Ram and Strider slowly moved into rougher terrain. The slight slopes were turning into hills and mountains. The sun was shining down upon them, but the air was cold and Ram knew for sure it would freeze that night.
They kept hidden, knowing the best route to take not to be noticed. Ram would scan their surroundings, listening in, and looking for any kind of danger. But she also kept her eyes on the ranger in front of her. She was worried. His slouched shoulders, the tiny stops when he would lean against a tree. Pretending to scout his surroundings. But Ram knew he was wearing out. He still had not taken the painkillers and his arm must hurt. He was starting to sway a little and as he stopped at a large pine tree, he leaned against it with one shoulder.
Ram softly cursed to herself, as she walked to him. His face was as pale as a sheet.
"Sit." She ordered. She placed her heavy pack down on the forest floor. She flinched in pain as the pack touched her bruise on its way down. At least she was turned away from Strider.
He sat down against the tree without arguing. He looked pale and she could see from his face he was in pain. Ram took out their last piece of bread and a leaf from the painkillers.
He has to take them. We are running out of options. She thought. She had to convince him somehow. When she turned back he had his eyes closed. Ram quickly looked if the splint was still in its place. It was looking good, and it felt normal to the touch. She silently thanked the gods for that. At least he was healing properly. His sling had gotten loose, so she leaned closer to readjusted it.
Pipeweed and trees.
She was so close to him, she could feel his warm breath on her face. But she was afraid to look into his eyes. Afraid she would see his pain, his plea for help. She did not want to fail him. Like she had done in the first place.
This is my fault. If I moved sooner, it would have been my arm that was broken, not his. I would not mind though. Better me than him. I just want to help him. but he needs to take the herbs. That stubborn ranger.
Her mind was running, as guilt crept closer to her heart. Ram handed him the bread she got, as well as the herbs.
"Eat them, Strider. We need to keep going." She spoke strictly. It came out harsher than she intended. But she did not know how to get him to move.
She turned around to her bag to put away his healing kit. Winching in pain once more as her side started to pulse with pain. She was trying to calm herself with the familiar actions of tucking her belongings in her pack. When she put everything in its place, she turned back. Strider was still looking at the leaf.
"Strider, What is wrong?" She asked frustrated. He moved the leaf up to his lips, but then his hand lowered again.
"Last time I took these….." He did not finish his sentence, but the look in his eyes was one of utter despair.
There was something wrong. How did she not see it before? He was not refusing her help. There was something else going on here.
Ready to solve the problem differently, Ram let go of her frustration and sat down next to him.
"Strider." She spoke softly as she placed her hand on his good arm. He looked up at her. Their eyes met finally. She could see his pain all over his face, and the despair in his eyes. Ram was overwhelmed with the feeling of wanting to take him in her arms and take his pain away.
"Please. I beg you, my friend." She whispered. "I can see you are in much pain. We need to get you to a proper healer. Winter is settling in and there is no alternative painkiller. You can not go on like this. I can't help you and I won't leave you behind. Please."
She sighed and looked into his stormy grey eyes. "I don't know what you are afraid of or what you think will happen, but I will take care of you and keep you safe. Trust me, my friend. As I trust you."
The injured ranger looked away from her. "I… Last time… I hurt someone. Someone dear to me. I don't want to hurt you, Ram." He spoke. Strider looked up at her. She could see he was on the edge of breaking.
Ram softly placed her hand on his cheek. "Then listen to me. If you worry you will attack me, I can kick your ass in hand to hand combat if I try hard enough. And you are injured, so I am sure I can best you."
He looked away.
So he wasn't afraid of hurting her physically. She thought.
"And I will not believe anything you tell me. In fact, I won't even listen to you when you talk nonsense like I usually do. How about that?" She winked at him. She could see he relaxed a bit and he leaned into her touch.
He closed his eyes and when he finally sighed, he was no longer looking at her. "Very well." He said softly.
Ram let go of him as he sighed and put the leaf into his mouth.
He gave the rest back to her. She nodded quietly and pulled him up. She could see the relief on his face as his pain lessened.
Thank the gods. She thought as she grabbed his good hand and took off again, noticing a slight sway in his step.
His hand was warm, and Ram hoped he was not getting a fever. She could feel his ring between her fingers, a bit hidden by his fingerless glove. Both of their hands were rough, used for working and fighting. She had taken it in instinct, making her connection to his closer, so she could keep an eye on him. The connection between them calmed her down, but it also sped up her heartbeat. But the strong ranger pushed down those feelings for now, as they continued their way to the ranger outpost.
Slowly the two found their pace again. Strider would take the painkillers and Ram would take his hand. They had gotten to a forest with thick fir trees. The nights had been cold and the days were sunny. But the warmth did not always reach them. Ram was worried about their road, she feared winter would come soon. Her bruised side was slowly turning into various shades of blue and purple and if it was not for the salve Lord Elrond had given them, she was sure she would have a lot more trouble to move and carry their heaviest pack. She hid her injury from Strider, knowing it was stupid. But she was worried about him. And if he suspected she was injured, he would stop taking his painkillers once more.
She had seen tracks on their road. They were old, but they had to be careful. Strider was in no way to fight. He had not tried to hurt her or even said something strange, but as the days passed, the wild lettuce dried, increasing its effect.
Ram had understood the last few days why he did not like to take it. He tried to aid her and take in his surroundings, looking around for danger. But once the painkiller had kicked in, he was unable to. He had not even spotted the tracks, and Ram knew he was not himself.
She stopped walking, looking around. That tracks on the grounds were fresher, letting her know they were getting closer to the ones that were making them. But it did not add up. They were moving at a slow pace. How were the travelers in front of her even slower? She was a good tracker and when she traveled this slow, the tracks she followed were supposed to grow older as the makers of the tracks would travel faster.
It was clear to her they were moving in the same direction as them, but it wasn't that strange, since the trail they were following was used sometimes by traders and rangers alike. She hoped it was the latter. They would be killed if they had to fight.
She looked up at Strider who was drinking something from his water bag. Her eyes lingered on his arm securely tucked in its splint. She stood up, ready to get going again.
But then Strider pulled her arm. As he caught her by surprise, she slammed into the tree with her back. A slight oomph escaped her lips, but before she could move, Strider had pinned her against the tree. He was only inches away from her. His pupils were dilated, almost as large as his irises. He had just taken another leaf on their last stop.
Oh crap, he is going to kill me.
The thought split through her head when she already noticed he was not going to kill her.
Strider moved even closer and put his nose in her hair. She could feel his strong body push her against the rough tree. "You smell so good." He spoke low, his cheek against her ear, and his lips close to her neck. Her heart skipped a beat and Ram had to fight her body to react to him in the same way. But she knew she could not. She did not want it. Not now he was intoxicated.
So instead, she softly grabbed hold of him, pulling him into her embrace. He wanted to move his head, but Ram held on tight, locking his head against her cheek as she held him with her free hand. He wrapped his arms around her. Both of them stayed in that embrace for a while. After a while, she could feel his body go rigid. She loosened up her grip on him when he whispered. "I am sorry Ram." He wanted to move away from her, but she kept him there. After a moment he relaxed, letting her hold him.
"No need, my friend. There is no harm done. Come on." She slowly let him go, smiling at him. She could feel her heart race, but not by fear. This was the closest they had ever been to each other without fighting or needing to heal the other.
"You are too good for me," Strider said as he wanted to move away from her.
Trying to lighten the mood, she snickered. "Yes, I am. But as a ranger, I need to lower my standards." She tapped his cheek softly, wanting him to snap out of this strange mood.
But her statement did not have the desired reaction. Strider's face fell, and she could see the hurt on his face clearly. He was hurt by her words. Ram quickly grabbed his arm, and turned their places, pinning him against the tree.
She looked into his stoned eyes, seeing the effect of the herbs take away a bit of the large wall he built around him. "My dearest friend. I hold you in the highest regard, do not ever doubt my love for you." She moved and kissed him on his brow. For a moment, they stood there, her lips on his dirty face. when she lifted her lips softly, he had trouble focusing on her, letting Ram know he was getting worse. "Come, Strider, you need more help than I can give you. Let's keep going."
He nodded and together they walked on, towards their home.
It got colder the next couple of days and to Ram's fear, even the wild lettuce was running out. There were also many fresh tracks around them. Sometimes they could see another fire in the distance when the sun was setting. They were moving in the same direction, but they were slower than them and at one moment they would run into them. Ram had not told Strider about it yet, afraid he would stop taking the painkillers. But as the days moved on, the fires got closer and the chances of them running into the other party were getting bigger.
It was at the end of the day when Ram ran into tracks that were too fresh for comfort. They were human tracks, and there were not many. But it still could mean danger. She pulled Strider closer. She was holding his hand because he had taken a leaf not too long ago. She signaled him to be quiet, and he moved closer to her. "Others." She whispered, pointing ahead of the way they were going. Strider straightened his back, looking ahead. They could see the glow of their fire in the distance.
Ram started to move to get the pack off her back and get their weapons out. She turned back to Strider and noticed the man was not there. She cursed as she saw him closer to the light. She ran after him, as quiet as possible. Her hand moving towards her shield. She cursed again in her mind as she realized she no longer held it and her hand moved towards the large sword on her belt.
Not eager to pull it, she left it in its scabbard for now. She cursed out loud when she saw Strider walk into the circle of fire.
What is it with him and walking into camps? She wondered.
But before she could run after him, someone blocked her path. A man stood beside her, moving quickly. Ram reacted in instinct, blocking his blows and quickly turning away from him. She wanted to get to Strider, but this man and his knife were in her way.
They moved quickly and though Ram was at a disadvantage since the large sword was still on her belt. She moved to disarm him. But he moved as well and the two burst into a fight once more. For a moment, Ram had the upper hand.
But then she noticed Strider, leaning on another man. She moved just too late and her attacker grabbed her and pulled her in a neck-lock. Her breath was caught off. She tried to get a grip on his arm, but she clawed at it in vain. Slowly she started to panic as her air was cut-off. Her eyes met Strider who was already running to her, hitting him in his face with his good hand.
The older man moved with Strider. "KALLEN!" The man snapped. "Let her go." Her attacker let her go, dropping her to her knees as she tried to get air into her lungs. But Strider had not stopped and pushed the man away from her. "Strider, stop." Her raspy voice was loud enough for him to hear and she caught after to clear her could hear Strider saying something to her attacker, but she was too busy trying to breathe to hear what he said. She felt a gentle hand on her back.
The older man stuck out his hand and helped her up. "There, no need for rangers to attack each other in the night. Come with us. The night is cold, but we have a fire."
Ram shook her head as she adjusted her glove. She looked at her attacker, seeing him looking a bit shocked at Strider. "Who are you?" Ram asked, looking from the older man to the other.
It was Strider who answered. "This is Halbarad. He is my friend. Who that is, I don't know." He pointed at the young man with a disgusted look on his face.
He turned to Halbarad before he stuck out his hand to the female ranger to pull her up. "This is Ram."
Halbarad took her in. She knew what he was looking at. She was dirty, with dark circles underneath her eyes.
"You are Mace's cousin." He stated after a moment. Ram nodded. With that, the other ranger looked back at Strider. "This is Kallen," Halbarad said.
Strider looked at the man, his pupils large, but the contempt was all over his face.
"One of the recruits," Strider said, as he placed his hand on Halbarads shoulder for support.
Kallen looked back at Strider. "Who is this stoner?" He asked.
He did not just say that. Ram clenched her fists as it felt as if steam came from her ears. She glared at the younger ranger, ready to hurt him.
But Halbarad moved and slapped Kallen on the back of his head. "This is your chief. And if you had put anything you learned to use, you would have seen he is injured and probably on painkillers." Halbarad looked back at Ram. "Wild lettuce if I am correct."
Ram nodded. "We will talk around the fire. But first I need to get our packs."
"Kallen, help her," Halbarad ordered, as he looked at Strider. His head tilted slightly and his eyebrows knit together. He looked worried.
The young ranger opened his mouth to protest.
"It is the least you can do for attacking another ranger out of nowhere." Halbarad snapped before he could say something.
Ram was not going to wait on the younger man and turned to walk back to their packs.
Kallen followed quickly. "I feel I need to apologize. I am sorry for attacking you, my lady."
"I ain't a lady." Ram snapped back. "You could have killed me! Why did you attack me anyway? I am sure you had the same training as me. Talk first with people." She moved her hand towards her side. The small struggle with the other ranger had aggravated her injuries and she bent from left to right to release the tension on her muscles.
Kallen took a sprint until he was next to her. "To be honest, I was shocked, seeing a strange man walk into our camp, followed by someone. I.. I have only been in fights, so I reacted."
Ram nodded, She had been in his position before. "You were lucky. If Strider had not shown up I would have thrown you against a tree." Kallen laughed. "You wish. I had you." She looked at him with a raised eyebrow and the joy quickly left the young man as soon as it had arrived. He looked at her with puppy dog eyes. He looked kind of cute like that and Ram found herself snickering at his look. She knew when she was bested.
They arrived at the packs and Ram took a moment to catch her breath. "Next time you won't be so lucky." She snickered as she handed Kallen Strider's pack.
He grabbed it and put it on his back adjusting it a bit. "Strider must have been beaten up badly if his pack is so light."
Ram nodded. "He is, the lack of anything better than wild lettuce was another thing. But it was one mean troll. We had trouble fighting it off"
Kallen stopped for a moment. "You fought a troll? But you are a woman!"
Ram glared over her shoulder to the younger ranger. "I am a ranger. I can fight like everyone."
Kallen had raised his hands in defense. "I apologize, This is all new to me."
Ram pulled her pack on her shoulder and winced as her side flared up in pain.
"You are hurt too." He stated. Ram could not muster the fight to disagree with him. Kallen looked at her and held out his hand. "Give me your pack." He stated. Ram sighed and handed him her pack as he gave Strider's pack to her. He looked at her, a bit surprised, as he felt how heavy her pack was.
"I hate to say it, but you two are lucky you ran into us." Kallen motioned her to walk ahead of him.
So he knows about that agreement. Ram noted as she walked towards the camp. He was right. "Come on. I am tired and it will be nice to have a full night sleep." Ram said as the two rangers walked back.
They reached the small camp quickly. There was a small tent put up and there was food in a pot over the fire. Strider and Halbarad were talking. By the smell of it, Halbarad was boiling some herbs to serve as a painkiller. Strider looked pale, but she could see the wild lettuce was slowly losing its grip on him. She placed her pack on the ground, but could not help to inhale sharply. Her side was protesting heavily to all the movement she had done. She sat down slowly, trying not to aggravate it further. Halbarad raised his eyebrow at her actions. "You are hurt." It wasn't a question. Strider's head snapped towards her. Ram shrugged her shoulders. There was no fooling Halbarad. He was an experienced healer, and she was too tired to hide her injury. "Just a nasty bruise. I am on the meant, but the salve I have been using has stopped working." She explained, trying to tone it down as she saw Strider's worried face.
Strider wanted to move towards her, but Halbarad softly placed a hand on his friend's arm.
"You should have told me," Strider said, looking worried at her.
Ram shook her head. "And make you worry even more? You have your own pain to look after Strider. I am fine."
But the other ranger shook his head. "No, let me have a look."
Ram crossed her arms and looked at the ranger. She was not going to lose with this one. And it took all of her willpower not to look away and blush.
"How about I will take a look at it." Halbarad mentioned softly, looking from one to the other. "This way it gets checked and Strider will not have to strain himself."
Ram sighed. "Fine." She snapped. I am not the one he should be worried about. I will be fine. She thought to herself. But she had no choice now.
She moved towards the fire, so Halbarad would have enough light and she would not cool down too much. But as she looked up she saw yet another pair of eyes look at her. Kallen had sat himself down at an angle he would have a clear vision of her body. He was looking like a wolf who had just spotted his prey. There was a slight smile on his face and it gave Ram the shivers. She had seen it before and it was usually taken care of by the other rangers. As it was this time. "Kallen…." Halbarad spoke coldly. "Do I need to remind you, you are on watch." Halbarad had not even looked at the young man.
"But Halbarad…" Kallen started.
Halbarad turned his head. "I also do not need to remind you we have two fellow rangers injured and I am busy with the healing. Now go."
Kallen muttered something to himself, but got up and grabbed his weapons before leaving the light of the fire.
"I apologize for my companion. He is still young. It is his first time with us in the wild. But he will get there." Halbarad said as he grabbed their medical pack.
"He is a good fighter. He will learn." Ram replied as she removed her cloak and lifted her shirt.
Halbarad looked a bit shocked. "That is some bruise you got there, lass."
Ram snorted. "We were lucky it was a small troll, or we would have been off far worse."
Halbarad nodded. "Strider told me you killed it."
Ram looked into the fire. "I did... I just wish I did it sooner." She winced as Halbarad pressed on her bruise.
"Were you able to?" He asked kindly.
Ram shook her head. "No, I just wish I did. Then Strider would not have been wounded."
Halbarads fingers moved over the bruise. "No, he could be dead. No one knows what would have happened. Don't beat yourself up about it. You both live. Be thankful for that." He gently put the salve on her bruised skin.
He is right. Strider is going to be fine. You killed the troll. Ram finally told herself. She let go of her breath, She only blamed herself, nobody else did. She looked back at the older man, smiling weakly at him.
"You are lucky lass. It does not seem like you have anything broken." He winked at her. Her side was starting to feel better already. After she dressed, Ram quickly put up their tent with the help of Halbarad and Strider soon got to his bedroll. Ram was quick to follow.
The next morning came with a cold, thin layer of snow. It quickly melted as soon as the sun rose, but it was a clear sign to the rangers that winter was upon them. Though there were still plenty of resources in the wild and the temperatures were not too low, they all felt a feeling of haste.
When Ram got out of the tent she had already grabbed her and Strider's bedroll and she quickly moved to break up the tent before she had breakfast.
Strider was sitting near the fire looking a lot better. The change of painkillers did him good. He handed Ram a bowl of porridge. "morning." He said quietly. Ram gave him a slight nod and sat down carefully. The cold was working against her injury, making her a bit stiff and sore. She could see the look in Strider's eyes. He was worried about her.
"Don't, I'm fine." She stated as she moved her body to get her muscles warm again. Strider did not reply, but his eyes were on her. Ram ate her breakfast in silence.
Ram walked over to her pack to get the salve for her bruise.
Strider was next to her within moments. "Let me help you." He said softly, a pleading look in his stormy eyes. Now he knew, Ram had no reason to refuse and so she sighed and handed him the salve. She lifted her shirt, goosebumps formed on her skin as the cold air blew her naked skin. He moved quickly and his gentile hand rubbed the salve on her soar skin. Ram noticed how close the other ranger was, and how soft his touch. It was so tempting to give in and lean against his chest and be in his arms for just a moment.
But before she could think about it, Strider was done and he softly lowered her tunic. "I wished you would have told me, Ram." He said. Ram could hear the emotion in his voice.
She turned and looked him in his eyes. "Strider, you have broken your arm, you were on wild lettuce and not thinking straight. There was nothing you could have done but worry and not take your painkillers. We needed to move, I am sorry, I did not want to keep it from you. But sometimes there are things you don't share for the protection of others." She could see him think about it.
"I understand." He looked up and placed his good hand kindly on her knee. "Thank you. Perhaps one day the roles will be reversed. I ask you to think about this moment, Ram." There was a hint of sadness in his eyes when he looked at her.
Ram nodded. "I trust your judgment, Strider." For a moment Ram wondered what Strider was hiding from her.
"Are you two lovebirds ready to go?" Kallen sneered at them. He looked at them as if he smelled something foul. Strider shot to his feet, glaring at the younger ranger. He did not speak, he just glared. Ram shrunk, having been on the receiving end of that glare when she was still training. He wasn't even looking at her, but she knew what it felt like. Kallen soon gave up and looked at the ground. "It was in jest, captain. I apologize."
"Think before you say something," Strider stated calmly. Kallen nodded, but his eyes flashed to Ram, a hint of a smile around his lips.
"We are ready," Strider said as he stuck out his good hand towards Ram and pulled her up.
Strider looked around the group and opened his hand to Kallen. "Lead the way." Ram was behind him, earning a wink from the younger man as he passed her by. Strider followed her and Halbarad closed the line, keeping a close eye on Strider and Ram.