Hi guys I'm so sorry that it took me this long to publish this chapter. This chapter is more focused on the plot than feelings. I think I will update my other story Red Threat next week. If usual I apologized for all the mistakes, I didn't edit this chapter.

Thank you for all the reviews, favs, and follows.

Let me know if you enjoyed it. Thank you!

Chapter 11

After she was released from the hospital, Jane got a cab that dropped them off in her house. He came into her house with the excuse of helping her with her hospital bag.

Once inside, he asked for some tea walking to her kitchen—Lisbon should have known that it was a trick right then but she was too tired to notice— so she just pointed with her fingers the cupboard with the tea and teapot and went upstairs to take a long shower. Forty minutes later she came back to the first floor and saw him laying down on her couch watching TV.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm watching Roman Holiday," Jane answered pointing her TV with the remote. "It just started."

He was deflecting. She crossed her arms looked at him annoyed. "You know that I mean. Why are you still here, Jane?"

Jane avoided her eyes and focused on the TV screen again. "Do you really think that I will let you alone after you were kidnapped by Red John two days ago?"

"Jane." Lisbon started but he didn't even bother on letting her start her sentence.

"Teresa I'm not leaving you alone." He said leaving little room for arguing.

"I am a cop!" Lisbon remained him.

"And Red John is a psychopath with the intention of making my life a living hell. He kidnapped you just to toy with me, did you forget the letter?" Jane snapped, losing his composure. Lisbon felt a twinge of sympathy for him when she heard his words. She knew he'd worried about putting her in danger, but she hadn't realized how deep those feelings went.

"I want to be here Lisbon," Jane confessed. His voice was low and he was starring at her with soft eyes."I don't want you to be another casualty, so can just sit and watch this movie with me? please?"

Incapable of denying his request after that declaration, she went to her sofa and sat next to him in silence. He smiled gracefully and gave her the pillow that was on the other side. Lisbon settled down comfortably on the couch and tried to focus on the movie at first but the tiredness won and she ended falling asleep before princess Anne and Joe kiss.

"Dear, wake up." Lisbon heard Jane's voice from the distance but she felt so comfortable and warm.

"Teresa," Jane called her again and the brunette finally opened her eyes disoriented for a moment, she blinked a couple of times focusing on the credits rolling on the screen.

Lisbon looked at Jane and noticed how close they were, she was practically laying on his chest and his arm was surrounding her. He had slipped his arm around her shoulder. She didn't resist it which was already weird because hated to cuddle. In fact, she let herself snuggle into his side. It felt natural. It felt right. And scared the shit of her.

She quickly stood up. "I'll get you a pillow and blanket," Lisbon said going upstairs before Jane could comment on anything, meaning the fact that she had been sleeping over him.

The brunette walked to her closet and took a blue blanket and one pillow from her bed. Lisbon took a deep breath and tried to gain her composure before going downstairs.

She'd ignored the undercurrents swirling between them since before his confession and the kiss. What surprised her was the fact that Jane has allowed it but the brunette didn't know how long it would last.

What if they drove each other crazy in a bad way? What if he got bored of her, or he wasn't really ready to move on, or she couldn't be what he wanted? And those questions didn't include Red John or the secret organization.

Jane turned around the couch trying to find a comfortable position. The pillow smelled like Lisbon and he was to hype up to actually sleep. Too many things happened in the last couple of days.

The consultant thought about the woman sleeping upstairs sliding back down to rest his head on the pillow. He knew that they both had their issues to deal with. There would be a long time until she'd let go of her trust issues -not that he blamed her, on more than a few occasions he increased them- and she still didn't know what to think about his confession. Jane didn't think she knew what to think or feel about him when it came to Red John as well.

And there was Red John. Even though he wasn't planning on killing him anymore, he wasn't willing to let that monster free, he had to pay for everything that he had done in one way or another.

He also needed to make peace with the memories of Angela and Charlotte. They'd always be a part of him, and he would always love and miss them, but he had to be able to let them go. That was going to be difficult; quite possibly it would be the hardest thing he would ever do, but he owed it to Lisbon.

It was almost 2 am when he heard Lisbon, at first it was soft noise -mumbles that didn't make sense- then he heard a short scream that made him fell off the couch and hurried to her bedroom. Upon reaching the door, which was wide open. Jane surveyed the room quickly before entering and going directly to Lisbon's side.

"Lisbon," he whispered. Her reaction was immediate; she opened her eyes and took a deep breath. "Jane?" She asked disoriented.

"You had a nightmare," he explained. She quickly looked at her surroundings. After a few seconds, the blond saw the understanding reaching her eyes.

"I'm fine," she said but he could see a light trail of sweat on her neck and her eyes never lied; she was scared. Jane stood there for a moment unsure of what to do next, he wanted to respect her privacy but he couldn't let her alone when she was in that state, so he sat on the edge of her bed.

"Tell me about it," he requested softly.

She avoided his eyes but followed his request. "It's the same nightmare that I had in the hospital. I-I arrived at the CBI as usual but when I walk into the bullpen everybody is lying down on the floor cut up." Her hands were shivering and he took her left hand between his. Lisbon tensed for a second but she allowed it, that gesture spoke volumes about how upset she felt. "You, Cho, Rigsby, and Van Pelt were dead. Beltran, Haffner, and Smith were there in the bullpen with knives. There was so much blood."

Jane didn't answer just stayed there with her until she settled down, words were useless in this situation. He knew it better than anyone. Company was the best fix after having a nightmare like that one. More than once he had searched Lisbon's presence after waking up terrified in the attic alone. She moved aside, leaving room for him on the bed. Jane immediately lay down next to her and looked up at the dark ceiling without letting go of her hand.

They stayed like that for a long time listening to each other breathe. He has forgotten how nice it was to have someone that you cared about next to you. Jane impulsively brought her hand to his mouth, tapping her knuckles lightly against his lips— there was the briefest flicker of surprise over her face which disappeared as fast as it had arrived- and she pulled her hand away from his reach.

Jane turned, so he was lying on his side, his left hand supporting his head. "Why are you so scare, Lisbon?" He asked softly not wanting to break the mood. The night was quiet and they were intimate with each other, more intimate than ever before, including the kiss that they shared in the hospital.

Lisbon looked back at the ceiling considering her answer for a couple of minutes. "It's just that —we're so tied up in one another," she finally confessed breaking the silence in the room.

Jane looked at her curious not expecting that. He searched her eyes. "What do you mean?"

She sighed softly and Jane discovered that couldn't concentrate whenever she did anything like that. Teresa Lisbon should not be allowed to sigh. A part of him couldn't handle it. She always seemed so oblivious to the things she did to him, to the things she made him feel.

"Neither of us have a real relationship with anyone else. We stand as each other emotional support."

Jane had to agree with that statement but he didn't see why it was a negative factor as her voice suggested it. "Is that a bad thing?"

Lisbon looked at him struggling to find the correct words. She was afraid that what Jane was feeling now was just an illusion created under the hard circumstances that they were experiencing and once that they were free from Red John all those feelings would disappear but she didn't know how to express that.

"Jane our relationship is so convoluted that sometimes I can't work out who is manipulating who. Sometimes I feel like I'm not in control of anything, that I'm just your sidekick."

He opened his mouth to argue hating the way that she viewed their relationship but she interrupted him. "Jane you left for six months and came back acting like anything didn't change. Then Lorelei happened and I tried to push you away until you decided that you didn't like it and became my shadow but then Red John appeared and you pushed me away again until I was kidnapped. Are you sensing a pattern here?"

He had to agree with that statement. He was a selfish bastard and sadly she was the recipient of that behavior pretty often. "You're right, Lisbon. I'm sorry. I never thought about you before. So I'm asking you now, what do you want, Teresa?"His eyes stayed on hers, dark and intense. She couldn't remember the last time Jane had apologized to her—and actually meant it.

Lisbon met his repentant gaze, mouth slightly open in surprise. His words astonished her. Her eyes are wide and green and teary and beautiful.

Lisbon let the words tumble out of her mouth before she lost her nerve.

"I need time, Jane." She whispered.

"Everything is happening so quickly that I can't feel the ground under my feet." Lisbon stared at her hands refusing to look at him in the eyes. "We need to deal with the organization first, Jane. I can't think about anything else and... you need to deal with Red John. You can't pretend that he is not there."

Jane took a moment before he answered. "Of course. Work always comes before our personal lives." There was a slight edge to his tone, but he continued before she could call him on it. "I want you. That won't change but you're right. I'll wait as long as it takes to get your head straight and we will deal with the organization and Red John first." Jane finished quietly knowing he'd waited almost a decade already. He counted all those years, even when he hadn't known. What were a few more months or even a year or two?

She sighed in relief and surprisingly took his hand. He looked at her surprised. "Thank you, Patrick." She whispered and he had to resist the need of kissing her again after he heard his name coming out of her mouth. Instead, he came closer to her and kissed her forehead softly.

Her hand was now sandwiched between his larger, warmer ones. Lisbon dropped her eyes, not being able to maintain contact with his intense stare. He squeezed her hand one more time before letting it go.

"Goodnight Lisbon." He said standing up from the bed. He wanted to stay with her but she just asked him for time and he wasn't about to test his self-control after that conversation.

"Goodnight Jane." She mumbled closing her eyes. He smiled softly looking at the beautiful picture that she made before going to the living room.

He had some planning to do.

"Good morning, Lisbon." Said Jane from her small kitchen the next morning. By the smell surrounding the first floor of her house, he was making eggs and bacon.

"You didn't sleep last night, did you?" She asked already knowing the answer. his hair was all over the place and his shirt was full of wrinkles.

"Not rest for the wicked," he answered taking out the plates from the cupboard. "Now sit down and eat some of these delicious eggs that I made for you. We had a lot of work to do today."

She looked at him suspiciously following his request. "What kind of work?"

Jane put the plate in front of her with a hot mug full of coffee. "Food first, dear." He said sitting in front of her with a plate.

"Jane," She said finding his attitude annoying so early in the morning. Jane took a big bite of the eggs and denied with his fork. Lisbon rolled her eyes but tried the eggs finding that they were delicious. It was irksome how he was perfect at everything. After that, she cleaned the plates while he went to the bathroom. She ignored how domestic this situation felt and took her bag and jacket from her desk.

"So what's the plan?" She asked once that they were in her car.

"Well, we need to talk with J.J. Find out what he knows," Jane said.

She looked at him surprised. "LaRoche? Do you think that we can trust him?"

Jane hummed. "I'm not sure of anything but he's in charge of Internal Investigations. If he isn't guilty, he must suspect something."

"And do you think that he is going to say something?"

Jane smiled confidently. "I'll know it either way."

"Shush. Your ego is too big for my car." She teased him with a soft smile.

"Also I found a possible link to the FBI," Jane said smiling enjoying their bickering. He was glad that it hasn't changed.

She glanced at him curiously. "Who? Mancini?" It was the only name that came to her mind with the amount of time that Jane had to make a plan.

Jane stopped smiling and looked at her with displeasure. "What?" She asked puzzled. Lisbon knew that Jane disliked the FBI agent but she thought he could be helpful, besides in her latest poker games she discovered that he was kind of fun and loyal.

"No, he's Smith's partner," Jane grumbled. "Besides I don't need him sniffing around you." Mumbled under his breath hoping that she didn't hear him but they were in her car.

"He isn't sniffing anything, Jane." She said exasperated.

"Right, he just invited you to the poker games because he wanted to improve the relationship between the CBI and the FBI," Jane answered indignantly.

She blushed but otherwise ignored his comment. "Who is your link, then?"

"Last night I used your laptop." Jane started but she interrupted him.

"You used my laptop?" She asked skeptically. "You don't even know how to open your email account."

Jane rolled his eyes but didn't acknowledge her comment. "After some research, I found this office in DC. Far enough from California so they can't be involved with the organization. We will send anonymously the evidence that I found and wait for them to show up."

"Okay," Lisbon hesitated. "What about Red John?" She needed to know what Jane was going to do with Red John now that he said that he wasn't going to kill him. She still had trouble just formulating the sentence in her head, never mind actually believing it.

Jane stayed quiet for a moment. "Well, I'm ninety percent sure that he's one of the leaders of that organization or at least a member. Once that organization comes to light he will show his face. Meanwhile, we need to keep an eye on McAllister, Haffner, Smith, and Beltram closely."

The prospect of spying her boss was troublesome enough to keep her quiet the rest of the ride.

"You were right," Cho said giving her a folder. Inside there was a picture. Three black dots on Patrigde's shoulder.

The team was gathered in her office, Van Pelt and Cho were sitting in front of her and Rigsby was standing by the door. All of them wore different degrees of worry on their faces. Jane was standing by her side, he hummed softly and stared thoughtfully at the picture in her hands.

"Yesterday you said that you had a list of Red John suspects." Cho prompted looking at Jane. "What are the names?"

Lisbon scrutinized Jane's expression wanting to know if he was going to be honest with the team.

The consultant looked at the team hesitating about how much information they needed to know. "If I tell you those names. You can't tell no one."

"Jane we know."Van Pelt said seriously. O'Laughlin's face came up to Lisbon's mind. She knew that everybody in her office understood the importance of this situation.

Jane hesitated once more before giving up. Besides all of them were involved with this case."Beltram, Haffner, Smith, and McAllister."

Their reaction was immediate. Van Pelt and Rigsby opened their mouth surprised. Cho leaned back in the chair, his arms crossed over his chest with a stern expression on his face.

"So what do you want to do?" Rigsby asked after a couple of minutes of silence.

"Well the CBI director appears to be involved," said Lisbon feeling sick to her stomach. "That means that we have to go higher up."

"You want to take this to the FBI," Cho guessed.

"Yes, that's the plan," Jane explained. "To the best of our knowledge the FBI hasn't been touched by the Organization yet, but Smith is one of the Red John suspects. We need someone from the other side of the country."

"Okay, what about the suspects?" Cho asked.

"We will keep an eye on them," Lisbon said. "Discreetly. We don't need them suspecting that something is going on. Until the FBI doesn't show up there isn't much that we can do."

She finalized closing the folder. "Cho what about the case from yesterday?" The senior agent asked.

"It's a case about a company that fabricates drones for the government. The victim died during a car explosion caused by a drone. We interviewed coworkers yesterday. We can take care of it. You clearly have a lot of things to do." Cho answered standing up.

Lisbon was torn because while she knew that she should be working on that case, Cho was right, they had a lot of work to do. The brunette decided to trust her team, Cho was more than ready to have his own team. They could do it.

"Okay, let me know if you need a hand," Lisbon answered. Cho nodded and left the office with Rigsby following his lead.

"Oh before I forget it. Here's the address that you asked for." Van Pelt said to Jane giving him a piece of paper.

"Thanks Grace," Jane answered taking the paper. The ginger hair smiled softly before leaving them alone.

"Address?" Lisbon questioned him curiously. Jane stared at Lisbon for a moment before looking back at the paper.

"Sophie Miller's address," Jane said.

"Sophie Miller? Your psychiatrist?" She asked surprised.

Lisbon hasn't thought about that woman in years. To be honest there wasn't a lot to think about it; when brunette met her years ago while she had been a murder suspect during a case, the psychiatrist didn't cause a good impression on her. Sophie carried herself with an air of superiority that rubbed the senior agent in the wrong way but Lisbon kept her opinion to herself, and after she discovered how much she helped Jane during his breakdown her opinion about her elevated greatly but that was it. Jane never bothered to keep contact with her and Lisbon didn't push him.

"Red John is not psychic, Lisbon," he explained. "Think I know how he found out about Eileen Turner. The year before we met, I was on some heavy medications; pills for anxiety and depression."

"Do you remember much of that year?" she asked quietly knowing how difficult it must be for him to share this information with her.

"I remember stretches of time when I was doing better but other times…there were other times that are complete blanks to me." A minute passed, each of them quietly sorting through their own thoughts.

"You think that you told her about your happy memory? What made you think of her?"

"You know hospitals, nurses... Yesterday when a nurse came to check on you. I remembered her," Jane confessed. "And that's the only time in my life I can't account for some of my conversations."

"But how did Red John find out?" Lisbon asked.

"It wasn't exactly a secret that I had a breakdown; I'm betting it would be easy enough to discover where I was in that year. He could have visited Sophie as a patient."

Suddenly, their eyes met as understanding shot through Lisbon. "Did you call her?" She asked worriedly. The psychiatric could be in serious danger.

Jane nodded. "Yes, but she didn't answer. I left her a voicemail."

"Well let's go." She said standing up from her chair.

"First let's going to talk with LaRoche," Jane said taking the folder with the picture from her desk.

"Jane," Lisbon called him worried. He was evading Sophie's situation. The consultant ignored her and left her office. She sighed tired and followed him.

"Good morning J.J," Said Jane with a smile opening the door. LaRoche was sitting on his desk with a folder on hand.

"Mister Jane, Agent Lisbon. What can I do for you? I gather that you are not here to say hi," LaRoche said closing his folder.

"Well you are right," Jane said sitting down. Lisbon sat on the other chair quietly letting Jane run the show. "I was hoping that you could help me with this," the consultant said giving LaRoche the folder with the picture.

LaRoche frowned but took the folder. Both of them watched carefully the man looking for any sign of deception. When LaRoche opened the folder, his reaction was immediate he paled– then stared at them.

"So you know about this," Jane concluded.

"What's going on, LaRoche?" She fished wanting to find out what the agent knew about the organization.

"Don't lie to us," Jane interrupted him when the man opened his mouth. "Don't you even think about it."

"I wasn't thinking about it," said J.J. with a frown. With a short intake of breath, he unbuttoned his shirt. LaRoche bared his shoulder for them to see – and indeed, there wasn't a trace of the tattoo. Lisbon felt a huge relief when she saw LaRoche's bare shoulder. At least they had an ally in the middle of this mess.

"Four months ago I was contacted by a man from Homeland Security. Agent Kirkland– apparently they had found hints of suspicious activity amongst the CBI. My position in Internal Affairs was ideal for investigating work. But agent Kirkland was arrested and died before they could start the investigation."

"But you suspected that something was happening before Kirkland approached you, right?" Jane guessed without taking his eyes out of the agent.

LaRoche sighed tiredly." Yes. I had a strong suspicion that there was a mole inside of the CBI. How did you find out this?"

"Kirkland." Lisbon finally confessed. " We were able to connect the dots after discovering the tattoo."

J.J looked at them for a moment before focusing on Jane. "I take it you had a hand in that?"

Jane smiled and laid back on the chair with an air of satisfaction. "Actually, it was Lisbon who made the connection."

LaRoche looked at her with kind eyes. "I'm not surprised. I glad that you're with us, agent Lisbon." He said softly. His words were sincere and the brunette appreciated them deeply. Their relationship wasn't the smoothest or easiest but there was respect on both sides. "So what do you want to do with this information?"

Jane gave him a smile that she came to associate with trouble. "I was hoping that you ask that."

"Her mail is piling up," she commented looking at the mail on the floor of her porch. Jane knocked on the door then looked through the window.

"It looks empty," he said.

"What do you want to do?" She asked. He looked around The neighborhood and then picked up the door lock.

"Jane," she exclaimed pulling his arm away from the lock.

He looked at her seriously but didn't pull away. "We don't have to any real evidence besides a hunch, there no way that we are going to get an order." He pushed the door open and gestured her to go through. She rolled her eyes annoyed but walked in.

Inside the house was organized but there was light dust over the tables and Lisbon had a bad feeling about this. Jane walked looking around and went to the kitchen. She looked around Sophie's desk finding that she had a couple of messages on her voicemail machine, she heard the fridge door opened and closed.

"Lisbon," Jane screamed, she ran to the kitchen and saw him resting against the sink with a terrifying expression on his face. She walked to him and Jane's arms snaked around her, hooked tightly around her waist.

"Jane," she called him concerned. "What happened? Jane, talk to me."

"Sophie," he whispered. Lisbon pulled away and looked at his eyes, they were wild. She followed his sight and to her horror found Sophie's head inside of the oven.

She quickly looked away. "Oh god."

He pulled her into his embrace again, holding her so tightly she could barely breathe. She could feel his heart pounding and the way his breathing hitched as if he were on the verge of tears.

She just rubbed soothing circles on his back, then slid a hand into his curls, massaging his scalp. He buried his face in her neck, his breaths puffing against her skin. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes while he gained control of his emotions.

Finally, he pulled away and Lisbon saw the fear returned to his eyes. He was scared of this situation and he was allowing her to see it.

Jane just focused on the women in front of him.

He would never be able of letting her out of his sight again.

He could lose her to that monster.