DECEMBER 14 SUNDAY

The fractures and third degree burns were gone. Doctor Pomfrey declared Sirius fit as a fiddle and he was discharged from the wing.

Now he was sitting at the foot of the statue of Lady Helga and her six badgers outside the patient treatment ward.

"Good morning," said Professor Sprout. "I'm going to have to take your roller skates."

He was still wearing his roller skates.

"What why?"

"Because disco has been proven to be extremely dangerous and therefore everything relating to disco is now forbidden."
Was she for real? Was it personal?

It wasn't. When Roy came out of the patient treatment ward, he was also asked to remove his roller skates.

"What why?" he asked, untying the shoelaces.

"It's a new rule," said Brussel Sprouts. "We had an emergency staff meeting this morning because of last night's events. Disco cause headlice and mass unconsciousness. It is not safe and it has to die."

Sirius untied his roller skates and handed them over.

"Now if you excuse me I must ask Doctor Pomfrey to confiscate everything disco related from the victims of last night's disco massacre," said Brussel Sprouts and went inside the patient treatment ward.

"Unbelievable!" said Roy. "I'm asking Flitters if it's true!"
He walked to the exit in fuschia socks.

Then Remus was discharged.

"Hey Moo guess what Brussel Sprouts was just here and-"

"Look Padfoot I'm sorry but I don't really have time to talk right now I have to go."

"At least tell me her name!"

"We can talk later, ok!"

And then he was gone from the wing.

Then James came out, as well as Peter.

"We are fit as fiddles," said James. "I see they took your roller skates, too."
An owl came flying down the wing and dropped a letter on Sirius's head. He opened it.

"Wow!"
"What?"

"You know I started this informal fashion house here, Loopy Designs. Nothing serious! But somebody on the outside has heard of us, somebody who wishes to be anonymous, and they need a new suit in time for Christmas Eve. They want it to be bright and festive and just communicate the spirit of the holiday and Christmas cheer."

"Maybe it's Father Christmas who is looking to turn a new leaf."
"I sure hope so!"

And about time, too.

X

The cast of A Christmas Carol were allowed to take a break. Sirius and Cas went outside to smoke and complain about the new anti-disco rules.

"It's Toady's fault," said Cas. "She can't get away with this. You won't let her."

"No. Wait, what?"

The remaining cast came outside as well because they sensed that the anti-disco rules were being complained about and they wanted to be part of it.

"Toady has to ruin everyone's fun!" said Roy. "But it's going to be her ruin! You will make sure of it!"

"Who are you referring to?" Sirius asked.

Why did people just ASSUME!
"What will you do!" asked Phil.

"You mean, what will WE do!" Sirius insisted.

"Um...yeah...fine...whatever..."
"I think we should fill buckets with toads and pour them over her head!" said Cas. "And then make Lady Bump our final number!"
Drew Dee, the director of the show and soon-to-be Hogwarts graduate, came out.

"Hey I said take five fags, not five packets! What's taking so long!"
Sirius could feel the pressure on him, because Cas was poking him in the back with her birch, unicorn mane.

"Drew," he said. "Can we, like, add some things to the show?"

"What sort of things?"

"Disco music. It's to protest against the new anti-disco rules."

"No. Use someone else's baby to protest. This is my musical and disco is for poofs."
"Uncool, Drew! I thought you were cool. My first day here, I thought, that chap, he's so cool. I want to be just like him. Now I'm not so sure I used the right person for a role model."
Drew inhaled some nicotine.

"Don't make people into heroes, they don't exist."

"Do they not exist or do they just fall?"

"What fanfic is that?"

"Scandalous Bohemians."

Reggie wrote some pretty great Warlock Gnomes fanfics for the school paper.

"We were just hoping you could sacrifice a small part of it, like the ending. I really believed you'd be willing to take part in our stance against the oppression. I'm sorry I was wrong."

"I'm sorry you were so stupid," said Drew. "I'm 17, I'm going to graduate next year, I'm the head of the Theatre Troupe. I have to be the mature one, or that's the end of me leading Titties. Sorry I can't really be your 'chum' in this matter."

The others bowed their heads in shame.

"I was going to let you take over after me after my graduation. But instead, I will let you take over after me now."

"What Drew no!" cried everyone.

"You gotta do what you gotta do. It's the only way you can make that statement or whatever."

"We don't have to make that statement!" said Sirius.

"I know you. You WILL use my show for your ends."
"I won't I promise!"
"Honestly it's fine. It doesn't make any difference. You've rehearsed the show, you know it by heart. You'll perform it according to my directions. You don't need me."

"We do need you!" cried everyone.

Drew silenced them with a hand.

"The time has come for me to pass on the torch. Now you can make all the statements you want. Of course I think you will probably have more respect for your own shows. Just be aware that if you use it for anything that violate the rules, that will be the end of you leading the Titties. Guys, this has nothing to do with you. I just want to spend my time on other things, like learning French, an instrument, smoking more weed."

He removed his sunglasses and dropped a fag butt. He looked out at the distance, the wind caught his hair and made it flow like a banner.

"God speed. Drew out."

Then he ran off.

"It's all my fault," said Sirius miserably.

"It's all our fault," said Cas. "We all want to bury Toady under a hill of toads! Isn't that right, guys?"

"Yeah!" said the rest of the cast.

Except for Mona Weed who thought that burying anyone under a hill of toads was mean.

"Can't it be a bucket of confetti and a huge diploma that says: World's Meanest Meanie?"

In a way, that was an even better idea, in the way, that it was a better idea.

"What do you think?" Cas asked Sirius. "Or are you afraid it will be the end of you leading the Titties?"

Sirius decided he didn't care if it meant the end of him leading the titties.