I woke with swollen eyes and a sore throat just after dawn. My body was aching from the sheer amount of tossing and turning and flailing about. When I managed to drag myself into the bathroom, I flipped the light on and blinded myself for several minutes. The girl staring back at me was a stranger. Red nose. Raw, puffy eyes. Splotchy cheeks glistening with tears. Lips thin and drawn. I slapped my hand over the switch and was plunged back into darkness. I showered and dressed in a daze before grabbing my keys and driving to school. I sat in all of my usual seats during class time, but none of my friends bothered to speak to me. I was glad for it.

I kept my eyes on the teachers or my textbooks all day long. At lunch, I escaped to the bathrooms and stayed in a stall for half an hour. In gym, I told the coach I was feeling sick and after glancing at me for a moment, I was excused. I sat on the bench, staring blankly at my shoes for the hour as the sound of sneakers on polished floorboards echoed in my ears. When the final bell rang, I picked up my backpack and trudged through the rain to my truck.

I was soaking wet by the time I climbed into the cab, but I didn't care. With shaking hands and trembling shoulders, I turned on the heater and stared at the foggy windshield. I didn't back out of my parking spot even as I listened to the sounds of laughter and tires on pavement. I waited until the windshield began to thaw out and the world beyond became clearer. Just to the right, only two spaces away, sat a silver Volvo. Most of the vehicles were tearing out of the parking lot. I waited until only ours remained. Edward leaned against his car, looking at a small novel in his hands, but twice he glanced at me. Swallowing heavily, I leaned across the seats and slung the passenger door open. My heart hammered as I waited.

Edward closed the novel gently, stuffing it into the pocket of his coat. He walked my way with a confident gait before smoothly sliding into the cab. With gentle hands, he closed the door. His scent, sweet and sharp, assaulted my senses the moment we were enclosed together. I wondered if that potent mixture of dread and desire whirled inside of him when he smelt me as it did when I smelt him.

I cleared my throat and croaked, "It was all because I cut my finger."

There was a beat of silence before I clarified, "During my birthday."

"Yes and no." He whispered with golden eyes roaming over my face. I stared straight ahead, looking at the forest just beyond the edge of the parking lot. I blinked and muttered, "Explain."

"You have always been in danger from myself and my family." Edward quietly said, "I have told you so from the beginning. Jasper's attack was to be expected, but somehow, I still found myself surprised when it occurred. Stupid of me, in all honesty. We are predators and you are prey, as nature dictates, but I now know you and I are far beyond the demands of nature. It took living without you to discover so."

My chin trembled as hard as my shoulders. I pressed my lips together and blinked rapidly until the tears were gone. I croaked, "You're here to kill Victoria."

"I am." Edward agreed softly, "And yet I would have come regardless."

"Excuse me?" I squeaked. My cheeks blushing from the tone of my voice. I still didn't look at him, but glared into the thick foliage ahead.

"Every moment away from you was a year. I couldn't think, function, without you. It became so bad that I removed myself from my family to spare them pain. I would remind myself, continuously and endlessly, that you were better off without my interference in your life. At times, I believe I nearly convinced myself. Other times, I would catch myself running as if I would go to you despite the fact I was on a different continent. I was going mad, Bella. It was insanity each day that I replayed every word you have ever spoken. It was insanity as I wondered what you were doing and if you were happy. I had convinced myself I had only to see you with my eyes, to see you happy and healthy, and then I would be able to move on. I had a flight booked to Washington already when Alice called to inform me of Victoria."

My chin dropped to my chest as I squeezed my eyes shut. My breath wheezed out of me. Edward whispered, "I was anxious when I arrived to find you in the company of werewolves. I have seen the damage they can do and it rivals that of a vampire. Please, don't misunderstand me. I was, and still am, grateful to the shapeshifters for protecting you from Victoria."

Edward sighed so softly and said, "Nonetheless, I confess that I hadn't expected to find you in the arms of a werewolf and a newly transformed one at that. Mike Newton was my preferred choice of torture during those dark months. Tyler Crowley, even. Not Jacob Black. He wasn't remotely on my mind. That shows how wrong a man can be, I suppose."

There was a slight pause and then he said, "I saw how my leaving affected you, Bella. I have seen it in his mind, although he does his best to block me from hearing his thoughts. I have seen the way you shy away from conversation of me and how my presence has affected your relationship with him. That is how I know there is a fighting chance, slim though it might be."

I shook my head and muttered, "Don't assume."

"I apologize." He murmured, "I meant only to say that I am relieved you care for me even after what I have done."

"Of course." I croaked, "I care for you. That doesn't change."

"Only your love." Edward murmured, "Only that has changed."

"I love him." My voice shook and my eyes fell closed. There was another nearly inaudible sigh before Edward whispered, "I'm too late. I've hurt you too much."

A whimper left my throat. He murmured, "My own folly. I have none to blame but myself. I'll deal with Victoria. You will be safe. Of this, I promise you."

He opened the truck door and icy wind billowed into the cab. I was shivering as my eyes flew open. Bubbles erupted inside of my stomach, causing painful cramps. Cold sweat broke out across my palms and slid down my spine. Still, I trembled and breathed unevenly. I swiped at the tears and frantically cried, "Wait!"

Edward stilled his movements until he was nearly unnatural. Golden eyes, darkened now to a deep amber, intensely stared at my face. He took in the red nose and red-rimmed eyes. I choked, "I love you, too."

A ghost of a smile flickered across Edward's lips. His pale eyelids fluttered shut before he gave me an amber gaze once more. He leaned into the cab, twisting his lithe torso, and stretching out a pale hand. Artistic fingers danced as they wiped hot tears away from my skin. For an extended moment, one that seemed as if it could go on for infinity, Edward searched my face. His fingertips sent jolts of lightening through me. My pulse thumped rapidly in the hollow of my throat. No matter how many attempts, I found that I couldn't swallow. Edward murmured, "I will earn your forgiveness, my love. Whatever you need from me is yours."

He caressed my jawline, face drawing closer as he brushed fingertips across my forehead. Golden eyes focused pointedly on a thin, white scar. One that was fairly new. One that came from my clumsy feet and a fast paced bike. Edward slowly, inch by terrifying inch, brought his lips to that scar. His cool lips were like being doused in icy water. I gasped involuntarily. My eyes were wide as Edward pulled back.

He said, "You have only to speak, to ask, and I'll provide. Don't cry, Isabella. Not for me. You're too precious to suffer on my account."

"I-I can't…" My voice trailed off and broke in odd places. "I don't know if I can…be…or do…I mean. Oh, Edward."

"Shhh," He crooned, "There is no explanations needed, no excuse for feelings on your part. You have done nothing wrong, Bella. Nothing at all. I am the fool."

Edward was holding my jaw in his cold, smooth palm now. His eyes were swirling golden and pure. His sweet breath was gushing across my face and leaving me weaker than ever. I swallowed heavily as my heart soared so high that it stuck in my throat. It took several tries before I choked out, "I love him. I love Jacob. I-I…He and I…We are…"

My eyes shut and I sobbed, "This isn't happening."

"It is happening." Edward corrected gently, "Although, you owe me nothing. I ask for nothing more than truth, which you have given me."

"What? What have I given you?" I sobbed. My eyes stayed tightly closed with my head pushed deeply into the leather seats.

He quietly replied, "Every look. Every beat of your heart. Speaking to me despite your pain. Actions say far more than words are capable of."

There was a pause.

"I have a headache." I croaked while looking up with swollen eyes. He leaned down with a sad, twisted smile. He whispered thoughtfully, "I am selfish, Isabella, so horridly selfish."

And then he pressed wintery lips to mine. It was just a moment, just a swift moment gone within less than a blink of the eye, but it was filled with impact. Cold and smooth and flawless and sweet. I gasped again. My heart was stuck in my throat. My head pushed back and smacked the seat rather heavily. Edward pulled back to take in my expression. He murmured, "Never again will I willingly leave you. I will stay at your side until you send me away, Bella."

He slid out of the cab before slowly and gently shutting the truck door. I watched, lips numb and eyes burning, as Edward gracefully loped across the parking lot. He was inside of his sleek car within the blink of an eye. I was too tired to be embarrassed about Alice being in the passenger seat. She was perfectly patient as she witnessed my crying fest. Another moment passed before I found my fumbling fingers working the keys into the ignition. It took two tries for me to start the truck and a long moment of uneven breathing before I managed to properly back out of my parking spot.

I drove home very slowly. The drizzle, which steadily built in speed and ferocity, made driving all the more difficult. I sat in the cab, engine roaring, as the rain carried on. The sky was dark gray, but I absentmindedly watched it go black. Eventually, I turned the engine off and felt the unforgiving cold creep in. It settled within my bones far faster than should be normal. When I heard a droning howl, somehow sharp even through the roar of the wind and rain, I was startled from my trance. I opened the truck door and immediately was drenched in rain. Fighting to keep the hefty door open, I stumbled from the truck. I skidded across the icy sidewalk. The porch steps nearly did me in, but I finally managed to make it inside.

I didn't bother turning on lights, but rather stayed in the blackness. I was shivering as I dropped my backpack to the floor in the living room. I kicked off my boots and trudged up the stairs while wringing out my wet hair. My clothes were plastered to my skin. My jacket was too heavy, so I slipped it off and dropped it on the floor in the hallway. My soggy socks followed. My teeth clattered and my chin trembled. I pulled off my sweater with extreme difficulty before it was dropped to the floor with a loud splat. Quite a pile was growing as I unbuttoned my jeans and began to shimmy the fabric down my hips. I kicked and stumbled about until my legs were free. Breathing heavily, I leaned against the wall and bowed forward with my hands pressed to my bare knees.

Tears still flowed, unchecked and hot, down my frozen cheeks. My fingers were so cold they looked discolored, so I rubbed them together quickly. As I wiped at my eyes, I saw the dark form standing in my bedroom doorway. My heart dropped from my tightened throat to the bottom of my stomach. The usual fleeting impressions were all present: so very tall and broad, russet skin and dark hair, and power. Thick and unapologetic power. It was the twisting of his handsome features that made my heart feel as if it would burst and die a very painful death.

Jacob snapped, "So, all is forgiven, yeah? A few poetic words and you're willing to overlook everything that leech has done?"

I shook my head with my mouth open. No words came. His eyes were black and disturbed like flames licking at skin, which only served to remind me how much I yearned for melting mocha instead. Full lips, made for deep laughs and goofy grins, were withered. A bottomless, sinister snarl was building within his chest and echoing like the thudding of a war-drum. He demanded, "Have you ever had sex with him?"

The words hit me like a stone. I closed my eyes, unable to stand the sight of such fury and jealousy contorting Jacob's loving features.

"What? Vamp got your tongue? You were chatty as hell with Cullen from what I hear. All snuggled up in your truck. Am I not even worth your notice now that Prince Charming is back?"

"Stop it." I breathed, "Jacob. Please. You're being crude because you're hurting. I get it. Just…Please, don't do this."

"Please?" He snarled, stepping forward until he was looming over me. I didn't back up, only stuck my chin out and met his eyes. My vision was blurry, but I knew not giving him my eyes was an insult too profound to comprehend. "Please? What are you begging for, Bella? What in the hell could you possibly need to beg me for?"

Jacob's words grew deeper and hoarser. "Haven't I given you enough?"

"Everything." I breathed, awestruck and horrified.

"Everything?" He echoed tightly, "Really? I find that hard to believe. A man like me can't give you everything, can't give you what he can. No money. No big-league education. No fancy cars or houses or jewelry or trips around the world."

The smirk left his face and he was oddly blank when he choked, "No immortality. No golden eyes and pale skin. No eternal fucking beauty."

"None of that matters to me." I whispered roughly, "You know that."

Jacob hesitated for a moment before barking, "Do I? Do I, Bella? What else could you want from me? Heart, brain, body, my goddamn soul? I've given it all to you already, but that isn't enough for you, is it, Isabella?"

He smirked suddenly and I was reminded starkly of Jekyll and Hyde. My eyes stayed on his even though it hurt like a punch to the nose. He cackled and it was hollow to my ears. Jacob mocked, "Isabella. That's what he likes to call you the most. All soft and sing-song. My precious Isabella. Seems you don't mind him saying your given name, but you always prefer what Cullen prefers, don't you, Bella?"

My knees shook as I tried to step forward. I stumbled and Jacob reacted instinctively, catching me at the elbow with one large palm. He released me just as quickly as he grabbed me, but I was desperate. My cold, wet fingers wrapped around his wrist as he pulled away. I barreled into his thick chest. My face was pressed against his hot skin as I sobbed and clung to him like a slithering eel. For the first time, Jacob didn't return my embrace. Thick arms didn't wrap around my waist. A warm nose didn't playfully nuzzle my neck. A chin didn't rub against my hair while full lips pressed kisses to the crown of my head.

"I didn't lie to him or you. I love him and I can't be sorry for that, Jacob. None of that takes away from what I feel for you. I love you, Jake, so much that it scares me."

Jacob made a noise, but I couldn't be sure what it meant. I felt his muscles tensing. I urgently continued in a garbled voice. "I want you. It took so long for me to admit that to myself, but it's true. I wouldn't change what I feel for you. Nobody has ever understood me as well as you do. I've never fit with someone like I fit with you. Believe me, please."

His body went terribly still beneath me. Just the slightest raising of his chest and thundering of his heart let me know that Jacob was alive and listening. I begged, "Jacob, believe me. Believe me."

"Say that I do," He roughly replied, "What does it matter?"

I wobbled, tipping backward too far as I tried to look up at him. Jacob's palms caught me by the hips. His fingers dug in a bit too hard, but his fierce expression held my attention too thoroughly for me to notice. Black eyes and dark eyebrows scrunched together tightly. His lips were pressed into a thin line.

"Well?" Jacob snapped impatiently, "What do your feelings for me actually change? You're still pining after Cullen. You're afraid I will imprint and leave you, so you're leaving me instead. You're going right back to him, aren't you?"

"N-No." I stuttered, sniffling wetly. "H-He lied. He s-says he left to protect me. I realized that after a while, but he still lied. You...don't lie to me."

"Great." Jacob muttered, "That clears it all up for me."

Jacob let me go so abruptly that I stumbled. With a hot sigh, he caught my elbow and demanded, "Stay on your feet."

"Stop it!" I shrieked suddenly. My arms waved out in a violent gesture. My voice broke as I shouted, "He left me! He lied and he left me and even knowing Edward meant well doesn't change those facts. I loved him then and I love him now and nothing will ever change that, either."

I abruptly inhaled, trying to catch my breath as my nose and eyes ran with tears and snot. I wiped fitfully at my face while Jacob scoffed loudly. "Go tell him. I don't need to hear your love-sick declarations. Go have your dreamy makeup scene and leave me out of it. This is all a bunch of bullshit."

I stepped forward just as he swung away from me as if to head for the stairs. Blindly, I stood on the tips of my toes and shoved at his broad shoulders until he turned back around. My palms stung as they met his bare skin. I started raining hits with my closed fist as I yelled, "You egotistical, big-headed jerk! Don't you dare walk away from me!"

With each hit I spoke between gritted teeth. "I'm. In. Love. With. You. Damnit. Jake. Why. Are. You. So. Stubborn. And. Jealous. I've. Never. Even. Had. Sex. Before. Stupid. Arrogant. Jerk."

One big hand caught both of my wrists. I struggled, tears streaming as I cried. I glared with swollen eyes and blurry vision. "I love you, Jacob." I croaked, "I love you so much and if you say you won't leave me, I believe you. Don't you understand?"

"No. I'm too afraid to hope." He said simply as he gently tugged on my wrists. Bending down, Jacob loomed over me and met my stare. He gruffly said, "I need you to be crystal clear."

"I can't walk away from you." I whispered brokenly.

He murmured, "Do you want me, Bella? Are you mine? Only mine?"

"Yes." I answered wobbly, "Yes."

"Say it." Jacob demanded huskily. "Tell me."

"I want you." I whispered, "I'm yours."

Jacob's eyes closed as a harsh smile touched his lips. He squeezed my wrists once before letting them go and wrapping me in the safe, soft cocoon of his arms. And he was everywhere. Nose in my hair and chin scraping along the top of my head. Lips on my temples. Arms wrapped around my waist and hands kneading at my lower back. His fingertips played with the hem of my undershirt. Jacob murmured, "You're freezing. Let's get you out of these damp clothes."

For a moment, I thought he would strip me. Instead, Jacob bent low at the knees and smoothly scooped me into his arms. Carrying me into my bedroom, he kicked the door shut and slowly set me on my feet. The darkness only let me see flashes of his features from the cracking lightening, but just a glimpse showed me the somberness of his expression. It was an improvement from his fury. Jacob swallowed loudly and said, "I'll go downstairs and make you a cup of hot cider. Put on pajamas and get under the blankets to warm up, Bells. Are you hungry?"

I felt numb and confused. I mumbled, "Cider. Just cider…and you."

A soft smile pulled at the corners of his mouth. Jacob whispered, "I'll be right back."