Chapter Thirteen: Penance

**TRIGGER WARNING: Physical Abuse and Homophobia**

"No, no, no." The blonde groaned, her breath hot against Callie's lips as the ortho surgeon's pager went off for the third time in the past few minutes. Sighing, the brunette rolled over, the sheets twisting around her body as she fumbled for the beeping device on the nightstand.

"Oh damn." Callie grabbed her underwear off the floor and slipped them on hurriedly, running to the closet in search of clothes.

"What?" The blonde called out sitting up, a hand securing the sheets against her front. "What is it?"

"Hansen paged me 911." The ortho surgeon reappeared, now wearing a pair of sweatpants and tugging on a large t-shirt. "Hansen. The guy who hates me because I'm out for his job? It's gotta be big if he acknowledges he's in over his head."

"Or maybe he just doesn't want to go into work at 3am," The fetal surgeon hypothesized weakly, knowing full well it was unlikely but not ready to break the paradisiacal bubble they had just spent hours in. "Can't somebody cover for you?"

"Can't," Callie replied shortly, looking in the mirror as she pulled her hair up into a ponytail. "Riley is out of town and letting Callahan take over really would be a death sentence." She chuckled at Arizona's pouty face and crossed back into the closet.

"Put some clothes on." The brunette ordered, tossing a pair of pants to her ex-wife before heading into the other room to retrieve shoes.

"Why?" Arizona called out, raising an eyebrow quizzically. "They didn't call me in."

"They didn't," The ortho surgeon confirmed as she returned to view, leaning against the doorframe to pull on socks. "But there's an on-call room with our name on it." The brunette winked and disappeared from the door. The blonde didn't waste any time getting dressed following that pronouncement.

. . .

Callie stood rooted to the spot. She, Calliope Iphegenia Torres, one of the best orthopedic surgeons of her generation, stood still and just stared at the sight before her. Her mind tried to register the bloody and violently mangled version of the leg that laid on the hospital bed, tuning out the intern bringing her up to speed on the case. Upon closer inspection, she counted two complete femur fractures alongside three tibia fractures, the surrounding musculature and tissues twisted and contorted horribly. How in the hell was she supposed to put this back together?

"Ohh my god," Arizona exclaimed, looking pale with nausea as her eyes took in the same scene, "Is that really her?" Confused at the comment, the brunette's attention turned to the intubated patient, colorful purple and black bruises were blossoming across the face but the recognition was instant. It was Estie. Callie pulled back from the bed as if she'd been jolted by electricity, her heart racing.

"What happened?" The blonde demanded of the doctors bustling around the peds surgeon, swaying on her feet. "What the hell happened?!"

"We don't know," Chief Stanton replied, not taking his eyes off the patient, "Valorie brought her in 20 minutes ago. Torres, we're running out of time on that leg, what's your plan?"

"This leg is not looking good at all, Chief," The ortho surgeon replied, trying to get her bearings as she assessed the leg. "I see five separate fractures right now that we'll need to splint temporarily so I can get some scans and see what we're dealing with. Is she stable?"

"Enough," The well-muscled man answered gruffly, pulling up the bed rail on his side. "We'll splint on our way up, I'm not liking how that exposed tissue is looking. Let's go, people!" The fetal surgeon stepped back as the gurney slid past, still looking sick. Callie noticed her lost look and pulled her into a tight hug briefly.

"I'll do what I can," She promised, trying to offer what little comfort she could.

"Why just the left leg?" The blonde asked, voicing something that Callie hadn't realized was bothering her until her ex-wife voiced it. "And why so many times? Someone beat her up but who would be so vicious? Why just the left leg?" The fetal surgeon's questions echoed in the brunette's mind as she ran to catch up with the gurney in the elevator. What the hell had happened?!

"YOU!" The accusing scream startled the blonde, who turned from watching the elevator doors swing shut, looking for where it was coming from, "YOU DID THIS TO HER, YOU BASTARD!" Arizona rushed into the ER lobby, seeing Valorie Burton pushing Estie's father forcefully.

"Call the police, Mari," Arizona directed the head ER nurse, realizing that the plastics surgeon was right. The older woman hesitated, recognizing the couple from when Dr. Wren had given them a tour of the hospital.

"Now!" The blonde commanded, moving to confront the man as Mari pulled out her phone.

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about," The man deflected, growing agitated. "We were told our daughter was here-"

"CUT THE BULLSHIT!" Arizona thundered, her voice reaching a volume no one knew the petite blonde could produce, "Are you happy now?! You've beaten your daughter nearly to death. Is it enough that she may never walk again?"

"You!" Mr. Wren pointed threateningly, moving towards the fetal surgeon, "You defiled my daughter, I saw you kiss her in the parking lot. YOU seduced my baby and damned her to hell before I even laid a finger on her. All I did was God's will. He wanted to punish her by taking her leg just like he took yours. Haven't you learned anything from your sins?! Can't you see that it's an abomination?!" A wet splatter of spit hit Arizona's face without warning.

"SECURITY!" Mari yelled, rushing forward herself between the petite blonde and the thickly built man, "Sir, I'm on the phone with the police right now, they'll be here any minute so I suggest you compose yourself." The older woman's tone was venomous and Mr. Wren stepped back, cowed by her intensity and the two furious surgeons backing her up. Arizona's eyes burned into him as they made eye contact, hating him with everything she had. The man was utterly repulsive. Two security guards came and led the man aside, police sirens squealing and lights flashing in the background as officers arrived.

"You okay?" The kind older woman asked, turning around to face the fetal surgeon who had turned pale. "Sit down, I'll get you some water." Arizona nodded numbly, sinking into a chair as her mind raced. She had endured a lot of hate in her life, she'd grown up gay for god's sakes. But the fury that burned in his eyes, the way he looked at her as if she was the devil herself. The fact that her mere presence could invoke that kind of a reaction hurt more than she wanted to admit. Far more distressing than the man's misguided rage was the fact that he had done it because of her. She had been the inspiration for his twisted sense of justice. The graphically torn apart leg she'd seen was her fault. It was her fault. Panic began to well up inside, her chest feeling heavy and throat tight. Her breathing grew rapid and shallow, the whole room seeming to spin around her.

"Here you go honey," Mari had returned, handing her a water bottle but stopping when she noticed the fetal surgeon's distress. "Just take some deep breaths through your mouth, fill your diaphragm." The blonde followed her instructions, her breathing gradually returning to normal.

"Thank you," Arizona acknowledged gratefully, taking a sip of the water the other woman handed her. How could this happen? How had she slipped from a perfect warm paradise to this harsh and cold reality?

. . .

"What's happening?" Arizona said asked breathlessly, pushing open the scan room door now having donned purple scrubs.

"I've got Dr. Wren's scans here," The ortho surgeon answered, not turning away from them. "Come see for yourself." The blonde stepped up to the screen, taking in a breath. She had never seen anything like it, the femoral shaft was broken into three main pieces, the lower fracture splintering into five pieces as it met the knee cap. Below the knee were two clean horizontal breaks and one angled break. It was, as the orthopedic surgeon had stated earlier, not looking good at all.

"Okay," Arizona tried to wrap her mind around some way to fix it, "Why don't you put on an external fixator?"

"That will work on the lower leg, and possibly we could temporarily do that for the upper femoral fracture," Callie agreed, gesturing to various places on the scans, "But the real deal breaker is this shattered section. Not only is it shattered, but it's right at the joint, which further complicates things."

"So do the external fixator where you can while you figure out what to do about that part." The blonde suggested, turning towards the ortho surgeon.

"Because of the severity of the shattered bone," Callie began, "We won't be able to put enough screws in to stabilize all of the pieces as they heal. So it's not possible to fix it so it will be able to work with the knee joint again. I think amputation is her best option here. She'll be able to walk with a prosthesis."

"What if-" The blonde started again, staring at the scans in front of them in determination.

"Arizona, I just don't see a way for her to walk away with-" The ortho surgeon cut her off gently, trying to explain the severity of the situation.

"You had BETTER see her walking away from this with both legs Calliope Torres!" The blonde shouted, whipping around to face her ex-wife. "Her father beat her nearly to death and broke her bones in five different places because of me. Because of my injury that he thinks is the punishment of God for my being gay! If she never walks again it will be my fault. She will sit in that wheelchair or limp on that crutch and see me and hate me for the rest of my life because it will have been my fault. So yes, she will walk again because YOU are going to figure out how! You-" Arizona's voice faltered and her eyes filled with tears as she tried to keep her composure. "You have to. Calliope, please..." The anguish on the fetal surgeon's face pierced through the brunette.

"Okay, I will," She promised, crossing the distance between them and pulling the smaller woman close to her chest, stroking her blonde hair gently. "I will."

. . .

The little chapel was empty and dim, a few lit candles flickering to give off light. How am I here again? Callie wondered, looking up at the stained glass windows and feeling lost. I wished that she would be dead. I told Arizona I wouldn't care if she got hit by a truck. Why didn't I learn anything from what happened with Izzie? The orthopedic surgeon asked herself, desperately wanting answers. There wasn't going to be a miraculous recovery this time. The brunette had studied the scans for hours and no viable ideas had come out of it. A tear dropped onto Callie's clasped hands, causing her to let out a low chuckle as she realized she was crying. Am I really crying over that bitch? She was. I can't fix this. Hopelessness settled in as Callie leant back in the pew, wiping away the tears.

"What can I do, God?" The ortho surgeon asked, looking up at the large stained glass windows in anguish, "I hated her and wanted her to die but I never wanted her to actually die or get hurt." She looked down at her clenched hands, deciding to get down on her knees and actually pray. "Dear God, please help me here. I need your inspiration to fix this. This is my penance, please let me show you that I will change. I will be better, I promise. Just. Help me." The brunette sat back on the pew, feeling better but with no new inspiration. She sighed and pulled out the scans again, rubbing her eyes with fatigue as she hoped against hope that she would see something she hadn't before.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Heavy chapter, am I right? Mr. Wren has some major issues. I CANNOT BELIEVE he spat in Arizona's face! I would have taken him down then and there. Also, full disclosure here: I'm not Catholic so I'm not really sure how Callie would have actually reacted (I did a little research into the idea of penance but I'm still not entirely sure what it entails so I apologize if this was inaccurate) or expressed her beliefs but I drew on her reaction to Izzie's diagnosis for reference and wanted to show how her faith has evolved to handle bad situations. Tell me what you thought in the reviews and I'll update again as soon as I can! Thanks for following along, everyone :)