Chapter 12

Sorry for the time it took to update! I must say that one was awkward to write, maybe simply because it was awkward for the characters. Not my fav chapter but not bad either! Hope you'll enjoy it!

There weren't many things which could make Dean tremble in nervousness. He had dealt with Wall Street sharks and mobsters and none of them had ever made him tremble. But here he was trembling as he looked around for his little brother. He spotted him quite easily, Sam was taller than most people.

A smile appeared on his face before he realized it. He had changed quite a bit, but in a flash, Dean could still see the eighteen years old boy who told them he wanted to settle with his girlfriend. That boy was still here, because the girl was still here as well, holding hands with him, with a slightly swollen belly. Sam spotted him as well and smiled too, leading Jess along. Feeling a slight shake, Dean just turned to Cas'.

"Here they are."

The two brothers hugged each other before saying anything. No matter what happened in the past, right now, they were just happy to see each other.

"It's good to see you!" Sam just uttered, almost lost with words.

"It's good to see you too!" He let go of his brother and looked at him more closely: "You got tanner! Now you're a tanned moose."

"Yeah, well, some tan would do you some good!"

"Shut up!"

Being a bit left out, Castiel and Jess looked at each other, and she smiled.

"So you're Castiel, and that's Claire, am I right?"

"Yeah, and I guess you're Jessica," He told her, handing out his hand which she took while Claire looked at the beautiful woman in admiration. "Hey honey, you can call me Jess," she told her. The little girl turned her head away with a big smile and Castiel huffed in amusement.

"She can be shy when she meets strangers."

"She wasn't shy with me," Dean pointed out genuinely, his attention back to them.

"You can't impress everyone," Sam teased nicely.

"It's normal, she is often impressed whenever she meets a pretty woman. Like when she met Lexie or Anna," Castiel explained

"That's flattering then," Jessica concluded, giggling a bit.

"I guess Sammy's gonna make one hell of an impression over her," Dean joked.

"Shut up."

This came with a big smile though, it was nice to see his big brother hadn't completely changed. He turned to Cas' then, and extended his hand.

"I'm sorry, I'm Sam."

"Castiel Novak, glad to meet you."

The exchange was warm, Dean and Jessica however looked at each other with awkwardness. He felt guilt rising again, he remembered her when she was seventeen and intimidated by him and John, and how cold he had often been to her. She gave him a tiny grin, though.

"Glad to see you too, it's been a long time."

"Yeah, too long."

"Maybe we should go. There is a bit of road, and your little girl is probably tired," she suggested.

"Not for now but she'll probably be soon," he assured.

Taking his daughter by the hand, Castiel followed them as they went to the car, the child was still excited, though her nap in the plane hadn't been long, she was full of energy now that there was so much going on around. The drive back was pretty animated, Claire asking many questions when she heard Jess was going to have a baby. Castiel bit his lip, knowing she would ask him one day where baby came from, he hadn't thought yet of what he would tell her.

He looked outside with some strange fascination while talking, it was really the first time he was coming to the West Coast, and he had to say it was beautiful, California definitely had charm. And he was happy to be in a small city, although Dean had assured him Los Angeles was beautiful, being in a small city was an even bigger change. He was still curious to see L.A., though. They mostly speak of the places to visit and the best beaches where they could go. The house Dean was renting for a few days wasn't far from theirs, it wouldn't be hard to spend time together.

Their house wasn't very big, but as Sam said, it was theirs, and it was lovely. It wasn't that far from the sea, and though it couldn't really compare to their family house, it was definitely a good place, perfectly fine enough for a small family, modern and well taken care of.

"I hope you and your daughter aren't allergic to cats?" Sam asked to Castiel. "We just got one."

"No, it will be alright."

The big black cat was waiting for his owner inside, laying nonchalantly on the couch. But when he saw Claire running toward him in excitement, he sprinted away like crazy.

"Claire, don't run after the cat you're just scaring him." Her dad took her by the shoulders to stop her while saying so.

"Want the kitty!"

"His name is Salem," Jessica explained. "We'll show you how to pet him."

She was still pouting, though. They turned on the lights and Dean smiled, the inside felt a bit homely, it was decorated in a warm and sober style, a bit like their family house.

"Thought you would have had a dog," Dean pointed out.

"Yeah, we thought of it, but then that cat came and decided this was his house. We didn't seek him, he just decided he would live here from now on."

"And you couldn't say no," Dean huffed in amusement.

"Indeed. Betty is dead, isn't she?" He had a twinge of nostalgia thinking of their old dog, she was a sweetheart and he used to love her. He hadn't seen her since he was seventeen, and at times, he would wonder how she was. Considering her age back then, he was pretty sure she was now dead. It also made something in Dean twitch, they both loved that dog.

"Yep, she was old. She got two pups, though, Jasper and Sasquatch."

"Sasquatch? That's the nickname you gave me! You, bitch!"

Dean laughed at this and shrugged. In normal times he would have just teased his little brother but he had decided to smooth it down a bit. A bit. "I just missed you."

Sam rolled his eyes with a smile and went to the kitchen and put something in the oven before turning it on.

"We will have dinner soon, we just have to warm it up. You haven't told us what your job is," Sam pointed out while coming back.

"I'm an English Teacher, and you?"

"I became a lawyer, specialized in children's rights," Sam explained.

"As for me I'm a psychiatrist," Jessica explained. "I'm not specialized yet, I still hesitate. Oh, I forgot, you want to drink something? We have some nice wine."

"Fine with me," Dean replied.

After her dad gave her the small toys he had brought for her, Claire sat on the carpet near the couch and started to play, still looking around in hope to spot the cat. Castiel spotted something on the coffee table: tarot cards. With curiosity, he took those and observed, it looked traditional although he had no idea what it was really supposed to be like. He really understood nothing to that.

"It's Marseille's Tarot. You want me to draw cards for you?" Jessica's voice surprised him. She sat on the couch, putting down the drinks while Castiel was still standing.

"Oh! I'll be fine. You believe in those things?"

"No, but it helps thinking. You see, each cards have a signification, but if you read several books or ask several people about it, you'll see they never give you the exact same meaning. So it's quite open to interpretation; When I draw cards, let's say, I ask myself whether or not I want to try to have my own cabinet, I can draw the cards and depending on what I have under my eyes, it can help me consider what the dangers are, why it would be good. It doesn't give me the future, but it clear out my own pros and cons, the dilemmas."

"I see. Never thought of it like that. You want to open your own cabinet?"

"Yeah, but it's risky."

"You should do it," Sam interjected while sitting at her side, passing an arm around her shoulders. "It would be better than the clinic."

"Where are you working now?" Dean asked, standing at Castiel's side and watching the cards with curiosity as well.

"Oh, the local psychiatric hospital. I would like to be more independent but nothing says I will have enough patients."

They continued to talk and eventually dined. They had cooked duck with vegetables, something Castiel didn't remember eating before, but it was delicious. Even Claire who looked at it in a dubitative way ended up loving it.

"How did the two of you met, by the way?" Jessica asked.

Hell, Castiel knew that question would come. Dean just replied with perfect calmness: "In a club, the Blue Jungle, Sam and I used to go in here."

"Yeah, I accidently bumped into his car."

He didn't miss the twinge of nervousness in Dean's eyes and kinda enjoyed it.

"You got a car accident?"

"No, I was walking on the sideway, I was a bit drunk and I stumbled and fell against his car. He wasn't happy."

Dean rolled his eyes, a shade of pink appearing with the embarrassment. Sam giggled. "It was the Impala, right? That was your dad's car," he clarified for Jess. He knew his brother perfectly.

"Yep. I wondered why the hell some guy had suddenly decided to crash against it!"

"I didn't really 'decide', otherwise I would have landed on something a bit smoother!"

Both Sam and Jess laughed at this but Dean bit his lip, though he was still smiling. Now that he remembered that, his reaction might have been petty. Yeah, Castiel hadn't been a peach, but he was drunk, he had also been quite a jerk while being drunk in the past.

They remained together a bit, talking about one another, and about small things. Claire eventually fell asleep, and Castiel had to carefully collect her in his arms and laid her in the car, only earning a few grunts.

Dean hadn't shown him any pictures of the small house he had rented, it looked pretty though Castiel couldn't see much considering night had already fallen. Yet even under the nightly sky, the sea was beautiful, with the moon and stars above it softly enlightening the dark rocks and the sand while the water would remain as black as ink. This place had a magnificent view.

He smiled before getting in, Claire still limp in his arms, snoring very softly. Dean and he quickly found the smaller room for the little girl. As Castiel put her in the bed, he looked at her small form before exiting the room. He could have visited the rest of the house, but he decided to go out instead. He wanted to watch the sea. The house was on the cliff, a wooden barrier around the garden, which was good for Claire's security. He leaned against it, and just contemplated everything.

You wouldn't see much of the city from here, mostly the sea and stars, and it felt incredibly peaceful. He felt a strange vertigo as he could think of everything. He was so far away from New York! God to think of how far he was and how his life had changed! That serene landframe and the quiet night gave him all the space needed to reflect over that. Strangely, he wasn't really worried for himself or Claire anymore. Anyway, if Dean ever tried to hurt him or his daughter, he would fight back. He didn't know what he would do, but weirdly enough, he had confidence he could do something.

'But I doubt he will do something stupid.'

He breathed deeply, absorbing the air as if he was absorbing the ocean as well. He looked at the water, it was still possible to see the moves of the waves, it was entrancing, he could have stayed here all night maybe. He heard the footsteps behind him, but didn't make a move until Dean was standing at his side. He just turned his head to look at him and looked back at the black water.

"What are you doing?"

"Just watching and enjoying. You should try."

"Why?"

"Something tells me you don't spend enough time on those things."

Shrugging, Dean leaned against the rails, at his side. That expression he had…It was quite like the one he had when he was dancing. He longed to touch him, but he was aware he wouldn't be welcome. There was some melancholy as well in his expression. Was Castiel…

"You're not thinking of jumping?"

This time, the man looked at him with astonishment. "How did you know?"

A cold feeling crept through him. He didn't want Castiel to do that or to even think of it! Dean's expression made him laugh as he realized what kind of misunderstanding just occured.

"I'm not talking about killing myself! No, I was just wondering what it would be like to just dive in the ocean while it's so dark, so peaceful."

The relief on Dean's face was very clear, and Castiel couldn't help but smile. "Don't joke with this, it's not funny."

"I know, I'm well aware. I was thinking of jumping, but not like some morbid thing, just what it would be like to dive and how it would feel to swim in those dark waters."

Of course…He remembered what Castiel told him about his mother, of course he was well aware.

"If Claire wasn't sleeping, I would have suggested you to go down the road and to the beach to swim. But well…"

"Indeed, it's impossible."

Dean looked back at the ocean again, thinking of Castiel's words. There would be some thrills indeed to imagine what it would be like to swim in those dark waters, to have the ocean for yourself. "You love it, don't you?"

He only got a nod as an answer. A part of him told him he should have left Cas' alone, but he also had the feeling this was the good moment to try to bond.

"There is one thing we didn't discuss."

"What?"

"Our Honeymoon. Where should we go?"

Indeed, that was something he never thought about. "I don't know, but what should we do with Claire? Generally couples don't go with their children."

"She could stay with someone else. One of your friends, or Mrs Tidler, maybe."

The serene expression disappeared and Dean kinda wanted to slap himself. "I never left her alone for so long. I never even left her for an entire day."

"I understand. But we don't have to go for a long time. You trust your friend Anna, don't you?"

Thinking about it, it's true that he did intend to leave her with Anna first, because he was scared of what Dean could do to her. It was a different time, of course, but asking Anna to babysit her for a few days was nothing compared to it.

"I guess…I would feel a bit guilty to leave her while I enjoy some travel."

"Oh, you know kids don't really realize at that age. And it would be only that one time, for the Honeymoon. We could take other vacations with her."

He thought of it, maybe Dean was right, Claire wouldn't remember much of it, and maybe she would be more tired than anything. He also guessed it would appear more natural to the public.

"Where would we go?"

Getting a bit closer, Dean hoped he would like what he had to offer. Their elbows lightly touched, Castiel briefly turned to him and Dean looked at the sea as well.

"I thought of Greek Islands after meeting your friend Pacome. It's beautiful, if you like the sea, you would love it. Or Egypt, I guess it's past descriptions, I went there once but it was a long time ago."

Now that would be fantastic indeed! He thought over it, unable to decide. Biting his lips, Dean couldn't but imagine the two of them together in the ocean right now, with no one to see them or hear them. It was an exciting thought to think they would have intimacy in the open air. Funny, he never fantasized about making love in the sea before.

"It's hard to choose but…Maybe Greece. I would like to discover Egypt with her," his future husband explained, interrupting his thought.

"Yeah, I agree. I remember when we went to Egypt, I was eleven and Sam was seven. The pyramids had us amazed."

"But what about you? Do you really want to go to Greece?"

"Of course, I love the sea too, you know, and Greece is wonderful, the food, the beaches, and the monuments."

"Really? The monuments?"

Dean gave him an annoyed look. "I'm usually not into that stuff, but Greece and Egypt are exceptions. Is it that surprising?"

"Yeah, a bit." He gave a little laugh. "It will be my first Honeymoon and travel out of the country. Never thought it would happen like that." His smile disappeared and he became melancholic again. "I'm going to bed. I hope Claire won't be lost when she'll wake up."

Dean watched him leave silently. He wasn't even sure whether or not things were going well, Cas' was less angry, but still distant. Maybe some times together would really help know each other. He looked at the landscape, thinking too, about what happened today, about Jess and Sam. They looked happy together, and right no he envied Sam. Looking at the sea, he wondered what his life would have been like, if maybe he had met Castiel in different circumstances, maybe when they were younger, before any prejudices could occur. How would have things evolved? His father would have probably been disapproving of Castiel, and himself…He wouldn't have given his trust that easily.

As much as he loved his dad, he realized more and more how wrong John had been to be so wary of everyone. But now, Dean couldn't completely blame him. All that because of that woman. Forget it. It's in the past.

As he went back, yawning and longing to go to bed, he passed before Claire's room and hoped she wouldn't be lost as Castiel thought. She did wake up crying the next morning, and Castiel actually found himself wondering where he was for a slight moment and whose arms were wrapped around him. That moment of confusion didn't last, he remembered who he went to bed with and where he was. But when did he allow Dean to take him in his arms?!

He roughly pushed him off of him and woke up immediately to go to his daughter who was crying, lost because she had no idea where she was.

"Daddy!" She extended her arms, big tears running on her face. He lifted her and kissed the top of her head.

"Calm down, sweetie! We're at the house for the holiday, you remember? We'll go to the sea, can you hear it?"

She was still sobbing but it lessened and she seemed to pay attention to the sounds outside. Castiel did as well and he grinned The rhythm of the waves and the gulls and birds singing could almost cover any car sounds. She extended her arms toward some birds flying above them, and Castiel huffed in amusement. He remembered Jess and Sam said they wouldn't join them before the mid-afternoon, it would only be the three of them this morning. He looked at the house and had to admit Dean had good tastes. Last evening, he hadn't paid that much attention to it. It was mostly wood and windows, giving it a traditional feeling coupled with the contemporary architecture. The best was probably the bay window giving a good view of the garden and the ocean. Claire didn't paid much attention to that, all she cared about were the birds and the sea.

"We go swim?!"

"We will, but we'll take breakfast first."

He heard someone stepping out of the house and saw Dean coming toward them shirtless. To think he had hold him while being half-naked…He had to admit Dean was well-built, really. Overall, he was handsome, it was a truth he couldn't deny. But why did he look so annoyed?

"Good morning."

"'Morning. How are you doing, kiddo?"

"Wanna go swim!"

"Same for me," Dean replied with a yawn;

Castiel put her down and she started to look at the flowers around. Dean grunted again and looked at his future husband with annoyance.

"Did you really have to push me like that? Not exactly the best way to wake up!"

"Sorry, your majesty, but I don't think I allowed you to take me into your arms!"

"I did it when I was asleep, I wasn't even aware! I told you I wouldn't do anything to you without your consent."

Castiel wondered if he was lying or not. He doubted it, Dean had been rather straightforward until now when he had been an ass.

"You know, you accidentally put your hand in my face, you kinda slapped me during sleeping," Dean grumbled.

"Tonight?!"

"Yeah! See: you don't remember it."

"I guess that does reflect our mutual wants. But well, let's have breakfast, Claire is hungry."

Though he didn't reply immediately, Dean pondered over those words. After a rather quick breakfast, they went own toward the beach, the little girl was very excited, looking at the waves with fascination. Once they walked on the sand, she ran toward the water and her dad caught her back, not wanting her to go alone.

"Wait for us, sweetie."

Even though her dad was careful, Dean was pretty sure he was as gleeful as his daughter. They settled their stuff and unlike Dean, Castiel kept his tee-shirt, and he was about to ask him why when he remembered the scars on his back. It was understandable. He had wished to see his shirtless, though, but he was still handsome.

"Come on, let's go swim a bit!"

"Yeah!" Claire exclaimed excitedly.

He would keep a good old on her even though she had her inflatable arm bands, still trying to teach her how to swim. Dean mostly watched them at first, though he was pretty amused to see that Cas' was as enthusiastic as his daughter.

"You look like a kid yourself!"

"Well, I grew up in a small town by the ocean. Everything here kinda reminds me of it, and I always loved swimming in the sea, better than a swimming pool."

"Yeah, I can't disagree on that."

He was just about to swim again when he caught one look from Castiel, one quick glance, but Dean noticed. He knew that kind of stares…His future husband just checked him out! He couldn't believe it, Castiel told him he just wanted to slap him but it seemed otherwise right now. Feeling in a teasing mood, he waited a bit and when Castiel returned to the beach, letting Claire go and play with some other kids, he got close to him. They were just standing close, not touching, just close enough to feel each other, just like that time in the store where he had bought him a suit.

"It's pretty hot."

Castiel looked at him in surprise and Dean cracked an innocent smile. "The sun is getting higher, you should be careful she doesn't get any sunburn."

"…Oh."

For once, Castiel looked like he didn't know what to say or do, and he could have sworn his face had gotten a bit redder. Lord, he loved that! To think that maybe he could take him out of balance, not because he would threaten him with his power, but because he was seducing him.

"Why are you standing so close to me?"

"Why is that a bother? We sleep together, after all…"

Castiel's eyes widened a bit, then he huffed and gave Dean a glare. "Technically, we do," he whispered. "And I also want to remind those two women looking at you that you're not single."

"What?"

With a slight nod he showed him two women looking in their direction. He had noticed them looking at Cas and at him too. "They probably wish you were shirtless. So do I, but not for them."

"Stop that," Cas' grumbled with some annoyance and a bit of red on the cheeks.

Dean just chuckled but did stop, after all he got what he wanted so he just went back to the water. When noon came, they went back home to eat and to let Claire have a nap before going back to the beach to retrieve Cas' and Jess. Since they had to stay home a bit, Dena took that occasions to check out some things for work while Castiel read a bit. They didn't talk much, but they were fine reading and working in the same space.

He had received a mail from Charlie, there had been no new attempt to hack the system, and she also announced him that she would come to the wedding with Jo. He smiled at this, his friend definitely didn't loose time while he was away! He still wasn't sure whether or not the recent events (the fake rumors, the hacking and the mugging attempt) were linked, but it was good to know nothing wrong happened while he was gone.

Claire interrupted that quiet time when she came out of her room, full of energy again. "Dad! Dean!"

Surprised to hear his name called by the little girl, Dean stopped his work. "Hey kiddo."

"Got a good sleep sweetie?

"Wanna go swim again!"

Not only that wish was granted but he also got an ice-cream once they returned to the beach and she looked like nothing could have made her happier than to have vanilla all over her mouth and chin. At his surprise, she had asked Dean to carry her on their way to the beach. He had accepted of course, he just wasn't expecting the little girl to ask such a thing, Castiel didn't seem that astonished though.

Sam and Jess joined them soon enough. It was obvious that Sam was proud to have Jess at his arm, Dean could understand the feeling; he was also damn proud to have Castiel, whenever he caught someone looking at his future husband, he enjoyed the envy. She was wearing a white bikini and her pregnancy was even more obvious. Claire looked at her again, quite fascinated while Jess sat on her towel with a satisfied sigh.

"I think I will sunbath a bit."

"You don't want to go with me?"

"I'll join you soon. For now, I need to just lay down."

"Okay."

With one last kiss to his wife, Sam went to the water. Claire went to run off to go swim as well and her dad followed her. Dean first thought of joining them but he looked down at Jessica who was relaxing. It was a good occasion to talk to her.

"Mind if I sat with you?"

"No, go ahead."

He just seemed surprised by this. He did sat by her side and looked at his little brother, and searched for a subject of conversation. Maybe he should start with something more basic?

"We were talking about a destination for our Honeymoon yesterday, where did you two go?"

"We went to Cuba, it's beautiful! One day we would like to go to Japan as well, but maybe later when the baby will be born." She had a smile while saying that, her hands caressing her belly.

"Yeah, so they can see it. That's why Cas' didn't want to go to Egypt for now, he wanted to discover it with Claire. So we decided to go to Greece."

"Oh yeah, that's would be wonderful too!"

A short silence settled between them, until Jessica broke it.

"You really wanted to talk to me about that?"

"No, I just didn't want to be too direct…I wasn't sure how to ask, but do you still hate me?"

She hesitated, even though she had resolved her feelings, she wasn't sure how to spell those out. "I did at a time, at the beginning. I couldn't understand why your dad and you disliked me that much. At first, I thought the two of you were snobs, that you didn't want someone poorer. But eventually, Sam told me…"

Dean frowned: what was she talking about?

"He told me about that woman: Veronica."

This was like a punch in the stomach to hear such a name. Veronica…

"He told you about that?!" He wasn't angry, just shocked.

She nodded silently and caressed her belly again, but with no smile. "I understood you were being overprotective, not snobbish. I don't say I have no resent left, but I don't want that to linger. I want my baby to know their uncle, and I want Sam to see you."

He looked at the sea and felt the need to go back again to Castiel and Claire, yet he didn't want Jessica to think he was mad or something. He was touched to know she was willing to look over the past, but knowing she knew about what happened when they were kids…Well, he guessed that it was natural that Sam told her. And it was better that she could understand why John and Dean had reacted like that, even though they had been wrong. Would he have to tell Castiel? Well, probably, and it's not as if he had anything to be ashamed of! Then why did he feel like he was exposed lie a rat lab or something?

"When did he tell you?"

"After your father died. I know the two of you didn't talk much at his burial. Maybe you should fix that."

"Yeah…Thank you," he replied genuinely.

Veronica Vanni…Dear God, she was dead and yet she was still throwing a shadow over his life.

Okay, hope you liked it! The next chapter will come out sooner, I had difficulties with that one but the other is already half-written. Review, please!