June 28, 1916
"I believe that is Dover in the distance," Dmitri Pavlovich said, squinting at the land in the distance.
Olga looked over the railing, seeing the familiar white limestone cliffs. They seemed to almost shine under the late afternoon sun. A feeling of nostalgia filled her being, as she remembered her previous visit to England eight years ago. She was only thirteen years of age that time. Although the visit had only lasted four days, she left England with a very good impression of the country, as the British royal family had been friendly to her family.
"Yes… the King of England agreed in advance to allow the Standart to pass, thanks to an early telegram to the British embassy. The embassy passed the message to King George V as expected," Olga said.
"Smart girl, always thinking ahead."
"Oh please, it is only common sense."
Dmitri laughed. "What is common sense to you seems intelligent to me."
"When one passes through the waters of a foreign country, he or she must have permission to do so..." Olga said, sighing.
"Alright, alright, Your Majesty. I was only um… complimenting you."
"Oh… thank you for the compliment. Now, I believe that we must check on Mashka and Nastya."
Dmitri chuckled. "You can never keep your eyes off of them for long."
Both Tsarina and her fiance got off of their chairs before they began to walk to the covered sections of the deck. Officers and seamen saluted the royal couple-to-be, and the Tsarina and her fiance nodded at them. Upon arriving at the covered deck outside of the ship dining area, Dmitri spotted Anastasia and Maria roller skating. His sister, Maria Pavlovna, was roller skating not far behind her younger cousins. The older woman wore a wide grin on her face, looking radiant in the sun.
"I think that was them, along with my elder sister," the Grand Duke said.
"I know, Mitya. I have not yet experienced marital activities and a relationship, but I cannot help but feel for her… to have hopes for a marriage only to be ruined by neglect," Olga said in a hushed voice.
"Considering that we will be married within five years, I hope that we will not have to experience such an issue."
"Marriage is a topic for a later time. Even then, it is not all that it is said to be... hardly the result of love, but practicality. If so, we will not need to concern ourselves with such agonies of the heart. I do not know what to think about that. Should I feel relieved or..."
Olga let the sentence, one that would not be finished, hang in the air. Her fiance kept silent for moments beside her, staring at the distant landmass.
"I am aware that such a union between us would not be bound by love, but by necessity. You need a consort as Empress of Russia, and the throne needs… well, heirs and heiresses."
It took great willpower of the Empress to not shudder. She hoped to have a family in the future, yet with a man she did not love? She could not accept that with ease even if she would remain Russian by blood. Also, her unmarred and chaste upbringing under her mother left her quite ignorant of marital relations and the specifics of wedding nights. She allowed the unpleasant thought to fade away in the depths of her mind. It was not yet time. Her duty to bear a successor to the throne would come later.
Besides a slight repulsion to the thought of an arranged marriage, Olga felt another feeling as her thoughts drifted to a distant dream that she desired since the tender age of seventeen. To have her hand resting in the hand of a certain junior officer while she walked down a red carpet-
"Nyet, that is only a fantasy, never to be, and sadly- never will be," she thought, looking down at her clenched hands.
"Are you feeling well?" Dmitri Pavlovich asked, placing a hand on his fiance's hands.
"Oh, yes… I must talk with Tatiana. Do enjoy your time with your sister, Mitya."
Dmitri was not all convinced that Olga was fine, but he nodded anyway. The Grand Duke left his fiance alone to search for his sister. Now in solitude, she made her way below deck. She went through various corridors and rooms until she reached a certain door with a familiar marking on it: Officer Quarters 2E. Behind the door, she could hear laughter. She could smell the familiar odor of lit cigars in the air, which made her wrinkle her nose. Mustering her courage, she knocked on the door. The Empress of Russia knew that it was improper for her to go below deck without an escort. Oh, forget propriety!
Olga knocked on the door, looking left and right in the corridor to ensure that she was alone. Footsteps could be heard approaching the door. It opened, and there stood Pavel Voronov in his uniform. An unfamiliar officer sat on the carpeted floor, holding cards in one hand.
"Olga- Your Majesty!" the unknown officer said, standing up to salute her.
The Empress nodded to allow the officer to sit down. Pavel grinned at her. His warm brown eyes were focused onto her blue eyes, sending a thrill through the young Empress of Russia.
"Do you want me to escort you around the ship, Your Majesty?"
Olga spoke a cheerful yes before giggling like a schoolgirl.
"Would you like an embrace?" Pavel asked in a very soft tone.
Olga nodded her assent. In a near instant, Pavel gave her a brief embrace in his strong arms. A thrilling warmth filled the heart of the Empress of Russia. This was love, and it was a glorious sensation. She sighed in affection as Pavel chuckled. For the moment, she felt as if she were in a second home.
"My wise princess," Pavel whispered.
"You meant Empress, I presume?" Olga replied in a quiet tone.
"You will always be a princess to me… in all of her wisdom."
"Oh, Pasha, if only you would speak your heart…" Olga thought when Pavel released her.
The other officer cleared his throat before speaking, "Sorry to interrupt, but I would like to introduce myself."
Olga turned to him. "You are welcome to do so, I know that you are the replacement for the previous bunkmate of Mister Voronov here, and I would like to become familiar with you."
"You may call me Mister Nagorny, Your Majesty," the officer said, giving a weak smile.
Olga noticed that the officer had his hands in his pockets and shifted his feet with unease. Perhaps the officer was nervous around her, she thought. Alternatively, he must have been quite eager to be on the Standart. No officer should fear her, but instead they should feel at ease around her.
"Be at ease, Mister Nagorny. I trust that you will display proper behavior and discipline as a part of the crew."
The officer relaxed his posture, loosening the tensed muscles in his shoulders. "May I also escort you as well?"
"Yes, you may. I shall speak with Rear-Admiral Lomen to see what role you will take… There is a chance that you may watch over one of my sisters later in your duties."
"Thank you, Your Majesty, Olga the First."
Olga chuckled. "No need to be overly formal, but I admire your enthusiasm. Now, I must see Lomen."
She made her way above deck with the company of Pavel and Nagorny. She soon arrived at the bridge, which was painted a maroon red. The three of them climbed the flights of stairs to the highest level of the bridge where the Read Admiral stood. Upon sight of the Empress, the Rear Admiral saluted her. Entering the cabin beside her escorts, she kept silent for a moment.
"Would you like a brief overview of activities on this ship, Your Majesty?" the Rear Admiral said.
"Yes, and after the report, we can decide the role that Officer Nagorny will have," Olga replied.
Lomen told the Empress that the crew was well-behaved, and that none of them slacked in their duties. The news pleased her. Pavel and Nagorny felt relieved, as the Rear-Admiral was in a good mood. If not, he was a force to be feared thanks to his rough attitudes and disposition.
"That is good to hear. I would like Nagorny to be a diadka for Maria once he has shown good behavior and performance in his duties for some time."
The Rear-Admiral stroked the stubble on his chin as he thought of his decision. Nagorny placed his hands in his pockets and wiggled his toes in his boots. He hoped that he would be allowed the honor of supervising one of the younger grand duchesses.
"I think he may, after he proves his discipline on this ship for two years," he said, looking at the new officer.
"Officer Nagorny, I have already assigned Officer Voronov as your superior. He is a very keen and helpful one, and he will show you the patrol movements around the ship later today. Any further questions?" Lomen added.
"None, sir!" Nagorny said.
"You may leave, Officer Voronov, Nagorny. I will see you, Your Majesty, during dinner."
Olga and her two escorting officers left the bridge. They looked from the high vantage point of the outer bridge floors, seeing the Little Pair roller skating on the sides of the Standart. Not far behind, Maria Pavlovna and Dmitri Pavlovich skated behind them. Officers and sailors were careful to avoid the four royals while they completed their tasks.
Olga made her way down the stairs, and she spotted Tatiana resting her arms on the starboard guardrails. The gray-blue eyes of the Grand Duchess held a pensive look into the distance.
"Is your sister alright? She seems preoccupied with something," Pavel asked as quiet as he could.
"I do not know, but I will check on Tatya. She must have been alone for quite some time," Olga replied.
"Do you require us to accompany you both?"
"Not at this moment. Stay here, Mister Voronov."
Olga went to a spot beside her sister, who acknowledged her presence with a raised eyebrow. She then remembered the words of her younger sister. She knew that she had to tell her beloved office that she could not be with him. Somehow, she could not find the courage to do so.
"You were with Mister Voronov… have you had the chance to tell him?" Tatiana asked in a low whisper.
"You ask the improbable, Tatya. I… I… have strong feelings for him, even if I cannot be with him." Olga said, shaking her head.
"The marriage to Cousin Mitya will happen. When it does, Mister Voronov will be crushed even if you do not tell him. I believe it is best to prepare him for that."
Olga glanced back as Pavel, who was chatting with Nagorny, pointing at a passing Russian destroyer ship. She returned her gaze at her sister, whose gray-blue eyes seemed to be pleading.
"I-"
"Please… you must. At least do not give the poor officer the wrong impression. Speak with sincerity and respect."
"Not at this moment. Yet, I have not decided when. Whether I do so, or do not, it still brings me agony."
"It is not my intent to cause you such agony… I only want to help."
"You do not need to remind me again," Olga said, the bitterness seeping from her tone.
Tatiana, who was about to reply, closed her mouth. She sighed. Motivating her sister to confess the news would be difficult.
"May I at least accompany you?"
"Da, Tatya."
Olga and Tatiana went to the two officers, who escorted them around the ship. They played board games together in the quarters, and spent much time becoming familiar with each other. A few hours later, dinnertime had arrived. By then, the Standart had left the English Channel and reached the Atlantic Ocean.
(Line Break)
The moon rose in the darkening evening sky, but the commotion on the Standart did not dwindle. Olga, her sisters, and her present relatives entered the yacht saloon before seven o'clock. Her grandmother, Maria Feodorovna, had arrived there long before. The aging former Tsarina of Russia gave a warm smile to her granddaughter, the current Empress of Russia. Her light blue Danish eyes seemed alight with happiness. Olga motioned for her escorts to take their seats, and they did so.
"My granddaughter, my little joy," she said, opening her arms toward the young Russian Empress.
"Grandmama," Olga said, stepping to her grandmother to hug her.
"Are you enjoying the company of your prince, dear?"
"Well… I suppose I do, but I do not yet love him."
Pavel opened his mouth in surprise, gaining the attention of his fellow new bunkmate. Realizing his mistake, Pavel shut his mouth and kept a stoic face. He could only watch his favorite former Grand Duchess, now Empress, speak with her grandmother about her prince. For the past few years, he had hardly seen his beloved Olga, and she had been courting the infamous playboy Grand Duke rather than a proper gentleman. A feeling rose up within him, and it was not acceptance. It was an ugly thing rising like yeast in flour within his heart. Still, he could not let his true feelings be known. As a nobleman of Voronov, he would act like one.
"... he is quite playful and humorous. He brings a smile to my face much of the time… unless one of his pranks goes too far. I am still uncertain of this whole dynastic marriage affair," the Empress said, glancing at Dmitri Pavlovich, who rolled his eyes.
"Do not worry about your upcoming match with little Mitya-"
"Hey, I am not little!"
"You are decades younger than I, so hush," the Dowager Empress chided.
Once Dmitri Pavlovich went silent, Maria Feodorovna continued to whisper to her granddaughter. "Nevertheless, I first did not love my husband, your grandfather Alexander. But over time, my respect for him became fondness… and then love. I must tell you that not all loves are at first sight like that of your late father and mother…"
Pavel looked up, feeling surprised. His envy and feeling of betrayal dissipated, making way for hope. Was it possible for his feelings for her to be returned? He watched the rest of the officers and crew members enter the dining area. Not long afterward, they blessed the food. At once, the sounds of pleasant chatter filled the room, and Pavel could not help but look at Olga. She smiled at him, making his heart beat a bit faster. He could only wink at her in response, being careful not to be conspicuous.
Tatiana, who sat next to Olga, noticed the silent exchange between her sister and her dashing officer. She sighed and shook her head.
"Do not worry about much, dear. Let us enjoy our time together as a family," the Dowager Empress said to Tatiana.
Dmitri Ivanov, who sat on a table separate from the Romanovs, glanced at Anastasia, who was talking with her sister Maria. Upon making eye contact with Anastasia, Dmitri could feel his body tingle with excitement. Anastasia giggled with her sister.
"You like her very much," Anna Demidova said to the kitchen servant.
"I do, but only as a friend..." Dmitri said with a wavering tone.
"I wish that your friendship will remain strong for the years to come, Mister Ivanov."
"Spasibo, Nyuta. Her Imperial Highness means very much to me."
Dinner passed by quickly. After everyone had finished, they celebrated a toast.
"To the glory and longevity of Holy Rus," Olga said.
"Aye! Aye!"
Olga clinked her glass with that of her grandmother, then her sisters. Anastasia and Maria would taste wine for the first time. Anastasia made a funny face upon a few sips of wine, but Maria nodded in approval.
"Tastes like cough syrup," the youngest Grand Duchess muttered.
"It is part alcohol, Nastya," Maria said before sipping again.
Olga looked at her fiance, Dmitri Pavlovich, who began to slur his words while speaking to Maria Pavlovna. The Empress felt embarrassed. A Romanov, drunk!
"Yeah… your s-sister's riiight..." the Grand Duke slurred, pounding his glass on the table.
Tatiana took the glass away from the now intoxicated Grand Duke, who voiced his dissent. She cleared her throat.
"Coome oon, miss... give me baack my glaass."
"Excuse my rudeness, but please shut up. You are making a fool of yourself," Tatiana said.
Olga excused herself from the table, and Tatiana got up as well. Both of them could not tolerate the antics of their Cousin Mitya any longer.
"Officer Voronov, Officer Nagorny, please escort us to our quarters."
"As you wish, Your Majesty," both officers said.
Both of the officers escorted the Grand Duchess and Empress of Russia under the moonlight. Once they had reached the stairs to the sections below deck, Olga stopped walking.
"Nagorny, watch over my sister. I must speak to Officer Voronov."
Nagorny nodded. Tatiana nodded at her sister, but for a different reason. She hoped that Pasha would take the news well. Once Olga was some distance away, she began to speak.
"Pasha… I… I..."
"My sweet Romanova, say what you have to say."
"I… I do not know what to say."
"You are brave, Olga. I know about your courtship with his Imperial Highness Dmitri Pavlovich. Is it true that your grandmother plans to marry you with him?"
After a moment of agonizing silence, Olga replied. "Y- yes."
"Do you want it?"
"I do not know!"
"Why?"
"Because- Because I- I love you very much yet I know that we cannot be together-"
"I know. But at least we can enjoy our mutual company while it lasts, my wise princess. You may lose your feelings for me, but please… do not forget about me."
Olga felt a tear roll down her cheek.
"Pasha… my sunshine…"
"Yes, I will do anything... anything you ask."
Pasha kept silent, looking with his saddened brown eyes. He knew what would happen in a few years, but there was no need to say it again.
"As the very first one who took my heart, will you take the honor of my first kiss? No one is watching us…" Olga whispered.
"Are you certain?" Pavel said, his brown eyes glistening in the moonlight.
The officer looked back, and Tatiana and Nagorny were walking back to the yacht saloon. Olga nodded, and she lifted her face up to stare into those hazel brown eyes once more. Even the hardened and well-disciplined officer could not keep his composure, as his eyebrows were scrunched together in an effort not to cry. The Empress of Russia parted her lips ever so slightly, closing her eyes.
Pavel gave a chaste peck on the pink lips of the young, vulnerable lady in front of him. A warm feeling filled their bodies. It sent sparks of passion through them, and they kissed again for a moment. So this was love… but one that was never meant to be. Both of them knew it, even as every fiber of their bodies screamed for more contact. With great effort, they pulled away from each other. Olga could no longer hold back. She burst out a sob, falling into the embrace of her dashing officer for what seemed like the last time…
"I am so sorry… so sorry…" Olga whispered.
"It is alright. At least you will find happiness once again with your husband-to-be. We will find a way to go on," Pavel said.
A.N: As much as I wanted to get Olga and Pavel into a full blown affair, I knew that they were too far apart in station. I am so sorry. Anyways, I hope that you enjoyed the cameo of Maria Feodorovna and the extended royal family.
Reply to Gabros: Thank you for the review, having the extended family opens up many possibilities that I could not resist!
Reply to Megan Lyle: I sincerely apologize, but I reassure you that Olga and Pavel will have their happy endings later.
Reply to Firemangan: Yes, having the Romanovs in America will be very fun to write! Perhaps the progressive nature of America will provide Olga with some inspiration for her reign.