~ Chapter 24 ~

John couldn't believe his ears. Had Marlena just threatened to banish him from the penthouse over that quack, North?

"What did you just say?"

"You heard me. I said that if you can't put aside your vendetta against Alex, I'll have to ask you to move out."

"You can't be serious! You'd actually kick me out of our home because I refuse to play nice with your shrink?"

"Which part of this are you having trouble with, John? I'm tired of your hostility where Alex is concerned. I believe it's detrimental to my recovery. If you can't be supportive of our work then, yes, I want you gone."

"Sorry, Doc, but I'm not going anywhere. That guy has you so brainwashed, you have no idea what you're saying. I have to stay, if only to make sure he doesn't totally warp your mind."

Marlena's fury, which had been building the longer the conversation went on, reached a boiling point.

"I realize that I don't remember my past right now, but that does not make me an imbecile, or someone who's easily manipulated. I resent your implication that my thoughts are not my own, and that I couldn't have come to this decision without some trickery on Alex's part."

"But that's the only logical explanation. There's no way you'd be asking me to leave if he hadn't planted the idea in your head somewhere along the line. This is North talking, not you."

"Then you don't know me as well as you think you do. I am in full control of my faculties, and this is me talking. If anything, I'd say you're the one trying to force your opinions on me, as if I'm incapable of forming my own."

"That's not it at all," he protested. "I just want you to open your eyes and face the facts about this guy. He's not on the up and up, I'd stake my life on it."

"But you've already admitted that you have no facts to back up your accusations. As far as I'm concerned, they're baseless."

"Why won't you trust me on this?"

"I don't even know you! I don't remember the time we spent together, or the love you say we shared. You ask me to trust you, but all you keep doing is trying to undermine my trust in the one person who's made me feel safe and secure since I woke up in that hospital bed with no memories."

"How can you trust him and not me?! He came out of nowhere into your life, and you're willing to put your faith in him because… well, why, exactly?"

Marlena flashed back to the moment she had realized that Alex was her long-lost love. Not exactly information she was willing to disclose to John at this point.

"Like I keep telling you, he makes me feel safe. You, and Roman, and the rest of my family and friends keep pressuring me to be the person I used to be. It's incredibly stressful. Alex doesn't do that. He doesn't make any demands on me, and he doesn't make me feel guilty about not remembering fast enough. He doesn't expect anything from me."

"Of course, he doesn't make demands on you. He has no reason to want you to remember your past. I do. Our daughter does. Our friends do. Can you blame us for that? We want the old Marlena, the one who was so much a part of our lives. It's what we hope and pray for every day – the breakthrough that will bring you back to us."

"Do you hear yourself? What you're telling me is that I'm not okay the way I am. That unless I can retrieve my memories and become the old Marlena, you're unwilling to accept the person I am now."

Does she want me to think she's actually content to go on this way indefinitely?

John snorted in frustration and disbelief. He couldn't stand the fact that she had no memory of their life together, but it didn't appear to bother her in the slightest. He wrinkled his brow in concentration, trying to determine if this had been the case from the beginning, or if it was a recent change. Nope, this was new. North. It was all his doing. He had her convinced that it would be perfectly fine if she remained in her amnesiac state forever. The guy truly was a charlatan.

I have to get Marlena away from him, but how? She's more attached to him than ever.

"What do you expect from me?! I love you, but you have no feelings for me and no recollection of our time as husband and wife. That's a huge disappointment, and yet you stand there telling me that you prefer to be with Alex because he doesn't push you to remember. Seems to me that's a big part of the problem. Maybe if he pushed you harder, we'd be seeing some results by now," John shouted, his exasperation getting the better of him.

Marlena bit her lip to keep from screaming at John in return. The conversation was exhausting, and she was eager to end it. Once she'd managed to subdue her initial angry response, she scowled at the man before her, who remained, for all intents and purposes, a stranger.

"I don't want to discuss this any further. It's clear that you have no respect for Alex, or for the hard work we're putting in, day after day, trying to retrieve my lost memories. If you knew anything at all about amnesia, you'd realize that pushing me is the last thing Alex should be doing, and the fact that you even suggested it shows me just how selfish you're being about this entire situation."

John's jaw practically hit the floor at her words, and he couldn't help himself. He simply had to defend his position.

"How can you accuse me of being selfish? You've treated me like a stranger for months now, and I've barely complained. You've insisted on keeping North as your doctor, even though everyone around you thinks he's doing you more harm than good. I've done my best to abide by your wishes, and I've kept myself from throwing your shrink out on his no-good ass. I've done everything I know of to try to help you get your memory back, but you don't seem to appreciate any of it. If anyone is being selfish here, it's you."

He braced himself for an angry tirade in response, but none was forthcoming. Her eyes were emotionless as she stared at him, with no trace of love evident on her face.

"You're right, John. I am being selfish, because I have to be. It's the only way to make sure I can continue my treatment with Alex, and that's my one true hope of healing."

Before he could interrupt, she rushed on.

"I know you disagree about that, but it's not your call to make. I may still be your wife, but I'm my own person, and I can make my own decisions. Which I have. Alex is the only one I trust to help me regain my past, and I'll continue to work with him for as long as it takes."

Resistance was clearly futile. John sighed, as he attempted to marshal his final argument.

"Okay, you win. Keep having your sessions with North. But I'm not leaving you alone with him. God knows what he'll do to you if I'm not here to rein him in."

In her mind's eye, Marlena visualized herself in bed with Alex. She bent her head to hide the blush that was creeping up her cheeks.

There's lots I hope he'll do to me, and a chaperone will definitely spoil the mood.

When she faced John again, her gaze was steely and determined.

"This isn't up for debate. I want you to move out. Today."

"But, Doc…"

"I'll be perfectly safe with Alex, so I don't need you here as a watchdog. I'm positive that our sessions will proceed much more smoothly once there are no distractions. Now, please, pack your things and go."

He shrugged in resignation, knowing full well that there would be no dissuading her.

"I'm only a phone call away. If you need anything…"

"I know how to reach you."

John moved past Marlena and headed for the closet. He grabbed the nearest suitcase and stuffed an assortment of clothing into it, his choices barely registering as he struggled to hide his devastation. When he was done, he walked towards his wife to give her one last kiss, but thought better of it as he noticed her shrinking back from his approach. Regretfully, he changed course and made his way to the door.

"Goodbye, Doc."

"Goodbye, John."

As he descended the stairs, he glanced back at Marlena's room.

"I may be leaving, but I haven't given up on us. I'll fight for you," he pledged, as he slung his coat over his shoulders and strode towards the elevators.