Twelve: Frosted

Chat deals with the chilly hand he's been dealt while he awaits Ladybug.

I wasn't sure what was worse: being stuck inside a giant ice cube, forced to listen to Lila drone on endlessly about her plans for dominating Paris, or the fact that my stomach was rumbling rather loudly, a reminder that it had been quite some time since either Plagg or I had recharged. Given how muted the light in the massive sewer junction room was, it was hard to judge the passage of time in any truly effective way; glancing up at Lila, I realized she was all that stood between a very hungry feline and the homemade beef stew with all the trimmings Tom had happily proclaimed would be our dinner that evening.

It was never good to get between Chat Noir and food, a lesson that Marinette had learned fairly early in our relationship. Partly I'd been making up for lost time, given how restrictive the diet Gabriel had put me on had been, mindful of his need to keep me to a certain figure in order to model for the family business; long before she'd known who was under the mask, Marinette had sensed how hard it had been for me to make up any calories the massive uptick in my metabolism the Miraculous created. She'd quickly taken to plying me with just about anything that was on hand at the bakery – much to my everlasting appreciation. To be honest, I wasn't entirely sure I would have survived being Chat Noir without the supplemental meals her family had provided the stray kitty she'd adopted.

Looking up at Lila again from beneath my bangs, I instead saw the massive brown baking dish as Tom pulled it from the oven, caressing it with his massive oven mitts as he placed it on the counter. As Chat, I'd been able to appreciate every particular specialized note of the wondrous smell that would waft away as the lid was removed; the latent sense of smell I possessed as Adrien still made it quite the experience, but nothing could replace the first time I'd sat down for a proper meal with Marinette's family as Chat, able to experience Tom's cooking with my enhanced sense of taste. Thankfully, Tom had long gotten over being akumatized from that disastrous brunch that none of us ever talked about; oddly, as nice as he was with Adrien, he'd dropped more than a few hints that Marinette already had a boyfriend. I wondered a bit about how that final reveal might go, whenever that actually took place.

Trying hard not to sigh, I felt my patented Chat snark beginning to bubble over and tried to tamp it down; Marinette had been pretty clear I was to keep Lila occupied – at least, as clear as she could have been, given her every word had been monitored by Lila.

When the shoe fits, she had said.

Groaning inwardly, I tried not to think about that particular akuma, for it had been one in a long line of episodes where I'd had to play court jester in order to distract long enough for Ladybug to either figure out her Lucky Charm or to trundle off to get backup from Master Fu. In that particular case, I'd allowed myself to become captured by a cobbler Hawkmoth had tapped to take the Heroes of Paris on; by the time Ladybug had arrived to "rescue" me, she found a rather irate feline trussed up beneath a massive ten-ton steel-toed work boot poised to squash me into oblivion – an obvious Samaritan snare designed to get her to give up her earrings in order to save her partner.

The fact I could have Cataclysmed my way out of that mess had been lost on the akuma, something Ladybug had taken full advantage of. Eyeing Lila, I wondered if she'd made the same miscalculation, for though my ring hand might have been encased in the ice, I was reasonably certain I'd be able to use it as designed.

Except I couldn't, at least, not until Ladybug gave me her signal.

Without question, I knew Ladybug was free and had a plan; call it a bonus feline sense, or just an astute understanding of how our partnership worked, but whatever it was, it allowed me to continue the somewhat bored-looking façade I was providing to our nemesis while actually counting down to the inevitable triggering of the plan by my partner, my feline muscles tensing beneath the ice for the moment I could spring into action. Maybe it was good that my tail was encased in ice, for I was sure it would have been twitching in anticipation of finally sinking my claws into Lila. Had I been wearing them. Which I wasn't at the moment, since I'd been mere minutes earlier actually swimming in the water that was now rather solidly embracing me.

Some part of me was still following along with Lila's tirade – it was interesting how long she was willing to monologue, given what we knew about the Miraculous she seemed to have obtained; despite my bored expression (which I knew was driving her nuts), my feline ears were attuned for that particular chirping that would tell me a shift in her plans would be imminent. One way or the other, I'd be getting out of that ice.

Lila had just turned and started what was by my count the fifteenth pass over the bricked walkway when I felt the peculiar sensation of my baton buzzing against both the small of my back and the ice it was encased within. I tried to keep my face impassive, but inside, I recognized it for the sign it was.

Time for the next phase, I thought, unable to keep the grin from my face.

Unfortunately, Lila caught my change in expression and paused at a spot just in front of me. "Have I said something amusing, alley cat?"

"Hard to say," I said with somber seriousness. "To be honest, I never really know when you're lying, and when you're actually telling the truth. As far as I'm concerned, you probably aren't even remotely connected to Hawkmoth and are just using his disappearance as a way to fill the void yourself."

The expression on Lila's face went stony.

That was easier than I thought it would be.

"I mean, come on? Why would Hawkmoth choose you to be his backup plan? You're a teenager for crying out loud. What on earth would you be able to do to further his plans?"

"Age isn't everything," she fairly spat. "You're clearly not an adult, either."

"I'll take that as a compliment," I grinned. "I work awfully hard at it."

"It wasn't meant as praise."

"Says you," I chuckled. My baton buzzed again. "Look, why don't you level with me. What is this all really about? You don't really need Adrien Agreste. And you apparently don't even really need me."

Lila blinked. "Wha-? I've got you right now!"

"Yeah, whatever," I sighed, looking at my gloved fingers on my free paw and wishing I had my claws. "You've not done much with me either time I was under your control."

"I made you get those files for me!" she thundered. "And you're the bait to get Ladybug!"

"Like that is gonna work," I rolled my eyes. "You think you're the first one to try the old 'capture Chat' ploy?" I asked, before my grin widened. "Wow. You really do think Ladybug is about to appear and save my furry butt."

I tried hard to tamp down my pleasure at seeing the rage reflected on Lila's face, for I knew from my interactions with her as Adrien, what she hated more than anything was to be called out on, well, anything. I calculated she was close to needing to somehow prove to me her plan was going swimmingly, and put my final card on the table.

"You've got a lot to learn if you want to be the new Hawkmoth," I said as I looked away. "Frankly, I expected more from you. But that's okay. LB and I have been doing this longer than you have anyway."

"You think you have this all figured out, eh?"

My baton buzzed a final time and I smiled to myself before turning back to Lila. "I don't know," I replied. "Have I?"

"Not in the least!"

I threw my paw up in front of my face as she pointed both hands at me and blasted the ice away using a burst of white-hot energy, almost as if she'd channeled the sun itself. I was ready for it and leapt away from the debris, dropping my aqua-mode transformation as I sailed into the open space; it was an intentional mistake, for as the wave washed over me, I was momentarily blinded – just long enough for Lila to tackle me in mid-air. The two of us tumbled together and crashed upon the icy surface, skittering apart and away from each other, despite her attempt to gain some sort of purchase with her hands. For my part, I dug long grooves in the ice with the welcome return of my claws, arresting my movement and allowing me to leap away and onto the stony walkway rimming the space.

Staying on all fours, I burst into motion, hurling my feline body down the corridor as fast as I could. I didn't have to turn around to know Lila had taken up pursuit; instead, I focused on the tunnel, looking for telltale landmarks. As I'd told Spider-Man earlier, we'd spent an inordinate amount of time fighting akumas in the catacombs beneath Paris, enough that I knew them well enough to no longer need my baton's map. Careening around a corner, I used a claw to stay close to the wall and then leapt upward to the access point I'd been looking for; unsurprisingly, the cover was off, and I smiled to think at how well I had guessed what the plan was.

Grabbing the rung of the ladder, I glanced backwards to see Lila rounding the corner, fire in her eyes and, more importantly, about to pour forth from her fingertips. Tensing, I flung myself upward and into the open space of the Trocadero plaza, twisted in midair and hauled out my baton in a smooth movement so I could helicopter sideways and away from hole. Landing in a cat crouch, I flipped and watched Lila fly up and out herself, landing in the wide part of the plaza just a few meters from me.

"Pop goes the weasel," I smiled.

Whatever response she had planned died on her lips, for while her attention had been focused on me (intentionally, of course), Spidey had landed behind her and deftly cocooned her in a thick layer of his white webbing. The force knocked her sideways and onto her side, and she spluttered as she tipped over.

Ladybug landed beside the prone body, and I took that as my cue. One quick flip with a double twist and I was beside her in my patented cat crouch. I had a pithy pun ready to go when Spider-Man cocked his head at Ladybug.

"I thought you said the plan was to rescue Chat?" he asked her.

Glancing at me with a sly smile, my partner replied: "That was her plan – never mine. This kitty knows better than to get captured by a villain," she laughed as she reached down to scratch behind an ear. "Don't you?"

Whatever comeback I had was lost as I leaned into her touch and sighed. "I would never presume to dispute you."

"That's smart."

It was sort of fun ignoring Lila's howls of protest, but at length my partner reached down to yank an unassuming hairpin from Lila's hair. In the blink of an eye, the wave of detransformation washed over Lila; When the glow faded, Ladybug was eyeing a small yellow-and-black kwami.

"Well, hello there," I smiled at the nonplussed little god as I stood. "Who are you?"

"My name is Suzaku," the tiny kwami said, it's voice rather powerful despite its diminutive size. "=I am happy to be of service, but first… where am I?" It asked, eyes wide as it took in the Trocadero.

I looked at Ladybug. "You don't know?" she asked. "Didn't your holder tell you?"

"I was activated so quickly, there was no time to talk," it replied as it looked around. "I've been asleep for… well, a very long time as you humans think of it."

"You're in Paris, France," I said. "What is the last thing you remember?"

If it was possible, the tiny kwami shuddered; Lila was complaining, loudly, but all three of us were ignoring her in favor of the tiny god. "My last holder had renounced me and was in the process of hiding the Miraculous. The palace guards were coming to take her away… she wouldn't let me help…"

I looked at Ladybug again. "Where was this palace?"

"I think it was called… Versailles." Pain was in the tiny face of the kwami. "Do you know where the others are?"

"Other? Kwami?"

"Yes," it said, eyeing me more closely before flitting to Ladybug. "You two are obviously holders, though I don't know about you," it declared after flitting to Spider-Man before returning to me. "So you understand what I'm asking. Where are my three brethren? Do you have them? Are they with your Guardian?"

I turned to Ladybug. "Uh oh," I said, my masked eyes darting to Lila. "That might explain her powers. You don't suppose—"

My words were left hanging in the air as Lila murmured something under her breath; a fraction of a moment later, a massive whirlwind started around her, flinging the three of us to the far corners of the plaza. More importantly, it appeared to have shredded the webbing Spider-Man has spun around her in the process. I tried to flip up and leap toward Lila, but the wind knocked me back into a raised wall, momentarily stunning me. By the time I regained my senses, both the wind and Lila had vanished.

Ladybug knelt beside me. "You okay?"

"I was," I frowned. "I think we have a far bigger problem than we realized."

Ladybug swore in a most un-ladylike way. I had to admit, I kind of agreed with her.