As the crowd poured into the magnificent church, Chip, Mike, and Quentin stayed off to the side. They would need to find a safer way in. If Jack was in there, confronting him with several hundred of his followers ready to attack at a moments notice would not be the most intelligent idea. Even a rushed attack that ended with a wounded Jack likely wouldn't lend itself to a possible escape for the rest of the Toons. Once the final Toons had entered the church, the doors were quickly snapped shut as the three stood outside and waited. "This place is huge! How do you think he got the money for this?" Chip ran his hand over the smooth metal wall.
"For this? How did he afford this entire town? It's probably all a trick just like everything else. Anyways, we don't got time for questions. We need to figure out a way of getting in here. Help me find a window or somethin'!" Mike broke away and started to investigate the sides. Most of the windows were much higher off the ground than the entrance, and the trio was soon frustrated by their lack of luck.
"This was a stupid plan to begin with. He probably already knows we're here and called everyone here to protect him. You think someone with the power to create an entire town can't keep his eyes on some small town yokel and two random Toons from Toontown? We're fooling ourselves. We should just turn around now and head home. We know we're safe. We can bring help back. We can get the Rangers involved. Hell, don't you think Mickey can do something? He's been around forever!" Crossing his arms, Quentin rapped his fingers against his arms. "We tried and we failed, let's just call it a day."
Chip threw up his arms. "We've been here for like two minutes and you're already giving up. Besides, did you see any cars here? You know it's hundreds of miles to Toontown? Who knows what will happen by the time we get back. Before we start resorting to our last chance, why don't we just think for a minute?"
"Both you, can you quiet down!" Mike hollered, shutting up the arguing pair. "One of you, toss me your pumpkins, I'm going in."
"I'm not gonna argue there." Quentin joyfully responded as he started to release his head from the pulpy prison. "Stupid thing is stuck!" The black cat could not see that Chip was pushing down and keeping it in place.
The brown monkey waited for Quentin to stop struggling. "Before we do, tell us what the plan is. We're not just going to let you walk in there or something crazy without hearing a plan!"
"Ugh don't worry 'bout me. Listen, if what Quentin said is right and he knows we're here, why bother hiding it. We just need to fool the pumpkin heads long enough to get close. I lure him in, and then I introduce this blade to his chest. You two can wait out here if you want. Hopefully once he's dead his spell will be broken and won't have to worry about them doing whatever they would to to me when they see me attackin' their leader. If not... Well I guess I'm goin' down too. Then you both will know and can start makin' your way outta this God-forsaken place. All I ask is that if you flee back to Toontown, take The Banana with ya. Please don't leave her there alone, alright?" Mike shook himself, mentally preparing for what would happen next. "Please don't tell her what happened to me. She'll forget about me soon enough, best to just let sleeping dogs lie, alright?"
"Mike, you're not going to die, alright? We're going in as a team. We'll stick to the original plan. We bring you up as you came to apologize and give in, and to beg for forgiveness. Drop to your knees and wait for him to lower his guard. When he does, you attack. We'll back you up. I think most of these are dummies anyways, so we aren't really hurting anyone. I didn't see anybody with a weapon, so I think we can tear our way through them. How does that sound to you guys?" Chip knelt and acted out the roles as he walked through the plan. "I'm not leaving here without those Toons. There are families who are relying on me. Including my own. I can't come back empty-handed."
The purple rabbit stood up and gripped Chip's shoulder. "Yer a good Toon, monkey. If'n we get out of all this I'm makin' sure both of you are handsomely rewarded. Anyway, it looks like the last few Toons are headed in. We better join em' if we're blendin in'." Mike waited for the last group of pumpkin-heads to enter the Church before hopping behind them, joined by Quentin and Chip with their knives outstretched into his back. As they entered the magnificent structure, they were in awe. Large, silk tapestries detailing Jack in extraordinary clothing lined the room. Stain-glass windows of pumpkins and other various novelties bled colored light onto the seated Toons. Rows of solid gold pews were filled to the brim. Most of the churchgoers were fitted with heads that were not their own. A couple of normal Toons would pop-up every couple heads, but they were certainly the minority. Chip had to assume that all pumpkin-heads were dummies and the rest weren't if his plan was going to go accordingly. He couldn't kill an innocent Toon, and he was banking on his own intuition. At the front, a Toon played a large organ. The piano was orange and the legs looked like the stems from a pumpkin. Jack really went all out on his decorations. This guy really loved pumpkins.
The lime green duck stood in front of the crowd. His robes were black with pumpkin ensigns and he had a presence that seemed to tower over everybody else. "My fellow Pumpkin-Heads! Today is finally the day that we find salvation! For too long we have sat by idly and watched while the world has taken us for granted! We have been mocked for our faith, and kicked when we were down! But no longer! No, we will show the world the true power of the Gourd! We will use our eternal life and mystical powers to convince them all to join us! Anybody who stands in our way will no longer be tolerated! Obedience will be expected! Anybody who strays from His command will be punished severely!" As Jack continued his speech, the trio of sane Toons snuck in and hid behind the back row of a bench.
"This guy is insane!" Chip whispered to the other two, who could only nod along quietly. "Okay, Mike. We're going to need to act like we just caught you and dragged you out. Fight back a little bit, but not too hard. I'm not fighting you too. You're going to have to do all the talking. I'm not really sure how those pumpkin-heads talk, and we might be a dead give-away. Do you think you can do that?"
"Don't really have a choice, do I? Come on now, let's do this before I change my mind." Mike leapt out from behind the churchgoers into the main pathway to the front as if he had been thrown. Quickly rushing from behind were Chip and Quentin, aggressively holding out their knives. Mike crawled along the orange carpet as he kept his head up looking at Jack. "Mr. O'Kazam. I apologize fer interruptin yer speech but I have come here to be ya for forgiveness. I can't take it anymore. I can't continue livin' my life that way. I'm here on my knees, beggin' ya ta please allow me to give myself up to Him, to bask in His glory and to join eternal salvation. I don't belong there, I belong here with my town. Please, find it in yer' heart to give me a chance."
The rows of Toons had all turned to stare at the pathetic figure who was groveling just feet away from their leader. Turning their attention to Jack, they waited patiently for the next steps, as if they were unable to act without direct order. "Oh, Mr. Mike. I see that you have finally come around to see the error of your ways. Or... That is what you would like me to say, I presume. You must think of me quite the fool to think I would fall for such a simple trick. You and your lackeys here." Jack paused and held out his staff, pointing to Quentin and Chip. "I've been watching you three since you have arrived in Funny Farms. I am a bit disappointed in you Quentin. I thought you would be the star of my show. But it appears that expecting a heathen to change his ways is beyond even the powers of Him. As for you Mike, I believe you are not here to repent, but rather for revenge. Again, I ask you. Why do you have such anger in your heart? All I have done is take this yokel town and bring it to salvation. An eternity of life, happiness, and health. All He has asked for in return is your unrequited love, and it appears that is too difficult for you three. Monkey, Quentin, throw down your weapons. I do not intend to harm you two. I will not hold your own misunderstandings against you. However, I can no longer allow this act of retribution by our good mayor here to go unpunished. How fitting that the Great Pumpkin requires a sacrifice, and we have a willing one right here. Actually, I must thank you three for being so willing. Usually it is so much more of a challenge to gather volunteers." Jack stepped down from his heightened platform, directly above Mike. Stretching out his hand, he lifted the rabbit's chin and gazed into Mike's eyes. "Soon you will understand the foolishness of your actions."The next few moments were a blur for the three Toons. Mike turned around and grabbed the knife from Chip, slamming it down and piercing his adversary's foot. The scream of pain alerted the crowds of the imminent danger both for Jack. All rising in one slick motion, the zombie-like Toons flooded the corridor and began to surround the three Toons who were now backing into each other. The green duck had dug the knife from his foot and the hardened wood beneath him, tossing it aside he limped backwards with the help of his staff. "Show them no mercy!" Jack screamed.
"Couldn't have given us a chance first?" Quentin called out as he swung his weapon and caught the stomach of a dark red crocodile, causing sand to pour out onto the floor. Even though the horde was unarmed, it did not stop the group from quickly overwhelming the trio. Chip, now unarmed as his knife had been used on Jack had to resort to hand combat. He wasn't a very experienced fighter, and it showed. "Screw this!" The black cat held out his knife like a lance, and charged forward. Anybody not quickly enough was barreled into, like a lance Quentin pushed his way through until he reached the open door. As quickly as he had opened a gaping hole, it was plugged by more Toons who were more focused on the easy prey in front of them than the scurrying cat. Feeling sweat drenching his forehead, he bit his knuckles and dodged outside. "You guys are on your own!"
"Damn it, Quentin!" Chip cried out, using a swinging kick to send an orange monkey flying into a smaller crowd. "Mike, looks like we're on our own!" Chip dropped to the ground and began searching for the knife. He didn't want to use it, but it didn't look like he had any other choice. The chatter from among the crowd of Toons made it difficult to hear his partner in fighting, but he breathed a sigh of relief as he saw the purple rabbit connect a fist with what appeared to be a pumpkin, causing bits of the fruit to fly throughout the room.
Sliding between a small gap, Mike joined the monkey back to back. "I think I see tha knife, we just need to fight out way over to it. We get over there and maybe we can break through and get to Jack." The green duck was nursing his foot cursing at the pair, shaking his staff and making other vague threats. "I don't think he's gettin' anywhere." Mike pointed to a small gleam that was coming from behind the crowd where a ray of light had beamed in through one of the windows. "Shame yer friend ended up bein' a damn coward."
"Whatever, let's just worry about getting out of here alive." The duo swung, kicked, bit, and scratched. Chip had discovered the pumpkins were quite fragile and prone to easy destruction, and once they were leaving their bodies useless. While there were still the regular hypnotized Toons, it was easier to fight them off when not being held by six other enemies. At one point the small yellow monkey resembling his sister had appeared, and much to his dismay Chip had knocked her head off. "Sorry, Anna..." He whispered. As they broke through, the sharp object became closer to view, and now they were just a few feet away.
"I can see it, Chip. Gimme a boost and Imma jump over this crowd!" The brown monkey immediately dropped to his hands and knees, creating a small platform for the older rabbit to ascend. Balancing himself on the unstable Toon, Chip looked over the wave and closed his eyes. There was nobody else going for it and this was his best chance. Jack was unguarded and immobile. "On three! One... Two... THREE!" Mike was hardly able to finish his word before he was blasted up and over from a leaping jump from Chip. Fortunately for the mayor, it was a soft blow when he landed on his feet. Reaching down for the knife, he was shocked when a red foot stepped down, pinning his foot to the ground. Looking up, Mike's worst nightmare was coming to fruition. A red deer with purple, swirling eyes stared down at him, emotionless. "The Apple. Great timing, help me get this knife and we're gonna get you outta' here hon!"
The Apple continued to stare emotionless as the chaos ensued around them. "You are a fool. Release yourself to Him, embrace Him! He will bring eternal salvation!"
"Damn it, The Apple! This ain't you! I know you're hurtin' but think 'bout yer sister! She needs ya! There ain't a thing as eternal salvation, and nobody being brought back from the dead. Everything you see is just a trick on your mind. Yer mind is fooled. Jack is just a magician pulling tricks on you. Please, wake up!" Mike struggled to release his hand from the grip of The Apple's foot which pinned down even tighter, crushing the bones in his wrist. From behind him, a voice cried out.
"All of you, I demand silence!" Jack hobbled up, holding up his hand he waddled down the stairs over to where Mike was ducked down on the ground, unable to release himself from the deer's grip. "I came here to offer you the greatest gift one could receive. Time and time again you have refrained, even against your better judgement. I gave you what you wanted and left you to be, and still you come here and disrupt my ceremonies. How dare you? You think that you understand what is best for us? Well you do not! You are no better than my brother. Taunting me, insulting me. He never understood and neither do you! I made the mistake of not silencing him when I had the chance, I will not make that mistake again. I may have failed to save Toontown, but I will not let you stop me from saving this town! You will get the honor of being the important sacrifice to Him! May you take great honor in your fate! I hope you have made your peace, and you better hope that He is more forgiving than I am!" Clapping his hands, the duck watched as three of the still-intact Pumpkin-Heads walked over and took hold of Mike. Chip now stood, unchallenged and alone, unsure of what to do.
The purple rabbit was flipped into his back with the help of the three Pumpkin-Heads and The Apple who all kept a limb pinned under their feet. "Ha, you ain't Toon enough to kill me. Yer just a crazy kook who believes a pumpkin has come to save us all. I'll make sure that when I kill ya, yer whole congregation here sees. Sees that they were led astray by a nobody." Mike spit up, nearly hitting Jack. "Yer nothin', Jack. Nothing!"
The green duck became increasingly angrier, slamming the blunt edge of his staff into the ground, he began to guffaw sarcastically. Chip began to crawl away until he was hidden behind one of the golden benches, watching anxiously as he tried to make some sort of plan. Why did Quentin have to be Quentin? This was there chance. "Hey, Jack!" The monkey bellowed, cupping his hands and listening as his words echoed off the metallic walls. Everybody stopped and turned to face him, suddenly reminded of his existence. "Um, let him go!"
"Ah yes, Chip. The silly monkey who came here to rescue everybody. I've been watching you since you set foot in the desert. It has been quite adorable watching you struggle, thinking that you could ever compare to Him. In a way I almost feel pity for you, as you don't recognize what a fool you are. Your friend, Quentin was it? He's a fool too, but he seems irredeemable. You stayed behind. I think you understand your fate and want to accept Him. Is that not true?" Jack held out his hands, as he stepped over Mike and approached the chimp. "You know, I really think we could do great things together. I sense in you a great wanting of power. Imagine, ruling all of Toontown. That foolish place is in need of salvation. Run by morons and idiots who only look out for themselves. Sending a single Toon here to search out a hundred willing participants? Ridiculous! Imagine if you were in charge, what you could do for your family. Join us, give your soul to Him! You will truly understand eternal salvation!
Mike looked up pleadingly with his eyes as Chip seemed to struggle with what he heard. "You really think I could be in charge of Toontown?" The brown monkey began to slowly walk towards Jack, keeping his eyes fixated on the duck. "No more listening to those fools, struggling to scrape by on these terrible jobs?"
"Chip, what'er doin'? He's messin' with your mind! It's all a trick!" The purple rabbit cried out before a foot shoved his face into the carpeting where his words were muffled.
"Don't listen to him, Chip. He has witnessed your incredible power. You know, I really could use a second in command here. Somebody who can watch Toontown, to help spread His word. What do you say? Do you really want to be remembered as someone who failed his family and his town?" Chip was now face to face with Jack, feet away from the struggling body of his comrade. Kneeling, he buried his face into his knee, he held his hands together. Jack laughed uproariously. "Sorry, Mike. It looks as if even he has seen the light. Now, I hope you have no further words, because..."
As Jack continued, the loud sound of an engine roared as a large white van came crashing backwards through the front doors of the church. Back doors flying open, Quentin peered his head out of the driver's seat window and waved away the smoke from the rubble. "Hurry up and get in here before I change my mind!" Chip took the opportunity, standing up he swung a fist and connected directly with Jack's bill. Knocking the duck away from his staff which had stayed in the air momentarily, Chip grabbed the weapon and begun to swung his way over to Mike. Knocking heads, he soon freed Mike and lifted him to his feet.
"C'mon, Mike. Let's get out of here!" The pair flew through the Pumpkin-Heads and hypnotized Toons who stood idly waiting for a command from their leader.
"Don't just stand there! Stop them! They have the Lord's staff!" Jack screamed. As he did, the chaos ensued as the Toons began to give chase. With the exception of one red deer who leaned over and grabbed the knife near her feet. Closing her eyes, she stuck out her tongue and took aim.
Quentin waved on the pair. "Hurry up, I'm not waiting here all day!" As he waved, a loud grunting sound came from Mike who hopped into the back, joined by Chip who slammed the doors closed.
"Get us the hell out of here!" Chip pounded on the back of the van and felt as the rubber burned and the van was off, leaving behind Jack and the remainder of the zombies. Chip and Quentin whooped and hollered, chuckling as they called back and forth from inside of the van. "You came back for us!"
"Well, I figured you did promise me a reward and all that. Plus I found this van parked on the side of the church! Couldn't write this better if I tried! Anyways, how's Mike!" Quentin kept his eyes forward as he flew down the streets of Funny Farms, out to a place where they could safely make their next moves.
Chip smiled and looked down at the rabbit who was laying on his back, gripping his shirt. Immediately his face dropped. "Mike! Mike what's wrong, man?" The purple rabbit, unable to speak, gingerly pointed to his back and mouthed for Chip to turn him over. On command, the brown monkey flipped over his friend and hollered in horror. "Oh, Cog! Quentin! Pull over and get back here!" The van came to a screeching halt and the sound of footsteps pounding the pavement gave way to the back doors opening.
The black cat adjusted his glasses in a panic and threw up his hands. "What!"
"They got Mike! Look! They must have got him in the back when we were getting away!" Sure enough the same knife that Mike had used to stab Jack in the foot was now protruding from the bunny's back. "We need to get him to a hospital!"
"Where do you think we're going to find a hospital around here! We would need to get to Toontown. I guess we could try to get to Alternate Funny Farms but then we'd have to ditch the van somewhere nobody would find it!" Quentin wiped his brow and looked around. I think we can get it out, we just need something to clean it out!"
Mike pounded his fist into the flexible metal flooring, causing it to flatten and pop back up. "Damn it, you two just listen!" Mike struggled to get the words out of his mouth as he grimaced in pain. "I'm not gonna make it fellas. I just need you to make me a promise."
"You're going to be alright, Mike. Just hang in there and we're going to get you to a doctor!" Chip pressed down on Mike's back, struggling to keep the blood from spilling through the Toon's shirt. "Just... come on!"
"Listen you two!" Mike awkwardly turned over to his side to better face his friends. "Even if I do get meself to a doctor, ain't gonna be much they're gonna be able ta do. At that point yer just wastin yer' time and puttin' everyone at risk. Just please promise me something... Promise me that you protect The Banana, and everyone else in the town. Don't let that booger-colored stain become a permanent part of this town... and for the love of Cog, don't tell anybody what happened to me. Don't want anybody knowin' that I died. Tell them I left and ain't come back. Please just promise me that..." Chip clenched the rabbit's hand and nodded his head, unable to speak. The trio sat in silence watching as the rabbit struggled for air, gasping between bursts of pain in his chest and back before finally succumbing to his injury. Eyes shutting, Mike went limp and felt to the wayside.
Chip, ignoring Quentin's motioning slid out of the van and stared off into the distance where the top of the church was still visible. "We'll make sure they pay for this Mike. That duck is going to pay and we're bringing everyone home..."