Thorodriel: Chapter 11
Aeweneth ran to the only place in all of Rivendell she knew to be safe and solacing. In the clearing below the darkening sky, she collapsed into the grass. Tears streaming, the young elf clutched her knees and sobbed, her shoulders shaking with the effort. Even after all these years, her father still didn't understand and the thought tore at her already fragile heart. A gentle hand touched her shoulder, and when Aeweneth looked up she met the compassionate eyes of Arwen through a cloud of tears. Biting back another sob, she looked to the ground in shame, toes curling in the grass. The Evenstar slowly ran her hands through her sister's hair, soothing her pain. For Aeweneth, the gesture was somewhat reminiscent of Celebrían and she leaned into the comforting touch.
"He doesn't understand," she explained, "even after all this time, he still doesn't understand."
Arwen sighed before gracefully lowering herself to the ground beside her sister and putting an arm around her in loving support. After some time, Aeweneth's tears slowed and her sobs lessened.
Arwen took this as a sign to speak up; "I believe he does understand. I just don't think he wants to accept it all just yet."
The dark-haired elf looked to her tearstained sister, sat rumpled and dejected among the long grass.
"I really tried this time... to explain, I mean." Aeweneth clarified, "But I think my leaving might have ruined things between us forever."
To know her sister had at least tried to mend their broken family brought Arwen hope, but even she knew their relationship could not be fully healed by a few words of repent. She sat for a few moments, watching the stars slowly appearing in the night sky and deciding on how to continue.
"He was more hurt by how you left, Aeweneth. We all were. We had come so far together and then you were just… gone." Her breath caught on the final word, choking back tears at the memory of that morning.
"No, you had all come so far," Aeweneth confessed, her voice no more than a whisper. "I was still stuck back there, never able to properly move on and constantly playing it over and over in my head. I had to get away from Rivendell- from him- just to be able to breathe again."
"And we understand that now, but even you have to admit that leaving in the middle of the night without telling anyone was stupid and selfish."
"I told Gandalf!" Aeweneth snapped, petulantly.
"Yes, but you didn't tell us!" In that moment of admonishment, Arwen looked more like Celebrían than Aeweneth could have ever imagined. Not for the first time since returning home, the young elf realised just how much she had missed of her sister's life. Arwen had matured and truly blossomed as the first lady of Rivendell.
"You sound like amil." She said, a smile playing on her lips despite the falling tears. "You've grown Arwen and I'm sorry I wasn't there to see it."
The change in conversation took Arwen aback for a moment, but she soon allowed the topic evasion after seeing the grin blooming on her sister's face.
"Yes, well so have you!" She retorted, "Back then you could barely speak to us, never mind in front of an entire room of strangers!"
Aeweneth thought back to the council meeting. What her sister said struck true, she was uncomfortable among crowds generally. And yet, she willingly stood and took her place among the fellowship. A slight feeling of pride bubbled in her chest.
"They weren't all strangers." She tried to play it off, casually. "Ada and Gandalf were there. Plus Aragorn and Legolas."
The young elf turned away on the final name, hoping her sister didn't catch the reddening of her face at the thought of the wood elf. When she looked back, however, Aeweneth noticed Arwen had not even flinched. It was clear from her face that she was, instead, focused on Aragorn. The Evenstar gazed off into the distance with worry clouding her eyes. Using her gift, only slightly, Aeweneth could see the images dancing in her sister's mind: that of death, pain, and loss. She reached out and grabbed Arwen's hand, grounding her back in reality. Soon enough, the older elf shook the darkness from her mind and Aeweneth watched as her eyes came back into focus.
"You knew this day would come muinthel, we all did."
"I know." For a moment, Arwen dropped her usual composed façade and let her posture fall. "It just feels so sudden. I just got you both back."
Aeweneth gripped her sister's hand tighter and fixed her gaze.
"I will fight by his side till the end, muinthel. I will protect him at all costs and bring him home to you. You both deserve all the happiness our world can offer. A life of love and peace." She paused and looked to the sky. Infinite stars glistened above them in the woodland clearing, blessing the sisters with their light. "I promise on my life and her spirit."
Arwen was silent, following her sister's gaze to the heavens. The pair sat among the grass, lost in thought about what the future might hold and clinging to each other's hands in uncertainty and desperation. And there, among the trees in a spot so loved by their mother, the two elves fell asleep. Both in the knowledge that tomorrow would bring new challenges and fears.
"My dear," a kind chuckle woke her. "Is it your intention to be late to every gathering?"
Aeweneth opened her eyes slowly to see a kind-faced wizard looking down at her. Realising she had probably delayed the fellowship again, she darted up and grabbed her belongings in a rush. The grass to her left was not flattened as it had been with Legolas, and the young elf realised her sister had not spent the whole night as she had. Despite this, she had a new sense of purpose surrounding the journey ahead. Not only was she fighting for her mother's memory, but now her sister had placed trust in her to protect Aragorn too. Determined to keep this vow, she followed Gandalf back to the city gates. On the path neither elf nor wizard spoke, both lost in their own thoughts about the upcoming difficulties. It wasn't until the fellowship was in sight that Aeweneth finally turned to him and asked a question that had been burning in her mind since the council meeting:
"I will have to use it, won't I? Before the end."
Gandalf paused and looked to her, almost in reprimand, "I should think so, mellon nin. It's not as though you have spent all these years away hiding from your past, hmm?" The twinkle in his eye let her know he was joking but the comment still stung. Realising this, he turned away from Aeweneth and looked towards the Lord of Rivendell who kept glancing her way, hoping to catch her eye through the crowd. "Besides, certain people need to learn that you aren't quite as fragile as you appear. As I said earlier, my dear, you belong in this fellowship."
The comment brought an honest smile to her face and, purposefully, she headed to join the gathering crowd. As she gathered her belongings and started pulling her golden hair back into a braid for the journey, a small tap on her arm caught Aeweneth's attention. The touch was so light and hesitant that she barely felt it. The young elf turned to find one of the hobbits hovering around her bags.
"Would you like to hook some things to Bill m'lady?" He said, gesturing towards the pony at the rear of the group, "Might make the journey easier and all that?"
She smiled at his thoughtfulness.
"Sam, isn't it?" The young hobbit's face began to redden in nervousness and he nodded quickly, never quite meeting her eyes. "Don't worry mellon nin," she replied, smiling in encouragement, "I travel light, but thank you for the offer."
He nodded again, face almost beetroot, before scampering away to join his companions
She was once again distracted by another voice, approaching her from behind.
"You may not be traveling as light as you think, Aeweneth."
She turned to find Elrond holding a familiar box. Carefully he slid the latch and opened it to reveal her mother's blades. As before, the sight brought tears to her eyes. She carefully lifted them from the case and strapped them alongside her old and blunting weapons. Once finished, Aeweneth looked up and deliberately met her father's eyes. His unwavering gaze warmed her heart and mended her soul, but nothing could have prepared her for his next words:
"Your amil would be proud of you."
The tears threatening at her eyes once again spilled down her cheeks and, for the first time in a millennia, she clung to her father in a tight hug. They stood there, oblivious to the world for a few moments, mourning lost time and basking in each other's comforting warmth. Aeweneth rested her head against her father's shoulder and breathed in his familiar scent. A small cough brought them both out of the reverie, and Aeweneth turned to see Aragorn and Arwen watching them with a smile. Her sister's eyes danced with delight at seeing her and her father reunited.
Elrond looked around the small gathering and soon realised the fellowship was prepared to leave. Hesitantly, he stepped away from his daughter and returned to the role of leader. Aeweneth grabbed her things and walked over to join her companions, fitting in beside Gandalf and Aragorn where she felt most comfortable. Her father took a moment to survey the group, nodding his head slowly in acceptance before beginning.
"The Ringbearer is setting out on the quest of Mount Doom and you who travel with him, no oath nor bond is laid to go further than you will. Farewell. Hold to your purpose and may the blessings of elves, and men, and all free folk go with you." Upon saying this, Elrond raised his hand ceremoniously, gesturing for them to leave.
Taking this as their cue, Gandalf called for Frodo to lead the way: "The Fellowship awaits the Ringbearer."
One by one, the group followed the burdened hobbit and left through the great elvish gates. Just as she was about to take those first steps herself, Aeweneth turned and caught Aragorn's long glance towards Arwen. Looking to her father, whose expression was filled with worry and heartache, she knew he had also seen the yearning gaze between her sister and Estel. She thought back to the promise she had made earlier, and the vow solidified in her heart.
"I will protect him ada. I promise."
Elrond's eyes darted to her in surprise and a mournful smile graced his face, "Protect Aragorn as best you can Aeweneth, but not with your life. I cannot lose you again."
Aeweneth nodded in acceptance of her father's blessing and followed her companions on the journey to Mordor.