Kass flew like the wind to Hateno, praying he got there before that other Rito. The distress call had worried him, and seeing the Yiga was what made him land in the first place. He touched down at the front gate, scanning for an appropriate young woman to aid him. He spotted the perfect girl coming from the inn.
"Excellent!" He muttered. He rushed over. "Pardon me, this is a terrible emergency! I need your help at once!"
"Oh! Oh my! Are you alright!? Is someone hurt!?"
"Not yet, but people could be. Come, I'll explain on the way!" As he led her through town, he hastily told her everything he knew. By the time they got to the right house, he was waiting for her response.
"You want me," The woman gasped, "to act like the wife of some random Rito and pretend some random baby is my daughter just to save him and a Gerudo from the king's Yiga soldiers!?"
"Uh... Yes?" Kass barely missed the rake swung at his head. He was thankful for the nice trim however.
"HEEEEEEEELP! This birdman is CRAAAAAAZY!!" Screeched the woman as she ran away. She comically tripped over a nearby rock and flung herself into the pond below. Kass raced to the edge to check that she was ok. She surfaced with a bass tangled into her hair by some lilly pads and pond weeds. The bass repeatedly smacked her in the face with its tail as she scrambled to remove it and continue running. She disappeared around the ridge, still screaming and fighting with her new, smelly, violent hat.
"Well. We're plucked." Kass sighed. Then, he got an idea. He ran into the house to prepare. Thank Hylia the door wasn't locked.
"Ah home!" Revali exclaimed. He approached the house, praying that other Rito had come through.
"Wait a minute, this sign says: "Link's House." Isn't that the name of the famed champion? He was said to own a house here..." The footsolider pointed out. There was an accusing air in his words.
"He did use to own a house here but he..." Urbosa stammered. They hadn't thought about that part. Revali quickly came to her aid.
"He sold it to me after he married Zelda and moved to the castle. I kept the sign as an homage to him after I heard our king defeated him in battle."
"Oh. I suppose that adds up."
"Indeed. Now, come in and rest. I'm sure my wiiiii-" Revali's beak dropped.
"Brother! There you are! You just missed Saria; she went on her annual pilgrimage to the Spring of Power! She'll be gone for at least five days!" Kass, now dressed like a merchant, cawed. "What took you so long, Komali!? You had your old brother Kass worried sick."
"Oh, well, we got stopped by a patrol looking for a couple infants. They were interested in little Medley, and didn't believe me when I told them I married Saria." Revali played off his shock like a pro, careful to remember the names the other Rito had made up. He also gave Liz a fake name, just to be safe. Urbosa made a mental note to remember names too.
"Ugh; I'll let it slide once Komali. Once! Now you and your manager should go wash up. Dinner's almost done." Kass said. "As for you two gentlemen, please join us for dinner."
"No, I don't think we will. We've wasted enough time already. Come on, let's just go on to the next town." The footsolider grumbled.
"What? Why? What if this is the kid we're looking for?" The blademaster asked. His compatriot sighed.
It isn't, Goron breath. The kid we want is named Liz. Besides, if they had the kid, they wouldn't draw attention to them or be so confident about having them around us. We're wasting our time on the wrong family. Now come on; we only have a few days left."
"Fine. Let's go." The two Yiga vanished with a gesture, transporting themselves back to the castle.
Once Revali made sure they were gone for good, he turned to the other Rito.
"I'm so sorry to drag you into that. Thank you for your help, mister..."
"Kass. No problem my friend. I'm just glad I could help."
"Revali, and this is baby Liz and my friend Urbosa." Revali gestured to the girls, who were getting situated at the table. Kass blinked.
"You're named after the champions?" There was a beat. Urbosa and Revali looked at each other, silently deciding their next move.
"... Is that a bad thing? To be named for great heroes that sacrificed everything for the kingdom?"
"No! Goodness no. I just never met a Rito with that name before."
"The two of us and a few others were raised in an orphanage, just on the border of Old Termina." Urbosa blurted out. "I was dropped off by some pirates as a baby. Revali had been mistaken for a cucco egg in the wild. Our pal Daruk was rescued by some miners, and with him came Mipha, who had gotten tangled in a net. We all became fast friends as we grew and decided to take the champions' names because they were our heroes. We just got to Hyrule ten years ago."
"So where did the baby come from?" Kass pondered aloud, setting dinner on the table. Urbosa paled as she took a bit of roasted wing.
"Uh... Well, when two Hylians love each other very much, they..."
"Ugh, no!" Kass quickly cut Urbosa off. He sat across from her. "I know how she was made. How did you acquire her?"
"Legally." Urbosa passed Revali the carrots as he took his seat next to her.
"I- I would hope so! But who's child is she?"
"Ours by means of legal, non-biological methods." Revali chirped, taking a bite from a drumstick. Kass sighed in defeat.
"Hmph, Nevermind." That was the end of that. The rest of their meal was enjoyed in silence, save the soft hiss of the still-going fire pit.
Liz squeaked out a yawn. She couldn't be bothered to try and figure out what was going on. She was a baby; babies are notoriously bad at reading the room. Or reading in general. Urbosa had fed her on the way there, so Liz paid the grown-up food no mind. Well, almost; the soft carrot slice Revali had accidentally dropped on her leg was pretty tasty. Once the grown-ups finished their meal, the bright colored birdie said goodbye and left. Now the odd little group was seated outside in the backyard watching the stars, Revali strumming lazily on the lute, Urbosa rocking Liz and humming along. The baby yawned again. Today had been a strange day, but maybe that was just how things went. Liz didn't know. She was too young to care. All she knew was that she was safe with her mama and papa.
Oh how she'd long for those simpler days later...