Victor hiccups as he clutches his heart, shoulders shaking violently from the force of his crying. His tears flowing freely from his eyes, falling to the concrete below him. He's thankful for Phichit's magical veil that hides them from the eyes of the humans, thus enabling him to mourn for Yuuri in front of the people he knows. He brings his fingers to his lips, savoring the phantom feeling of Yuuri's lips against his. He sobs as he remembers the last moment of Katsuki Yuuri.
His eyes, widened slightly as Victor kissed him, and Victor saw it.
The sparks.
The very thing that starts everything, and also the one that ends everything. They are burned at the back of his eyelids, a cruel reminder of how his selfishness has cost him his love and life.
He brings himself up from his stupor and walks to his companions. Yuri is averting his gaze from him, one hand rubbing his eyes, but even from his place Victor can see a bit of moisture in his eyes. Phichit is standing in his spot, smiling happily as always. Victor has a sudden urge to wipe that smile from his face, but it is soon squashed down with the realization that it won't change anything.
Seung-gil, though, is looking at Victor with a rare smirk gracing his usually poker face. Victor raises one of his eyebrows at this, and he can feel dread creeping up from his toes.
He clears his throat, and approaches Phichit.
"So, what now?" he asks, voice hoarse from crying. Phichit opens his mouth to answer, but Seung-gil beats him to it.
"Now, you are stripped from your status as a Death God." He says triumphantly.
He can hear Yuri gasps from his place. He closes his eyes, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose, head nodding in understanding.
"Okay." He answers as he sighs in defeat.
"Oi, Boss, can't you do something?!" he sees Yuri shouts to Phichit, who, strangely, only smiles as the young Death God marching angrily at him.
Yuri grips the collar of Phichit's shirt, shaking him from side to side. "You are a God, right? Do something! Anything!" he shouts almost desperately, which Phichit replies with laughter.
"And YOU!" Yuri turns to walk to Victor. "How come you just accept it like that? Have you no pride as a Death God?! How come a mere human turn you like this?!" his cousin shouts to his face.
Victor keeps mum against the onslaught of Yuri's anger. He can see Seung-gil approaching from the corner of his eyes.
"I'm so sorry to interrupt, Yuri. But Victor here already broke the rule of not falling in love with a human, and I'm sure he understands the consequences of that action." Seung-gil explains, prying Yuri's hands from Phichit. He then turns to Victor. "You do know the consequences, right, Victor?" he asks menacingly.
Victor only nods as a reply. Yuri gapes at him, face in disbelief of what he just saw happening before him.
"Wow, Victor. Really?" he asks. "The Victor I know will never abide by the rules." He says, deflated. Victor can see disappointment in his eyes, and he averts his gaze in embarrassment. Yuri may never say it out loud, but everyone around him knows that he respects, if not idolizes, Victor. And to see those eyes that previously always look up to him in wonder and admiration change into a look of dejection, Victor doesn't think he can bear it.
"Yeah, the Victor I know will never follow the rules." Victor hears Phichit quips. "The Victor I know always finds some holes in the rules." He continues as he approaches Yuri and puts his arm on the blonde's shoulder. "After all, his motto is 'Rules are made to be broken', right, Victor?" he taunts from his place beside Yuri.
Victor mulls over his words for a few moments, and then a realization hits him.
Oh.
"The rule states that a Death God can't fall in love with a human." He mumbles as he turns towards Seung-gil. He can see Phichit grinning at him, coaxing him to continue. Yuri stares at him in rapt attention, waiting for what Victor is going to say.
"I confessed my feeling to Yuuri after his death." He says to Seung-gil. He can see his smirk slipping off from his stoic face.
"So, yeah, technically Victor here didn't fall in love with a human, because Yuuri is no longer human when he realized his feeling." Phichit supplies, the shit-eating grin on his face directed at his fuming assistant. "Sorry to burst your bubble, Seung-gil, but Victor here will remain as a Death God." He turns to Victor, nods approvingly and gives him a thumbs-up, and Yuri, whose face akin to an expression of relief, exhales a breath. Victor smiles at the two of them, but a nagging feeling is still present at the back of his head.
So yeah, he's still a Death God, and then?
Besides, what good can come from me being a Death God? What's the use of being an immortal if there's no Yuuri beside him?
He can now understand why Georgi, and all of the previous Death Gods who fell in love with humans, chose to throw their status willingly. For there's no life without love, he thinks bitterly.
He can hear someone laughing, cutting his thoughts. Phichit is ruffling Seung-gil's hair while consoling the fuming Death God, giggling every now and then.
"Okay, now that everything's been settled, let's go home, shall we?" he asks cheerily. He then turns to Yuri. "Yuri, thank you for your hard work. I know it's been a rough day for you, especially for your first day of work. So, as a reward, you don't need to submit the soul to the Collection Department, and you're freed from your obligation of making a report for the Record Department for your duty today." Phichit explains. Yuri only nods at the offer, and after giving the pocket of souls to Phichit, he disappears quickly (not before throwing a worried glance to Victor and Victor swears he canhear a low murmur of 'Come back home soon, old man' from the brat).
Phichit holds the pocket in his hand, looking at it almost fondly, and Victor tears his gaze away from the pocket, focusing on observing his shoes instead.
"Well, Seung-gil, just like you said before, I have a lot of work to be done. So, what do I need to do now?" he asks his assistant who's still trying to compose himself from his anger.
Seung-gil takes a deep breath and replies, "You still need to approve some reports from Yakov. Not to mention the list of blessings from the Angels, meeting with The Council, reading through some proposals from The Academy, and then reviewing the souls submitted today…" He then pauses, then a look of realization flits across his face. It happens so quickly had Victor not been paying attention, he would miss it. Victor then sees the man's face turn into a scowl.
"Don't you dare..." Seung-gilsays through gritted teeth, eyes narrowing to the God beside him who's busy playing with the string of the pocket in his hand.
Phichit hums. "Oh, yeah, I dare to do that, Seung-gil." He says while nodding his head.
Victor stares at the two of them in confusion, and is going to voice out his question when he sees Phichit smiling deviously at him.
"Say, Victor, what do you know about Reincarnation?"
"So, after you submit the souls to the Collection Department, they will sort all the souls into their respective categories. Does anyone know how many categories are available for the souls?"
Victor looks up from his doodles of poodles and looks around his class. He can see Mila and one of her friends whispering to each other, occasional giggles can be heard from the two of them. Georgi is busy touching up his new hairstyle, a reflection of light from the small mirror hidden by his textbooks hits one side of his face. Chris is not so subtly dozing off next to him, probably because he's staying up late the night before. He finds that almost everyone in the room, except for the professor and some diligent students, are busy with their own activity and paying no attention to the lecture.
Victor sighs and flips the pages of his textbook lazily. They are now in a mandatory class for all aspiring Death Gods, learning about the fundamentals of soul reaping. Regardless of their grades, all students must take this course at the beginning of every new academic year. The reason is simple; so that they will never forget every little thing related to their job. It's a good class for the first years, but after hearing the same lecture over and over again, Victor can safely say that he knows the rules like the back of his hand.
Victor personally never likes rote learning like this. He prefers hands-on practice; too bad The Academy is not a fan of practical learning in soul-reaping. So now the only thing he can do is sitting at the back of the study hall with his friends, and fills up pages of his notebook with doodles of his dog Makkachin.
So concentrated he is in his work he doesn't realize the lecturer is calling his name until Georgi nudges him. He looks up and sees that the lecturer is staring at him with narrowed eyes, mouth turned into a scowl.
"Now, what's the answer, Victor?" the lecturer asks him. Victor clears his throat, red paints his cheeks for being caught not paying attention to the lesson by his teacher. He glances to Chris and Georgi on either sides of him, eyes desperately searching for help, and Georgi slides his notebook closer to Victor, the question from the lecturer written haphazardly in the corner of its page. Victor cheers internally and makes a promise to himself to buy him a hearty portion of meal after school.
"There are two main categories for the souls. They can go to Heaven, or Hell." Victor answers smoothly. The professor nods approvingly at his answers, and Victor sighs in relief.
"Like what your friend said just now, there are two categories for the human souls. Heaven is for those who have accumulated more good deeds during their life, and Hell is for those who accumulated more bad deeds. Mind you, though, that sometimes, an anomaly can happen. For souls that defies this simple rule, they fall to another category. A special one, and not many know or remember about this, believing that as Death Gods, our job is only to reap the souls and send them to whatever is waiting for them on the other side. However, I hope that all of you here will always keep this in mind." The professor explains. "The special category we're talking about is Reincarnation."
"Can somebody tell me what souls are in this special category?" he asks, and a student at the front rows raises their hand. Victor, feeling secure of not being called again, returns to his doodles, tuning out the voice of the student who starts explaining eagerly.
"Reincarnation is for souls with special circumstances, in which they can be reborn and live again, although with different identity and in different timeline. Special circumstances here, unfortunately, can't be specified precisely because the one who can deem whether a soul is deserving for being reincarnated or not is the God of Life and Death. As we already know, all collected souls, before they go to Heaven or Hell, must be reviewed... "
He gasps in realization and looks at the God before him.
"Wait, Phichit… Are you going to do what I think you're going to do…?" He gulps, squashing the hope that rises inside his heart.
Does it mean I can meet Yuuri again?
Phichit nods solemnly, confirming his answer. "Yes, Victor. Yuuri's little soul here will have a chance to be reincarnated." He says. "I might not be able to interfere with Fate; you know, how a soul starts and ends their life, but I at least can interfere with dead or new souls. I am, after all, the God of Life and DeathS." He explains proudly. "So, yeah, I can give Yuuri a second life. Right, Seung-gil?" he queries, only to be replied with a scoff from the dark-haired man beside him.
Victor lets out a shuddering breath. He can feel wet tears flowing freely from his eyes, relief washes over him at knowing that yes, he can meet Yuuri – his Yuuri - again.
"Thank you, really. Thank you so much, Phichit." Victor says as he finally able to compose himself.
Phichit smiles at him. "Anything for my favorite human." He says, eyes gazing fondly at the pocket in his hand. "And also my favorite Death God." He adds, looking at Victor, earning a laugh from the silver-haired Death God.
He finally understands how it feels to live.
To be human.
And when the time comes, he can't wait to experience it all over again with Yuuri.
Victor makes his way through the crowd, skates sliding smoothly on the ice. His breath comes out in puffs, the chilly wind of December hitting his face, and he adjusts his scarf to cover his lower face better. The lights from the decorative lightings bounce around on the ice rink. He can see people laughing merrily around him, falling and standing back up again. Outside the rink, families and friends are strolling and chatting happily, shopping bags filled with Christmas necessities held in their hands. He smiles warmly and continues to skate along the smooth surface, looking up and admiring the mighty steels of Eiffel Tower above him.
He's in Paris after a task, and he decided to take a stroll around the beautiful city before calling it a day. He was in the middle of looking around the booths in the Christmas Village when he heard screams and laughter from the ice rink. Feeling whimsical, he went to the rental booth for a pair of skates, and now here he is, gliding effortlessly, lost in his thoughts.
A couple passes next to him, holding hands and giggling happily, and Victor can only stare at them longingly. He has wished so many times to feel another hand in his hold, to hear that sweet giggle in his ear, only to be brought back to the harsh reality that no, up until now, he hasn't met his Yuuri yet.
It's been years and years and he still doesn't know where to find Yuuri. Heck, he doesn't even know whether Yuuri is already reborn or not, because Phichit refuses to tell him anything, leaving Victor wandering around the globe with hopes of meeting the human in one of his tasks or vacations.
He had tried to ask Sara for any information about Yuuri, but the girl had adamantly refused to help him again. She said that she didn't want to face another one of Seung-gil's scolding (apparently Seung-gil had found out that Victor paid a visit to Georgi, and consequently, found out how Victor knew of Georgi's whereabouts). He also tried to request an audience with Phichit, which had been refused immediately by Seung-gil, saying that there's no rule that allows a Death God meeting the God of Life and Death, and that Victor should stick to the rule. Victor left Yakov's office sulking, but not for long, because a few minutes after that, his phone beeped with a notification of a message from Phichit's Japanese number. He reprimanded himself for forgetting the fact that he actually had the Boss' number. Ever since then, he and Phichit have been sending messages back and forth, with Victor trying to coax out where Yuuri is now, only to be replied with variations of "I don't know, Victor. If I tell you, it won't be fun, right?" by Phichit. Chris and Yuri only laugh at him every time he laments about Phichit's response, saying that it is high time for Victor to finally taste his own medicine. Well, he can now understand Yakov's feelings when Yakov scolds him for his escapades with human souls. Karma is a bitch, indeed.
He sighs and decides to go back home, skating to the exit door, when suddenly someone bumps him from his left. He is left sprawled on the ice, with the culprit falling down face first not far from him. Victor can feel people's stares on him and the stranger, but he ignores it and brings himself up. He then slides to the person who bumped into him – a man, he notices – and offers him a help. He leans down, offering a hand to the man who is still lying face down, profile hidden from Victor.
"Are you okay? Can you get up?" he asks in French. The man rolls around and sits up, hands rubbing his face, easing the soreness from the fall. When he removes his hand, Victor finally gets a good look of the man's face, and he can feel his breath leaving him.
In front of him, sits Yuuri.
Everything around him becomes blurry, and all the noises seem to fades away. Right now, at this very moment, there's only the two of them in this world. All that Victor can hear is his own loud heartbeat ringing in his ears.
His vision is filled with a pair of the warmest brown eyes that looks up at him in embarrassment.
And then, he sees it.
The same sparks like the one that he saw many years ago.
Finally.
This time, Victor smiles and speaks first.
"You have beautiful eyes."