"Am I screaming to an empty sky?

Empty sky, no way, that's me cause one half of my heart is free

Empty sky, no way, that's me, cause the other half of my heart's asleep"

twenty one pilots, Anathema

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Chapter 11: Colder Inside Your Head

The warm joy and feeling of good luck didn't last wasn't long-lasting, nearly as much as Percy had hoped for.

Perhaps it had been unfair to ask that of the universe, considering they were all sick kids, and perhaps it wasn't smart of himself to let himself be happy. But he couldn't help but hang on to the blissfulness and hopefulness.

Now he was regretting falling to that false sense of safety.

As the days grew even colder, the skies turned white, as the snow began falling in Long Island. The warmth inside his chest started to die down as winter drew nearer and December was just around the corner.

It was terrifying, the speed at which time went by, and the weight Percy had learned to take off his shoulders came back all at once as he realized almost three months had flown by, and his counted days became less and less. He couldn't tell if the pressure on his chest was purely made up of anxiety or something worse, but he was too afraid to bring it up, and only hoped it was the former.

He knew his mood was darker around this time of the year. His mom said it was seasonal, but this time it seemed even farther down the hole. He felt more hopeless than usual.

The blade that remained hidden painfully haunted him, yelled for him to take the habit back up. His own head longed for the familiar sting. The only thing stopping him was the thought of his mother, the fear of breaking his promise to her.

Things only turned worse the afternoon Reyna couldn't make Annabeth get up from bed after she went to rest for a bit. Her skin was burning with fever, she could barely keep her eyes open, and she had somehow managed to keep it hidden from everyone for two days in the hopes that it wasn't another infection.

Percy himself had spent so much time with her and hadn't once realized she was sick again. Guilt ate at him despite Luke's attempts to keep him sane and stable. Still, as she lay in the sick bay, with an IV connected to her wrist giving her antibiotics and fluids, he could just think that he should have known she wasn't feeling good.

December came in a flurry of snow, and he didn't know how much time he would be able to handle the cold sting inside his chest. At this point, Luke's smiles were the only thing that warmed him up, and gave him enough energy to pretend not to be a sad mess.

And fuck his ankle still in that damned brace, still not healed and still making him feel more useless than before the sprain.

Those warm hands were the ones that prevented him from sleeping in a couple days into the month, a day a couple of shades darker than usual.

"Hey, Percy, psst, Percy," he whispered softly, "I'm leaving for therapy right now."

Now that got his attention immediately, as he turned around and sat up at once, staring into the blue eyes he'd grown so fond of and realized looked even bluer in the white of winter.

"What do you mean right now? I'm going with you, today's a day I go with you, isn't it?"

"Well yeah," he fidgeted with the sleeve of his jacket, "I'm sorry, but Dr. D said you shouldn't come with this weather, 'cause you can get bad in the cold, and that's definitely something we don't want happening."

"You don't want me to come?" he couldn't help the sadness in his voice, but he couldn't care less about it.

Luke sighed softly, "Of course I want you to come, you're the best company, but… I really don't want you to get sick, one of us is enough."

"I won't get sick, like my heart isn't affected by the cold, how will going with you make me feel bad?" Percy tried to feign ignorance, but he knew better than to expect Luke to fall for it. Instead, he rolled his eyes softly, and sat down on the bed, grabbing Percy's cold hands with his warm ones.

"C'mon Percy, you know I know if you get sick, especially from a cold or something like that that can develop into something worse, your blood pressure can lower, and good things can't follow from that."

Luke's eyes held so much fond worry, Percy's heart clenched. He didn't say anything, just exhaled deeply, but Luke understood his silence was worth more than words. The blond boy just smiled at him and got up, kissing one of his hands as he did. An almost burning warmth blossomed, and he just stared at the other with wide eyes.

"I'll be right back, don't worry, but don't go back to bed, go downstairs, would you?"

Percy didn't get a chance to reply before he left, still dumbfounded and burning from the touch of Luke's lips. He felt way too many things at once, and all that left him feeling floaty, like his mind couldn't choose a feeling to settle on. Idly, he wondered if that's what being high felt like.

He kissed my hand.

A laugh came out as a huff, as he smiled softly.

Was this warmth enough to melt down the cold inside?

… no, but can it be?

He stood up on wobbly legs. He blamed the sprained ankle, but once he was out of the comfort of his bed, the world seemed bleeker and much chiller than what it had been the day before. Bitterly, he reached for the crutches, even though he was more than capable to walk, keeping more weight than necessary off his foot would quicken the speed in which it healed. Being uncomfortable using the stupid crutches would pay off when his ankle got better.

He stood staring at the door for a couple of seconds, actually considering if it was worth it to go outside or it was better to just go back to bed and sleep some more. There was the other alternative to ease the numbness he was feeling, but that was out of question, so he grabbed his clothes out of his closet, ignoring the dreaded hoodie as best he could.

Someone was using the shower when he finally made himself walk towards the bathroom, which he found highkey annoying. He walked back to his room, leaving the door open to see when the person inside left, and to make sure anyone who came to shower knew he came first.

Finally, he heard the creak of the bathroom door, and stood up again, brace now wrapped in the waterproof protector.

Percy walked to find himself face to face with Nico, who honestly, could have looked a lot better. He had bags under his tired eyes, and he was shaking his head, as he crossed his arms over his chest in a way that seemed like he was holding himself not to fall apart. Worry sparked deep inside Percy's chest.

Please, not again.

"Hey, Nico," he whispered softly, and the younger boy looked up with a frown, "how are you feeling? You look a bit tired."

"Yeah, I- I didn't sleep well," he faltered, absentmindedly fidgeting with the sleeve of his sweatshirt, "but I'm fine though."

"Are you sure? You really don't look well."

"I'm fine Percy," he snapped and tried to glare at Percy, but there was no force behind the stare, and he found that more disconcerting.

"Alright, if you say so, hey is Jason still in your room?"

"I think so, he was still there when I left… I think."

"Cool, cool, I just wanted to ask him something."

Putting showering on hold, Percy walked with Nico to his and Jason's room, keeping a close eye on him. Nico didn't even bother knocking, he just opened the door and left him to it, making his way around the corner. Percy was tempted to follow, but thought it was better to talk with Jason first.

Luckily, Jason was already awake, as if anything else could be expected, and he had looked away from his phone to stare questioningly at Percy, sitting up on his bed.

"Hey bro, what's up?"

"Hey, I'm sorry, but have you noticed Nico acting weird today?"

Jason frowned, creasing his eyebrows together, "Nico? No, I barely saw him this morning. He got up really early, I figured he couldn't sleep, so I went outside and he was playing games on his phone laying down on one of the couches, but I didn't see him acting differently, neither when he came to get his stuff to go shower."

"Oh," Percy was taken aback, he was so sure there was something wrong with Nico, "I just saw him looking so tired, and honestly he looked so confused and anxious, I was afraid it was going to be like last time."

"Really?" Jason sat up straighter, his shoulders tensing a little, "Honestly, if you say he doesn't look good, I don't doubt you, and it's not like he would say if he was feeling bad."

"I know, it's not like him to ask for help, that's why I wanted to ask you if you can keep an eye on him while I shower, I'm not gonna take long."

"'course, I'm worried now too, it's not like his attacks give much sign anyway, and I know if something happens it'll be sudden, let me just brush my teeth."

"Yea, it's fine, thanks dude."

Jason brushed his teeth and left the bathroom looking for Nico. Percy was in no means less worried, but knowing that Jason was going to look after him and make sure he was okay, made him feel slightly better.

The warm water melted away some of the frost around him, and it made him feel safer somehow. Something about the water always made him feel like he was safe. It felt like he belonged there. But showers can only last for so long.

After getting dressed and putting on a long-sleeved shirt, he walked out of the bathroom to the sound of chaos coming from downstairs.

The feeling of safety went flying out the window before he could blink.

He rushed down the hallway and down the stairs as fast as he could while having a brace for a sprained ankle, and pain shot up his leg, but he didn't care at all.

Something was wrong, and he needed to know what.

Something was very fucking wrong.

Someone was on the floor, while the others stood in a loose circle in different states of anxiety. Percy didn't have eyes for them, only for the dark haired boy laying on his side, trembling slightly, eyes clamped shut, and the doctor kneeled next to him as he walked towards them.

The worst was over, but it still wasn't good news.

Percy could hear barely restrained sobs and demands to know how he was doing, what was wrong, why so little time between seizures. But his attention was still solely on the two persons.

"I can't tell you why the time between seizures was shorter this time Annabeth, we would have to make a full checkup on his brain, but I think it's worth looking into," Chiron looked around at them, "He's fine now, but I think we should call Apollo, and let Dr. D and Nico's father know what happened."

As Percy's eyes glanced around the circle, he caught sight of Hazel, the one who was trying to restrain her cries, with her arms around her torso, holding herself together just like Nico had just moments ago. Percy walked towards her, and opened his arms to her. She didn't hesitate in hugging him, and he didn't hesitate in holding her, an urge to keep her safe from the stress she was feeling.

She didn't sob, she didn't cry loudly. He could feel tears dampening his shirt, but Hazel wasn't taking refuge in the embrace, instead she was getting herself together. It wasn't exactly the best thing to do when she was obviously distressed, but he just held her as best he could with crutches, still watching Nico closely.

"Jason, would you carry him to the infirmary? Thank you. Annabeth, sit outside for a moment, the IV is movable anyway. That's it, my boy. I'm just gonna make the calls real quick and I'll go check up on his vitals."

Percy could see the pang of hurt in Jason's eyes, and he could understand it. Nico looked so small and pale, Percy didn't remember him looking like this the first time.

He shouldn't have left him alone. He knew something was wrong. He knew Nico didn't look okay. He wasn't okay. There must have been a way to prevent it. If only he'd been there, maybe he could have done something. Now Jason also felt guilty. He'd made Jason feel worse.

"¿Qué pasó?" he asked Reyna softly, purposely talking in Spanish so Hazel wouldn't get upset, "No se veía bien arriba, pensé que algo podría estar mal, pero esperaba que no fuera a pasar nada malo."

"No estoy del todo segura," she shook her head, and Percy noticed Annabeth watching them closely, "Estaba con Annie cuando escuche que Hazel gritó y Jason estaba hablando así todo preocupado, cuando salí ya estaba en el suelo."

"¿Fue muy malo?"

"No te sabría decir, Percy, I mean, no estaba la última vez para saber si fue mejor o peor, pero para mí no fue tostón, no lo vi muy bien."

"Hey Hazel, he's fine, he's gonna be alright," Piper walked towards the girl still wrapped in Percy's arms, at the same time as Jason closed the door softly behind him, sniffing softly, "you know he'll be good as new with a little time."

Hazel pushed Percy a little so he let go of her, and he did even though he wanted nothing more than comforting her at the moment.

"But this time it looked worse Pipes, you all saw how pale he looked after," she faltered, breathing sharply, "what if something's wrong this time? He suffered a pretty bad injury to his head when they got in that accident, that's why he has these seizures, what if something got worse?"

"You can't tell if this time was worse Hazel, I mean, only scans and tests can tell you that, for all we know he was feeling sick, and that added to the seizure's making him feel weaker than usual."

"I can feel like something's not right, I don't know how but I just do- I- I don't-"

"It's okay, breathe, Hazel, just take deep breaths."

It had taken a while, sitting down with Piper and Annabeth ushering soft words of comfort and a cup of tea for her to calm down and be hopeful that Nico would be fine. In the meantime, Chiron had already left his office, shortly telling them that both Dr. Apollo and Nico's dad were on their way, and Dr. D and Luke would be back as soon as possible. He'd disappeared in the medbay just after, and hadn't come out yet.

"It's a good thing dad got an apartment in Manhattan, 'cause otherwise it would take him a long time to come from Maine."

Percy saw the opportunity to distract Hazel, and he took it.

"You guys live in Maine?"

"Yeah, dad's a lawyer, and he used to travel a lot, we used to live in Cali, then Alaska, then back to Cali, and finally we moved to Maine. He retired to an easier life I guess, and he only works in this northeast area, so we've lived there for three years or so. But I mean, when Nico got sick, and he came here, we got an apartment in NYC, so it'd be easier to visit him and all. Then bam, I got sick too, and here I am too. He stayed in NYC for our sake."

"Wow, you've lived at many different places."

"Oh, I was born and lived in New Orleans with my mom too, before I moved in with my dad."

"I feel like that's a whole lot of personal story there, but I'm pretty sure it's not something you enjoy talking about, so I won't ask."

Hazel chuckled humorlessly, "Yeah, not really, maybe another day."

"That's fine, you don't have to, but still I feel like that's a record for most amount of places you've lived in."

It was a way to distract everyone, as each tried to 'beat' that record. It turns out none of them really 'beat' five places where they had lived at one point of their life, considering city and state anyway.

"So it sucks, I'm at 3, Pipes and Reyna are at 4, Leo?"

"Does it count that I lived in different foster homes for several years?"

"Not if that was in the same city, dude."

"Damn, I would have beat all of you easily, that leaves me at 4 too."

"I've only lived in 2 places? I really have lived in Cali all my life, and moved her to NYC a couple years ago."

"Well, bro, I've got it worse, I've lived here in New York all my life, being born somewhere else doesn't count."

"Actually, I'm pretty sure Nico beats us, 'cause he lived in Italy when he was a kid, moved to DC, I'm sure he lived in Vegas at some point, Cali with me and dad, then Maine, and finally here in New York, so technically he wins."

"Aw man!"

"What about Luke?"

"Pretty sure he lived in Connecticut, and then moved here, but I'm not a hundred percent certain."

"Nico wins then."

"He better beat this shit then, 'cause he has to know he wins against all of us."

The slightly better mood became somber in the millisecond that the words settled down, and Percy wondered if it felt as heavy for the others as it pressed down on his lungs. He couldn't let himself think too much if he wanted to avoid himself spiraling into the raging depression trying to catch up to him.

He couldn't help the sting he feels at the thought of Nico suffering, which happened to be happening at the moment, and even according to Hazel, who's been with him the most, this time it was worse than before.

It was an unspoken rule of sorts in his book. He doesn't really care if the others feel the same way, but he's almost certain they do. Even in the short time he's been here, Percy has a softer spot for the siblings, it must be that Nico and Hazel are the youngest of them all, but incredibly overwhelming protectiveness surge through his body whenever something happens to either of them, and while with Hazel it's only been once or twice, Nico worries him far more.

That and the fact that head trauma is among the most dangerous injuries.

Thick silence fell around him, as the numbness he'd been feeling too much lately returns. He could see the others speaking, moving their mouths as not a sound reached Percy's ears. That would have worried him under other circumstances, but he's blank, nothing. Nothingness feels nice when the other alternative is panic.

He sat in silence, slowly eating an orange someone passed him a while ago, nibbling slice after slice thoughtlessly. He didn't know how much time had gone by since Chiron came out of the infirmary and let them know that Nico was good for the moment, stable and just a little dazed, but he'd still keep watch over him. Hazel didn't have to say a word as she walked past him and most likely sat down with him and held his hand in the warm way only Hazel could. Chiron didn't have any objections, but he still frowned sadly, turning around and shutting the door close behind him.

He still had half the orange in his palm. Taking a look at it, he couldn't be sure that he held an orange. While he ate it, he didn't really pay attention to how it tasted, but it's definitely redder than a regular orange. He found the idea of coming up with possible things the not-orange could be, far more entertaining than thinking about anything else.

The color… the red… it made him long for the distraction he's known makes everything clearer...

But would it be worth it?

Probably, but let's not find out.

Grapefruit… hm no I remember those are bigger… blood orange? Honestly never had one of those…

He jumped as the front door slammed open, hitting the wall with enough force to rattle the pictures hanging from nails. He sat curled up in a bean bag as comfortably as possible in the corner, with 0 view of the door, but he didn't even try to see who came in so abruptly.

Tears well up in his eyes for some reason as Luke's concerned face comes into view, soon followed by a frantic Dr. D.

"Hey kids, how are you holding up?" Dr. D said with far more steadiness than his posture would imply.

"Eh, we're hanging in there, we're obviously worried, but we're just waiting y'know."

"Yeah, there's not much we can do either, but wait to see how he's doing after some time. I take it Hazel and Chiron are in there?"

"Yeah, Chiron said he's stable and all, but still… Hazel's in there, well, being Hazel."

Dr. D smiled, though it looked pained, "I bet she is, I'm gonna go see- Luke try and drink some water, I'll be right back."

Luke nodded to him, before walking to the kitchen. Percy fell back into the habit of taking in every detail. Even through his foggy head, he needed to make sure Luke was alright. He couldn't be sure about that for once; Luke seemed a little paler, the most minuscule strain in his face that indicated his discomfort. He kept on wishing he could catch Luke's eyes, but he didn't look his way, just headed straight to the kitchen.

Perhaps on another occasion, he would have followed him to make sure he was okay. He hadn't even said hi. But there was no way he would have found an ounce of strength to stand up at the moment, even if he wanted to.

(He wants to, he really wants to. But he can't. Why can't he just get up? What if he's not okay?)

Luckily, Luke has grown to know Percy as much as Percy has grown to know Luke.

He came out of the kitchen looking better, his skin had a little more color, and he wasn't carrying so much tension on his shoulders anymore.

"Hey guys, without having to lie to Dr. D, how are you really hanging out?" Luke asked softly, more a whisper than anything, gnawing on his lower lip.

"It sucks dude," Jason said softly, "it was really bad this time, I- I can't remember it ever being this bad."

"This is the worst part though, not being able to do anything to help, and we barely know how he's doing," Annabeth said, not bothering to lift her head from Reyna's shoulder, "it's just nerve-racking, and all we can do is wait for Apollo."

"How are you feeling by the way, Annie?" Luke sat on the arm of the couch where she was, frowning at the IV in her arm.

"Will you ever stop calling me that, Jesus, can't you get it that I don't like it?"

"Sorry, sorry, force of habit," he put his hands up in surrender, chuckling, before fixing her with a serious look "but for real, how are you?"

Percy hadn't really paid attention to Annabeth, despite the IV standing tall next to her, but now that he focused on her he noticed her flushed cheeks and the strain in her features. He may have forgotten, but Annabeth was still ill, and she should have been resting.

She shrugged, "Better, still a little achy and tired, but the antibiotics are doing their work just fine."

"Good, so-"

His focus was short-lived, fog clouding him again. He couldn't really concentrate on anything, it was all so much, it all became a single mush, heavy and uncomfortable, but thankfully easy to ignore.

Staring at his hands, he still had the orange (blood orange? grapefruit?) to finish. Even in his haze, he knew he would get hell if he didn't even manage to eat a simple fruit.

A small part of his mind told him he would get hell anyway because he was pretty sure he hadn't taken his meds, so why bother eating when Dr. D would get mad anyway?

Well, it would be worse if you didn't eat anything.

He tore another slice, and ate it in a single bite. It was better to just get it over with. Maybe eating would make it easier… even if he didn't know what 'it' was.

"Hey Perce," a voice startled him right next to him, soon followed by a hand on his arm. He couldn't help but jump a little, as goosebumps rose all over his skin and he drew a sharp breath. "Oh, sorry! I- I didn't mean to frighten you, I just- you don't look too good."

He blinked a few times, shaking his head and willing his entire body to just chill the fuck out. He turned to Luke, and gathering strength from every cell in his body, he smiled as best he could.

"What- what do you mean? I'm alright," he studied Luke's face, watching as his blue eyes scrunched up in concern, "I mean, obviously I'm worried as fuck, but- I'm as good as I can be right now."

He was aware of how soft and unsure his voice sounded, but he had to keep some sort of posture, a guise that he wasn't on the brink of a depressive episode after a long time of being fine, and pretend that that didn't scare him at all.

Could he blame it on the weather? Was it seasonal?

"Are you sure, Percy? I've seen you worried, but… I don't know, you seem withdrawn."

"I'm fine, I promise, but what about you? You looked a bit pale earlier, how did today go?"

"I know you're changing the subject-"

"C'mon I've been worried about how therapy has been going since day one."

"Fine," Luke sighed, dropping his hand from Percy's arm and rubbing at his own, "it's going as expected after almost two weeks, I mean, I just felt a little dizzy and nauseous, but I'm better now."

"Do you want to go rest upstairs? There's no problem if you do."

"No, no, it'll pass in a moment, but… are you sure you're alright?"

It was Percy's turn to sigh, "Yes Luke, I'm just worried for Nico and Annabeth and you, and I don't know, I can't help but zone out sometimes."

The lie was so well said that Percy had a hard time not believing himself. It was perfectly acceptable to be worried about your friends and zoning out a little. Luke seemed to agree, if the softening of his features and the drop of his shoulders meant anything.

Before he could say anything, the doorbell rang.

"It must be Dr. Apollo or Nico's dad," Jason said, getting up from his seat, only taking a few steps before Dr. D came out from the infirmary, motioning for Jason to sit back down and getting the door himself.

Percy's heart was back to beating faster than it should have, taking everything into consideration, given his interest. All the way from where he sat he was able to distinguish the optimistic voice of his main doctor.

"Ah, Dionysus, how's Nico doing?" Dr. Apollo said, making his way into the living room, not waiting for Dr. D's own reply. If Percy didn't know better, he would say Dr. Apollo's voice was its usual chill and bright, but he could tell when the doctor was tense, after all the years of being under his care. "Hades just texted me saying he's only a few minutes away, but I still wanna get right to Nico, he can meet us inside- hi guys, I hope you're all okay, that must have been tough to watch, but don't worry, Nico's going to be just fine, what with so many outstanding doctors caring for him."

"Come in, by the way, I've been meaning to ask what you think of something Mr. Dellamorte mentioned to me the other day-"

The door closed behind the pair, to which followed thick silence among them. Percy was absolutely done with the tense stillness, he felt itchy from it, he wanted to scratch at his arms until they were red, or something entirely different to take away the sensations under his skin. His promises were too close to being thrown out the window for comfort, only guilt stopped him. Well, guilt and Luke's hand appearing on his arm again.

"Hey, look at me," Luke said, and he raised his head to meet his eyes, "Nico's going to be okay, we're all gonna be okay."

Percy couldn't bring himself to argue. They didn't know anything about getting better and everything being okay, the future was uncertain. Either way, he nodded, not finding in himself the energy to give him an answer. He knew he didn't reflect even fake confidence in Luke's words, but to be fair he wasn't even trying, and the blond boy knew him well enough to get the state of his mind at that moment.

With no hesitation, Luke moved his bean bag so that they were exactly next to each other with no space between the beans, and they were so close Percy could bet Luke could hear his anxious heartbeat. He didn't say another word as they sat practically pressed to each other, he only opened his arms slightly, a sad smile on his face.

Percy wasn't even sure he was getting what Luke meant, but the opportunity was right there and then, and in the turmoil that he was, he needed - craved - the comfort that being close to Luke often brought. Before his anxiety got the best of him and he shamed himself out of the situation, he leaned towards Luke, pressing himself to his side and laying his head on Luke's shoulder. He immediately felt the warmth that he'd grown used to lately, as Luke put a comforting arm around his shoulders, and he let out a strained breath at the relief in his chest, letting his eyes fall closed.

He couldn't even be embarrassed because of how at ease he felt. Feeling made its way into his being again, and although that brought the pain in his ankle, which was throbbing a little after rushing down the stairs on it again.

Only a few silent minutes passed before the doorbell rang again, and this time both Dr. D and Chiron went to get the door together. They were all apprehensive, an adult that they didn't know was just coming in a moment where they were all vulnerable messes, even if said adult had a child of his own to be more worried about.

"Hades, it's been a while, though I wish the circumstances were different," Dr. D said at the front door, in a tone Percy had never heard before, respect and politeness mixed with doubt, "Come on in, Apollo is with Nico and Hazel."

"Dionysus, Chiron, did you and Apollo talk about what I told you the other day? I've looked into Dr. Miller's research and results, and I'm confident he can carry on the procedure so this can finally be a thing of the past."

"Why don't we talk about it more privately?" Chiron said as they made their way into the living room, "Kids, I hope you remember Mr. Dellamorte, Nico and Hazel's father."

"Hi." "Good morning, sir." "Hello."

"Hello to you all, now can we please discuss what we can do regarding Nico?"

"Of course, Nico's in here."

They disappeared behind the door to the infirmary, leaving them all buzzin and tense. None of them spoke, but fucking hell Percy wished he was back to not feeling a thing, because this was almost too much, and he was actually so close to walk outside barefoot and with only his current clothes on so that the bitter cold of the snow made it all numb.

Technically speaking, he could, but he would be in for a therapy session for sure and he certainly didn't want that. Sighing, he turned his face into Luke's shoulder, letting his hair cover his face partly. Well, he needed a haircut.

"Excuse me, but am I the only one curious as to what this 'procedure so this can be a thing of the past' is?" And the tension was broken as if it wasn't there to begin with.

"Of course not, Leo," that was Piper, sounding rather condescending, "trust me when I say that part caught all of our attention."

"Do you think he can do it?" Percy whispered softly before he could stop himself, "You think there's something that can really make his seizures disappear? He can be free from this shit for good?"

He was met with more silence, fragile and sharp enough to sting.

"I mean, most people with epilepsy are controlled with medication only, and surgery is only considered when it becomes impossible for the person to live a normal life, because well, brain surgery is complicated," Annabeth's discomfort was notable from the waver in her voice, but she didn't stop there, "but if Nico's father has found a neurosurgeon that can remove the focal point where his seizures originate and ensure it will have minimal cognitive or neurologic effects, it might be worth considering."

"How do you even know that?" Reyna asked, and peeking at her, Percy saw her help Annabeth into a more comfortable position. Annabeth only shrugged.

"Research, I like knowing as much as I can about everyone's condition."

Percy eyed her worriedly, and even if he felt like shit himself, she felt more important to him.

To their surprise, the door to the infirmary opened again, and a puffy eyed Hazel stepped out followed by Dr. D and Apollo. Piper stood up in a second, and met Hazel with a big hug, while the doctors slipped to the office. Percy was able to hear the words 'call' ' talk' 'Miller', but he was more focused on Hazel now.

She was crying softly, tears quietly making their way down her cheeks, but it looked like she was just now calming down slightly. Her breathing was coming in short controlled puffs, and in general she just looked exhausted.

All of Percy's own exhaustion could not matter less to him, as he forced himself to stand up on shaky legs and limp his way to Hazel's side still in Piper's arms, crutches long forgotten. Hazel looked up at him, and her composure fell a little, more tears welling up in her eyes, but not falling.

"He's awake and conscious right now," she whispered hoarsely, voice so broken it shattered Percy's already broken heart, "dad's talking to him about this surgeon that could help him, but I'm so scared- Nico's barely aware and dad's scared for him obviously but what if- brain surgery is so complicated- what if I- I can't lose him."

The tears fell harder than before, and Percy hugged her awkwardly as she was still somewhat clinging to Piper.

"You won't lose him, Hazel," he whispered back, noting the roughness of his own voice, and meeting Piper's concerned, tear filled eyes for a second, "we won't lose Nico, alright? He still has so much to fight for, and besides we can't be sure of all the implications right? But don't worry Hazel, Nico's too strong, he will make it."

"Zoe didn't."

Percy's breath hitched, ice wrapping around his heart, and thankfully Piper spoke next, because he's not sure he could have been able to, "Nico is not the same, Zoe- she knew she wouldn't make it, and I'm not sure she wanted to… But Nico does, because he looks forward to the future, right? Nico won't stop fighting, especially because of you."

Hazel looked up at Piper and then at Percy, who was trying his best to school his expression into one of assurance. Her tears were slowing down, and her eyes twinkled with hopefulness, Piper's words calming down her fears in the way only Piper could. She nodded faintly, casting her gaze towards her shoes again, and removing herself from their arms.

She opened her mouth about to say something, when a knock on the door surprised them, making Percy wince as she held onto his arm.

From the living room, Luke spoke, "We're not expecting anyone else, are we?"

"I don't think so, no."

Percy gently removed Hazel's hand, and casted a look at the others, who all wore impressions of confusion. Seeing as no one attempted to get the door, or any of the adults seemed to have heard the knock in the first place, he shrugged, and started half-limping half-jumping to answer. He was the closest to the door anyway.

"Fucking hell, Percy!" he heard Luke exclaim as he caught up with him holding his crutches, "Not only do we not know if a fucking robber or killer is at the door, you're not even using these."

"It's not too far," he grumbled, reluctantly grabbing the damned crutches, "I figured it wouldn't matter, I'm sick of these."

"Yeah well, only one or two weeks at most and you're done with them, just hang on 'til then."

They knocked on the office door as they passed, and maybe they would have waited if Percy wasn't one impatient bitch.

"Dr. D! There's someone at the door!" he shouted before throwing the door open without a care in the world. "Hello-"

As his eyes fell on the stern face of the man in front of him, his carefree attitude dropped, and he actually took a step back, bumping into Luke, who immediately sensed his unease and placed a hand on his arm. Not even his comforting touch could stop the jolt that went up his spine as his gaze took in the steely blue eyes, too cold and hard, and the perfect pristine grey suit the man wore. He couldn't point why, but the man simply made him feel agitated, even if he had made no move to speak or even greet them.

"Guys we're a bit occupied right now- oh." Dr. Apollo stepped out of the office, his brows creasing and a confused smile gracing his lips, "I didn't think you were for real- Dionysus, there is someone at the door."

Dr. Apollo stepped in front of them, and they took that as their cue to take some steps back. "Hello, good morning, I'm Dr. Apollo, I look after some of the kids here, I assume you are at the right place?"

"This is Delphi House, is it not?"

Percy knew Apollo well enough after the years, and knew when he was behaving in a 'I am not liking you but I have to be polite' way. "Of course! Do you happen to know one of the kids or-"

"Mr. Olympia, it is nice to finally meet you in person," Dr. D walked out too, past Percy and Luke with only a glance, "I didn't know we'd be expecting you today."

"Ah, Dr. Dionysus, I didn't know I had to ask to see if I could come visit my son."

Percy's eyes widened. Who had to bear this man as a father? Smelly Gabe may have hit him and he may know about physical abuse the most, but Percy sensed this man was just as bad in terms of abuse, even if it was in another form. He wouldn't wish anyone to have to stand him, much less any of his friends. Suddenly he was much more alert.

He could hear the stiffness in Dr. D's voice. He wasn't a person who took other's bullshit. "It's not mandatory, he is your son after all, but it's nice to be prepared, we're having a bustling morning today."

"It won't matter, I only wish to speak to my son for a moment about something important, it won't take long."

Dr. D inclined his head hesitantly, "Of course, Jason is in the living room along with the others, come inside."

Jason.

No. Not Jason. Not one of them deserved to have this man as a father. He had met him only for a few minutes and he already despised him.

As soon as they came into the view of the others, Percy locked his gaze on Jason, whose eyes widened before he hastily stood up, almost tripping with his own feet. Everyone was obviously taken aback by his reaction, Percy could see their concerned and confused expressions from his periphery, as his eyes stayed on Jason. He realized Annabeth was the only one who didn't react, besides a small frown, but that would be for later.

Not unlike him, Jason didn't take his eyes away from the man, but they shone with nervousness, and he bit on his lower lip.

"Father, it's been a long time, huh?" Despite how he oozed anxiety if you knew him even a little, Jason's voice was firm and steady, "How have you been? What brings you here on this nice morning?"

If Percy didn't know better, he'd say he sensed sarcasm and bitterness in his tone, but he truly couldn't picture Jason Grace actively choosing to behave bitter and sarcastic. It just went to show he didn't fully know all of his friends as much as he did.

"I simply came to talk to you about some important matters."

Jason's worry shattered in a second, mood doing a 180, eyes gaining enough intensity to somewhat glare at his father, "Actually, I'm dealing with much more important matters at the moment, my friends are sick and they need me."

"Cut the attitude, Jason," he snapped, but he gained his composure and remained stoic, "I understand you need to be here for your friends, I won't take much time."

Jason's glare lost its fire, replaced by curiosity. He crossed his arms as he turned to look behind him, staring at the slowly falling snow, "We can talk outside then, that way it actually won't take long."

Without another word, Jason turned around and his father followed him, still expressionless. Percy couldn't help the protectiveness even if it was more than clear Jason was more than capable to deal with him. Still, he wondered… a man like that wouldn't bother to appear unless it was something really important, did Jason think the same thing?

"Um, what just happened?" Hazel asked quietly, tears long dried, and sadness temporarily put aside.

"Jason doesn't have the best relationship with his dad," Annabeth sighed, shaking her head, "Let's just say Mr. Olympia isn't the most caring father, a faithful husband, or just empathetic of humans in general to be honest."

Luke snorted, "That's a way to say it, that man is cold as hell."

"Now, now, stop talking about the man like that," Dr. D told them disapprovingly, "you still have to respect him."

Leo raised both hands in a placating manner, "I mean, I'd obviously never met him, but from what Jason had told me, he doesn't really deserve-"

"I'm stopping you right there," Dr. D ran a hand down his face, muttering under his breath, "Lord, it's too early for this, I need more patience, or a good drink for that matter- Apollo, see if Hades and Nico have been able to talk or not, I'll be right there."

"Fuck this has been a morning," Piper whispered, leading Hazel to sit down with her, "I'd take Dr. D on that drink."

"Piper you can't even drink."

"That wouldn't stop me."

"What- what's Jason's father even doing here, though?" Percy said softly, letting Luke help him towards a seat.

"I don' know, the man is a mystery, I've known Jason and Thalia for a long time and I still can't figure their father out," Annabeth said still frowning, "I've never like him."

He turned to look at Jason, who was listening to what his father had to say with a mask of indifference, even if his shoulders were tense.

"Yeah, I can see why you don't like him, he doesn't seem trustworthy."

The door to the infirmary opened, and they all turned their heads expectantly, Hazel jumping to her feet. To their delight, a very exhausted-looking Nico came walking out, leaning most of his weight on his father, but still standing. Hazel rushed to hug him, and he relaxed against her, huggin back weakly.

"Nico! We're so glad you're okay!"

"You had us so worried, man, it's good to see you up."

He only threw them a feeble smile, and looked up to his dad, nodding. The man straightened his shoulders.

"Nico has decided to give the surgery a shot."

Dr. D came out of the office then, holding a stack of papers, eyebrows raised in surprise, but Hazel beat him to it.

"You have?" Her voice broke, as she pushed away from Nico, who continued to smile weakly.

"Yeah, I have a shot to leave these stupid seizures behind Hazel," he stopped to take a deep breath, "I'm tired of them, they can go away, so I'm having the surgery thing."

"Isn't that great news, daughter, I have contacted the surgeon already and he said we can bring Nico in to do some tests."

"That's- that's amazing news," Hazel whispered, pulling Nico close again, "I'm so proud of you Nico."

"Yeah man! We're happy you have a change to get out of this!"

"We all are proud of you, you're gonna beat that crap."

"Thanks guys," he was leaning against Hazel now, still looking too pale to be okay, "I can't imagine not being with y'all 14/7, though."

"Well, let's hope you'll have to learn, son, besides you could come whenever you wanted to" their father placed his hand on Nico's shoulder, "We should get going, the hospital where Dr. Miller works is a couple hours away."

"Ah- but, shouldn't we wait for an ambulance? Also I should bring my stuff."

"Don't worry about your stuff, we can come back to get it once you feel better, but I will take you on calling the ambulance, it's much safer."

"Allow me to get the phone," Chiron said, making his way to the office, "It'll be a pleasure to see Nico get better."

"I'm coming with you guys, obviously," Dr. Apollo said at last, "I've been Nico's physician for years, I wanna check everything and talk with Dr. Miller in person."

"We'll all be checking in on you however we can," Dr. D inclined his head, a kind smile on his face, which Nico returned weakly. His eyes were filled with tears, but he seemed too tired to say much, shoulders hunched and bags under his eyes.

In all honesty, Percy was trying not to think too much into it. The last time someone had gone into surgery to get better, well, Zoe had died. He couldn't stop his heart going a thousand miles an hour or his foot tapping hard on the floor with Nico getting surgery too. Especially since he was Nico. He couldn't stop his anxiety from rising.

"Ah, thank you Chiron, I'll call a contact of mine so that it comes fast-"

The man halted, as he turned to the snow-covered porch. Jason had his back to the door, leaving his father's face on full display. Jason was still tense, hands in fists at his sides, while his father's glare was so intense it reminded Percy of Smelly Gabe on his worst days. A shiver went down Percy's spine, that was not something pleasant to remember, nor to see on one of his friend's parent's faces.

Mr. Dellamorte was still staring at the other man's face as if he'd seen a ghost, one he would rather not have seen. Or maybe, one he had wanted to see.

"Dad? What's wrong?"

Mr. Olympia must have felt the staring, because he looked up, away from Jason, and his expression became a mirror of the other. His conversation with his son was cut short, and he walked past Jason, pushing the door open.

"Father, you can't just drop that and leave-" Jason cut himself, as both fathers stared at each other blankly, and his anger gave way to concern, "what's happening here?"

"It can't be," Mr. Dellamorte whispered.

"What can't be? Dad what's going on?"

Silence met Hazel's question, which further annoyed her, the crease between her eyebrows deepening. The room was buzzing, it was like electricity was floating in the atmosphere, and everyone was on edge. Hell, even the doctors looked confused out of their minds. Percy, on his part, was about this close to actually fainting because he just could not handle this right now, not this hostile mood.

Finally, Jason's father spoke.

"Well, have you forgotten your manners Hades, it's been decades I know, but this is no way to greet your brother."

.

.

AN: I know, it's been over two months, and I'm genuinely sorry, but too many things caught up with me, and depression kicked hard and life was too much for a while.

But good news first, I got into uni! I'm finally going to study what I love and what I've been waiting for for years, and I actually start this Monday (in two days basically). I'm really excited and nervous at the same time, but at least all my effort was worth it.

Now, I'm sorry for the sort of cliffhanger but I mean we all know they're brothers right? Anyway, this was originally going to be much longer, but honestly this has been hella difficult to write, and since I started this on november, the pacing and writing in general might be a little shitty in this chapter, but the thing is I had to split it bc I feel like this doc was slowing me down and I felt stuck on it, so I'm hoping that a brand new doc will ease me back into getting my shit together.

Also, I apologize if anything is medically inaccurate, I'm truly trying my best here, but I'm no doctor (yet) and inaccuracies are bound to happen despite my research.

Oh and another thing, thank you for your reviews, believe it or not they're what kept me going while depression was being a bitch. shoutout to the person that wrote in french lol I had to run that through google translate, and also big thank you to the person that's reading this even though they don't ship it (lukercy is not my favorite either dw, but it's just what vibed best with this story)

Again, I'm sorry I took this long, I promise I won't take two months again, but I don't promise when the next one's coming cause that depends on how I find my pace with uni :) I hope you liked this one, I really do put my all in here.