*Author's Note*

Hello everyone! I truly apologise for the long wait for this update. The rest of the author's note will be at the end of the chapter.

Happy Reading!

-Smiles: )

The sky was dark by the time Juvia got home. It was only six in the evening but the sky was covered in gloomy dark clouds, a sign of impending rain. Her eyes lingered on the road where he had sped off on; she could still hear the engine of his vehicle revving even though he was no longer in sight. The two had parted with only Juvia's word of thanks being the only verbal exchange between them. There was no turning back.

Each step towards the house felt heavy. She averted her eyes from the house next to hers, knowing very well that if she were to see Ur, she might just have a breakdown right there on the spot.

Had it been her fault that everything ended up this way?

Yes. Who else would it have been? The subconscious part of her mind told her.

If only she had not caught feelings for him like this. If only she was able to see him as a friend and nothing else. Had she been just like the other girls in Fairy Tail and only saw him as a fellow comrade, a friend, perhaps it would have saved them all this pain she had brought to everyone around.

Dragging a hand over her arm, she realised that she had forgotten to return the shirt to him before he left, and being Gray, it would seem losing another article of clothing is normal. It was very likely that he had not noticed that she still had it with her. Chewing on her lower lip, she pulled out her phone and typed out a quick text that he had forgotten his shirt. Then, just as she was about to press send, she deleted the entire thing.

If he were to come back right away, it would be more awkward.

I'll just hold onto it and return it to him another time.

At the same time, the front door swung open abruptly. Before Juvia could react by moving back, out walked Gajeel who had almost knocked her over with how in a hurry he was.

"Shit!" The man cursed as his sister barely avoided him, standing to the side and staring at him with wide eyes.

For a moment, both siblings exchanged stares with each other, one looking more worried than the other. His eyebrows were almost touching from how hard he was frowning.

Juvia frowned at her brother's appearance. His long hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, seemingly to have been from his fingers running through them way too many times. Her eyes then trailed down to his feet.

"Were you going to go out in those?"

He had been wearing the bunny slippers she had got him as a present for Christmas the previous year. It was a prank she pulled on him though he ended up using it after giving the excuse that it would be a waste to not use it. Only those in the Redfox house knew that he wore such things at home. If Levy was here, Juvia was sure the girl would've laughed her butt off because no one but Juvia had seen this side of Gajeel before.

At the thought of Levy, Juvia became worried. Had something happened while she was out? Was that why her brother was in such a hurry?

She parted her lips to ask but before she could do so, Gajeel grunted in annoyance, grabbing her by the arm and led her inside the house without giving her a chance to protest or question what was happening. He shut the door closed behind them and Juvia saw Metalicana emerging from the kitchen, his brows pulled into a frown before they relaxed upon seeing his daughter. Looking between her father and her brother, she slowly realised what had happened.

"I was just about to go out and look for you." Gajeel tells her, cocking a brow. He was most definitely not impressed with how she forgot to update him on her whereabouts.

He had dropped her off at the cafe she was supposed to be at and when he had asked what time he should come and get her; she had told him that she would call to let him know and she had forgotten.

The moment she saw and began talking to Gray, everything else became a blur.

Stupid. Juvia chided herself in her head. The gnawing guilt that had been sitting on her chest ever since the whole thing started, grew even more. She had made her family unnecessarily worried once again.

"Your brother was about to call the emergency units, had you not returned any earlier," Metalicana said in a light teasing tone but Juvia could see the weary lines on his face.

"Sorry Dad, we," she swallowed a lump in her throat that threatened to stop her from speaking, "We were talking and got caught up in it. We went to the beach after the cafe because it was quieter that way and we talked and- I'm sorry." She rushed out, barely catching her breath.

"Hey, hey, it's alright," Metalicana came towards her and ushered her to the couch. Behind, he gestured for Gajeel to grab a glass of water for her. "It's alright. Take in a deep breath."

He rubbed a hand on her back soothingly, watching her take in breaths of air. Gajeel returned with a glass of water, handing it to his sister with worry clear in his eyes, the frustration he felt earlier had dissipated completely.

Taking sips of the water, she eventually calmed down.

"He sent me home and yup… we're done." She told them, looking down at her hands as she picked at her nails as a distraction.

Both men glanced at each other, the younger one unsure of what to do, after all, he had been the one encouraging her to talk to Gray.

"Why don't you go wash up before dinner, sweetheart?"

She shook her head, "It's alright, Dad. I'm not hungry."

"Gajeel made dinner for today, are you sure?" Metalicana informed, "I supervised him so be assured that it is safe to consume." He added with a wink when she turned to face him with surprise.

Unable to hold back a smile, Juvia glanced at her brother whose arms were crossed, appearing proud at his creation for the evening. If Metalicana offered his cooking to her, she was sure that the food that her brother made that day was edible enough to be considered a pass.

"Save some for me, I'll have it when I'm hungry later." She tells him, getting up from the couch to wash up.

"Juvia-,"

"I just need a little time to myself. I'll be fine, I promise," she smiled, pushing back hair that had fallen on the side of her face. I'll be fine.

—

Curled up at the corner of her bed with her knees hugged closed to her, Juvia watched the rain racing down her window. The sudden downpour made the temperature in her room colder so she threw on an extra layer over her shirt to stay warm.

She was sure that after it was over, their front yard would be soaking wet while their backyard would turn muddy because of the soil work Metalicana had been working on. Then a memory of her past came to mind, a time when they were kids, her brother, Lyon and Gray would be excited to play in the yard after the rain. She recalled being appalled by the way they landed themselves in the mud so easily but was soon coaxed into it when Gray encouraged her to join them.

Though, if Ultear had not been the one to alert Ur who was babysitting the two Redfox children at the time, she was sure that they would have been encased in dried mud at the end of it.

If only we could go back to those simpler times.

Reminiscing the past, Juvia wrapped her arms around her shoulders in self-comfort. She had never expected things to turn out this way. Her naive mind had thought that perhaps one day, her love for her best friend would simply fade off into purely something platonic and remain that way for life. They would each have their own families and she would be able to grow old, telling her grandchildren stories of when they were younger.

Bringing her arm over her eyes, the scent of Gray's cologne infiltrated her nose immediately. She had worn his shirt as an extra layer. When she found herself relaxing into the scent, Juvia realised that her thoughts for something platonic would have never happened.

The most important part in her equation for a platonic friendship was missing. If there was a day that he would tell her that he had found his other half, she would most likely break and crumble like a sandcastle made without water.

Be it the current situation or in another parallel universe where Hanahaki is purely a myth that no one believes in, she was sure it would just be another case of unrequited love even if this whole disease was purely a myth people talked about in fiction books.

Wrapping her arms tighter, the smell of Gray and his cologne embraced her like a cocoon and she hated that her body was relaxing into it.

It was not her first time having one of his clothes, with his habit of stripping, there were a few she kept for her own with the excuse that men's clothes felt more comfortable. Being Gray, he could not win her argument when she told him some of his clothes could not fit him anymore because of the muscles he had put on as they got older. Even now, her favourite grey shirt was one of his from back when they just entered high school.

So why was she acting like it was the first time she had one of his clothing on her?

The irrational side of her betrayed her thoughts, because the way he draped it over you was like the way they do in the movies.

Like a traitor to her thoughts, her heart pumped faster and her cheeks grew warm and pink.

Stop it.

The way his shirt fit her, it felt like she was cocooned between his arms and for that reason, she could not help but remember her hands wrapped around him on their way back. The warmth he emitted. The security he provided.

Stop it, Juvia.

A broken record, that was what her head was like, a broken record as it replayed his words again and again.

"I can't lose you. I'm serious."

Stop.

"I can't lose you."

Stop.

"Juvia."

Stop.

"I can't lose you because I love you."

Stop thinking about it. She rubbed her hands over her face in frustration, wetness evident on her cheeks. Stop.

—

Over the days leading up to the big day, Juvia had tried to spend as much time as she could with her family. The girls had gone over for a visit sometime in between those days with Gajeel being the one to arrange the entire thing with the help of a certain blue-haired shorty.

Lucy burst into tears the moment she saw her while Cana hugged her so tightly that Levy had to pry her away in order not to suffocate Juvia.

The only person who was standing the furthest from Juvia was the platinum blonde girl.

Though stubborn at the beginning, she eventually gave in to the apologetic words the bluenette was giving her. They made up with a long hug and freshly baked cookies from Juvia. Their friendship was reassured to be intact but Juvia knew it would not be the exact same with everything that has happened. She could only hope their friendship could be repaired little by little with what she had broken by hiding such things from her.

Throughout the whole duration they were there, Juvia had stayed in the living room where everyone was after being spending much of her days in her room. They talked and caught up on events that happened at school. They even told her how Claire was found getting it on with one of the professors in the janitor's closet and both were currently suspended from going back to Magnolia University.

While she listened to the new gossip Lucy heard, Juvia had tried many times to get up and retrieve refreshments for her friends but all of them insisted that she stayed where she was. She obliged and watched with interested eyes as her brother and Levy constantly went back to the kitchen with the excuse of getting more snacks even though they barely touched the ones they brought out moments ago.

When the sun began to set, Metalicana invited them to stay for dinner. Cana declined his offer with Lucy and Lisanna who thanked them for their hospitality. Apart from Levy who stayed back to help clean, the three girls left, pooling together in Cana's car.

Out of Juvia's sight, they were able to let their emotions out. Within the time they had not seen Juvia, the girl almost looked like a different person. Her cheeks were slightly sunken in and so were the dark circles under her eyes. They saw that she barely ate anything during their lunch and when they looked to Gajeel for answers, he only shook his head and placed a finger to his lips.

Returning home, they wished that their dear friend would have a speedy recovery after everything.

As for the situation with Gray, Juvia had not spoken to him after the last time they met. She supposed it was for the better. If they pretended to be strangers, it would probably hurt them less when she forgets him entirely.

His shirt remained in her room, washed and folded, sitting right above her dresser. It looked out of place where it was sitting right next to her accessories. She would have returned it to him if she could but Metalicana had put her on house arrest which she was not against. Judging by how much physically weaker she felt in recent days, Juvia agreed it was for the better. She had been getting less sleep at night despite feeling tired. She was constantly woken up by her body to get rid of the flowers choking up her system. The lack of appetite was another culprit for her fatigued body.

She tried to remain active by moving around the house, but that did not turn out well with Gajeel watching her like a hawk each time she took a step out of the room.

With just a day more to her surgery date, she took the time to put down entries onto an online diary which only she could read. There were pages and pages of stories she wanted to keep for her own. Most of them lacked the details for they were just memories from her head being put down onto a screen, but it was better than nothing.

Short-amnesiac effects were common for a few days according to the doctor while long-term memory loss was rare, they can still happen. It was the reason why she wrote down the details of her life. She found pictures of Fairy Tail and plastered them in the electronic diary, labelling each and every one of her friends. Her family and next door neighbour were included as well, she wrote down their favourite foods and her favourite memories with them. Juvia made sure to state down the details like how Natsu and Lucy were a thing, Lisanna and her love-interest with a tattooed tongue, Cana and her constant back-and-forth relationship with a man named Bacchus.

With Ur and Ultear, it would be the shopping trip they had gone on for her prom dress. It was a girls' day out; one she had wished that Eliana had been with them. Despite all that, the girls' bonding time they had was something she treasured from her high school days.

With Lyon, it would be the one where he had made her laugh so hard during a game session at his house. It was a simple charades game with the other kids but the way his facial features crumpled together to tell her a word non-verbally had her in stitches by the end of it. At one point of the game, Lyon even made Ultear snort out milk from her nose because of how funny he was.

With Gajeel and Metalicana, there were too many memories she did not want to forget. She jotted them down as much as possible, describing as detailed as possible about Eliana. After that, she was just left with Gray's.

Putting her hands down to the keyboard, Juvia began writing.

—

"Are you sure about this, old man?" Gajeel asked, looking behind him to make sure that Juvia was nowhere in sight or in earshot of what his father had just told him.

The older Redfox nodded solemnly, "We're opening another workshop in Crocus, it would be just right for us to go over when the doctor gives us the greenlight after the surgery."

"What about Juvia? Are you not going to tell her?"

"Moving away would be the best thing for her. Besides, it's not like we're not coming back here ever again. Your Mother loved this house, we can come back to it every summer or whenever you and I have to for business reasons." Metalicana adjusted the glasses on the bridge of his nose, staring down at the numerous paperwork on the kitchen table. Gajeel stared at his father in awe. The whole time he had been understanding and patient with Juvia, he had already been planning their move. The workshop expansion in another city was expected but the expansion was not going to happen for another year.

Yet, Gajeel understood the reason. Crocus was a few hours' drive from their current home, it was far enough so that Juvia would not have to see Gray again but near enough if the people from Fairy Tail wanted to keep in touch. They lived right next to Ur so Metalicana had planned for their family to move elsewhere, a place where she could recover and heal from the surgery without the worry of seeing Gray ever again.

Even if he never said it, Gajeel was sure that their father felt some sort of an anger towards the Fullbuster next door. It was probably a mix of the fact that Juvia liked him and the fact that such a thing happened because of it that led him to make such a decision.

Crocus would be a new start for her. Gajeel knew that. For him, it was easy if he wanted to stay because they still had a workshop there to manage. Levy would be going to Crocus for an internship in another six months for a year so it would not be a problem for him. For Juvia, it would mean a fresh start, a new page with missing memories of a certain person; if they were unlucky, it would be of several persons.

"When will you tell her?"

"After the surgery."

—

You have a text message from Gray.

The light from Juvia's phone illuminated her face in the dark room and her squinted eyes attempted to adjust to the lighting contrast. In the silence of her room, she could only hear her heart pounding against her chest as she tried to catch her breath. The heavy pour outside did little to calm her down.

She shifted her gaze to her blue rug that appeared gray in the dark. A trash bin was seated right next to where she was.

You have a text message from Gray. (2)

Unable to look at what he had to say, Juvia flipped her phone over on the bed behind her. A flash of lightning gave her a glimpse of the floral petals gathered in the bin. The crackling thunder only seemed to worsen what she was feeling. It felt difficult to breathe and the sight of the florals were just a reminder of the ticking bomb inside of her. Not that she had ever forgotten about it.

The past few nights have been sleepless. She would shoot out of bed in the middle of the night, hurrying down to the bathroom where she would not wake her family. She would then spend half an hour, hunched over the toilet in pain and discomfort. Every night would be worse than the one before and Juvia could only point the reason toward the medication she was on. It had been helpful in reducing the number of episodes in the day, however, her condition appeared worse at night after a few days of it.

Thinking about just how this whole thing had toyed with her, Juvia mock herself internally. If she had just opted for the surgical removal right there and then, perhaps she would be recovering right now, no one else would have to witness her in pain or be in pain because of her.

Chewing on the inside of her cheek, Juvia could still taste blood lingering at the back of her tongue. The episode was not over yet.

Dr. Erika had warned her about the medication's temporary effect and would not work for more than two weeks straight. It was a medication that was still considered new in the industry and from what she heard from Meredy; it was the same medication that her friend had used. The effects varied per individual and maybe it was reaching its threshold in her body.

Another cough wrecked her system and Juvia slapped a hand over her mouth to muffle the sound. It was a habit she had developed quickly upon her return home.

The first time her brother witnessed her have an episode was the day she returned from the hospital. He almost raced her to the car right away to hospital had it not been Metalicana who stopped him. Juvia did not see their expressions. She could not bear to see them that way for what was happening to her. She did her best to assure her brother that everything was fine which led to the outburst the other day.

One after another, she tried to keep the noise down despite the fact that the heavy rain would most likely muffle her coughs. She ignored the metallic taste that coated her tongue and kept her hand over her mouth, waiting for the feeling of floral petals against her skin. Instead of the rough floral ends or smooth petals she would recognise just by the way it felt against her palm, there was something sticky and wet on her hand.

Her lungs would not cease its repulsion towards the growth inside of her. Juvia wanted it to stop so badly, her chest felt sore from the coughing, she considered holding back the coughs but she knew it would be worse to hold them back.

The sentiment was quickly proved right when a sharp pain shot through her ribs and she threw herself over the trash bin, barely holding herself up with one hand fisting the rug beneath her.

Out of the blue, the lights in her room turned on abruptly and Juvia shut her eyes at the sudden burst of light. The thunder boomed loudly at the same time she reopened her eyes.

Juvia fought the urge to scream at the scene before her. It was like a scene from a horror movie.

Surrounding her were petals in shades of blue, no, they were in varying colours but she could not really differentiate them when there was blood coated over every single one of them. The trash bin that had taken the brunt of the entire situation had crimson red liquid in splatters over it. She did not have to look inside to see more of the cruel truth tearing her up on the inside. The floor was not spared, bearing drops of blood on the polished wood.

If she could, Juvia wanted to hide them from the people who walked into her room.

Pulling her hand away from her face, she began to shake. Her hand was covered in blood.

She could hear footsteps approaching next to her and she dropped her head, unable to look at whoever that it was in front of her.

Gray said he loved her so why was it coming back in full force like this? His words, his presence, thoughts of him always seemed to worsen it.

That's enough Juvia, it's over.

Gajeel first came into view but she refused to lift her head. There was a silent gasp from the man when he saw the state she was in. She was covered in her own spit and blood; the flowers were less of a concern now that he saw crimson red in droplets all over her. Her blue locks even bore some of it.

"We have to go to the hospital." Were the only words he could utter to his father who hurried downstairs to start the car in the rain. Gajeel picked up his sister effortlessly, telling her that everything would be fine in a voice so gentle that Juvia would have mistaken it might have been her father instead. Unable to say a word, she hid her face in the crook of his neck.

It's over.

The girl could barely remember the ride to the hospital, everything else went in a blur around her. Being rushed into the emergency department, another doctor was on duty and immediately began sending her for tests, plunging needles into her skin, giving her medication that would ease the pain in her torso.

It could have been the fact that she had been coughing her guts out just a while ago or it was the medication that they had injected into her that she slipped in and out of consciousness throughout the entire rush.

The nurses helped her change into a patient's gown because of the mess she had made and Juvia saw the red stains on her favourite pajamas that they placed aside. The old sweatshirt was no longer that colour of grey. She would not be able to return that to its owner ever again.

As soon as the nurses were done, the curtains surrounding her were opened wide enough for her family to enter. The doctor asked if they wanted to proceed with the surgery as soon as the tests came out. Juvia barely registered what they said other than the fact that it would be best for her to have the surgery as soon as possible. They gave them time and privacy to discuss, excusing themselves to call down on the doctor responsible for Juvia's case.

"Sweetheart," Metalicana's voice cut through her mind swirling with a whirl of words.

He seemed exhausted. His hair was in a mess unlike the normal neat look, a sign that he had gotten out of bed at the wrong timing. It was pre-dawn and they were up and early at the hospital, earlier than her scheduled date. Seeing Juvia in her current condition reminded him too much of Eliana. There were no blood relations yet they had to fall for a man that could not return their feelings.

Now they were in a situation where time was of essence.

"Why don't we get it done and over with, Juvia?" Metalicana says. He observed her face that was in a daze. There were dark circles under her eyes and he would be lying if he said he never noticed them in the past few days. Even when she tried to hide them with makeup, he could tell she was not getting much sleep in the night.

The two-week countdown to her original surgery appointment was meant for her to tie up loose ends, be mentally prepared and if she wanted to, to talk to Gray, after all, nothing can be undone after the surgery. Imagine waking up one day, talking to your longtime childhood friend only to have them treat you like a stranger.

Metalicana did not know what it felt like but he knew what it felt like to be waiting on the other side of the operation room. Right now, his priority was to get her treated as soon as possible. Disregarding the fact that the side effects of procedure may extend past its intended purpose of removing the feelings towards a person—meaning she might forget even her own father after—Metalicana wanted her safety first.

He was less worried about the side effects. Back then, he had thanked the gods when Eliana came out of surgery and still recognised him, and so he was more confident about his daughter coming out of it the same.

Juvia's eyes dropped to her legs where a blanket was draped over them.

"You're tired, aren't you?" He asked and she nodded. It was the truth.

Hiding a medical condition while living on the tips of her toes, afraid someone else might find out then going through some drama in between before having a huge incident and everyone finds out, it had been a rollercoaster ride for her within such a short period of time.

"The surgery will help. It'll get rid of all the pain. You won't have to deal with it again, you'll be able to go back to swimming after this, you miss swimming, don't you?" Metalicana continued on.

She nodded but with hesitation.

"Even if the boy does not love you, you have us. Forget him, you have good ol' dad here and your grumpy ol' brother." It was his bad attempt at humor to convince her.

However, her answer to him was nothing of humor as she shook her head and Metalicana felt his heart drop.

"Juvia-," Gajeel started, quickly wanting to convince her. His father had been so close to getting her to agree to it but she cut him off before he could do so.

"He said he loves me." Her voice was hoarse.

His eyes widened at the revelation. If he remembered correctly, the Fullbuster boy had known about Juvia's condition for sure. He would've known because there was no way he would not when Ur knew, when Juvia's friends knew.

"But," her voice lowered to whisper, "I'm tired."

Her eyes trailed to the green curtains acting as a partition, disliking how they reminded her of their frequent trips to the hospital in the past.

Her mind played back to her childhood. When she first met Gray, when they first became friends, when they first lost their tooth, when both of them got their first grade A in a test, when the both of them first picked up sports in elementary school, when the both of them first talked about their future as best friends, when they first went to high school and all the silly things they've done. The one time they ran for the bus, or many times because it was not just once they were almost late. The many moments that made her like him even more than a best friend.

Then it replayed to more recent events, the drama with them and his ex, with her going back and forth between telling him her feelings and not doing so.

She felt exhausted.

"Why is love so tiring?" Juvia asked without meaning to.

Perhaps it was the fact she was asking that after being awakened by pain in her chest and exerting all her energy on that. Perhaps it was the fact that she had been asked to take some pills which would relieve her of some pain. Perhaps…

"I'm tired."

—

It'll be fine. She thought. Forgetting Gray would be the best course of action for her right now. If she forgets him, he would distance himself and everything else will fall into place. They would be strangers who once knew each other. Yes, it'll be fine. She assured herself, clutching onto her fingers that were trembling on her lap as she was ushered off for the surgery.

Closing her eyes, Juvia could barely think of anything. Then, she remembered her phone and the text notifications from Gray.

Sorry. She wanted to be able to tell him that at least. Sorry for putting you in this situation. Sorry for hiding this from you. Sorry for everything. She wanted to tell him that before-

Dr. Erika showed up in her scrubs, giving her an assuring smile. "Let's pull through this together, Juvia." She then nodded at the medical staff responsible for the anesthesia.

"I just need you to count back from 10, 9, 8, 7…"

And then the world went black.

*Author's Note*

Yes. Indeed, we have got to the chapter that determined the ending of this draggy book. To be honest, several times in the past month I had considered removing this book entirely or simply stopping at the last chapter. I am aware my storyline is slightly messed up… or very messed up. I do not have a good sense of timing and using fillers at the correct time and place is still challenging for me. There were times I was upset because I think the way I portrayed Juvia was… in general not to expectations. Her decisions at times were illogical at times but that was the way I thought it might go if there were ever such a thing that happened. The way I wrote Gray was a little weird too with how last chapter went, I will admit that last chapter and perhaps even this chapter, I just wanted to end this book as quicky as possible.

To me, this is just an AU I started out with and even if the characters involved are OOC, I felt somewhat of a joy when I wrote out this story. I'm also glad I managed to push out this chapter. This is NOT the last chapter, there will be one more so once again, I implore you to stay for the next chapter if you're willingly to continue reading my work.

As always, if you're even reading this, thank you so much for your support and for staying to read my work. I am an amateur writer though I don't think I am good enough to call myself that but I am trying.

Stay healthy and stay safe!

Love,

Smiles: )