser than usual as Sirius closed his eyes, grimacing as Black couldn't help but wonder if he was making a huge mistake in confiding his dark little secret.
"You don't know that, Sirius," Remus replied warmly, and Sirius supposed he ought to be grateful the man had chosen to overlook the fact that he had essentially more or less just yelled at him in demanding to know where Renee was.
"I do," he growled, baring his teeth in an animalistic, almost dog-like snarl. "I know how Barreau feels. She doesn't like me. No, it's more than that. She despises me for what I am. She—"
"How do you know, Black?" Tonks asked. "Has she told you that she despises you, that she hates you?" she continued, her voice plain, as though she were a St. Mungo's Healer trying to diagnose her cousin with some form of illness.
"…No…" replied Sirius begrudgingly after a long and somewhat awkward pause. "She hasn't."
"Then you don't know. Not until you ask her," Tonks pointed out in a matter-of-fact tone that was so blatantly obvious that Sirius, in his frustration over what to do about his problem, wished for a moment he could hex it off her.
Her voice was insufferably positive, and Sirius did not know what to make of the change.
"What?" blurted out the former prisoner of Azkaban, lifting his head to look bleary-eyed at Tonks, who was walking towards Sirius slowly. He looked to Moony for confirmation, who nodded. Their roles were reversed now. Remus seemed to be the one who was now being utterly entertained to watch Sirius slowly descend into misery, and all over a single young woman, yes.
"Ask her." Tonks repeated slowly, smiling kindly towards her. Sirius furrowed his brows and raised them in alarm, unable to tell if his cousin was being genuine or spurning him on.
"Th—that's not really an option for me, Tonks," Sirius began to say slowly, his voice hoarse before he blushed and looked down at the cracked sidewalk beneath his boots in shame.
He knew what Moony and Dora were thinking, without even having to meet their gazes. 'Coward', probably. He can't even talk to her. And they would be right in that regard, yes.
"Be honest with Barreau. I promise it will help," Tonks chirped brightly, flashing Sirius a white smile that the forlorn man did not return.
Remus was looking contemplative and thoughtful, and unusually quiet. Well, more quiet than usual, which for him, spoke volumes.
"Why the sudden lack of confidence, Sirius?" Remus questioned, furrowing his brows in thought as he rubbed the growing stubble along his jawline, wincing as he knew he needed to shave, and soon. "You never used to have any problems talking to women, in fact, you always got the women, and especially into your bed—"
Tonks stomped on Remus's foot as silently as she could while her cousin continued to stare miserably at a nearby crack in the wall of the building behind Tonks's head. Remus glowered at his wife with a confused expression on his face while his wife, in return, returned his stare.
"If I could give you a piece of advice, Black," Tonks replied calmly after a while, turning to face her cousin as though her husband had not just offered up a quip of his own as it pertained to Sirius's past dating history with the witches. "Don't try to hide your emotions. If you're nervous around her, then let Renee see it for herself. It will make her feel more comfortable around you if she sees you're as nervous as she's bound to be. We're very complicated, you know. Pleasing women takes practice, as well as charm."
She chose her words carefully, Sirius noted, wary and not wanting to offend him.
Sirius grunted wordlessly in response, and finally, he found his voice.
"It's the 'charm' aspect that seems to be becoming an issue for me, cousin," he replied gruffly, desperately wishing for Tonks to forget that he had been hanging onto her every uttered word just now. "Merlin knows why. It's never been an issue before until now," he confessed, swallowing.
"This woman, this Muggle girl, is…special, Sirius," Tonks murmured. "She isn't like everyone else, though I think you already know that. Look at how exceptionally well she reacted to…all of this," she added, gesturing with one of her arms in a flourish, referring to their magic. "She went out of her way to help secure my release from prison. For that, I owe her. If you want, I could speak to her on your behalf?"
She bit her bottom lip and waited for Sirius to respond and was not at all surprised when the stubborn man shook his head no in response to her offer, wanting to put him out of his misery.
"N—no, I will do it myself. Where did she go?" he questioned, looking to the left and right, as though half-hoping and expecting Renee Barreau would just round the corner and show herself, and then his secret would be a secret no more. He turned to look at Tonks and Remus.
"Her home. That way," Remus answered simply with a jerk of his head behind them.
"Thanks," Sirius answered gruffly, taking one last withering look at his best friend and his wife, quitting the scene and stalking off down the sidewalk towards Renee's flat, to try to do one of the hardest things he had ever to accomplish. As for the two of them, Tonks and Lupin turned towards each other, speechless about what had just transpired between them all.
Well, almost. The edges of Tonks' lips curled upward in a light, lilting little smirk.
"He likes her, doesn't he?" stammered Remus, his question not sounding like one at all, though he looked like he had just been doused in cold water. "I never thought I would see this day come for him. If he just really had to speak to her, he'd have no trouble telling Miss Barreau what he just told us. And he's never come to me for advice about matters like this," he breathed incredulously.
"I think it's more than that, sweetheart," Tonks replied gravely, her smile sliding off her face and her expression turning melancholy.
Lupin frowned and slowly turned to regard Tonks as he took both of her hands in his, before bringing her knuckles to his lips for a gentle kiss. "I don't understand. What do you mean?"
"I think that he already likes her in that way, or is starting to at least become aware of it for himself. Infatuation, maybe, at a minimum," Tonks explained, her expression now quite serious and forlorn. "And that spells trouble."
"Why?" Lupin demanded, leaning towards his wife with concern, leaning down to place a gentle brief kiss on Dora's forehead before doing the same to his newborn son. "Why is this bad?"
"Because he's never fallen in love with a woman before, at least, from what little you've told me about his…past, he tends to flit through women like used parchment paper. Or at least, he used to," Tonks whispered, referring to his womanizing ways in the past. "I'm afraid that this experience is going to change him, forever. But only time is going to tell if it's for the better or worse."