A/N; Just finished season 6 and Luke acts super cold and we have seen that throughout the seasons at different times and I am not sure if it's past feelings resurfacing or it's an attachment issue but I think it's something that should have been discussed more as I worry he will have more episodes like that unless he tries to stop it, which is what I am trying to say in this chapter. Enjoy.

Just Hold Me

Chapter Fourteen

At the hospital, April had fallen asleep on one of the chairs in the room, curled up and comfortable and Rory was trying to fight her eyes closing even though she was exhausted.

"Sleep honey, I am fine," Lorelai told her from across the room as Rory fell into a deep slumber, just as Emily walked in.

"This is ridiculous! Them pillows are something you would find in a second-hand shop after your ordeal you will think they would provide better quality" Emily half-shouted.

"Shh the girls are asleep," Luke said pointing to them. Richard and Emily had gone to find better quality bedding and a better room.

"This is a disgrace, their water in this jug is warm, I am going to find that nurse, how useless," Emily said turning back around and heading out the door as Richard followed her with calls of Emily.

"Just you and I now butch" Lorelai replied quietly so as not to wake the sleeping youngsters.

"Yes I want to say sorry as I have the chance, I am the biggest idiot on the planet, I treated you like dirt and you deserve so much better than that" Luke said also quietly.

"I should have told you it was upsetting me" Lorelai replied, knowing she should have spoken to him instead of blowing up on him.

"I know when you are hurting, I can tell just by looking at you, I saw it, I don't know if I didn't care or I chose to ignore it but I knew you were miserable, I will never forgive myself for the way I behaved towards you, my actions were a disgrace, I am not surprised you got sick of waiting, if it had been the other way around I would have too, I can't change the past," Luke told her. Lorelai sighed and grabbed his hand.

"Remember when Jess and Rory got into the car accident and we had that huge fight and didn't talk for weeks?" Lorelai asked him. Luke nodded even if he had no idea where it was going.

"You said you weren't angry at me, and you told you I wanted Luke back and you said you were standing there, but it wasn't you, yes in body you were there but you weren't my Luke, you were cold and distant" Lorelai replied. Luke stroked her hand and nodded.

"That's how it was the last few months, I lost you again, you were there in body but the Luke I loved wasn't there, it was a different you, I had already lost you, my Luke was gone, that was the most heartbreaking part, I had no idea if he would ever return" Lorelai admitted biting her lip.

"I know...I get into slumps like that, I don't know why, I think I need to fix everything in my life before I can move onto the next thing, but I am here now, you breaking up with me made me return, that clone Luke is gone, I don't expect anything, I just want to be friends" Luke told her. Lorelai looked at him and saw his eyes were bright and loving, the last few months she couldn't see into them, it was like there was a fog in them which was closing himself off from there, they were cold and bored, she didn't know how to explain it, but she let a tear fall as she saw he was back.

"I will go to counselling, see if I can fix it, I don't want to get like this again, sometimes it all builds up, past feelings of worthlessness and my parents and childhood, bad memories flood to the surface, maybe I need to try let them go or change the way I see them so I can let you in" Luke replied and Lorelai smiled.

"If you feel you need too, you don't have too" Lorelai replied. "I am sorry about Christopher, I regret it, I wanted you to feel the same amount of pain I had felt all them months and I knew it would hurt you, I didn't want you to forgive me because if you hated me you wouldn't have to be in my life, clearly my plan backfired" Lorelai replied. She couldn't believe after all these months they were talking properly. Luke opened his mouth to reply but April started speaking in her sleep.

"Argon, Arsenic, Astatine, Barium" she muttered. Lorelai giggled to herself.

"What she saying?" she asked. Luke smiled.

"She says the periodic table in her sleep," he told her. Lorelai laughed.

"Rory used to quote Shakespeare in her sleep when she was younger, I learned Roman and Juliet from it" Lorelai replied. Luke smiled and laughed.

"I am glad she came," Lorelai told him feeling touched

"She loves you, and don't worry I don't care what Anna says, I am not letting her push me around anymore if I want you to see her you will," Luke told her.

"I am not sure that is wise, she's already making me fall in love, I might end up robbing her and taking her to the Crap Shack" Lorelai joked, Luke laughed.

"She will end up a mini-you, please don't" Luke replied.

"Don't pretend not to love it" Lorelai replied staring at him.

"Well, I will admit I am glad you didn't go away after I gave you that coffee," he told her. Lorelai hugged him and she rubbed his back.

"ROMEO, ROMEO WHERE ART THEE ROMEO" Rory shouted out in her sleep making them jump apart. Luke laughed.

"I think she still quotes Shakespeare," he told her looking at her, feeling his heart burst in happiness.