Thanks so much for the support last chapter! Sorry this took a little while to get up, the website was down and I couldn't access my account! I hope you enjoy :)

Chapter 12

In the weeks following Christmas, the Mitchell sisters once again settled into their routine. Beca returned to her new work schedule, continuing to make enough money to support the two of them while also keeping her sanity. Macy returned to school after her winter break, the eighth-grader beginning to prepare for her transition to high school in a few months. Nearly one whole year after they left their last foster placement (CR's apartment excluded), Beca and Macy have finally found their state of peace, everything falling into place.

Which is why, after establishing this new sense of normalcy, Macy finds herself sitting in a white-washed office in the city, sitting crisscrossed on the couch cushion, while avoiding meeting the eye contact of the woman sitting in front of her.

She's the fourth therapist that Macy has met with, all of her options coming from a list that Meghan gave to Beca (apparently, their old social worker had been thrilled at the fact that the younger of the two Mitchell girls was finally pursuing therapy). After Christmas, but before Macy returned to school, Beca had carefully broached the topic, gently reminding her sister of their middle-of-the-night conversation that had happened a few weeks prior. It had taken a little more convincing, as well as some additional reassurance on Beca's part, before the first appointment was made.

They met with Alicia Curtis after Macy got out of school on her first day back. She was on the younger side, incredibly peppy and chipper in a way that gave Macy a headache. They didn't actually talk much, and Macy was just relieved when she was finally able to leave the appointment. Beca immediately scratched her name off the list and never scheduled a time for a follow-up.

Then it was Dr. Roberts, who was the complete opposite of Alicia, in the sense that she had absolutely no personality. In all of the times she's heard about therapists and seen them on television, Macy always just assumed that they were personable people who enjoyed working with others… but that was not the case with Dr. Roberts. They sat in silence for the entire appointment, the therapist only attempting once to try and get the younger girl to talk, before allowing the two of them to listen to the ticking of the clock that was perched on her desk for the remainder of the hour.

After the appointment with Dr. Roberts, Macy asked Beca if they could take a few weeks off of meeting with people. At that point, she was starting to feel a little discouraged and more and more apprehensive about actually committing to this whole therapy thing. She could tell that Beca was growing annoyed with the selections, too, which didn't really help, but Chloe or someone must have said something to her because the next morning, Beca was back to gently encouraging her sister to give it another shot.

That's how they ended up in Dr. Crenshaw's office, sitting next to each other in identical armchairs, the distance being a little too much for Macy as the doctor went right into discussing possible diagnoses, based simply off of what Beca told her secretary on the phone. She hadn't even given Macy a chance to speak, taking the majority of the forty-five minute appointment to discuss PTSD and anxiety disorders and "trauma-specific-care." All of it was thoroughly overwhelming and made Macy more anxious than she had been just walking into the appointment.

At that point, Macy had all but sworn off meeting another person. The constant introductions were exhausting in and of themselves, but the continuing disappointment of not finding someone that "fit", drained Macy of any motivation to try and do it again. Here she was, trying to do something that is supposedly going to help her, and she couldn't even get past the first appointment.

And Beca could see that in her sister. She could see how each appointment made her go silent for a few hours afterward, she could see the rising disinterest of meeting yet another person that held any sort of psychology license or anything of the sort. It killed her, especially considering that it had been Beca's idea and Beca's persistence that put her in those offices in the first place. But she made a promise to herself to do everything in her power to protect Macy and make sure she is safe, happy, and healthy, so she requested that they visit the last person on Meghan's list.

Which is why Macy is sitting alone in the office of Dr. Ellen Hansen, picking at the skin around her thumb nail, willing the time to move faster so that she can just go home.

Unlike the other appointments, Beca wasn't allowed to come in with her at first. Dr. Hansen had told them that she could come in afterward and they could discuss "next steps", which made Macy's stomach churn. But Beca had been reassuring, just like she always is, and told her that she would be right outside in the waiting room if she needed anything.

What Macy wanted to say, was that she needed to go home. She needed to go home so that she could fall asleep and wake up and have it be Saturday, when Chloe and Aubrey and Stacie are supposed to be coming over for dinner, and she can ignore all of this therapy stuff, hopefully, forever. She can say she tried, she can say that it just wasn't a good fit, and maybe Beca will drop it for another year or so.

They've made it eight plus years at this point. What's one more?

But of course, Macy didn't say any of that. She just nodded and followed the older, grandmotherly looking woman down a hallway and into her office. She stood awkwardly by the couch as Dr. Hansen closed the door and flipped the switch on a white-noise maker that is sitting just inside the threshold, waiting for instructions on where to go. The therapist hadn't said anything at first, simply moving over to the armchair perched in the corner, a still-steaming cup of tea on a small table beside the seat. She gave Macy a small smile, telling her that she could sit wherever – though Macy didn't know what 'wherever' really constituted, seeing how there was only a couch on the other side of the room, and a rolling-chair behind her desk – and followed her with a pair of warm, hazel eyes as the younger girl pressed herself into the center of said couch, playing with her hands in her lap.

That had been, what felt like, an eternity ago. But as soon as Macy chances a glance at the clock next to Dr. Hansen's chair, she realizes it's only been five minutes of the hour-long session.

Great.

After a major internal battle, Macy finally allows herself to lift her gaze to the therapist's, discovering a soft smile on her aged face. Her gray hair is pulled up in a bun on top of her head, her thin body comfortably leaning back in the chair. Judging from the multiple diplomas and certificates on the walls, the woman has been doing this for quite some time, and it makes Macy wonder whether she's actually aged from years lived, or if she's aged because of the job.

Macy fiddles with the two bracelets that now adorn her wrist – the one from her mom, that matches the one that Beca still wears, and the one that Beca, herself, got Macy for Christmas. She gulps, her heart pounding against her chest as she waits for the therapist to say something – anything – as they maintain eye contact. Macy can feel her palms growing clammy as she shifts in her seat, and Dr. Hansen must sense some of her discomfort, because her voice finally breaks the silence of the room.

"Hi, Macy."

Macy forces a small smile on her face, similar to the one that she gave the woman when they met out in the waiting room. Her answer is just as meek as the one out there, too. "Hi."

"Are you doing okay? Do you want to take a few more minutes before we begin?"

Outside, a chorus of horns emerges from the crowded city streets. It's a gentle reminder that, in order to join them, away from the walls of this office, she's going to have to 'begin.' With that, she just shakes her head. "I'm fine."

Dr. Hansen takes a small sip of her tea. "Great. Like I told your sister, this appointment is so we can get to know each other a little bit. We're just going to have a simple conversation, no strings attached. How does that sound?"

Macy shrugs, her heart rate picking up again. She may not be a regular with this whole therapy thing, but she doubts any conversation with a therapist can be classified as 'no strings attached.' "Okay."

She gives the younger girl another smile, perching her hands on her crossed knees. "Wonderful. So, I've talked a little bit with your sister on the phone. She sounds like a great girl."

Despite her nerves, Macy feels her anxiety lessen just at the mention of Beca. Her face flashes across her mind, and she can practically hear her words of reassurance echo through her thoughts. "Yeah, she's the best."

"She said you guys live on your own. That must be pretty fun."

"I guess." Macy wouldn't exactly call it fun. Sure, it's amazing and she loves just living with Beca… but it's not like her older sister is some reckless teenager that throws parties all the time in the apartment and lets her stay up late and eat junk food and do whatever she wants. These are the types of questions that the judge and the higher-ups at DCF asked Macy when they were making their decision regarding custody and guardianship. It was almost as though they were trying to catch Beca in a lie, like they were trying to prove that she actually didn't have what it takes to parent. And for some reason, Macy finds herself retreating back to the girl she was at those meetings, feeling the need to defend her sister. "She works a lot, but we have our time together, too."

Dr. Hansen nods, seeming much more relaxed than Macy is right now. "What do you guys do when she's not working?"

"Sometimes we play games or watch a TV show. She doesn't really like movies but that's what we'll do when Chloe comes over."

A small hum of acknowledgment comes from the older woman, the same kind smile playing across her face. "Who's Chloe? Is she a friend of yours from school?"

Macy runs her finger over the leather band. "She's Beca's girlfriend. They've been dating for almost a year."

"Does she come over often?" There isn't any judgement in her question, it's mostly just pure curiosity, and it puts some of Macy's nerves at ease.

Macy shrugs, once again meeting Dr. Hansen's eyes. "Yeah, I guess. She goes to school at Barden University, so it's mostly on the weekends when she doesn't have class and Beca doesn't have to work… but she stays with me sometimes when Beca's working late."

Dr. Hansen lifts her gaze to one of the diplomas on her wall. "Ah, Barden University… my undergraduate alma mater."

"I think that's where I'm going to go for college, too. As long as Beca wants to stay in Atlanta, I mean. Chloe really likes it and my Dad used to teach there." The admission slips from Macy's mouth before she can stop it. Sure, she's been thinking about it ever since they dropped Chloe off at move-in day, but she's never told anyone before. She's never even spoken it out loud, and somehow, Dr. Hansen got it out of her without even trying.

Dr. Hansen allows her smile to fall briefly. "Beca told me about your parents. It must have been very difficult to lose them at such a young age."

Macy goes silent, surprising herself when her throat doesn't tighten like it used to at the mention of her Mom and Dad. So, she presses forward. "I was confused. But Beca really helped. We didn't really talk about them much until after the emancipation. She tells me stories about them now, though."

"That's great. I'm glad you have some way to remember them."

"Yeah, I just don't want her to tell me about them if it's going to hurt her."

Dr. Hansen's head quirks to the side. "I'm sure if she didn't want to, she would tell you."

Macy lets out a small laugh. "No, I don't think so. She doesn't like talking about things that bother her. Especially with me."

"Why do you think that is?"

Macy, so caught up in the question, barely even realizes that they're starting to drift away from a 'simple conversation' and dangerously close into 'therapy territory.' "She's always wanted to protect me. Even before we went into foster care, she was always looking out for me. After our parents died, that desire just intensified, I guess. She's always put my needs above hers."

"How long were you in foster care for?" Dr. Hansen treads carefully, already knowing the answer to the question, but wanting to hear what Macy has to say about it. In all honesty, when she got the phone call from Beca Mitchell about looking for a therapist for her little sister, she didn't really know what to expect. Beca had told her about the younger girl's extreme anxiety and her tendency to panic easily, so she didn't even know if Macy would say a single word in their first session. She's doing far better than what Dr. Hansen could possibly imagine.

Surprising the therapist once again, Macy answers the question quietly. "Technically about seven and a half years. But we left our last foster placement in February of last year and moved into a kinship placement with our friend Cynthia Rose. So, closer to seven."

"That's a long time. How many placements were you in?"

Macy averts her eyes, returning to playing with her bracelets. "Eleven. Twelve if you count the one that I was in without Beca." She doesn't even wait for Dr. Hansen to respond before answering her unasked question. "She was in the hospital. Our social worker wouldn't let me stay with her."

"I'm very sorry to hear that. That must have been very difficult. How old were you?"

Macy can feel the tears pricking at the back of her eyes, but there's something about Dr. Hansen's calming presence that allows her to continue. "I turned twelve while I was there."

Just the expression on Macy's face makes the therapist ache for her. "How long were you there for?"

"Three weeks." Macy takes a deep, shaky breath, flicking her eyes back up to Dr. Hansen's. "It kind of messed me up. The separation and what happened at the placement before. I still have problems with it. And other stuff, too. That's why I said I would come here. To try and fix it. To try and fix myself."

Dr. Hansen nods, already becoming amazed by Macy Mitchell. She doesn't address her self-deprecating language; she doesn't address the foster placement that landed her sister in the hospital – all of that will come with time. Instead, she just keeps her voice calm, hoping that she's made an impression on the girl, just like the girl has already made an impression on her. "Well, I think I can help with that. Do you want to give it a shot?"

When Macy answers, her navy blue orbs are glistening with tears. But for the first time in the entire therapist search process, there's an undertone of hope written in her expression. "Okay."

"Are they almost here?" Macy throws herself over the arm of the couch, groaning as though she hasn't eaten in years. "I'm starving."

Beca lets out a hearty laugh, checking to make sure the pizza boxes that are stashed in the oven to keep warm, are not burning. "Aubrey texted and said they'd be here in ten minutes."

"But that was ten minutes ago!"

"Dude, you have Chloe's number… text her if you want the ETA."

Macy groans once more, making some comment about her phone being too far away, but Beca can't even hear her. She is too busy fondly watching over her younger sister, completely mesmerized by her carefree attitude. After her appointment with Dr. Hansen yesterday afternoon, Beca had been expecting a quiet evening spent with binge-watching a show on the TV and having her swear off therapy forever. But, much to her surprise, Macy seemed relatively calm coming out of the hour-long discussion with the older woman. She didn't say much, just that she liked the therapist and that she would like to make an appointment for the following week.

Beca instantly agreed, and they spent the next twenty four hours in a mutual state of contentment, a sense of peace that just felt so…normal. And Beca loved it.

Now, she can't help but laugh at Macy's complaints. Chloe, Stacie, and Aubrey, are on their way over to the apartment after competing in the ICCA semi-finals, the Bellas having managed to secure a spot in the final competition. While Chloe didn't say much on the phone, telling her that they basically made it through on a technicality, Beca is interested to hear all about how it went. With Macy's appointment, and the fact that this competition was two hours away, Beca really had no way to go and watch. Hearing all the details over pizza, though, is a close second.

Through Macy's dramatic complaining, mixed in with the music playing from their speaker, neither one of the Mitchell sisters hears the sound of the key in the doorknob, much less the sound of the three Barden first-years walking into the apartment. Chloe, Stacie, and Aubrey, have already changed out of their Bellas uniforms and are dressed much more comfortably in sweats. They watch the scene unfold in amusement, Chloe's smile widening as soon as she sees the two sisters playfully bickering in the living room.

"Should we come back, or…."

Chloe's voice interrupts whatever Macy was going on about, the younger brunette practically launching herself off the couch and into the older girl's arms. "Finally! We've been waiting forever!"

Chloe laughs whole-heartedly, looking over Macy's head at her sister, who is just rolling her eyes, adoration twinkling them all the same. "Bree, I thought you texted Beca to tell her we'd be here in ten?"

Aubrey holds up her hands in surrender. "I did."

"Oh, she did. Macy's just playing into the dramatics tonight." Beca gives each of the girls a smile, pressing a chaste kiss into Chloe's cheek as she makes her way over to the stove. "You guys hungry?"

Stacie kicks her shoes off, leading the way over to the table. Her and Aubrey have been to the apartment a few times, more so during the summer than recently, but it always amazes her how homey the small space feels. The pictures, the blankets, some of Macy's assignments hanging on the fridge from a collection of magnets. She still has no idea how Beca has done it… from actually getting custody of her sister, to being a better parent to the kid than so many adults that Stacie knows. It's nothing short of incredible. "Starved. I don't think I've eaten anything since this morning."

Aubrey sits down beside her, cradling her head in her hands. "Seriously. My stomach has been a mess all day."

Macy sits down in her normal seat after giving the other two girls a brief hug, nowhere near as heartfelt as the one she gave Chloe. As Beca and the redhead get plates, whispering quietly between each other, Macy tells Aubrey and Stacie, "well, we got a lot of pizza."

Beca glances over her shoulder, shaking her head at the fact that her sister is sitting down without a care in the world. "Macy, seriously? Did you ask them what they wanted to drink?"

Macy blushes, "Oops. Sorry, Bec. What do you guys want to drink?"

After answering the thirteen-year-old, Stacie and Aubrey watch as Chloe, Beca, and Macy, work around each other in the kitchen in perfect harmony. It looks as though it is the most natural thing in the entire world, like they've been doing it for years. The best part is, each one of them looks so happy; it's almost too special to fathom.

With Chloe, Aubrey, and Stacie almost instantly digging into the food as soon as it's on the table, the five girls eat quietly for a little while, each of them savoring the cheesy goodness. Beca is the first one to break the silence after wiping her mouth with the napkin. "So? How'd it go?"

Chloe shrugs, finishing the bite of her own pizza. She's been trying to wrap her own mind about how the performance went ever since they got off stage. It went as smoothly as it always does, but that's just it. There wasn't any excitement. There was nothing special about it. It was boring, and as much as it pains Chloe to say, she really doesn't think they should have won. "It was… fine."

Beca snorts. "That was convincing."

Aubrey rolls her eyes. The performance was perfect. They were perfect. She doesn't understand why Chloe is always so critical about their set list. "We were great. There was just a flashier team that went on before us."

"Who had a dancer fall in the middle of their set, which is why we won." Chloe pulls Beca's attention back to her, determined to make her girlfriend see it from her point of view. "We were boring. It was the same thing we always do."

Stacie takes a sip of water, smirking because she's heard this debate so many times before. "We were fine, but the High Notes definitely would've beaten us if one of their people hadn't fallen and messed up the rest of the dancers."

Beca grimaces. Yeah, that must suck.

"I'm sure you did better than you think." Macy's voice is quieter from where she's sitting in between Beca and Stacie. "And you guys made it through to the next round, right? So that means you can change it if you need to?"

"No. We stick to the Bella tradition. These songs clearly work, so we'll just perfect it a little more and I'm sure it'll be great." Aubrey is adamant in her statement, but neither Chloe nor Stacie seem convinced. Even Beca has fallen quiet, her mind occupied with something that she has yet to reveal to Chloe or Macy.

Chloe ignores Aubrey. "But if we just made it a little bit more exciting, we could be so much better. We could use more recent songs; we could upgrade our dance moves a little bit… we have the talent we just don't have the set to showcase it all."

Stacie nods in agreement. "Plus, we don't have anything to change it to even if we wanted. And Alice would never go for it."

Chloe is the first one to notice Beca's silence, especially on a topic so in her wheel-house like music. She nudges the teen. "What do you think?"

Beca meets Chloe's baby blue orbs, the slight jostle waking her from thoughts. Luckily, she managed to get the gist of the conversation, and gives Chloe a small smile, agreeing with everything she just said. "Based on what I saw from the Regionals, I think you guys have a lot of talent that isn't being utilized in the sets. And the songs are old."

Chloe rolls her eyes with a light laugh. "I knew you were judging us when you were watching."

Heat rises to Beca's face. "I couldn't help it! I thought it was really cool, the way everyone's voices were different and could form an amazing song. But you aren't utilizing everyone's potential."

Chloe, of course, agrees with Beca almost immediately. She's thought the same thing, especially when Alice always tried to hide the skills that truly set each person apart from the other. She has been so focused on unity, that she lost a lot of opportunities that would make them stand out to the judges.

As Aubrey stews silently beside her, Stacie slowly mulls Beca's statement over in her head. She has a point. A good one, too. "What do you think we can do?"

Again, Beca falls quiet, becoming suddenly much more interested in the crust of her pizza. She doesn't answer, not until Chloe asks practically the same question. "What are thinking, Bec? Do you have an idea?"

Beca knows that her face is giving her away, especially with all three of her friends, plus Macy, watching her intently. She runs a hand over her face, biting her lip as she meets Chloe's gaze. "I might."

Chloe's eyes widen. "Really?"

Without another word – just a simple nod – Beca pushes her chair out from the table and quickly makes her way down the hallway to her bedroom. She knows she's being watched, she knows that both Macy and Chloe are probably incredibly confused as to what is going on, but she can't help it. Beca has been working on this since Regionals, and only finished it last week.

After months of teaching herself how to use Luke's mixing equipment, and spending her long nights at the radio station trying to find different ways to highlight the Bellas' sound, she may have found just the right combination of songs, the right combination of notes and riffs and lyrics, to give Chloe and her friends a chance at winning Finals. But, of course, she hasn't shown it to anyone, mostly out of fear of what they'll think and as well as not exactly knowing whether or not it is as good as she thinks it is.

This is a completely different form of music than she is used to. She knows the piano like the back of her hand. She knows different types of music and what does and doesn't sound good, but actually creating this whole new song, manipulating it in different ways to make it a brand new sound, was foreign to her up until a few months ago. It was challenging and fun and kind of invigorating, but the fear of judgement and not having it be anything she's ever done before, is nerve-wracking.

Beca returns to the kitchen shortly after, a manilla folder in her hands. Macy watches her carefully, silently asking her what's going on, while Chloe and their friends have much more curious expressions on their faces. She hesitates for a moment longer, before handing the folder over to the redhead without a word, simply sitting back down in her seat and taking another bite of her pizza.

Chloe opens the folder in between her and Aubrey, Stacie straining her neck to see as well. It's relatively stuffed, a single flash drive on top, and a stack of sheet music underneath. Chloe puts the flash drive off to the side first, before taking the top sheet of music from the stack. On the top, written in what looks like sharpie, is a simple title: Bellas' Final Performance.

Her mouth drops open as she realizes what Beca has done. She doesn't pay too much attention to the lyrics scribbled underneath the various notes on each line at first, and simply scans each sheet. At the intricacy of the notes written, the precision. They're all obviously hand-written, taking who knows how long, and in the corner of each packet of papers, is the name of each individual Bella.

One for Stacie.

One for Aubrey.

One for Alice.

One for Jessica, and Ashely, and Flo.

One for Amy, and Lilly, and Mary Elise.

And of course, one for Chloe.

Completely stunned, Chloe looks up at Beca, tears starting to glisten in her eyes. "Bec, what did you do?"

Figuring it will be best just to get it all out there, Beca just lets it all spill from her mouth. "I've been thinking about your Regionals performance ever since I saw it. You guys are good. Really good. With the right set list, you guys can be great." She takes a deep breath, pushing the flash drive a little closer to Chloe, the one person she knows will let her down easy if it's truly terrible. "It's a mashup. It has 'Price Tag', 'Don't You (Forget About Me)', 'Give Me Everything', 'Just the Way You Are', 'Party in the U.S.A.', and 'Turn the Beat Around', all in one song. I made an arrangement that highlights each individual voice. That's the sheet music. The actual song is on the flash drive."

Chloe, too shocked to speak, just watches Beca in awe, while Aubrey continues to flip through the music, handing it to Stacie when she's done. "Beca, this is a lot."

Beca nods. "I know, and you guys don't have to do anything with it if you don't want to, but I've been working at it at the station. Luke has a whole bunch of mixing software that I've been playing around with and I don't know… it just happened."

"This is great, Beca. I don't even think I have to listen to it to know." Stacie finishes reading the lyrics, passing them back to Aubrey, who stacks them neatly back into the folder.

Beca just gives her a sheepish smile, before turning to Chloe, the girl who hasn't stopped staring at her since she finished looking through the folder. "Chlo?"

Chloe just shakes her head, a hand moving to cover her mouth, tears threatening to spill, before throwing her arms around Beca's neck.

Beca, slightly surprised by the embrace, accepts it gratefully, smiling into Chloe's shoulder. Her grin widens even more as Chloe mumbles into the crook of her neck.

"You're absolutely amazing, did you know that?"

We're coming up on the end here! About three more chapters after this one! See you Wednesday :)