Hi, so here is another chapter and my last of 2020. I wish you all a happy new year and a safe start to 2021. Here's to a better year.

Disclaimer-Nothing is mine.

Please Read and Review.

And some trigger warnings.

Anything in italics is in Djaq's language which is Arabic, my history of linguistics is not great but i think that is what it would have been. If anyone else knows anything different please let me know.

Faith Based Initiative

Chapter 10-And Dream Of Sheep.

Marian and Djaq are finally found, Matilda gets to work, there is a massacre of knights, a ghostly visitation appears, the boys wait desperately for news and Allan finds himself the bearer of gifts. Anything in italics is in Arabic for Djaq.

Djaq had been half asleep which she knew was a bad thing. Her head wound that she was sure had been leaking blood for a steady amount of time had stopped bleeding but it hurt like…well it hurt. She could feel the pull towards something that was surely pain free and she wanted to fight but if she was being honest, if she was being honest and truthful with herself she wanted to go. She was tired of fighting. It seemed for such a long time she'd been fighting to stay alive and now she was at the end of that fight.

And really what was there? Dignity had gone a long time before this, as she had told Marian all of her family were dead. Will…well he'd find someone else—and that was in the long shot of him having feelings for her which she did highly doubt. She would pass from this world in the dark but not in pain, not in childbirth or hard labour or torture. A pain free death. Not a terrible thing come to think of it.

She closed her eyes again and dreamt of the white walls of her house in Acre. It had been a long time since she had dreamed of that house at least not when the walls had been spattered with blood, the writing on the wall smeared and desecrated and the windows blown in. All her memories of her home had been about the bad times. She had never seemed to remember the good times. It appeared her sub-conscious had been saving them for now.

For her time of dying.

She saw her mother and father and her brother sat for midday meal. Her mother's dark hair caught underneath her headscarf as she chided Djaq for running around the house with his practice wooden sword. Gisella following her hair loose and curling always desperate to catch up with them, Saffiyah and Djaq who were always playing in the soft sand, the heat and the smells and the warmth of the candles. Bassam's birds cooing when visiting family was for pleasure and not for survival.

She felt something near her shift and she pulled herself out of the memories of the happier times and flicked her eyes open. She could see red, a lot of red and a face covered with a mask that reminded her of Marian as the Nightwatchman. Djaq stared her vision blurring sure she was seeing things as the red shape removed her mask and a wave of black hair fell out of the hood.

"You look like shit"

For a second Djaq was sure she was imagining things and then she realised the truth of the matter.

She was dead.

For Gisela was here.

She strained forwards a little as her eyes grew a fraction sharper and saw the face of her sister. She wondered if there was something after this life, Paradise and why if there was it had made Gisela older than she was. She looked to be in her twenties instead of the thirteen year old full of grief and anger she had been when Djaq had last seen her. She had not even had chance to hug her goodbye.

"Am I dead?"

"Close too I'd imagine. But I would not worry. Those blundering fools you call friends are here so you should live."

Djaq could hardly listen to the words she was straining everything she had to drink in what little she could see. Her headache was increasing and the dimness in her eyes was only making it harder. She was clinging with utter determination to the cliff that was keeping her alive and yet she could feel it slipping with each breath.

"Are you…are you really here…to take me to Paradise?"

Her sister, the image, the mirage or whatever it was cracked a laugh that was loud and threw her head back so the dark curls that her mother had loved to run her ivory brush through tumbled down the slim back.

"Me? Get to Paradise, you jest sister. The dead do not want either of us it seems. We cling to live like fleas within sand"

She bent down and Djaq got a look at her eyes. Out of the three of them Gisela had been the one to inherit their father's eyes but while her father had always looked at her with kindness there was cold, had steel in these eyes staring back at her. A hand reached out, the fingernails clean but the hand covered in callouses and marks and not the soft hands that her sister had once had.

Surely this had be a vision from the afterlife? She had heard of such things from soldiers in their dying moments on the battlefield who thought that they could see their wives, their mother's, their sweethearts in their final moments. Though why her brain was creating this hard and twisted version of her sister and not the safe and lovely child she had once been she could not think.

"Listen to me Saffiyah and listen well. You are going to live because the living are not done with you yet. One day your actions will catch up with you. But it will not be today."

There was another bang and Djaq thought she heard someone cry a name. The vision turned to look towards the cave opening and Djaq felt dried blood under her chin. Her sister flicked something silver up in the air and caught it with a low humourless chuckle.

"Robin"

That was Marian. She said it so feeble that Djaq could not hear her complete the word.

Her sister stood up and Djaq lurched forwards catching onto a bit of the red leather that made up the coat.

"Don't go" she said finally feeling wetness in her eyes though weather it was tears or blood she was not sure.

"Don't leave me sister, please."

There was another humourless chuckle.

"You left me first"

And then the red was gone. Djaq thought she saw boots disappear through the hole but she couldn't be sure. Actually she could not be sure of anything other than the shouting and the loud banging and honestly could a woman not get some peace in which to die? Surely death was not this noisy?

There was the sound of running footsteps and then…

"MARIAN!"

Was that Robin?

Oh it had to be Robin. Nobody else could bellow that loud.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph"

"Don't blaspheme Allan. Get me something to cut them down, John could you break the chains do you think or do we need something sharper to cut it with? I've never had to do this before. And the sooner we get them out of here and back to the camp the better I'd say"

Allan and Much where there. John too. What was this a rescue? Or was her mind creating visions of her friends to lull her to the afterlife?

She opened her eyes again and felt her cracked and dried lips force themselves into a smile.

Will.

He was bent over her, his hand on her neck and she could feel his fingers trembling a little. She stared at him, at the curve of his neck and the strong line of his jaw as he bent over her and she reached out with fumbling fingers to touch his arm.

Will jumped like he'd just ducked an arrow and looked at her. For a second the dark eyes fixated on her and Djaq even in her tired and emotional state could read the emotion that was hidden in them. She did not know what it meant, she did not want to know what it meant (not in this moment) but she knew that looking at him she was safe. It was Will. If there was a perfect embodiment of safety and security then it was Will Scarlett.

There was a pause as she lay there and Will stared at her those dark eyes overbright, she felt his thumb at her cheekbone and she fluttered her eyes shut.

It was alright now.

She was done.

And with that Djaq surrendered to the darkness.

Fortunately Matilda had been waiting. There had been so sight of the gir—Erin, her name was Erin, Allan reminded himself sternly but then again the back of the camp had a blanket covering it.

They had taken horses to the caves expecting to find some guards. There had been some but what had been surprising was that they were all dead.

Allan had looked at the wounds with the rest of the boys. The gashes were up close and personal, knee, stomach, neck and Allan knew it wasn't by sword that these men of the Sherriff's had died.

"Knife" Robin had said staring at one of the lines across the neck of a guard. "Two maybe, whoever did this knew what they were doing and they moved through them like a hot knife through butter."

"One person or two?" Will had asked.

"Two" Much had said from where he was looking next to his friend. "It's…I don't know, reminds me of something in the Crusade but I'm not sure what. I mean they had some fabulous knifework"

Robin had hummed. "Whomever it was didn't care about suffering or killing quickly. They just killed. Some have died instantly some have been bleeding for hours. It's almost…clinical in a way"

Allan decided to give the two of them ten seconds of remembrance of days gone by and then he spoke.

"Look I aint being funny, but shouldn't we be getting to Marian and Djaq. If what Erin said was true then their in pretty dire straits right now"

That had been enough to kick Robin into gear.

They had followed a long line of tunnels down to several caves. Allan gripping his sword tightly could understand why Marian's father had bloody banned children from going into this place. He and Tom had, had a long history of doing things that were forbidden to them but even he couldn't see his brother going into this place.

They spilt up in the usual pairings sans Djaq of course. Allan went with Will, Much with Robin and John on his own. They got to the first cave before they heard Robin cry Marian's name with so much agony in the tone that they both knew he had found her. Following the sound (and crashing into John halfway there) they came across what looked like a larger cave. Allan could see the hole in the sky that showed sunlight and knew that they had found where they had been kept hidden.

Marian he thought looked like a woman on the brink of death. She had clearly been beaten within an inch of her life though she seemed more awake than Djaq who was bleeding from a head wound and seemed to be half locked in her own private hell. He had to look away as he saw the third chain on the floor empty.

He turned on his heel leaving Much to search for a key and John to help and Robin and Will locked inside their own private hells as they looked down on the women that they loved. He had liked Djaq both romantically and then as a friend. He viewed Will as a brother as much as he had done Tom and so it was easy to admit that the two of them had bonded. Will deserved his happiness too and it was clear (to everyone but Will and John and Much no doubt—in fact perhaps even Robin) that he was in love with Djaq and him with her.

Actually perhaps the only people who did know about it was Marian and Allan which might explain a great deal because Marian was smarter than anyone he had ever met and he was…Allan.

And that came to Marian.

Allan did not have the same hero worship for her and her father and her dead mother that John and Will had done but he could admire any woman who could fend off Gisbourne and then kick his guards to the dust while wearing tighter pants than the man himself. And Edward…well…he could have handed Tom over to the Sherriff earlier and he had not. He could have blown their cover hundreds of times and he had not. And he had been prepared to die for his king. Regardless of what Allan privately thought of Richard he could admire Edward for his loyalty.

And then there was Erin. What he felt when he thought of the woman he was not entirely sure—feelings were not something that Allan dealt a lot in. But he found that he was thinking of her more than…well more than he should he knew that. He didn't know what it meant because happy endings were made for nobles like Marian and knights like Robin, they were not made for the likes of him. No matter how much one felt towards one battered woman who had looked up with no fear in her eyes and found the courage to do what a hundred men could not.

Survive.

There was a clap on his shoulder and he turned to see John his face oddly gentle.

"Matilda's right" was all Allan said. "The men who did this are filth"

John said nothing, just stared with that look that seemed to speak a hundred, thousand emotions within them.

"Come on Allan" he said gently. "Let's get the horses ready. We're going to have to ride fast"

And here they were, back at the camp.

Matilda had taken one look at Robin holding Marian and Will holding Djaq and had pressed her mouth into a very thin line again. She had whisked both of them behind the curtain and had said nothing other than instructions for Much to boil more tea and other things she would need.

It seemed like they were all statues waiting and then Allan remembered.

He and Robin had gone into town for the things that Matilda had needed and they had found a dress. They had been unsure of the size but Robin knew roughly what Marian's was and they had gone on that. they had chosen white dress with a blue flower pattern on it clinched by a tight belt a the waist, some worn brown leather boots and a cloak and the merchant recognising them but having sympathy had parcelled it all up in a piece of brown paper with string wrapped around it.

He picked it up feeling the weight of it all and then (as one really couldn't knock on the blanket) he called through the thin material.

"Matilda?"

Matilda peered round the curtain in such a way that Allan couldn't see past it which was probably what Matilda had known that he was doing.

"We got Erin the things you asked for if you could give them to her" he said finally. Matilda looked at the bundle and then back at him and her face softened considerably. She patted him on the cheek.

"You're a good lad Handsome" she said finally. "Go and tell Robin and William that there was no untoward touching with their woman. I'll be out as soon as I can assure no fever has taken"

It took Allan a second to understand what she was saying but when he did the curtain was back in place and he couldn't have interrupted her if he'd tried. In truth the woman scared him half to death.

He turned to see Robin still staring at the fire and Will sat on his bunk his knees to his chest. John who had been sat sharpening his stick caught his eye. Much turned the stew in the second pot counter clockwise.

"Matilda says neither Djaq, nor Marian have been raped" he said finally. There was no other way he thought to sugar coat the information and Allan found he did not want to. Will and Robin deserved the truth though why he had to be the one to carry the burden he really did not know.

Robin leaned back on his heels and Will shifted a little but Allan couldn't look either one of them in the face. He sat down on the edge of the little step that Will had carved out of a tree and picked up his sword intending to clean and sharpen the weapon just to have something to do. John caught his eyes and nodded his head and Allan shrugged feeling his muscles ache in response. It had been a long few days.

The Outlaws remained like that for a long time in silence. Each man was locked in his own thought, all thinking of the women they had either loved or grown close to or were captivated by. None of them spoke. There was no point.

There was nothing to say anyway.

They were waiting all of them, for the moment when Matilda would open that curtain and the aftermath would begin.

And there you are, i hope you enjoy and i will see you for the next chapter.

Next Chapter-Erin wakes up, Djaq and Marian wake up and a moment is shared. Everyone is filled in on the Black Knights-including Matilda who shares a moment with John and Erin gets her promise.