Chapter 25, woo! For anyone still reading this (and to those of you who are, thank you for bearing with me!), I apologize for the wait; a lot of things have been happening in my life lately and writing sort of fell by the wayside. It's difficult to come back after a week or so and remember where I was and where things were going.
That being said, thank you so very much to everyone who has reviewed the recent chapters! Whenever I am too tired or don't feel like writing, the thought of my kind reviewers gets me off my lazy, uninspired butt :)
This chapter was inspired by the song 'She Lit A Fire' by Lord Huron from their 2012 album 'Lonesome Dreams'.
Disclaimer: I don't own A:TLA or any of the songs I use for inspiration.
Hope you enjoy this chapter! Don't be afraid to leave a review (please?)!
Chapter 25: She Lit A Fire
…
When last I saw her she was dancing all alone
Perhaps my chance was then, I'll never know
I'll search the world until there's no place left to go
And if she leaves it, I will follow
…
She lit a fire, but now she's in my every thought
…
The fire crackled, sending sparks up into the night sky as Katara portioned out rice and vegetables into dishes. Her friends sat around the campfire, watching the flames in silence. No one had spoken much at all since they arrived at the campsite. The situation was rather awkward and seemed to be weighing down on everyone's minds. All but Aang had agreed that going into Fire Nation territory was a bad idea, regardless of how important it was that the Avatar commune with his past life. Now, the airbender was alternatively wringing his hands and crossing his arms, avoiding eye contact with the rest of the group.
Katara felt sorry for him. She could guess how he must be feeling; like his friends had turned against him – particularly after witnessing his transition into the Avatar State and the resulting destruction he had wreaked on the Earth Kingdom fortress. Toph, for all her wit and sarcasm, seemed to be tiptoeing around the airbender, while Sokka and Suki had long since stopped trying to cheer him up. Aang nodded thanks when Katara handed him a bowl of food, but his gaze never rose to meet hers.
Truthfully, seeing her friend in the Avatar State had scared her. He wasn't himself. He had no control over his actions and only a fragmented memory of what had happened. The desolation he had caused was so out of character for the peace-loving young monk, she found it hard to believe that he was the same person; the experience had created a dichotomy in Katara's mind that she couldn't ignore. She had a hard time not seeing his glowing eyes and tattoos every time she glanced his way over the rim of her rice bowl.
They ate in relative silence as well, which was particularly unusual because Sokka would normally be complaining about the lack of meat in their diets by this point. After the meal, they piled up their empty dishes and Katara went about washing the remaining bits of food from their dinnerware.
"I'm going to bed," Aang said, abruptly getting to his feet and turning away from the group as he made his way over to Appa. Katara wanted to say something – to stop him, to comfort him – but her previous attempts had done little to calm the airbender. They watched him go in silence. It wasn't until he was out of earshot that Sokka turned to Katara.
"I know you and Aang are close," Her brother started, "But you really do need to be more careful, Katara. You could have been hurt really bad."
"But I wasn't," She replied dismissively, rinsing rice out of a bowl with a swipe of her hand. "Aang wouldn't hurt me."
"Maybe not on purpose," Sokka countered, "But when he's in the Avatar State he isn't in control. You need to be more careful!"
"Sokka, I'm fine."
"You've been lucky," He furrowed his brow. "You've been really lucky lately. But luck can only get you so far."
"What are you saying?" Katara snapped back. She didn't like that her brother had shattered the silence to chastise her.
"I don't know, Katara… it just seems like… now that you've gotten better at waterbending… I can't protect you anymore. I promised Gran Gran that I'd keep you safe, but you keep putting yourself in danger and there's nothing I can do about it. It just makes me feel like I'm failing as a big brother."
"What? Sokka, that's crazy. You're not failing."
"But you're my little sister and I haven't been able to protect you at all. What would Gran Gran, or even worse, the men of the tribe think if they knew that the Fire Nation prince kidnapped you on my watch? Or that I let you get burnt by that soldier? Or what about just now when I left and you got beaten up by the Earth Kingdom General and Aang!" Sokka waved his arms around emphatically, "I couldn't even protect you from your own friend!"
"Don't be ridiculous, Sokka. There's nothing you could have done about any of that. Besides, I'm not the same person I used to be back at the South Pole… and I don't really care about what the tribe would think about it."
It was a lie, really. Upon leaving the Southern Water Tribe, Katara had found a new sense of self; a confidence, an independence, and a determination she didn't know she possessed. Freed from the restraint of expectation, she was able to blossom into a version of herself that had long been trapped inside. However, as much as she wanted to separate herself from the expectations of her people – that she find a warrior to wed and start having children sooner rather than later – she couldn't quite forsake the customs of her tribe so easily.
Truthfully, she felt a tinge of guilt when she wondered what her father would say if he knew that she had disobeyed him and left the South Pole; that she was traveling the world with the Avatar. Worse yet, what would he say if he knew about her affiliation – in simple terms – with Zuko? Romance with anyone outside of the water tribe was practically unheard of in her village, with the only exception being relationships that occurred between the Northern and Southern tribes – as had apparently been the case with Gran Gran. While her father was a reasonable man, he was also the chief of the Southern Tribe and propriety required him to uphold tradition.
Even so, the look her brother gave her was one of incredulity. "I still care about what the tribe thinks. They're our people, Katara. And they'll never see me as a warrior if I can't even protect my own baby sister."
Katara's gaze shifted to her hands and Suki took the opportunity to interject. "Katara isn't a baby anymore, Sokka. She's a woman now. Women can be warriors too."
"I-I know," He responded quickly, throwing out his arms in defense, not wanting to get into this conversation again with his girlfriend. "Just, please… at least try to be a little more careful?"
"I'll try," Katara exhaled.
"That's all I ask," Her brother stood and stretched with a yawn. "All that time in Appa's saddle has tired me out. I'm going to head to bed too." He looked over at Suki, expecting her to come along.
"I'll be there soon," the Kyoshi Warrior said, not looking up.
With a defeated slump of his shoulders, Sokka headed over to one of the tents, knowing he was likely to get an earful from Suki later about patronizing his sister.
Suki flashed Katara a grin when her brother had left. "So, I hear that Toph delivered a message to you from the Prince…"
Caught off guard, Katara turned to look at the blind girl who had been quietly picking at her toes. "You- who else have you told?" She hissed.
"Whoa, calm down there, Princess," Toph replied. "No one told me it was a secret. I didn't tell anyone else."
"What did it say?" Suki perked up, her excited grin growing by the second.
With a sigh, Katara pulled the scroll from her tunic and handed it over to her friend. The Kyoshi Warrior unrolled the piece of paper and seemed to be holding her breath as she read.
After a moment, Toph huffed, "Well? What does it say?"
Suki cleared her throat, trying to suppress her smile. "I won't let you go again… See you soon."
"I knew it was a love letter," the blind girl smirked.
"What does he mean by 'I won't let you go again'?"
Katara couldn't hide the blush that colored her cheeks at hearing the words out loud. Luckily, Suki was the only one present who could see. "Well, when I saw him last- before we went to Fong's Fortress, when we, um… kissed," She whispered the word, but Toph's hearing was impeccable and she cringed when the earthbender suddenly looked up, eyebrows raised. "He said that trying to use me to set a trap for Aang wouldn't work… because he wouldn't let me go again."
The Kyoshi Warrior all but squealed at the juicy details and Toph's smirk widened.
"I asked him to join us… But he never really gave me an answer."
"He did help us escape those Fire Nation soldiers though," Suki thought aloud. "Do you think he might switch sides?"
"I-I'm not sure… I hope so." She gave the Kyoshi a sheepish smile.
"Princey also helped me and the rest of the Kyoshi Warriors free all the other kids from Gao Ling," Toph added.
"He did?" Suki and Katara asked simultaneously. Toph nodded, returning to her toes.
"What will you do if he does join us?" Suki turned to Katara with a teasing grin. "Kiss him again?"
"Probably," She simpered, still flustered. Talking with Suki like this was a nice reprieve from the normal stress of their travels, but the rosy feeling didn't last long as reality dawned on her once more. What would she do if Zuko joined them? Would she be forced to confront her brother and Aang about her feelings for him?
"Would you tell your brother and Aang?" Suki seemed to read her mind.
"I don't know… What would I even tell them? It's not like we're in a relationship or anything- we just kissed. I don't even know for sure that he feels the same about me…"
"He does." The Kyoshi responded bluntly.
"How do you know?"
"It's painfully obvious just by the way he looks at you," Suki chuckled. "It's like his face softens and he doesn't look so angry anymore. And he sent you that note…"
"I don't know…" Katara averted her gaze.
Toph laughed from her place across the fire pit, "I thought I was supposed to be the blind one."
Katara turned towards the blind girl and furrowed her brow.
"Don't get your bindings in a knot, Princess," Toph joked before she could respond. "I've known ever since he said your name- his heart was beating like a drum. Suki is right, it's painfully obvious that you two are a couple of lovebirds."
Katara's face flushed a dark shade of red again. "Please, don't tell anyone…"
"Who do I have to tell? I just find it amusing," The earthbender replied. "I was wondering though… is he hot?"
Suki burst into laughter and Katara dropped her head in embarrassment.
"C'mon, I can't see," Toph whined playfully. "I thought that he kind of seemed like the handsome brooding type."
Suki laughed even harder, gripping at her abdomen. "Are you sure you're blind? I'd say that's pretty on point. He's handsome if you're into the whole 'bad-boy with battle scars' type, like Katara."
"Can we stop talking about this now?" Katara crossed her arms in attempt to hide her humiliation.
"We're just having some fun," Suki tried to suppress her laughter. "But we'll lay off for now, right Toph?"
"I guess," The blind girl shrugged.
"Thanks," Katara sighed. She glanced over at Toph, who was once again entirely concentrated on her toes, and stood, stretching out her limbs. "I think I'm going to go to bed now."
As she laid down in her bedroll, she clutched the note from Zuko to her chest.
I won't let you go again.
She turned her glacier blue gaze to the stars twinkling above. Please don't, she thought with a wavering sigh. Never again.
…
The palace gardens were full of mourners dressed in white, mumbling amongst themselves as they floated listlessly between flower beds and rose bushes. A visceral tension hung in the air, a sense of unease that permeated even the most unflappable military officials in attendance. It was clear in the darting eyes of governors, the furrowed brows of industry giants, the murmurs of noblewomen: something strange and unprecedented was going on and the future of the Fire Nation hung in the balance.
Zuko had quickly learned earlier that morning to avoid making eye contact with any of the nobles lest they stop him to share their words of sympathy, sentiments that only seemed to accentuate the confusion and anger that had been simmering beneath the surface for weeks. Keeping his gaze on his feet, he shuffled through the crowded gardens towards the line of nobles offering their condolences to his father and uncle.
Walking alongside the queue of noble families, Zuko caught the gaze of one of Azula's friend's, Mai. As soon as their eyes met, she glanced away, a faint pink coloring her pale cheeks. Zuko scowled, not understanding why the infuriating girl always sought him out only to pretend she had never seen him. His annoyance was shelved, however, when he heard Mai's mother, Michi, muttering to another noblewoman he didn't recognize.
"To lose both the Fire Lord and Prince Lu Ten in a matter of weeks and so suddenly, too… it's truly tragic."
"Not to mention the news of Princess Ursa," The other woman agreed, glancing over to Zuko's father.
Michi's eyes widened and she grasped the other noblewoman's sleeve as she leaned in, her voice low. "Chira!" She admonished, "Guard your tongue. Giving voice to such rumors is not likely to earn you favor in the capitol." Zuko strained to hear the rest of their hushed conversation, but his mother's name was not mentioned again.
Wondering what the women might be referring to, he continued towards the front of the line where the body of his late grandfather, Fire Lord Azulon, lay on display for his many noble subjects. The stench of heavily scented incense and oils, masking a much more putrescent odor beneath, reached his nose before he saw the lifeless body of the once mighty Fire Lord, a man who had frightened Zuko for as long as he could remember. Now, however, his austere grandfather looked to be almost peaceful, the unsympathetic frown that so often wrinkled his brow had been replaced by a visage of tranquility. Zuko couldn't help but think he looked like an entirely different man in death.
The regal white ensemble that his uncle Iroh donned appeared to accentuate the blotchy redness that colored the whites of his eyes and the skin around his nose from weeks of grieving. His father, though, also dressed in full regalia, seemed as impassive and unfazed as ever, watching as a noble couple bowed before him, offering their condolences for his loss. Zuko had hardly seen his father as of late and the notion that he might finally get some answers loosened his tongue.
"Where is she?" He bounded up to his stony-faced father. "Where is mother? What happened to her?"
Ozai grimaced, attempting to placate his son with a tight lipped, "This is not the time, Zuko."
"Please!" Zuko raised his voice above the hum of murmuring nobles. "No one will tell me anything. I haven't seen mother in weeks!"
If Ozai had any patience to begin with, it seemed that this was all it took to drain him of tolerance. With a low growl, he stalked towards his son. "Have you no respect, boy?" He snarled, grasping Zuko by the shoulder, his fingertips digging painfully into Zuko's flesh.
Zuko cried out in pain and distress, which only seemed to make his father angrier. "Wh-where is sh-she?" He started to sob, tears streaming down his cheeks. Mourners were watching them now, having ceased their hushed dialogue in favor of witnessing the scene unfold before them, and Zuko found himself being dragged away from the wake.
His father turned a sharp corner and Zuko collided bodily with a stone pillar that lined the walkways of the inner palace. Once they were away from the funeral precession, his father threw him to the ground.
"You dare mention that insufferable woman in front of all those people?" His father seethed, a glimmer of malice flashing in his fiery eyes. "You are an embarrassment and a disgrace. And I'm starting to think that you aren't even mine."
"I- I just… want to kn-know where she is," Zuko stammered through tears, pushing himself up to his hands and knees.
His father's nostrils flared as he approached the child. Zuko instinctively shied away, scrambling backwards, but his father was not to be deterred by his son's evident fear. Reaching down to grab Zuko's upper arm, he hauled the boy up to face-level and hissed, "You want to know where your retched mother is?"
Despite his terror, Zuko met his father's gaze and nodded.
"She's gone."
A sudden burning sensation spread through his arm, searing the skin where his father's hand gripped down like a vice. He gasped and winced in pain, "No!" It was the only thing he could say. "No… No… No!"
In one swift motion, his father lifted him entirely from the ground and threw his body towards the wall.
Zuko jolted upright just before the impact, gasping for breath. A cold sweat glistened on his skin in the pre-dawn light as he struggled to regain his senses. It was the sound of his uncle's snoring nearby that brought him back to reality. Gradually, awareness returned to him as the hum of the forest drowned out the echoes from his dream and the scent of the damp forest floor filled his nostrils.
That dream… that had been the first time his father hit him. Once again, he was overcome with a strange feeling, like he was reliving the memory, experiencing every emotion as intensely as if for the first time. He exhaled the breath he didn't realize he had been holding and flopped down again on his back, determined to calm himself down.
The moon and stars hovered above as they steadily dissolved into the faint light that was growing in the east. Unbidden, Katara meandered into his thoughts and he found himself simultaneously relieved and dismayed that just the thought of her seemed to mollify his anxiety. He closed his eyes and saw her smile; the corners of her almond-shaped eyes crinkling cheerfully, the alluring curl of her lips and the rose-colored tint in her cheeks. He felt her fingertips brush against his scar, sending a warm tingling sensation down his spine. The details of his dream drifted away as sleep took hold of him once more.
…
Clouds must have rolled in sometime during the night, blanketing the western shore of the Earth Kingdom in a cool, gray mist. They sat atop Appa's saddle as the bison coasted through the low-lying clouds. Katara was back to occupying her time with waterbending, pleased to wield her element around herself freely once more as she pulled water from the waterskin at her waist. Aang's back was turned to the rest of them as he guided Appa through the thick moisture that hung in the air.
"So, um… where are we going?" Toph broke the silence.
Sokka didn't look up from polishing his boomerang when he replied, "Towards the colonies. There's a resistance base hidden somewhere in the mountains and, well, I figured we'd probably have better luck finding it with an earthbender among us." He looked up to flash the blind girl a grin she didn't see.
"Oh, I get it," Toph rolled her pale green eyes, "Bring the blind earthbender along, she has nothing better to do than find some group of rebels hiding in the mountains for us."
"Ignore Sokka," Suki interjected, climbing next to Aang atop Appa's head. "You're part of the group now and we want you here for more than your ability to locate a secret underground militia base. Right, Aang?"
The airbender didn't turn his gaze from the mist surrounding them when he mumbled in agreement.
Suki, ever the friendly peace-keeper, looked over her shoulder with a reassuring smile, "See?"
"Yeah, I'm totally convinced," The earthbender crossed her arms.
Katara maintained her silence, still not entirely sure of what to think about the blind girl, but not wishing to anger her given the sensitive information Toph knew about her relations with the Fire Nation prince.
They fell into another long stretch of quiet, listening to the breeze whistle and hiss around them as they floated through the air. After a period of stillness, Suki suddenly shifted atop Appa's head, a gasp escaping her lips.
"Sokka… Katara…" The Kyoshi Warrior turned to glance back at them, her tone oddly pensive. "Look."
Katara returned the water to her skin as her brother crawled towards the anterior of the saddle, following his girlfriend's gaze.
"No way," His voice was distant, unbelieving.
"What?" Katara followed.
Her breath caught in her throat. Below them, protruding from the thick gray mist that loomed above the ground, were a line of wooden sticks. Upon closer inspection, she recognized the objects not as sticks, but masts. The wood curled up into a spiral, swirling like an eddy in water, and dark blue sails clung to masts, tied down with rope.
"Could it really be…" She started.
"It's the Southern Fleet!" Her brother interrupted, a smile spreading across his lips. "It's dad!"
…
The sky was gray, spitting a light rain down upon them as their rhinos and the bounty hunter's shirshu trudged through puddles on the ground. The weather was fitting, matching Zuko's mood as memories of his dream the previous night whirled around in the clouded haze of confusion in his mind. Even his uncle's antics – cheerfully informing the bounty hunter of the many Earth Kingdom plants that could be brewed into a delicious tea – could not distract him from his thoughts. A strange feeling nagged at him; had he never questioned these memories before? As a child, he had accepted the many explanations given to him by the adults in his life, but as an adult himself, looking back on the past, he was quick to notice the holes in their stories.
After a moment of quiet, he turned to the old General. "Uncle, what happened to Fire Lord Azulon?"
Iroh's face was grave when he turned back to look at his nephew. "Don't you remember?"
"I remember he died… the royal physicians said it was of natural causes," He pondered aloud. "But I don't remember him being ill."
"I wasn't there when it happened," His uncle sighed, slowing down his rhino to keep pace with Zuko's. "I was still heading back to the Fire Nation after… after I lost Lu Ten outside the walls of Ba Sing Se." The old General's voice wavered and his expression appeared to age him, accentuating the wrinkles on his brow.
"I know, but… around the same time-… that was the last time I saw her..." Zuko mumbled between gritted teeth. "My mother."
"I'm not sure I understand what you're asking, Prince Zuko," His uncle frowned.
"No one ever told me what happened to her," He continued. "Everyone seemed to think that it was the same illness that took the Fire Lord… but I don't remember either of them being sick… and there was never a funeral for her…"
"I don't know how to say this," Iroh's frown deepened, his tone serious. "But the nation was grieving the loss of both the Fire Lord and his future successor… your mother's condition… well, it fell through the cracks in light of the uncertainty surrounding the line of royal succession."
"So she was sick?" Zuko questioned, looking up.
"I never saw her," Iroh exhaled. "But that is what the physicians said. No one was allowed to visit her for fear that it was contagious."
Zuko's brow furrowed. Something still wasn't sitting right with him. He thought back to his last memory of his mother, reading Iroh's letter to him and Azula. Was she sick then? It seemed far too coincidental that the Fire Lord died so suddenly and she followed shortly after, supposedly from the same illness.
You want to know where your retched mother is? His father's words echoed in his mind.
He had thought that perhaps his uncle might be able to clear up some of his confusion – that as the next in line for the throne, he would know more about what had happened during that time – but it appeared that the old General was privy to little more than he was.
"I'm sorry I don't have a better answer," Iroh reached out, grasping his nephew's shoulder in attempt to comfort him. "During that time, everything was… a blur. My son… he was taken from me far too early. A father should never have to attend his own child's wake and… I didn't deal with my grief well."
Zuko persisted, "And that's why you gave up your position as heir apparent?"
Iroh averted his gaze, squinting his eyes against the falling rain as he looked off into the distance. "What has suddenly brought this up? You haven't spoken of your mother in years."
The Fire Nation prince scowled, still upset that he had nearly forgotten her. "It was a dream-… or a memory… from grandfather's wake. Don't you think it's strange that she just… disappeared? That no one talked about what happened to her? It was like everyone forgot about her. They took down pictures of her, they cleared out her chambers… they never even held a funeral!"
He was starting to lose his temper again, frustrated at his uncle's apparent distance and the vagueness of his answers. Zuko knew that the loss of Prince Lu Ten had hit Iroh hard – that he had holed himself up in his chambers for weeks, only showing up to publicly appear at important national events, that it had been years before he was able to smile again – but he had expected answers and all he was getting was more questions. Why did his uncle seem so ill-informed?
"I'm sorry, Prince Zuko," Iroh squeezed his shoulder again. "I wasn't myself back then… If I'm being honest, I didn't question the circumstances of your mother's passing at the time. After losing Lu Ten, I slipped into a deep depression. I was unable to fulfill my role as heir apparent."
The old man could see that this answer did not satisfy his nephew, so he continued, "If it is any consolation, I know for a fact that your mother loved you the best she could. She was a strong woman and the people of the Fire Nation have not forgotten her, despite what you say."
Zuko's expression softened. Though his uncle was unable to clear the confusion, he realized that grilling the old man on details that eluded him wasn't getting him anywhere. He glanced up to see Iroh wipe a tear from his eye.
"I- I'm sorry, Uncle. I… didn't mean to upset you."
"It's quite alright, Prince Zuko," The old General replied, forcing a solemn smile. "It was a long time ago and it was a period in my life that I am not particularly proud of. I apologize that I can't tell you anything else. It's understandable that you would be frustrated."
They sat in silence a moment longer as Iroh collected himself.
"I have to ask," The old man said, changing the subject. "Your insistence upon June locating Miss Katara… What do you plan to do?"
"I'm going to find her." Zuko stated, carefully choosing his next words. "And I'm going to join forces with the Avatar."
A broad smile curled the General's lips, his pained expression suddenly a thing of the past.
"That is very good to hear," Iroh responded. "You have grown a lot during these past few months, Zuko. You are a different man than you once were and I'm proud of you."
I'm proud of you… The words hit Zuko with such force, it was as if the breath was knocked from his lungs. For years he had waited to hear those same sentiments from his father. He had searched the globe for the Avatar, despite the insistence that the airbender was long gone from this world along with the Avatar Spirit, in anticipation of his father's acceptance. Now, however, hearing it from his uncle, in conjunction with his decision to join the Avatar – if only temporarily – left a sour taste in his mouth.
"For many years, I have tried to make you see that your destiny is your own to choose," Iroh continued, "Foolishly, I hadn't expected for you to come to that conclusion in my absence."
Zuko averted his gaze from his Uncle's grin. "I haven't given up on my honor, Uncle- I can't."
Iroh nodded, undeterred, reaching over to wrap his arms around his nephew in a sideways embrace. "Prince Zuko, you never lost your honor."
I think what you did… was honorable… Katara's voice echoed in his head. Do you trust me? The muscles in his jaw tightened. How was it that she seemed to enter his every thought? Honor isn't something that someone else can take away…
Every word seemed to simultaneously comfort him and instill a deeper sense of uncertainty in his resolve. The last he had seen her, she had been dancing alone in the light of the full moon. Her visage now danced through his mind, beckoning him to follow her. Zuko… Please… Come with me…
There was no doubt in his mind with regards to this: he would find her. The rest, he would figure out later.
…
Appa landed on the sandy shore with a dull thud as voices sounded through the mist from the collection of blue tents that were barely visible through the gray haze. Katara exchanged an uneasy glance with her brother as weapons clinked and a number of warriors dressed in Water Tribe blues approached them.
"Sokka?" A familiar, disembodied voice came, prompting the warriors to lower their weapons. "And Katara?"
Sokka stepped forwards, pushing out his chest with a grin.
The voice belonged to none other than Bato, an old friend of their father's. Katara couldn't help the smile that graced her lips when she recognized him. It was nice to see a familiar face, a warm reminder of home after looking upon the faces of so many strangers.
"Hey, Bato," Sokka simpered.
"It is you!" The warrior confirmed, dropping his weapon and straightening with a grin to match her brother's. "Lower your weapons!" He commanded those around him, "These are Chief Hakoda's children."
Katara scanned the faces of the warriors, recognizing a few and noting how different they looked since the last time she had seen them almost three years ago.
"Look at you- a man grown!" Bato commented, stepping forward to embrace Sokka, clapping him hard on the back before turning to Katara and enveloping her in a bear hug. "And Katara, it's been so long! You're a spitting image of your mother."
"It's so good to see you," She smiled, returning the hug. "We never thought that we would run into our own people out here."
Bato laughed a deep chortle, pulling back. "Likewise!" He glanced behind them to where Appa and the rest of their friends awkwardly lurked. "What on earth are you doing here?"
"It's a long story," Sokka replied, with a shrug. "Katara found the Avatar in an iceberg, the Fire Nation prince came and took him, but we rescued him, and now we're heading north to help him find a waterbending master."
"The Avatar?"
"Yes!" Sokka excitedly confirmed, turning to introduce their friends. "This is Aang, the Avatar."
"Nice to meet you," Aang waved meekly.
"And this is Toph, an earthbender," He continued, "And this…" He walked over to wrap his arm around Suki, "Is Suki, my girlfriend… and a Kyoshi Warrior." He finished, with another toothy grin.
Bato appeared to be trying to follow along, nodding. "It's great to meet you all. You'll have to fill me in on all the details later. To think that I would run into Hakoda's kids out here in the Earth Kingdom!"
"Speaking of," Sokka interjected, scanning the crowd of warriors that had gathered behind Bato, "Where is he?"
The water tribe warrior's expression fell solemn as he looked over his shoulder. "I'm sorry… he's not here. He led half of the fleet to the Northern Water Tribe to meet with Chief Arnook. There has been talk of reuniting the tribes and, as the Chief of the Southern Tribe, your father ventured north to initiate an agreement."
"Uniting the tribes?" Sokka repeated.
"After decades of division," Bato nodded. "But we can talk about that later. Come, we'll set you and your friends up with some tents and some meat."
Sokka's eyes lit up at the mention of meat.
Katara caught the gaze of one of the warriors upon her and he smiled when their eyes met. He was a young man named Giraq, who she vaguely remembered teasing Sokka during their youth. His mother had been one of the women who had coached her about luring a man during the last summer solstice celebration. His eyes sweeping up and down over her form made her uncomfortable and she quickly looked away, thinking of Zuko.
Tents were set up for them, a fire was started, and Katara – perhaps out of habit – started preparing a meal for the water tribe fleet and her friends alike. Sokka regaled the water tribe warriors with tales of their travels; rescuing Aang, fleeing the Fire Nation prince at Kyoshi Island, the prison-break in Omashu. Katara and Suki often intervened to correct Sokka's exaggerations, but Katara did not venture to correct any of the details he left out about her capture and the time she spent with Zuko.
When Giraq turned to her to offer an, "That must have been terrible – to be held captive by the Fire Nation prince himself," she pretended not to hear him.
As Sokka's story continued on to more recent events – what happened at General Fong's base – Aang got up and left. Bato glanced between them, a question in his expression.
"He's fine," Sokka added dismissively returning to his rendition of the Avatar State. Katara, however, saw the opportunity to speak with the airbender and quickly got up, leaving the pot of stew simmering over the cookfire.
"Aang!" She called out, following him into the mist. He acted as though he hadn't heard her, continuing towards the waterfront. "Wait up!"
The airbender was sitting in the sand, watching the waves lap at the shore when she finally caught up to him.
"Hey," She approached him, reaching out for his shoulder. He turned to brush her hand away. "Are you okay?"
Aang returned his eyes to the waves, his brows knitting.
"Please, Aang, just talk to me. What's wrong?"
"Everything," He replied tersely, "Everything is wrong."
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know, Katara… nothing feels right. I don't feel like myself anymore."
She removed her boots and sat down next to him, digging her toes into the sand. "Is this about… the Avatar State? Speaking with Roku?"
"Yes and no," He responded, still not meeting her gaze.
"I know it's hard, Aang… I understand why you want to speak with Roku… but you have to realize, it's just too risky-"
"I know," He interrupted her, "I don't want to put you or anyone else in danger again."
"Then, what is it? What's bothering you?"
"I just-… I feel alone," He exhaled. "You and Sokka have all these people that care about you. You have a tribe… and a family. I don't have anyone."
"But you do!" She insisted, "You have us, Aang. We're your friends… we're your family."
"It's not the same."
"I know, but-"
"And I need to speak to Roku. I need to find out what it is that he's trying to tell me. If it's too risky-… I'll just have to go alone."
"Aang, no! You can't go alone. We won't let you put yourself in danger like that."
"Then what am I supposed to do?" He turned to her abruptly, raising his voice.
Katara sighed; she didn't have a good answer.
"I don't know yet… we still have some time to figure it out. The solstice is still two days away. How about tomorrow we talk with Bato about it – maybe he will have an idea. Maybe the Southern Water fleet can help?"
Aang looked back to the tide, deep in thought.
"Please, just… don't do anything rash," She begged," We'll figure something out. I promise."
The airbender glanced back at her and nodded before averting his gaze once more.
"C'mon, let's go back. Dinner is almost ready."
"You go," He replied, crossing his legs and assuming a meditative posture. "I'll head back in a bit. I just want some time alone."
Katara frowned, but obliged. "Ok, just… let me know if you want to talk some more. I'm here for you, Aang, don't forget that."
Hesitantly, she turned back towards the gathering around the campfire.
…
Zuko paced back and forth, the muscles in his forearms rippling every time he clenched his fists. Candles burned bright in the corner, the flames lapping at the iron walls of his chambers, reflecting the unease coursing through him.
He was so close. After all this time apart, he would finally see her again. Had she received his note? Was she anticipating his return? Or had she given up on him like so many others in his life? What would he even say when he finally saw her?
"Katara, I-…" He started, "I've realized that you were right- that I don't have to capture the Avatar to regain my honor-" No, that was a lie. "Katara," He tried again, "I thought about what about you said… and I've decided to join you and your friends. I know that I… haven't given you much reason to trust me- and why would you? I chased you through the Earth Kingdom trying to capture the Avatar, I used you as bait for a trap… but I promise that I've changed… you changed me." No.
With a grunt he ignited a flame in his fists, slashing at the air. That wouldn't do either. What could he possibly say to the person who had entered his every thought since their parting – the girl who had comforted him despite herself, who had seen his weakness and not exploited it, who had kissed him with a passion he had never known? How could he tell her that she meant more to him than she would ever know?
"Katara, I don't know if you got my message, but… I meant what I said, I won't let you go-"
He was interrupted by a metallic rapping on the door.
"What?" He snapped, the candle flames in the corner leaping with his frustration.
"Prince Zuko, it's me," His uncle's voice came from the other side of the heavy iron door. "I brought tea."
"I don't want tea right now!" He seethed, his temper once again getting the better of him.
"Very well," The old General replied at length. "June is inquiring about her payment-"
"Then pay her!" Zuko yelled, incredulous. Had his uncle really come to bother him over this?
After another long silence, he heard footsteps echoing in the hallway outside his door, fading into quiet once again. Zuko collapsed onto his bed, clenching his jaw. He couldn't let Katara or her friends see him like this. How was he going to convince them to trust him?
…
The rest of the night had been uneventful; Aang had returned for dinner, in a seemingly better mood, and listened intently as Bato spoke of the task that Hakoda had given the remainder of the fleet in his absence – disabling Fire Nation Navy cruisers heading towards the colonies. Toph had been the first to retire to her tent, stating that she was tired of not being able to see anything standing on sand. Katara soon followed, allowing the distant voices of the water tribe warriors left around the campfire to lull her to sleep.
Katara stirred after a long, dreamless slumber. She sat up in her bedroll and stretched, surprised she had slept for so long. The sun was up, obscured by clouds, and the mist from the previous day had cleared some. As she crawled outh from her tent, Suki approached her.
"Morning, sunshine," The Kyoshi grinned, "Sleep well?"
"I did," Katara returned the smile, "Honestly, the best I've slept in a while. Where is everyone?"
"Sokka got up super early and went with Bato and some of the Southern Warriors to do some kind of sailing exercise. Toph is kicking sand around near the water."
"And Aang?"
"I haven't seen him yet," She shrugged. "I think he's still sleeping. You talked to him last night, right? Do you think he's feeling better?"
"It seemed like it," Katara replied, brushing sand from her tunic. "I'm going to go check on him and wake him up."
"Sounds good," The Kyoshi nodded.
Katara walked over to Aang's tent, intent on making sure he was ok. When Sokka and Bato returned, they would talk about Roku and the solstice. Perhaps the Southern Fleet could help them get into Fire Nation territory. It was still risky, but if Aang was bent on going, there was little she could do to stop him. At least with the Water Tribe Warriors at their back, they would have more people on their side, if worst came to worst.
"Aang," Katara called as she opened the tent flap, "Are you awake?"
She peered into the tent and froze; it was empty. Aang's bedroll lay on the ground, undisturbed.
No, she thought, trying to calm herself, he must be here somewhere. She released the tent flap and ran over to the pile of embers that they had sat around the night before. He had agreed not to do anything rash. Her heart sank when she saw only Suki there, picking at a pile of driftwood next to the firepit.
"What's going on?" The Kyoshi asked, worry in her tone. "Where's Aang?"
"I- I don't know," Katara replied frantically. "He's not in his tent!"
"Just calm down and breathe," Suki picked up some driftwood and dropped it in the pit, arranging it to get another fire started, "He couldn't have gone far."
"Have you seen Appa this morning?"
At that, Suki straightened. "No…" She turned to where the bison had been sleeping the night before and Katara followed her gaze. As they approached the large indentation that Appa's body had left in the sand, Katara's heart dropped into her stomach; there were two pairs of footprints – one clearly belonging to the flying bison – that led away from the encampment, towards the shore.
"What's all the fuss about?" Toph approached, wiggling her sandy toes. "Ugh, I hate sand."
"It's Aang," Katara cried, getting more anxious by the second. "Have you seen him?"
"I can't see, Princess – I thought we already went over this. Why?"
"We can't find him," Suki answered. "He's not in his tent and Appa is missing."
"Maybe they went for a walk?" Toph suggested.
"I'm just worried he…" Katara started, "But he wouldn't- he said he wouldn't do anything rash."
"What do you mean?" Suki asked.
"Last night… he said that if no one would go with him to find that crescent-shaped island, he would go by himself."
"You think he actually… left?" Toph asked. The silence was her answer.
Suki frowned. "We have to find Sokka."
They ran to the shore only to find a number of the water tribe boats missing from where they had been docked the previous evening. Mist still hung above the sea, obscuring their view of the bay. Katara stared at the empty water, feeling a sense of dread settling in her stomach. She felt stupid. Aang had never promised her that he wouldn't leave to find that island on his own, he had only nodded when she asked him not to do anything rash. Now, she realized, he had been trying to pacify her – that he had never intended to miss the opportunity to speak to Roku – and he must have been planning on leaving the first chance he got.
Cursing her naivety, Katara kicked the sand. How could she let this happen? What could they even do about it now with Appa gone? Surely, this situation couldn't get any worse.
As if the universe could hear her thoughts, a low-frequency note echoed through the thinning mist, prickling her skin with goosebumps. Katara had heard this sound before, a noise she would never forget. The source was a large war-horn carved from the bone of a buffalo yak. The horn was only ever used for one thing in the Southern Water Tribe: to warn of approaching Fire Nation ships.
I'm so relieved I finally posted this! It was half-done for a long time...
What did you think about this chapter? Zuko's dreams/memories? Aang leaving for the crescent island alone?
I do have a question for anyone still reading: with regards to pairings, who would you like to see Sokka with? Suki, Yue, Toph? Fear not, Zutara still stands!
Thank you so so much for reading! Now, would you be so kind to review? (Yes, I am shamelessly begging for reviews - sue me.)
...
With love,
A Storm