Chapter 14 – Mistletoe Challenge Finale

'Drink?'

Loki tries not to let the surprise show on his face as Clint, of all people, hands him a glass. 'Should I be concerned?' he teases.

To his event greater surprise, Clint looks a little ashamed as he shakes his head. 'Avengers' honour it's safe.'

'Just your word would have sufficed,' he reassures him. They are standing near the doors to the balcony, Loki having been taking a small break from the pandemonium caused by so many enthusiastic people in one room. Honestly his brother can be worse than the children at times.

'Can we…can we head outside for a minute?' Clint gestures to the balcony and Loki nods, following the archer.

'As much as I enjoy these celebrations,' Loki admits once the door is closed behind them, 'it's nice to have a measure of peace.'

Clint chuckles. 'Yeah I hear you. Sometimes it's nice to just sit and enjoy the quiet at home when the kids have gone to bed. Listen, Loki, about what Nathaniel said at lunch-'

'Peace, Barton, I do not expect an apology.'

'I know, but the thing is,' Clint pauses, running his glass between his hands as he leans on the balcony rail, then he sighs, hanging his head, 'the thing is I realised that, well, perhaps I wasn't being the most rational holding on to this hatred when you'd proven that you're not the same person you were when you attacked New York.'

'Neither am I not that person, though, and you of all people should recognise that.'

Clint nods. 'Yeah I know, I got a look at you when you pulled the whole mind control thing just like you did with me. Taken me a long time to work out just what it is I learned though, and I very much doubt I even brushed the surface.' They're silent for a few minutes, though it's not as tense as their interactions have been in the past. 'Thing is, I realised I wasn't exactly setting the best example to my kids, by not trying to move on. How can I expect them to forgive each other and us when we make mistakes if I can't do the same for someone else?'

'Hardly a sound comparison, considering what it is you went through.'

'Yeah but they don't know that, Loki. I couldn't tell them everything because I didn't want to scare them. But then how can I tell them to do one thing and then not do it myself?'

'When they are older you can explain to them what happened, and why there are some things that are harder to forgive than others. I can say one thing, Barton: you managed to keep your family a secret from me even when I had control of your mind. That in itself shows the lengths you will go to ensure their safety and happiness. I do not doubt you will always be able to find a way to resolve any issues they face.'

Clint looks at him, face open for the first time in their entire acquaintance. 'Thanks, Loki.'

-Do I need to make sure he's being polite?- Bucky's voice comes through their link.

-Actually we're doing fine, thank you for the vote of confidence-

'Hey you alright? You looked like you spaced out for a second.'

'Apologies. One of my babysitters decided to check we were behaving ourselves,' he taps his forehead.

Clint snorts. 'You mean Bucky was making sure I wasn't threatening you.' The archer looks back inside, then sighs and turns back to him. 'She's not going to get back with him you know.'

'I beg your pardon?' even he's struggling to keep up with this abrupt change in conversation.

'Nat. I know you said to Bucky about trying with her again after you helped him realise his dreams weren't actually dreams but memories.'

'I don't think I want to know how you discovered that piece of information.'

Clint grins at him. 'As Tony would say: "sneaky spy shit".' Then he sobers again. 'She won't go back to something with him, though, I know that for certain. She…' he seems to struggle to find the right words, 'she threatened his conditioning, and when they were separated they started to realise she wasn't quite the true Black Widow they'd trained her to be.'

'They doubted her loyalty.'

'Exactly,' Clint nods, 'so she had to prove to them she was and…well she went a little overboard sometimes.'

'Drakov's daughter? The hospital fire?' Loki feels a sinking feeling in his stomach, something like guilt.

'And more besides. You were right when you told her in the Raft that her ledger is gushing blood, and she did it to try and prove to them that she was loyal.'

'But she doesn't blame Bucky for that. I know her well enough to know she wouldn't blame someone else for her actions without very good reason.'

'No she doesn't, she blames herself which is worse. The thing is, because they separated them and then she defected, when she next saw him they were on opposite sides.'

'He didn't recognise her.'

'No. And he shot his target right through her. Hence the scar on her hip. When she realised he didn't recognise her and he'd do that to her now…well she closed herself off, decided not to let anyone else get close.'

'Until Bruce.'

'Someone who avoids the fight as much as possible,' Clint agrees with a sigh. 'And look how well that turned out.'

'She's too practical to be with someone too sentimental,' Loki agrees.

Clint barks a laugh. 'Definitely not the word I'd use for Bruce, but ok.'

'You say Bucky didn't recognise her when he shot her. I wonder if he did though,' he muses out loud.

'How do you mean?'

'He didn't kill her.'

Clint's quiet while he digests this information. 'Maybe, but we'll never know unless he gets those memories back. It doesn't matter though, because she associates that relationship with too much heartbreak and blood to go back to it.'

'A shame, they would do well together.'

'But you would do better,' Clint argues, 'you're just scared of getting too attached when you know it's most likely you'll outlive him.'

'There are many more things to consider rather than my own hurt, Barton, political as well as-'

'Oh don't give me that political bullshit. Yes he'll live longer than a normal human, but he's still going to die before it'll make any difference to your political marriage. And I'm not saying marry the guy, I'm saying take the plunge and have the relationship. Even if it's only when you're here on Earth. Even your life is too short for that kind of crap.'

Loki sighs. 'Something tells me you won't be giving me much choice in the matter for this celebratory period.'

'You've avoided catching him under the mistletoe because you're scared that when you do you're going to have to face all these things you're avoiding. So you're trying to encourage him to get back with Nat because you think they'd be happy together and it gives you a reason to not be with him.'

With anyone else Loki would have argued, but he feels he owes Clint the truth in all things after their past. He wonders if the archer suspects this and it's why he's confronting him about it. 'They have been some of the considerations, yes.'

'You do realise how much Tony would crucify you if I told him right?'

'You're threatening me with telling Tony? Do you really think we're five?'

Clint just grins at him. 'No, but I did get him to let me move one of the mistletoe sprigs to out here.'

'What?' Before he can process what Clint has said the archer points above his head, then darts in and presses a quick kiss to his lips. Loki barks out a laugh. 'You tricked me, Barton, I'm impressed.'

'Call me Clint,' he says, 'now I'm going to get Bucky out here so you can finish off your mistletoe challenge, and maybe even consider that relationship I mentioned.'

'Has Natasha told him of her thoughts and feelings?'

Clint pauses on his way back inside. 'Good point, no not yet. She was going to talk to him between Christmas and New Year. Didn't want to potentially cause a scene at Christmas.'

'Then I shall wait until New Year.'

'Fair,' Clint nods. 'Now stay there while I find a way to send him out.'

Loki just smiles and shakes his head fondly. Each visit it gets harder to leave this group of miscreants behind as their bonds strengthen.

'Clint asked me to bring this out, apparently he'd promised refills but then remembered he had to go get something for Cooper,' Bucky says, handing him a glass filled with what Loki suspects is Tony's best whiskey that the archer always manages to get access to. No matter what steps the inventor takes.

'Thank you. How goes the celebrations inside?'

'Thor wanted to start a drinking contest, but Laura said they couldn't do it with the kids around and Carol pointed out it would be rude to exclude the people who couldn't make it today so they've decided to do it at New Year. I think even Fury is thinking of getting involved.'

'Fury?'

'Well…I say he's thinking about, it's more Carol's teased him until he's been backed into a corner. We need to keep her around she makes Fury more human.'

Loki laughs. 'And she's entertaining in her own right.'

Bucky grins then turns to head inside. 'You coming?'

Loki nods and smiles. 'One moment first?'

'What do you need?'

He just points above Bucky's head then steps closer. Where he's darted in quickly with the others he instead give Bucky time to realise what is happening. 'I saved the best until last,' he says quietly against the soldier's lips before pressing against them, one hand tangling in Bucky's dark hair and the other going to his hip to pull him closer.

Bucky's response is instantaneous, and his hands tighten on Loki's waist, the metal ones digging in and he's sure he's going to have bruises there tomorrow. Loki surprises even himself by keeping the kiss gentle; where he'd left Peter and even Tony bright red with the passion he'd poured in, Bucky's was different.

He pulls away before his thoughts become too dangerous and takes a small step back. Bucky clears his throat, eyes unsure though his face remains fairly blank. Tellingly he's also keeping their mental link firmly closed, not that Loki can blame him since he's doing the same.

'We should head back in,' the soldier says.

'Indeed,' Loki hopes his voice isn't as strained as he thinks it is.

'There you are!' Sam shouts as they reenter. 'We're just calling an end to the mistletoe challenge. Please make me a happy man, Loki.'

'I do apologise, Valkyrie, I'm afraid the last barrel of mead goes to the Falcon,' Loki grins at her, trying not to notice the flash of hurt in the soldier's eyes as he walks past. Perhaps leaving him to last had not been the most sensible idea.

'It also means he gets first choice in partner for the snowball fight tomorrow,' Steve reminds them over Sam's cheers and Valkyrie's complaints.

'I should like, Captain, to concede my prize to another. Clint was the only one able to catch me unawares and since he managed to trick the god of trickery I think he deserves the prize instead,' he replies.

'Alright! Nat and I are wiping the floor with you all!' the archer crows, flashing him a smile.

'Shotgun Loki!' Peter shouts.

'Hey! What about me?' Wade protests.

'Dude we're going into a snowball fight, I want to be with the guy that can literally make snowballs with his powers.'