ummm. so it's been about five years since I've updated this fic and I was recently going through reminiscing and decided to finish this. I don't even know if anyone will read this but it felt nice to have some closure. The writing might seem different as it's been five years and I have a nephew now so I know how actual children act. Anyways, that was a lot. Enjoy reading if you are :)

Trying to wrangle a two year into a puffy winter jacket was somehow harder than Katniss imagined. At two years old, Sorrel was an energized toddler who did not like to sit still for more than three seconds, even if Katniss begged.

"Your father is going to be here any minute, can you please put your jacket on," Katniss grumbled as Sorrel giggled and ran toward the kitchen. The last thing she needed was for Peeta to think she couldn't handle her own child. Which she was sure he wouldn't think that, but her nerves were frazzled nonetheless. Maybe it had nothing to do with that, truly, and it had more to do with the fact that Katniss was going to see Peeta again after avoiding him for days. Nearly two months had passed since he'd been home and tried to get Katniss to befriend his nurse girlfriend. Even letting him come over to have dinner and see Sorrel was beginning to ache and she had started to make excuses as to why she would be busy that night, the next night, the night after.

But she wasn't allowed to leave the district yet, and Katniss' mother had already arranged a ticket for Sorrel and Peeta to go meet her. She was running out of excuses and time and now today Peeta would be picking their daughter up and taking her to District Four for a whole week.

"If you don't put your jacket on then Bunny can't go with you," Katniss tempted, her knees beginning to ache from kneeling on the hardwood floor in her entry hallway.

Sorrel froze in her tracks and turned around to stare at her mom. The idea of not being able to take her stuffed bunny on her trip must have been a good enough threat. She came back toward her and willingly let Katniss slip her jacket onto her. Just as she pulled the zipper up to her chin, there was a knock at the front door.

"Daddy!"

Sorrel took off toward the front door and unlocked it (yes, she had learned how to unlock doors now which did nothing to quell Katniss' fears of her simply unlocking the door one day and disappearing forever).

"Hold on," Katniss said, moving to grab the bag she had packed and overpacked for Sorrel's stay with her grandmother. The list she had written and rewritten was on her kitchen table in the next room but she had already memorized it and thought about checking over the bag once more. Katniss had never wanted kids, but she never realized how much she would worry over the one she had now. It made her resent her mother even more than she already did. Did she not feel this way seeing Katniss and Prim barely surviving after their father's death, when she never so much as blinked in their direction? Katniss would simply die before she saw her own daughter suffer through anything at all and didn't understand how her mother simply abandoned them for a while.

Katniss shook herself out of her thoughts and called for Sorrel to wait again, but she wasn't listening, too excited to see Peeta, and pulled the door open as Katniss was now crouching on the floor like a cat, Sorrel's bag by her feet.

Peeta stood at the door, a smile on his face and his arm wrapped around a girl. Her hair was as white as the snow outside and she had a heart shaped face with dark green eyes. Her eyes dropped to Katniss, still on the floor, and her smile twitched.

It felt like someone kicked Katniss square in her chest and she had to lean forward a little to keep from falling back onto her butt. He brought his girlfriend unannounced to pick up his daughter to take her to the train station and ride with her to District Four.

It felt like time had frozen as Katniss took in Emerald's long baby pink dress, looking like a princess. And then she glanced at her own outfit, worn sweatpants and one of Peeta's old shirts she wasn't supposed to still have. It had faded to the point where the words were barely discernible, something about high school wrestling, and Katniss had put it on and slept in bitterly, knowing he'd be there in the morning. Like she was trying to make a point.

Heat rushed up her neck and she quickly stood and then stooped to grab the bag, trying to avoid eye contact. She could hear Sorrel's giggle as Peeta lifted her into the air before holding her in his arms.

Katniss turned back around and handed Peeta the bag, not even trying to force a fake smile. She felt extremely embarrassed and caught off guard and that made her angry. He had done it on purpose, she was sure. For a moment, she thought that maybe the Capital really did change him. She couldn't imagine the Peeta she had in the arena doing something like this to her. Katniss had to physically restrain herself from smacking her own forehead. Idiot, she thought. He wasn't hers to begin with how many times did she have to tell herself that? He didn't owe her anything just like she didn't owe him anything, especially not meeting his new perfectly pretty girlfriend.

It didn't mean she couldn't be surprised, however, that he tried to spring this girl onto her without asking, without informing her she would be at Katniss' house wearing a pretty dress with a sweet smile and Katniss had just rolled out of bed, too preoccupied with feeding Sorrel breakfast to properly dress herself or even look in a mirror.

Without a word she held her hands out to Sorrel so she could climb into her arms and she could kiss her goodbye. She told her she loved her and promised to call every single night and morning. An ache began to grow in her chest as she peppered her daughter's face with kisses. They had never spent more than a day apart and now she would be gone for a week. It took everything in Katniss to not slam the door in their faces and retreat to her bedroom with her baby in her arms.

She thought about it a moment longer before returning Sorrel into Peeta's arms. She didn't acknowledge Emerald, instead turning to meet Peeta's eyes for the first time. She finally smiled but she didn't let it meet her eyes. She wanted to show him she was angry and upset with him.

Thinking about what Haymitch had said, that Peeta still loved her almost made her laugh. He was wrong. She had known that when he first told her; Peeta had moved on and it was okay. Except that it wasn't-not to her. Not that it mattered. He looked happy from what she could tell. From little glances out of her window as he walked with Emerald to the market or to the bakery that was being rebuilt.

Peeta didn't smile back but he blinked in surprise and then suddenly looked ashamed.

Good, Katniss thought. And then she closed the door.

—

She kept her promise and called Sorrel every morning and night. Sorrel was still learning how to speak but she could at least string three words together and maybe Katniss cried every time she said I love you.

Her mother told her Peeta and Emerald were staying in District Four as a little vacation and Katniss snorted. Good for them. Good for her. She could freely leave her home without being scared of accidentally bumping into Peeta at the market or on a walk in the woods. It still wasn't worth not having her daughter there but she was trying to find good in the little things.

The week passed agonizingly slow but also too fast. She wished Peeta would just stay in District Four forever and maybe Katniss would be able to move on in peace. She knew she was being irrational, it wasn't fair to Peeta, but she didn't care right now. Katniss was hurting and she wanted to run away from everything. How tempting it would be to just pack up her things and leave. But again, it wouldn't be fair to Peeta or Sorrel because Katniss would be taking away their relationship.

On the seventh day, she finally released all her anger, simply exhausted. She could stand to be a little annoyed at Peeta for the surprise guest but the anger that was boiling in her stomach was too much for her to handle anymore. She was tired of emotions and feeling and decided maybe she was being dramatic. Katniss was thinking of running away and it made her realize she had to take a step back and rethink everything.

She pushed down her jumbled thoughts and rolled out of bed at the break of dawn. She had trouble sleeping the night before as the house had felt achingly lonely and she almost wanted to go see what Haymitch was up to. If that wasn't a cry for help, she didn't know what was.

The warmth from sharing a bed with someone else was something Katniss missed, something she thought about nearly every night. The nightmares still came, some nights worse than most, and Katniss wanted nothing more than to have someone to press her nose against, to wrap around and feel their heartbeat and the rise and fall of their chest under her cheek. Instead she was met with cold, damp sheets and the ghost of her own nightmares. She didn't care who was in her bed, she'd even take Johanna Mason over nothing at all. But every night she crawled into bed by herself and woke up even lonelier than the night before, like she was an hourglass with time slowly slipping away, empty.

But today Sorrel was coming home and that erased everything else in Katniss' head. She felt excitement low in her belly like she hadn't felt in years and began to go around the house, tossing things around to make it look like she cleaned some. She made tea and read some random book on a shelf in the living room and sat on the couch with her arm thrown over her eyes, trying to fight down the happiness she felt. All her life she had felt guilty for feeling anything near happiness and it was a hard habit to fight now that everything was over. She pulled herself from the couch and allowed herself to feel her emotions, smiling and pacing the floor.

Then she remembered who was bringing Sorrel and her bare feet stuttered on the carpet.

Peeta.

In the seven days he had been gone, Katniss had fought through every last emotion about him. Sadness, anger, jealousy, happiness. It was like she was grieving a relationship she had never had. Standing there in her living room she decided she was done. Katniss was no longer the sixteen year old Peeta had left. She was older and had fought in a war. She wouldn't let silly feelings make her feel less in her own district, her home. She didn't want to hide anymore or duck away from her window when Peeta walked by his, or lock herself away in her house simply because she loved him.

Yes. Katniss loved him. And it was okay to be scared to admit it, but she hadn't been living freely her entire life, always under someone's eye whether it was Gale's, Haymitch's, the President.

And now Peeta's, even though she hadn't realized it.

As Katniss stood in her living room, her arms wrapped around herself, frowning at the wall, there was a knock on her front door. She blinked away her thoughts, the words she would say to Peeta when she saw him, and took off, skirting around the couch to yank open her front door.

Sorrel flew into Katniss' arms and she was crying before she even realized it. She hugged her tightly to her chest and pressed kisses against her cheeks, accidentally rubbing her tears onto her.

Katniss used both of her hands to wipe her tears away and ushered Sorrel into the living room where some of her toys were still on the floor. Obviously Katniss had ran out of energy when she was "cleaning" earlier.

Peeta was still at the door, Sorrel's bag in his hands, and Katniss took the bag from him, dropping it further down the hallway to get it out of the way.

"Can I talk to you?" she asked, trying her best to sound stable and sure. Peeta raised his eyebrows and stepped into the hallway, closing the door behind him to keep the cold air from seeping into her house more than it already had. He shook the snow from his hair and his nose and cheeks were pink from the cold. He looked devastatingly cute.

Katniss let herself think that without guilt and bit down a smile. She reminded herself she was going to be honest and brave and had to tell herself if she executed a President she could handle talking to Peeta, even if it was one last time.

"Me first," he blurted, effectively cutting off Katniss' pep talk she had prepared for herself. "I want to apologize. For bringing Emerald over without telling or asking you. It was rude of me and I didn't realize how much it would upset you until I saw you."

Katniss blinked in surprise. "Oh. It's okay. I was really upset at first, honestly, but I feel better now. There's something I want to tell you."

Peeta shoved his hands into his jacket pockets and looked at her curiously. She took a moment to memorize his face right then. His blue eyes looking dark in her dimly lit hall, the now melted snow collected in his golden hair and his pretty complexion.

"I love you," she sighed and terror and relief washed over her at the same moment. It was like she had opened up a bottle in her chest and everything was spewing out. "I've been in love with you for a couple of years, Peeta, I was just too scared to say it."

He didn't say anything, just stared at her, his lips parted and his eyebrows raised. So she pushed on.

"I'm sorry. I should've told you this a long time ago, but with everything going on I never had the chance. I couldn't afford to let myself love someone else who would get taken from me, used against me in some way to keep me in line or to prove a point." She sucked in a breath, honestly amazed at herself. "But that's all over now. I'm in love with you. You don't have to say anything back to me, I know how you feel. It's okay. I just...I wanted you to know."

She dropped her eyes to his boots, her confidence extinguished just as quickly as it came. She suddenly wanted to disappear but held her ground, proud of herself. Katniss finally said it; the words she had been dreading for years and years. And no one was going to take him away from her unless it was himself and she was okay with that, would understand it. But no one would take him back to the Capital to keep a close eye on him, or send him into the games, or take their child away. It was safe, and she had said what she meant to.

"Katniss," Peeta started in a tone that almost sounded like he was speaking to a lost puppy. She knew what was coming next and forced herself to look at him.

"Don't worry about it, Peeta. I just wanted you to know. That's all."

"I…" He ran a hand down his face, suddenly looking exhausted. Sorrel was calling her from the other room, wondering why she was still in the hall, and Katniss took a full step back, painfully. It felt like a scissor cut a string between the two of them and Peeta shook his head like he was clearing his thoughts.

"I'll see you next weekend?" she asked, bringing up the time he usually picked up Sorrel to spend the day with him and he said nothing else, just stood in the hall as she walked away.

—

Katniss didn't see Peeta again until the following weekend. She hadn't allowed herself to peak out of her window to see what he was up to, allowing him to have his privacy like she should have since the beginning. Instead she focused on her daughter, teaching her how to say how old she was in case someone asked. Katniss didn't know why she was so set on something that small but it seemed important to her. She wanted people to know how old her daughter was.

Friday rolled around and left just as quickly, bringing with it a new blanket of fresh snow. Katniss stared at her front yard through a window, debating on trying to wrangle Sorrel into a jacket so they could play in the snow when someone knocked on her door.

She pulled herself down the stairs, trying to be as quiet as she could since Sorrel was now refusing naps and it took Katniss a good hour to finally get her to sleep that afternoon. Her socked feet barely made a sound as she carefully walked to her front door and pulled it open.

Peeta stood on her front porch, his breath fogging in the frigid air. He looked surprised to see her, like he expected someone else to open the door to her house.

"Hi," she said stupidly because she almost thought he wouldn't come today.

"Hi," he replied back and stepped inside without being invited. He crowded up against her and Katniss stepped back in surprise. His eyes were wide; he had expected her to step back and allow him to come in but she was still processing that he was there

"Sorry!" Peeta said as he caught her shoulders to keep her from stumbling back.

"Shh!" she hissed instinctively, reaching behind him to close the door. "I finally got Sorrel to nap."

She realized their proximity just as he did and she stepped back twice for good measure. Peeta glanced around the hall like he was trying to find something to focus on and Katniss was aware of how different he was acting compared to last time.

"Finally, huh?" he asked, not looking at her. He had never acted shy before and Katniss turned away and walked into the living room just to have something to do. He followed her.

"I need to talk to you," he said.

Katniss froze and her brain immediately told her Peeta and Emerald were getting married. She had to hold back laughter at herself.

Instead she turned on her heels to face him, her eyebrows raised in question.

"I want to show you something first. Come here," Peeta continued, stepping toward her stairs and motioning her to follow. He wanted to talk to her...upstairs? She didn't know what was up there that she wouldn't know about.

She followed him up the stairs anyways and to the left to Sorrel's room, where the door was cracked so Katniss could peek in occasionally and make sure she was sleeping soundly.

Peeta pushed open the door quietly and stepped back to let Katniss hang in the doorway. She searched the room for any clues as to what would cause Peeta to bring her up here but she continually came back empty handed. Not wanting to risk waking Sorrel, Katniss reached forward to touch the door handle and bring the door to a crack again, but suddenly there were arms around her, tugging her backwards into a chest.

"Peeta," she hissed, more worried about making noise before she realized he was hugging her from behind. Heat rushed to her cheeks and she struggled against him for a moment, confused. Her fingers managed to grasp the door handle and bring the door almost fully shut before Peeta reached out and kept the door from closing all the way.

"What are you doing?" Katniss asked breathlessly. Even though Peeta was still wearing his thick jacket she swore she could feel his heartbeat through his clothes. He pressed his face into her neck, his nose still cold from outside, and Katniss' stomach flipped.

This hug seemed a little more than friendly to her. Her own heartbeat thumped to meet his, keeping time.

"I want to be a family," he murmured into her skin, the words sending a shiver down her spine.

"What?" she asked stupidly.

"I want to be a family," he repeated. "With you and Sorrel."

Her hands pushed against his arms and he loosened his grip enough that she could spin around. He pulled his face away and stared at her, all serious.

"I want to be with you."

And then he caught her face in his hands and kissed her. Katniss couldn't even remember the last time they hugged, let alone kissed. It had to have been before he left for the Capital, right before her first year as a mentor. Over two years since she had kissed him, and none of them could ever compare to this one.

She kissed him back, pouring her emotions into her kiss, hoping he could feel them. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she tugged him closer, deepening the kiss easily. Warmth spread from her chest slowly until it engulfed her, radiating and thrumming through her bloodstream.

Peeta had his arms around her waist now and she accidentally leaned back into his touch and her back bumped into Sorrel's bedroom door, opening it wider.

They both pulled away and Katniss snatched the door before it could crash into the wall behind it. She closed it fully, quietly, and stared up into Peeta's eyes.

His lips were red from their kiss and he was grinning.

"What about Emerald?" Katniss blurted.

His smile fell and he reached up to scratch the back of his neck, his ears turning pink. Katniss wanted to kiss him again just for looking like that but she resisted, leaning against the door.

"I...uh, I broke up with her last weekend. She moved back home," he said sheepishly.

"Peeta," Katniss said. "You gave her a week?"

"Actually, I told her I was in love with you and she immediately left, understandably so. I didn't give her a time limit," he argued.

Katniss wrapped her arms around his neck again and pulled him down to kiss him. She pulled him into her until he had to press a hand to the door frame to keep from putting both of their weight on the door. She thought of when she would sneak into his room and he would kiss her when she cried or when her nightmares were too hard to handle. He had always been there for her. It was always Peeta. It had been since his name was pulled at the Reaping.

"I love you," she said, pulling away to press kisses all over his face like she sometimes did you Sorrel.

"I love you, Katniss. I always have."

Katniss paused, her lips trailing down his jaw and pulled away.

"Even in Thirteen?" she asked selfishly, running her finger across the collar of his jacket, sure he must be hot in it.

"Yes. I was lying. I was upset and I wanted to hurt you, I guess. I'm sorry."

She kissed him again, swallowing his apologies, and unzipped his jacket for him, pushing it off his shoulders so he could breathe a little easier.

Peeta loved her and she loved him and they had a baby and they could be happy.

The war was over, their town was being rebuilt and they were in love.

This was a future sixteen year old Katniss could never have imagined.

—

Katniss struggled to unzip her heavy wedding dress, fighting the own length of her arms to try and find the damn zipper. She wanted the pins out of her hair and her dress off and her husband immediately in her arms.

"Here," Peeta said, emerging from the bathroom now fully out of his suit. He easily unzipped her dress and she stepped out quickly, catching Peeta's hand for balance as she stepped out of the white ring of cloth.

She still had the taste of toast in her mouth as she rummaged through her dresser to find something more comfortable to sleep in.

Peeta stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing a kiss to her bare shoulder.

"My beautiful wife," he said with a smile. Katniss could feel herself blushing, even after a year of officially dating him he still managed to make her turn red.

"Yeah, you just wanted some toast," she argued as she pulled on pajamas. She turned, though, and kissed him, only pulling away when she couldn't contain her own smile.

"Come join me, my wife," Peeta continued, sweeping his arm toward their bed grandly.

"You're embarrassing me," Katniss grumbled but she climbed into bed and willingly tugged Peeta on top of her, his laughter making her heart beat faster.

"I think we should have another baby," he said between kisses and Katniss knew he was just trying to annoy her. On their wedding night of all nights.

"Maybe when Sorrel is twenty."

"We'll only be 38 by then. I think that's fair."

"Shut up."

She sat up on her elbows and kissed him again, successfully ending his next retort.

Their future was solid, no war in sight, their daughter asleep across the hall, and Katniss' new wedding ring shiny on her finger. Maybe she would consider another baby.