Of course, it was game night. Emily felt slightly annoyed as she got settled in the dugout, watching. Then she realized that neither Beth or Gil were there.

"You gotta forfeit," the other team leader was saying to Luke. "Not enough players."

"Aw, come on," Goose complained. "We can go one man short."

"Rules are rules," the other guy shrugged.

Emily thought they'd be going home until she saw Luke look over at her. She was instantly on alert.

"No," she shook her head as he gestured at her to the other guy and then headed her way.

"Hey," he said when he got in front of her.

"No," she said firmly.

"You've practised enough. I think you got this," Luke insisted.

"I suck, and you know it."

"Just one game. Just stand there and let the others do their thing and catch if you have to. We need to play or else we just wasted the last few weeks."

Emily bit her lip, looking at everyone, who were all looking at her. She felt a lot of pressure. She looked back at Luke.

"I can't..." she started. He sat down beside her and rested his leg next to hers, his hand on her knee reassuringly.

"You can," he said strongly.

"I don't feel up to being a laughingstock," she told him.

"I'll punch anyone who laughs at you," he promised seriously.

"We playing or not?" the guy called, and, without looking, Luke held up his index finger to gesture "one more minute."

"I'll make it up to you," he said to her, squeezing her knee gently.

"Okay, but one person mocks me, and I'm out," she warned.

"Fair enough."

He pulled out his extra t-shirt from his bag and handed it to her. She pulled it on over her tank top and followed him to the field. She was absolutely terrified.

...

It was going well until they wanted her to go up to bat. She positioned herself the best she could from what she remembered Luke showing her, but she felt like she was going to throw up. This was not her thing. She didn't like all the attention focused on her.

The first ball whizzed past the end of her nose, and she managed to hold back her shriek.

"Strike one!"

Emily felt bad. She knew they were counting on her, but she had told Luke she was no good at this. He knew.

She swung at the second ball and missed, earning a cheery, "Strike two!" behind her.

"Hey," Luke called from third base, getting her attention for a second. "Just relax."

Of course he could tell she was tenser than a guitar string. She tried to relax, but it didn't seem like it was working. If Roger was there, he'd smack her and tell her to smarten up. He'd call her some names too. She worked to keep him at bay in her mind, but he sometimes just popped up in there all leering and sneering. Right now, he was very much forefront in her mind, and she felt pissed.

The ball was coming at her now, and she wasn't even sure what happened. She just swung at the right time and hit it with such force that it sailed to the far back corner of the field. She stood there, shocked.

"RUN, EM, RUN!" Lucy practically screamed.

"Oh, yea," Emily said. She dropped the bat and sprinted. She hesitated in between second and third base, but Lucy was still shrieking at her to keep running. The whole team was freaking out with excitement now as she kept running. She looked to see the ball coming back, and she had a bad feeling she wasn't going to make it. Home base was so close, though, so she gave it her all, doing the unthinkable and lunging just as the ball headed for the person guarding the base. Her fingers touched the plate just as he caught it and reached to touch her with the ball.

"Safe!" a voice shouted.

Emily started to laugh as Team Annie whooped and hollered. She felt hands pick her up, and she was suddenly getting hugged by everyone.

"In your face!" Lucy was shouting at the other team now. "In your FACE!"

"Nice one," Nathan was beaming.

"See?" Luke said, clapping her arm with his hand. "I told you."

"I hurt," Emily told him. Her chest was feeling sore from her dive. She hoped she hadn't re-broken any of her old wounds.

"I bet," Luke nodded. "That was quite the jump. Kind of like a swan dive mixed with a frog leap."

"Shut up," Emily retorted, nudging him.

"Luke," Mei said then. "Nate and I are gonna go to a friend's get together down the road. Is that okay?"

"Yea, go," Luke waved his hand. He and Emily gathered up their stuff and headed for his truck. He noticed she was holding herself carefully, and he felt concerned that she really had hurt herself.

"Should I take you to the hospital?" he asked before helping her into the truck.

"No," she said immediately. "I'm fine."

He studied her carefully, knowing that her fear of being found would stop her from getting medical attention even if she really needed it.

"Let me see," he gestured.

"Luke, I'm fine," she insisted, holding her shirt tightly to keep it down. There was no way he was going to see all of her scars. Not right now.

"I know when a rib is broken versus bruised. It will make me feel better about not dragging your ass to the hospital," he insisted back. They were alone in the parking lot, and the truck door was hiding her anyway. She looked around, feeling nervous, before looking back at him.

"This is not how I wanted you to see it," she said.

"See what?" he asked before remembering too late. He suddenly understood.

"I just...it's not pretty," she said, faltering.

"I don't have to look," he assured her. "I just have to feel, really."

"Okay," she nodded.

"Any pain when you breathe in?" he asked her.

"A little."

He very gently slipped a hand onto her skin and up to her rib cage. He felt each rib carefully on her left side before doing her right side with his opposite hand. She inhaled sharply in pain as he pressed on one of her upper right ribs.

"I didn't feel any cracking, and you're not having excruciating pain while breathing, so I think you've just bruised it a little," he said. "But keep an eye on it, okay? I'm not a doctor."

"Okay," she agreed. They looked at each other briefly, his hands still on her skin until he realized he'd left them there. He removed them, clearing his throat as she looked away. He helped her get into his truck and shut the door behind her before getting into the driver's side. She had her eyes closed as he started it. He wondered if she was lost in a memory. He reached to put his hand over hers as he drove, and he felt her squeeze his fingers back at one point.

He was feeling a bit anxious just thinking about how they would be all alone when they got home, and he didn't know why.

...

Mei was unable to control herself when she saw Josie, the girl who had come to the diner and called her that unspeakable name and threw the smoothie at her. Josie had taken Scott, the boy Mei had huge feelings for, which Josie knew. You see, Josie used to be Mei's friend, but then she got involved with the "Mean Girls" as Nathan had dubbed them. Mei didn't recognize Josie anymore.

"What up, bitch," Mei said, slapping the drink right out of Josie's hand and sending it flying. There was a collective gasp around them and then silence. Josie narrowed her eyes at Mei.

"Back off," she said, shoving Mei hard. That was enough. It was a free for all now, and Mei didn't even know what she was doing until she felt Nathan hauling her off Josie. Sirens were outside, and suddenly police were there.

...

Emily and Luke were sitting on her porch, trying to figure out their next move when Luke's phone rang. He frowned.

"What?" Emily asked.

"It's Mei," he answered. She listened as he answered the phone. Then his face changed. She instantly felt worried.

"I'll be right there," he said, hanging up. Then he sighed.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Cops busted the party she was at."

"What?!" Emily exclaimed. She jumped to her feet. Nathan was at that party. Did the cops see Nathan? Her panic went wild. If someone recognized Nathan and somehow knew Roger, they were done for.

"It's all right," Luke said, standing as well and putting a hand on her shoulder. "I gotta go pick them up."

"If they recognize him..." she started.

"There were a bunch of kids at this party," Luke assured her. "He's fine."

"It's not that. If someone knows Roger and knows he's looking for Nathan, they'll quietly tell him, and we are screwed."

Emily was starting to hyperventilate now. She could just see it, them packing up in a rush and leaving, and she didn't want to. She liked it here. She didn't want to run again.

"Hey, hey, hey," Luke said, reaching to catch her face with his hands. "Breathe."

She tried. She really did. His hands were calming, but she kept choking a little. She held on to his arms tightly, trying to ground herself.

"I...can't..." she said thickly.

"You can," he countered. "Look at me."

She made herself look at him, and he smoothed his thumb across her right cheek.

"You and Nathan are gonna be just fine," he promised. "All right? I swear to you that I will not let anything happen to either of you."

"Okay," she whispered. Something in his voice was making her feel a little calmer.

"I've got you," he said. "I promise."

She nodded, and he released her, heading for his truck. She hugged herself as she watched him go.

...

Mei could tell Luke was pissed when he arrived. The officer standing beside her tipped his head as Luke got closer.

"You Luke?" he asked.

"That's me," Luke nodded. "What happened?" He caught sight of the other girl, and he recognized her from earlier.

"It would appear your daughter got into a fist fight with another girl here. Josie," the officer said. "It was described as a 'cat fight,' and Josie is talking about pressing charges for assault."

Luke looked at Mei, who just stared back at him with that same, defiant stare she frequently gave him over the years since the day he met her.

"Did Josie also tell you that she was in my diner earlier today and assaulted Mei? I have it on tape," Luke added. The officer frowned. This was new information to him.

"I did not know that," he said on cue. "Why didn't you call it in?"

"Because it was...what did you call it? A 'cat fight,'" Luke answered. "And I banned her for life. I figured that was punishment enough. I can change my mind, of course, if she would like."

"Stay put," the officer said, going over to Josie, who was putting on the tears.

"Luke," Mei said. "I'm sorry."

"I'll deal with you later," he replied. "Where's Nathan?"

"He split before the cops came inside. I said I'd text him when I was clear."

"Good," Luke nodded. Emily would be relieved that Nathan had been smart enough to clear out. The officer returned then.

"So, you're good to go," he said. Luke suppressed his smirk. Josie wasn't so tough when someone used her threat against her.

"Thank you," Luke said, putting his hand on Mei's shoulder to steer her to the truck.

"Just be careful next time," the officer warned, and Mei nodded. They didn't say a word until they were in Luke's truck.

"I'll text Nathan," she offered. He started the truck, not looking at her. He always knew Mei could hold her own, but it was rare that she went looking for a fight. This girl must have really riled her up earlier, and he felt sure there were other times it happened that he didn't know about. He didn't feel sorry for Josie. He felt that bullies needed a reminder that they weren't invincible sometimes.

"He'll meet us a block away," Mei said, reading her phone.

"Okay."

They found Nathan walking, and he stopped to let him in.

"You all right?" Luke asked him.

"I'm fine. Mei? Are you?" Nathan inquired, looking at her.

"Just fine."

Luke could feel her looking at him, and he knew that she knew some form of punishment was coming her way. He just didn't know what yet.

...

Emily was pacing when they got there. She ran to Nathan when he got out the back and hugged him tightly. She gripped his face, checking him over.

"I'm fine," he assured her. "I got out of there. They didn't see me."

"Thank God," she sighed, hugging him tightly again. Mei tried to sneak away, but Luke caught her.

"Grounded," he said. "For two weeks."

"No phone, no TV, no ball, no fun," Mei rhymed off.

"No chess either," Luke added.

"Fine. Is that it?"

"Yup. Go."

She handed him her phone and then walked towards the house and went inside, slamming the door behind her.

"No chess?" Emily asked. She had never heard that as a punishment before.

"When she doesn't really do much to take away, I have to get creative," Luke advised.

"I see."

"I'm going to bed," Nathan said. "I swear I'm okay."

Emily let him go, realizing she was still hanging onto him like he might disappear.

"Okay," she agreed. "Good night."

"Night."

He loped off, leaving Emily alone with Luke.

"I told you it would be okay," he said.

"You got lucky," she retorted, pointing at him.

"I wasn't always lucky," he replied, thinking about Annie. They were quiet for a moment.

"I guess I will go in," she said. "It's been quite the emotional roller coaster today."

"All right. I'll see you tomorrow?" he asked. It was her day off, so he would have to wait until the end of the day.

"You will," she smiled finally. He moved in to pull her close and kiss her softly. Then they parted ways, and Emily wished the night had gone much differently, but she'd just have to wait.

...

It was another blazing hot day. Emily was wading in the water at the small beach that was down from the usual rock she sat on. She didn't normally touch the water, but she was desperate to cool down. She looked out at it and thought back to when she was a child and loved the water. She hadn't been entirely truthful with Luke about swimming. She knew how. She had swum up until she met Roger.

The images of him holding her underwater flashed through her mind, and she clenched her fists. She had stopped because she had learned to not do anything that made you vulnerable or caught off guard.

"What is this?" Luke called, startling her and making her turn to see him standing on the shoreline. "Am I hallucinating? Dreaming?"

"I'm standing in water," she called back. "What is so weird about that?"

"Um, because you said you don't swim and hate water," he pointed out.

"I didn't say I hated it..."

"It was implied."

"I'm hot, okay? I'm just trying to cool off," she said. She blinked when he whipped off his shirt and came in to join her. What was he going to do exactly?

"You do that by actually going under the water," he gestured when he was standing beside her.

"No thanks."

Luke surveyed her, and he was pretty confident she didn't swim because of something that happened with her ex. He wasn't a stupid guy.

"You do know how, you just won't do it," he commented.

"It doesn't matter," she shrugged. He got closer to her, making her nervous.

"It does too matter," he insisted. "He can't take away everything you enjoy."

"But he did," she said quietly.

"He's not here, is he?" Luke asked. She shook her head. "Then start living, Em."

"You make it sound so easy," she said. It was the first time he'd called her Em, and she found she liked it.

"It can be," he replied. "You have that control."

He gave her a small smile before walking past her and jumping into the water. Emily watched him swim, and she felt a strong desire to join him. He had proved to her that he wasn't going to hurt her, hadn't he? He was just floating there now, looking at her.

What would it hurt? To try? She looked down at her short shorts and tank top. They'd have to do. She didn't have anything else anyway. She hesitated. She knew the only way to work through some of this stuff and move on was to face her fears.

Sensing she was having a predicament, Luke swam towards her until he could walk on bottom and continued until he was in front of her again.

"Hey," he said, putting his hands on her arms carefully. "I'm right here."

She nodded, and he took her hand. They walked side by side as it got deeper. Emily swallowed her fear. She was going to take back one thing she enjoyed today.

"You all right?" he asked when the last step would put them over their heads.

She just nodded again, and he let go of her hand. It was easy at first. She went under and felt that familiar slowing of time, heard the silence. Then, the panic set in. The water was dark, and she lost track of which way was towards the shallow end. She was disoriented, trying to find up versus down.

And then his hands were reaching for her, pulling her up. She broke the surface, spewing and coughing.

"What happened?" he asked gently. She tread water beside him, trying to separate him from the image of Roger that kept popping up.

"I felt trapped," she answered. "Even though his hand wasn't on my head, it felt like it was."

Luke felt that familiar anger inside of him at this. He didn't know what to say as she wiped her face and did some breathing. Then he got an idea.

"Come on," he said, heading back for shallow water. She wasn't sure what he was doing, but she followed anyway. When they were standing at about chest level, he stopped.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"This might be the craziest idea I've ever had, but I think it might help you," he said.

"What?"

"I read in a book once that if you can somehow go back and change what happened to you in your mind, you can get through your trauma a bit faster."

"That makes zero sense," Emily said. "I can't change anything."

"But you kind of can," he insisted. "Just hear me out." He explained the process, and she stared at him.

"You are crazy," she gestured. But a part of her was curious to see if it would actually work.

"You're thinking about it," he said, noticing.

"Okay. Yea. So what?"

"So nothing. We try it once, and if it doesn't work, we stop," he finished. Emily played with her fingers absently. Pretending he was Roger and getting control back was very appealing. She couldn't do it with the real Roger, so this was the next best thing.

"All right," she said. "Let's do it."

He surprised her by pulling her into him first. She closed her eyes as he kissed her. There was something about him that made her feel safe, and she hoped she wouldn't lose that feeling ever.

He stopped and put both his hands on her face.

"I'm not Roger," he said. "You are completely safe. You are simply role playing and getting to do what you wanted to do back then."

"Okay," she said. He had explained that was the first step, to establish she was safe and not actually reliving the incident. She was very curious as to what book this was from. It sounded like something a therapist would read.

"Whenever you're ready," he encouraged. She nodded and took in a breath, sinking under the surface. When she felt his hand on the top of her head, she panicked. After a moment, he hauled her back up.

"I'm sorry," she gasped.

"Talk to me," he urged. "Tell me what happened."

"It felt too real," she said. "I couldn't make myself believe it wasn't real."

"All right," he said, holding her close. "This wasn't a good idea." He felt bad for making it worse.

"No," she said firmly, pushing back from him. "I'm doing this. I have to get past this."

"Em..."

"I'm not leaving until I've done this," she said strongly. He knew better than to argue. He recognized her determined expression.

"Okay," he nodded. She went under again, and he reached to put his hand on the top of her head. It took about five tries before he was taken aback when she came up and twisted his hand off, shoving him back.

"No!" she shouted. He caught himself before he fell backwards. She looked mad before she really looked at him.

"You tell him," he said. She put her hands over her mouth, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry," she said.

"I knew what I signed up for. It was my idea, remember?"

"I know."

"How did that feel?"

"It felt really good."

"Good," he smiled.

Emily ran her hands through her hair and looked around. She was very surprised at how good that had felt. Luke's crazy idea actually helped her.

"You wanna punch him in the face now, don't you?" he asked, laughing a little.

"I want to inflict every kind of hurt on him I can imagine," she answered.

"I might be able to help with that," he said, moving to walk back to the shore. She followed, marveling at how in control she suddenly felt.

It felt really good, being in control. Emily didn't want to lose that feeling ever again.

"Question," Luke said when they were back at the shore.

"What's that?" she asked.

"I've always wondered...what were you writing about in your journal that day? I saw my name in there," he said. Emily felt herself go red in the face. She remembered. She'd been writing about how she couldn't stop taking peeks at him.

"A girl's journal is private," she told him.

"That's code for you were writing about your crush on me, isn't it?" he teased.

"No!"

He grabbed her and picked her up in his arms, spinning her around and making her laugh while trying to break free. These were moments she wanted to remember. These were moments she wanted to continue having. When they fell together, still laughing, she promised herself that she'd have more days like this, that she deserved it.