Disclaimer: I am not the owner of Fairy Tail

Following after Zeref, Makarov realized that this was likely the longest period of time he'd spent with the dark wizard. The other man was calm, seeming to be rather happy as they traveled on the island. "You know, if you are struggling with thoughts on leading your guild…I may be of some use there as well."

"You have experience in being a guild master?" It seemed unlikely.

Zeref chuckled, shaking his head. "Not exactly. Though…certain situations have placed me in a position of leadership. I am familiar with giving orders to others, and in speaking with those who perceive me to be younger than they are, at least."

Considering Zeref seemed to have been frozen in age as a teenager, it wasn't that surprising. "I appreciate the offer." Makarov ran a hand through his hair. "As much as I'd like to ask about it, I don't even know where to start. Lately, I've just been trying to make sure everyone feels welcome. Offering them someone to talk to about what isn't working to tell me what sort of guild they want to be a part of."

"That much should earn you some level of respect." Zeref continued on, tilting his head. "Though, it will only go so far. People will attempt to abuse that privilege if you are not careful. They will think they can use your trust to work things to their advantage, and then they'll be the ones leading the guild with you their mere puppet instead."

"Fairy Tail isn't a dark guild, and we're not trying to stab each other in the back, Zeref." Zeref always saw the worst in everyone, it seemed. "We're just looking out for each other right now. I'm starting to learn to rely more on my own judgment, and not theirs. Yet, it is difficult, when many of the members are still used to me being just an ordinary wizard."

"So it is the transition that is giving you issues instead?"

Makarov frowned, considering it. "In a way, I suppose. My former team, they seem to expect me to behave as I used to. I wasn't exactly known for following rules as a wizard, and even as the guild master, I can't say I'm fond of all the regulations and reprimands they give us for property destruction. We keep paying for the repairs anyway, so what harm has really been done?" He sighed, shaking his head. "Yet, I'm still not quite as reckless as I once was. I need to set an example for others, but I still hardly know what sort of example I need to be for them."

"For you, I'd recommend just being yourself." Makarov frowned.

"And show them to break the rules? Ha! The Council would have us all in cells and disbanded in less than a month."

Zeref shook his head. "Perhaps not in that sense." He paused for a moment, turning towards him. "I meant in how you act. From the moment I first met you…you show an uncanny amount of caring for others. You are kind, and you seek to protect those around you, regardless of if they need such protections or not. Teach your guild that kindness…to care for each other and act on behalf of your other members. Protect your own, and value each other as friends…just as you do with me. If that means breaking rules, so be it. Just make sure they understand that not all rules are meant to be broken."

Narrowing his eyes, Makarov studied him for a moment. "Uh huh. And how successful were you with this leadership strategy?"

"I am not the sort that can lead like that." Zeref tilted his head. "As you should know by now. However…I can say that I am far more successful than most might think, when it comes to getting others to follow me, regardless of my name or my past."

"Then maybe I will take your advice." Oddly, it seemed to fit with the direction their guild was going in as well. They'd be headaches for the magic council, but they'd be the family Makarov was hoping to create. "Though, some of the damage may have already been done. I should have found a way to go after Rob."

"And now the rune knights are on the case and you cannot do so discretely." Zeref smiled over at him. "I am sorry…I wish I could help, but I do not think I can. You…you will grow to move past mistakes, and learn from them. Lingering on what could have changed…it rarely makes for healthy decisions about the future." He paused, staring off in the distance. "Focusing on the past…is in part what drove me to where I am today. I could not move past the tragedy of my family…so I advise you to learn to move on, before you let such thoughts drive you to despair." Makarov nodded, wanting to ask more about his past. However, Zeref nodded towards his side. "You go ahead. If I lead…you will not see the pond as I wish for it to be. We are almost there, after all."

Leaving Zeref some distance, Makarov walked around him towards the direction they had been going. Following him made it more difficult to see how far away to remain, though he could practically sense where his aura of death magic ended now. It was such a familiar aura to him, despite how rarely he came to this island. Makarov knew it well, and while at first it terrified and unnerved him, he was growing to be comfortable around the dark magic. "You know, just because you want me to see this place alive doesn't mean you're going to stay away from it for long. I didn't come to this island to just sit around a lake alone."

"You came to remind me of the value of life." Zeref smiled faintly behind him, though Makarov didn't turn to see. "And to speak with someone about your problems whose judgment did not matter." It was true enough. Makarov found himself walking up a hill, and in the distance, he could hear the faint sounds of the river Zeref had mentioned before. "Both have been accomplished…was there something else you sought?"

Snorting, Makarov paused and glanced back at him. "You really don't get how friendships work, do you?" Zeref lifted his eyebrows in a silent question, while Makarov waved it off before the man could speak. "Yeah yeah, I get it. Your curse, living on an isolated island…you don't have many friends. I still figured this much would be obvious though." Pausing, Makarov sighed. "Friends don't just spend time with each other to gain things or complain, Zeref. We hang out together to have fun…and I'm not about to stop you from hanging out with me just because a few plants are going to die in the process."

"I think it will be more than just a few, Makarov."

"And you haven't killed plants on this island before?" Zeref did not reply, while Makarov grinned. "They grow back, because that's how nature works. Things die, and new things are born all the time. You're just…speeding along the death side for a bit, that's all." Zeref still seemed to frown, looking doubtful. "I mean…it helps with overpopulation! Yeah, Porlyusica was telling me that it's a bad thing to have too much of a lifeform in a small area. They can't all survive, and die off quickly, so really, you're helping this island out by killing off some of its oh-so-many plants."

"That isn't quite how it works, Makarov. Overpopulation typically resolves itself through starvation and by feeding other organisms until it reaches a reasonable—"

"Damn, you really would get along with her well, wouldn't you?" Makarov chuckled, shaking his head. "I figured you'd be all well-read too, since you went to some fancy magic school, but I thought that would give you a focus on, well, magic, not this."

"A well-rounded education was what was offered. I simply spent the majority of my time studying magic, while ignoring extra research in more…common subjects."

"What sort of magic were you interested in back then? I mean, you weren't always focused on living magic, right?" Makarov glanced at him, seeing Zeref frown. "It's not like that sort of thing is popular. In fact, it's sorta banned from use completely. Makes me wonder what you were studying for classes, really."

He was starting to think Zeref wouldn't answer. Zeref had stopped walking, and Makarov had arrived at a slight clearing in the forest. He blinked, seeing a small pool of water in the center, with small wildflowers growing within the grass at the shore. The breeze would send ripples across the surface, with leaves falling into it from the nearby trees as well. It looked lively and colorful, just like the rest of the island. There was a place where rocks seemed to be placed by someone for sitting. He wondered if Zeref had brought them here, after being on the island for so long. They were one of the few nonliving things he could use, after all, since his magic seemed to go so far as to decay away tree stumps if he was nearby.

After staring around, Zeref spoke for a moment. "I…wanted a challenge." He made no comment about the lake, and Makarov was surprised he didn't change the subject. "With the war, however, I also wanted to avoid fighting. I always despised the idea of rushing into battle for no reason other than to fight and kill. It seemed so pointless, back then. The entire thing, really." He was standing still, gazing up at the sky above him. "So, I focused on technical magic that really served no purpose in battle. Telepathy was the first I mastered…and then I moved on to teleportation, followed by wards…really, anything that seemed like it would make me useless in war, but gave me a better grasp on the fundamentals of magic. The entire time, my main goal however…was the development of what you now call living magic."

"You created it yourself?" Zeref nodded, and Makarov blinked. "That's impressive. I can't say I've heard of a wizard these days capable of inventing their own branch of magic. The most recent one was Archive Magic I think, and even that was created about twenty years ago, just before I was born."

"I don't typically talk about these things, you know." Zeref stared at him now, glancing towards the lake. Makarov stood on the shore, his back to the water to face Zeref while they spoke. "My past…I usually feel as if it is best to leave it alone. To forget it. Many…many things I've done were horrible. I've killed, and I've destroyed so much with what I've created."

"And do you regret what you've done?"

Makarov expected him to say yes. Zeref seemed so guilty about all of the death he caused, after all. "Actually, I don't think I do." He stared at the man, uncertain of what it meant. He didn't regret all of the deaths he'd caused? Zeref seemed kind enough to wish people had survived. "There were some things that came about…that were worth this, I think. Perhaps that means I am more selfish than I am willing to admit. Perhaps it means I really never cared for others in the first place at all." He looked towards Makarov, tilting his head. "Do you think that makes me a monster? For being pleased with the results of what I've done, despite the cost?"

Looking away, Makarov swallowed. He wanted to say no, but he knew too much of Zeref's history to agree. How could he not want it to change? To save lives? With the aura of death around him, it was clear he valued life right now. "It—I suppose it depends. On what exactly it was you were so glad to have gained."

"Natsu." He said the word slowly, almost reverently. That demon was so important to Zeref, yet Makarov could hardly understand why. "I…remember how I told you to make sure you mourn your losses, Makarov? To move past death?" Makarov nodded slowly, his back towards the man. "I did not. That was what drove me to living magic…for Natsu was the one person I had lost that I could not fathom the reason for his death. He did not deserve such a fate…and if he still lives, then I still think all of this suffering was worth it. I would give anything…to keep him alive, Makarov. To keep him alive until I, too, find myself dying by his side." Zeref slowly began to approach him, entering the clearing by the pond. The trees began to die, becoming less alive as he neared. Makarov didn't care so much, since he preferred to be able to talk a bit more quietly, despite no one being around to overhear them. "Is that reason enough to make me human, Makarov? Or am I just as monstrous as the beings I've created?"

He didn't know what to say. Thinking of what he'd lost, Makarov didn't know what he would do. Would he sacrifice so much to see his father again? If he'd been asked during one of his previous visits to Zeref, he likely would have said yes. The loss had been more recent, and he had not quite accepted it then. Now, he was used to his absence. Zeref, however, claimed he had not allowed himself to accept that loss. He was still trapped in that grief, in being alone without this Natsu. Then, he'd lost Mavis as well, not long after meeting her from what Makarov had seen in her memories.

After a moment, he gazed over at Zeref, seeing the way he seemed to be staring at his own legs. Zeref…hated himself, Makarov realized. He'd despised everything he'd done, and refused to let anyone say otherwise. It was why he refused Makarov's kindness as a child, and why he needed Makarov to insist that they were friends. He couldn't understand why anyone would want such a connection with himself. He had already decided on his answer to that question, without Makarov's response.

Sitting down, Makarov studied him for just a moment longer. "You are not a monster for being lost to your grief, Zeref." The man's head lifted, meeting his gaze. "I cannot say I would've done the same, but I don't think any two people deal with loss the same way." Goldmine definitely hadn't dealt with the loss of Rob the same as he did, nor did Porlyusica or Bob. When Yuri died, the entire guild had shifted in mood, some openly crying with others throwing themselves into work like Makarov had done. They were all different, just like Zeref was. "You knew what you had lost, and you fought to protect Natsu in the only way you understood. If my father were still alive today, I cannot say I'd be able to be angry at the force that brought him back to me, nor would I regret what had been sacrificed to do so. Perhaps that means I'm just as selfish as you, but either way, I don't think anyone would be able to be sad because of a loved one returning to life, Zeref."

"You…you are always surprising me, Makarov." Zeref smiled faintly, lowering his gaze. "With your views and attachment to life, I suspected knowing would change your opinion. That you'd agree with me about what sort of person I am."

"No one is beyond redemption, Zeref. No one is past the point of forgiveness. That's how I like to view the world." He looked over at the man, who was still smiling faintly. "Perhaps the law is harsh in that sense, but if you are trying to be a better person, trying to do good for others, then I cannot say you are truly at fault for what has happened. I may not quite understand how you came by this curse, or how Natsu is related to what you've done, but I do know that you've followed your own heart in the process, and have done what you thought was right."

"Even if what I thought was right…was killing? Destruction?"

Zeref always saw the darkest possibility. Makarov could tell that much, and his self-hatred ran deep. He might not be able to overcome it so easily, but he could try and make the man see things differently. "Not all paths are straight-forward, Zeref. You grew up during a time of war. I cannot say I've experienced the same thing." He gazed at the water, frowning. "As I said before, death is a part of life. It isn't something that can be stopped, and without being there, I can't say if it was wrong to choose that path."

Zeref was quiet after that, sitting calmly where they'd came in to the pond. The sun was starting to set, and Makarov was starting to realize how long he'd been on the island for. After a moment, he sighed, realizing that Zeref would likely be taking some time to think instead. Gazing at the water, he shrugged, pulling off his shirt and deciding he might as well make the most of this break. It felt a bit strange, with Zeref watching him right behind him, but it wasn't like he hadn't gone swimming with friends before. Maybe it was the silence that made it odd, or perhaps the memories of Mavis seeing him as a lover and not a friend. Either way, Makarov did his best to ignore it, before walking into the pond, letting himself float on the surface for a moment. He saw a flicker of light on the shore, and after a moment, he noticed a fire lighting near the rocks he'd seen before. He didn't realize there was a place to contain a fire over there, but it seemed as if Zeref truly had set it up. He didn't know if Zeref intended on Makarov lingering on the island for long, but he smiled faintly at his foresight. It was only showing that Zeref was growing to appreciate their friendship as well, just as Makarov was.

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