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Chapter 11:
Humming softly Lightning just smiled as she took a book off the shelf. "What's that book about?" Vanille asked resting her head on Lightning's shoulder as she just smiled at her.
"It is a philosophy book. One where the writer is a nihilist, but it is just one of those moods I'm in." Lightning said with a smile as she gently wrapped Vanille in a one arm hug. "But the question is what is going up with you? You are a lot more affectionate than you normally are. And not that I dislike that. It is just we've been going out so long I do notice when you are having a bad series of days and that is exactly what this is feeling like." Lightning whispered as she could just hear Vanille sighing next to her. The type of sigh which always screamed that she knew the game was up.
"I'm just having some bad thoughts. Almost making me want to burn again. And before you say it I've already brought it up during group and to Yuna. Yuna just thinks it is stress but has also offered to check my medication in case my brain got used to it. Which I kind of hope it is just stress although I don't know what I have to be stressed about." Vanille spoke softly as she just reached down and happily took Lightning's hand. "I mean I've an amazing girlfriend who is teaching me how to read, she spoils me with letting me look at her hot body... and I haven't done anything stupid or self destructive in a long time and haven't burn myself intentionally in eight months. I'm still mad you told them on me but it was the right thing to do. I probably wouldn't have if you didn't give me that push."
"Vanille, you are my girlfriend. I'm going to push you to achieve everything you ever want... especially when you are going to harm yourself... those were first degree burns. Something that can be pretty nasty. If you are stressed though and you don't want to talk to the shrinks about it, I'd be a little offended if you didn't at least attempt to talk to me." Lightning complained as she started to lead Vanille down to a different aisle.
"Why do you have to be so supportive and hot and smart... and have the body I swear was chiselled out of fine marble? You've got to leave me something in this relationship to be good at." Vanille said as she gently placed her free hand onto Lightning's abs as she just hummed happily. "Seriously... you've got to leave me something besides just a drooling mess anytime you take your shirt off."
"Vanille, you are good at a lot of things. Mostly calling me on when I'm doing something stupid like letting my blood sugar dip to a dangerous level. Or when I'm ignoring something and just letting it fester underneath the surface. To put it simply you are the glue that keeps us together. Or at the very least you aren't something that is a question. You make a lot of things bearable here... plus I can't stress that if you weren't here I'd be even crazier because everyone would be wanting to hug me and I'd snap and attack someone. Then regret it and take it out on myself eventually. You keep all kinds of crazy in check by just being here. Not to say that if they want you to move to the north building you shouldn't avoid it. I'd still be here and would gladly still teach you how to read during visitations."
"Yeah but you are always super happy during those and I know I'd just to get to see you. That I don't think I'd actually learn anything... I mean it took us four months for you to teach me how to write the alphabet... still no idea why there needs to be two of them." Vanille complained as Lightning just chuckled at her. "What? Also can you read me that one book about the detective?"
"There are dozens of alphabets. I just taught you the two common ones. One that is commonly used on Gran Pulse and the other is what is commonly used on Cocoon. As for why there are so many, I couldn't tell you. I'm sure if you learn how to read enough you can find out yourself. Remember you constantly need goals that you set to achieve. It makes everything easier. Especially when it is achievable and quantifiable. At least that is my experience."
"So what you think I should search for why there are a bajillion alphabets? That seems cruel."
"Might interest you. Even if on the surface it seems boring or as you say cruel. I mean think about it. It would essentially be the study of ancient humans."
"Phrased like that it sounds awesome. Learning about alphabets to see why there are a lot sounds boring. Besides I still want to be one of those big paid animal doctors. That sounds awesome and something that I would be really good at with the only thing realistically holding me back is the lack of knowing how to read or write. That is something many distant Gran Pulse villages lack and they rely almost entirely on their animals. Like to plough the fields or protect the livestock or families... the elders always said if you wanted to kill a village you don't need to touch the people instead you just had to hurt their chocobos. And don't dodge my question... can you read me the book about the funny detective?" Vanille complained as she swung her head backwards and groaned as Lightning rolled her eyes.
"I'm looking for one of them. They are pretty popular books Vanille. You know I love reading you books. Especially because it is a nice day and it is our reading outside day. But it looks like they are all out. Of the main books. Just the short stories."
"Those are always fun. Now come on... our time is going to run out and then you'll have that phone call with Rosa and Serah and I really don't want you to give up halfway through a story. Especially one of the short stories... those are really good. Can you find the one about the silver fire horsey?" Vanille asked as Lightning stopped for a second before she looked at Vanille before shaking her head.
Snapping her fingers as she plucked a book off the shelf. "Took me a few seconds to get what you meant. Silver Blaze. Which I think is in this series." Lightning said as she just smiled at Vanille jumping happily. "Now you might want to go and wait at the door because this is going to take a few minutes to get processed and I do know how you tend to get crazy and impatient and last time threatened to set the librarian on fire."
"Shouldn't take twenty minutes to check out five books."
"Vanille. I don't need to check out this book."
"I'm going... I'm going... you don't need to hold me at ransom like that."
"That isn't what ransom means. The word you are looking for is extort if you want to use a fancy sounding word. It is more like a concerned demand." Lightning complained as Vanille had started to walk off.
'Remember when she didn't know what those words meant and would demand you or someone explaining them?'
"Yeah..." Lightning said as she placed the books onto the counter, a smile being present as she could see the relieved worker at the lack of Vanille. "I told her to wait by the door."
"Thank you... she is like a dog with a bone and at points actually scares me." The librarian spoke as he started to scan the books.
"Vanille is harmless. Her bark really is worse than her bite. At least towards other humans unless she wants to get into trouble." Lightning said as the librarian just chuckled. "I know I'm about the only non staff member that can find that fine line."
"Yeah and none of the Librarian staff can tell... it is more like five orderly and two maybe three doctors can tell along with the entire kitchen staff. Point is until a while back we never really dealt with her besides her wanting to look at and I quote 'pretty pictures'."
"When she means what she says she always leads with her left side after she goes from explosive to quiet really quick. Like at the drop of a hat quick. Which is almost never so you'd be fine in assuming she doesn't mean it." Lightning said with a smile as she accepted the books being handed towards her.
"Makes sense, but I can't take those chances."
Nodding her head gently, Lightning just felt her smile increase as she could see Vanille's expression brightening as she had started to walk towards her. Sight of that was enough to cause Lightning to almost skip towards her. Just holding back enough as she could see Vanille losing some internal struggle to see her rushing over to wrap Lightning in a hug.
"Couldn't wait. Come on... we are losing precious time." Vanille pleaded as she gripped Lightning's hand and giving it a gentle tug that just caused the pink haired teen to chuckle. It was such a simple pleasure but she knew to Vanille it was the greatest thing.
Just that simple joy was enough to cause Lightning to smile at the gesture that she just accepted with a slightly brighter smile as they just started to walk out of the library and towards Lightning's room where she could just drop off what wasn't going to be brought out with them to enjoy the weather and read.
"If you care to smoke a cigar in our rooms, colonel, I shall be happy to give you the details which might interest you." Lightning spoke before closing the book as she brushed some of the hair from Vanille's face as she started to spin around and just stare at the sky as she just let out a hum of approval at the situation.
"How long do you have left? Because judging by the sun I'd say you have like twenty minutes..." Vanille hummed out softly as Lightning just took a deep breath as she fell backwards to stare at the sky herself.
"Don't know. Maybe. You are often right when it comes to things like telling time by the sun. I kind of need a sundial... or a clock..." Lightning said as she just took a deep breath as she could see Vanille begrudgingly sitting up as she offered a hand down to help Lightning up.
"Then you should probably get in there again. Because I'd rather if you didn't miss that call. Because I know you'll be feeling a lot better after it. Especially because if you don't get that sorted out you are going to be hounded by Rosa and not in the fun way like I've been hounding her to just give us that joint room." Vanille said as Lightning accepted the hand and began to pull herself up. "And don't give me that speech about how I should give up on it. I refuse to do so until they give in."
"Not that I don't enjoy the fact I have someone fighting for me now days... especially someone that understands the kind of shit I went through... at least enough to not try and force me to do anything I don't want to... namely talking about stuff... it is just that you do know if you push them far enough they won't be as accepting of us." Lightning said as she took a deep breath as Vanille rolled her eyes. "I'm being serious Vanille. Just relax for a few days and don't ask them. Think about how that might just be what you need to get them to see it your way."
"That makes literally zero sense. At least to me. But yeah you should go. I'll go check to see if Lann or Reynn want to join us for dinner. Or if they want to continue that game they were teaching me. Just so I can win. I refuse to lose. Especially because when I'm in group I get to gloat and it won't be considered rude. A bit mean yeah but not rude." Vanille said as she jumped happily in her place as Lightning just snickered as they started to walk towards the building.
"It is a little rude if all you do is gloat when you beat people in games. And if memory serves me, you are yet to beat me in table tennis. And you owe me something you called a 'happy ending' because of it... and I've still no idea what that is." Lightning said as Vanille swung her head backwards.
"Not going to lie, I've no idea what that is. I've just heard Fang make that bet with some women and she always won after sucking hard so I thought it would work for me." Vanille said with a small chuckle as Lightning just started to walk into the building. "And I know that chuckle... you are going to lecture me on using words or sayings I don't understand... but that wasn't the point of it. All I know is Fang stopped sucking when she made bets like that with women and a few girly men and was super happy the next day." Vanille said as Lightning just sighed as she pulled Vanille close to her.
"At points I forget how innocent you really are, and it makes me feel all kinds of guilty for telling you stories of people being cruel towards others."
"I dislike that at points too... but then I remember that is just you. And kind of how you let me know that you are trying to open up but don't really trust yourself to be one hundred percent honest with yourself. So it is something that is quickly forgiven. Plus I know you tell me things you don't even tell the shrinks or your sister so that just makes me feel really special. Like your emotions besides 'I'm terrified of the ghosts in my past' and 'I'm angry at everyone but Vanille and maybe Serah'. So I get happy about those types of things."
"I tend to tell everyone everything eventually. Just I come to you first with all my crap. And I'd show Serah my emotions if she didn't pick on me for having them so god damn often. I mean if I so much as blush for one second around her she latches onto that and tells everyone and acts like it is ground breaking news that should make the world stop." Lightning said as they came to a stop by the elevators.
"I can see the joy behind that... I mean I seldom see you blush and it looks so cute." Vanille said as the doors opened and they walked inside as the doors closed Vanille quickly looked around. "Why am I in here? I was meant to be on that floor... I blame you and your super hot body. Should be illegal to have a body that hot."
"Yeah but you know my family doesn't care about what is and isn't legal." Lightning said with a snicker as she could see Vanille just blushing as she pulled Lightning closer before leaning up to plant a chaste kiss on her lips as the doors started to open. "Regardless I hope everything goes by just fine for you. If you end up in solitary again I'm going to be super mad at you. Unless it was you smashing two heads together because they tried to get my racket of hugging you on my terms." Vanille said as Lightning chuckled and walked out.
"I know you too well to know that you wont be if I am. You'll maybe get me some water and water that down with more water." Lightning said as she heard a raspberry being blown at her from Vanille. Smiling as she walked towards Rosa's office.
She knew that it was going to be a little hilarious from her perspective of just trying to get Serah to see reason. Something that was beyond difficult on a good day. But this just had an air about it that to Lightning it screamed that it was going to be beyond impossible. To the point that it was actually a little nerve racking to her.
Knocking on the door, Lightning just smiled faintly as she could hear Rosa moving behind it. It meant that her day would nearly be over and once that was achieved and then the headache that is dealing with her sister latching onto something would be off of her plate for good.
'Serah means well she is just lost how to show you that she cares about you. She does mean well thought and I think you know that already.'
"What happened to you knew more about me than I know about me?"
'Those days have long since gone Light. The only things I maintain up here any more is what to say to cheer you up, and the memories you made me promise a long long time ago to never let you experience again. And I intend to only ever let you know of the things to cheer you up when you start to do that self destructive spiral you are prone to do.'
Seeing the door open, Lightning just sighed simply as the doors opened. "I've no idea what you think you can accomplish Lightning. I do have your family's number." Rosa said as she gestured for Lightning to walk in.
"You've the numbers that can only really get to my mother or ones that are already kind of public. Not the personal office number or the phone numbers that will get the maids or the butler to answer and that will get to Serah a lot quicker than my mother requesting an audience."
"Okay that explains a lot... thanks for the help."
Author's Note:
here we have yet another chapter.