"We need to get back at Rita," Tonks states determinedly.

"Really? Because I definitely was going to let Rita get away with being a conniving bitch."

Tonks glares at Elena. "This is no time for your sarcasm."

"Sorry. What scheme is forming in that devilish mind of yours? Because I know there's something flitting through it."

An evil smirk spreads across Tonks's face. "How do you feel about making a potion to cause boils?"

Elena scrunches her nose. "That doesn't sound like a prank my best friend would come up with."

"You didn't let me finish. We'll also place a jinx on it to cause the boils to continuously change color. And the potion I'm thinking of will resist everything except for Murtlap, which only Madam Pomfrey has, to cure them."

And that's how the two girls find themselves the next evening meeting again in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. Elena is wearing the Invisibility Cloak, and Tonks, who is Morphed as Professor Sprout, is holding the Marauder's Map.

"You ready?" Tonks asks as she opens the Map.

Elena pulls the Cloak tighter around her. "As I'll ever be. Just remember the plan, Tonks."

"Right. And what was that again?" Tonks jokingly asks.

Elena rolls her eyes, but her chuckle gives her amusement away. "You're to get the bubotuber pus from the greenhouses and come back straight away so that you don't get caught." She fixes Tonks with a stern glare. "While you're doing that, I'll be sneaking into Snape's office to grab the other ingredients. Once we've both finished- without getting caught, I hope- we'll drop off the ingredients here and go back to our dormitories, and we'll make the potion Friday evening."

"Got it."

Tonks moves to leave, but Elena stops her. "Before you go, double-check that you have your Mirror so we can communicate if something goes wrong. Mine's in my pocket."

Tonks searches herself a moment before pulling out her own Mirror. "I have it. Now, let's go."

~3~

Elena walks as quietly as possible as she makes her way through the corridors of the dungeon. Despite the fact that Tonks and Phoenix think she's Snape's favorite student, she knows better- if she were, he wouldn't be as harsh to her as he is. So, she knows that if he were to catch her out after dark, she would be in a big heap of trouble- a bigger heap than if another professor caught her prowling around the school at night.

There's a sudden bark of frustration from somewhere ahead of her. She stops in her tracks, her breath bated. Not a moment later, Snape exits his classroom, wiping a hand down his face. He walks toward the door to his rooms, which is only a foot away from where Elena is standing, frozen in place.

Snape stops just in front of her. "Who is there? He asks as he looks around the silent and empty corridor.

Elena holds her breath, hoping and praying he doesn't find her.

Shaking his head, he passes by her and enters his rooms, the door closing loudly behind him.

Elena waits a couple of seconds before she deems it safe to resume her mission. She quietly makes her way over to Snape's office, which is across from the Potions classroom. Once in there, she makes quick work of grabbing the ingredients she needs. She magically sends them to Myrtle's bathroom so that she won't have to carry them back and risk Snape or someone else catching her with the stolen goods.

There's a sudden whoosh of air behind her, and before she can turn around, someone pulls her hood off. "Aha!"

Elena recognizes the familiar drawl, and she knows she's about to get the punishment of her lifetime. She slowly turns to face Snape, dreading his response, and already formulating an excuse in her mind.

Snape is seething with anger. "Miss Davies, how many times do I have to stress to you that it is dangerous for you to walk around this school alone?"

That was not what she was expecting him to say. Her carefully crafted lie dies on her lips, and she just stares at him, taken aback.

"You will spend the whole week with me in detention. Perhaps this will teach you to not jeopardize your safety."

Elena snaps back to herself. "Excuse me? What do you mean, jeopardize my safety? What aren't you telling me, sir?"

"Get back to your dormitory- right now."

Elena defiantly crosses her arms and stares him down. "Not until you tell me why my life is in danger, because it's painfully obvious there's something you're not telling me."

Snape levels her with a glare for a moment, then figuring she's going to win this battle of nerves, relents. "The Death Eaters are after you."

Elena stares up at him, wide-eyed. "You're kidding."

"I assure you that this is not a joke, Miss Davies. I have never- and will never- joke about anything this serious."

"Why would they be after me, of all people?"

"That is a mystery that you are not yet ready to learn."

He turns to walk away, but Elena isn't in the mood to let him get away without giving her the answers she's been seeking since she was attacked in her first year.

"Why. Are. They. After. Me?!" Elena all but shouts, resisting the urge to petulantly stomp her foot.

Snape faces her again. "You are not ready to know."

"It's my life that's in danger, not yours, so I have every right to know."

"I am not denying the fact that you have the right to know; I am merely telling you that you are not ready to learn the reason. Now go back to your dormitory, or you will serve a month's worth of detention with Argus for insubordination."

Elena huffs, crosses her arms, and stomps all the way back to Ravenclaw Tower.

~3~

When Elena finally gets back to the dormitory, she calls Tonks through her Mirror.

"Did you get caught by Snape? I saw he was in the office with you."

"No, I'm pretty sure he just figured it was Peeves being a nuisance and left," Elena lies easily.

"Peeves certainly would do something like that. Well, I'm glad you didn't get caught."

"Me too. Did you get what you needed to get without getting caught?"

Tonks smirks. "You bet your cute little arse I did. I dropped everything off in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom before I came back to my dormitory."

"Good."

"Anyway, we're going to make the potion Friday night, right?"

"Yup. And don't mention this again until then; I don't want anyone catching on to what we're doing. I don't want Rita to know what hit her."

"Just the way I like my prey- unaware."

~3~

They find themselves giggling and joking in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom a few nights later as they work on the potion.

"I bet you can't slip this into Rita's goblet without her noticing," Elena taunts as she adds the final ingredients into the cauldron.

Tonks quirks an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? What are we betting?"

"Loser has to wear heels for an entire day. With no Stability Charm."

"And what does the winner get?"

Elena bites her bottom lip as she thinks of something. "The winner gets the two chocolate frogs I currently have stashed in my trunk."

Tonks grins mischievously. "You're on, nerd girl."

The two girls shake hands, both convinced that they are going to be the one to win the bet.

~3~

"I can't believe you won the bet," Elena groans.

Tonks laughs loudly. "I can't believe the zits on Rita's face could get any bigger than they already were!"

"About the heels…."

"Don't try to weasel your way out of the bet, El. I won, fair and square."

Elena scowls. "Oh, alright. I'll bring the chocolate frogs to you during dinner, and I'll wear my heels tomorrow. Are you happy?"

Tonks grins wildly. "Elated is the better term."

~3~

With a groan, Elena climbs out of bed the next morning.

"You can't put off the day forever," Fifi states as she pulls on her sweater. "At some point, you're going to have to go down to breakfast in your heels."

Elena throws her head back in annoyance. "I hate it when you're right."

Fifi only rolls her eyes and heads out of the dormitory and, presumably, to the Great Hall.

Elena grabs her robes and pulls them on before she grudgingly makes her way to breakfast. She manages not to fall more than twice down the staircases and considers that a major accomplishment.

Tonks meets her at the doors of the Hall, smirking manically. "Those shoes make your arse look good."

Glaring at her, Elena growls, "I will get you back for this."

Tonks pats her mock-consolingly on the shoulder. "Sure you will, honey. Just keep telling yourself that."

The two make their way to their separate tables. However, as she's walking down the aisle to get to the spot Fifi has saved for her, one of Elena's heels catches on a stone, and she faceplants on the ground. Much to her embarrassment, everyone sees and starts laughing- well, everyone except for stoic Professor Snape. She gets up quickly, brushes the dirt from herself, and rushes to her seat as she tries to pretend like nothing happened.

"That was quite the entrance," Jen, a seventh-year, says, giggling quietly, before rejoining her conversation with some of the other seventh-years.

"I hate this."

Fifi rolls her eyes. "I would have more sympathy for you, but you're the one who gave the suggestion, so you brought this upon yourself."

Knowing her friend is right, Elena glares at her plate.

~3~

As she's walking to Potions with Fifi and Tonks after breakfast, Elena trips again just outside of the classroom. She manages to catch herself, but the books in her arms scatter across the floor. She throws her hands up in exasperation. "Great! I am never wearing heels again!"

Tonks just laughs as she crouches down to help Elena gather her books.

"Go on, Tonks. The bell is about to ring. Tell Snape I'll in class in a minute."

Tonks nods and stands up. "Now who's the klutz?"

Elena throws a book at her, but she's already in the classroom by the time it hits the wall. "You're an evil woman!"

Tonks sticks her head out of the doorway. "I know!"

Elena glares at the door before starting to pick up her books again, muttering darkly under her breath.

~3~

It is the week of Halloween at Hogwarts, and the excitement everyone is feeling seems to be radiating from the castle walls themselves. Well, except for the third years, who are about to have their required SexEd lesson today.

"You are actually kidding me right now!" Tonks exclaims as she sits down next to Elena at the Ravenclaw table. "I can't believe they're making us take SexEd with Snape. Of all the teachers in this damn school, why did it have to be him? This is going to be an absolute nightmare."

"A required nightmare at that," Fifi mutters.

Despite being upset with the whole thing herself, Elena forces a smile onto her face and says, "Just look on the bright side: we have to sit through an hour-long class talking about sex, and then we're done. Oh, and our first sanctioned Hogsmeade visit is this weekend, so we have that to look forward to."

Fifi and Tonks both groan their agreeance.

~3~

"All third-year students, please stay in the Great Hall," McGonagall calls as all of the other students begin to leave for their next period.

Elena catches a few of the older students laughing since they know what is about to happen. The younger students just walk past, none the wiser. Bill passes by the Ravenclaw table and wishes Elena and Fifi luck.

Once everyone except for the third years and Snape has left the Hall, the professor rids the room of the house tables and replaces them with single-person desks. Elena, Fifi, Tonks, and Charlie sit at four desks that are set into two rows, making a square.

"Students," Snape calls after everyone has taken a seat at the new tables. Elena can hear the reluctance in his voice and knows that this is the last thing he wants to be doing right now. "As you all well know, I will be teaching your Sexual Education class today. An hour-long class that is, unfortunately for all of us, required. Even though Hogwarts is a school for magic, we do not fail to realize that we house hormonal teenagers who want to experiment with sex. The subjects we will be covering today are abstinence, contraceptive spells, and the prevention of Sexually Transmitted Diseases, also known as STDs. Now, before we begin, keep these things in mind: one, the only reason I am teaching Sexual Education this year is because I drew the short straw; two, no asking questions that are not strictly related to what I am teaching. I will not hesitate to take away house points from anyone; and, finally, I will not be answering questions related to these topics once this lovely seminar is finished- that will be the job of your Head of House. Now that we have gotten all of that out of the way, let us begin.

"Abstinence: I will not say too much on the subject apart from that it is the safest way to avoid unwanted pregnancies and getting an STD." Snape seems to be staring right at Elena when he says, "Also, going along with that, if you do not feel comfortable giving away your virginity to a certain person, trust your instincts. Do not let someone pressure you into having sex, whether you are a virgin or not.

"Contraception: there are quite a few spells that can be used, and they are all found within the pamphlet you were given this morning by each of your Heads of House. If you do have sex and are not wanting to become pregnant at the time, do use these. They are the most effective way- aside from abstinence- to avoid an unwanted pregnancy. However, there are also quite a few contraceptive potions that can be taken after the act is performed, but these are much less effective than spells and can still result in pregnancy. Also, 'pulling out' is not going to prevent the sperm from entering the woman and fertilizing the egg."

Tonks's hand flies up. Snape looks at it with apprehension. "Is your question related to what we are discussing, Miss Tonks?"

"Yes, sir."

"Then you may ask."

"What does 'pulling out' mean?" Tonks asks with a straight, innocent face that suggests she truly doesn't know the answer. Elena, however, knows this isn't the case.

Fifi rolls her eyes, Elena covers her mouth to keep from laughing out loud, and Charlie nearly falls out of his chair, he's laughing so hard. Their reactions are reciprocated by the majority of the students- only a few look up curiously at Snape because they don't know the answer.

Snape groans and wipes a hand down his face. "It is when the man pulls out before he orgasms within the woman. Any more questions on that topic?"

Charlie's hand raises. Snape glares at him. "Yes, Mr. Weasley?"

"Have you ever 'pulled out'." The room erupts into laughter

"Twenty points from Gryffindor. Moving on. STDs: something you do not want to catch or spread. To prevent the spread of these, you need to use the same spells you will use for contraception. Any questions before you are dismissed?"

A deluge of hands raise. Snape barely suppresses his groan of annoyance.

~3~

They are dismissed shortly after that. Fifi, Tonks, and Elena head off to their Potions lesson after parting ways with Charlie.

"That was actually quite entertaining," Elena comments, still laughing slightly. "Props to you, Tonks, for asking that question about 'pulling out.'"

Tonks gives a quick bow as they continue to walk down to the dungeons. "Thank you, thank you. It was my pleasure."

"For the record, I do not condone humiliating Professor Snape like that- but I must say, it was quite humorous," Phoenix states.

A/N On the off chance that anyone reading this knows me personally, DON'T TELL ANYONE HOW DIRTY MY MIND ACTUALLY IS! Anywho, I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter!

As always, I would love to hear y'all's comments and theories! Until next time, my lovelies!