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(This story is rated M. Mostly for language. But I wasn't sure how far I was going with some themes while writing. That said, this is an angsty chapter (or my attempt at it) and I wanted to insert this short warning beforehand for anyone who may have had panic attacks or anxiety. It isn't too descriptive, but I just wanted to let readers know who might have triggers.)


Chapter 13: Centered

"I am terribly sorry, my boy," Chancellor Palpatine said over the transmission. "We will do everything in our power to bring your son back to you."

Lux fought the urge to roll his eyes at the Chancellor. But he thought that might come off as juvenile. The last thing he needed was to be patronized.

"Is there any more information you can tell us about the kidnappers?" he continued, looking from Lux to the king.

Next to him, King Dendup stroked his beard thoughtfully. In the chaos of the night, he was woken up before Lux and Ahsoka had returned to the palace. Ahsoka was upstairs still unconscious. They didn't know how long she'd be out, so Lux wasted no time giving all the details he could to the king about the kidnapping.

He regretted doing that now.

"The housemaid was killed by a lightsaber, correct?" The king looked to Lux, who nodded stiffly. "And from the reports of our guards, they were red. We also have confirmation that the ship used in their escape belongs to Count Dooku."

The chancellor sat back in his seat, a look of concern on his face. "Oh my. This is disturbing news. What you are describing, your Majesty, is the weapon of the Sith, the ancient enemy of the Jedi."

The king looked astonished. "A Sith? What motive could they have to do such a thing?"

"Because, your Majesty," Lux cut in. "Count Dooku is a Sith." The king looked at him, astonished. As did the Chancellor. Lux momentarily forgot that not everyone had knowledge of the Sith. Ahsoka had told him all about the Jedi's suspicions of Dooku. He tried to clear his face of any emotion and went on. "I know Dooku. The kidnapper was too small to be him, but I know he is involved somehow."

Palpatine stared at Lux for a moment. Lux didn't know if he held any ill feelings against him after his last speech in the Senate. If he did, he hid it well. Not that Lux cared much about that now.

"I believe, given the circumstances surrounding this abduction, the best course of action is to send the Jedi. A normal clone unit will do no good against the likes of Count Dooku and his associates," the Chancellor stated quickly.

Lux's emotions betrayed him. "Now hold on Chancellor! Are the Jedi really-"

"Senator, your son was abducted by a possible Sith!" Dendup said. "The Jedi are the best way to find him."

Lux thought of his wife asleep upstairs. After everything the Order put her through, the last thing he wanted was the Council's hands on his son.

"Please reconsider, Chancellor," he begged. "I have allies who are more than capable of-"

"Senator Bonteri, I can assure you that the Jedi are more than capable of returning your son to you safely. I will personally request that the best and readily available Jedi be placed on this assignment. They will notify you when they reach the Onderon system. Now please, know that my thoughts are with you in these troubling times. But I must return to my duties. Good day."

The king nodded. "Of course, good day. Thank you, Chancellor."

Palpatine glanced one more time at Lux before his image faded. It could have been his exhaustion - Lux had only slept a handful of hours - but he thought he saw the Chancellor smile at him. He shook his head, trying to clear it.

Dendup placed a hand on Lux's shoulder, probably assuming it was comforting. "You should rest, son. The Jedi will be here within the hour."

Lux had considered telling Dendup about his marriage to Ahsoka and that she was Alek's mother, but now he decided against it. As much as he trusted the king, he had just proven to Lux that he was obligated to put the safety of Onderon above secrecy.

He gave the king a small nod and left the room, headed to check on his wife.


Ahsoka sat on the floor of the nursery. She had woken up about an hour ago. The sun was beginning to rise on Onderon. She didn't give the beautiful sunrise a single glance.

Her bag sat packed and ready next to the door. She ordered a ship be prepared for her in the palace hanger. All she needed was a location. Her senses told her Alek was still in the system. He was still close. If she acted quick enough, she could rescue him herself.

But there was something she needed first.

All the pieces lay in front of her in a pile. She had been itching to complete her lightsabers. Ahsoka wanted nothing more than to build them, hop in a ship, and take off.

Her anger built up in her chest. It made the metal parts in front of her quiver. Her breathing picked up, coming in short breaths.

How dare they.

How dare they!

How dare they threaten her family? How dare Dooku go as far as to kidnap her and Lux's child? Why? To what end?

She felt the heat from her emotions. The power that came with it flowed through her body. Ahsoka had been taught to stifle those emotions. If she got too upset her instructors would tell her to let her anger go. To not let it control her.

But now she let it run free. The anger at Dooku and his new apprentice. At the Sith. The Jedi. The Council. The Republic. The Separatists. The war in general. Everything.

The anger at herself. For leaving. For failing. For all her mistakes she made that led to this moment. She let it all out.

Ahsoka didn't realize she was screaming. A guttural sound from her body that expelled all her emotions. Tears ran down her face, hot and burning her eyes. It was as if all the pain she had felt over the past year came boiling up at once. She had never felt so hurt or so sad in her life.

Ahsoka was going to let it keep going. Why stop it? She could feel how powerful her emotions were. They gave her more strength than she knew possible. If she could just find a way to use that power…

But something stopped her. Someone.

"Ahsoka!"

Lux's voice called her back. He was pleading for her to stop. She could feel his presence near her. It was calming. She felt his hands on her arms, holding her down. Grounding her.

"Ahsoka, think of Alek…think of our son!"

Her son. Her baby. Her family.

The heat in her body cooled. She felt her anger release. All of the pain she had been experiencing evaporated.

Lux brought her back. She found her balance again.

She opened her eyes, blinking a few times. She looked right into Lux's silver eyes. Around them, Alek's room looked like it had been hit by a tornado. Toys were scattered and smashed, all the shelves had been tipped over, the crib now lay in splinters in a corner, and even the wallpaper was shredded in places.

Ahsoka breathed heavily. In front of her, Lux still gripped her arms.

"Ahsoka?" he asked softly.

She looked back at him. His hair was wind-blown, and it looked like something must've cut his cheek. Ahsoka collapsed into him. Lux wrapped his arms around her tightly.

"I-I think I felt…the dark side," she said nervously.

Lux rubbed her back. "I heard some crashes. Then you were screaming. When I got here you were floating in the air. Everything was circling around you. You were in some sort of trance. I didn't know what else to do, so I tried to snap you out of it."

Ahsoka sat up. She felt her tears run down her face. Lux took a hand and gently wiped them away.

"I know," he whispered. "I miss him too."

They said nothing, only sat on the floor holding each other. Nothing else needed to be said. Lux rubbed her back as she calmed down again. Ahsoka's breathing finally slowed, as did her racing heart.

"What were you doing in here?" he asked after a while.

"Meditating. Or trying to anyway." She looked around the floor. All of her scraps of metal lay untouched. She pulled away from Lux, keeping one hand in his. "I wanted to put together my lightsabers. But to do that I need to be focused. I was too upset to even start."

Lux scooted next to her on the floor. Not many outsiders of the Temple got to see any stage of lightsaber construction. Ahsoka noted Lux's curious face.

"How about now?" he wondered, squeezing her hand.

Ahsoka studied their intertwined fingers. She knew she couldn't hold onto him forever, but Lux was what was keeping her steady right now.

"Could you stay with me?" she asked in a tender voice. Lux nodded. Ahsoka smiled. She kissed the back of his hand and placed it on her shoulder. Lux shifted to sit behind her off to the side. She reached into her pocket, bringing out the two crystals from Ilum.

She placed them on the ground next to the pile of metal and wire. Ahsoka closed her eyes. Lux did the same.

This time, she felt the Force circle her. It wasn't good or bad. Hot or cold. Ahsoka could feel the great power that resided in both. Right now, she felt a tug more to the dark, to the burning like before. But Lux's hand on her shoulder was a tether. She felt how his presence kept her from moving too far into one side or the other.

The pieces began to move. They floated into order. Ahsoka knew exactly how they were supposed to fit together. She could sense the design. The feel of the handle. The weight of the sabers in her hand. Everything. How it felt to wield them. The skill and control she had worked so hard to develop. The pride she felt at carrying them with her.

She heard the soft clicks as the pieces came together.

Ahsoka opened her eyes. Two lightsabers floated in front of her.

Lux removed his hand. She looked back at him with a smile.

He leaned forward. "Go on, love."

With cautious hands, she grasped the hilts. Ahsoka instantly felt part of her shift back into place. She ignited the blades.

They were pure white.

The familiar hum of energy through her hands energized her. She turned off the blades. The hilts were functional, but not totally finished. They'd have to do for now.

They stood up. Lux brushed aside some of the debris of the room to pick up her bag. Handing it to her he said, "The Republic is on their way."

She shouldered her bag. "With Dooku involved, I assumed as much."

But he had a guilty look on his face that made her tense. Ahsoka crossed her arms. "What? Is there something else?"

Lux tried to speak carefully. "They sent the Jedi."

Her stomach sank. "What?"

"The king told the Republic about the possible Sith before I could stop him. The Chancellor insisted they send the Jedi and a clone battalion. I'm supposed to meet them in orbit once their cruiser arrives."

She put her hands on her hips. Ahsoka felt ready to cry again. How was she supposed to trust the Force when it kept allowing bad things to happen? What positive thing could possibly come from kidnapping her son?

Oh.

Ahsoka wanted to punch something. In some mysterious, messed up way, the Force was telling her it was time to face the Jedi again. It was the same feeling she sensed every time Master Yoda or Master Kenobi would wait until the end of whatever difficult task she had to complete to explain the lesson. They would only smile, shake their heads, and explain to her how simple everything was. As a Padawan, it was infuriating. Apparently, as an adult, it was just as infuriating.

The Force just loved fucking with her plans.

"When are they arriving?" she asked.

"Anytime now."

Ahsoka swallowed hard. "Perfect," she said sarcastically.

Lux put his hands on her shoulders, making her meet his eyes. "Look, I can send you a transmission with any information once I know it."

Ahsoka took a few breaths. She knew the Force would guide her, despite her current displeasure with it at the moment. Cutting herself off from it wouldn't help her find Alek.

The com link on Lux's wrist beeped. He pressed to answer it. "Yes, your Majesty?"

"The Republic fleet just came out of hyperspace. Your ship is ready to take you to meet them," the king responded.

Even from the surface of the planet, Ahsoka could sense the sudden appearance of several hundred beings in the atmosphere above.

"I should get going," Ahsoka said.

Lux nodded. "I'll walk you to the hanger."

He pulled her in for a soft kiss. Ahsoka let him hold her for a moment. She savored how calm she felt with his touch. Together, they made their way to the palace hanger. They did their best to put on business-like faces.

But they both knew they failed epically.


Lux is her center.

Just like Padmé is Anakin's.

Not all attachments lead to the dark side.

Yes, her sabers are white. For this story, I needed a clear distinction between Ahsoka and the rest of the Jedi. I'm aware of how she obtains the white color in canon, which is different than what I wrote. (For that story, read E.K. Johnson's Ahsoka, it's awesome)

So far, only Ahsoka knows who has Alek. So why hasn't she told Lux yet?

Stay tuned loves! I'm going to be switching major perspectives soon! Take a guess in the comments as to who that will be.

Follow and review!