A Broken Girl
Nora watched as Jaune rose up from the water. He shook the water out of his hair as he walked onto the sand beach. He turned towards her and Nora smiled back at him, waving at him.
The blond walked forward, dripping onto the sand as Nora held up a towel for him. He took it and wiped his face and hair, before speaking.
"Thought you would have joined me in the water by now."
"I wanted to, but Ren asked me to keep an eye on the stuff." Jaune nodded his head as he sat down beside her.
Neither said anything for a few moments. Jaune dried off his body as Nora looked off into the horizon. Then Jaune spoke.
"Nora, I know what you and Ren are doing. You're not exactly making it subtle." Nora nibbled on her cheek as she looked at the ground.
"To be fair, I'm as subtle as a grenade tied to a hammer. You know that."
Jaune nodded in agreement, before he asked, "You and Ren talk?"
"Eeyup."
"About me and Ruby?"
"Yep, yep."
"What did he tell you?"
"Everything you told him, I'm guessing," Nora shrugged. "So… She made you promise not to date her."
"Yep," he muttered. "So you trying to not so subtly push up together isn't going to help. I'm not going back on my word."
"But that's so… so dumb!" Nora argued. "You two would be so happy together." She scooted closer, before she gently took Jaune's arm in her hand. She turned him towards her, forcing their eyes to meet. "Can I ask you something?"
Jaune raised his brow as Nora mentally went over what she was about to say. She had never been very good at debating things, but she wanted to try and at least put together a decent argument. This was important.
If this is what it would take to make Jaune and Ruby happy, she'd do it "I've been thinking about this since yesterday, and I think I might know why you're so scared about dating Ruby."
Nora moved her hand down, and she gave it to Jaune. She left it in his grasp so he could squeeze her fingers if he needed to.
"It's about Pyrrha, isn't it?"
Nora expected to see something change in Jaune's eyes. He'd tear up, he'd look away, he'd tell her she was wrong, lying through his teeth. She expected him to pull his hand out from hers as she struck a nerve in his chest.
That's not what happened. Instead Jaune looked at her, and she saw pity in his eyes.
Once upon a time, many years ago, Jaune had to tell his little sisters that Santa Claus wasn't real. It was a hard lesson, but necessary.
He liked to think he was a pretty good big brother, offering whatever he had to to help them grow.
Sometimes that came out as support and patience. Other times that meant… grounding them.
Jaune wasn't sure what to say as Nora watched him, waiting for his response. When he did finally speak, he could see the shock in her eyes.
"Nora, how I feel about Pyrrha has nothing to do with this."
"Come on, Jaune. You can't tell me Pyrrha hasn't crossed your mind since we got here," Nora chuckled, and the blond almost couldn't bear to look her in the eyes. He flinched slightly as he felt her fingers tighten around his hand.
She was scared. She needed to be right, but he had to be honest.
"Maybe once or twice, but I think she's been crossing yours a lot more."
"What are you talking about?"
"I won't date Ruby because I made a promise, but Pyrrha and I broke up a long time ago, Nora. She's not going to come barging back into my life just like that," he sighed. "She's gone."
"But she's going to be here," Nora countered. "She's going to be at the wedding, Coco and Fox invited her."
Jaune felt his stomach being crushed in a vice. He wasn't sure what to say as Nora stared at him. His lips moved, but nothing came out as she let out a chuckle.
"Come on, Jaune. You know she'll be here. She wouldn't miss this for the world."
Yet all Jaune heard from her was a plea. Begging him to agree with her. Begging him to share her belief.
Jaune didn't say anything, and Nora's grip tightened again as her teeth grinded against one another. "Say something…!"
"Nora, I don't think Pyrrha's coming."
"She is." Nora's grip tightened around his hand. He tried not to show how badly it hurt. as she clenched her jaw.
"How is it that after everything we've been through, all we've done together, you're just willing to give up on her? She's one of us, we grew up together." Nora had to fight the urge to scream, shaking as the words flowed from her. "We were Team JNPR, remember? Jaune, Nora, Pyrrha, Ren. The four of us, sticking together through thick and thin, best friends forever."
"Nora, I-"
"How am I the only one who still remembers that?" she snarled.
"You're not, Nora," Jaune swore. "But Pyrrha hasn't even contacted us for years. No texts, no calls, nothing. She's left us behind for bigger things, and I know that sucks, but I… I accepted it a long time ago."
Nora shook her head, pulling her hand away from Jaune. He continued, trying to reach out to her as her nails dug into the palms of her hands.
"When was the last time she replied to you? Even if we both tried to contact her, she wouldn't answer."
"How can you say that?" Nora asked as her vision began to blur. Tears welling in the corners of her eyes as she glared at him. "You dated her. She loved you."
"And I loved her," Jaune confessed. "But I used to text her almost every day, and she never replied. Then every week. Then once a month. Not a single text back. Don't you think that means something, Nora?"
"I…" She was shaking. She shook her head side to side. "It means you gave up on her too easily."
If Nora could see straight, she'd see the hurt in Jaune's eyes. The flare of anger, of pain, and of regret… only for it all to vanish with a sigh. He shook his head.
"You're wrong," she spat.
"I… I hate the thought that I'll never see Pyrrha again. I spent nights crying, just wanting to see her again. I loved her, Nora, but I had to accept the fact that she's gone. So do you," Jaune pleaded.
Nora picked up a handful of sand, throwing it at Jaune. It was all her mind could think to do when faced with the blatant lies. Jaune shouted in pain, rubbing at his face with the damp towel he had as Nora shouted at him. "I can't believe you! I loved her too, she was like a sister to me! I-"
They both stopped. A familiar voice screaming. In pain? In anger? Nora wiped the tears from her eyes as Jaune wiped the sand from his. They both caught the same sight from the corner of their eyes.
Ruby ran past them, leaving them and the beach behind as Ren struggled to catch up with her.
Yang would compare watching Weiss talking to Ren like watching a train. At first it was an interesting, but ultimately normal thing to see them talk, but then she noticed the car parked on the tracks.
Disaster was imminent.
When Ren uttered that simple question, it was too late. The train hit the car, and Yang felt everything break apart.
"Uh, Ruby. Do you know what this dolt is saying?" Weiss wondered.
"No! I would never say that to Jaune. I don't know what he's talking about!"
For a moment. Just a single moment, Yang tried to run. She pulled their body, and Weiss' foot moved out from under her, almost making her fall.
She barely caught herself as she looked at her foot. "W-who did that?"
Yang should have spoken up. She should have said something. Her voice didn't come out as the alt shrank herself down into the smallest corner of Ruby's mind.
She had wanted so badly to be alive, but for the first time in her life, she wished she was dead.
"Ruby?"
"I don't know what you're talking about," Weiss parroted, brow wrinkling in confusion. "I never said that to him!"
"He said you did."
"Well, I didn't. Clearly Jaune is just making things up, and trying to slander me!" Weiss argued.
"So you're calling him a liar."
"Yes," Weiss' head, or rather Ruby's head, suddenly jerked, as if twisted by an invisible hand as Ruby's voice, not Weiss, shot out of their mouth. "No! I'm not calling him that!"
They hadn't switched, Yang realized from where she laid. Switching took a few seconds. It was quiet and subtle, not a sudden twist of their neck…
The sudden whiplash hit them like a bat to the head. They swayed in place, trying to hold their head with one hand. A stinging sensation shot through each of them as Ren raised his brow.
"Ruby?" Yang had never heard her own voice sound so tiny and meek. She sounded so small. A flicker of a candle to a flood of emotions.
What was she supposed to do? Confess the truth? Here and now? How was she supposed to do that…?
"Jaune said you did," Ren replied matter-of-factly. "He said you told him that you didn't want to date him, and if you ever tried anything, to stop you. It was when you two went to that club together."
Yang wanted to scream. She wasn't sure what to say. What can you do when your dirty laundry comes flying out in everyone's face? Really, all she could do was shut up and take it, even as her stomach twisted.
Oh. Right. She didn't have a stomach.
"Club?" Weiss repeated, before her head twitched and Ruby's voice came out of her lips.
"But I didn't-" Her eyes widened. It was obvious, wasn't it? Only one part of her ever went to the club. "Yang?" Ruby uttered, shaking as she stared right through the confused Ren. "Yang, what… What did you do?"
"What did you do?!" Blake roared and Yang felt like she was suffocating.
"I'm sorry, Ruby," Yang cried as Ren called out to her. Yang bit their lower lip as she tried to take control, tried to pull Ruby to safety, only to feel nothing as their body began to tremble. They were panting, and all they heard was the pounding of their heart.
"Ruby? Who's Yang? Ruby?" Ren's questions went unanswered. "Ruby, what's wrong?" His concern fell on deaf ears as Ruby's mind cracked.
The young woman was looking right through Ren. Yang felt their heart racing as their throat tightened. She felt sweat trickling down their body as they felt hot. Burning inside as Ruby embraced herself.
She squeezed her head between her hands, digging her nails into their scalp as she gasped for air. A cold sweat covered her body as her muscles tightened up. They pressed their arms against their body, trying to make themselves as small as possible as Blake's voice was nearly drowned out by the drumming of four hearts.
"She's having a panic-!"
"Attack...!"
Ren jumped as Blake's voice fell out of Ruby's mouth.
She saw Ren's hands reach for her, and her eyes widened as she pulled away from him. They couldn't breathe. They were choking. They gasped for air as their chest felt like it was splitting open. Their heart was pounding against their ribs as their hands couldn't stop shaking.
Yang tried to take control, to center themselves, but Ruby wouldn't let go. Like two different hands on the steering wheel, the body jerked side to side, before one of them screamed, "Leave me alone!"
They couldn't feel their nails digging into their skin. They couldn't think as the air became thick and hard, caught halfway down their throat.
It was hard to see. Couldn't see out of Ruby's eyes. Face felt hot and wet as everything began to spin. Weiss ran, pushing Ren out of the way. He grabbed Blake's arm, and Yang screamed, tearing Ruby from his grasp.
He was going to put them away. He knew. He knew they were crazy, and he was going to lock them away like mom. They had to run. They had to leave. Anywhere, but here.
Their jaw clenched. Teeth grinding against one another. Something was trying to hold them down, pressing down on their chest, choking them as slivers of air found their way into their lungs.
Their whole body was tightening, like a can being crushed in the tight grip of a giant. Their heart was pushed into their throat, cutting off their airway with every breath.
They could feel it pounding just inside their neck, every beat almost deafening.
Weiss ran as Ruby's nails dug into Blake's skin. There might have been blood on them. Like their mother's blood on dad's hands. Yang didn't want to think about it as they pushed someone else out of the way.
They ran right off the beach and into Patch, but nothing looked right. The streets, the signs, nothing was the way it should have been.
Dad was after them. He knew they weren't well. That Ruby was sick. They were going to die next to Ruby's mom, wrapped up in a straitjacket.
Blake's legs moved as Ruby's eyes darted inside Yang's skull. Their naked feet hit the hard, stony ground, carrying them down streets they had never seen before as strangers surrounded her. Weiss kept running, unwilling to be caught, knowing what would happen to them if they were.
They had to get somewhere safe.
They had to get away.
Ruby ran, Blake ran, Weiss ran. They ran until their legs gave out and they looked around a street they didn't recognize.
Were they in Patch? No, nothing looked like Patch. There were palm trees and sand and stores they had never seen before.
Blake asked if they were in Vale, and but they had never been to Vale. They wanted to. Mom loved Vale.
But mom wasn't here. She was gone, but Ruby couldn't remember why.
Four minds, each of them breaking, clinging to one another, desperate for safety. Someone tried grabbing them. Ruby pulled away.
"L-leave me alone!" she choked out of Yang's throat. Who was that? Why were they here? Where was she supposed to go when she didn't even know where she was?!
Even beyond the pounding of their hearts, all there was were passing voices and roaring cars. Too loud to be Patch. Where were they?
They couldn't speak. They could barely breathe. Their throat felt like it was being crushed, their chest felt like it was in a vice. Nothing looked familiar, and they weren't sure where home was anymore. Their breathing was loud and erratic as they pushed through the crowd, gasping for air.
There were faces in the crowd. None of the girls could describe them. Just rivers of faceless people sliding past her.
Four hands laid on the same mind, each trying to direct it, each trying to push it somewhere safe. Ruby dragged her feet as she kept her eyes down on the ground. She couldn't hear anything over the drumming of her heart.
"Ruby?" The voice was muffled, almost like it was trying to speak to her through a wall. She saw someone was in front of her. Blake went around them, but they kept pace with Ruby, walking beside Weiss. "Hey, I'm talking to you."
They didn't know this voice. Did they?
"Don't ignore me." They stopped, and they knew Adam had found them. A whimper slipped out of their mouth, looking for an escape as their father prepared to throw them away.
"Do you know where you are?" No. Ruby shook her head as she squeezed her eyes. They didn't know where they were… "Do you know where you're going?" Yes, to an insane asylum. Locked in a straitjacket, left all alone with only themselves for company.
Just like mommy.
"Hey, can you hear me?" Weiss flinched. She expected to feel Adam's hand on her cheek. The way the others spoke about him, she readied herself to be hit, but nothing happened. She trembled in place, squeezing her eyes shut as they heard the voice near them.
"Look, I can take you to the hotel. You can sit in my room until you're, uh… better?" Hotel room? A room to stay in, but who was this talking to them? So hard to think, especially with the loud pounding between their ears.
Her eyes darted up, then fell back to the ground. They gave a glancing look, but their minds couldn't find a name to the face. A brunette with purple eyes. Who was he? Their fingers curled into their hands, digging into their palms as they rooted their feet into the ground.
"My name's Cardin. We met before, remember?"
No. They didn't. Cardin seemed to hear their thoughts as he looked at something she couldn't see. She followed his eyes, and all they saw were people staring at her, knowing they were broken.
She wished they'd stop.
"Do you want to go somewhere quiet?" he asked. She nodded her head. She wasn't sure who was nodding. "Alright. Follow me."
He motioned her to follow him, before he looked at the people staring. Ruby watched him lift up his middle finger at them, before motioning them away with his arm. They stopped staring as Cardin waved her closer.
"Come on. We can go somewhere quiet. Do you want that?"
Yes. Stop this fucking pounding between her ears. Four hearts pounding against their ear drums, each of their voices broken, all screaming with her voice.
"Alright. Come on. We're going through the lobby of the hotel we're all at. You remember why we're here?"
No. Because they wanted to leave Patch behind? Start new in mom's hometown…?
"It's a wedding. You're Jauney boy's plus one for Coco and Fox's wedding. He was invited, and he brought you along to Hawaii. You all came from Vale."
"Jauney boy?" Blake repeated.
"Jaune. Jaune Arc? Blond, blue eyes, scrawny?"
Jaune. That sounded familiar. "Jaune." The word felt nice on her tongue, and Weiss focused on his name as she followed Cardin, keeping her eyes on his back and trying to ignore everything else. She heard their feet hit the ground, and she tried to match his pace perfectly, letting it slowly replace the drumming of their heart. "Jaune."
They left Vale. They… they didn't live in Patch anymore. No, they lived in Vale, and that was where they met Jaune.
There was a metallic ding, loud and right in Yang's ear as she almost jumped out of Weiss' skin. She turned her head to see a metal door opening, and the room was so small, a prison for her until she could be brought to her cell. Their heart began to race again, but Cardin drew her attention back to him.
He stood right in front of her, blocking her view of the small, metal room.
"We aren't going in there. We're taking the stairs. Are you okay with us taking the stairs?"
Stairs. Like their apartment. They had to climb up the stairs once because the elevators were broken. Mr. Port offered to help them. They remembered that. They nodded their head as Cardin walked beside her.
"Easy. One step at a time. Just like breathing. One thing at a time. Left, right, in, out."
Breathe with her steps. Left, right. In, out. Weiss kept her breathing even as her throat slowly began to expand, taking in air again, before breathing it back out.
"How about we walk a little slower? Left, right. In, out." They ran out of stairs, but they knew the pattern by heart as they breathed in and out.
It was a long walk. Cardin didn't stop talking. He described the world around her. Little sensations. "Feel our feet hitting the ground. The carpet's soft, right? A-and the colors." He motioned to the patterns underneath their feet. "Yellow, and red. Good colors. Uhh, think that's maroon."
As he described her surroundings, Blake watched him take off his shoe. He placed his foot on the ground, gently rubbing it into the fibers. She blinked, before glancing down and watching the red and yellow lines swirl around each other.
"And your breathing," he added. "Feel the cold air traveling past your lips?" He took in a slow, deep breath as Weiss watched him. "It's cold, right?" They took a deep breath.
Yes, it was. Cold in their lungs. Cold on their lips. Then when they breathed out, it was warm and hot.
"Feeling this cold, metal railing." He placed his hand on it, sliding his fingers along it as he walked. "Cold, hard metal."
Yang's finger tapped on the faded, gold pole. She grabbed it, squeezing her fingers against it until they turned white. Then Weiss slid her fingers along, following Cardin up the stairs.
He described the faint sounds of the elevators, the tapping of their feet against the ground, the sights, sounds, and smells around them until they finally came to a door.
They came to a door, and Cardin opening it, motioning her inside. Her feet felt like cinderblocks as she stared inside, waiting for someone to push her in.
No one did.
Cardin looked at her, and said, "You can go in if you want, Ruby, or we can stay out here."
It didn't matter. The choice was theirs. Hers. She glanced at him with silver eyes, and he seemed to understand her. He stepped in first, standing in the room. Now he couldn't slam it closed behind them.
She stepped inside, and he let her close the door. Now they were all in the same room, but she could leave if she wanted. She looked around the room. It felt… familiar. It felt very familiar, but there were more beds in this room than hers.
They walked over to the bed, sitting down on it as Cardin took a deep breath and sighed. He sat on the other bed and Ruby watched him as he scratched his head.
"Oh, hey. Uh, good job breathing," he muttered, glancing at her as he took out his phone.
Good job… That was good. He was right, that was good. Their breathing was steady, no more racing heart, just… just them.
Yang was the first to finally hear her own thoughts again. The others needed time, leaving her in the driver seat as they rested in the silence.
She tried to take full control of the body again, nibbling on her bottom lip as she expected the others to snap at her.
Nothing.
It was like moving through sludge, at first. Their mind felt so tired, like it had just ran a mile. They were sweaty, muscles sore as Yang focused on her breathing. Her eye twitched as she continued to trudge through it, until she felt fingers beginning to twitch.
Yang took her first breath, before Cardin glanced at her. "How you feeling?" he asked, but the alt didn't answer.
This room was virtually identical to the room Ruby and Jaune were sharing. Some vaguely different paintings, a different view through the window, and two beds… Yang shook her head as she placed a hand on her chest, feeling their heartbeat.
"Fuck," Yang panted, rubbing a hand through her hair.
"That bad, huh?" Cardin chuckled, only to lean back as Yang's eyes glared at him.
"Shut up. Just… just shut up," she growled.
"Alright. Christ. You want anything or-?" Yang's fingers dug into the bed sheets and Cardin's lips fell shut. He shook his head, standing up and walking away as he left Yang within her sister's body.
Within her… host's body?
Yang wasn't even really sure what to call what she and Ruby had anymore. They weren't sisters. She was an illness, a glitch in Ruby's mind given a voice. The young woman buried her face in her hands, not even noticing that Cardin was tapping away on his phone.
Jaune tried to keep up with Ruby, but the smaller girl was unbelievably fast. He looked around, desperate to see a trace of her distinct, red hair, any sign of her trail, but no. There was no sign of her.
"Ruby? Ruby!" He turned around, and he found Ren standing behind him. "What happened?! Where's she going?"
"I-I don't know." Ren's face typically didn't contort this way. His worry and concern was clear, but it mixed with confusion and guilt. His eyes turned and twisted, looking for a sign of her, but he shook his head. "I don't see her…"
"Well she's got to be out here somewhere! Look, go grab Nora, I'm going to go this way. You two go that way, and text me if you find her." Jaune's legs started moving before he was even done speaking. Ren's eyes widened as he watched his friend run away.
"Jaune, wait!" But he just kept moving, leaving Nora and Ren behind to find her...
He ran and searched until he felt his lungs ache. He had no direction, no idea where to even begin his search, but he had to find Ruby.
He replayed the events prior to her scream through his mind, but none of it made sense. He didn't know what made Ruby act the way she did, but he wanted to help her. He needed to, just like he needed to be by her side.
Don't stop, he told himself. Even as beads of sweat slid down his skin, even as his lungs burned, he ran, until he heard it.
His phone was ringing, and he beamed as he took it out and answered the call. Why hadn't he thought about calling her? The question was quickly crushed under Jaune's desire as he answered the phone.
"Ruby?"
"Jaune?"
Velvet? He hadn't even checked the ID. Jaune dragged a hand against his face as he sighed. "I'm sorry, Velvet, I have to go. I-"
"It's Ruby. She's in my room with Cardin back at the hotel. He said she's… she's acting really weird."
"I'm on my way," Jaune replied. He told Velvet goodbye, before he ended the call and ran once more. His body begged him to slow down, but he knew he had to move.
He ran back to the hotel, only realizing what Velvet had said when he was inside one of the elevators. Velvet had said Cardin was with her, and Jaune shook his head as the idea stupefied him.
What the hell was Cardin doing with her…? Why was she with him? Was he going to hurt her? He swore, if Cardin harmed her, he'd break that bastard's arm!
As soon as the doors opened, Jaune slipped out. Velvet had texted him the room number, so it was easy to find. What wasn't easy to see was finding Cardin standing outside a door, waiting for him. He turned his head to find Jaune approaching him, but he didn't move.
"Is she in there?" he asked, glancing at the door behind Cardin.
"Yeah." Jaune reached for the door knob, only for Cardin to stand in the way. "I'm not in the mood, Cardin," he growled.
"Aww, so sorry. Is this not convenient for you?" the taller man asked, and Jaune balled his hands into fists.
"I want to see her. I just need to make sure she's okay."
"Well, she ain't. Bitch had a panic attack," Cardin muttered. "Probably would have walked into traffic if I didn't grab her."
"If you hurt her-"
"Calm the hell down, Jauney boy. I didn't do anything. I'm just letting you know she might still be a little freaked out. She seemed a lot calmer when I asked her if I could step out, but still. Takes a while to get over a panic attack."
Cardin stepped aside, letting Jaune through, but he didn't move. The shorter man looked at his former bully.
"A panic attack…? How did you know how to help her? Why did you-?"
"I've seen it before. Women, right?" Cardin laughed, earning another glare from Jaune. "Don't worry about it, Arc. Just go and make sure your little girlfriend is okay." He motioned him to go, and Jaune didn't waste anymore time.
Inside the room, Jaune found Ruby staring at him like a deer in headlights. He wasn't sure what to say. He wasn't even sure what a panic attack was, really. He just knew he had to be here for her.
He gulped, before he put on a smile and waved at her. "H-hey." Seriously…? "You… you okay?" Obviously she's not okay! Damn it… Jaune tried not to let the regret show on his face as he walked over, staring into Ruby's silver eyes.
There was something off about them, he realized. It wasn't an obvious difference. The shine was different. The shade of silver. Ruby felt off… Maybe it was the thin frown on her lips. The way she stared at him with… distrain? Like she was mad at him?
"Oh. Hey, Jaune." She didn't sound happy to see him.
"Ruby, I… What happened back there? Did I do something? Did Ren?"
She didn't react to the question at first. She just stared at him, watching him. She turned her head away, and he could hear her voice mumbling a reply. "No. I did."
"Can we talk about it? I mean, d-did Ren say something? Or was it Nora? What happened?"
"Jaune, just shut up and listen, alright?" His lips fell shut and he obeyed. "I fucked up, alright? I made a huge mistake, and I want you to know I'm sorry."
Her voice was lower than normal. Just a side effect of running her voice raw with that scream? Jaune shook the questions from his mind as he stepped closer, standing before Ruby.
"What do you mean?" he asked, and Ruby sighed again.
"Do you remember that night you, me, and Neon when clubbing? What I said to you afterwards?" Ruby asked, and Jaune nodded his head as he felt his heart race.
Was she really going to take back what she had said? He wouldn't lie, part of him was happy to hear that, but why did she scream? Why did she have a panic attack? What was going on?
"Well, I never should have said that. I know that I… I was just being selfish."
"Selfish? Ruby, I know I haven't known you for long, but you've never been selfish," Jaune replied. "You're one of the nicest, most selfless girls I've ever met. You're awesome!"
His words seemed to have the opposite intended effect. Rather than cheer her up, Ruby's mood only seemed to worsen as she buried her face in her hands.
"Y-yeah," he heard her voice mumble. "I-I guess I am pretty awesome."
"Ruby, what's wrong? I want to help you."
The dark-haired girl wiped her eyes, brushing the start of tears from her face. She took a deep breath, before she looked up at Jaune with determined, almost sharp eyes. "You can help me by asking me out."
"W-what?"
"Look, Jaune, you like… me, right?" Ruby inquired, raising her brow.
"Uh, w-well-"
"Ask me out then." Jaune turned his eyes away, blushing as he combed his fingers through his hair. His embarrassment briefly turned to confusion as he heard Ruby mutter something under her breath. "You two are meant to be..."
"What did you say?"
"I said, ask me out. On a date. I like strawberries, and cookies, and flowers are nice, but not necessary, lover boy," Ruby chuckled, though her voice carried a bitterness with it. "Anywhere's fine, even somewhere cheap for a first date."
The young man almost couldn't believe what he was hearing. He glanced at her, and he was surprised to see she wasn't really blushing that much. A faint, subtle shade of red on her cheeks, but nothing more.
Her bright, silver eyes were so dull. Like she barely believed what she was saying. His brow wrinkled as he slowly sat down beside her. She didn't push him away, so he took that as a good sign.
"Just promise me something?" Ruby muttered, aiming her eyes on the ground. He moved closer, and she turned her face away, refusing to even look at him.
"Of course…"
"Treat me right, okay?" Ruby's voice wavered, and Jaune reached a hand out to her. She pulled away once more, gritting her teeth as if she wanted to insult him.
Was she mad at him? Did she even want to date him? Jaune felt his stomach twist as his and Ruby's eyes met. There was rage and pain in her silver orbs as glared at him. Nothing like the way they'd stare at each other before.
He didn't understand it, and he could only sit and listen as Ruby continued. "Watch my back, take care of me, accept me… Love me, and don't you dare break my heart," she growled. "Or else I'll… I'll kick your ass, blondie."
It sounded like she was giving him permission to ask her out at this point...
Maybe she was trying to hide the bitterness in her voice, but she failed on every account. He could hear her broken heart, and Jaune shook his head as he finally spoke.
"I'm not going to ask you out, Ruby. I made-"
"Are you shitting me?" she growled, nearly standing up. Jaune stepped back, eyes wide as the short and sweet lady he knew looked ready to kill. "I am literally throwing myself at you! Don't reject me!"
"You told me to reject you!"
"Well, I'm changing my mind!" Ruby buried her face in her hands, sighing, before looking up at him. "I know you'll treat me right, so just… date me."
He sighed in reply, rubbing his brow. "Ruby, I… Is this some kind of weird mind game, or something? Or a joke? Because it isn't funny."
"I'm not joking. I'm trying to ask you out!"
"Then why do you sound so pissed off?" he asked with a raised brow.
"I'm just… I… I'm pissed," she muttered. "I'm just pissed, and I can't take it out on anyone, but myself."
"Ruby…" Jaune stepped forward and sat down on the bed. He was right next to her now, and she stared at him as he reached around her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Talk to me."
"Trust me, Blondie. I'd love to," she mumbled. "I… I'm sorry for what I said. About dating me."
"It's okay-"
"No, it isn't. God." Ruby rolled her eyes. "What the hell is wrong with you? A girl insults you to your face, and you pretend it's all hunky-dory? Come on."
"... That same girl is now trying to get me to date her, and honestly? She could be doing better," Jaune commented, staring blankly at her.
"Y-yeah. Fair enough," she muttered. "Look, I've just done some thinking, and I realized I was wrong. I was really wrong… I was selfish," she confessed. "I wanted to pretend things were perfect just the way they were, that I could avoid change."
Jaune watched as Ruby's silver eyes stared at a nearby wall. She took a deep breath, before sighing. "I thought that I was fine just being me, and that was all anyone needed. All I ever needed to be. I was so fucking stupid…"
"Ruby, don't talk like that." He lifted his hand off her shoulder and reached for her hand. She watched their fingers brush against one another, before gently squeezing her hand. "You're not selfish, or stupid."
She squeezed his hand in return, tightening around them as their eyes. "Jaune, I… I've made some terrible mistakes in my life. Because I was angry, or scared, or… or jealous. I've been really stupid. I just… I want you to forgive me. I want to take back what I said, and I want you and… me to live happily ever after."
Part of Jaune felt happy. Overjoyed, even. A chance to try and finally date the girl of his dreams? It sounded amazing, and part of him wanted to kiss Ruby right there, but he couldn't.
Her eyes looked so dull and grey. She was lying through her teeth, and no matter how much Jaune liked Ruby, he could tell she didn't feel the same. Not yet. Maybe not ever.
"Ruby, I… I like you a lot, but we can't-"
"Oh, come on!" Ruby groaned. She stomped her foot against the ground, glaring at him again. "What's wrong with me? I'm smart, I'm nice, and I know you've been checking me out when I'm not looking." Jaune's eyes widened at that, his cheeks turning red slightly as she stared at him. "Just give me a chance! Please?"
She seemed to hesitate for a moment, before she placed her hands on his shoulders. She leaned closer, letting Jaune feel her warm breath on his cheek as she stared into his eyes. His eyes widened as she trembled slightly, swallowing down spit as he felt her fingers dig into his skin.
Was… was she going to kiss him?
"Ruby-"
"Look me in the eyes, Jaune. Do you… do you like me?"
"Y-you're my fri-"
"You know what I mean."
Jaune gulped, staring into her eyes. The question danced in his mind, but he ignored it to stare at her grey eyes.
'Desperate.' That was the word she had used to describe dating him, and that was the best word to describe her now. Jaune felt his stomach twist as he wondered if dating him was really that bad. He placed his hands on her shoulders, trying to push her away, though she was deceptively strong.
"Maybe we should just drop this. I came to help you. You still haven't told me about what happened between you and Ren? Are you okay? What-?"
"Ruby?" The dark-haired woman blinked, turning her head to stare at nothing. Jaune raised his brow, clearly confused as he saw tears pool in the corners of her eyes. "Ruby, wait, I-I can explain, I-" Her arms fell limp and her head hung low on her neck.
"Huh?" Ruby took a deep breath, before going still. Jaune blinked, shaking her slightly. "Ruby? Ruby, what's wrong? I'm here, I-"
"Why?" She fell against him, shaking as the tears fell freely. She was sobbing in Jaune's arms as her voice whimpered through the tears. "Why, Yang...?"
Jaune had never heard that name before. He wasn't sure what to say as he followed Ruby's eyes, but all she was doing was staring off into nothingness. "Ruby, who-?"
Her voice cut him off as she shouted at the walls of the room. "Just admit it! It's true, isn't it? That's why Jaune didn't kiss me. That's why he...he..." Ruby was crying again, clutching Jaune as she buried her face against his chest. She squeezed her eyes shut as she trembled in his arms.
What was he supposed to do? Jaune had no idea what Ruby was talking about, and his confusion only grew as he listened to her.
"Protect me?!" Ruby bitterly replied to the silence. "How?! You lied to me, to Jaune! I trusted you, a-and you just manipulate my life! My friend's lives! How was any of it to protect me?!"
"Ruby, I-" Jaune might as well have been talking to a brick wall as Ruby continued to scream, her voice dripped with rage and blame. His arms twitched, ready to release her, but something held his arms firmly around her body.
Fear? Concern? Love…? He wasn't sure.
"Then I should have made the choice myself. Not you! This is my life, Yang!" Ruby was silent. Her hands were shaking as her teeth nearly cracked against one another. "I just don't get it, Yang. Why did you do this?"
Jaune waited for Ruby to say something. Nothing came out of her beyond whimpers and hiccups as she laid in his arms, crying. Her legs crawled onto the bed as she laid beside him, resting on him.
He held her in his arms, chewing on his bottom lip as he tried to think of what to say. He wasn't sure what could be said, though. Ruby continued to cry in his arms as he held her, and eventually Jaune spoke a meager whisper into her ear.
"It's okay, Ruby… It's okay."
"Jaune?" Her broken voice croaked, and her shaking only got worse as he held her. "P-please, let me go. I-I have to go, I-"
Hearing her sound so desperate to get away from him broke his heart, but Jaune had been left with too many questions now. No more. He wanted answers.
He had reached the end of his rope, and he spoke softly, yet firmly. "Ruby, I'll let you go, but I'm not letting you leave this room. Not until I have answers." A plea slipped out of his mouth as he nuzzled her head with his. "Please…"
True to his words, he released her, slowly, and he watched as she stood on shaky legs.
"Ruby, what… what is going on?" he asked, begging for something, anything to help understand.
"Jaune, I… I never wanted you to find out like this. Yang, she told you-"
"Who is Yang?"
Ruby looked at the pillows on the bed. She scooted closer to them, taking one and clutching, squeezing it in her hands as she gasped for air and rubbed at her teary eyes. She quietly replied, "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I really am, Jaune."
He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He had heard her apologize, but he still needed answers. He swallowed spit down as Ruby finally continued.
"Do you remember that night…? I tried to kiss you, and… and you rejected me. Because Yang told you to."
Jaune's brow furrowed as he asked, "I don't understand. You told me not to-"
"It wasn't me. Not… not really," she mumbled, and Jaune was only more confused. "Do you remember what I told you about my mom?"
"Yeah, she was thrown in an asylum because-" She was crazy…? "-of your dad?"
"Dissociative. Identity. Disorder," Ruby slowly uttered. Jaune just tilted his head, clearly not understanding the words, but from how Ruby was speaking, it didn't sound good. "My mom had it, and… and so do I."
"A-are you okay? Does it hurt? I mean, what is it?" Jaune questioned.
Ruby looked ready to spill blood from her own lip by the way she was biting it, but she kept going, even as Jaune's confusion seemed to rub salt in her wound. "Ever since I was a little kid, I've… heard voices in my head."
Jaune's eyes widened and he moved on reflex, leaning back, away from Ruby's side. It was such a small gesture, one that he didn't even think about, but he knew Ruby caught it, and the pain in her eyes was clear.
She didn't seem to blame him, but she turned her eyes to the pillow as he quietly apologized. "I'm sorry. I was just…" He didn't bother trying to justify it. He just kept moving, taking a deep breath as he asked the obvious question. "Do these voices tell you to do stuff?"
"It's not like that, Jaune. They're not like slasher villains or something. They're not telling me to be evil or to kill anyone. Their names are Weiss, Blake, and Yang."
"They have names?"
"They're my family." Ruby looked at him, staring into his eyes. "I grew up with them, Jaune. They're my sisters. When dad put mom away, they were there for me. When Adam broke my heart, they were there for me. They're my family, Jaune."
He nodded his head, but honestly, he had no idea how to reply. He thought with answers, his confusion would have faded away. Instead it only seemed to grow as he scratched at his head.
"Okay, so these voices in your head… One of them told me not to date you. How…?"
"Sometimes… I let them control my body." Jaune had no idea how to reply to that. He stared at Ruby, and she buried her face in the pillow, avoiding his blank stare.
The room was silent, and the young man quickly tried to fill it. "Oh. Okay. So that time we went out dancing with Neon."
"You were with Yang. You picked up Blake in your car, and you went to the library with Weiss. You've… you've spent more time with them than you'd think…" Ruby wanted to laugh, but all that came out was a small sniffle.
"Oh." Jaune wasn't sure if he should have apologized for never noticing, or if he should have felt some relief at the news. "I've noticed you acting weird, but I just chalked that up to you just being… you. I thought you were just quirky."
"Nope. Just… insane."
Jaune found his throat run dry as he opened his mouth. "So they're these… three voices in your head. And sometimes they have control of your body." Ruby cringed, clearly revolted with her own status. "And one of them went behind your back to make sure we wouldn't date each other?"
"They've never done stuff like this before, Jaune. Y-Yang's always been my best friend. She's the oldest of my alternative personalities, but... I don't know why she would do this."
He nodded his head in a quiet reply. "Maybe she was… worried about you? I mean, if Adam and your dad were both jerks, I guess you haven't had a lot of good male figures in your life."
"That doesn't justify it, Jaune!" she spat. "That doesn't make any of this okay. I'm a freak, and you found out in one of the worst, possible ways!" Ruby stood up, and Jaune watched her legs give out, making her fall back onto the bed. She groaned, clutching the pillow until it looked ready to pop.
"I know how this sounds, Jaune. I'm insane," she bitterly admitted. "I belong in an asylum, just like my mom.. I used to think I could pretend that I was okay, that I didn't need medication o-or a padded cell, but look at me!"
She threw the pillow across the room. It hit the wall and fell to the floor with a quiet thud as Ruby wiped the tears from her face. Her voice was hot with rage. He had never heard her speak like this before.
"A part of me went behind my back, lied to me, and manipulated you! I really do belong in a cell. I'm a freak," she muttered. "A disgusting, stupid freak. I-I trusted Yang, and-"
She felt Jaune's hand on hers, and she blinked. She glanced at him and she found him sitting in front of her. He squeezed her hand, and she returned the gesture, quietly sniffing.
"Ruby, I… I can't even begin to try and understand what you're going through. But you're my friend, and I don't think you're a freak."
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"It's okay. It's alright. I'm here for you," he replied.
"Jaune, you can't fix me," she mumbled. "Other people have tried…"
Fix her? He couldn't imagine how to start doing that… or even if he should have. What right did he have to tell Ruby how to live? How to deal with this… problem? Then again, it was clear how in pain she was. Jaune pushed it all aside, and he focused on her. "I just... I want to help you."
Ruby said nothing, but she didn't reject his help or pull away, so he pushed forward. "So… Yang's this alternate identity?"
"Alternate personality," she mumbled. "I call them 'alts' for short."
"An alt. Okay," he nodded his head. "And she's the one who told me not to date you."
She nodded her head. "S-she was the first alt I had. She's been me for as long as I can remember. She's my best friend, my sister, but I can't believe she went behind my back like this."
Jaune nodded his head in return. "Family's… complicated," he confessed. "I know I've had fights with my sisters before."
"Your sisters don't live in your head," she bitterly remarked.
"Jaune opened his mouth, only to close it again. He didn't say anything, before he simply gave her hand another squeeze. "You're not a freak, Ruby. You're different, but you're definitely not a freak. You're my friend."
"You don't want to be friends with me," she warned, but Jaune held her hand tightly as he shot that notion down.
"Bullshit," he replied. "I do. I still do! Ruby, you're my friend. You don't just stop being friends because things get hard."
Ruby glanced at his hand, before she quietly muttered, "So where do we go from here? Still friends, or…more?"
"Ah…"
"That was what this was about, right? Yang didn't want us to date for whatever reason. So do we, or…?" Her cheeks were red, but their eyes met as she raised her brow.
Jaune's eyes widened, and despite everything the two had gone through, his face immediately felt hot. His already knotted stomach grew tighter as he cleared his throat. "Oh. Y-yeah. Um, well, let's say if Yang hadn't done anything. I-I mean, if that makes sense. She-"
"I tried to kiss you Jaune. That was me. All me."
"Ah. R-right. Yeah, that… that did happen." Jaune scratched at the back of his head as he took another deep breath.
If someone asked him this morning if he wanted to date Ruby, he would say yes. Well, maybe not, because of the promise he had made, but that was the thing. He made a promise, and he made sure to never break a promise to a friend.
But was he friends with 'Yang?' She was Ruby's alternate personality, but how much did the two really talk to one another?
The truth was he did want to date Ruby. She was cute, funny, beautiful, smart, and just all around fun to be around, but he never would have thought all those traits would come with the biggest piece of baggage he had ever seen.
Jaune wanted to help Ruby, really, he did, but would it be easier to help her as a friend? Easier for him, or her, he wasn't sure.
Could he kiss her, trust her, spend time with her with those 'voices' in her head? Voices that part of him even wondered really existed… No. He shook his head slightly. Ruby wouldn't lie about this.
"Jaune? You haven't said anything," Ruby quietly muttered. "You shook your head, does that mean you don't want-?"
"No! I mean, S-sorry. :Lost in thought. That's all." Jaune looked at Ruby, and he leaned forward. Ruby's eyes widened as their faces almost touched. Part of him wanted to hug her. Part of him wanted to kiss her.
He wondered if the same thoughts were going through her head.
The young man steeled himself, before he bit the bullet, staring right into those silver eyes he had fallen for. "Ruby, I'm going to be honest with you. With everything that's happened, I think I need some time to think. I need to process all of this."
The heartbreak in her eyes was clear, and it stabbed a knife right through his too. He hated himself for it, but this was for the best, he told himself. He needed time. He needed to think. This was a huge bombshell that was dropped on him, and he had no idea how to even begin to deal with it.
He waited for Ruby to shout at him, to hate him, but he felt a small wave of relief as she nodded her head. "I understand," Ruby mumbled. "You know, i-if you don't want to, you can just tell me. Save us both time."
Jaune's other hand touched her shoulder, and he gave her a soft squeeze as her eyes rose up to meet his. "I promise, Ruby, that I just need time to think this through, and you know I'm a man of my word."
Somehow, despite all they had gone through, Ruby found the strength to laugh. A giggle slipped out of her mouth as Jaune released her and opened his arms for a hug. Without saying anything, she leaned forward and embraced him, squeezing his body in a tight embrace.
"Can… I ask you something?" his voice tickled her ear. He felt her head nod against his chest, before he slowly popped the question. "What about you? Do you want to date me? Cause that's kind of a big deal. Cause you know… takes two to tango."
Ruby opened her mouth, before it fell shut. "I've never really been good at dancing," her muffled voice replied. "I… I think I might need some time too."
"That's fair."
The two nodded in agreement, before Jaune blinked. "Hey, can I ask you a question?" She nodded her head. "When I walked in, the person I was talking to. Was that one of your alts?"
"Yang," she answered. "Yeah…"
"The one I talked to at the club. Right." He nodded his head, replaying the conversation in his head. "She said that she's sorry. It doesn't really cover what she did, but I just thought you should know."
The two pulled apart, sitting on the bed together. Ruby nodded her head, but she didn't say anything. They sat in silence, before Ruby sighed.
"Ren told Weiss about what Yang did. We were so confused, a-and we had a panic attack," she mumbled. "I haven't had one of those in years. I feel so humiliated." She blinked, before glancing down at her two piece bikini. He caught her blush, before she pulled the blanket over her body. "And what I'm wearing doesn't exactly help."
Jaune glanced at his shorts, before smiling weakly. "Yeah, same." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. "I'm going to call Ren and Nora. Let them know I found you."
Ruby groaned loudly. "Ren and Nora… God, they must think I'm a freak. A-and how I reacted to Ren… I was awful," she sighed, and Jaune patted her back.
"Hey, it's okay. They'll be alright. I promise."
"Please," she begged. "Don't tell them?"
"I won't," he agreed, nodding his head. The idea of lying to his friends hurt, but this was huge. He didn't have any right revealing it without Ruby's permission. "But they're really worried about you."
"I'll… talk to them later," she promised.
He nodded in return, before he chewed on the inside of his cheek. "I think I should bunk with Nora and Ren for the night..."
Fear and worry quickly erupted onto her face. "What? No, Jaune, you don't have to, I-"
"I think it might be the best for both of us, or things will be really, really awkward in there tonight," Jaune confessed. "It's just one night for us to clear our heads."
"Yeah… I guess you're right," Ruby conceded with a sigh. "So we'll talk about it later?" He nodded his head in return, and she nodded back. "Can… you stay here for a bit longer? Please?" she whispered.
He nodded his head again, sitting by her side. Ruby didn't say anything as she pulled on the blanket, letting it wrap around her body, before she laid her head down on his shoulder. His eyes widened, his face growing hot, before he wrapped an arm around her.
The two rested against one another, sitting on the bed in silence as they wondered what they were now, and what tomorrow would bring. Neither were sure, both were scared, but they had each other. Their cards were on the table.
Only time would tell where they ended up.
Ruby opened her eyes to stare at the ceiling. It was night now, and she was alone. Jaune left to go be with his friends, leaving her alone in an empty and quiet room. She didn't move as Weiss and Blake's voices rang through her head.
"So, he knows?" Blake asked. Ruby nodded her head as Weiss sighed.
"What do we do now?" Silence. "Where's Yang…?"
Ruby had no idea, and honestly? She welcomed some space between her and her sister. Her eyes fell shut as she tried to just fall asleep, not caring what any of her alts had to say.
"We need to talk."
"Later," Ruby bitterly replied.
"No, Ruby. Now." Blake's voice was direct and firm, and Ruby opened her eyes again, glaring at the ceiling. "I know why Yang did what she did."
The young woman felt as if someone had just torn her right out of bed. She was awake and alert, and she sat up. She glanced at the spot where Jaune would be, before her eyes scanned the dark room. The moonlight bled into the room through the curtains, outlining just how empty it was.
She was all alone, and yet she knew she wasn't…
Blake took Ruby's quiet contemplation as a sign to continue. Ruby could hear the hesitation in the alt's voice as she asked a question. "What do you know about 'Integration?'"
END
I said this would be posted around two weeks, and here it is! The next chapter. The big reveal! I hope you enjoyed it.
A lot of things this chapter. Jaune and Ruby were obviously the focus, but Ren, Cardin, and Nora were all playing an important part. We'll be seeing the end of their arcs later. Like I've said before, 'Everyone has a story!' Also, Cardin's definitely a tough character to play with.
As soon as I knew I wanted to include him, I knew I had to make it good. Cardin being good has been done to death, right next to Cardin being a super psycho evil guy. I really wanted to get something good. He's definitely an ass, and the character treat him as such, but I write him as seeing some shit. He wouldn't kick a girl while she's down, at least.
He'd poke Jaune when he's down, though. Definitely. But not Ruby.
Nora is dealing with Pyrrha still not being there. Sadly, we have friends who we grow up with who we just... drift apart from. I like to think I have a decent reasoning as to why, but the why isn't important right now. Pyrrha's not here, and everyone else has accepted that. Except Nora.
And Ren's just trying to stay sane. Pray for him.
All these characters and more will be ready for your entertainment next chapter. The story will focus a bit on the other characters, before they help Jaune and Ruby finally get back together. Except the next chapter in around two weeks. Stay safe, and remember, you are loved. See ya next time!