before you read this chapter, remember the genre for this story is drama/hurt/comfort. now with that being said, happy reading babes!
2 years later…
Fitz was comfortably sleeping in bed when the alarm on his iPhone shook him awake. He felt like he just laid down 5 minutes ago. Grabbing his cell phone from the nightstand, Fitz silenced the alarm and tossed it back onto the nightstand. He forcibly pulled himself from the bed and stretched his long limbs. After showering and getting dress for work, Fitz walked back into the bedroom and stopped at his wife's side of the bed. She was lying on her side buried under the comforter. Stiff as a board, Fitz kept checking on her throughout the night to make sure she was still breathing, something he's been doing unfortunately for the past three months. Which is also one of the reasons he is sleep deprived.
"Liv can you try to get out of bed today?" Fitz asked with desperation laced in his tone. The only times she gets out of bed is to use the bathroom, to eat which is rare because her appetite is non-existent, and when Raleigh forces her out of bed. Three months ago they both took a major loss that rocked their worlds. Fitz has made amends with their loss, and he is trying to be patient with Olivia who refuse to accept it. She has shut down like she always does in a crisis.
No response. No movement.
"I love you. I am heading to work, I'll see you when I come home." Fitz pitifully looked down at his wife and left their bedroom. He miss waking up to her in his arms. He miss their morning affirmations they would say to each other before starting their day. Most importantly he miss their morning sex that could make even the gloomiest day still shine.
There was no time to make breakfast, so Fitz grabbed a bagel and left out the door. While waiting for his car to warm up, he called Raleigh. She is the only one out of their friend group that Olivia allows to come and sit with her while Fitz is at work. Yeah, it's gotten to the point where she needs a babysitter when Fitz is at work. In the past three months, she has proven herself to be unstable. Fitz had no choice but to put his wife on suicide watch, especially after the second hospital visit. He's not getting his wife committed. He's her husband it's his job to protect her not some facility.
"Hey Fitz, I'll be over in about thirty minutes. Did you leave?" Raleigh was wide awake unlike Fitz who needed at least another hour of shut eye. Right now he was no good or use to anyone or anything.
"I'm pulling out now, thanks again Raleigh." He hadn't meant for it to come off so dry. His tone should've been more appreciative because he truly is grateful for Raleigh. She has taken time off from running her hair salon to babysit Olivia for the past three months. Without Raleigh, Olivia probably would've been committed to a psychiatric facility.
"No problem we gotta get our girl back and we will. Fitz she will come out of this." Raleigh optimistically replied. She's been the beacon of light through it all. She has faith in Olivia that has long left Fitz's heart.
"Yeah I hope so." Fitz didn't share the same hopefulness anymore. It's been 3 months and there has been little to no progression on Olivia's end. She has to want to come out of this herself, Fitz can't do it for her.
"I know she will. Have a good day at work."
"Thanks call me if you need me."
"Okay."
Fitz ended the call and pulled out of the driveway heading to work. After graduating college, Fitz was lucky enough to land a job with a chemical plant in New Jersey. Though the pay is great for an entry level position, he cannot afford to stay at home and nurse Olivia's mental health back to its normal state. He has a mortgage and bills to maintain. Olivia isn't currently working, which makes Fitz the primary breadwinner.
"Wow you look exhausted." Fitz's supervisor Nicole commented as they passed each other in the hall. Fitz was heading to one of the labs to meet with his team.
"You have no idea." Fitz wished he would've stopped at Starbucks. He was too distracted and rode right past it. As of lately Olivia's wellbeing has been on his mind and everything else has been secondary including getting adequate sleep at night.
"Here you could use this more than me. Are you headed to the lab I'll walk with you." Nicole handed Fitz a cup of coffee that he graciously accepted.
"You are a lifesaver Mrs. Stevens." Fitz relished in the smell of his newfound addiction. He never thought he'd pick up a coffee habit, but it has been getting him through the long days he's been having lately.
"Please call me Nicole, you make me feel so old when you say Mrs. Stevens. Oh and don't forget the company's family barbeque is this weekend." Nicole reminded Fitz.
"Uh I don't know if we can make it Nicole. My wife hasn't been feeling well." Although he wasn't lying, he did have the perfect excuse. Fitz doesn't want to come to the barbeque. He doesn't have any friends here and he isn't looking to many any. Plus he's the youngest guys here, how much fun will this barbeque actually be with a bunch of old outdated nerds.
"That sucks I hope she gets better. Well you and your daughter should still come. Trust me she's gonna have a ball we have a ton of activities for the kids this year." Nicole was laying it on thick, too bad it was going in one ear and out of the other.
"I'll see Nicole." Fitz lied. He felt bad for lying. Nicole is probably his only friend her and she's a damn good supervisor.
"Okay I'll let you get to work." Nicole smiled as they reached the lab.
"Thanks again Nicole." Fitz walked into the lab. Nicole nodded and walked off.
He ignored the stares from his colleagues and got straight to work. One of his colleagues Ivan tried to make small talk, but Fitz wasn't in the mood to talk about fucking science podcasts that he never voluntarily listens to.
The rest of the day dragged on. Fitz despises his team of guys he works with. For them to have years of experience on him, they are embarrassingly struggling with the development of a new soap they've been working on that is going to help curb eczema flareups. Fitz and his team are stumped on trying to figure out the perfect balance of chemicals that won't be too harsh for the skin. To make matters worse, the egotistical bastards don't want to take direction from Fitz because they feel he's too young and inexperienced, yet he has made the most progress. All they do is argue back and forth with one another, while Fitz focus his energy on perfecting their craft.
Fitz rushed to clock out at the end of the day. Back in his car, he drove to the closest bar near his job. He was starving and in need of a stiff drink or three. The bar was fairly empty when Fitz walked in.
"Hey man, what can I get you?" The bartender asked Fitz.
"A double shot of honey Jack on the rocks and keep them coming. I also need an order of crab fries and 10 hot wings." Fitz went into his pocket, pulled out his wallet, and handed the bartender his card.
"Alright I'll go put your order in and have your drink in a minute." The bartender left Fitz and disappeared in the back where the kitchen was.
While he waited for his drink, his cell phone vibrated in his pocket. He prayed it wasn't Raleigh calling about Olivia as he pulled it out of his pocket. He just needed an hour of downtime before he had to deal with Olivia. Fitz exhaled a sigh of relief at seeing that it was Marcus calling instead.
"Hey bro what's up." Fitz greeted.
"I am about 10 minutes from your house, are you home?" Marcus work in Jersey but still resides in Philly. Fitz and Olivia are the only ones in their friend group that has moved out of state.
"No I am at bar not far from my job."
The bartender returned and made Fitz's double shot of honey Jack. He slid it in front of Fitz and went to wait on another patron.
"Give me the address and I'll meet you there."
Fitz told Marcus the address and ended the call. Marcus arrived about 20 minutes later. Fitz had already finished his food and was focused on getting drunk now. After Marcus placed his food and drink order, Fitz turned to his best friend to vent.
"I don't know if I can do this Marcus." Fitz confessed through pursed lips as the fourth double shot burned the back of his throat as it slid down.
"Fitz you and Olivia are going through a rough patch right now, that's what comes with marriage bro." Marcus simply replied with a shrug.
"Marcus she isn't putting any effort to move on. She has to move on. It's been three months. She is slowly killing herself and I cannot stand by and watch. I feel like a pussy because I cannot help her out of this. It's like I am living with a stranger. I don't know that woman anymore, she is not my wife. What's the point in even trying anymore?"
"Fitz she is your wife and you cannot give up on her. I won't let you give up on her because that will make you a pussy. If you think this is killing her, if you walk away from her, then you will kill her. Look at all she's been through in the past four years. The loss of her dad, then her grandma, and now her mom is sick. Then there was the stress ya'll went through with the whole adoption process with Brie. Liv was bound to have a breakdown and now that it's happened as her husband you have to pull her out of that."
"What the fuck do you think I am doing? I am trying my hardest but she has completely shut down. She doesn't communicate with me. She won't let me touch her. What am I supposed to do?" Fitz dropped his head feeling trounced.
"Don't give up bro. Look I'm not married and I can't tell you what to do. But all I can say is fight. She can't fight for herself, so you fight for her. Marcus held up his glass leaning it towards Fitz for a toast.
"I hear you man." Fitz dejectedly retorted as he clinked his glass with Marcus's glass.
They remained at the bar until they reached the capacity where it was still safe to drive. Fitz still wasn't ready to go home. He would've went to a hotel if Marcus wasn't tailing behind him. Part of him feel guilty and part of him feel justified in his feelings. He heard everything Marcus said back at the bar. Fitz has no problem fighting for Olivia, he has no problem being her backbone, shoulder, therapist, or whatever else she needs to bounce back. All he asks is for some effort on her part. She has to let him in and not shut him out the way she has these past 3 months.
He's her husband. He's supposed to be her confidant, her most trusted partner, as they are now one in the eyes of God. When she laughs, he laughs. When she hurts, he hurts. He took their vows very serious. He promised Olivia for better or worse. But goddammit for worse was kicking their ass right now. Remembering what his father said about the first 5 years of marriage, they're only on year 2 and Fitz is already dreading the next three years.
Lost in his thoughts, he didn't even realize when he pulled into his driveway or when Marcus stopped tailing him. Noticing that the living room light was on, Fitz shut off his car and hopped out. He was buzzed which caused him to stumble a bit into the house. Seeing Olivia and Raleigh on the couch didn't surprise Fitz being as though Raleigh is the only one that can get Olivia out of the bed it seems. Olivia's head was resting in Raleigh's lap, while Raleigh stroked her hair like she was a child. Olivia's eyes were empty. She has become a shell of her former self and that shit crushed Fitz.
"Hey Fitz, how was work?" Raleigh asked looking away from the TV. Olivia should be asking him how his day was. She is his wife, not Raleigh.
"Work was work, did she eat?" Fitz asked Raleigh with his eyes on Olivia. It's not like she was going to tell him if she ate or not.
"Yeah she ate." Raleigh confirmed.
"I'm going to shower." Fitz left Raleigh and Olivia and went upstairs. The cold shower was exactly what he needed. It sobered him up and refocused him.
When he returned to the living room, Raleigh was putting her shoes and coat on. Olivia was laying on the couch still watching TV oblivious to everything around her.
"Bye Liv, I love you." Raleigh kissed Olivia's cheek.
No response.
"Thanks again Raleigh." Fitz said as he walked her to the door.
"Stop thanking me Fitz, we are family. Be patient I know it's rough. She'll come around." Raleigh hugged him and walked to her car.
Fitz waited until she pulled off before closing the door. He was tempted to go straight upstairs and leave Olivia to her lonesome, instead he joined her in the living room. Marcus's words were ringing in his head on repeat. Don't give up on her…fight for her…if you walk away you will kill her…
"I can't keep living like this Olivia." Fitz declared as he glanced over at her.
No response
This only infuriated Fitz. He's throwing her a life jacket and she's refusing to be rescued. Don't give up on her…fight for her…if you walk away you will kill her…
"Should we just divorce? I mean did you even wanna marry me? Or did you only marry me to have a better chance at adopting Brie? Is this marriage a sham?" He was being petty and hitting below the belt now. If that's what it's going to take to garner some type of response from her, then he'd apologize later.
No response
Fitz closed his eyes and tried counting to ten. Sadly, he only made it to 4, Olivia is testing his patience and sanity right now. Don't give up on her…fight for her…if you walk away you will kill her…
"The more you shut down. The more you don't talk to me. You're only gonna push me further and further away from you and this marriage."
No response
That's it, he's done he can't do it anymore. She win. She fucking win. It's always Olivia's way or no way at all. It's clear that she has no plan on meeting him halfway to fix this, even if that means saving their marriage, she doesn't care.
"You know what fuck it. I don't even know why the fuck I came home tonight. I don't know why I come home any night. It's clear this marriage isn't something you want. It was only a convenience for you. I am drained and I cannot keep stressing and beating myself up trying to pull you out of this depressive state that you're in. I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe I should've had you committed. I thought I could do this, but you don't even want to help yourself. So you sit here and wallow like you've been doing for the past 3 months. I am done. When my wife returns, then we can talk if it's not too late." He's done doing things on her time her way.
Fitz stood up from the couch and went back upstairs leaving Olivia on the couch where he hoped she stayed. He'd rather sleep alone than to sleep next to a stranger.
now babes i know ya'll probably have a ton of questions, which is why i always say leave your thoughts. i read them all and they help give me the motivation to continue.
so our faves are 2 years into their marriage and things are rough. they are dealing with a loss, can you guess what that loss is? how is fitz so far as a husband?