Authors note: Another Tuesday, another chapter. We can't wait for Kurt to meet Blaine's family! Love all of you guys! A&K
Chapter 15:
Kurt:
Stopping at a red light, I nervously adjusted my tie and checked the fruit tart I had made where it rested on the passenger seat. It was fine, of course, and my tie was fine. Everything was fine. Blaine had invited me to a family dinner with Cooper, his wife Alexa whom I hadn't met, Camilia, and Blaine's mom. Most of his family seemed to like me, but I knew from Blaine's phone call with his dad yesterday that their family situation wasn't perfect. He did seem happy for us to go to this dinner though, so maybe it would be alright. I didn't know too much about Alexa or if she might like me. I had meant to ask Blaine more about her, but it seemed we got very distracted when we were together. I laughed to myself and sighed as I remembered all the kissing... and the touching... We hadn't gone very far yet, (it seemed like we got interrupted too damn much) but I was excited about the possibility. No wonder Blaine likes doing stuff like this so much. I chewed on my fingernail while trying to ignore the anxiety welling up in my chest.
What if Blaine wasn't satisfied? What if he wanted more than I was ready to give right now? Was I ready right now? I groaned and tried to shake off my feelings as I pulled into Blaine's driveway where he was locking his front door. I licked my lips at the sight of him. I have no idea how he managed to make just jeans and some nerdy t shirt look so hot, but he did it well. I picked up my tart and hopped out of my car since Blaine was driving us to his brother's. He eyed me appreciatively and tilted my chin up to plant a sweet kiss on my lips.
"Hey, babe. You look hot." I smiled back and smoothed my hands down my shirt.
"Thanks. That shirt does wonderful things for your arms." I winked and noticed the woman on his shirt. "Is that Princess Leia?" He grinned widely, showing off his teeth and making his eyes do that crinkly thing.
"Yes, it is. Star Wars rules; don't judge me." I shook my head.
"To be so popular, you are a huge nerd." He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close as I shrieked a warning about not squishing my dessert. He took it gently and laid it on the roof of his car.
"Don't forget about it up there! I didn't spend forty-five minutes chopping fruit for it to be left on your roof."
"Shhh, I won't forget it." He kissed me gently again, pressing his body against mine. I felt myself melt against him like every time we kissed. I gave in to the desire to grasp his arms and I moaned into his mouth as we started kissing more deeply. I felt his hands slip down to grasp my ass and I involuntarily pushed back into his hands. He started trailing kisses across my jaw line and down my neck and I felt him squeeze again. My pants were starting to tighten when I heard a child's laugh from down the street and remembered we were very much in public.
Publicly making out and groping each other in Blaine's driveway. Oh god! We were going to scar his neighbors for life! I pulled back out of Blaine's reach and he whined in protest.
"Blaine! We can't! There are children a few yards down!"
"Damn. You should have come over sooner." He stared at my lips, which I'm sure were swollen. I felt a laugh bubble up at his disheveled hair and glazed eyes.
"Come on, we will be late." I tugged Blaine into the car and willed my erection to go away. Blaine pulled his pants up a little and slid into the drivers seat. He turned the key and began to back out before slamming on the breaks.
"What the hell, Blaine? Why did you do that?" I said from my vice grip on the door handle. He pointed up sheepishly to the ceiling.
"Uh, your fruit pizza?" I gasped and leaned out to rescue it. In my lust-driven haze, I had almost forgotten it. We started to go again with the tart safely in my lap.
Thankfully, it wasn't very long before we were pulling into Cooper and Alexa's driveway. While their house was not as big or immaculately manicured as Blaine's, it was nice and looked cozy. There was a pink and baby blue bicycle dropped on its side in the front yard and a swing on the porch. Well cared-for flowers and plants were everywhere in the yard and the flower beds. I smiled at the homey feel as I gathered up the tart and climbed out of Blaine's car carefully. He pulled me up by my hand and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before leading me to the front door. Blaine opened the door without knocking and held it open for me. Upon entering, we were met with the clanging of pans from the kitchen and giggles from what I knew had to be Camilia. The interior of their house was similar to the outside with family pictures and plants everywhere along with the occasional toy. I didn't get the chance to admire the pictures because Blaine had pulled me into the kitchen where a sparkling pink blur attacked me.
"Kurtie! You are here! I can't wait to show you my room and my books and my tiaras and-" Blaine peeled the youngest Anderson off of my legs and swung her up to his eye level.
"What about Bb? Don't you love me anymore?" He pouted and she wrapped her little arms around his neck, kissing him on his cheek.
"Of course I love you, Bb. Kurtie has just never come to my house before." She was dressed in a sequined princess dress and her ever-present pig had a matching one.
"It's really nice to see you again, Camilia." I petted her pig and admired their dresses. "Very pretty! I would love to see your stuff later." Camilia grinned widely, showing off her missing tooth. A noise behind us caused me to turn around and see Copper in a very feminine red gingham apron complete with bows. He had a mixing bowl in one hand and a whisk in the other and he was just staring open mouthed at me.
"Who are you?" I gave Blaine a questioning look who shrugged like he was used to this kind of thing.
"Um, Kurt? It's the guy from the other day... When you dropped off Camilia? Blaine and I started dating recently..." He waved the whisk around causing something that looked like eggs to go flying everywhere.
"I know, I never forget a fan!" (I could feel Blaine roll his eyes.) "I mean, what kind of mystical, magical creature are you to make my daughter fall in love with you? What's your secret?" I shrugged.
"The power of singing?" He pointed the whisk at me dramatically.
"Aha! So you're a siren? Knew it! And you've put Blainey under your spell as well?"
"The only thing Kurt used to put me under his spell is that ass." He yelped as I slapped him on the arm.
"Blaine! There is a child present!" I could feel myself flushing while the brother just laughed.
"Blaine Anderson, I know you didn't just cuss in front of my baby." The voice had come from one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen in my life. Alexa Anderson was tall and walked in a way I could only call regal. She had a beautiful dark complexion and soft brown eyes that her daughter had inherited. I noticed a multicolored scarf wrapped around her head and I wondered if her hair had fallen out due to chemo. She glided over to Blaine who was still holding Camilia and gave him a warm hug. Blaine hugged her back and Camilia pulled on the leg of her jeans.
"Mommy, this is Kurtie! He sings like a beautiful angel! His mommy sang the Babe song, so he knows it too and he sang it to me!" Alexa nodded patiently at her daughter's enthusiasm before hugging me next.
"It's very nice to meet you, Kurt. Thank you for placating my daughter the other day. It's hard to find the strength to sing some days." Up close, I could see the dark circles under her eyes and how her cheeks sunk in a little.
"Oh, it was no problem. Camilia is the sweetest." Camilia giggled and hid her face in her pig's fur.
"Lex, Blaine's boyfriend is a real live siren. It's confirmed." Cooper had gone back to whisking whatever was in the bowl while Alexa put a hand on her hip.
"Coop, leave the poor boy alone." She smiled warmly at me again. "Do you want me to take that for you?" She motioned to the tart, which I had completely forgotten about until she mentioned it.
"Oh, yes. Right. Can I put it on the table?" She nodded and sat in a comfortable looking chair in the corner as Camila eased in her lap.
"That would be perfect. Thank you for bringing it. It looks delicious!" I preened a bit, knowing how good it looked and tasted.
"Thank you. It's very healthy too! I learned to make it for my dad. He's had heart problems, but refuses to eat healthy food unless it tastes good so-" I was interrupted by the clatter of something hitting the counter. We all looked to Cooper who had dropped the spatula he was using and was muttering something about a tiny prince to himself while staring straight ahead.
"Uh oh. Daddy's got an idea." Camilia stated. Cooper laughed loudly and tore the apron off.
"Thank you! It's perfect! I've got it! Yes!" He scampered over to Camilia and Alexa and kissed them both soundly before doing the same to Blaine and me. I jerked away horrified as he continued to chuckle with a manic glint in his eye.
"Don't take too long, Coop. Your mom should be here soon!" Alexa called after her retreating husband. She eyed him lovingly and turned to me. "I'm sorry about that. He gets so excited and when he gets a good idea, he has to write it down quick. He will be right back. In the meantime..." She patted Camilia so she would get off of her lap and started to rise shakily. Blaine grabbed her arm and gently pushed her back down.
"No, Lex. You should rest. I know you've had a few good days, but don't overdo it." She raised a defiant eyebrow at Blaine.
"Well, are you going to finish dinner then?" Blaine looked at the mess on the counter and seemed much less confident.
"If there is a recipe I can follow, I would be happy to help." I was already tying the apron Cooper had abandoned around my waist. Alexa shook her head.
"Oh, no Kurt! I couldn't ask you to do that. Just give me a minute to rest and I'll finish it. Camilia scooted back into her mother's lap holding a coloring book.
"I wanted you to help me color, mommy." Blaine shuffled next to me.
"There's your answer, Lex. You get stuck with the terror and I'll help Kurt with dinner." He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my neck causing me to shiver with pleasure."You are so hot you can even pull off that apron, babe." I swatted at him with the spatula.
"Because fashion has no gender. Less flirting, more stirring!" Blaine muttered darkly and rubbed his hand as I felt a tug on my apron. Camilia and "Babe" were smiling up at me.
"What can we do to help?" I bent down and gestured to her princess dress.
"Well first, I would change out of that because you don't want to get food on it. Then when you come back, you can help with the rolls." She squealed happily and tore off down the hall towards her bedroom.
"Blaine, you finish the salad and I'll work on the chicken. Don't look at me like that, Anderson. I've made this before and you haven't."
"I'm just saying, I can handle more responsibility than just the salad. Let me do the sauce." I eyed him with a raised eyebrow.
"You're sure? You won't put too much garlic in it?" He laid a hand over his heart.
"I swear on all your McQueen that I will not put too much garlic in it." I shook my head and pointed at the recipe card.
"Two cloves. I'm watching you, Anderson." He bumped hips with me and smirked.
"Okay, two giant cloves of garlic."
"There is such a thing as too much garlic, Blaine."
"Never. Give me all the garlic."
"I'm not kissing you anymore if your breath smells like garlic."
"You could never resist me."
"You two are like an old married couple." Alexa was watching us with a warm grin.
"A fabulous old married couple." I winked as Camilia came bounding back in.
"Look, Kurtie! My hands are clean and I have my apron on!" She was wearing a child-sized version of the one I was wearing and looking absolutely adorable.
"Perfect! You can put the rolls on the pan while I fix this chicken and make sure your crazy uncle doesn't ruin our food." I pulled a barstool over to the counter and set her up with the pan and rolls. She very carefully set each roll out on the pan while Blaine and I squabbled about the basil this time. Alexa chuckled at our shenanigans, throwing in a comment here and there. We were close to finishing when Cooper reappeared.
"Well, I would apologize for not finishing dinner, but it looks like I wasn't even missed." He perched on the arm of Alexa's chair and kissed the top of her head. Alexa smiled at us and laced her fingers with his.
"Kurt is amazing. Never let him go, Blaine. I've never seen Camilia take to someone like this." The child was currently hugging my waist and begging me to sing some more. I shrugged as I wiped the counter off.
"What can I say? I tend to pull focus." Blaine snorted and popped the chicken parmesan in.
"Maybe we can get you two to babysit her one day soon so Lex and I can have a date night. Camilia squealed and jumped up and down.
"Yes! Please say yes, Kurtie! We can sing songs and watch movies and have a tea party-" I smiled fondly and remembered my tea parties.
"That would be fine with me. I probably have my old tea set somewhere..." Blaine sniggered as I glared daggers at him.
"Something you would like to say?" I tried not to smile and look stern with my hands on my hips. Blaine licked his lips, obviously trying to think of a way out of the hole he was digging.
"Oh, nothing. Just thinking about a tiny Hummel at a cute little tea party." He winked at me as I rolled my eyes. Camilia had wrapped her little arms around my hips again and jumped up and down.
"Will you please come babysit me? Please, please, please?" I laughed and got down on her level.
"I would love to come babysit you." She leapt on me and squeezed my neck in a hug.
Alexa:
"And then he shaved his hair, but he couldn't reach it all so it was in big clumps all over!" Cooper laughed hysterically. Blaine was glaring at his brother, arms crossed over his chest. Kurt was trying to stifle his laughter behind his hand while Camilia clutched his arm in glee. "I called him Swamp Monster for a month until it could grow back in. He nipped one of his eyebrows too. Looked like he got into a fight like a weed eater!" Everyone (besides Blaine) dissolved into laughter again as Cooper pounded the table.
"Can we talk about something else? Literally anything else." Blaine was shooting daggers at Kurt now. He shook his head. "My own boyfriend and niece turning against me. That's cold." Kurt leaned over to kiss his cheek and shake his shoulders.
"Aw, come on! We are just kidding. I think it's cute. A tiny Anderson with a cute little bushy afro?" Blaine rolled his eyes. Their relationship was very sweet. I could tell they were good with each other. Blaine seemed less angry and tense now.
"I was paranoid that there really were tiny little creatures in my hair! Maybe you should write horror stories, Coop." I rested a hand on my husband's arm. He stopped laughing immediately and looked me over the careful way he always did. Like he was making sure I was still breathing. I smiled reassuringly, even though I was fighting a little nausea and pain.
"Sweetie, how about we tell some other stories? Ones that don't make Blaine want to murder you?" Cooper smiled softly and kissed my hand. I felt warmth flood in my chest with love for this man. He may be wild and enjoy teasing his little brother more than he should, but he had a heart of gold.
"Anything for you, my queen." I shook my head and smiled.
"Awww!" Kurt and Camilia were hugging each other and watching us. Even Blaine was staring with a happy smirk.
"Daddy, if mommy is your queen, does that make me your princess?" My sweet baby girl looked up at him hopefully. Cooper leaned over the table to look her in the eye.
"You are definitely my princess. The most special, sweet, and brave princess I have ever met." Kurt wiped away a tear. I knew my Cooper would be the most wonderful dad since the first night we had her in the hospital. I was exhausted from labor and Cooper took over, letting me sleep and recover. It seemed like he just got better and better at being a father each day. Suddenly, the door was shut with a bang and Pam bustled in, arms laden with a briefcase, purse, and a bottle of wine.
"Hey everyone! I'm so sorry that I am late. I had to meet with my lawyer... the divorce." I felt Cooper tense beside me and Blaine did as well. I rubbed a comforting circle along Cooper's arm and I saw Kurt doing the same to Blaine. Kurt must me a fast learner. My mother-in-law first kissed Blaine and Camilia, then Kurt, much to his surprise. She made her way to us and Cooper and I received a kiss as well. Our family was definitely an affectionate one.
"Pam, we made you a plate. It's in the microwave." She thanked me and offered some wine. I shook my head no. With the medication I was on, alcohol wasn't a good idea. I turned my attention to Kurt then. "So Kurt, how long have you and Blaine been together?"
"Yeah, we asked Squirt, but all he did was talk about how pretty you were and how you sing like an angel-" Cooper was interrupted by Blaine throwing a fork at his head.
"Shut up! Can you go like five seconds without trying to embarrass me?" Cooper stared at him blankly.
"I don't know, Blainey. You aren't enunciating or pointing, so I don't know how serious you are." Before Blaine could snap and murder his brother, Kurt jumped in.
"Well, we have known each other for years and been friends for a few weeks after a minor disagreement," Blaine snorted as Kurt continued. "but we've only been dating for a few days. It's still pretty new." He was looking at Blaine with a love struck expression while Blaine was picking at the table cloth and blushing. Well, he had it bad.
"Oooh, Blainey is blushing!" Copper sing-songed. Pam finished chewing her bite of chicken parmesan and snapped her fingers at Cooper.
"That's enough, Cooper Edward! You leave your little brother alone." She wiped her mouth while Cooper pouted. Blaine shot his brother a smug look as Pam sipped her wine.
"I did want to talk to talk to you about the divorce since I have everyone here all together and that doesn't happen often." She turned to Kurt. "I'm sorry that you have to be here for this, honey. I know this is more of a family matter, but I have to take advantage of all of us being together." I reached over to hold Cooper's hand. I knew how wound up Cooper got about his father. He was smiling, but it was tight and his eyes were glinting with anger. I smiled encouragingly at Pam to go on.
"Now, I know that your father hasn't endeared himself to anyone at this table, but now that divorce proceedings are underway, I don't want you boys to feel like you have to choose a side." I glanced at Blaine who was glaring at the table now and crossing his arms tightly over his chest. Kurt had scooted closer to him and was rubbing his back in a comforting manner. Camila had become interested in her coloring book. Pam sighed and pushed her plate away. She had begun to use her professional voice, the one she convinced juries with and reasoned with clients. Eyes closed, she folded her hands in front of her face and rested her chin on her manicured fingers. That color looked good on her.
"Your father may give you a call soon-"
"He already has. I told him to shove it up-" Blaine glanced at Camilia and amended his language. "I told him he was on his own." Cooper's hand tightened on mine. He laughed, but I recognized his rage simmering under the surface.
"I won't. Blocked his number right before Lex and I got married. You remember how well our rehearsal dinner went." Sarcasm dripped from his words. I nudged him and gave a meaningful look towards our daughter. While she was used to everyone bad mouthing her grandfather, I didn't want to have the conversation about why she really had never met him until she was much older. Cooper nodded in understanding and cleared his throat.
"Maybe we should wait to have this conversation when Cam is in bed." Pam glanced at her and Kurt stood up.
"Hey, how about we go watch a movie in the living room?" He tugged Camilia's hand and she smiled brightly.
"Can we watch Babe? We can sing the songs!" I had to smile at her enthusiasm.
"May we, Cam. Not can we. May to ask, can to do."
"Oops. May we watch Babe? Please?" Kurt nodded and she bounded off to find her favorite movie. Cooper mouthed a, thank you to Kurt who responded with a nod. He kissed Blaine gently on the cheek and followed our daughter into the living room. Cooper was so angry discussing his father that he didn't even tease Blaine about the kiss. Pam waited until the opening music from the movie could be heard before she resumed.
"Blaine, I didn't know he called you. When was this?"
"Yesterday." He spat. "He wanted me to testify in court. I have no idea why, especially since he's wanted nothing to do with me since I was fourteen." Pam sighed and rubbed her temples. She looked tired.
"Well, I'll talk to him. I want him to leave you out of this mess." She eyed both of her sons. "I don't want any of you involved. This is between the two of us." Cooper growled quietly beside me. Blaine clenched his jaw. I decided to speak up since the boys were both a second away from snapping.
"Pam, we appreciate it, but you shouldn't have to handle all this alone. We will help however we can." She gave me a tired but grateful smile.
"Oh, my dear. You can help me by focusing on getting well. I don't want you to worry about anything but that." She reached her tiny hand across the table and patted my hand that was still draped over Cooper's.
"Is he giving you shit, mom?" Blaine gritted out. She shook her head.
"Honey, don't curse. But he has given me problems since we got married. I can't regret marrying him though, otherwise I wouldn't have you all." Blaine sank back into the chair, still grinding his teeth into nubs. Cooper had relaxed a little, but I could tell he was still wrestling with his anger.
"Anyway," Pam continued. "I wanted to give you warning that he may call you to testify. If he does, you will have to go, but I've already talked to John and he's agreed to represent any of you if that happens."
"I won't do it!" Blaine hit his fist against the table. His face was flushed and his eyes had gotten dark. "He can send a fucking tank to get me and I will say nothing to help him. I won't do it. He's the one who's wrong, mom." Pam sighed again at this outburst and threw back the rest of her wine.
"Blaine, I'm not saying he's right, but I haven't been perfect either. I should have divorced him a long time ago. Maybe he wouldn't have hurt you all as much if I had... I was just trying to keep my family together." My heart went out to her. I could understand the sentiment completely as a mother. Blaine scoffed.
"No, mom. He's the problem. Not you. I know you are busy and not around as much," (Pam winced) "but the fact is that if he wasn't such a jackass then you wouldn't have to work as hard."
"Look, the fact is that we don't owe him a thing. He hasn't been there for us for years." Cooper interjected.
"He's still your father." I reminded them gently. Cooper scrubbed at his face.
"He may be my father, but after the way he has treated every one of us, especially you, I owe him nothing. Respect is earned. Just because he was there when I was conceived and was nice to me until I did things my own way doesn't mean I won't cut him and his toxic attitude out of my family's life to protect you." He was breathing hard and clutching my hands in his. I reached up to touch his cheek and pull him in for a kiss. "You of all people have every right to tell him to take a hike." I nodded.
"While that is true, we can remain civil and do what's needed without getting all worked up. I won't let him control my life by being angry all the time."
Everyone was quiet for awhile, the atmosphere tense until we heard the sweet sound of Camilia and Kurt singing that song she loved so much. Everyone around the table broke out into helpless grins and Blaine was blushing.
"Told you he sings like a fucking angel."
"Blaine Devon!" He raised his hands in surrender.
"Sorry, mom." Pam stood up resolutely.
"Alright, that's enough of letting your father steal our peace tonight. How about we see if those two want to play a game?" We all nodded while Cooper cleaned up the remaining dishes on the table.
...
Blaine:
My boyfriend was many things. He was beautiful, sweet, amazing, and funny.
He was also a fucking cheater.
"Kurt Hummel. Look in my eyes and tell me you didn't kill Mr. Boddy. Keep in mind if you lie to me, you're getting nothing from me for a month." He was biting his lip while trying not to smile.
"I am not the murderer. You're the one cheating since you're discussing game play."
"Blaine Devon, you have been dating for only a few days. I thought I taught you how to be a gentleman?" We winced, suddenly remembering that we weren't alone. My mom was shaking her head in a disappointed fashion (if only she knew how big of a disappointment I had been in the past year. Yikes) and Cooper was tickling Camilia's neck while Alexa watched, an amused expression on her face. We had pulled out Cooper's old game of Clue and had it spread out on the table.
"I'm kidding, mom." I eyed Kurt and mouthed, Not kidding. He giggled adorably and rolled the dice.
"I'm going to the library and I think it was Mr. Green, in the library, with the lead pipe." I shook my head in a mock serious pout.
"How dare you, Hummel? I thought we had trust? I sang Milkshake to you, baby. And I meant it!" Kurt laughed in that flirty way that way that he knew drove me insane.
"Blaine! This is how we play the game! I have to ask or else I won't be able to win."
"You won't be winning since I'm going to win." I gave him my best sexy smile that usually had guys (and girls) melting in a puddle in front of me. He gave just as good as he got, fixing me with raised eyebrow and sultry smirk that made me want to pounce on him. He was so getting it later.
"As soon as you two are done having eye sex, I would like to take my turn please." Cooper's voice was slightly muffled since the dork had taped a comb to his upper lip so he could "get into character better" and "capture the essence that was Colonel Mustard." God, he was obnoxious.
"What's eye sex, daddy?" Camilia was looking up innocently from her place in Cooper's lap.
"Yes dear, explain it to our six year old daughter. That was totally not inappropriate at all." Alexa said in a tone that suggested there would be a discussion later that evening. Cooper looked down sheepishly and patted Camilia's head.
"I'll tell you later. Can we move this along, boys?"
"I already made my accusation. Cards anyone?" Kurt said teasingly. I shook my head and licked my lips slowly. I knew my cards because I'm a boss and took the opportunity to flirt with Kurt. I smiled in smug satisfaction when he followed my tongue with his eyes and swallowed. Mom cleared her throat and passed Kurt a card along with Alexa. He checked boxes off of his list.
"Thought so. Just letting you guys know that I'm going to win. That was the last one Miss Peacock and I needed." He said sassily. He thought he was being so funny choosing that character. Which reminded me...
You're so gay and you don't even like boys
No you don't even like
No you don't even like
No you don't even like boys
You're so gay and you don't even like boys
No you don't even like
No you don't even like
No you don't even like
Kurt jumped and yanked his phone out of his pocket to silence my latest ringtone change. I discreetly slipped my phone back into my jeans pocket while he blushed furiously. Everyone was silent until Cooper cleared his throat.
"Well Kurt, I got to say that I am a bit confused. I was under the impression that you and my brother were dating, but I'm getting some mixed signals here..."
"Blaine Anderson!" Kurt hissed. "Leave my ringtone alone or I swear I'm changing it back to your brother singing the free credit rating jingle!" Cooper beamed like the idiot he was as my mom started to giggle, followed by Alexa and Camilia (who probably had no idea what we were laughing about, but she wanted to be in on the joke.) Kurt got up and went into the kitchen. Uh oh. Maybe he was really mad at me and he was leaving. I started after him only to be met with something wet being smeared across my face. It was a shock and the room went quiet again.
"You are dead, Hummel!" I wiped some of what I now realized was the whipped cream for his fruit pizza thing and flicked it back at Kurt. He squealed and ran away as everyone started giggling again. Kurt hid behind my mom like the coward he was.
"Please! This is Alexander McQueen!" He was laughing so hard he could hardly get his words out. I had gathered a glob of it from my face and was advancing on my squirming boyfriend.
"Too bad. You knew what would happen." I slung the cream at him only to miss and hit mom on top of her head.
"Blaine Devon!" Oh, shit! I backed away with my hands up.
"Now mom, it was Kurt's fault really! He was the intended target!" She glared at me for a moment and then tossed her ice water right into my face. After getting over the shock, I wiped the freezing drips out of my eyes and stared open-mouthed at my mom.
"Seriously, mom? I'm your favorite son!" She grinned wickedly while Kurt sniggered behind her.
"I was just trying to help you clean the rest of your face off, dear." I gasped as another cold splash hit me from beside me. Cooper was pointing at me.
"How dare you insinuate that you are the favorite! I am offended!" Camilia was giggling madly as she tossed water at Cooper.
"Bath time, daddy!" He flopped to the floor dramatically and pretended to sob.
"My own child! Betraying me!" He leaped up and sprang into the kitchen, returning with more whipped cream which he threw at me.
"This is your fault, Blainey! And you too, Kurt!" He tossed some at Kurt who gasped and returned fire. The rest of our evening was spent laughing and then cleaning up the giant mess we all made.
...
I walked with Kurt out to my car as he waved bye to the rest of my family.
"Make sure you're home by curfew, Blaine! I know how long it takes to drive him home!" I rolled my eyes where my mom couldn't see (I wasn't stupid) and replied that I would be home soon. We shut our car doors and Kurt was smiling widely at me.
"I really love your family, Blaine. Do you think they like me?" I felt my heart flutter a little at his hopeful expression. He was so fucking cute and I couldn't wait to get him back to his car so I could kiss him. No way was I making out with him within a mile of Cooper's house. He would never let me hear the end of it.
"They love you, babe. I am going to have to fight Camila off with a stick though. She's definitely in love with you." He laughed and leaned his head back against the seat. "You're an idiot. She's a sweetheart and so is Alexa. How did Cooper manage to get her to marry him?"
"Lots of shameless begging." Kurt snorted as I started my car and pulled out. "I don't know. She's so amazing and he really loves her. They make a great team." Kurt nodded, but didn't speak. I could tell he was holding something back by the way he was pursing his lips.
"Kurt, go ahead. I know you have something to say." He took a deep breath and gently landed his hand on mine where it rested on the gear shift. My heart did a floppy thing as he cleared his throat.
"What's the deal with your dad? I mean, I know he doesn't approve of you being gay, and I know something happened with your mom. Honestly he sounds like an ass, but why did Cooper cut him off?" I sighed. Here we go...
"So, my dad is pretty much like the dementors from Harry Potter; he drains peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around him."
"Wow, you're such a nerd."
"Shut up, Hummel." We grew serious again and I continued.
"Anyway, he's fine if you are doing what he thinks you should do, but if you dare to have your own thoughts and opinions, then you are basically dead to him. I tell him I'm gay, he ignores me until I 'change my mind.' Cooper says he wants to act, he cuts him off financially. He says he's marrying Lex, dad says says he won't support the wedding. Mom stands up to him, he cheats on her. He is just very manipulative." Kurt stared at me and waited for me to finish. He shook his head.
"Wow, that's awful. I'm so sorry about that." I shrugged.
"We can't all have cool dads like yours." He laughed again.
"My dad is not cool. You would know this if you ever saw him dance." He nudged my arm. "I know what you are saying though and I know I'm lucky." He was quiet for a moment.
"How can your dad hate Alexa though? She's so nice." I tried to squash the anger I felt on their behalf. Sometimes I wish I could punch my dad.
"Because she's not the 'right kind of woman for Cooper.'"
"Not wealthy?" Kurt guessed.
"Black." I ground out. Kurt opened his mouth to reply and then shut it again. I turned down the street as he suddenly sputtered back to life.
"Seriously? Your dad is an ass. What the hell is wrong with him? And your mom is so nice! How could someone like her be with someone like him? How can someone be racist in this day and age? I kind of want to punch him. No, I really want to punch him." I turned my hand over and linked my fingers with Kurt's before giving them a reassuring squeeze. He started to calm down, but his face was still red from anger.
"Calm down. I know my dad sucks. Believe me. But I don't want to focus on him. Let's talk about how you laughed at all my childhood pain tonight." He grinned and played with my fingers.
"It was precious. Your mom is going to show me your baby pictures when we get together for manicures. Is it true you were in a baby beauty pageant?" I pulled into my driveway next to Kurt's car and growled.
"Yeah, that is so not happening. I will cut you off." He rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. I crossed my arms and turned towards my window. I could hear him giggling behind me as I fake pouted.
"Fine, I guess I will just have to kiss the tender crook of my elbow instead of my beautiful boyfriend. And I just reapplied my lip balm." He sighed loudly and unbuckled his seat belt. Before he could reach his door handle, I snatched his hand away and I was kissing him all over his face.
"No! You can't leave me! Who will make me fruit pizzas and tell me when I'm being an idiot and cheer for only me at football games and-" He laughed and tried to catch his breath as he fended off my enthusiastic advances.
"Oh my god! Get off of me you ridiculous person! I was kidding!" He stared up into my eyes and all I could think was that he was so beautiful. His smiled melted into a different look that I hoped was lust. I leaned back down and kissed him gently, causing him to gasp into my mouth and pull me closer by the back of my neck. I was stretched across the console over to his side of the car. His hands were skimming my shoulders and back, then scratching into my skin. I realized I had no idea when he had pulled my shirt up, but here we were and it was amazing. His lips were so soft and sweet on mine as he started to lick into my mouth. I felt myself moan against his lips as I cupped his face in my hands. He was moaning too and then I felt something hard against my leg. My heart started beating fast and I pulled back to look in his eyes. I couldn't push him into doing stuff this early in our relationship. That was what the old Blaine did and I was trying to be different. Truth be told, I was getting a little excited myself just from kissing, which had never happened to me before Kurt.
"Baby, I think we should slow down a bit, don't you?" He nodded, face flushed and looking a little embarrassed. I ran my thumb across his smooth cheek and tried to make him feel better about popping a boner.
"It's impressive, don't get me wrong. Kinda gets me hard just thinking about it, but I think we need to wait don't you?" Now he just looked really confused as he licked his kiss-swollen lips.
"Uh, are you talking about my dick Blaine? 'Cause you do realize that's the gear shift you're laying on, right?" I could feel myself starting to blush as I laughed nervously. Wow, I felt like a dumb ass.
"I totally knew that, Kurt. Just checking that you are alright." We both sat back up in our seats and laughed. He started smoothing my hair back down lovingly, saying it had gotten crazy in our impromptu make out session. I rolled my eyes, but I wondered if I had the same smitten look on my face that he did. I gripped the steering wheel, running my palms up and down the smooth surface.
"Thanks for coming to eat with my family tonight. I know it's not really a date, but it kind of felt like one to me. I really like you, Kurt, and I can't wait to see you tomorrow. I know that makes me a huge dork, but I don't care. I really like being your boyfriend, even I almost blew it thinking I would turn out like my dad. Which still could happen." He smiled during my little declaration, his eyes going a little misty towards the end and his hands still holding mine. He shook his head, still smiling.
"I had a great time and it counts as a date to me. I... really like you too, Blaine. I could really just kick myself for all the time I wasted trying to hate you when we could have had this. I'm nothing if not stubborn I guess." He gave another soft laugh and looked down. "I can't wait to see you either. I love being your boyfriend." He looked up onto my eyes, his going a steely blue. "And you are nothing like your father, Blaine. You are kind and accepting and honest and-" I didn't let him get any further before I kissed him firmly on the mouth, trying to pour all of my feelings into it. Man, I was in trouble. He kissed back and rested his forehead against mine with his eyes still closed as we caught our breath.
"...and a wonderful kisser." He finished and we both smiled. He frowned after a minute.
"What?"
"It's a tart, not a fruit pizza." My expression must have clued him in on the fact that my mind was nowhere near his at the moment, because he huffed and started to exit the car. "Earlier you said 'fruit pizza' and it's a tart that I made for dessert. A fruit pizza is completely different. He was so cute. I wrapped my arms around him as we met in front of my car and kissed his nose gently.
"You're cute."
"I'm not cute." He scowled.
"You're cute and I'm going to kiss you goodnight so you don't get any ideas about stealing my virtue. I know how you Cheerios are." He smacked my shoulder playfully as he kissed me back.
"Oh please, you're the weirdo who was about to fuck your car a few minutes ago."
"Wow, so fucking funny. You're just jealous the car gets to fuck me and you don't." He kissed the corner of my mouth and pulled back a bit, but was still close enough to brush his lips against mine.
"I kind of am." He whispered without looking away from my eyes. I was so shocked at his words that I just gaped at him as he winked at me and spun on his heel towards his car. I would have totally followed him in there if my mom hadn't pulled around the corner.
"Bye, Blaine. Sweet dreams!" He waved innocently. I waved back like a love struck idiot as I heard my mom's car door slam.
"Did you have a good night, sweetie?" I nodded and she laughed at my face. "Come on, Casanova, it's a school night and you need to go to bed." I followed her in, rubbing the back of my neck.
"You like Kurt, don't you mom?" She paused as she was shuffling through the mail.
"I do, Blaine. Do you?" I smiled and headed up to my room.
"You have no idea."
...
Songs used:
Ur So Gay- Katy Perry