This was supposed to be a short chapter.
It isn't.
On an unrelated note, I was going to write some shipping, but then Bianca happened and I wanted Touko to reflect on her actions some more (btw – what did you guys think about Lil being let go off?) and having them flirt up a storm didn't fit this chapter's mood. Which they still kind of did in the last scene? Honestly, I'm just glad to be finally done with this and I hope you enjoy the chapter ^^ (also, I realized this story has passed it's one year anniversary already, which is pretty nice ^^)
But regardless. That's enough of me for now – here's chapter 14 ^^ Enjoy ^^
Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon and this entire story is inspired by the excellent oneshot "The truth will prevail" by maydei – you should definitely read it! And then leave a favorite! Because it's amazing!
Too little colours to describe the world
Chapter 14
Grey skies
.
.o.O.o.
.
|Have a nice day and ttly?
It was the last text Touko had sent him. It had been a few days ago and while he had told Zorua he'd text her back, he had yet to do so.
But he just didn't know where to start. And everyone was telling him to do different things and he still had to talk to Touko, because regardless of what his father said, regardless of what the grunts had said, he just couldn't believe she'd be that...that evil!
He just couldn't.
But he didn't text her back either because his father had told him time and time again that humans were manipulative.
And whenever he thought about blocking her, he remembered Concordia telling him that everyone deserved a second chance.
N just hoped Touko regretted her actions. He really, really did.
.
.o.O.o.
.
When Touko had let go off Lil, she had felt terrible. She had looked into the Herdier's eyes, shining with warmth and she had felt like she had just stabbed it, because she was saying good-bye and Lil probably didn't even understand. But she had-she had believed that would be it. After all, Herdier was with Professor Juniper now – and she'd be free – one less decision weighing her down.
But Touko had been wrong.
She had been oh so wrong. Because there were too many empty spaces now.
X
Life – life sucked. Maybe it was the weather, maybe it was the difficulties Touko had with training Rockstar and Wobuff, maybe it was because Arceus knew what reason.
But it didn't matter, because Touko was a trainer and she wouldn't let a passing low affect her too greatly. So what if she was feeling miserable? She could always distract herself – and what better way was there to let off steam than by having a nice, old-fashioned Pokémon battle?
So, when Touko grabbed a Pokéball – her opponent had sent out a Patrat, which meant Ollie was out of the question – and she realized the ball was gone, she panicked, because her Pokémon had been stolen.
Until she realized it hadn't been stolen at all. And that the ball was gone because Lil was gone, and Touko realized not everything could be fixed with a battle.
And sometimes, it wasn't the weather that made you feel miserable.
X
She had won that battle – luckily – because even if she didn't have Lil and Ollie was still too scared to battle Patrat's, she still had Emblitz, who, for some reason, had become less of an obstacle the past few days.
It was something.
It didn't change the fact that things were missing though. Touko tried to ignore it, tried not to notice anger in Ollie's eyes or the confusion in Rockstar's and Wobuff's and she powered on, trying to forget, because, after all, everyone did that. She wasn't the first trainer to let go off a Pokémon.
She wouldn't be the last either.
It didn't make it any easier though.
X
The Pokémart was almost completely abandoned. Safe for the cashier, playing a game on his VisoCaster and a few teens snickering in one of the corners, Touko was completely alone in her team. It was raining outside and a Sunday. Most people were at home, having dinner with their families.
Touko dreaded having to venture outside again. She dreaded having to find a somewhat dry spot to set up her tent and she dreaded the moment once she reached a town where she'd have to clean it again.
But none of that was really a concern to her. Because right now, all she could think of was dinner. She had had a somewhat meager breakfast this morning and after that – her thoughts had been occupied.
Making her way through the many aisles of the supermarket – potions? No. Held items? No. Emergency stuff? No – until she found the things she was looking for. She wasn't in the mood to cook tonight, so she could simply open one of the packages of instant noddles she had stocked up on earlier. But she wanted her team to cheer up and she had just won a battle, so maybe a nice dinner with some gourmet food would make all of this more bearable?
It was when Touko was juggling four cans of Pokémon food already, wondering how the heck had she ever managed to balance five of them at once, that she got punched in the gut once more.
She didn't have to juggle five cans of Pokémon food. Lil was gone after all.
X
And now – now after all that had happened and she was lying in bed, finally, Touko still couldn't let go of the look of loyalty and love in Lil's eyes. Couldn't forget how, sometimes, il would have gotten out of her Pokéball and would have snuggled up to her, enticing Touko to scratch the Lilipup's ears.
She couldn't help but wonder if it'd feel any different if she were scratching a Herdier's instead.
.
.o.O.o.
.
Soft Wave's nose twitched as she got closer to this other Pokémon. She had seen her kind before – Juniper had studied them time and time again – and she had never particularly disliked them. They were weird and usually too happy, but at least they weren't Patrat.
So, Soft Wave carefully sniffed the air and got closer while trainer was doing – well, whatever that dumb human was doing – until she wasn't able to get any closer anymore, because that would mean to stop hiding behind the rock.
And Soft Wave had no intention of leaving her hiding spot.
She didn't need to, though, as the Lillipup was, well, a Lillipup and had sniffed out that weird like water-smelling other Pokémon.
And when she had found her, she was overjoyed!
"Friend?", she asked, before coming closer – Soft Wave kept stepping back, sweating profusely, until she was backed into a corner – she would not enter the tall grass. By all the shells, who knew what one could find there!
Though, that Lillipup was getting closer and closer and-and then she licked her nose, before running around wildly, happily exclaiming:"Friend! Friend! Lets play!"
And then she had already run off leaving Soft Wave to wonder what to make of that first encounter.
It-It hadn't been a bad one, right?
. O .
Training with that new teammate was...it was fun.
A lot of fun.
"Come, come, Wave! Trainer is letting us train!"
Soft Wave frowned at that. Well. It would be fun, but somehow – why was Furball always only outside for training? And why didn't Furball mind?
"Trainer's nice. Trainer lets me be part of her team! I always wanted to be part of a team?"
Well. Soft Wave couldn't argue with that. Even if she disagreed.
. O .
"Do you think trainer well let us sleep next to her?"
"Huh?"
"I was allowed outside today. Without training!"
Furball really shouldn't be so excited about that. But she was and that night, they were all sleeping sprawled across the bed and maybe, whatever trainer – maybe not entirely so stupid trainer – had been worried with, wasn't a problem anymore.
Falling asleep next to Furball almost felt like cuddling up with Fireball and Green Parade and Soft Wave loved it.
. O .
"Look! Wave! Look!"
Soft Wave did in fact look. Furball liked sniffing out new stuff ever since she had learned that new move.
"What's that?"
"A stick?"
"...a stick?"
Soft Wave cocked her head. It was a stick. A fairly ordinary stick. She had observed other Lillipup's running after sticks that were thrown, did Furball expect her to..?
"Good smelling stick!"
"Good smelling?"
Ollie sniffed the stick. Well. It smelled like a stick. Nothing special.
"Good smelling. Smells like grandma."
Oh. Ollie sniffed again. Still, nothing special. Her nose was probably too bad for it.
"Like grandma? You miss her?"
She knew she missed Juniper and Fireball and Green Parade and she wished she wouldn't need to be here. But she had to be and it sucked. Even if that Touko girl wasn't half bad.
"Sometimes. But I'm glad trainer let me stay. I like trainer."
Well. Soft Wave liked trainer too. She was a weird human, but she was nice. Sometimes. Tried to be, anyway.
"How did she mark that stick?", Soft Wave asked, sniffing it again, still not finding anything special about it. She looked up again, watching Lil smile happily.
"Well..."
And then-then Furball peed on the stick. The stick, Soft Wave had sniffed. Not five minutes earlier. Her lips started trembling.
"F-F-FURBALL!"
. O .
"I was scared during that fight."
"Me too."
"Do you think trainer will make us fight again?"
"...Yes."
"Then I will get stronger!"
. O .
"Chestnut is weird", Soft Wave thought as she watched him glare at Touko. She hadn't meant to think it out loud – but she had.
"He is", Furball agreed, sitting down next to her and watching their trainer try – and fail – to train the Pansear. And it was enough encouragement for Soft Wave to cross her arms and huff out:"He is always mean to trainer."
Furball thought of a smirk in response.
"I thought you didn't like trainer?"
She thought about another smirk. Soft Wave huffed once more.
"I-I like her. But trainer is weird!"
"I like trainer too. Trainer is nice. Love her."
Another huff. Soft Wave turned away from Furball a bit, watching that Touko girl once more.
"Roasted Chestnut is weirder."
"Yep. Yep he is!"
. O .
"Trainer-Trainer doesn't love me?"
"Trainer does! Chestnut is stupid!"
"But trainer didn't let me fight! Trainer thinks – she thinks I'm weak!"
Furball was looking at her from watery eyes and Soft Wave wished she could glare at Touko right now, but, of course, that girl was gone.
"Trainer loves you. I know. You know. Chestnust doesn't know anything."
. O .
"Trainer doesn't think I'm weak!"
"No, she doesn't."
"Trainer thinks I'm strong!"
"Yes, she does."
"Do-Do you-do you think trainer would like me more if I evolve?"
Soft Wave frowned.
"You want to evolve just for trainer?"
"Yes!"
. O .
"Furball?", Soft Wave asked, as she looked around their campsite. She could see their entire team – it was almost time for lunch – but she couldn't see Furball. And Furball was trainer's second favorite!
But Furball didn't show up that lunch. And neither did she show up that dinner. Or for training. Or when they fell asleep that night – only her and trainer, because the other three weren't well-behaved enough.
. O .
"Ollie, could you come and sit with us?"
Trainer's voice sounded soft and sad and she deserved it. Because she didn't want to sit with her and stupid Roasted Chestnut and even stupider Big Heart and Fair Wing – even if Fair Wing was nice enough.
Dinner wasn't the same without Furball. And Furball – Furball was gone, because trainer – trainer was terrible.
.
.o.O.o.
.
Their home was quiet. That day. OF course, one could hear leaves rustling in the wind, of course one could hear their own steps, muffled by moss. But the forest – it was quiet. Not a single bird was singing and his family was hiding out, because silent birds were a bad sign.
If the Pidove went quiet, a human was on the hunt and Roasted Chestnut did not want to join them.
Neither did his family.
Chestnut had seen plenty of Pokémon get close to humans on purpose, of course. It was a risk to take – if one only got attacked, you risked fainting, which wasn't a fun experience, but if you wanted to become part of a trainer's team it was the only way. But Roasted Chestnut didn't want to join anyone. He was happy right here, where he was.
And then the human came. And saw his family and Chestnut – Chestnut had always been the slowest of his siblings.
And when he let out a scream as the weird light engulfed in and he was sucked into that weird thing, he could see them stare at him with wide eyes.
He had never wanted to join a trainer's team, but the human – the human hadn't cared.
. O .
It-It could have been worse, Roasted Chestnut realized one day. It could have been so much worse.
Training was when it was worst. Training and the lonely nights he lay awake, starring at the forest.
Training, because it hurt sometimes and he didn't really like fighting. And the lonely nights because he missed his family and the forest he had grown up in and even that stupid tree he had always bumped his head against.
He missed it so much.
But it was bearable. He wanted to go back, go back home, but it was bearable. He could feel the soft moss underneath his feet and he could breathe in the air and he still felt free, because he may be in company of a human, but he was also in company of other Pokémon and they understood.
They understood. And listened. And cared.
And then, not a week later, when he was let out of his Pokéball again, he didn't look at a battlefield or at the rest of the team, but in the blue eyes of a human girl who squealed.
The world didn't smell like wet grass and fresh water anymore, but like humans and like things he didn't know and then – she hugged him. The girl. Pressed him too close to her chest and when he hissed, he got scolded.
And somehow, Chestnut couldn't help but feel betrayed because he had been hugged before. But this-this didn't feel right and why did he have to be here?!
. O .
Chestnut stopped liking humans. They were scary. They were mean. They didn't care.
He started missing his family more than he had done before so. Started missing the world outside, because he barely ever left, and started missing everything he had been used to.
He tried to find fun things to do. But whenever he did, he was scolded or punished and it felt as if he were a puppet.
At night, he didn't have the forest to look at anymore, reminding him of better times and it was scary. He could still remember his family, but sometimes he wondered, whether he'd be able to keep them close enough to stay with him even if he ever lost his mind.
And then the training started. At first, Chestnut had looked forward to it. Had wanted nothing more than to get outside, but the training – it wasn't right! It wasn't fun! It was him and the girl and he could see the trees and he wanted to go back home.
He missed home. He missed home so much.
. O .
When he was called out of his Pokéball again, he looked into blue eyes, but those belonged to an older human girl who smelled differently, too. There was an Oshawott, called "Soft Wave", who told him she didn't like him "because all Fire types are untrustworthy, except for maybe Fireball" and there was a Lillipup called "Furball" who liked that trainer way too much.
He didn't like them. Either of them. He told them that much.
They didn't like them either. And that – that was his new team.
His new family.
. O .
Chestnut still didn't like training. He still hated fighting. But he didn't want to get scolded anymore and...it was more fun this time. Less intense. The trainer seemed young and happy all the time and sometimes it was almost fun.
When Soft Wave shot a Water Gun at their trainer and she cursed, because at least the girl was clever enough to know that water sucked.
When Furball got super excited about something as normal as dinner (which, Chestnut supposed, wasn't normal at all, and rather a luxury, but still).
The food tasted worse than the food he had gotten at home of from the other humans, but he was gratified whenever he saw that girl take a bite of her own food and grimaced.
He supposed it could be worse.
But he still lay awake at night wanting to go home.
. O .
He tried to run one night. He didn't get far – Furball woke up and, in turn, woke trainer. And when he was caught, she got mad and after that, she didn't let him sleep outside ever again.
. O .
Chestnut started hating Soft Wave. They constantly fought. He knew Furball didn't like him either, but they were civil enough. But Soft Wave – Soft Wave had never know what it was like to be truly free. Soft Wave was human born.
It was disgusting.
. O .
They fought. Soft Wave and he. Trainer didn't notice, but Furball did and she talked to them.
It didn't make things better.
Roasted Chestnut felt miserable. But that night, Furball cuddled up to him, telling him she still didn't like him.
She didn't leave though.
. O .
Furball – Furball was annoying. Loud. Too happy and too nice to trainer.
But Furball deserved to evolve – because that's what she wanted. Because she wanted to become stronger. For that human.
And that human hadn't cherished that.
. O .
Trainer tried to talk to him alone. But she hugged him too tightly and she scratched them and that evening, she tried to talk to him again. And to Soft Wave.
It wasn't fun. But it reminded him a bit of his mother and that made him feel better.
. O .
There were two new Pokémon afther that day in the cave. They were called Big Heart, a Roggenrola, and Nosy, a Woobat.
He didn't like Big Heart. He was annoying and mean and Chestnut didn't know why anyone would call him "Big Heart". But Nosy seemed ok. She was curious and didn't think too much of trainer and while she told him she had wanted to be caught (or, well, hadn't minded to be caught), she seemed nice enough.
Maybe Nosy could become his friend, he though. Maybe things weren't so bad after all.
. O .
That human talked to him again and this time, she wasn't scolding him. Training. She was talking and she sounded scared and sorry and it reminded him off himself and he almost felt like he could understand her.
He almost felt at home in that moment. In a sad way. In a terrible way. But at home nonetheless.
. O .
Furball was gone. One day, Furball was simply gone.
And Roasted Chestnut wasn't sure what to think. Had she gone back home? Had she been given away?
And Roasted Chestnut wasn't sure whether he liked the idea of Furball leaving, because Furball had loved the team and maybe, she didn't want to go home.
.
.o.O.o.
.
Carefully, the blonde girl looked around the corner, flinching back when she saw the man still standing, waiting, at the front entrance of the building.
She had to get out of here. She had to get out of here without her father seeing her, or else he'd drag her back home and Bianca did not want to be dragged home. Luckily, she had a plan – but that plan required one more person because, of course, she had left her key in their shared room.
"Juliet!", Bianca whisper-shouted, cautiously glancing at the man still positioned at the entrance. Could she risk to make a run for it to the benches on the other side of the lobby? Probably not.
Bianca looked back at her newly found friend, but Juliet hadn't noticed her yet and she let out an annoyed huff.
"Juliet!", she whispered again, knowing the girl probably still couldn't hear her. Dammit. She needed to get her stuff from her room and needed Juliet's help to get inside. Bianca could, of course, ask Touko to help her too, trying to get her to distract her father, or to talk to Juliet in her stead, but – maybe telling her best friend that her father was in town wasn't such a good idea.
She didn't want to cause a scene. And Touko was bound to cause a scene.
Plus, Touko had arrived in Nacrene City just today and was probably still exhausted anyway. And something had seemed amiss, if Bianca was fair. The brunette had become uncharacteristically quiet the past few days.
It had gotten so far, she hadn't texted her without prompting at all the last two days and Bianca was worried – but right now was not the right time for that.
"Juliet!"
This time, Bianca's voice was louder and she immediately regretted it. She could see her father move, could see him turn and frown and Bianca slammed herself against the wall, stopping her breathing and pressing her eyes shut.
Arceus dammit! Why did Juliet never carry her VisoCaster around?! This could be so much easier! And why couldn't her father just-just accept her wishes! Her mother had agreed with her after all. In her own convoluted way, but that wasn't important right now!
"Juliet!"
Bianca's voice took on a hysterical edge, but this time, at last, the other trainer noticed her frowning, before getting up at once and marching over to Bianca.
She looked less than pleased and Bianca didn't fault her for that – after all, she had messed up. None of this would be a problem if she hadn't left her keys in her room – and if her dad hadn't asked one of the nurses for information on her.
Arceus, how had he even proven that they were related?!
Before Bianca could properly think that through though, Juliet had reached her and the trainer deserved her full attention.
"Bianca, what-what are you doing?! We were going to meet in the lunchroom half an hour ago!", Juliet exclaimed the moment she got close enough to Bianca and, frightened, the blonde stretched her neck, trying to catch a glimpse of her father. He still hadn't moved away from his perch close to the entrance – which meant he hadn't discovered her yet either.
"Bianca, what..."
"Pshhh!", Bianca hissed, before taking hold of Juliet's wrist and pulling her along.
"My dad's here. And we can't be seen by my dad. It'd be a disaster!"
"What? Why?"
Bianca made her way around a corner and Juliet followed her without as much as a single word of protest.
"He wants to take me back home!", she responded, rounding another corner.
"He-He doesn't think I'm ready to take this journey and I-I thought I had lost him after Striaton!"
Another corner was rounded. They were only a few meters away from their room. And Arceus knew whether her father already knew her room number or not.
"What? Why would he-", Juliet asked, but she never ended her sentence. Juliet's breath hitched and she stared at Bianca with wide eyes, before pulling her into a doorway and hissing:"You-I swear to Arceus, Bianca, did you fail the test?! I swear, if you went on this journey even though you explicitly failed the test that looks whether you're responsible enough to go on this journey..."
"Of course I didn't fail that test, Juliet! It's super easy!", Bianca interrupted her, frowning, but her answer seemed to pacify Juliet a bit, as the brunette relaxed and loosened her iron grip on Bianca's wrist.
"I-My dad doesn't want me to go on this journey, but I got my mom's permission! So everything is ok! But-If he catches me, he'll drag me back to Nuvema Town and I'll have to sit out the rest of the year! And-And I don't want that! You need to help me, alright? I can't go back!"
Bianca looked at Juliet with pleading eyes and although the other girl looked fairly uncomfortable, she agreed.
Bianca's smile afterwards could have lit up the entire world.
. O .
Bianca was settling into her tent when her VisoCaster screen lit up, informing her about a newly received message.
She had managed to escape the PokéCenter by now – through the window while Juliet helped her carry hers stuff out. They had gone separate ways not too soon after – and Bianca had found herself a nice backyard that was open for traveling trainers. It was close enough to the main street that she wasn't worried for it to be some kind of weird trap – but obscure enough for her dad to, hopefully, overlook it should he try to find her once more.
Frowning, Bianca picked up her VisoCaster unlocking it and starring at the message.
Touko had written it.
|My day has been terrible
|Please tell me yours has been better
Bianca blinked. Touko. Of course. Touko had arrived today – and she had been in a terrible mood the past few days. Bianca had honestly been looking forward to this day for the past week – they had decided to meet up in Nacrene again, after all, and to travel to pinwheel Forest together once they had both won their badge.
Bianca bit her lip and dramatically let herself fall onto her pillow.
Well. Her dad hadn't just disrupted her sleeping arrangements apparently.
|Hey, Touko, remember how I said we were going to travel through Pinwheel forest together?
Touko's last text had been over eight hours ago.
.
.o.O.o.
.
"Soooo...you're planning on leaving Nacrene City already?"
"Uh...yes?"
The moment Touko had gotten Bianca's message, Touko had secretly rejoiced – not because she was happy Bianca was going to leave so soon, but because it have her something to do other than training – which...it wasn't nearly as much fun as it used to be.
Ollie was still mad, going as far as refusing to participate in some practice battles and Touko still couldn't let out Wobuff, Emblitz and Rockstar at the same time without risking a calamity.
It shouldn't surprise anyone she had jumped at the occasion to pinpoint her best friend's location and to then proceeded to drag her to a small coffee shop – that didn't sell just coffee, luckily – before sitting her down. And now, Touko wasn't going to let Bianca off the hook until she had the full story.,
"You-You arrived like what? Yesterday? You don't even have your badge yet!"
It didn't make a whole lot of sense. Bianca had fangirled about Nacrene City's library with Cheren for years and now she was going to leave without even having visited?
Touko shot Bianca an inquisitive glare from over the rim of her cup, her eyes never leaving the blonde girl's form. The blonde girl who, in turn, didn't respond at all and refused to meet Touko's eyes as she took a sip from her tea..
"Bianca? What's going on? Why do you want to leave?"
Bianca glanced side-ways, still slumped in her chair, before leaning back, shoving her cup of tea away. She didn't want to leave and the way Touko sounded, she knew that very well.
Bianca looked at Emblitz and then looked away, still refusing to meet her best friend's eyes. Eventually, with a groan, she put her arms on the table and buried her head in between them.
She could probably reflect this situation. Could ask a question in return, find out what had Touko bothered so much, but if she was truthful, she wouldn't mind talking to her best friend.
"I ads here", she eventually murmured.
"What?"
"My dad's here!", she repeated, lifting her head, just to let it plop down again immediately after.
"My dad is here and he already got me kicked out of the PokéCenter and I can't risk getting caught!"
Touko blinked. Then she blinked again and then...
"What?"
"Arceus, Touko! He's going to drag me back home and then I won't be able to finish my gym journey!"
"Didn't you just say..."
"This-This isn't about the badge!"
Bianca lifted her head once again, takign her arms off of the table and starring at some place behind Touko.
"I wanted to go on this journey to have some fun, make some friends and you know – realize what I want to do. And if I don't I'll become some-some dumb..."
She trailed off. Then she let out a sigh and huffed, before crossing her arms in front of her chest.
"I don't even know what the bad version of my life would look like. Can you imagine that? Everyone knows what the bad version of their life will look like! Because they have dreams and aspirations they can fail to meet and I don't have those!"
Bianca pushed herself away from the table, her back hitting her chair's backrest. Touko was about to respond, but Bianca didn't let her get a word in.
There wasn't much that could stop the blonde once she got started.
"I-Touko-I know you disagree and but-but you know I was never that set on taking on the gym challenge anyway! Sure, it sucks I don't get to see the library, but there's worse and-and I've always wanted to see Pinwheel Forest! And-and it keeps me ahead of schedule. I'll find my way somehow but I won't do it if my dad won't let me try stuff and you know how he can get!"
"Bianca..."
It didn't keep Touko from trying though.
"He's always been like this! Always!"
"Bianca..."
"And I don't care what you think! I know you're all about becoming the champion and stuff, but-but not me! No..."
"Bianca!"
Bianca flinched when Touko raised her voice and then nervously swirled her spoon around in her cup, averting her eyes once more. Touko let out a sigh and rolled her eyes.
"I-I over-reacted, didn't I?"
Nervously, the blonde lifted her eyes to glance at Touko and a soft smile slipped onto Touko's features. She shook her head and chuckled and soon enough, Bianca joined in.
"Yeah. A bit. But – that's not the point! Why didn't you just tell me earlier?! I would have helped you!"
Bianca lowered her eyes again eyes and Touko let out an annoyed huff, before intensely staring at her friend.
Bianca almost started squirming immediately and then, finally gave in.
"You-You would have overreacted and..."
"What? No! I wouldn't have overreacted at all!", Touko interrupted, offended at the very notion. But all Bianca did was give her a deadpan look and this time, it was Touko who was squirming.
"Well-maybe I would have said some rude things...", she admitted and Bianca's deadpan glare intensified. This time she even responded.
"No. No. You wouldn't just have said "some rude things"."
Touko wanted to object but, once again, she wasn't allowed to do so.
Bianca could be just as stubborn as Touko.
"You wouldhave marched up to my dad and shouted in his face and that's the exact opposite of what I should do right now...I asked Juliet..."
"Juliet?", Touko asked, recalling the girl from earlier. Bianca had gone to...to Juliet first to ask for advice?
Well, they hadn't traveled together and Touko hadn't texted her as much as usually, so, it made sense, right?
"Oh, yeah! I'm still traveling with her – you should join us sometimes, I swear, she's as much of a Pokémon fanatic as you are!", Bianca exclaimed, her milkshake threatening to spill out when she leaned forward.
"But anyway – I asked her and she said I should probably, you know, not cause a scene. So I'm going to travel further ahead already and, uh, sorry? I know we wanted to travel to Pinwheel Forest together, but I just really can't stay. You understand, don't you?"
Huffing, Touko leaned back, crossing her arms across her chest.
"Yeah. Yeah, I do. It still sucks though – and, anyway, you'll have to talk to him eventually! What's your plan anyway? Wait until he eventually does catch you and then drags you back home?"
"He-He has to give up eventually. Plus, if I managed to live on my own for long enough then, well – maybe he'll admit he's wrong?"
Touko raised an eyebrow at that.
"Your dad? Admitting he's wrong?"
Bianca shot Touko a glare and huffed, grumbling something along the line of "He's my dad, isn't he?", but Touko wasn't too sure.
"Well-maybe? Plus, who knows, he could never catch up to me and, sure, he's going to be real mad once I come back but hell, it'd be worth it!"
A smile crept upon Bianca's lips, be it only for a second. And then her expression darkened again and she huffed:"Whatever. I don't want to talk about this right now. You've got what you wanted and now it's my turn."
Oh. Oh no.
Bianca shot Touko an inquisitive glare and this time it was Touko in the hot seat.
"Spill."
Bianca wasn't supposed to ask that.
"Uh..."
"Let me guess...It's something with your team?"
She didn't stand a chance, did she?
"Yeah", Touko murmured, her eyes looking at anything but the girl sitting opposite of her.
Bianca frowned, stopping the swirling motion with her spoon and looked up at her, taking in Touko's posture – her slumped shoulders and tilted head – and the way her eyes kept fluttering from one place to another.
"You-You don't sound well. Did anything bad happen?"
Bianca leaned forward and Touko was thankful for her friends support. Bianca may not be able to provide an answer, but getting it off her chest – Touko hoped it'd help. And it shouldn't be such a big deal anyway!
"I-I let go of Lil. Send her back to the Professor and stuff...", Touko said, waiting for the relief to wash in – but ti didn't come. In fact, Touko was yet again reminded of the Lilipup's loyal eyes that hadn't shown an inch of understanding as to what was about to happen.
She felt terrible all over again.
"You-You don't sound like you're happy with that decision."
Bianca was only stating the obvious and her eyes still had to leave her friend's form even once and Touko wasn't sure whether to be thankful or not.
"I-I am. It's for the best."
Touko didn't like it when Bianca's expression shifted from wonder to pity. She didn't like it when her best friend smiled at her encouragingly either and she did not want to hear the words she was about to say.
"Touko, you've been looking forward to this journey for so long-" "I know." "-and-don't you think that maybe, you're, you know, missing the point?"
"Huh?"
Touko hadn't expected that.
"You've wanted to become a trainer for Arceus knows how long, longer than Cheren even! Because you always wanted to have a team and go on adventures and-don't you think you're defeating the whole point of this journey by doing what, well, what you are doing right now?"
Touko didn't answer (because she did not want to, Arceus dammit, because everytime Ollie looked at her, it was bad enough already). Instead, she not so subtly changed the topic and Bianca let her be.
They both had questions they had yet to find answers to.
.
.o.O.o.
.
The family was different, Big heart noticed. And it had been different for quite some time now. Furball was missing and so far, she had yet to come back. Soft Wave was mad at that human and refused to talk about her. Roasted Chestnut was weirdly happy and Nosy – well, Nosy wasn't doing much.
She was mainly ecstatic to find so many new things.
Big heart liked Nosy.
But, as much as Big Heart liked Nosy – they had been friends for quite some time after all – Big Nose did not like the weird thoughts trainer was thinking.
She was sad.
So Big Heart did what he could do best – he pestered her, but to no avail. He could run away as much as he wanted, he could gorge on every single berry the human let out of her sight for longer than a second, but to no avail.
She kept being sad.
Well, it was time to employ a different plan. One he hadn't come up with yet, because usually, if people were annoyed they didn't feel anything else and now he was all out of options. He didn't know the human so he didn'T know if a shimmering stone would make her happy or if she just needed to see more sun or if he should bury her in a hole so she could feel warm and protected.
But Big Heart had found the obvious solution: He'd simply ask Soft Wave. She knew that human longer than anyone else – she had to have an answer. He just wondered what it could possibly be.
"No."
Well. That was a weird way to answer his question.
"You don't know how to stop the human from being sad?"
"I know how. I don't want to help her."
Well. That was weird too.
"Why?"
"She-Our trainer is terrible."
Oh.
"She is?"
"Yes."
Confused, Big Heart turned the stones on his head. Well. That was unexpected.
"The human apologized. When she stopped Lil's transformation."
"Trainer apologizes all the time. Furball loved the team. Trainer took it away like she took away the evolution."
And then she left, glaring at him.
Well, Soft Wave wasn't wrong. Furball had loved being part of the team – but families never stayed together forever.
And the human was nice. She gave him food and shelter and hadn't been nearly as bad as some other Pokémon had described trainers to be.
And if he hadn't wanted to get taken away, he wouldn't have gotten so close in the first place.
So, Big Heart didn't like the human to be sad. He didn't like Soft Wave to be mad either. But he mainly didn't want the human to be sad, because a sad trainer was a boring trainer. He had always thought humans to be more...adventurous.
This one wasn't.
He asked Nosy about it and Nosy shrugged, stating that she didn't mind, before floating off to somewhere else and the second time Big Heart had tried to talk to Soft Wave, she had gotten mad at him for bringing it up and while it was fun to tease her, that hadn't been fun at all.
It only left Roasted Chestnut to talk to.
Big Heart liked Chestnut. He was cool. He teased others too. He was fun to be around. They could become the best of friends, probably, if Roasted (he hated that nickname, like Big Heart found out on his second day) just weren't so sensitive sometimes. He'd get used to it though, Big Heart was sure of it.
So, the obvious thing to do was to talk to him about the humans weird behavior.
"Is she always this way?", was the first thing Big Heart asked. They were having dinner and their human was gone right now, doing that thing where they got themselves wet on purpose for whatever reason. They were in a room in that weird, big cave humans built in every single one of their cave systems. They were alone, for now, but there were other "beds" as well, so maybe other humans would join them. After all, if they had placed their nests here, they'd come back eventually.
Their human didn't do that, but their human was weird.
"No. I don't know. Don't care", Chestnut answered and Big Heart observed him some more. He hadn't turned to him when talking and Big Heart felt mildly offended by that.
So he threw a pebble that had loosened from his skin at him.
That got him the Pansear's attention. The Fire-Type Pokémon whirled around, hissing at him, before grabbing hold of the nut he had been happily eating a mere second earlier. That Roggenrola ate all the time and he was not going to steal his food!
"Why is that human behaving that way?"
There had to be a reason. Big Heart wasn't stupid – she had started being weird when Furball had disappeared and, maybe it had been like in his cave? With the other humans? When they had taken Nosy? It didn't make any sense. And Chestnut wasn't helping either.
"I don't know! I don't care! Let me eat!", he growled, before turning back, leaving Big Heart to roll the stone on his head. That was a weird answer. Why wouldn't Chestnut care? So he asked.
"Why don't you care?!"
Roasted Chestnut hissed again, seemingly annoyed. But it wasn't Big Heart's fault he didn't answer!
"I don't like that human. Now, go away!"
"You don't like that human at all?"
Roasted shrugged again – but this time he stopped gnawing, choosing to stare at the nut for a few seconds.
"Sometimes. Sometimes I like that human."
"Sometimes? But she feeds you!"
"My mother fed me too."
Oh. Big Heat turned away, observing his food. His brother had fed him – his mother was long gone. So his brother had helped, until he was old enough to take care of himself.
"Are you mad at the human?"
"Yes."
"Oh."
Big Heart thought about what Roasted was saying.
"Will you always be mad at her?"
The Pansear froze. And then he hissed, snatching up the nut and running to the other side of the room. Glaring at him one last time, he hissed:"You are annoying."
And Big Heart looked after him, before shrugging and turning to his own dinner once more.
. O .
When Nosy heard about Big Heart's plan, she was confused – what was wrong? But then he explained and she understood and she felt sad – she didn't want Touko to feel bad. The girl was nice and sweet and only got her the best food, which was amazing and. It. Always. SMELLED AMAZING!
Nosy had been skeptical at first – she had wanted to leave her old place to find a new place, that much was true, because her old place was boring and cold and new places were neither boring nor cold, but she hadn't planned on joining a trainer, because humans were weird and loud and also just really weird.
But Touko was showing her plenty of new things, so Nosy could stay with her for now, she supposed. It was pretty amazing. Amazingly amazing. It was the best thing she had ever done and Nosy had done a lot of amazing things.
A lot lot. A lot lot lot.
A lot lot lot lot.
So when Big Heart proposed to hug the human, because he had seen other humans do it to her and she had seemed to feel better afterwards, Nosy was all on board, because snuggles were warm and nice and she liked being cuddled too! It wasn't difficult after all.
Nosy didn't like doing difficult things, because they were hard and Nosy didn't like hard things.
They might as well try. Not, that Nosy particularly cared – there were more important things than human feelings – but Big Heart was her friend and Soft Wave seemed nice enough and Nosy didn't like her sulking.
It was annoying and also sad, very, very sad and that made Nosy sad too!
So she agreed. And Big Heart told her to find the best place to have a nice hug, but Touko didn't seem to like it, because she ran after her, shouting that weird human name that had been bestowed upon her and then called her back into that weird ball.
The other's hadn't fared much better either. Roasted Chestnut had tried to be nicer to Touko, but the girl had just been confused. Big Heart had tried to hug her, but Touko hadn't understood and had gotten mad at him for attacking her and Soft Wave...Soft Wave was still mad.
Well. It wasn't that important anyway.
But it wasn't amazing, because hugs were amazing and Nosy really wanted a hug!
.
.o.O.o.
.
It was yet another meeting at yet another cafe and yet again, Touko was glad for the distraction it provided. Of course, Cheren had challenged her to a battle at first, but she had declined and he hadn't pried.
And so far, Touko hadn't given him anything to explain her uncharacteristic reluctance either.
She knew he was curious, from the way he'd glance at her from over the rim of his cup, but Cheren was too level-headed to ask too many questions.
For now.
"You haven't been in Pinwheel Forest yet? There's this meadow just outside of it that's a great place to train – there's a PokéCenter nearby too!"
Of course Touko knew about that place. It wasn't too far off from an abandoned railroad line and it was a well-known, if not extensive, place for training, not unlike the dreamyard. There was a wide variety of Pokémon to be found there, not too mention that the place looked positively stunning. The many hills and small ponds gave it an almost magical atmosphere and it had been the setting for many a scene in some drama and another. It was one of the places Touko had always dreamed of visiting – even if the internet told her that it was overrun by other trainers and tourists. Apparently, proposing on the hill looking out all over the valleys beneath had become somewhat of a trend ever since "Kick it!".
"Not yet. Isn't it like two days from here?"
Most of Pinwheel Forest around Nacrene City had been cut down throughout the years. Apparently, the city had been founded as a logging village – but unlike Azalea Town, they had lost that title years ago. By now, it was Unova's capital or arts – mostly wood carving though.
Maybe hadn't been completely uprooted after all.
Also, they had plenty of adorable little cafes (it could almost put Lumiose City to shame!) and Touko adored small little cafes.
"Yeah. It's totally worth the trip though. I'm probably going to catch a Panpour there once I beat Lenora. I don't want to take on too many Pokémon at once."
Touko frowned. That made sense – Leon may have had a point of not taking on too many new Pokémon at once – but it wasn't what irritated her so much.
"Cheren. That place is two days from here. How did you manage to get there that quickly? I arrived just today and I skipped most of Route Three!"
Cheren shrugged.
"I gave up on catching a Roggenrola for now and instead caught myself a Pidove instead. And after that I decided to just skip the rest of Route three altogether. Plus, it's not necessarily a two day journey from here if you walk fast enough..."
And take a bus back to the city after been thoroughly drenched by the rainstorms that had taken over most of southeastern Unova, but Cheren didn't add that.
"Really? That's so cool! Were there many people there?"
Eagerly, Touko leaned forward, barely balancing on her forearms. Her eyes were shining with curiosity – and Cheren leaned back, lifting his cup to his lips and took a sip.
He took his time too.
There had indeed been many people there, but somehow Touko behaved almost too excited – though that may be just his own imagination – and he knew she probably hadn't just called for this meeting to ask about his day.
She could have texted him to do that. Which she hadn't.
"Uh Cheren, are you going to a..."
"You know, Touko – I've noticed you've been weirdly quiet the past few days..."
Cheren started scrutinizing her, tapping his fingertips together, his coffee standing in front of him, forgotten.
"It almost felt as if you were distracted – what happened?"
Touko blinked. And didn't answer. Unlike with Bianca, she really had only met with Cheren to catch up and to talk about the second gym – Cheren wasn't the best at giving advice for life.
Thus, she fell silent, leaving Cheren with a bunch of questions and the stubborn determination to figure out what was going on. He wasn't going to let this go. She hadn't behaved like herself and something must have happened – and she hadn't told him about it.
They had been friends since kindergarten!
"Did Mr. Mysterious guy ditch you?", he guessed, with a raised eyebrow. It made sense and Touko was blushing, but...
"Wha-What? No! I-I mean yes! But-But that's not the point!", she exclaimed, slamming her cup on the table a bit too violently. Emblitz flinched before scowling at her. But Touko didn't even notice. Instead, she was playing with the hem of the table cloth, before letting go and leaning back, pushing her cap deeper into her face.
Cheren frowned. This wasn't the way Touko was supposed to behave. At all. Something was amiss and...oh.
"Did "Lil" evolve?", he asked and, annoyed, Touko shoved her cap back, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
"Yes."
"But isn't that good news? You wanted to remove her from your team once she evolves and you did – isn't that exactly what you wanted. I fail to see the problem – quite frankly, I was convinced you would keep her."
Touko huffed. Cheren chuckled. But then he stopped because she seemed genuinely upset and as much as Touko could be grumpy, she was rarely ever truly sad.
"Do you think it was the wrong de..."
"No!", Touko protested immediately and Cheren flinched back at the vehemency in her voice:"Not at all!"
Maybe Cheren was better at giving life advice than she had expected – after all this was more about Pokémon anyway.
"It's just-I know it was the right decision! I know! My team doesn't need a Herdier – or, well, I guess a Stoutland – and I wanted to let her go earlier anyway! But, uh, well..."
Touko nervously bit her lip and lowered her gaze once more, swirling around her tea – it was too cold for anything else.
"Ollie's mad at me. And I'm not sure, but Emblitz is behaving weirdly too and Rockstar and Wobuff are, well...I don't know. They've been on the team for barely a week and I'm not sure what to think yet, but-but it feels like I made a mistake and I don't know what to do!"
"Don't you have a dad you can ask that kind of stuff?", Cheren asked, one of his eyebrows quirked again (Touko found herself to be irrationally mad about it) as he took a sip from his coffee and Touko shuddered, smelling the bitterness all the way over here.
She averted her eyes, refusing to meet his.
"Touko, I know you don't like him, but he's a great trainer!"
"So-So what?!"
"Just...talk to him? He's your dad! He'll gladly help you and I bet your mom and Bianca told you the same thing!"
Touko bit her lip and tried her best to hide behind her cap.
"Bianca didn't...", she eventually muttered and Cheren let out an exasperated smile.
"Look – I know you don't like being told what to do and stuff, but I'm not going to sit here and listen to you mope just because you're too proud to ask your own dad for help!"
"Well, then don't! But, guess what! I can solve this problem myself. I-I don't need my dumb dad's help to do anything."
Cheren simply stared at her. Then he shrugged adn took his cup in his hands, warming his fingers before taking a sip.
"Well – that's your call to make. Do you already have a date in mind for your gym battle?"
.
.o.O.o.
.
It was early evening and Touko and her team were still camped out on Route 3. They had trained the entire day – after her conversation with Cheren – and it had been much needed. There wasn't much time left if Touko wanted to stay at least somewhat on schedule – it was Wednesday already, of the fifth week. It'd take her two days – maybe one and a half – to get to Pinwheel Forest, where she'd stay for at least one day and then she'd travel back. If she split the training day into two, she'd still need four days, meaning she would have to leave tomorrow. And then she'd have to hope to win the badge on her first try if she didn't want to leave Nacrene City too late.
It was ambitious and probably impossible, but Touko was stubborn and there wasn't much stopping her (she could always take a bus back to the city if she was really pressed for time) – except for one thing.
Her team.
They were eating dinner, all gathered around a pan sitting on a battery-driven hotplate a new addition to their traveling gear. Touko had found it not too long ago and Ollie had basically forced her to buy it. It had been quite expensive, so she had asked her mother who had called her spoiled before telling her that this was a very early Christmas present.
Touko hadn't protested, because Ollie had been so happy and now – now Ollie wasn't even looking at her food.
It had taken Touko quite some time to assemble her team the way it was now – all of them peacefully munching on their food. Touko had prepared everything she had needed to prepare – turning on the hot plate and then following the instructions on the Pokémon food manual. She had used one of those cool pans with six different compartments so you could cook each of your team members favorite food and once and once four of them were filled and everything was cooking, she had, one by one, called out her team.
Ollie had been first. The Oshawott hadn't done much. Which would be fine but they were having dinner and Touko had seen Ollie's nose twitch so she knew her starter knew what was going on and just – didn't care.
Touko had swallowed her guilt.
Next up was Emblitz who hadn't done much either. Then Wobuff who had simply floated around and then Rockstar and that was when stuff had gotten out of control fast.
It started with Touko realizing she had forgotten about her own food. She turned her back on her team for just a moment to grab a sandwich and once she turned back, Wobuff had already started to get interested in the hot plate. And almost burned her nose. The moment Touko needed to get the Woobat away from it, Rockstar decided this was the perfect time to start a fight with Emblitz who in turn chased the Roggenrola around the campsite which then ended up in them accidentally attacking another trainers Pokémon.
And Touko had turned around for all of ten seconds. Tops.
But now they were all seated, peacefully, and Touko would have been able to enjoy it, if...if it didn't feel like something was missing. Usually Lil would be sitting next to her, slowly crawling her way into Touko's lap after she had finished her dinner. Maybe Ollie would try and contest that place and sometimes, Emblitz would move a bit closer too, eyeing them grumpily and then Touko would have to try her best to make sure the two of them didn't start a fight again.
When Rockstar and Wobuff had joined the team that dynamic had changed – but not by much. Instead of climbing her lap, Lil would shepherd her two newest teammates while Ollie would claim that place and sometimes Emblitz and Rockstar would silently – well, no. Loudly. Mostly loudly – bicker on the other side of the circle.
It had been relaxing. And now, Emblitz was still bickering with Rockstar and Wobuff was still a handful, but Lil wasn't there to help her out anymore and Ollie was glaring at her instead of Emblitz and it just didn't fit anymore.
And it sucked.
"So guys, lets dig in! We've-We've had quite the eventful day, hadn't we?", Touko exclaimed, biting into a sandwich that tasted like paper and she wished she could blame it on the quality or the weather.
Wobuff looked up from her dinner for a second and then stretched, before moving closer. She was the one who had taken Lil's old place – but Touko's right side was still empty.
It sucked.
"We-I don't know what we'll do tomorrow, but maybe we'll travel to Pinwheel forest already! It's not far away and hey! That's where Embltiz is from!"
She tried to sound excited, but utterly failed and the silence that followed her words made it feel even more damning. Usually Touko would hear some barking. Maybe some of the high-pitched sounds Ollie sometimes emitted. Anything. But now all she got was another glare from Ollie, a scowl from Emblitz and a pebble thrown at her by Rockstar.
Touko glanced at her VisoCAster. Wobuff moved a bit closer and screamed. She let out a sigh. Maybe she could call her mom first..?
.
.o.O.o.
.
"I know you don't like him, but your father is an amazing trainer and has been so for years – I'm sure he's been through the same situation. Just-Just call him, alright? And if you don't want to ask for his advice – then don't. But...you've been on this journey for almost two months and you've called him once! He's excited about your progress as much as I am...So call him? Please?"
Touko's mother could be persuasive. Very, very persuasive. And she was great a guilting her daughter into doing things.
"He even told me to get that hot plate for you! You could use this call to thank him!"
Sometimes.
Well, maybe it wasn't so much what Touko's mother had said and more the fact that Cheren had urged her to call her dad as well and that, well – Ollie was still mad at her.
And although Touko knew she'd have to suck it up eventually, it didn't make the actual task of dialing his number any easier.
Ollie would have to forgive her eventually, right? She'd have to, well, she'd have to come to terms with what had happened, right?
But the Oshawott tended to be rather stubborn and she needed to get that dumb second gym badge within the next week or so and she still hadn't properly trained for it. Of course, her team had gotten stronger over the past few days – but it was questionable whether it would be enough for the second gym.
It was infamous for how hard it was.
She had to get over this, didn't she? With an annoyed huff, Touko dialed her dad's number before throwing her VisoCaster back into her pillow. She groaned again. She was half hoping he wouldn't pick up – that wouldn't have been her fault after all – but no such luck.
"Hello? Hello? Is someone there?", a voice came from the speaker and Touko held in a sigh.
"Excuse me? Is this supposed to be some kind of prank?!"
Touko huffed, before finally grabbing her VisoCaster once more.
She wished it were a prank.
"No. Sorry dad. I just...accidentally dropped my VisoCaster."
She turned the display in her direction and gave the camera half-hearted smile, before letting her gaze drop to her dad. He was wearing rather warm clothes and was evidently in a cave – and hadn't he said he was training up for the eight Kantonese gym?
Upon seeing her his eyes lit up and Touko almost felt bad for not having called early, but quickly squashed the feeling, because this was her dad they were talking about.
"Are you in Victory Road?", she asked, mildly bored. He had managed to defeat Clair two years ago – Touko had never seen him more excited, it wasn't his first eight badge, but one of the "big three" - and he did have access to the place. And if Touko were to choose, she'd train right there.
But as it turned out, he wasn't in Victory Road.
"Mount Moon, actually. I'm looking for a Moon Stone right now – need one for my Nidorino. It's really pretty over here and, kind of, the worst place to train, but it is what it is... And, what are you up to?"
Touko didn't answer immediately. She had heard of Mount Moon before. Of course she had, her dad had been the one telling her about it, describing the cave in great detail and she had used to listen to his every word about it. In fact, he had promised to take her there eventually.
"Not much. I'm in Nacrene now..."
"Oh! Did you get the badge already?"
"No."
"Well, let me tell you, when I first battled Lily, she was a huge pushover! But that's been some time ago, hasn't it? Did they change gym leaders?"
"Yeah. It's still normal typed though."
"It is? Oh...is Wellspring Cave still open to the public?"
"Yeah."
"That's great! Just catch yourself a Roggenrola and you can resist any powered-up normal moves they may want to throw at you. You wanted to catch one anyway, didn't you?"
He looked at her, patiently awaiting her answer and Touko simply shrugged. Her dad's smile faltered ever so slightly and for a split second, he averted his eyes, before turning them back, his eyes having taken on their usual excited glow.
"I looked at your team plans, by the way..." Her mother was a traitor. "...and you wanted to catch yourself a Timburr?"
"Yeah. Fighting types can be useful."
"That's great! You can get it just before Pinwheel Forest and – and you probably already planned on doing that anyway, didn't you?"
He asked, his smile turning shy, and Touko nodded, letting out a sigh.
This wasn't going anywhere and she didn't need her dad to tell her the obvious. She could read about that in every trainer's guide online. It wasn't why she had called.
"Dad, I have a question?", she said and refused to look at him as she did. He perked up that, his smile widening and Touko crossed her arms in front of her chest.
"What is it, Tou?"
Touko flinched when he used that nickname. Nicknames were reserved for people that truly knew her after all. But she carried on regardless.
"I let go off a team mate of mine."
"The Lilipup I assume? That's...later than I expected."
"Yeah. Lil. I let go of Lil. And now...I'm not sure if it was the right decision anymore and my team is kind of mad and..."
She trailed off, glancing at him, hoping he'd pick up where she had left at and just telling her what to do – but he didn't.
Instead he asked:"So?"
Baffled, all Touko could do was stare at him for a moment, before shaking herself out of her stupor.
"S-S-So?"
"Yeah. Why would that make you think you made a wrong decision?"
"They're mad at me!"
"And they'll get over it – Touko, you're their trainer. You'll have to make decisions like that all the time. You don't get where I am by watching every single step you make. Where-Where's my girl that just – did things?"
Touko stared at him and her father looked back and then, her gaze turned into a glare.
"That-That's a terrible answer! They'll get over it?! That-I'm-We're a team! A team! Not just-what the hell, dad?!"
He let out a sigh and Touko couldn't help but feel insulted, because how dare he?!
"I-That's terrible advice! What am I supposed to do with that answer?!", she added, glaring at her father. And he seemed to flinch back, before nervously rubbing his neck.
"I-I'm sorry. That came out wrong. It's good you care about your team. It's great, actually! But – you're the trainer. You're calling the shots. You're the one that understands the strategy, who gets the bigger picture. And sometimes that means having to go against your team's wishes. It's just – that's just how it is!"
He was smiling again and Touko scowled because it did make sense and she didn't want him to make sense.
"Cool. And what am I supposed to do now?"
"I don't know", he responded. Which was great. She had called him to ask a question and now he couldn't even answer her.
At least it seemed like he wasn't done yet.
"Every Pokémon is different. Every Pokémon has their own personality and really, it is your job as a trainer to figure out what makes them go. I can't give you a fail safe guide on how to do things – this whole journey is about growing up and growing up means making decisions, after all! If it were me, I'd say carry on and respect their boundaries – respect their need for some space and accept they might be mad at you for some time, but don't forget that you'rethe trainer!"
Touko's dad chuckled but Touko didn't and his smile disappeared as easily as he had shown it.
"I-Touko...Maybe you don't like my advice. And you know what? I understand why! You've always dreamed of having one, harmonic team and – if that's what you want, that's great! But if you want to treat Pokémon like your equals, you'll have to treat them like that all the time. And, if Ollie is mad at you – all you can do is talk to her and explain why you did what you did. And if you don't know your own reasons – maybe it was the wrong decision after all. Maybe you'll need to travel more to figure it out, maybe Ollie is just being over-dramatic, maybe there's a solution to all this neither of us have realized yet – but I gave you my advice. Take it or leave. I can't force you and I won't because each trainer is unique.
I gave you my answer. It's up to you to decide what to do with it."
He gave her yet another smile. Touko still wasn't impressed.
"You sound an awful lot like you know how I feel."
Her father's gaze softened at that and for a second it seemed as if he was reaching out for her, before realizing she wasn't actually next to him.
"I've started somewhere too, Touko. I've made the same mistakes as you did – and I came to the same realizations. Of course I know what it feels like to give up a teammate. It's why I told you that they're your Pokémon. Because, eventually, you'll learn that lesson anyway and if it makes your journey any easier, you might as well learn it now."
He smiled encouragingly and Touko did her best to give a smile in return.
She failed miserably.
"So – that's the answer?", she eventually asked, giving up all pretense and she hated how it made her father's gaze turn into pity. Like she was some naive child with not a single clue of the world.
"It's one answer, Touko. And it is mine."
"Cool. Thanks dad."
"You're welcome, Tou. It was nice seeing you again – call me again sometime, will you? I've missed hearing your voice."
And he smiled and Touko wondered, if he had missed her that much, why he didn't call her then.
.
.o.O.o.
.
"Ollie? Ollie, are you ok?", Touko asked, tentatively stretching out a hand. They had just gotten back to the PokéCenter and Touko had let her team out of their Pokéballs for the time being – the dormitory was empty and she wouldn't be gone for long.
But while the other three were happily chatting, Ollie was still sitting on the bed, her arms crossed in front of her chest and it made Touko hesitate.
"Ollie?"
Her starter turner her head, looking at her. Then turned around and recalled herself.
She almost cried that time, because she had never felt so rejected before and because she knew that she somehow deserved it.
But she couldn't take Lil back. She had made her decision.
She'd stick with it.
. O .
"You-You can't stay mad at me forever...", Touko pointed out, as she tried to navigate a battle against a wild Pidove. It was early noon and they were preparing for the next gym badge – Rockstar and Ollie were out at the moment, training together.
But Ollie didn't answer. She finished the fight and that was it and Touko felt numb, not daring to talk to her starter again for the rest of the training session.
. O .
"I know you miss Lil...", Touko started. It was noon. They were eating lunch. And Ollie refused to participate.
"I-I miss her too, but she's not co..."
Ollie recalled herself once more. And Touko hated it because if Ollie kept her behavior up, her dad might have a point and she didn't want him to have one.
Being a trainer had to be about more than just interchanging one's team. She knew her dad did it all the time. She knew most gym leaders did it. She knew for sure that almost every champ had at least three teams to choose from, as to make them less predictable should anyone ever break the non-disclosure contract or should their team be leaked through other means.
.
.o.O.o.
.
N hadn't meant to run into anyone when he exited the gym. He really hadn't, but he had been distracted by too many thoughts to properly pay attention to where he was going, as he was eyeing the shimmering badge in the palm of his hand.
This gym battle – it had gone different than the last one.
It made him feel dirty.
The first Pokémon he had asked to battle had fainted. It had been a Sawk named Strong Hand and he had almost defeated the opposing Watchog, but then had been taken out by revenge and N – N felt terrible.
Dirty.
Disgusted.
Battling was horrendous as it was. A battle could severely hurt a Pokémon (even if some of them claimed not to mind). A battle put them on display like some sort of living doll. A battle was forced upon them for no reason other than their "owner's" entertainment and it was the first thing N would put a stop too, once he had the power to do so.
But fainting...fainting was the worst of it.
Pokémon rarely ever fainted in the wild. Sure, they fought battles, but more often than not a Pokémon would run once they realized they didn't stand a chance anymore.
They didn't have that choice during trainer battles.
N didn't want to look Strong Hand into the eyes, being able to imagine the Sawk's look of betrayal too well.
He didn't like it.
And maybe, if he hadn't taken out his VisoCaster to text Anthea (he had – maybe – hesitated for a second when he had seen the chat with Touko. He still hadn't texted back, because he didn't know what to think yet, but no one would ever known he had done), he wouldn't have run into anyone, but he had taken out his VisoCaster.
He should have expected it.
N let out a startled scream when he collided with another body, just barely holding onto his VisoCaster. The other person stumbled back a few steps upon impact, just narrowly avoiding the Oshawott who was standing behind her (who hissed at her trainer, no less) and barely being able to catch herself. N was about to offer his excuses – but then froze, mid movement.
That Oshawott, they looked familiar. Their arms were crossed, which was an untypical gesture for a Pokémon and they reminded him of someone.
And then he realized.
Soft Wave.
N's gaze snapped back to the girl he had just run into, his mouth falling open.
"T...Touko?"
Touko didn't seem to notice his words at first. She straightened herself, shrugged out her hair and adjusted her cap, all the while babbling:"Oh, I'm so sorry, I was just in kind of a hurry and-and N?"
She halted her movement as well, gawking at him in bewilderment, and he stared back in much the same way.
He...had not expected to run into her just...like that. The probability for that to happen was decisively low – especially considering it had happened twice already, in the span of less than two months no less.
And now it had happened a third time.
He supposed he shouldn't have completely discounted the possibility. While low, it was still there and it had only been heightened by the circumstances – they were both, technically speaking, trainers and had been in the same area.
It was still quite a coincidence. Touko, however, didn't seem to have any trouble dealing with the situation.
"N! I-I didn't expect to, uh, run into you like that!", she exclaimed, taking a step back.
N forced himself to smile. He had not planned for this and was entirely too unsure as to how to properly behave in this situation. He had wanted to text her eventually, once he had gotten his mind cleared up – his father's council was, for once, not helpful. Neither were Anthea's and Concordia's and N wished Zorua was still here, because, whenever Zorua was around, things just made sense.
But Zorua wasn't. And, quite frankly, maybe the Dark typed Pokémon was biased.
It didn't matter though. His father had told him time and time again, that, as a king, he'd have to deal with countless of different situations. And, where he not to plan for them, he'd have to improvise.
Squaring his shoulder, N put on his best smile, trying to appear as normal as possible. His father was right. Furthermore, he had taken on this journey to study human behaviour – he should be thankful for being gifted with such a handy coincidence.
"Neither did I", he responded politely, stepping back as well. He needed a plan. Something to talk about.
"It is pleasant to see you again", he said, keeping his smile in place (and Touko frowned, so he supposed the way he had phrased that was weird). But it was nice to see her again. It really was, even if he was still unsure what to think (she...couldn't just have tricked him, could she?).
And then an epiphany hit him. Because all this time he had been unsure how to act regarding the situation and now he could get her version of the story (he had already tracked down and interrogated the grunt, after all).
He just had to find the right question. And just as Touko was about to say something, to break the awkward silence between them, he exclaimed (maybe a tad too loudly):"How's your team!"
Maybe he sounded a bit too eager, but too often already had he seen people walk away from each other because of silence and this was his chance!
Surprised, Touko's mouth formed a silent "Oh", before blushing (which...was a weird reaction to what he had said?). Then she pushed a stray lock out of her face and blushed some more (He'd have to ask Anthea about that).
(The whole display took all of five seconds. Maybe he had simply missed something.)
"Uh...Go-Good! They-They're good...", she stuttered, but then she trailed off, bit her lip and somehow, something in her expression changed, giving it a somber edge.
(Her blush was gone now, too, which, quite frankly, was a shame, because it looked beautiful on her).
Maybe he had asked the wrong question.
"I mean..."
Touko let out a sigh, hugging herself:"No. Not, they're not good. Stuff-Stuff happened and, well I'm having some trouble..."
"As you should", N silently thought, before internally scolding himself. He did not have the full picture yet and she...sounded so sorry. Her thoughts were too jumbled for N to understand them properly – he almost never could understand human thoughts. Almost never – but he had been taught about unspoken communication and she displayed all the signs.
After he had thoroughly analyzed her, that was. Which was apparently a weird thing to do, as Touko's bewilderment was clearly expressed on her features.
"Anyway. I-uh, guess that's not important…?"
"What? No!", he all but shouted and, Touko flinched back, her eyes wide open with confusion. Immediately, N realized his mistake, shutting his mouth. Would she be angry? His father would be angry now and so would be the majority of the sage's (though to a lesser extent).
But she didn't. She seemed surprised, but then her expression softened, and she glanced sideways, making eye contact with Soft Wave. The Oshawott scowled again and N...thought he could hear something in between the many vowels and syllables she was spouting.
"Oshawott."
The sorrow she felt in that moment took his breath away, slamming into in with enough force to make him stumble back a step.
She didn't even notice.
"We're-We're going through a rough patch right now and, well..."
She smiled shyly and N was about to answer, but he couldn't.
"Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott, Oshawott."
Her sorrow slammed into him a second time.
According everything he had ever been told, according to the things he had seen up to this point, with his own eyes, accordingto Ghetsis, Touko should feel happy about her Pokémon's misery.
But she didn't. Quite the opposite, in fact. She felt horrible.
According to the grunt she had lorded her power over a defenseless Lillipup, but of she felt this intensely for Soft Wave, why wouldn't she extent the same level of caring to "her" other Pokémon.
"...I'm trying to find a way to patch things up with them", Touko ended her sentence and N's throat fell dry (she was trying to make an effort to patch things up!) and after a few seconds he chocked out:"You-You are?"
He didn't care that he was stammering. He could hardly concentrate and for once regretted not being able to dismiss a spoken thought. Feverishly trying to hold on to his own thoughts he blurted out "Then...where are you going?", trying to find his path in-between the sorrow. Shouldn't she sit her team down, talk to them, apologize, grovel at the Lillipup's feet?
"The library. I-I asked my dad for advice, but his advice sucked..."
Her voice trailed off and it almost seemed to N as if she meant more by that. But she never finished her sentence and while her sorrow had diminished and he could think clearly again, he still felt a bit dazed.
"Anyway. I was hoping to find some information back there – I mean, I don't know for sure, but I can try? Looking it up on the internet didn't really help, so, uh, yeah...I don't think it will be of any use, but, ugh, this is just a mess..."
He agreed with that. She probably wouldn't find a single piece of advice in that library. But she was trying and maybe he could help her! He didn't get to suggest anything though, as Touko seemingly didn't feel comfortable talking about that topic anymore.
"Oh, by the way, I'm sorry for not texting you at all for a week or so, I...", she let out a sigh:"You can probably imagine, but I had a lot on my mind..."
She smiled sweetly. N frowned, lightly shaking his head to get rid of the residue.
"You are sorry?"
"Yes?"
"But...I did not message you either!", he said, sheepishly fidgeting with the trinket hanging from his wrist. But she didn't seem to care at all, instead shrugging non-nonchalantly
"Eh. I guessed you were probably busy or something."
"You are not even mad?"
N was perplexed. He hadn't even needed to offer his excuses and she just...didn't care? The only people he had ever met being this easy-going were Anthea and maybe Concordia, but even they insisted on proper etiquette.
"Mad? Why would I be mad? We're friends!"
N blinked. This-This conversation wasn't going as planned. He had thought he'd offer her his excuses at some point (preferably via text message) and she'd scold him, before ultimately accepting them, as one was supposed to. They'd then act distant for a few weeks before going back to how things had been.
But that wasn't happening. Instead she hadn't expected him to excuse himself in the first place and had elevated him to the position of "friend".
Maybe she had been mistaken?
"Friends?", he asked curiously, eyeing her expectantly.
"Huh?"
"We are friends?"
"Uh – yes? I mean, we said so last time, didn't...I-I mean, if you don't want to be friends, that's perfectly fine too!"
She stopped closer and instinctively, N took a step back, because she was too close.
Touko seemed to get the message.
"Oh, I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude or anything", she said, before putting some distance between them too and now N almost felt like it was too much.
"No, no! We are friends. I just, uh..."
He was stammering again and he did not like that he was letting go of his posture this easily.
"Last time we met, you called me a "battle buddy", hence my confusion. Are all battle buddies friends?"
Touko blinked. Then gawked at him. He shifted uncomfortably. And then, finally, Touko huffed, crossed her arms and scowled.
"You know, you don't need to bring that up every single time we talk", she grumbled, pouting now and turning her head sideways.
It confused N a great deal, because why was she mad? Had he insulted her somehow? Could "battle buddy" be a derogatory term if used incorrectly? Had he insinuated something he hadn't wanted to? He had noticed already that while texting she seemed to be put off whenever he called her that way, but it had never occurred to him that it could be insulting. But then, why did she use it? Were there specific circumstances under which one could say "battle buddy"?
N was about to ask, but Touko had already given up her previous stance and now peered at him curiously.
He didn't even have to say something.
"N...You do know "Battle buddy" isn't an actual term, right?"
Her question caught him off-guard.
"What?"
Touko's lips started twitching.
"N, battle buddy...it's just a term I came up with because I didn't know what else to call you. We weren't really friends yet but wanted to meet up to battle, so...it just made sense!"
N blinked at her. Blinked a second time. A third. And then:
"It...is not a "normal" term used to describe people?"
Touko shook her head, now outright grinning, as her eyes shone mischievously.
"No."
That...made a whole lot of sense.
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"Oh."
"You-Oh Arceus, you actually didn't know", Touko chuckled and looked at him and N just – looked bad. Looking slightly miffed.
He looked ridiculous. Touko bit her lip from trying to keep the laughter in, but didn't fully succeed.
"Are you laughing?!"
Now he looked incredulous and Touko couldn't contain it anymore. Her laughter broke free and she almost doubled over.
"I-I'm so sorry, I swear!", she wheezed:"I swear I'm not making fun of you!"
She really wasn't.
But he looked so offended and spotted what was probably the perfect mirror of the expression she had worn not five minutes earlier and Touko couldn't help herself.
Plus, the corners of his mouth were twitching. He couldn't be that mad.
"I really don't think it is that funny", N eventually huffed, but not his face was threatened to be split by a grin.
"It probably isn't", Touko agreed, slowly stopping her laughter, though she was still smiling widely.
"I just-I needed a good laugh and..."
She peeked at Soft Wave, who in turn scowled and it made the mirth in Touko's eyes just...disappear.
N missed the way they had been lit up not second earlier. He supposed that was a weird reaction.
Maybe he could ask Anthea about it.
"Anyway", Touko said, glancing back at him, forcing the smile back on her lips and the difference was so jarring, he felt himself forced to look away.
"We, were, uh, talking about battling?"
She was switching topic. Was...Was this really just because of the evolution?
"Are we still on for that practice battle? My team could use some practice, though, I'm not sure whether they'd be at their best..."
N blinked. Then he deflated, because, of course. She was still a trainer. She'd want to battle.
He should have known.
"Oh, I-I'm sorry", he started, smiling widely and feeling entirely too awkward. He wasn't sure what to say and he couldn't help but feel bad by the way Touko's enthusiasm seemed to just fade away, but...maybe battling her right known was the best decision. The Pokémon helping him out had endured too much already and he didn't want to make them partake in a battle that they hadn't signed up for.
Tempting as it was. N glanced at Ollie, who was walking behind her trainer.
She wasn't talking, her thoughts carefully guarded – but she didn't seem ok. And for a Pokémon to guard their thoughts around humans at all was – well, it was weird.
But now wasn't the time.
"I – I really am sorry", he said.
He didn't want to lie to her. But battling now just wasn't the right thing to do. Or at any given time. Though his father had told him "Exitus acta probat." The ends justify the means.
But not this time.
"...but I...have to leave already. I need to meet up with someone..." That part wasn't lied, as he was indeed meant to meet his father in Striaton City soon. "...and I fear, should I leave any later than today, I may not make it", N finished, hoping she'd accept the explanation.
Touko's smile disappeared, which was a pity, but then understanding bloomed on her face and he almost let out a sigh of relief.
He didn't like lying. He definitely didn't like lying to her. And if she were to find out...He didn't want to lose her as a friend. They were friends, after all, at least according to Touko and she knew more about that topic than he did (even if the time they had spent on befriending on each other had been rather short – Concordia had once told him that it could take up to a month) and he was unsure whether she'd take lightly to him lying to her.
He supposed not. He probably wouldn't take lightly to it either.
"Oh, that-that sucks. But, it's probably for the best anyway."
Touko peeked at "Ollie" for a second, letting out a sigh and for the first time in their conversation, N could hear the Oshawott say something.
"You deserve it."
Nervously, he glanced at her. She really had stopped that evolution, hadn't she? Had she-Had she even apologized? Had she let Lil evolve afterwards?
"We-I need to fix this with my team and, maybe battling should take the backseat for now..."
She smiled sadly, peering at the gym sign on top of the building and N-N felt a warm feeling blooming in his chest, extending to the rest of his building. It was a tingling sensation, one he knew well, even if he had experienced it less and less over the past few years.
He had felt it when Zorua had won the battle against that one bully. He had felt it when he had mastered the beginner's maths class in a month instead of six. He had felt it when he had first worn the cap that Anthea and Concordia had given him for Christmas all those years ago.
He was proud.
Touko was trying, wasn't she? She could learn? She would learn. He had been right after all, and sure, there had been a setback, but-but he was on the right track! He had made a friend and on top of that had found someone who was willing to admit the wrong in their ways.
"I think that was the right choice to make, Touko", he beamed and her gaze found her way back to him and she beamed even wider than he did.
"You-You really think so?", she asked. She was biting her lip again but she was smiling – though it seemed unsure – and he beamed even wider.
It brought her blush back, so he counted that as a win.
"That's-I'm glad", she murmured, tucking another strand of hair behind her ear. They fell silent afterwards and it almost felt as if their conversation was over now, but...he didn't want it to be over yet.
He glanced at Soft Wave. He still had to talk her too, maybe the entire team and he regretted rejecting her previous offer – then again, she had brought up a valid point on her own already. Maybe he could…
"Anyway. When are you leaving?"
"Huh?"
His gaze snapped back to her and she chuckled, slightly shaking her head.
"When are you leaving? You mentioned it earlier?"
She looked up at him from big blue eyes and he almost told her he didn't have to leave after all Which was true. He had managed to earn his badge earlier than anticipated. But that meant admitting to having lied earlier and he doubted she'd be as forgiving concerning that.
She might even demand an explanation, which he could not give. Touko would most likely not take all too lightly to him knowing about her team's state – even if he hadn't done anything wrong.
But, maybe they could talk some longer and…
"Oh, I suppose that was a dumb question...it's getting pretty late, isn't it?"
It was. It was getting late and if he wanted to get somewhere decent in time, he'd have to leave now.
He'd barely make it before nightfall anyway.
"Right. Right. I...was just on my way to get my bag, before leaving. I guess that means we will see each other again some other time…?"
He hoped they would. Maybe they could meet up once he had made it to Castellia City…?
"So...you're leaving right now?"
"Right now, yes."
N didn't want for the conversation to end yet, but for all intents and purposes it was done. He didn't expect anything else to come from it. Except this was Touko and had never been known for making rational, thoroughly discussed decisions.
She glanced at her bag first, peeked a Soft Wave second and, thirldy, settled on grasping the strap of her bag more tightly.
"Great! Maybe we can travel together!"
N hadn't expected that at all.
Now, you may think I just flexed my crazy Latin skills on you, but I do, in fact, not have any crazy Latin skills to speak of (I did have Latin in class, but I only passed it because our teacher liked history as well). However, I have Google. I didn't even plan on using the Latin phrase at all, but I didn't know the English translation either and looking for the Latin one was somehow the first suggestion made by Google, so I just rolled with it.
Anyhow.
Welcome to the end note! As mentioned: No ferriswheelshipping yet, but it's coming. Next chapter. In fact, as you may have guessed, next chapter will be nothing but 4k of them going on an an unofficial date. That also will last more than just one day, because I decided to make that trip a two day trip. That will be more than 4k, because, lets face it – we all know that story by now.
(No, seriously, this chapter was supposed to be just 4k too and we all know how that ended.)
Maybe I'll throw some Shadow Triad goodness into it too because I kind of have to built up Retienne some more (if you have read the oneshot, you know why =p) and at this point I'm just rolling with the flow.
Anyhow. I hope I'll be more inspired for next chapter – it's less sad and I will have settled in and maybe I'll finally be able to finish that one Oneshot that is already too long but whatever.
I hope you enjoyed the chapter ^^ Leave a review if you did (I'm not sure about the last scene and Emblitz's backstory scene, so I'd love to hear your thoughts!) and, like always, read you later ^^
Bluestpaw
