Hello everyone! Thank you so, so much for 10,000 views! Some people may not think it's a big deal, but I never thought that many people would read this story . But anyway, onto the reviews.
Shiranai Atsune: Yay! Thanks, I'll try my best to!
Michael in Arizona: Thank you! Fred and George being prefects, er, let's not imagine that. That's probably why Professor Binns explained it in the book. Yep, take that Draco! Thank you.
loveemmawatsonandhermione: Because of time constraints, and they're also quite lazy
{Harry, Ron and Hermione are at the library, looking through books}
"Wait, but didn't Hermione tell us what the Polyjuice potion was in the common room?" Harry asked.
"Yeah, this seems to be like the next day or something," said Ron.
"But if it's the next day, shouldn't it be in our Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson?" Hermione added.
Hermione: Here it is: 'The Polyjuice Potion. Properly brewed, the Polyjuice Potion allows the drinker to transform himself temporarily into the physical form of another!'
"Er, but why are we grabbing the book on our own?" Harry asked.
"No… signed permission slip from Fraudhart?" Ron snorted. "Oh, I was wondering if I could keep it…"
"Shut up," Hermione mumbled, glancing over at Lockhart, who was sending dashing smiles into a mirror and hadn't heard Ron. He probably wasn't even properly watching the movie.
"But if we're already at the library, that means no Defence Against the Dark arts lesson, with me, ugh, re-enacting Fraudhart's adventures," Harry rolled his eyes.
"Oh my gosh, I so wish we could have seen that," Ginny grinned, Harry just scoffed and nudged her with annoyance.
Ron: You mean, Harry and I drink some of this stuff and we turn into Crabbe and Goyle?
"Well duh, aren't I going to say the ingredients and stuff?" Hermione asked the screen.
Snape turned on Hermione. "Don't tell me you made a Potion behind my back… stole ingredients from me and read that highly dangerous potion book?"
"Uh, well…"
"And I thought you were the brightest witch of your age," Snape sneered disapprovingly. "You did this in second year?"
"We… we managed," she said.
"Wait," Draco stared at Hermione, Harry and Ron sharply. "You managed? That means…"
Harry and his two best friends grinned wickedly.
Hermione: Yes.
"That short little dialogue didn't even happen," said Ron.
Ron: Wicked! Malfoy'll tell us anything!
"Ron, I thought you thought the plan sounded a bit dodgy," said Harry.
"I did in the common room, and then once we were in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom, Hermione was saying about the ingredients and I said I didn't think it was a good idea," said Ron.
"Well this has really changed your opinion on the idea, then," said Hermione, her eyes wide.
Hermione: Exactly. But it's tricky. I've never seen a more complicated potion.
"That's what I said, right after finding the Polyjuice Potion in the book," said Hermione.
"Except you said it was the most complicated potion you'd ever seen," said Harry. "So maybe now Ron's going to turn around and say he thinks it's not such a good idea?"
Harry: How long will it take to make?
"Guess not," said Ron, sighing. "That's what you said after Hermione said I was too chicken, then I said I'd do it."
"For the answer to your question, Harry, a long time," said Hermione.
Hermione: A month.
"Yes, but you said about the fluxweed needing to be on the full moon, the lacewing flies needing to be stewed for twenty-one days," said Harry.
"Er, you stewed flies? Made of lacewings?" Petunia was looking at them like they'd grown a third eye.
Ron snorted then they continued the movie.
Harry: A month? But if Malfoy is the heir of Slytherin... he could attack half the Muggle-borns in the school by then.
"Er, that's basically what I said," Ron said, raising his eyebrows. "And I didn't say if he's the heir of Slytherin."
"I think whoever like, chose what they say didn't like you very much, Ron…" Harry guessed.
"But if they didn't like him why not just keep him the way he is, not make him even worse?" asked Ginny.
"Wow, thanks Ginny." Ron rolled his eyes.
Hermione: I know. But it's the only plan we've got.
"And I basically said that, as well," said Ron.
"Yeah, you said it's the best plan we had, so full steam ahead," Hermione agreed.
"Only after seeing Hermione's angry look," Harry sniggered, earning a glare from both Ron and Hermione.
{A Quidditch match between Gryffindor and Slytherin. It's quite violent, then Slytherin scores.}
"Time skip to the game having already started?" Ron muttered. "Isn't it going to show like, the full game?"
"Yeah, and I guess it's not going to show me lying in bed for half an hour, then Wood giving us a pep talk," Harry added.
"It actually wasn't his usual that time," said Fred.
"This is the one — the big one!" George laughed. Wood just rolled his eyes.
Lee: Another goal for Slytherin! {He adds the points to Slytherin} They lead Gryffindor 90 to 30.
"Was that the score?" Hermione asked. "And didn't that bludger thing chase you around, Harry?"
"Yeah, it did," Harry said, confused. "It followed me from the very start of the game, and if Slytherin already have 90 points… wow, help us… then the bludger should definitely be chasing me by now."
"But eventually the score was Slytherin having sixty points to zero…" said Lee.
Slytherin player: Yeah! Yeah!
"I don't remember any of this from the game, but maybe they were cheering at the very start, or sometime when we didn't see?" Wood guessed.
"I dunno what we were doing," Flint shrugged, although he was sneering.
{The Slytherin team fly over Harry and we see Lucius Malfoy and Snape in the audience. Harry breaks and Draco flies up next to him.}
Draco: All right there, Scarhead?
"Wait! That's what Malfoy said to me just before the bludger came towards me the first time!" Harry cried.
"That means that bludger might attack us then," Draco said.
"Us?" Harry repeated. "That bludger attacked me, and only got close to you because you kept randomly talking to me."
Draco just sneered and shrugged.
{A bludger flies past Harry's head}
"Here we go!" George cried.
"About time!" Fred added.
Wood: Watch yourself, Harry!
"It was actually George who spoke, he said it was a close one," said Harry.
"Wow, so rude of them to take my line and give it to someone else, then change it up," George said, shaking his head sadly.
"Yeah, imagine that," said Ron.
{The Bludger heads back towards Wood.}
"Wow, that didn't happen," said Wood. "I was up defending the goal! I mean, that's sort of my job in the game."
"I know! George kept hitting the bludger towards Slytherin players before it kept coming back to me," said Harry.
"I mean, that's sort of my job in the game," George repeated nobly.
Harry: Wood, look out!
"But what the heck is Wood doing away from his goal post?" Fred laughed. "No wonder Slytherin is smashing us so badly."
Quite a few people laughed at this, especially Wood.
{The bludger zooms down and hits Wood's broom before pelting at Harry again.}
"Good thing that didn't happen," said Wood. "Otherwise we really would've been doomed!"
"I feel like all the dramatic things that happen in Quidditch always happen to our dad," James jr decided.
"You think?" Harry chuckled.
{He flies around the pitch and the bludger chases him.}
"Who would be so mean as to tamper with a bludger to try and kill Uncle Harry?" asked Rose, her voice quivering a bit.
"Oh, you'll see," Harry said, crossing his arms.
{He flies through a bunch of Slytherin students, who all step out of the way, screaming.}
"I don't think I flew through the audience," said Harry. "Fred and George wouldn't leave me alone."
"Hey, we were just trying to help you," Fred said grumpily. "But we left you alone eventually."
{The bludger follows him. Hagrid watches through binoculars.}
"You were watching me through binoculars?" Harry asked Hagrid.
"Maybe I was," Hagrid shrugged.
"Shouldn't the twins be trying to save me?" Harry asked.
Hagrid: Blimey! Harry's got himself a Rogue Bludger! That's been tampered with, that has!
"Er, it was me who said the bludger had been tampered with," said George, rolling his eyes.
"Wow, George it must be so annoying to have your line given to someone else," Fred snickered, glancing at Ron, who groaned loudly then resumed the movie.
Ron {Grabbing out his wand}: I'll stop it.
"Thanks, Ron you're a bloody legend!" Harry laughed. "You didn't stop it, did you?"
"Nope, I don't even remember doing this," said Ron.
Hermione: {Pushing his arm down} No! Even with a proper wand, it's too risky. You could hit Harry.
"Yeah I don't remember this, either," said Hermione.
"Always, always the sensible one, Hermione," Ron laughed.
"At least I'm sensible and follow rules, unlike… some people," said Hermione, smirking at him.
{Harry zooms through the stands, the bludger following him. He brakes across from Draco}
"I didn't go through the audience," said Harry. "And… shouldn't it be raining?"
"Oh, yeah! On top of all the problems the match brought us, we also had to deal with rain," George sighed.
"It was raining, pouring, the old man was snoring!" Fred sung.
"What? What is that?" George asked, looking up at his brother with confusion.
"Some muggle song about rain," Fred said. "In this place I went to, there were a lot of sad muggles who sung that."
Draco: Training for the ballet, Potter?
"In this the reason why I said that is confusing, in real life Potter looked like he was doing a stupid twirl," Draco sneered.
"Yeah, to dodge a bludger trying to kill me!" Harry sneered back.
{Then Harry sees the snitch next to Draco's ear.}
"Was it really next to my ear?" Draco wondered. "Why couldn't I hear it, then?"
"Because you're a total dumb-ass who can't process a sound that is right next to you," Ginny snarled, leaving Draco looking baffled as they continued the movie.
{The bludger comes back past the two boys.}
"Wait… at this point, shouldn't it be hitting my arm?" Harry asked. "Because I saw the snitch, then stayed still to make sure Malfoy didn't see it, then when the bludger came back it hit my arm…"
"Maybe your arm isn't going to get hit?" Ron suggested.
"It has to! Otherwise, the news of the chamber being opened won't happen, and that was a pretty important moment of second-year," said Harry.
"Pretty cool way for me to start off Hogwarts!" Colin said happily. "With all the attacks, being petrified and all. I didn't even need to do exams in my first year!"
"Yes, but you spent most of the year petrified," Hermione said. "Doesn't that sort of ruin it for you? You missed almost a whole year of important education, I mean that's worse off than I was! And in your first year!"
"Yeah, but it's a cool story to tell: Colin Creevey, the little boy who got petrified at eleven and killed at seventeen!" Colin still looked happy after mentioning his death.
"Er, nice…" Ron bit down on his lip and turned to the screen.
{Harry zooms ahead, trying to grab the snitch.}
"What?! The bludger literally should of hit me by now!" Harry cried. "It should hit me… soon…"
{Draco follows, then hits Harry's side.}
"WHAT? I am not that violent," said Draco grumpily.
"Yeah, you're really not," said Harry, thinking of when Draco had stamped on his nose.
{They both go down under the wood, followed by the bludger}
"You guys went under the stands?" Hermione gasped.
"No!" Harry cried. "This is just adding random things!"
"As well as taking random things out," said Ron.
{Draco almost catches the snitch, then looks back at Harry.}
"So none of this happened, and why is this movie making my character so idiotically dim-witted as to look back when I was so close to catching the Golden Snitch?" Malfoy asked, annoyance in his tone.
"It seems what they do to a lot of us, Malfoy," said Ron sadly. "Get used to it."
Draco: You'll never catch me, Potter!
"Er, well I actually won the game by making you think I was attacking you," Harry smirked. "But sure, let's say I won't catch you."
Draco smirked.
{Harry zooms past Draco. Draco catches up and they are flying side-by-side. They come up above the wood and Colin is standing there then takes a photo.}
"Wow, Colin really is desperate for his pictures?" Ginny laughed, glancing over at Colin who just crossed his arms.
"That's actually a good idea, but no way I would have been able to get down there, plus, apparently they didn't go through all that wood stuff," Colin explained, and Ginny just rolled her eyes.
{The bludger comes zooming after them, and Colin ducks.}
"Good thing the actor ducked, or…" Ron shook his head darkly.
"Honestly Ron, how many times must I explain this to you?" Hermione said, annoyed. "The bludger wouldn't of actually hurt him!"
"But… it's a bludger!" Ron cried.
"A fake bludger!" Hermione cried.
"I… I still don't get it." Ron's puzzled face was enough to make Hermione laugh.
{The snitch, the two boys and the bludger go back under the wood.}
"And… we're back under the stands," said Harry.
"Gotta hope they don't collapse," Ginny said. "Otherwise you and Malfoy'd die along with the audience."
"Well, that'd suck," Harry replied.
{The bludger thumps against the sides and zigzags across in front of them before disappearing.}
"Wait… it's leaving you alone!" Hermione cried.
Harry looked at the screen in confusion. "I… I dunno why… it never left me alone."
"Besides, it should have hit your arm by now anyway… who knows what's going to happen," Ron shrugged.
{Soon it comes from the front back at them.}
"That's actually pretty smart of the bludger," Hermione observed.
"You do realise that didn't even happen, though?" asked Harry.
"Well, it's smart of the… fake bludger."
{They both manage to dodge it. Draco loses control of his broom and hits it on a bit of wood before going flying into the Quidditch pitch and rolling in a landing, before coming to a stop and looking nauseas.}
"Ha! Take that, Malfoy!" Ron cried, crossing his arms and smiling triumphantly. Harry opened his mouth to speak, but Ron put his hand out. "I know it didn't happen… it should of, though! It's gold!"
"Not as good as when I hit him," Hermione grinned.
"Nothing's ever as good as that," Ron smiled back.
"Oi Lovebirds!" Draco cried. "You do realise I'm right here?"
Ron and Hermione grinned.
{The crowd checks that he's OK before sitting back down again. Harry is back in the pitch, reaching out for the snitch before the bludger comes back and hits Harry's extended arm, which he clutches.}
"Did I just teleport back into the pitch?" Harry asked, bewildered. "And finally the bludger has hit me!"
"Didn't it hit you quite a while ago, like before Malfoy had swerved away?" Hermione asked.
"Yes!" Harry cried. "All that random stuff before, well I dunno what that was all about."
{With his good arm, he stretches it out before falling off his broom. Hagrid, Ron and Hermione all start moving.}
"Here we go, this actually happened, right?" Ron asked.
"Yes, this is literally the first part of the Quidditch match that actually happened," Harry confirmed.
"They really must add all that random stuff just for the sake of it, don't they?" Ron shook his head, annoyed.
Hermione: Let's go…
"Go?" Hermione repeated. "Go where?"
"We'll see I guess," said Ron.
{Harry opens his palm to reveal the snitch.}
"OK, but I look in a much better shape here, I mean, I was literally trying not to pass out, and I'm still confused why it's not raining," said Harry.
"Well, when you think about it, it must be so hard to film these Quidditch games," Hermione guessed.
"It's simple!" Ron cried. "You just get the brooms, the bludgers, he waffle and the snitch, then you play, and you film it!"
Hermione just facepalmed and rolled her eyes.
Lee: Harry Potter has caught the snitch! Gryffindor wins!
"Wow, who saw that coming? It's so unpredictable," Albus said in a bored tone.
"Unpredictable?" Harry said. "Can't you accept your dad is the best Quidditch player of all time?"
Ginny cleared her throat and nudged Harry. "Excuse me?"
"Why, what did you do?" Harry asked, grinning.
Ginny just rolled her eyes. "Idiot."
{Harry smiles as the bludger comes zooming down towards him.}
"Woah, what is happening…" Harry wondered. "I just passed out, I don't remember this…"
"The bludger'll never leave you alone, will it?" Wood observed.
"No," said Harry. "I feel like this movie is drawing it out a little, which doesn't really make sense because of time constraints and this would be hard to film."
"Maybe they thought this would be more entertaining?" Ron suggested.
{He rolls to the side to avoid it, only for it to come back down several times}
"Wow, ah, oh my god," Hermione stared at the screen in disbelief.
"That didn't happen," Harry told her. "And how I'm rolling on a broken arm, I dunno…"
{Hagrid, Ron and Hermione appear, and Hermione grabs out her wand.}
"We didn't come, no," Hagrid shook his head. "This is making stuff up!"
"And why is Hermione grabbing out her wand?" Ron asked. "Or, the girl pretending to be Hermione, whatever."
Hermione: Finite Incantatem!
"I'm doing spells now?" Hermione asked. "Why?"
"Finite incantatum, that's like, the counter-spell one, right?" Ron asked her.
"Yes."
{The bludger explodes.}
"So now Hermione' going round exploding bludgers?" Harry asked. "Well that makes total sense, seeing now the school will have to buy a new bludger."
"Oh, good on you Hermione," Ron said in a teasing voice.
"And it was George and I who had to wrestle the bludger into the box," Fred complained.
"We honestly get no credit for any jobs we do," George humphed.
{Ron, Hermione and Hagrid race over to Harry along with other students and teachers led by Lockhart.}
"Oh, here comes Fraudhart," Harry groaned. "He looks so dramatic, but of course I didn't see him coming because I'd passed out!"
"Well, I was very concerned about you of course, Harry," Lockhart said, flashing his too-white grin. "I didn't want your poor arm dying!"
"You just made it worse!" Madam Pomfrey exploded.
Harry: Thank you.
"You didn't thank us for getting rid of the bludger for you!" George grumbled.
"Suck it up, princess!" Harry teased.
"You suck it up!" Fred sniffed. "Oh George, we should be princesses!"
"Fairy Princesses!" George added.
All of a sudden, two twin fairy princess outfits appeared in front of them.
"Holy…" Fred's eyes lit up, and the twins rushed towards the dresses.
"This may take a while," Angelina buried her head in her arms with embarrassment.
"Let's just continue for now," Ginny snorted.
Hermione: Are you OK?
"What's with all this?" Harry asked. "Seriously, Lockhart should have come over by now, none of this even happened."
"So much for time constraints," mumbled Ginny.
Harry: No. I think my… I think my arm's broken.
"You think?" Harry asked. "Given the fact my arm was bending… where it shouldn't be bending…"
"It doesn't seem to be doing that here," said Ron. "That is a terrible actor!"
"He's not a terrible actor!" Hermione cried. "His arm isn't really broken!"
Lockhart: Not to worry, Harry. I'll fix that arm of yours straight away.
"Lockhart hadn't said anything to me when he first arrived in front of me," said Harry.
"You did a nasty job, Gilderoy," Madam Pomfrey said, annoyed.
"Look, I tried to fix his arm!" Lockhart said proudly.
"Well, you suck at fixing arms!" Madam Pomfrey spat. "Now don't talk to me!"
Harry: No... not you.
"That's what I said when he I first saw him, and I said oh no," said Harry.
Lockhart appeared to open his mouth before the bathroom door burst open and two twin fairy princesses with bright red hair came in.
"It is me, Princess Freddie!" Fred grinned.
"And Princess Georgie!" George beamed.
"Er, are you two just going to sit around in those dresses for the rest of the time?" Ginny asked.
"Er, no," said George. "It's quite uncomfortable."
"Yeah, this was a stupid idea," Fred humphed.
And with that, they were back into the bathroom.
Lockhart: Oh, he doesn't know what he's saying. Now, this won't hurt a bit.
"He actually said then that he was about to fix my arm," Harry said. "Which I did not want him to do, Madam Pomfrey."
"We'll see about that, hey?" Madam Pomfrey was still annoyed.
{He pulls Harry's sleeve up. He pulls out his wand.}
"What about me protesting? What about Colin taking photos!" Harry cried.
"Hem hem," Ginny said, turning to Colin. "Due to child safety measures that are at Hogwarts, you were breaking the law by taking photos of Harry that he didn't want taken."
"Well… well, it's not like as soon as social media was invented I put the photos all over there," Colin said. "No, I definitely didn't do that…"
"COLIN!" Harry yelled. "But… but I thought your camera died when you were petrified?"
"It's called an SD card," Colin said. "I always take it out of my camera unless I'm going to take a photo, just in case."
"Wait… but… weren't you… trying to take a photo of the basilisk?" Harry asked.
"How do you know all this, Mr Potter?" McGonagall asked.
Harry ignored her as Colin started to answer.
"Nope! I was just holding my camera up in fear," he smiled.
"So, why did you put the photos up for the world to see?" Harry asked angrily.
"Proof of magic!" Colin said happily.
Harry facepalmed. "Oh, Colin…"
Lockhart: Brakium Amendo!
"Well it was actually a silent spell," Lockhart grinned. "I am so awfully talented that I do silent spells!"
"You're not talented at all," said Hermione.
"You're just a plain old fraud," Ron finished.
{He lifts up Harry's arm which is now like jelly. Students are disgusted.}
"Ewwwww…" Madam Pomfrey bleached along with many other people. "You just… let him?"
"No!" Harry cried. "I didn't I said I should go to the hospital wing, Wood agreed with me!"
"That is true, Madam," said Wood. "And then I was telling Harry what an excellent catch he'd done, before Lockhart said to stand back."
"Then I said no before he just… did the rubber arm spell thing," Harry finished. "And I'd closed my eyes when he was doing it."
Lockhart: Ah. Yes. Well, that can sometimes happen. But, ah, the point is, you can no longer feel any pain.
"First sentence, spot on, second, made up," Lockhart fired at the screen.
"My arm like that is literally so disgusting…" Harry said.
"At least it's good now," Lockhart smiled. "I really am a hero!"
"No, Madam Pomfrey told me how to grow them back, and I wouldn't of had to deal with skele-gro if it wasn't for you," Harry snapped.
Lockhart: And very clearly the bones are not broken.
"Clearly," Madam Pomfrey said angrily.
"And I said the point is that they weren't broken," Lockhart corrected, flashing a smile at Madam Pomfrey, who just made an annoyed noise and turned away from him.
Hagrid: Broken? There's no bones left!
"I didn't say that," said Hagrid. "But it's very indeedly true…"
{Lockhart bends Harry's arm back, but then it goes flying back to a normal position.}
"Eugh," Hermione looked queasy.
"That is literally the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," said Ron.
"The most disgusting?" Harry repeated.
"Oh… well, maybe not the most disgusting," Ron decided.
Lockhart: Much more flexible, though…
"I didn't say that, I told him to go to the hospital wing, and for Mr Weasley and Miss Granger to escort him there," said Lockhart.
"So is that your style in life?" Madam Pomfrey snapped. "Make someone's easy job harder then leave them to fix up your mistake?"
"Pretty much," Lockhart said, flashing his awful white smile.
{In the Hospital Wing. Draco is moaning.}
"What am I doing there?" Draco asked. "I'm not that big of a whiner!"
"Maybe because this made you fall of your broom," Pansy guessed, smiling at him which earned her a slap from Astoria.
Madam Pomfrey: Mr Malfoy, you can go now!
"Added line," said Hermione.
"I can't believe you were still standing up for Lockhart then," Ron muttered, disgusted.
"He was my celebrity crush, OK! I was thirteen years old, and it's not your place to judge," she said.
"Wait, so is Harry Ginny's celebrity crush which actually worked out for her?" Ron snorted.
Harry and Ginny exchanged looks.
Madam Pomfrey: He should have been brought straight to me!
"I said you, I was talking to Harry, not his friends, they were just there because they were there," said Madam Pomfrey.
"We were there to help Harry, like I helped get his useless arm," Ron looked angrily at Lockhart, "into the pyjama sleeve."
"And I… I was just there to be a good friend," Hermione said.
Madam Pomfrey: I can mend bones in a heartbeat — but growing them back —
"I said in a second," Madam Pomfrey corrected.
"What's longer?" asked Ron. "A heartbeat, or a second?"
"Oh, well I guess it depends on the heart rate," said Madam Pomfrey. "The average would be about seventy-five beats per minute?"
"So that means, the movie makes the spell of mending bones faster than you'd made it out to be in real life!" Ron said.
"Oh, well I don't know…" Madam Pomfrey said.
Hermione: You will be able to, won't you?
"Er, that's what I asked," said Harry.
"Hermione says all," said Hermione, grinning towards Ron, who rolled his eyes.
Madam Pomfrey: I'll be able to, certainly, but it will be painful. You're in for a rough night, Potter.
"I said that he'd have to stay the night," corrected Madam Pomfrey. "Instead of the second sentence that woman there said. Except I'd said he was in for a rough night after he'd changed into his pyjamas."
"And we'd talked a bit, which I guess will be skipped, too," Ron sighed.
Madam Pomfrey: Regrowing bones is nasty business.
"Yeah, the conversation about how you were saying I shouldn't be standing up for Lockhart," said Hermione.
"This doesn't even seem to be mentioning about your crush on Lockhart," said Harry.
{Harry takes the cup of skele-gro and spits it out.}
"Did you spit it out behind my back?" Madam Pomfrey asked.
"No, I spluttered a bit but didn't spit it out," said Harry.
Madam Pomfrey: Well, what did you expect — pumpkin juice?
"Yet another made up line," Madam Pomfrey sighed.
"Pumpkin juice?" Dudley repeated. "But… does pumpkin even have juice?"
"Yes," said Harry.
"But… I've never even felt juice come out of pumpkin," said Dudley.
"Well, it has juice. Now let's watch this movie."
{At night, in the hospital wing, Harry is woken up.}
"Yeah, I was woken up, but what about the Quidditch team coming over with all the food for a feast?" Harry asked.
"Maybe it's better this way," said George sadly. Harry hadn't even realised the twins were back in their seats.
"We won't have to deal with the pain of knowing we never got that feast," Fred added, shedding a tear.
Voice: Kill… kill… {Harry sits up}
"I heard the voice?" Harry asked. "Well I don't remember that."
"You can stop calling it the voice, you know," said Ginny. "It was called the basilisk."
Voice: Time… to… kill… {He puts his glasses on and hears weird noises before seeing Dobby.}
"I did see Dobby, but no voice was heard on that night," said Harry dramatically.
"Ah, Harry, I could have helped you deal with hearing a voice then," Lockhart said sympathetically. "I hear voices too, and if you'd only called on me…"
"Didn't I just say that I didn't hear the voice that night?" Harry asked.
"Oh. Well, why didn't you tell me about it the other times?" Lockhart asked.
"I said I heard a voice in the detention, and you just denied it," Harry snapped. "Now, do me a favour and shut up, would you?"
Dobby: Hello!
"Harry Potter actually spoke before Dobby did," said Dobby. "He told Dobby to get off."
"And then I realised it was you," said Harry. "And… you look so cheerful here. You were actually crying."
"D-Dobby was sad — Dobby just wanted Harry Potter to be safe!" Dobby said sadly.
"Well, I am safe now," said Harry. "There was nothing you needed to worry about."
Harry: Dobby?
"Basically made up, I guess," said Harry.
Dobby: Harry Potter should have listened to Dobby.
"That is not what Dobby said!" Dobby cried. "Dobby said that Harry Potter came to school, and that Dobby had warned him and asked why Harry Potter had to heed Dobby!"
"Seriously Dobby, I'm completely fine and safe," said Harry.
Dobby: Harry Potter should have gone back home when he missed the train.
"See Hermione, we didn't deserve to be punished! It wasn't our fault, it was Dobby's!" Ron cried.
"You were still the ones stupid enough to steal a car and fly it to Hogwarts instead of sending Hedwig with a letter!" Hermione snapped.
Harry: It was you? You stopped the barrier from letting Ron and me through!
"That was basically correct except I said us instead of Ron and me," said Harry.
"Dobby, you literally just gave yourself away," said Lily.
Dobby: Indeed yes, sir.
"He's so guilty he doesn't even deny it," laughed James.
Harry: You nearly got Ron and me expelled!
"That's pretty mean of you, Dobby," said Albus.
"Being expelled is a really big deal, maybe you shouldn't have done that, Dobby," Hermione said. "But your intentions were good, so you can be forgiven."
"Oh yeah, I forgot that being expelled is worse than dying," Ron laughed. Hermione just rolled her eyes.
"I said that later, though," said Harry. "After Dobby explained how he'd done it and said he'd had to iron his hands."
Dobby: At least you would be away from here. Harry Potter must go home! Dobby thought his Bludger would be enough to make Harry Potter see that —
"It was Dobby!" James jr, Albus, Rose, Lily jr and Hugo cried in unison.
"And Dobby didn't say about the bludger until after I said I might strangle him and he said he was used to death threats, and then I asked him about the pillowcase, and then he said about his bludger," said Harry.
Harry: Your Bludger? You made that Bludger chase after me?
"Harry Potter said bludger to try and kill him… but Harry Potter must understand, Dobby would never kill anyone, especially not Harry Potter!" Dobby cried.
"You wouldn't kill Bellatrix Lestrange?" Hermione asked, eyeing Bellatrix who was sitting next to Voldemort in the back row.
"Well… no," said Dobby. "But Dobby likes this movie. Let's watch."
Dobby: Dobby feels most aggrieved, sir. Dobby had to iron his hands...
"He said about ironing his hands after he told me about sealing the gateway," said Harry. "I was beginning to think they wouldn't have that at all."
{Dobby shows his bandaged hands}
"Dobby! You shouldn't of done that!" Hermione said.
"Dobby had to…" Dobby cried. "Dobby was bad and had to punish himself!"
"You weren't bad, you were trying to save my friend, Dobby, you shouldn't have—"
"Alright, Hermione," said Ron. "We get it. Don't start talking about spew again."
"I wasn't going to talk about S.P.E.W.!" Hermione snapped. "I was just making sure Dobby's okay."
Harry: You'd better clear off before my bones come back, Dobby, or I might strangle you!
"That was said earlier to," said Harry. "Before the talk about the bludger."
"Did you seriously give a death threat to my old good-for-nothing House Elf?" Draco snorted.
"He's not good for nothing, he saved my life several times," said Harry. "And only because he literally almost got Ron and me expelled!"
{Dobby screams and jumps off the bed.}
"Why is Dobby screaming? He's used to death threats!" Dobby said calmly.
"Those good-for-nothing Malfoys giving you death threats?" Hermione asked. "It's OK Dobby, there's heaps of support here a S—"
"WE GET IT!" Ron cried. "We get it, OK?"
"You dare use my own words against me, Mudblood?" Draco snarled.
"Her name is Hermione," Ron snapped. "And you can shut up, good-for-nothing Malfoy."
Dobby: Dobby is used to death threats, sir. Dobby gets them five times a day at home.
"Then why is Fake Dobby screaming and stepping away from Fake Harry Potter?" Dobby asked.
"Because apparently that's more dramatic, maybe? As if our life wasn't dramatic enough," Harry laughed.
Harry: I don't suppose you could tell me why you're trying to kill me?
"Dobby had said about how he just wanted Harry Potter injured enough to be sent home," said Dobby.
"And I asked Dobby why he wanted be to go home in pieces," Harry added.
{Harry follows Dobby as he steps back away from Harry}
"Oh, poor Dobby has a bad past, he keeps backing away from Harry, look," said Hermione sadly.
"He didn't actually do that," said Harry. "He just kept trying to tell me I should go home."
Dobby: Not kill you, sir, never kill you!
"That's what Dobby said after Harry Potter had said about the bludger killing him!" Dobby said.
Dobby: Dobby remembers how it was before Harry Potter triumphed over He Who Must Not Be Named. We house elves were treated like vermin, sir. Of course, Dobby is still treated like vermin...
"I'd give that… a three? Or a two, even out of ten," said Harry. "A lot of words and sentences were wrong and it was actually a lot longer than that. And I guess we aren't going to talk about why Dobby wears that pillowcase."
"Dobby felt absolutely wonderful when he got that sock!" Dobby cried, smiling.
{Dobby starts crying and blows his nose on the pillowcase he is wearing.}
Harry: Why do you wear that thing, Dobby?
"Oh, wow!" Harry cried. "We actually are going to have the explanation of why Dobby wears a pillowcase."
"The pillowcase must have been so uncomfortable, poor Dobby…" said Hermione.
"Yeah, we know, but this was quite a while ago, so it doesn't matter now," Ron replied.
Dobby: This, sir? 'Tis a mark of the house elf's enslavement. Dobby can only be freed if his master presents him with clothes.
"Wow," said Harry flatly. "It had half of what he said. Not impressed."
"You're not impressed by anything in this movie," said Ginny, rolling her eyes.
"Yeah, well they're literally getting my life and twisting up the truth!" Harry responded. "They shouldn't do that."
{Footsteps are heard. Dobby jumps back on the bed.}
"I do not remember hearing any footsteps," said Harry.
"Harry Potter shone like a beacon for us House Elves," said Dobby, smiling.
Dobby: Listen! Listen! Terrible things are about to happen at Hogwarts! Harry Potter must not stay here now that history is to repeat itself!
"That's what Dobby said in the same monologue as he was saying before, they just skipped a whole heap of stuff and had a pause," said Harry.
"Except even that bit before is a bit wrong," said Dobby. "Dobby said the terrible things may already be happening, and that the chamber of secrets had been opened once more."
"The whole chamber of secrets thing is pretty creepy," said Hugo.
Harry: Repeat itself? You mean, this has happened before?
"I said the same gist of that earlier," said Harry. "After Dobby bashed my glass against his head…"
{Dobby gasps.}
Dobby: I shouldn't of said that!
Rose gasped. "That's like what Hagrid kept saying in the movie we watched before!"
"These people keep telling Harry things so he all of a sudden knows everything he shouldn't know," Ginny grinned.
"Dobby didn't say that, though," Dobby sighed.
{He grabs the skele-gro bottle and hits his head with it.}
"Dobby, you hit yourself with the glass I'd drank out of, didn't you?" Harry asked.
"Yes, Dobby didn't hit himself with the bottle…" said Dobby sadly.
Dobby: Ah! Bad Dobby! Ah!
"He said bad Dobby, very bad Dobby," Harry corrected.
"Dobby's not bad!" Hermione cried.
Harry: Dobby! Dobby, stop it! Stop it!
"I don't think I said that," said Harry. "I asked him more about the Chamber of Secrets and grabbed his wrist before he could hit himself again."
{Harry snatches the bottle off Dobby then grabs his pillowcase.}
"Harry Potter grabbed Dobby's wrist, not his pillowcase…" Dobby said.
"Yeah, so you wouldn't keep hitting yourself with the glass!" Harry cried.
Harry: Tell me, Dobby. When did this happen before? Who's doing it now?
"That is not what Harry Potter said," Dobby said sadly.
"It's basically a summary of the many different questions I asked Dobby as he constantly said he couldn't say," said Harry.
"So, Dobby could warn you something was happening but he couldn't tell you who was doing it? Wow, just wow." Ron rolled his eyes at this.
Dobby: Dobby cannot say, sir. Dobby only wants Harry Potter to be safe.
Harry: No, Dobby! Tell me, who is it?
"Wow, a very very abridged version of our conversation, should it be continuing, or what?" Harry wondered.
"It would be hard to tell, Harry Potter," said Dobby.
{Dobby clicks then disappears. Harry sees shadows and quickly lies down. Some teachers enter.}
"Well, that wasn't right," said Harry. "But now the teachers come in and it's confirm the chamber of secrets is open time!"
"That will be wrong, I bet you," Ginny laughed.
Madam Pomfrey: Put him here. What happened?
"We came in together, Albus and had already put Mr Creevey down before I went to get Madam Pomfrey," said McGonagall.
"Ha! What'd I tell you!" Ginny laughed.
Dumbledore: There's been another attack.
"And I also said Minerva had found him on the stairs," said Dumbledore.
McGonagall: I think he's been petrified, Madam Pomfrey.
"I said about the grapes around him, and how he'd probably been coming up to see Mr Potter," said McGonagall.
"And it was me who asked if he'd been petrified, before you confirmed it, Minerva," said Madam Pomfrey.
McGonagall: Perhaps he managed to take a picture of his attacker...
"Nope!" Colin smiled. "I didn't have an SD card in the camera at the time!"
"And I said you don't think, not perhaps," corrected McGonagall.
{They take the camera to reveal Colin Creevey with his eyes tightly shut.}
"Why are his eyes like that?" Harry asked. "They were wide open!"
"You watched us?" Dumbledore asked. "You heard the entire conversation?"
"Er, yeah, sorry sir…" said Harry guiltily.
{Dumbledore opens the camera and smoke comes up from it.}
"My poor camera!" Colin moaned sadly. "I had to buy a new one, cost me a fortune! All because of the stupid snake thing!"
"What is the point of getting a proper camera when you have a camera on your phone?" Dudley grumbled.
"You can't take photos on your phone," Colin laughed.
McGonagall: What does this mean, Albus?
"That skipped Madam Pomfrey saying good gracious and that it had all melted," said Harry.
"What does it mean?" asked Rose.
"You'll see," said Dumbledore.
Dumbledore: It means that our students are in great danger.
"Wow, very specific," said Albus, rolling his eyes. "But aren't they always in great danger?"
"Yeah, it's Hogwarts," said Harry. "But… Dumbledore didn't say that, he just went on saying the chamber of secrets had been opened…"
McGonagall: What should I tell the staff, Albus?
"Another made up line," said McGonagall. "I was asking who could have opened the chamber of secrets."
"Before I said the question is not who, but how," Dumbledore finished.
Dumbledore: The truth. Tell them Hogwarts is now no longer safe. It is how we feared, Minerva. The chamber of secrets has indeed been opened again.
"The first bit of that was made up," said Harry. "And Dumbledore is finally saying that the chamber of secrets has been opened!"
"And even the line is wrong," said McGonagall, rolling her eyes. "Albus said the chamber was indeed opened again."
"That music is so dramatic," Ginny laughed.
Unfortunately the school holidays have ended, so I'll have less time to write, so updates won't be as frequent as they used to be, sorry about that. But be back in the next chapter, "The Duelling Club"