Chapter 12: Euphoria

Olivia's Journal 18th of May 2017

The last two weeks have been a nightmare, a nightmare I could not awake from. I prayed and prayed for salvation and for the all mighty lord to cleanse me of such poison that courses in my veins and taints my soul. If only I knew what it was that was doing this to me and it wasn't desperation or contradiction, it was my own stupidity and ignorance that caused this. I am where I need to be and I'm getting the help that I need, from people that understand the intricacies of the human brain. Only they can understand what's wrong with me and help me with my condition.

"Jeremy," elated Olivia.

"Liv," exclaimed Jeremy.

Olivia ran in her slippers towards Jeremy who stood up from a table and smiled ecstatically as he opened up his arms and Olivia flew into them. Wrapping her arms around Jeremy, throwing her lips on his and gave him a long kiss before embracing him tightly and resting her chin on his shoulder.

"I missed you so much, Jeremy," breathed Olivia.

"I missed you too, Liv. I was so worried about you," cried Jeremy.

Olivia released Jeremy and noticed his right hand was bandaged, it looked like he was wearing a white mitten.

"Jeremy, what happened to your hand?"

Jeremy feeling reluctant to tell her, took a deep breath and then divulged to Olivia what happened, "When I left after overhearing you and Isabel, I lost my temper and punched a wall. I broke my hand."

Olivia gasped in horror and lamented, "Jeremy I'm so sorry, it was all my fault."

"No Liv, it's not your fault, it's my fault for overreacting," demurred Jeremy, "Look why don't we sit down and talk about it?"

Olivia held the tears in her eyes and accepted Jeremy's offer as they both sat down at the table.

"I should have told you Jeremy, I should have told you everything," sniffed Olivia.

"You mean about Kobe?" assumed Jeremy.

"Jeremy, I can assure you it was only a kiss we shared. We got so drunk and before I knew it, I was kissing him. I don't know why, I just needed solace and he just happened to be there. We didn't have sex if that's what you thought."

"Liv, I know. Laura told me about it, after I calmed down that was."

"Kobe loves Laura, well I don't know if he still does, but back then he couldn't take his eyes off her."

"Yeah, I can only imagine. Anyway, Laura and Isabel told me everything. Everything I overheard and I understand what you went through. Maybe not know how you feel, but why you acted the way you did."

Olivia placed her hand on Jeremy's to express sorrow for what he was about to bring up.

"Jeremy please, he means nothing to me. I regret ever meeting him and falling for his trickery."

Jeremy frowned, unsure what Olivia was trying to say.

"What do you mean?"

"The man who I met in the club and had sex in the mens."

"Liv, that's not what was on my mind. Well they told me about your one night stand, but that's not what I was about to say. I was about to say that Laura and Isabel found the letter from the doctor's, which confirmed that you were still on meds and you've not been taking your pills."

Olivia hung her head down in shame, feeling really embarrassed.

"I knew it was a silly thing to do and it's what got me here."

"Liv," consoled Jeremy, taking both her hands, "I've been there before and I know how serious and hazardous it can be to not take your medication. I myself am still on medication and I know it's for my own good that I stay on my meds before I get word from my doctor that I can quit taking them."

"Don't worry Jeremy, I take my meds now. It took time getting used to it, but I can tell you it's nowhere near as bad as shock therapy."

Jeremy's chair skidded back making and frowned.

"You underwent shock therapy?"

"Yeah, as soon as I got here it was one of the first things I was given as treatment. If only I could tell you how painful it was. I almost lost my lunch."

Jeremy and Olivia both laughed, which lightened their mood and they looked endearingly into each other's eyes.

"Thought I'd let you know I've got a play coming up in seven days time. I'm not sure whether you'd be fit for release anytime soon."

"Well I'm still getting regular check ups from my psychiatrist, but I've made really good progress and a speedy recovery, so I'm sure I can make it out in time to see your play."

Olivia smiled confidently at Jeremy, which put a smile back on his face.

"I sure hope so, we are doing Hairspray and I'm going to be playing Corny Collins."

"Oh really? I've only seen the film. I've always wanted to see what it's like on stage."

"We even got some new recruits so I can only imagine it's going to be one hell of a show and plus, I need you as support. Of course Samantha misses you, so does Kathy and the rest of the gang."

"I miss them too. I really want to do something together with them again. Kind of like Samantha's birthday."

Jeremy chuckled and reminded, "Okay but no booze for you this time. You're on medication."

"I know I know, I haven't forgotten how hung over I was. I think I can enjoy a night out without booze."

Jeremy smiled and patted Olivia's hand and praised, "Good girl."

A nurse entered the room and gave the announcement that visiting time will conclude with 5 minutes.

"Jeremy, I... I think that," despaired Olivia, knowing that visiting time was coming to an end.

"I know Liv, I got the message. Think I better be going now, but I'll come again next week. Well after your parents visit of course," said Jeremy.

"I'll look forward to it," smiled Olivia.

Jeremy and Olivia stood up and embraced each other tightly, followed by a long passionate kiss.

While Jeremy still had his hands on Olivia's hips, he impulsively professed, "I love you, Liv." Olivia in response frowned at Jeremy, which gave Jeremy the idea she disapproves, "Sorry that came out, I didn't mean to say it. It's too soon and..."

Olivia shook her head with a smile and said, "I love you too, Jeremy."

"You do? I mean wow... I just thought that. Ah it doesn't matter. You love me and I love you and..."

"Jeremy, I think it's time to go."

"You're going to be okay, Liv? You don't get lonely?"

"I never get lonely. I'll be fine, don't worry about me. I'll be out in time to see your play, I promise."

"Cool, well I better go and rehearse."

Jeremy and Olivia smiled at each other and kissed again before Jeremy seperates and heads for the exit, not without turning to look at Olivia and remark, "You look cute in pajamas."

Olivia blushed and laughed at Jeremy's statement as she happily watched him walk past security and disappear down the corridor where he was escorted out. Feeling happy and optimistic after Jeremy's visit, Olivia smelt dinner in the canteen in the next room and felt hungry, having a big enough appetite for seconds.

Olivia's Journal 23rd May 2017

The day I feared had come, the day I knew I could never be prepared to face, the day my parents came to visit. I hadn't seen them since Christmas, when I came to visit them in New Jersey and here they were in California coming to see me in a clinic. The news about me being checked into the madhouse scared the pants off of them, but not before being forced to show them the scar on my arm. How it went on for a while without my parents knowing about my suicide attempt is beyond me. I only begged for Laura and Isabel to keep my suicide attempt a secret. Now I was sitting face to face with them, I would reluctantly show them my scar, which they were informed about before they came in. Their reaction was exactly as I imagined, they were horrified to see how serious the scar looked and how close I was to dying. My mother needed a moment to shed tears before being able to talk to me and press me for some answers why I did it. Despite the rebuking I would get (because I'm catholic and it's a sin to commit suicide), my parents still showed me support and how much care they had for me, even offering me to come back home with them. This I declined, but I promised them I would never do something so stupid again. They believed me like any parent wants to believe their child after they made a vow, but I could tell by the look in their eyes they were still worried about me. My parents expressed their tearful byes and left to catch their flight back to New Jersey, but not without promising them I would be seeing them this Christmas like I do every year.

Olivia's Journal 24th May 2017

One thing I haven't written about was my stay in the clinic, maybe this is the best time to write about how safe and secure I have felt ever since I checked in. It's kind of like a summer camp, but of course you're indoors for most of the time and you have to follow rules, strict rules. The nurses were tough cookies and didn't tolerate any outbursts and disobeying the rules, otherwise you would spend the rest of the day in a padded cell wearing a straitjacket.

One thing I must address is that I never skip medication, not that it's not easy to since we are dispensed medication as part of our daily routine. We have to swallow our pills in front of the nurse so they know we took them. If we didn't, well I can only imagine other ways we would be forced to take them and I'm not talking about oral consumption. We even take therapy groups where we get to discuss our problems and our tragic backstories why we round up here. There are movie nights and we get to have snacks while watching movies. Sometimes we got to watch Disney films, but quite often we were shown Charlie Brown cartoons, I always did like his dog Snoopy, such an adorable pup he was and his friend Woodstock too. Also another thing we got to do was go on field trips, we would take the bus and be allowed out in the open, but on close supervision. My whole stay so far reminds me of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. I've only seen the film once, but I do know Laura talks about the book a lot, in fact it's one of her favorite books. The only thing I remember in the film is Jack Nicholson making friends with the big muscular Native American who pretends to be a mute. Of course who could forget the lobotomy at the end, such a haunting scene.

The other patients I got acquainted with fast and I have to say they seem to be nice enough people. One of them was my age and we are both female, so it really made me feel less lonely and someone I could relate to. It almost felt like having another Laura, Isabel or even another Samantha. Her name was Kayleigh and her and I both connected because she's from New Jersey too. She was checked into a clinic after suffering a mental breakdown, which was the result of boyfriend who turned out to be a conman and left her destitute and heartbroken. We would mainly spend time playing boardgames or card games or we would just hang out and chat and talk about our personal lives. She was intrigued to know about my boyfriend and I told her about how much I missed him, without giving away too much information about her romance which could make her jealous.

One highlight in our friendship was when she played music on her iPod docking station, she played Diana Ross' Chain Reaction. I'm not a fan of oldies, but this however got me into the groove and I enjoyed its upbeat tune and lyrics. Kayleigh and I both danced to the music together feeling ecstatically happy. Sure I didn't dance like Samantha or Kathy, but I didn't care, I just wanted to dance. It is true when they say the power of music heals emotional wounds. After we were tired from dancing, we both made a promise that we would keep in touch when we both got out. Of course she would be going back to New Jersey and I promised I would come and visit her for Christmas, maybe we could have Christmas dinner together.

Olivia's Journal 27th May 2017

Today is the day of my discharge from the funny farm, it's been a pleasant stay, but tonight is Jeremy's play and I want to be there. I have already filled in the endless tedious amounts of paperwork and I hoped my final assessment will deem me fit to be released. It pains me to think what would happen if I don't pass my final checkup and my stay will be extended and have to miss out on Jeremy's play. I would really hate to see his face knowing I was unable to attend, then again the idea of not knowing how he would feel I find even more unsettling, an image I don't want to see or imagine.

It can't be described how nervous I feel and hearing what the final decision is, it's like being in front of a judge or parole board, not that I'd know what it feels like. Either way this was a nail biting scenario where the outcome would determine where I'll be sleeping tonight, in a hospital bed or my bed with Jeremy by my side.

"Cheer up Jeremy, it's going to be a great show," encouraged Samantha as she gave Jeremy a nudge.

"I know, it's just I really want Liv to be here to see me perform," despaired Jeremy, looking sad into the mirror.

"Me too Jeremy, I really wish Liv was here to see this. Unfortunately we have a play to perform and we can't let those who came to see us down. We have to give it our all."

Jeremy took a deep breath and tried his best to think positive.

"You're right Sam, it's like what they say. No matter what happens the show must go on."

"That's more like it Jeremy, lets give these guys a show," praised Samantha, slapping her hand on Jeremy's shoulder.

"Okay everyone it's show time," announced the director, as he poked himself through the dressing room where Jeremy and Samantha were.

"This is it, time to break a leg," squealed Samantha, hopping up and down excited to perform. She skipped out the dressing room to join the others backstage, leaving Jeremy to look at his reflection one more time. Lamenting over the thought Olivia couldn't make it tonight, he put on a lively smile and thought big, trying to not let Olivia's absence affect his performance.

Jeremy left the dressing room and joined the other performers waiting behind the curtains ready to go on stage. Samantha was peeking from behind the curtains and looked back to see Jeremy, displaying a joyous and elated smile.

"Jeremy, you're not going to believe this," squeaked Samantha, hopping towards Jeremy, taking his hand and dragging him to peek behind the curtains.

Jeremy stuck his head out of the curtains and saw the audience. A lot of people came, which he assumed Samantha was referring to, but subsequently he would discover someone in the audience caught his eye and was precisely why Samantha was excited by who she saw was in the audience. There in the middle row, looking spruced and happy to be there was Olivia, she had made it after all and was looking excited to see the show that was about to begin any moment. This sight rejuvenated Jeremy's spirits and gave him the incentive he needed to go on stage and get in character. He couldn't wait to see the look on Olivia's face when she sees him in the audience and he performs for her.
The music for the musical number "The Nicest Kids in Town" starts playing and the backup dancers rush onto the stage and Jeremy casually walks on the stage with Samantha who's playing the part of Amber. Jeremy acts like he's getting ready for camera, doing some last minute check ups and dousing his hair with hairspray. He then delivers his greetings to the audience and then starts singing and dancing while looking directly at Olivia who was smiling at him profusely and bashfully.

Olivia was getting into the rhythm and beat of the song and mostly hearing her boyfriend sing with such zeal and bravura. She even enjoyed seeing the skill and efficiency of the dancers and noticed one of them dancing was Samantha wearing a blonde wig, she was playing the antagonist, Amber. The next scene had Kathy and an unidentified actress, whose name Olivia did not know, but assumed it was an actor who recently joined the course. It amused Olivia to see Kathy wearing a fat suit and black wig, obviously playing the main protagonist, Tracy. Jessie played Tracy's mother, Edna. Jessie was dressed in drag, which made Olivia giggle about how comical Jessie looked and talked. David played the part of Link Larkin, who is Tracy's love interest. It intrigued Olivia to know whether there was going to be a love scene between him and Kathy, knowing David is presumably gay. Maybe he wasn't gay, maybe he was bi and he dressed metrosexual. Throughout the whole play it surprised Olivia to see how Samantha can turn herself in the spoilt teen, knowing Samantha was nothing like that in real life.

The show ended and everyone including Olivia applauded loudly and enthusiastically as all actors took to the stage and bowed. Jeremy had his eyes on Olivia the whole time and was happy to see how she smiled and applauded at him, even air-kissing him. Olivia waited for everyone in the audience to leave as she remained seated and would sneak backstage to approach Jeremy. Walking past other actors out of costume and back in their normal clothes and hearing chatter in a room with lights on, Olivia assumed it was the dress room and slowly opened the door to see Jeremy talking fervently to his co-stars. Jeremy turned his head to see Olivia at the door who was smiling and opening her arms to him.

"Liv," bursted Jeremy, running towards Olivia and wrapping his arms around her. He picked her up and spun her round, before hugging her tightly and kissing her vehemently on the lips. "Oh I missed you so much, baby."

"I missed you too, shovelface," exclaimed Olivia, playfully nicknaming him.

After Olivia and Jeremy kissed and let their reunion sink in, Olivia saw Samantha smiling at her. Olivia and Samantha embrace and have a small conversation about how they've been. Olivia even praised Samantha for her performance, which flattered Samantha and was thankful for her positive feedback.

Jeremy cleared his throat just to get Olivia's attention and asked, "Are you ready to go?"

"Oh sweetie are you going so soon?" wondered Samantha, acting disappointed.

"I would love to stay, but we should get together some time, maybe lunch next week," offered Olivia.

"I would love that," smiled Samantha.

Olivia and Samantha hug again before separating and Olivia leaves with Jeremy.

Olivia and Jeremy walked back to Olivia's apartment together, while holding hands and chatting away about the show. Jeremy receives praise from Olivia on his performance and how blown away she was, which Jeremy responds by saying he couldn't have done it without her. Olivia feeling touched by Jeremy's statement, bestows him with another kiss.

When Olivia and Jeremy make it back to the seemingly quiet apartment, Jeremy suggests having a non-alcoholic beverage, which Olivia gleefully obliges and the first thing that catches her eye in the kitchen was a bundle of pink roses in a glass vase, with a pink box of chocolates with a pink ribbon wrapped around it.

"Oh Jeremy you didn't," astonished Olivia, pacing towards the table to take a whiff of the roses. Indulging the sweet aroma of the roses, Olivia then turned her attention to the box of chocolates, which made a gasp with awe. Olivia hugged the box to her chest, turned around, skipped towards Jeremy, wrapped her arms around him and kissed him. "Thank you," whispered Olivia, hugging him tight.

Olivia released Jeremy and stepped back to lean against the table, while smiling seductively at him. She puts her hands underneath her skirt and pulls down her underwear, letting her panties slide down her legs. Grabbing the panties off her foot, she flung them in his face. Jeremy laughed, taking the panties in his hands and watching Olivia strip off her tight black v-top shirt, exposing her bra. Jeremy took off his shirt and approached Olivia to grab her in his arms and kiss her. He unhooked her bra and let it fall to the floor. Olivia broke away from Jeremy and raced Jeremy to her room giggling as Jeremy grabbed her from behind and grabbed her naked breasts and kissed her neck.

"What on earth is going on here?" astounded Isabel, standing in the corridor with her eyes bulging out and mouth wide open. Gustavo was behind Isabel and had the same expression on his face.

Olivia and Jeremy froze and just looked at Isabel and Gustavo staring at the awkward spectacle. It was embarrassing for Olivia to see that Isabel and Gustavo could see Jeremy's hands covering and squeezing her breasts, she covered her breasts with her arms while Jeremy stood half naked behind her and tried to appear normal.

"Oh hey Isabel, you caught us at a bad time," greeted Olivia, "I thought nobody was home."

"Yeah well looks like it's just us and our bos," confirmed Isabel.

"Where's Laura?"

"Her and Marina are in Berlin."

"Berlin, why did they go to Berlin for?"

"Who knows? From what I remember they went to see some I don't know, historian or I think he's a demon-thingy. How should I know? Just some guy obsessed with the occult and the mysterious, you know like Mulder from the X Files kind of guy."

"Oh right. What would Laura and Marina want with an occultist slash historian?"

"Beats me. I know it's his birthday tomorrow, so I guess they were generous enough to book a flight to Germany just to see him and wish him happy birthday."

"It's Marina's birthday in two days time, she's invited you two to join," announced Gustavo.

"Wow that's nice, guess we'll have to figure out what to get her" responded Jeremy.

After a moment's silence, Isabel nodded and bossed, "Well anyway you two, do what you have to do, but do it in your room if you don't mind."

Olivia and Jeremy retired to Olivia's room where they both agreed that the moment wasn't good for sex and they wanted to have more privacy. The first thing did before Olivia got herself ready for bed was remember to take her medication. Ever since she was in an institute did she feel the negative effects of being on anti-depressants did she slowly begin to feel accustom to them again. Still she would experience stages of paranoia when they begun to take effect, but she hoped being in bed with Jeremy would alleviate the bad side effects and help her sleep that night.

Olivia courageously takes a pill and swallows it down her gullet, gets into bed with Jeremy and hugs him tight and thinks happy thoughts.

Olivia's Journal 29th May 2017

Today is the day that not only does Laura come back home, but also it's Marina's birthday today. Marina and I might not have been the best of friends, but we always tried to keep it civil and friendly. I would even go as far as admitting I like her with Laura better than when Laura was with Tyler.

It was also interesting to know that the party will be at the same place where Laura had hers. I really liked that restaurant, the scenery was nice, the food was great and the service was appeasing. It's going to be a bigger party than Laura's because Marina has the generosity to not only invite Tyler, but also his new girlfriend who I never met before. It's like what they say, the more the merrier. Yeah I guess the more guests Marina invites, it will be a cool party, a real killer.

Olivia rode with Jeremy, Isabel, Gustavo in Kobe's car as he drove them in his Toyota. Stepping into the beach-side restaurant again struck Olivia with a sweet sense of nostalgia and what a wonderful night it was. They were the first ones there and were guided to their table by a server. Tyler and his girlfriend, Melissa, arrived subsequently afterwards. Tyler took the time to introduced Melissa to everyone who shyly but warmly greeted everyone. Melissa reminded Olivia of Marina, seeing she was roughly the same height as her and acted timid. Olivia couldn't help but sympathize with Melissa, even tried to make her feel welcome by asking her a few questions, which she cordially answers.

Laura's mother, Caroline, arrives. She's accompanied by a man her age who is dark skinned and has dark hair. He has broad shoulders and big strong looking hands, almost resembling the military type with his sturdy posture. When Olivia shook his hand, she could really feel his tight grip, corroborating Olivia's suspicion that he really was a strong one.

Finally after a small amicable conversation the last two arrive, Laura and the birthday girl herself, Marina. Everyone including Olivia clapped and Gustavo implemented a wolf-whistle and sprightly complimented Marina's exquisite and titivated appearance, which Olivia did sort of envy. Olivia greeted Marina with a hug and wished her happy birthday sincerely and enthusiastically, feeling no bitterness or animosity towards her former rival.

Everyone begun the party with a drink of white wine, on the exception of Olivia and Jeremy who settled on a glass of house lemonade. During the social event, Olivia and Jeremy held hands, Jeremy even placed his hand on Olivia's leg. Jeremy would along with Gustavo try to steal the show by challenging each other to who could pull off the best antics or tell the best jokes. This little show of theirs did not only captivate the attention of everyone around the table, but other guests in the restaurant turned their attention to see the two clowns. Olivia broke up the show by slapping Jeremy's behind and told him to sit down because food was coming and it's time to eat.

After the main course came the birthday cake, which lit the dim lit room like a guiding torch. Marina was amazed by the sight of the birthday cake placed before her as she struggled to draw enough breath to blow out the candles. Everyone got a piece of the cake and would then proceed to give Marina testimonies in her honor. Although everyone else had more to say about Marina, Olivia tried to think of some nice to say to Marina. It didn't have to be long, just something complimentary and something that will please Marina. Olivia was surprised to see Isabel come up with something flattering and poetic, knowing she warmed up to Marina before she did.

When it was Olivia's turn (assuming it was her turn) Olivia held her glass and toasted, "Here's to Marina, the girl that made me believe that being mysterious is a good thing and that it's okay to be gay. Oh and if I must patronize you, I'll say you making Laura happy taught me to pursue my own happiness, with Jeremy here of course." Marina smiled at Olivia's kind words and so did Jeremy who kissed Olivia on the cheek and Olivia responded, "Jeremy, not in front of my friends." Everyone looks at Olivia grinning mischievously and Olivia assumes they were going to bring up the idea about getting married, as Olivia deplores, "Don't get any bright ideas."

The restaurant was closing and the tab was already paid as everyone got ready to leave. Kobe who only had two glasses of white wine to drink and then sobered up with soda, would still volunteer to be the designated driver. Gustavo, Isabel, Olivia and Jeremy rode in his Toyota after wishing Marina one last happy birthday before leaving her with Laura.
Kobe stopped at Olivia and Isabel's apartment as Olivia and Jeremy would step out. Olivia would notice that Isabel remained in the Toyota with Gustavo and Kobe.

"You're not coming too Isabel?" perplexed Olivia.

"Nah, I'm going to spend the night with Gustavo and Kobe. Tonight you and Jeremy can have the place to yourselves," grinned Isabel, signifying that she's expecting what Olivia and Jeremy plan to do now they are alone and have the apartment to themselves.

Jeremy and Olivia watched the Toyota drive off, then they looked at each other with eager hankering smiles on their faces. They both rushed into the apartment, slipped their shoes off and started to peel off their clothes and dump them in the corridor. Jeremy followed Olivia into her room only wearing his underwear. He entered the room to see Olivia on the bed with her breasts exposed and in the process of removing her panties.

Jeremy stripped off his underwear rendering him naked and would climb on the bed and peel Olivia's panties off her leg. He then lay on top of Olivia and kissed her before slowly and gently inserting himself into her. Olivia gave off an orgasmic squeal and held Jeremy tight as he begun to thrust slowly and gently while looking at Olivia with her eyes closed and silently orgasming. Jeremy already experiencing the warm sensual pleasure inside Olivia, begun to feel the carnal pleasure, which made him climax. Exhausted and panting after making love to his girlfriend, Jeremy hovered over Olivia's face to bestow her with loving tender kisses. Jeremy lay his head on Olivia's chest while Olivia massaged Jeremy's hair as they both cerebrate over the intense sensuous pleasure they luxuriated in.

After only five minutes of silence and napping together, Jeremy removes his head off Olivia's chest to look her in her bright benevolent blue eyes.

"Wow that was amazing," marveled Jeremy.

"Me or your dick inside me?" asked Olivia sarcastically.

"Of course I meant you, Liv. I know they say pussy is pussy, but I wouldn't trade you for any pussy in the whole world."

"That's very sweet of you, Jeremy." Olivia ruffled Jeremy's hair before asking him, "There's something I've been meaning to ask you."

"Well shoot Liv, I'm an open book," smiled Jeremy.

"Do you ever wonder if your life would be different?"

Jeremy frowned before asking ",What do you mean different?"

"Like if you would have went to jail for assault or if you didn't agree to come to the States."

"Liv."

"No I'm serious Jeremy. I ask myself nearly all the time what if I turned you away and we never got together or if I died and I wasn't around here today? Maybe I wouldn't have..."

"Liv, stop it... stop it now, okay," rebuked Jeremy firmly with his eyes rolled at Olivia. "You can have regrets that's completely normal, but you can't keep asking yourself what if and what could have been. What's happened has happened and you got to leave that in the past. We live in the now and we are blessed to have come together and live in this moment. If you really want to know what I think about what if I had gone to jail for assault, I don't want to know. Is the one who I permanently blinded in one eye still bitter and vengeful towards me knowing he didn't get justice? Also, what deal did my dad make with his family or have to go through in order for me to be let go by the judge and walk out of court a freeman? I don't know and quite frankly I don't want to know. I can't undo what I did, especially what I wish I could undo, but I can't. It's something I have to learn to live with. I attempted suicide, but failed and there was a reason why I failed and I'm glad I failed. If I succeeded then I would never have met you."

"That one night stand and that fling with Kobe. It didn't mean anything. That one night stand was a mistake and Kobe doesn't mean anything, he's just a friend."

"Liv, whatever you have to say about your one night stand or whatever his name is, don't. Oh and your fling with Kobe, I'd rather not know. I don't need to know and I don't want to know. It happened okay? End of."

"I was so worried about you, you seemed really angry and I was worried you were going to get violent or I was going to get violent with you."

"Liv, one thing you must know about me is just because I get angry and got violent one time doesn't that is who I am. That's why I fled, I knew it was the best thing to do. And another thing you need to understand," Jeremy pauses and looks Olivia deep into her eyes, "I would never ever ever hurt you. I would never raise my fist on you or do anything to physically hurt you. You're a lady and I don't hit ladies or any human for that matter."

"But you'll punch a wall?"

"Okay it was a silly thing to do and I overreacted, but please don't think of me badly, Liv."

Olivia moved her hand to stroke Jeremy's stomach muscles with her fingers.

"I don't think of you badly, Jeremy. I just don't know how we're going to make this work without all this inconvenience and our own raw negative emotions getting in the way."

"We'll pull through them, Liv. We'll do it together. All I want is to make one thing clear. I don't want to live in the past, I want to leave it behind and live in the moment right here right now. I want it to be with you Liv, I want us to work together and help each other overcome our traumas and psychological issues. Just us, two brave little souls who fight through the darkness until we find light, a light that we can revel in and guide us to heaven, our heaven our salvation our romance."

"Oh Jeremy, you are so sweet and poetic," cooed Olivia, stroking Jeremy's face.

Jeremy smiled and quipped, "But who's more sweet, me or the chocolates?"

Olivia frowned confusingly, but then reverted back to her amorous face. She lightly punched Jeremy in the arm and answered, "Of course I mean you, silly. Well the chocolates were nice, but you were..." Olivia's face turned to shock as she just remembered something, "Oh shit, I haven't taken my medication"

"Don't panic Liv, it's not too late," soothed Jeremy, while watching Olivia rummage through the draw on her side of the bed.

"I think my pills are on your side of the bed, please check the draw please," requested Olivia.

"Of course Liv." Jeremy pulled open the draw from his side of the bed and found Olivia's pills. Unscrewing the top of the tube container, he took out one pill. Olivia rolled out her tongue as Jeremy placed the pill in her mouth.

Swallowing the pill down her gullet, Olivia took Jeremy's hand and requested, "I need you to hold me Jeremy. These pills still make me giddy and a little anxious and I need you for comfort."

"Of course Liv, I'm always here for you when you need me."

Olivia and Jeremy broke into kissing and lay back on the bed. Olivia turned off the light and would resume kissing Jeremy. Feeling exhausted and having heavy eyelids, they both tried to get some sleep, but not before exchanging words everyone wants to hear their lover say.

"I love you, Jeremy," whispered Olivia jittery.

"I love you too, Liv," whispered Jeremy, giving his girlfriend a kiss on the head before closing his eyes and falling asleep.

Olivia slept peacefully and harmoniously, only to receive the chivalrous voice of Jeremy in her ear.

"Are you awake, princess?"

"Don't call me princess," moaned Olivia, with her eyes still closed.

"Sorry, how about Sleeping Beauty?"

"She's a princess."

"And a prince wakes up his princess with a kiss."

Jeremy audaciously kissed Olivia's lips and she backs away and immediately opens her eyes.

"You asshole, Jeremy," admonished Olivia, lightly slapping him in her face, which didn't wipe the sly mischievous smile off Jeremy's face. Olivia ran her fingers through Jeremy's hair and then down his neck.

"You know I'm hungry, I think it's time for breakie," said Jeremy.

"Sounds good, you're the one cooking," conceded Olivia, jumping out of bed and walking to the door denude of clothing, "Don't know about you, but I'm going to eat naked, you should do the same."

Olivia exited through the door looking back at Jeremy with a seductive smile and a wink. Jeremy felt compelled and jumped out of bed to join Olivia in the kitchen.

Jeremy made breakfast burritos which consisted of avocado, sliced tomatoes, scrambled eggs and onion. Olivia happily ate her burrito, but made a mess. She ended up licking her fingers, which Jeremy found cute. Jeremy then proceeded to wash up and handed Olivia and wet towel to wipe herself.

"So Jeremy, how do you rate my pussy compared to all the pussy you fucked?" asked Olivia boldly.

"Well that's appropriate after breakfast talk," responded Jeremy.

"What's the matter, can't your full stomach handle sex talk?"

"If you must know, that was my first time."

Olivia nearly choked on the coffee she tipped down her throat as she slammed down her mug and questioned, "What you were a virgin?"

"Yep."

"Wow and you didn't need me to put it in for you."

"I know what a vagina is and how it works, teach."

"Teach, is that the best insult you can come up with? Why don't you say that to my hole why don't you?"

Jeremy looked at Olivia, smiled and wisecracked, "Which one?"

"Which one would you like to talk to? I have three."

"One is for kissing, one is for fucking and the other is for... well you get the idea."

"What you want to fuck me in the ass?"

Jeremy laughed and replied with, "Well I don't know, might be a little tight I imagine."

"Do you think about fucking me in the ass?"

"I erm... I don't know."

Olivia smirked as she saw below Jeremy's waist and could see he was getting aroused by the idea.

"Ha ha look what we have here, someone's getting turned on," grinned Olivia, "Well guess what you dirty bastard... I don't do anal. So you can tell your chubby friend he ain't going where the sun don't shine."

"The sun doesn't shine where he was yesterday."

"You really think you're so clever don't you, Jeremy. Well then," Olivia gets off her chair and approaches Jeremy seductively. She puts her hand on Jeremy's erect penis and stimulates him while proposing, "I'm going to go and hit the shower and if your friend Woody-Woodpecker will be a good boy, you can both come in the shower with me and have fun, deal?"

Jeremy unable to answer Olivia right away already aroused and sexually excited answers, "Sure Liv, he'll be a good boy."

Olivia removes her hand from Jeremy's genitals and says, "Good."

Olivia kisses Jeremy's lip and cunningly lightly bites his lip. She takes Jeremy's hand and leads him to the shower.

To be continued...