Christian and Ava's relationship is based my own relationship with my maternal Uncle. He's a clown and the youngest in the family and I was the first grandchild. Even though he's 15 years older than me, we've had a rock solid friendship since I was 7 years old.
Ava is 5 years old in this story and about to turn 6 soon. I liked the idea of Christian having a friendship with someone who younger than him and was truly innocent to help soften him around the edges. Cause we all know that Belle is about to drag his ass through all of NYC – even Taylor won't be able to save him, LOL. In fact, he may just sit on the sidelines and give Belle pointers while munching on that popcorn.
Qu'elle soit emportée dans les nuages, dans les cieux
Let her be taken in the clouds, in the skies
Monday | Maldives
The ladies were sunbathing after breakfast. They were going to the first spend 4 days at the W resort and then the remaining three days Lux Male Atoll resort, along with doing a variety of activities in between. They would fly out on Sunday afternoon back to Dubai and then onwards to Turkey, spending a day in Istanbul before flying out again to head back to New York.
"Okay, I'm laying in the sun and bougie now. Tell me everything" Tamika announced.
Ana rubbed her face and groaned, giving them the low down on everything minus the BDSM. She had warned Alice beforehand that she didn't want to reveal that so when the time finally came for Ana to talk about this Alice, knew to keep it kosher.
"I'm sorry, but SCREW dat bitch." Deepi was breastfeeding Rohan but fully engrossed in the drama that was unfolding. "I don't care, you were there first. You have first dibs on everything."
"Deepi, you're so loyal." Ana laughed.
"TBH, I agree." Alice intoned and took a sip of her peach daiquiri.
"Ladies, that baby has dibs." Ana breathed out, looking away and trying not to cry. "Why would I take that away from another woman and baby? I'd be a hypocrite. I'd be the other woman in this case. She was his fiance first."
"Bullshit. He doesn't love her." Tamika blurted out after exercising silence for a record of five minutes.
"Tamika, LITTLE EARS." Ana scolded in return. She was sure that between Alice and Tamika, Belle was going to start cursing like a sailor.
"Oh whatever. They're gonna learn it eventually." She waved her hand dismissively. "Look, there is room for you both in his life. He can co-parent with her and be with you."
"She'll always be in his life and... I'm just selfish I guess. I don't want him to wake up one day and be like, you know, before... " Ana shrugged. "I don't want all that drama and— heartbreak." She whispered the last word quietly.
"Which is why you get that shit in writing." Deepi cocked her head to the side and pursed her lips like a sassy broad. "Honestly, after the shit you've been through... it's your turn to TAKE, Ana."
"That's what I said but no one ever listens to me." Alice interjected.
Ana didn't respond. She quietly looked at Belle sitting at her feet and playing with the white sand. She loved watching the sand fly away from her hand.
"Read his email, process it and then if he's saying shit you don't like... read him the fucking riot act and lay down the law. Tell him he owes you." Tamika wasn't going to stand for her friend to just meekly step to the side. She deserved happiness and love and she wholeheartedly believed Christian Grey had to pay his dues and make it up to her. Lillian Atterton be damned.
7:05AM EST
Christian had turned on notifications for the Christian Spencer instagram account to show up on his lock screen anytime there was an update from Ana.
christinespencer - Island Mama's and their island bebe's tamikainthecity deepi
#christinespencer #christinespencerxmaldives
The first update of the day was a picture of Ana and her friends in bathing suits, standing on the beach holding their kids close while they hugged each other and laughed. Belle was wearing a light blue polka dot, ruffled bikini while Ana wore a navy blue one piece. Most of her body was covered by the close proximity of her friends so Christian wasn't really able to get a good look but his body fully registering the sight of her in swimwear.
He shifted in the seat at the back of the SUV and tried his best to maintain some control. Just then he got a message from Ana.
7:10AM EST Anastasia Steele: [1 Video Message]
Christian opened the message to a video of Belle sitting on a picnic table and drinking coconut water out of a coconut.
"Chwis, wook. Bellie dwink coconut water." She gave a cheesy grin. Her hair was done in pig tails and she was wearing sunglasses with daisies around them that complimented her pale blue polka dot bikini. Christian laughed. Her cheeks were rosy red and her hands could barely hold the coconut.
"Bellie, tell Chris what you saw today. In the water." Ana's voice spoke in the background. "Tell him about the boat we went on and how we saw dolphins." She whispered.
"Chwis! Bellie go on boat. Bellie see dowfin." She clapped.
In the family group chat, Ana sent a video of her and Belle in frame, saying hi to Ava and wishing her a good day at school while sharing with everyone that they saw dolphins.
9:10AM EST
The second update of the day came in the form of a picture of Ana and Belle in the open sea water with their faces slightly submerged but only their eyes showing. It was a close-up and showed the intense blue of their eyes.
christinespencer - baby blues in the ocean
#christinespencer #christinespencerxmaldives
1:27PM EST | New York
Ana updated her stories with a mirror selfie of herself with Tamika and Deepi standing in white bodysuits that covered the entirety of their bodies.
"While the bebe's napped, mama's went for a lymphatic drainage massage. It was my first time and I feel like a whole new person. Tamika says this has got to be the best way to drain the toxins and drama out of your life and body. I have to say, I agree!"
About two hours before dinner, Ana took some time out to have a quick session with Dr. Vassar and get some help on processing the latest development in her life.
"Why won't you read his email?"
"What's the point?" Ana shrugged. "It doesn't matter if he doesn't love her, he should be with her."
"Doesn't his decision in any of this matter?"
"Did mine matter? He made the choice for me and I'm now making it for him. Except, I have a valid reason. The right thing is to be with Lillian and support her through this pregnancy. It is the decent thing to do. I don't want him to constantly have to choose. Belle has an established life, she'll be fine and she'll be fairly low-maintenance but a newborn baby will need both his and her parents."
"You should read his email, Ana."
"I'm tried of being hurt and him having power over me, I can't take it anymore Sylvia." Ana said thickly, trying to keep the tears at bay.
"He's not Morton who preyed on the vulnerabilities of two teenage girls and physically and psychologically abused you. Chris does not have power over you. You have achieved so much for yourself, all the power is your hands, Ana but you have to believe it."
"Even after all these years, his voice still rings loudly in my head." Ana confessed. "After my interaction with Lillian, it all came back to me with a force. Every single thing he would say to me."
"Look at what you've achieved in such a small amount of time, Ana. Surely that all means something." Sylvia gently reminded her.
Ana slowly nodded. "It's not just that, Sylvia. It's... " She swallowed.
"The BDSM?"
"Yeah."
"BDSM is all about consent. I will send you a few links for you to read and look over but for people who practice the lifestyle the correct way that is, consent is the cornerstone and foundation of it. It's another way for people to have sex. Again, it is very possible Lillian told you those things to rattle you. Her motivations seem suspect given how she accosted you. It was her clear intention to scare you."
"I guess but how can you punish someone with whips and belts during sex, that just seems so..."
"It reminds you of your abuse?"
"Yeah."
"But BDSM is not just those things. It's one very small part of that. The punishments aren't always physical and again, it's a dynamic that some people subscribe to. Should you decide to be intimate with Chris, you will have all the power just as you have had since he came back into your life again. He can try and seduce you but you have been able to effectively communicate that you don't want to go down that route." She paused for a few moments noticing Ana's confused expression. "I think you should definitely talk to Chris about his relationship with the lifestyle before you come to any concrete conclusions."
Ana pursed her lips. "I'm scared."
"He can't hurt you Ana."
"I know that. I'm just..." she paused. "I'm really trying to be that scared 10 year old."
"Ana, you've been able to hold you own so far. In front of him and his father. Who was that woman?"
Ana took a deep breath. "That wasn't me, that was Belle and Spencer's mother."
"Then tap into her and use her strength. You're always going to be Belle and Spencer's mother but you don't always have to be the little girl who was abused." She paused. "Moreover Ana, you need to talk to him and tell him what you're feeling. You owe it to yourself. Holding on to all this is not healthy."
March 2008
Stephen and Carla Morton had been foster parents for three years and had no real luck with any of the children that they had been sent. They were always either under the age of 5 or above the age of 15 and too far advanced mentally and emotionally to be molded into what they needed. Therefore, they never lasted more than a few months. The Morton's would make up some excuse to have them removed from their care citing behavorial issues or personal schedule issues. That's until Ana showed up at their doorstep with the social worker in September of 2005.
Ana was their jackpot.
She was submissive and quiet and she wasn't a problem child.
Carla Morton cared more about her pills and Morton cared about his gambling and beer. Between their vices and their jobs, they needed extra income and someone to clean up after them.
That's where Ana came in. Morton took pleasure in psychologically abusing her and in some instances exerting physical force. Carla couldn't care less.
Ana was not allowed to cry for if she did, it would mean no food but she couldn't help it. It would hurt too much. He was stronger and the pain would be too much and her body couldn't take it so she's silently cry which would piss off Morton even more.
"Don't worry, I won't touch you like that." He'd say after smacking her around and pulling her hair, drunk out of his mind and pissed off at the fact that there was a single unwashed spoon in the sink. "But then again, you never know." He'd laugh and walkaway.
In the three years she lived with them, it was a different kind of hell on earth. She had become too scared to tell or talk to anyone. What if the next house she went to actually raped her or chained her in the basement?
She endured this for three years and then one day after she came home from school, running as fast she could, she was met with something unexpected. The bus got into an accident and they were delayed which meant she was a whole 15 minutes late. After slowly opened the door, she saw Carla and Stephen looking rather presentable and sitting in the living area.
"Ana, you're home. Look, sweetheart, we have a new guest." Stephen's saccharine voice filled the room.
A social worker and a beautiful blonde girl who looked a little older than Ana or maybe even her own age, she couldn't tell, was sitting next to her.
Ana smiled and spoke meekly. "Hi."
"Hi! I'm Anabelle but you can call me Ana." She waved.
"I'm Anastasia but I go by Ana too." She gave a small smile.
As soon as the social worker left, Morton dragged Ana into the next room.
"Why they fuck were you late?"
"T-the b-bus had an accident. I swear." She gulped. Stephen searched her eyes for any ounce of a lie and then roughly let her go. "Tell her the rules and make sure she doesn't speak loud. You two are just paychecks. You need to act like you don't exist. You understand? Now go show her the spare room."
"Y-yes sir." Ana nodded furiously. He roughly pushed her out and Ana walked back into the living area and silently signaled her new foster sibling to follow her.
Ana's room didn't have a door and the bathroom's didn't have locks. The same went for Anabelle's room too. She whispered the rules to her new housemate.
"Why are you whispering?"
'He doesn't like noise. He wants everything dark all the time. Please don't break the rules otherwise he'll get mad." Ana pleaded.
"Does he hit you?"
Ana shook her head. She had been conditioned to lie.
"Don't lie to me."
"Only if I break the rules or if he's unhappy but I've learned all the rules and I stay out of sight. Carla doesn't really interfere or care. She's barely here though and she lives with her boyfriend. They're only together for the paychecks they get from the system."
They talked some more. Ana found out that Anabelle just entered into the system. Her mother was an exotic dancer or as she lovingly put it "a stripper with a heart of gold." When she was 6 years old she died of an untreated concussion from a fall while during a routine. Her grandmother raised her but then she died and her uncle didn't want to take responsibility so at age 13, Anabelle entered the system. She was beautiful with hair like sunshine and crystal blue eyes. She looked healthy. Ana found herself wishing she could look like her. Stephen had convinced her she looked like shit and wouldn't amount to anything in the three years she had been with them.
Ana could tell that she had the confidence and backbone to stand up to anyone and anything. Maybe having her around, she could learn a thing or two. Silently Ana prayed that she'd stay around for a long time. She was so lonely. At school she was a loner and mostly lost in books.
"I think it's cool that we share a name. We're namesharers. That's what I'm going to call you, Namesharer." Anabelle grinned.
However, because Anabelle was the complete opposite of Ana, it meant that she would receive the brunt of Stephen's physical abuse as time went on. She refused to silently submit. The first time he got physical with Anabelle, Ana tried to intervene he screamed at Ana, freezing her in place.
Late at night, Ana tiptoed into Anabelle's room and tried to check in on her.
"You can't stand up to him. Please don't. He'll keep hurting you." Ana quietly cried.
"I don't care. He's a fucking asshole. We have to tell someone." Anabelle said firmly.
"But if we listen to him and do as he say, he'll stay away."
"Namesharer, we need to get out."
Ana stayed silent.
Stephen kept them in separate rooms on purpose and would often walk around the house at night watching over them as they slept but he definitely showed a preference. He would look at Anabelle differently.
Four months into Anabelle living with the Mortons, things came to a head one night when Stephen flew off the handle for Ana burning dinner by accident. Anabelle tried to intervene but Stephen was too strong for her and it resulted dragging her to his room and locking the door. Ana tried her best to pry it open but she failed. Anabelle didn't scream for help once. Instead she kept telling him what a coward he was but then suddenly Ana couldn't hear anything. A few minutes later Stephen opened the door. His belt was unbuckled and he found Ana sitting on the floor nearby. Before she could get up and run, Stephen grabbed her by the hair and warned her.
"If you think what I did to her was bad, you will beg for death when I start with you. So you better not get any bright ideas. You hear me?" He snarled at her.
Ana nodded, trying her best not to cry.
"This little scuffle cost you both a week's worth of food." He pushed her down to the floor, fixing his pants as he walked away. For the week that followed, Ana and Anabelle were only given the choice between cat food and hunger. There were still three weeks left in the first day of school so they had to learn how to survive on minimal food till then.
Ana ran into his room and found Anabelle getting off the bed and trying to cover herself with her ripped dress.
"Namesharer, I'm so sorry." Ana sobbed.
"It's fine. It's not like I was virgin. I think the fucker was disappointed." She scoffed.
"Please stop Ana, I can't lose you."
Anabelle pulled her in for a hug. "I'm not going anywhere."
"Can you promise me something?" Ana mumbled.
"Yeah."
"If you feel like you can't take it anymore, take me with you as well?"
Anabelle nodded. "I promise. You're my ride or die, Namesharer."
Tuesday | Maldives
Belle was in bed with Alice watching cartoons on the iPad. Ana needed some alone time. It was a little after 7:30am. She sat by the infinity pool, looking out at the ocean. She had her phone in a her hand looking at the open mail app and stared at Chris's unreal email calling out to her. She took a deep breath and put the phone to her side and continued to stare out over the water. The sun was rising behind her and the world was waking up.
She got lost in her thought of Anabelle. It was her birthday today. She would've been 26.
"Is this seat taken?" A voice called out to her. Ana looked to her right and saw Nadine. She smiled back at her and shifted a little to her left to make room for her to sit.
"What's on your mind, Boss?"
"Stuff." Ana breathed.
"My contact got back to me about Bar Luxe. It is a BDSM club but the bar and restaurant is a front. All city agencies are instructed to look the other way when it comes to their building. Talk about influence." Prescott let out a sarcastic laugh, shaking her head.
"Anabelle was obsessed with wanting to work there. At the Bar and restaurant. She worked at the bar behind the bakery and one of her bartender friends had gotten a job there and said he'd make a $1000 in tips every other night. Anabelle was determined to get a job too but they would always turn her down. She tried one last time the night before she died." She shared with utmost sadness, remember the pep talk video they recorded. Anabelle always did things like that. Creating memories to look back on when their lives had improved significantly to see how far they had come.
"If Grey is into it, I can have my contacts look further into him." Prescott offered.
"Do I even want to know more?" Ana looked at her. "Do you think I'm weak for being scared of all this? I'm struggling and I have to think about Belle... I'm at a loss to be honest. I know I have to talk to him but fucking hell, I am terrified that I won't be able to handle anymore truth."
"You're not weak, Ana. Given your history, it's a perfectly normal response. I just hope you understand that you are not alone and that no one can hurt you anymore." Prescott assured her. She knew everything about Ana's history."Talk to him knowing you don't need him because that is the motherfucking truth. You don't need him and he can't hurt you."
Ana nodded and gave her a weak smile, trying to absorb the strength in her words.
Prescott was hired a little before Belle's first birthday. She was in the marines and had signed up for the training to be selected for MARSOC, however after the second phase of training she wasn't selected and opted to drop out completely and come back to New York. She went to college for a degree in Criminal Justice after which she applied to the NYPD and became a Detective.
Nadine Prescott was assigned to help find the stalker who had been sending disturbing packages to Ana's UWS townhouse. She had a P.O. box where she received fan mail and brand packages but after she made a politically charged video where she talked about reproductive rights, she started noticing a man who seemed to be following them in addition to the packages that would be left at her door once or twice a week.
Ana took to Nadine immediately and appreciated he professionalism and commitment to finding the man who seemed to be stalking her. They ultimately did and a restraining order was filed against him. Two months later, Ana called Nadine out of the blue and asked her out to coffee. She found out that Nadine had been passed up for a promotion for three years in a row even though she had a stellar record. That's when Ana offered her a job. Her subscribership and public engagements were increasing and she didn't feel comfortable being without security given the last two stalker incidents.
Prescott asked for a week to think about Ana's offer but after the promise of a 450K a year salary with benefits, a place to live and being allowed to call the shots, it was a no brainer. She gave her answer to Ana within 24 hours.
A year later, Ryan was added to their team.
"What are your thoughts about Sawyer and Caruso?"
"They're good. Sawyer and Ryan have some mutual friends in common from the service so there's that. Caruso is decent. She was on Mia's detail but added last minute to help round out the team and not scare your friends with two men watching you all from a far." Prescott barked out a laugh.
"Deepi would've loved it. She's already been planning an imaginary rendezvous with Sawyer." Ana giggled as Deepi's words came to mind.
Have you seen those baby blues and cannon like muscles? He fills out the trunks nicely too.
"He's easy on the eyes that's for sure." Prescott smirked.
"Nadine Prescott, who are you?" Ana dramatically feigned shock.
"I'm not blind Ana. Just calling it like I see it." She laughed and shrugged.
8:02AM
Christian went through the Christine Spencer instagram stories. The first image was of the open sea and horizon as the water glimmered a beautiful shade of blue. The text read "Happy Birthday Namesharer, I love you and I miss you." Over the clip, played the a song with the following words
j'ai l'angoisee. I have anguish in my veins
qu'elle soit emportée dans les nuages. let her be taken in the clouds
dans les cieux. in the skies
He immediately recognized the song and was transported back to almost two years ago.
October 20th, 2018
Christian spent the early hours of the morning sitting at his piano. He couldn't sleep. It marked the one year anniversary of when he met and lost Ana. Silently he wondered how long after they met did she die but he shook his head to rid himself of the thought. After he had finished playing her song, he looked over the keys, tracing them and replaying her voice and every word she said over and over in his mind. He missed the way she'd giggle and wink at him after making a joke. He missed her scent and the warmth of her skin.
Would this pain ever go away?
Looking at his phone, he noticed the time and the memory of her scolding him playfully came to mind.
It's almost 4:45am. You should sleep.
Chris, you need to sleep.
Don't pout at me. Go to sleep.
He looked around and saw how alone he was and reluctantly got up to try and sleep. The vanilla scented candle he had was still burning and halfway done. Sleep eluded him all night but he slowly got into bed and stared at the ceiling, imagining Ana singing to him. Something he'd do every night but on this particular day, it was even more painful.
Love feels nothing like heaven
Don't leave me here.
Hours later in the early evening, Christian was on his way with Mia and Lillian to the Grey's Westchester family home for a Saturday night dinner. The reason? The Trevelyan Grandparents.
News of Christian and Lillian dating each other had leaked and even though he had yet to make a statement about the matter, Elise and Theodore Trevelyan were determined to meet the woman that captured their grandson's interest after all these years.
They eventually found out about the drama that unfolded. Exactly a year ago when Grace found out, after telling her husband she still needed guidance. She turned to her parents who urged her to move forward with compassion. While Elise ran her mouth like a sailor and wanted to murder the bitch, Ted on the other hand felt it was necessary to let Christian know that he could rely on his family and eventually move forward with putting the bitch in jail.
Both grandparents had a soft spot for Christian. Perhaps it was due to his start in life and general disposition as a result of his touch issues. While they kept their distance, they still felt protective of him more than their other grandkids. Which is why they wanted a good look at this new woman in his life.
On the drive up to Westchester, Christian barely spoke. He was silent while Lillian and Mia made small talk. His siblings were still getting to know her so the jury was out. Still, they remained reserved. After everything that had happened with Elena, their main concern was Christian not being taken advantage of again. They still didn't know about Ana at this point. Christian wouldn't mention her until the following year when he started to officially spend one on one time with Ava.
Mia was in charge of music. She always called dibs when they were in the car together and no one was ever allowed to challenge her. She'd been playing DJ since her early teens much to Elliot and Christian's dismay. For this very reason they may never be able to listen to another Justin Timberlake song ever again.
Draps froids… Cold sheets
Où est mon amour? Where is my love
Je scrute les étoiles, des profondeurs dans la nuit. I scan the stars, from the depths in the night.
Hearing the lyrics brought a flash of Ana from that morning and how peaceful she looked. He was suddenly awash with intense guilt. Everything about the song seemed to encapsulate his feelings for her and the loss he felt.
Come back home
Just come
Home.
The song brought forth more feelings of suffocation. A part of him wanted to stop the car at the side of the road and scream out loud but he couldn't. It hit him again with full force that today marked a whole year since Ana and here he was driving up to his family home for a dinner to introduce to his grandparents the woman who he was now dating.
He had moved on. Couldn't even last a year and moved on. In the haze of things he found himself in a relationship with someone he had no connection with.
Maybe this was punishment too. Moving on and realizing how everything would pale in comparison. Nothing would ever match up to Ana or the potential of what she could be and the life they maybe could have had together.
Before he could dwell on his self-loathing any further, Lillian's voice broke through his thoughts.
"I heard a snippet of this song on Christine's Spencer's instagram today." She mused, looking out the window.
"Yeah, that's how I heard it too. She posted it with a picture of her best friend. She died a year ago today. It's heartbreaking. She's been through so much." Mia continued on sadly.
"I can't believe the father never stuck around. I mean she's gorgeous and her baby is beautiful—"
"RIGHT? I know. If I ever found out who her babydaddy is, I'd murder the son of a bitch." Mia meant every word of it. She too only had started following Christine Spencer since the foster care video had gone viral and started from the beginning and had become a die hard fan. "How can anyone just abandon a woman like that? Thank god she found her foster brother."
"Honestly, she should sue his ass in court. I'd happily represent her."
"I saw her at Whole Foods this morning. She lives in Tribeca now with her foster brother. She was holding little Belle in one of those cute baby wrap sling things. I wanted to say hi and invite her over to the restaurant for a complimentary meal but then I realized she might want some space given what today means."
Mia owned, with the help of her big brother, a small restaurant in Soho called Cafe Gris known for its laid back, americana-french vibe. It had only been open for six months and was doing well. After many years and courses at various culinary institutes along with working in some of the popular and upscale restaurants in New York, she was ready to venture out on her own.
"Kate was telling me she's seen her around the area too."
"Yeah same. I think we're all within a 3-4 block radius. Next time I'll approach her for sure. She's even more beautiful in person!" Mia smiled. She was smitten with the mommy blogger just as Ava and Kate were. "And Belle is… gosh I just wanna give them a big hug." She giggled.
"Youtube's listed her as one of their fastest rising stars. I'm going to keep an eye out. Pretty sure brands will latch on to her. With a face like that and cute kid. It's a no brainer. I'd love to take her on as a client. She'd be good for business." Lillian was on a roll at Carrick's law firm and she wanted to keep the ball rolling.
Mia frowned at that a little. It was her first glimpse into Lillian's thought process as a lawyer and she didn't like it.
Christian listened with mild interest but soon zoned out as they continued to talk. Hearing about a woman and her baby wasn't exactly riveting conversation in his book.
Lillian, as usual, was able to charm the room. Elise and Ted kept her engaged while Christian remained mostly quiet. He'd offer a smile here and there and answer when spoken to. During dinner, Elise decided to tease they new couple a little by inquiring about Lillian's preference for children and that Ava needed cousins to play with.
Lillian smiled. "One day, when the time is right." Christian's kept his face impassive but his ears had shot up. First the baby talk in the car and now this. She had told him she never wanted to have kids. Then what the hell was this about?
As the table cleared and Grace and Mia went to get dessert, Christian excused himself saying he wanted to show Lillian something around the house.
He took her out to the patio.
"You said you didn't want children?" He barked.
"I don't but I'm not going to say that to your grandmother. I told her what she wanted to hear. Calm down." Lillian admonished him. "It was general conversation. My grandmother does this to me all the time. You should be grateful she isn't here, she would've asked you to put a ring on my finger already."
"You need to go on the shot."
"Excuse me?" Lillian balked at the order.
"You heard me."
"My body, my fucking choice Christian. I can choose whatever birth control method I want."
"For someone who doesn't want kids you seem pretty reluctant with using a birth control method that's proven to be far more effective than the pill."
Lillian blinked nervously for a moment. She needed to keep him on the hook.
"Let me talk to my doctor about it." She offered. "There can be side effects and I want to be sure I'm not negatively affected."
"I know a good ob/gyn who can administer it. She's the best in the city. I'll have Andrea make you an appointment." He said roughly and walked off. Leaving Lillian with whiplash.
While Christian wasn't all hearts and flowers, they still had decent conversation and the sex was new and amazing, as restrictive as it was for her but still, she had to stick around long enough to walk down the aisle. She could do this. Eye on the prize, she told herself.
By the time Lillian caught up with Christian and entered the formal dining area. He abruptly excused himself citing a GEH emergency and asked Elliot to drop off Mia and Kate on his way back to the city.
He left in a hurry not giving anyone a chance to stop him. Lillian tried to cover for him but Elise had been watching them closely.
Christian barely cracked a smile when Lillian spoke. There was not even the slightest of physical interaction between them. Lillian seemed to initiate every time and she would notice his body go a little rigid but his face remained impassive.
Elise could see that while Lillian looked perfect in person and good on paper, there was still something fundamentally missing but like everyone else who had just been happy with Christian finally doing something normal, she remained quiet. Just this once, she was going to keep her mouth shit but not before giving her husband a knowing look.
Christian drove straight back to his apartment and drank himself to sleep to numb the heartache. The thought of him having children scared the shit out of him. Yet, a part of him wondered what it would be like if Ana had still lived. Could she have saved him from himself in the end? Could they have had a normal life and kids, picket fence, the whole nine yards? He closed his eyes and tried to dream but all he saw was pitch black.
A few days later, Christian got a vasectomy.
Present
Christian clicked on the Christine Spencer name and went straight to her feed to open the image showing the open sea and horizon.
"christinespencer - Happy Birthday Namesharer, I love you and I miss you #anabellespencer #christinespencer
You would've been 26 today. Here I am in one of your top five places you wanted to visit. I think about you, just like my darling Spencer, every single day. I see your spirit in Belle and all the incredible women around me but still, there is no replacing you. I know you are in heaven living your best afterlife like your favorite song and buzzing just like neon (the ep version not the album version. I promise I remember!) I often watch this video and wonder if you knew how things were going to turn out. You were right, our lives did change - so profoundly just a few hours after this video. God, I wish so much that you were here with me."
Christian swiped on the picture to see the next image which showed a selfie style video of a dressed up Anabelle and simple, barefaced Ana with a small smile and open hair, looking into the camera.
"October 19th, 2018. Remember this day, Namesharer. This is my third time interviewing at the swanky bar-restaurant place and I know I'm gonna get the job. Third time's the charm. They can't say no. I probably should've saved this $50 and not get my hair done but I know I'm getting this job. I can feel it." She looks at Ana who looks back at Anabelle and nods with a smile. "I know our lives are going to change. I can feel it in my bones Namesharer. SAY IT WITH ME." She cheers with enthusiasm
Ana giggles. "Our lives are going to change." She says softly.
Christian noticed how pale and weak she looked. She really did look so young but her eyes were still so beautiful.
"Look in the camera, we're going to remember this moment." Anabelle begins again, "We will look back on it years from now and celebrate how far we've come. From this moment on, our lives will be different."
Ana smiles quietly but it doesn't reach her eyes.
Except, just a few hours later, Ana would meet Chris and then proceed to lose both him and Anabelle in just a span of a few hours.
Chrisian closed his eyes and shook his head. When he opened them again, he saw how the post had almost 25000 comments. All wishing Anabelle a happy birthday and sharing their own stories of missing their loved ones. Some of which Ana had replied to as well, thanking them for their love and support.
Thursday | New York
7:30PM EST
Kate had invited Christian over for dinner. When she talked to him the night before and he confessed that he was missing Ana and Belle immensely. Mia and Ethan were a usual fixture at the Kavanagh-Grey household since they only lived two blocks away and they were obsessed with Ava. They made sure to have dinner with her once or twice a week and or pick her up from school sometimes. Ava loved spending time with her Aunty Mia at the restaurant and learning how to cook and seeing how food got made. She was Queen Ava of the Cafe Gris kitchen.
It was pizza night at the Kavanagh-Grey household with a generous side of macaroni and cheese courtesy of Gail that Christian had brought over. As conversation was buzzing around the table, Christian realized he hadn't checked instagram in a few hours.
He opened the app and saw a picture of Ana in a swimsuit. She was lazily sitting on a chair with her hand in her hair while her lips wore a smirk. She wore a bright red one piece swimsuit that was slightly retro in style. He finally caught a glimpse of her body and she looked amazing. It appeared that the 2.5 million likes on the picture also agreed with him.
christinespencer - Sinfully red in the sun. #christinespencer #christinespencerxmaldives
Christian's body immediately tensed realizing how many other people had seen this picture. While it wasn't risque, the intention was clear. What poured even more kerosene on this slowly growing fire was how his eye caught one of the comments on the picture.
Bradleycooper: sinfully a thirst trap, lol.
Christinespencer Watch it, Cooper ;) bradleycooper
Bradleycooper: see you at the gala, we'll talk about this!
Taylorswift: You can't sit with us bradleycooper right, christinespencer?
Lucifersdad: you can sit with me or on my lap, Cooper bradleycooper christinespencer taylorswift
bradleycooper - I knew it, only Jose loves me Lucifersdad christinespencer taylorswift
Christinespencer Hire me to make your wedding cake ;) Lucifersdad bradleycooper taylorswift
"Who the fuck is Bradley Cooper and why is he hitting on my woman?" Christian barked, startling everyone.
The whole table erupted in laughter and Kate held her hand out to Mia. "PAY UP."
Mia groaned and got up to get her bag while, Ethan and Elliot kept laughing. Ava got up as well and ran to the kitchen island as fast as she could, only to run back and place a jar for of money in front of Christian that read swear jar.
"What in god's name is this?" Christian looked at Ava whose eyes were twinkling. It was her lucky day.
"This is our swear jar. Whenever you say a bad word, you need to put money in it. Since mom says a lot of bad words it fills up pretty quickly and then at the end of the week, I get all the money. So pay up, Grey." She wiggled her eyebrows making everyone else laugh. Mia handed $100 to Kate who fanned herself for winning the bet.
Christian's face broke into a smile as he threw $200 dollars into the jar.
"DAD, I'M RICH!" Ava cheered as she high-fived her father.
"Come here baby. I have taught you well." Kate opened her arms and gave Ava a big tight hug that could cut off her air supply.
"What bet did you two have?" Christian was not pleased at this moment in time.
"A bet to see or hear of your eventual reaction. Mia bet you'd remain calm but let's be real Grey…" Kate snickered.
"Can someone please explain to me, what is going on? WHO is this Bradley Cooper?" Christian asked in annoyance. He was about to lose his shit.
"Your competition, bro." Elliot teased. Christian's eyes went wide. "Calm down, it was a joke. He was in the sniper movie we watched remember?"
"Does it look like I remember?" He spit out sarcastically.
Mia then showed a picture of him and Christian rolled his eyes. Sure he could see the appeal but he knew he was better in every way. The man's arrogance knew no bounds.
"There was a rumor that they were dating last year." Mia shrugged. Truth of the matter was that she wanted to see Christian squirm a little. It was about time they all had some fun too. "They went out for brunch with their little girls and were really touchy feely and all that."
Kate pursed her lips inwards trying not to burst out laughing at Christian desperately trying to remain impassive.
"But then Bradley Cooper's reps put out a statement saying they were just friends but if you see the pictures, it was clear he was smitten with her." Kate feigned nonchalance.
Mia quickly looked up pictures and showed Christian some of the paparazzi shots. They were images of them laughing and walking with their little girls. Eating on a picnic bench. Hugging each other.
Christian's jaw tightened and he ran a hand through his hair, taking measured breaths to maintain composure.
"Calm down, Grey. It's all fun and games. She obviously is not dating him or ever dated him, though you never know." Kate teased.
"Honestly, you could use some competition. You're getting a little rusty there." Elliot joined in.
"I hate you all." He grumbled and reached for his glass of wine.
Ava got up from her seat again and walked towards Christian asking him to lean down a little and held her hand to hide her face while she whispered in his ear.
"Ignore them. I talked to Aunty Ana and told her that sometimes you're a butthead but you really love her and you won't make any mistakes again."
Christian's face broke into a smile and he tried not to laugh.
"Thanks, Squirt. You're the only one who's on my team." He winked at her and continued to whisper. "I sent her a letter and some flowers. She should be getting them tomorrow."
Ava beamed and gave him a thumbs up for support.
Later than night, Christian made another mistake, blowing Ava's promise to shreds. He really was his own enemy sometimes. Impatience was his biggest flaw.
11:43PM EST Christian Grey: Read the email or I'll show up in the Maldives.
12:05AM EST Anastasia Steele: Steamroll Definition: to make sure something happens by using all your power. However in my book, it means making an ass out of yourself.
Christian's lips curled into a smile. He liked feisty Ana. He couldn't wait for them to get back to normal so he could push her buttons even more.
Anastasia's lips were doing the opposite. She had a furrowed brow looking down at the text message. Secretly, she wanted to smack him.
9:06AM MHT Anastasia Steele: [1 video message]
Ana followed up her message by sending Chris a video of Belle sitting at the grand piano in the resorts main lobby and welcome area. She banged on the keys and sang baba black sheep in her usual tone deaf manner. She was fully committed to the bit, wearing a teal green dress with her hair braided with pink clips fashioned as roses.
"Chwis, wook I pway piano." She clapped her hands and waved at the camera.
Friday | Maldives
After feeding their babies dinner and putting them to sleep. Ana, Tamika and Deepi got themselves ready to party. They had been staying in for the most part and having relaxing evenings after fully engaged days with different touristy activities. Alice and Deepi's nanny were going to stay behind to watch over the kids while the mom's went out.
Before Ana got ready to leave her villa, Sawyer walked in with a big bouquet of roses and a small package in his other hand.
"Sawyer, are you about to propose or something?" Ana joked as she walked into the main living area with Alice.
"I think my boss would kill me if I even dare thought about something like that." He laughed. Ana, Alice and Belle had broke down Sawyer over the past few days. Belle especially liked that fact that he was tall. Ryan jokingly admitted that he was jealous of the competition.
Sawyer placed the two dozen bouquet of red roses and a small box that looked approximately 8.5x11 in size on the coffee table.
"From Mr. Grey." Sawyer announced.
Ana swallowed and gave him a small smile, watching him retreat back outside.
"Damn, girl. Your babydaddy pulling out all the stops."
"I find it surprising. First he ordered me this morning to read the damn email on text by threatening to show up here and now he's sent flowers. Talk about whiplash." Ana mumbled.
"You still haven't read it?" She knew the answer since she had access to her boss's email but still asked.
Ana didn't respond but silently looked at the flowers and package.
"Aren't you going to open it?"
Ana shook her head. "I specifically asked him not to reach out to me while I'm here. When he was needed he was nowhere to be fucking found and now when I ask him for time and space he refuses to listen to me." Ana looked at Alice. Her face was tense with emotion. "Tonight, I want to just be 25 year old Ana. I don't want to be a mom or someone's babymama. I just want to be me and go out with my friends and dance and..." She paused and looked up to keep the tears from spilling out. She so desperately wanted to be young and carefree just for once. She wanted to dance to her hearts content and not think about all the crazy shit.
Alice walked over and gave her boss a hug. "Then you go out there and let loose. Not too loose though, not without me at least." She giggled. "In all honesty though, maybe it's time you did read the email."
"I know. Tomorrow. Tonight, I just want to be someone else for a while." Ana murmured and gave Alice one last hug before walking out to meet Ryan and Sawyer who were waiting outside the door. They were going to be her security team for the night.
Tonight, just for a little while she didn't want to think about Chris at all.
A/N: This isn't the last we've heard from Mr. Bradley Cooper. LOL, I loved writing that bit. This is why I love fiction. ANYTHING can happen.
Hit me with your thoughts, I'm eager to hear them.
Where's My Love – SYML feat. Lilly Kershaw
Leave Me Here - Hem