The Rokubi, Saiken, was nowhere near Kirigakure.

The foolish jinchuuriki drifted for ages and ages at sea, then on solid land, looking for the demon slug, said to have the power to corrode anything and everything.

"That's odd," Gyuuki said. "Saiken's chakra...is acting up really strangely."

"Yeah," said Son Goku. "It was hard to tell from so far away, but as we keep getting closer and closer...it's like his chakra is leaking out."

The water near the shore was an acrid green; there was no sign of any aquatic life.

And the mist...the mist just wouldn't let up.

Many foreigners who hadn't been to the Land of Water had many misconceptions about the place. It was assumed that only the Mist Village itself was...well, shrouded in mist.

Clearly that wasn't the case. As they reached closer and closer, the grass turned browner and browner. The trees were totally devoid of any leaves, and a foul smell emanated from the earth.

For some reason, bubbles upon bubbles filled the air.

And then out of nowhere...

"JUST WAIT OVER THERE, UTAKATA-SHISHOU. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH THE HERBS."

It was a young girl about the same age as Fuu and Naruto.

She was obviously a ninja, but she had also obviously had a problem with using indoor voices. A short girl with long brownish-blonde hair and striking green eyes. She wasn't wearing the shinobi uniform or hitai-ate of any village, but rather a purple kimono.

And she slammed right into an oblivious Naruto.

"OWWW."

"That hurts! Watch where you're going!" she snapped.

"Watch where I'm going? You're the one who ran right into me," Naruto snapped right back, rubbing his sore head.

She softened a little at that. "I'm sorry, but my master isn't feeling well and I have to collect some herbs right now."

"Your master isn't feeling well?" Roshi asked.

That, on top of the strange news about Saiken, was enough to set the alarm bells ringing in everyone's heads.

"Have you tried giving him ramen?" asked Naruto. Never mind. Maybe not ringing in everyone's heads.

"...What?"

"Ramen fixes everything. It's like a magic bullet or a wonder drug," Naruto said in a dead-serious voice. "One time, when I was training with – "

"Naruto, stop making everything about ramen," Yugito scolded. Then she turned to the young girl. "Please take us to your master. I'm sure we can find a way to fix him."

Anybody would have been very suspicious if a group of heavily armed foreign strangers offered to "fix" their sick master, but this was a group that Naruto was in. And he was the kind of guy who would keep smiling a ridiculously happy smile and shooting passersby thumbs-up signs, so he drastically decreased the group's threatening aura.

Which was how Hotaru, the student of Utakata, jinchuuriki of Saiken, led the band of foolish jinchuuriki to her sick master.

"Sorry I'm late, Deidara-senpai!" said a robed, masked man. "It's just that I met an old lady who had a bunch of bags to carry, and her house was so far away, and she had arthritis, so I helped her! She gave me some candy and told me that I'm a good boy!"

"Tobi, what the hell." Deidara gave his partner in crime a withering look. "You're a member of Akatsuki. You need to act cool and awesome...like me. You can't be openly helping old people like that...it's uncool."

"Tobi joined the Akatsuki to make the world a better place," Tobi said proudly. "I want to make a world where old ladies don't have to carry heavy bags when they have arthritis and no one is there to help."

Deidara glanced at Tobi from the corner of his eye. There were times when he wasn't sure if Tobi's happy-go-lucky idiot personality was a hoax or not. Judging from the tone of voice, he sounded...very serious about changing the world.

Who even joined the Akatsuki to be a good boy and make the world a better place for old ladies with arthritis? Tobi was a moron.

"I love jinchuuriki spy duty, Deidara-senpai, what about you?" said Tobi, as they peered through the gloom at the team of jinchuuriki. "That kid Naruto...he reminds me of me. When I was a kid, I wanted to be Hokage too."

Yep. Tobi was a moron.

Although that was the most information that Deidara had received about Tobi, ever. For all of his goofing off and joking around, Tobi was a man of mystery.

"Do you want a lollipop, Deidara-senpai?" Tobi asked, stuffing one into Deidara's hand.

"No."

"Come on, it tastes delicious!"

"I said no, un!"

The mouth on his hand surreptitiously licked the lollipop though.

Damn it. The lollipop was delicious.

"So...what are they doing, senpai?" Tobi gazed at the sight of a young girl leading the team around a deserted field.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out, Tobi!"

"Tell Tobi if you figure it out, okay, senpai?"

"Un."

A/N: As always, thanks for the reviews, ThisIsStorm101, RedFistCannon, Jac Frust, Obitou, BadReader, and UltimateGenius, and keep them coming!

Why is Utakata sick, and what will happen next? Stay tuned to find out! :)