Chapter 13 – The same med bay, Ben's room

A/N: This is it – the last chapter! I want to thank everyone who left a review or followed this story. It means a lot to me. Getting back into my writing is one of my goals for 2021, and the response to this story has definitely helped. So, thank you!

Also, as a warning, this last chapter is achingly sweet. Like, super-floofy. If that's not your thing, you might want to move along, but I'm suspecting that all of you Reylo shippers are waiting for something like this! Thanks again and MTFBWY!

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Ben was drifting in and out of sleep when he next heard the door to his room open. Still too groggy to be really alert, he slowly opened his eyes and felt his breath catch in his throat. Silhouetted in the doorway, light from the hallway shining behind her, was Rey. She was wearing hospital-issued pajamas, like he was, and her hair was unkempt, hanging down around her shoulders. But she was smiling and it was the most beautiful sight he'd ever seen.

"Rey," he breathed.

She paused with her hand still on the door, looking uncertain. "Is it all right if I come in?"

He nodded, doing his best to shift himself into more of a sitting position. "Of course."

She entered then and came to stand by his side. He met her curious gaze, watching as her eyes intently studied him, flitting over his face and down his body before returning back to meet his gaze. She blushed then, a delightful pink color flushing her cheeks and Ben couldn't help but grin. "Sit down," he said softly, patting the bed beside him. "Please."

Gingerly, Rey took a seat, using just the smallest sliver of the bed to perch herself on. She still looked uncomfortable, as though a wrong move or a loud noise might send her scurrying from the room. Tentatively, Ben reached out for their bond and felt a very strong, very impenetrable wall meet him from Rey's side. Hmm, that was new.

"How are you feeling?" he finally asked. He had done his own quick perusal of her injuries and while she appeared to be better, he could tell that some of her hesitant movement was due to lingering aches and pains.

"Much better, thank you." Subconsciously, she placed a hand on her side, drawing Ben's attention there. He could barely make out some type of bulk through her shirt. "Still waiting for my ribs to fully heal, but otherwise, the doctor assures me I'm fine. Although still dehydrated apparently. I've never had to pee so much in my life," she lamented and Ben couldn't help but let out a short bark of a laugh.

Her eyes flew to his. As soon as she saw the mirth in his expression, she couldn't help smiling as well.

"How are you?" she finally asked, taking a moment to once again closely study his face.

Ben shrugged slightly. "I'll be fine. Nothing a week in a bacta tank couldn't cure, apparently."

Surprising him, she took his hand in one swift motion. Holding on tight, she drew it up to her chest and pressed it against her breastbone. He could faintly feel her heartbeat pulsing against his palm. "You almost died, Ben. I thought you … I thought you might have sacrificed yourself for me."

Her plaintive expression cut to the core of him. "It would have been a worthy sacrifice," he assured her.

"I don't want us dying for each other," she said softly, a tear streaking down her cheek as she lowered her head and brushed her lips against his knuckles. "I don't … I don't know what I would have done if …"

She broke off on a strangled sob as her emotions appeared to finally overwhelm her. Doing his best to sit up, Ben reached for her with his free hand, cradling her cheek in his palm. She nuzzled her nose into his skin and he almost whimpered at the feeling. How was it possible to feel so much for one person? His body felt as if it might burst from the effort to contain everything he was feeling in this moment.

"Hey, hey," he cooed, wiping away a few tears. "It's okay. We both made it. We're both still here."

She nodded once, but it didn't stop her tears. Shifting again, Ben managed to get just a bit closer and this time, he encircled Rey's shoulders with his arm, drawing her closer to him. She pressed her forehead against his shoulder, letting out shuddering breaths as she worked to get her emotions under control.

Ben pressed his face into her hair, placing a kiss there. He would do anything to take Rey's pain away, whether it was physical, mental, spiritual or emotional. But he also knew that sometimes healing simply came with time and patience.

He never would have thought he'd be capable of the latter, but now that he'd been given an overabundance of the former, maybe he could figure out how to just breathe and be.

Ben waited until Rey's crying had quieted, before he slowly pulled back to meet her gaze. Even with red-rimmed eyes and a snotty nose, she was still the prettiest girl he'd ever met.

"Better?" he asked, taking the end of his sleeve and wiping it gently along her cheeks.

She nodded sheepishly. "I came here to see how you were doing, not to have a total breakdown."

"Considering everything that's happened, I think maybe we can just take things as they come, huh?"

She smiled softly and then nodded. An uncomfortable silence once again filled the room, and Ben had no idea how to break it. How was he supposed to ask the girl he loved if she loved him back? While he may be inexperienced in relationships, even his rudimentary interpersonal skills told him now was not the time to confess his undying love. There were still too many variables on the table – and still too much to process.

"Lando said we can stay as long as we need," she finally said. His eyes flew back to her face trying to interpret her feelings on the idea. Did she want to be stuck here with him, wherever here was? Or was she simply waiting until she was well enough before returning back to the Resistance. "He promised me we'd be safe."

"You can trust him," Ben assured. Sitting up slightly, he winced at the pain in his back and Rey must have caught the expression.

She rose swiftly, stepping away from the bed as he readjusted his body against his pillows. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be bothering you. You still have so much healing to do. You need to rest."

Without a second glance, she all but ran for the door. Ben was barely able to get out, "Rey, wait!" before her hand was on the knob. His request did stop her, thank the maker, and he took a deep breath as he considered what he could possibly say to make her stay. After a minute, he decided on the truth. "Please don't go."

He watched as her shoulders rose and fell with a deep inhale and exhale, watched as she straightened and slowly took one step and then two away from the door, before turning back to face him. The silent plea in her gaze made his heart hurt. "I don't know what to do," she whispered.

Taking a deep breath, Ben waited a beat and then said, "What do you want to do?"

Shifting on her feet, she started to fidget, her fingers twisting the hem on her nightshirt. She looked everywhere in the room, but at him and he tried one more time to bridge their bond through the Force. Once more, he was stymied by a formidable wall. At last, she bit her lip, lowered her eyes to the floor and said quietly, "I want to stay."

Ben released a heavy breath, grateful beyond belief that it was her inclination to stay with him and not run. Sitting up once more and readjusting his pillows, Ben reached out a hand to her and offered, "Then please stay. That's what I want too."

Nodding once, Rey approached the side of the bed again and took his hand, squeezing it softly. And then she surprised him completely. She toed off her shoes and climbed up onto the mattress with him, fitting her body along his side, nestling her head under his chin. His arm naturally fell to her shoulder and he drew little circles into her skin as she got situated.

"Is this okay? I'm not hurting you, am I?" While he knew she would move if he told her yes, the last thing Ben wanted was more awkward space between him and Rey.

Shaking his head, Ben pressed a kiss to her forehead and said, "This is the best I've felt since I woke up."

He thought he felt her smile against his chest as she sank further into his side and got more comfortable. With her warm weight beside him, and her arm draped gently across his abdomen Ben was certain he was experiencing some type of euphoria. He'd never been close to anyone like this. Not since he was a boy had he been held, and there was very little need or want for intimacy within the First Order. He almost laughed aloud at the thought of giving Hux a hug.

But in this moment, he felt peace. Rey was safe, breathing steadily against his side, and his body was on the mend. All of the other complications could wait. He was going to enjoy this, for however long it lasted.

Ben was tempted to drift off, but he knew that if he didn't at least address the dyad with Rey than it would just be harder to try later. Speaking softly so as not to scare her, he asked, "Rey?"

"Hmm?" It almost sounded as if she was asleep, but he could feel the tension throughout her body. She wasn't as relaxed as she seemed.

"Why have you closed off the bond?"

He felt her start, and Ben squeezed her shoulder, encouraging her to stay with him and not run as she had attempted to do before. "I'm not upset. I just want to know why. You know that we can't hide from it forever."

She sighed heavily and then gave a slight nod. "I know."

More silence, and Ben did his best to wait her out. He knew Rey would talk to him, he just had to be patient. There was that word again. It felt like a cosmic joke that he, the son of Leia Organa and Han Solo was being forced to exercise patience.

"I …" She tried to start and then paused, obviously still puzzling out what to say. "I closed it off because I'm confused and scared and sad and happy and anxious and shy and I just didn't want to be projecting all of that to you through the bond. My head is a mess right now."

Ben snorted softly. "Join the club, sweetheart."

"I'm serious," she told him, and this time she did lift her head to meet his gaze. He could see the truth there, the way every emotion she felt flitted through her eyes and across her face. She had the most expressive face of anyone he'd ever met, he was pretty sure. "I don't know how to process any of what's happened and I didn't want all of my confusion and fear to impact you."

Smiling softly, Ben lifted his free hand and pushed an errant strand of hair behind her ear, taking a moment to let his touch linger against her skin. She closed her eyes at the touch and then just as quickly opened them again, as if she was embarrassed to react that way.

"Rey, I realize this might be hard for you to believe since I am such a paragon of stability and so unbelievably well-adjusted," he said grandly, waiting for her to smile so he'd know she was in on the joke. After she grinned, he continued. "But I'm feeling everything you are too. And I don't have any idea how to make sense of it.

"But maybe our connection, the dyad might help. It's been a strength up until now, I don't know why that would change."

She searched his eyes for something and he hoped to the Force she found it. He watched as she processed his words, watched as she reflected on them in silence, and then watched as she slowly lowered her head back to his chest. "Okay."

In a rush, their bond was alive again, awash in all the emotions they had just discussed, and Ben felt Rey's uncertainty joining his own, felt how confused she was as her mind cycled through the events of the past month over and over again. He inhaled sharply, as he caught a glimpse of himself inside her mind, standing beside her in front of Palpatine. In Rey's mind, he looked strong and solid, like he could take on any challenge and defeat it. He felt Rey's joy at the sight of the two of them working together, allowing their Force energy to flow freely, and how it suffused them with peace and happiness, even as Palpatine threw them about like rag dolls. Everything was just a little bit better when they were together. Ben could see that clearly.

And he felt the same. He took a moment to reflect on how Rey had seemed when he'd found her in that chamber, standing proud and strong against the grotesque husk of the Emperor. How radiant she had appeared as she and Ben faced the monster head-on. It had been astounding and left him as breathless now as it had then.

Sitting up again, Rey breathed, "Is that really how you see me?"

Swallowing thickly, Ben figured that if he wanted Rey to trust him and allow their bond to work, then he had to do the same. "Yes. Strong and courageous and capable." He traced a finger along the skin of her arm, watching as it traveled up over her shoulder and neck and finally came to circle the shell of her ear before his hand cupped the back of her neck, his fingers working their way into her hair and rubbing gently at her scalp. "And so beautiful."

He watched Rey closely the whole time, wanting to make sure he wasn't making her uncomfortable. He watched as goosebumps raised along her skin and heard as she released a shuddering sigh once his hand came to rest against her. Her eyes were closed as she seemed to sink into the feeling of him touching her, enjoying the slight movement of his fingers as they gently massaged her scalp. If this was how she reacted to his touch, he would never stop wanting to touch her.

"I wanted to give up," she said softly, her eyes still closed, chin tilted down. "I almost had given up. I didn't think there was any way I could go against Palpatine's power. He was so strong."

Releasing a sigh, she opened her eyes, liquid pools of hazel and gold regarding him with innocence and honesty. "But then, you came for me. And I knew together we could do it. I knew we would find a way."

Shaking his head slowly, Ben gave her a small smile. "I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but all I did was get pitched off the edge of a cliff." She smiled back. "You are the one who did it, Rey. You saved me, you saved us all."

With a swift shake of her head, Rey sat up straighter, dislodging Ben's hand from her hair. He let it fall to his lap, watching closely as she struggled with what to say next. "I don't want to be anyone's savior," she admitted in a harsh whisper.

Frowning, Ben placed his hand over hers and asked, "Why?"

"It's too much. I'm an orphaned girl from Jakku with a monster of a biological grandfather and the weight of the entire galaxy resting on me. I'm not strong enough to handle all of that. How could anyone?"

Ben could feel how frantic she was becoming. He could almost see her nerves fraying, as she struggled to comprehend everything that had happened. Less than a year ago, she was a scavenger on Jakku, fighting to survive. Now, she was The Last Jedi.

"I know a little something about expectations and monstrous familial connections," Ben told her, grateful when he managed to elicit a small smile. "But, I'm going to remind you of something right now and I want you to hear me, really hear me."

He took her gently, by the shoulders, waiting until she lifted her head to meet his gaze once more. "What?" she asked.

"You're not alone."

A hiccup of a sob escaped her before she had the chance to stop it. Placing her hand against his cheek, she told him with tears in her eyes, "Neither are you."

He felt his own eyes welling with tears as he watched her struggle to get her emotions under control. "Then something tells me, we're going to be okay."

She nodded once before moving swiftly and throwing her arms around his shoulders. He returned her embrace, helping to adjust her so she was in a more comfortable position, her legs draped across his lap, as he cradled her trembling body against his, one hand cupping the back of her head, the other tight around her back.

It could have been minutes or hours that they stayed like that. Eventually, Rey's tears were all dried up, as were Ben's and she again nestled herself against his chest, her forehead resting under his chin as she traced patterns over his chest with the lightest of touches. It drove him crazy and soothed him all at the same time.

"What happens next?" she finally asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Ben shrugged gently. "Whatever we want."

Lifting her eyes to his, she swallowed thickly and then said, "I want to stay with you. I don't exactly know what is happening between us. I've never been this close to anyone before, but …" Her cheeks flushed as she seemed to lose her nerve. He watched as her nervous habit of fiddling with the hem of her shirt returned with a vengeance.

"But what?" he asked quietly, holding his own breath at what she might say. Was it at all possible he really was going to get a second chance and that Rey would be a part of it? Was it possible that his parents had actually been right?

Taking a deep breath, she seemed to steal herself and then once again lifted her eyes to his. "But I think I love you. I think that's what this is and I don't want to be anywhere you aren't."

Ben inhaled sharply and before his could even register his actions, he leaned forward and placed his lips against Rey's, kissing her and doing his best to convey his own feelings. She seemed startled at first and he was about to pull away, realizing he had pretty much just attacked her, but then her hands were cupping his cheeks and redirecting his mouth to slant over hers just so, and there. They fit.

It was a heady few moments of lips and tongue and teeth and tiny gasps of pleasure that left Ben feeling as though he had somehow left his body behind to float above it all and watch this glorious moment between he and Rey from afar. But then he'd feel her fingers thread through his hair, feel just the slightest bite of her teeth against his lip, inhale her scent and he knew he was very much grounded in the moment.

Finally, they pulled back, both gasping for air, lips swollen and shiny from kissing. Ben was grateful to see a similarly dazed expression on Rey's face. He was having a hard time stringing two thoughts together at the moment.

Rey studied him closely, obviously looking for something. Scrambling, Ben finally blurted out, "You're it for me, Rey. I know that. As assuredly as I know that my name is Ben Solo or that Chewie smells like a wet dog after a rainstorm or that the Falcon's environmental controls will blow once the ship has been in hyperspace for 63 minutes—"

"Not anymore," she interjected, allowing a smile to cross her face. "I fixed it."

"Of course, you did," he said quietly, feeling the stupidest and widest grin he'd ever sported almost split his face in two. "Whatever comes next, we're going to figure out together. Okay?"

She studied him closely once more, but unlike a few minutes ago, her expression was bright and open. With wide eyes and a smile, she leaned forward and kissed him gently, before resuming her comfortable position, nestled against the top of his chest. "Okay," she said on a sigh.

Closing his eyes, Ben exhaled slowly and felt the same peace from moments before wash over him. He felt something similar from Rey's side of the bond and thought that maybe now, for the first time in his life, he might finally have found a worthy cause to devote his time and attention to.

Loving Rey.