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Soliciting in a Bun Suit

The following morning, Haruhi got to work handing out fliers and filling up calendar slots outside at the school's main entrance. When I visited and stopped to talk to her, she greeted me wearing one of the craziest costumes I'd ever seen—as a hot dog bun.

I stood to the side with my arms crossed and watched the action, amazed. "What's with the crazy getup?" I asked her during a short break; her gig generated lots of attention.

"It's like this." Her face turned serious. "I bought two awesome bunny girl outfits for me and Mikuru to wear for just this type of activity, but now that she's become a jacket girl, I've got to follow suit."

"So you traded two bunny girl outfits for this?"

"From bunny to bun." She nodded. "This is half of a couple's costume. They have a bunch. Salt and pepper. Plug and receptacle. Toothpaste and toothbrush." She put out her arms. "I'm a hot dog bun in search of a wiener. What could be better?"

"Things seem to be working out for you."

"So far, they are." She shook her notebook. "I'm booked for the next two weeks plus the following Monday." She pointed to a neatly folded jacket resting against the brick wall. "That's what I'm wearing today." She shoved her hand into the bun costume's pocket and pulled out some bills. "Plus, I scored some funds for the SOS Brigade party fund."

"We're throwing a party?"

"Yep. A sausage party. In two weeks."

"Wait a minute," I said. "You're giving blowjobs in exchange for the use of a jacket, am I right?"

"You know the deal, shirt-and-tie boy." She playfully tugged my tie. "One blowjob per jacket-day. By the way, did Yuki pay her rent yet?"

"Yeah, she blew me a couple of minutes ago under the bleachers."

"That was you making all that noise?"

"How would you know?"

"I paid my jacket rent in the locker room hallway. Do you always scream like a little girl when you come?"

"Yuki did this ball massaging maneuver I wasn't expecting," I said in my defense. "How did you get that money?"

"My client offered me a two thousand Yen bonus if I stuck my finger in his ass." She wiggled her middle digit.

I pinched my nose.

"Don't worry. I washed it really well. Anyway, he gave me a great idea. Offer premium services. It's amazing how much more a guy will pay if you blow him with mints in your mouth while humming the national anthem. I may not be as well endowed as Mikuru, but I give a damn good titty fuck too."

"So does Yuki," I said. "But she never charges me extra."

"That girl is so sweet."

"If not a tad gullible."

"Yuki Nagato is the smartest person in this school, by far. It's almost like she's an alien or something. Don't underestimate that little lady. She knows what's up, and she's having just as much fun as we are, though she doesn't like to show it. Hey, I got to get back to work. I just realized I better book some alternates in case someone takes a sick day."

"Then get to work." I left her at the entrance.

###

Haruhi came to homeroom twenty minutes later dressed in nothing but a jacket, and it looked amazing on her. As was the case with Nagato, the coattails barely covered her shapely bum. Her toned, long legs looked phenomenal.

As I marveled at her beauty, a pang of anger rose in my chest from the realization that I might not get any action from this girl again, ever. I politely suppressed it.

"I see that another North High coed is coming out as well," homeroom teacher Okabe quipped after the bell rang. "When did you decide you liked wearing men's clothing, Miss Suzumiya?"

Haruhi ignored the barb and countered, "That's a sexy jacket you're wearing, Sensei." She waved her notebook. "Would you rent it to me for a day?"

Mr. Okabe's cheeks turned crimson and he cleared his throat. He didn't mention Haruhi's wardrobe preferences again.

###

Later that day, the SOS Brigade assembled in the club room. All three female members wore jackets. The males wore shirts-and-ties.

Haruhi stood at the whiteboard. "We're going to throw a Sausage Party. I've thrown several of them in the past, and they're great fun, especially if you love the feel of something warm, juicy, and cylindrical filling your mouth." She performed what had become her signature move; she licked her lips.

Succumbing to a Pavlovian response, both Koizumi and I shifted uncomfortably in our seats and crossed our legs.

"Sounds great," Koizumi said.

"Uh-huh," I added. "Sign me up."

Pleased with the fruits of her training, Haruhi smiled. "Okay, girls, please relieve the men."

ZZZZZZIP.

When I glanced over, my jacket lay folded on Yuki's seat. She'd gotten so used to performing nude services for the Computer Society, removing her jacket became her default. Mikuru removed her jacket in a far more leisurely way before kneeling at my feet.

When someone knocked on the door, we quickly shifted to stealth mode.

"Come in," Haruhi said.

Tsuruya walked through the door. "Hey, Haru." She eyed me and Koizumi seated at the table, a chessboard between us, light slurping sounds emanating from beneath. "Gentlemen."

We waved.

"Is what Mikuru is saying true? That the SOS is in the SOS Brigade stands for Sensational Oral Sex and that you've formed a fellatio club?"

"She's wrong," Haruhi said.

"What's that noise?" Tsuruya tuned her ear to the slurping sounds. She knelt down and looked under the table. Then she got up and glared at Haruhi.

"SOS stands for Spectacular Oral Sex," our leader replied, "not Sensational. Lots of people screw that up and I want it to be clear."

"I want to join."

"My brigade currently has five members. Aside from me, there are two boys and two girls, and I don't really want to make it much bigger than that. It's already a lot to manage."

Tsuruya frowned. "Hmmm."

Koizumi scrunched his eyes shut. "Aaaaargh."

I clenched my fists, pounded the table, and groaned. "Oh, boy."

Moments later, a jacketed, bespectacled beauty once again filled Yuki's chair by the window.

Sporting a full mouth, Mikuru rose from the table near my seat and meekly waved at Tsuruya. As she swallowed down my load, savoring every drop, she wiped her breasts with a wet cloth before pulling Koizumi's jacket over her spectacular nudity.

"I may not be able to take on official members at this time," Haruhi said, "but I'm open to having booster members. It's a concept I've been mulling around."

"What are booster members?" Tsuruya asked.

"Quasi-members who help out at events, support the SOS charter, and agree to wear the official SOS uniform acquired in the accepted way."

"Acquired in the accepted way, huh? So I'd have to rent some guy's jacket instead of buying my own. Mikuru told me rentals are going for one blowjob per day."

"That is correct" Haruhi placed her hands on her hips. "And all the jackets in this room are spoken for."

I raised my hand. "I've got a friend who'd be dying to rent you his jacket." The image of Taniguchi smiling came to mind. Maybe drooling would be more accurate.

Haruhi flipped through her notebook. "If Kyon is suggesting who I think he's suggesting, the guy actually has a fairly nice dick. Good shape. Excellent hardness. Semen tastes so-so. I gave it a seven."

Tsuruya patted my shoulder. "What's your friend's number?"

And thus, the SOS Booster program was born.