She awoke slowly, her head pounding and her body in a thin layer of exhaustion. Joel was asleep beside her and she shut her eyes again, trying to return to sleep. Ellie felt sick: her throat felt like someone was clawing it from the inside and her hands were sweaty. A fever had broken out on her head and she winced in pain from the sickness, letting out a small moan of pain. Ellie's voice was as dry as the sand of a scorching desert and she tried to get up, only for her body to reject it. Joel began to stir beside her but she couldn't hear him over the ringing of her own ears. Ellie pushed the pain down, sitting up and breathing heavily.
Finally, Joel awoke on the couch beside her and looked up, seeing her worse for wear. Her breathing was prolonged, and there was a wheezing after each exhale. Her skin was sweaty and she squeezed her eyes shut, her head ringing. "Ellie?" Joel asked, sitting up and meeting her eyes, cupping her jaw with his left hand. It was sweaty and there were temporary bags under her eyes. "Hey, Ellie?"
She looked to him, screwing her eyes closed again and then opening them, letting out a cough. "Hey, what's wrong?" Joel asked, pulling his sleeve up to his hand and wiping her sweat, only for more stress to replace it. "Ellie, hey." He shook her slightly and finally, her lips opened, with her eyes squeezing shut every now and then.
"I don't know, I… I don't feel good." She whispered hoarsely, weekly wiping her head and taking a deep breath. When she exhaled heavily, it felt like some separate entity in her was breathing, draining her own energy. "Fuck." Ellie whispered, hiding her head in her hands and letting out an airy cough, concealing it in her sleeves.
Joel swore under his breath and cupped her face with his hands, looking at her symptoms. "Shit, okay… stay here, alright? Let me heat you up somethin', then we can see what's wrong, baby girl." Ellie nodded, shivering and noticing that she could nearly see her own breath in front of her. A freezing layer of icy sweat surrounded her, and Joel stood quickly rushing towards the kitchen to heat Ellie something warm, to tame the itching of her throat.
"I'm f-freezing." Ellie chattered, rubbing her arms and trying to pile the couch's blankets on her, but Joel shook his head, moving back towards her and stripping the wool fabrics from her, giving her a pitiful look. "Joel-"
He pressed his hand against her forehead and swore under his breath, giving her a sad look and taking her jacket off of her, leaving her in a tank top. Her body shook in bitter cold and she reached for the blankets again but he sadly held them back. "I know, I know, baby girl, but we need to lower your fever, alright?" Ellie nodded shakily, rubbing her arms, still able to feel an icy layer surrounding her. He returned towards a kettle he'd set on the stove and she tried to stand as well, but quickly, her legs gave out and she fell to the floor, releasing a series of coughs. "Ellie!" He yelled, moving towards her quickly and taking her in his arms, pushing her top half into his arms while her bottom was laid out on his legs.
"M-my throat is killing me. I'm so tired…" Ellie whispered in Joel's amrs, still shivering. He cursed, a layer of terror surrounding him and confusion was etched into his features. The hell is this? What does she have, how'd she get sick so quickly? She was fine yesterday. "My head's p-pounding." She whispered, looking up at Joel weakly.
"I know, baby girl, just stay awake. I'm gon' get you to the hospital, alright?" He thought of the hospital they'd visited after the fire Dina and Ellie had been swarmed by, praying they'd be able to help her somehow. Normally, when Sarah got sick, he'd just give her a glass of juice and a hug, letting her stay home for the day. But in the world they lived in, the common cold could kill you. An infection could be ten times more deadly, and this absolutely terrified Joel. "Did you eat somethin' bad?"
"No, I… I don't think so." Ellie whispered as Joel scooped her into his arms, his hands under her knees and on her neck. "Agh, my… fuck, my head's fucking killing me." Ellie swore and Joel frowned, kissing the top of her forehead.
"Okay, just stay awake, baby girl." He ordered her softly and she nodded. He slipped her shoes onto her feet and did the same for himself, soon escaping the house and quickly moving towards the 'hospital' building, terror lacing around his limbs while Ellie coughed in his arms, her sweaty body weighing them down. "Tell me what's hurting, baby."
"My throat… my throat fucking hurts." Ellie responded quietly, letting out another cough. "It's fucking freezing." She murmured, shivering and making Joel frown more. Stress was etched into the wrinkles in his skin and he shook her slightly, seeing exhaustion dawn on her face. "I… I don't know, I felt fine yesterday." Ellie whispered, trying to theorize what was wrong with her.
"Okay, don't worry, baby girl. Them doctors'll be able to help you, Ellie." She nodded, her stretched out breaths making him feel physical pain. Confusion was surrounding him and he began making a mental checklist, crossing off whatever was irrational. She was okay yesterday… what happened?
"Fuck, I haven't felt like… like this since I was bitten." Ellie whispered, not really meaning anything by it. But, when she saw the look of horror on his face, she instantly wished she could take those words back and shove them into her mouth. He chewed the inside of his mouth, squeezing his eyes shut and only quickening his pace. No… what if her immunity stopped workin'? What if she's dying…? No, no, no. No, that ain't true. She's gon' be fine. "I… I'm sure it's nothing." She muttered, but the sentence had done its damage.
Ellie let out another series of coughs and Joel frowned, checking her fever again obsessively almost as if it had changed in the last few minutes, praying it had. "Okay, just stay right here, baby girl." He whispered and she nodded, seeing they'd finally made it to the hospital. He tore the door open, keeping Ellie in his arms with a protection hanging over her, coming from him. His eyes focused on a woman behind a sort of receptionist desk and the woman saw Ellie's barely conscious body in his arms. Her breath hitched, and Joel rushed towards her. "Please, my daughter's sick." He begged and the woman nodded, standing and disappearing into a door behind her. Joel looked down to her, pulling a sweaty strand of hair behind her ear. "It's okay, baby." He promised her, humming gently and trying to comfort her.
She almost smiled at how he'd addressed her and a small bit of relief ran through her when she realized that Joel truly believed she was his daughter, something she'd thought herself. Suddenly, a new woman dressed in blue scrubs and a surgical mask stepped from outside the door the other girl had disappeared into, and Joel's head snapped up towards her. "My daughter, something's wrong."
The doctor nodded and pressed her hand against Ellie's head, frowning. "Alright, don't worry. Most of these scenarios it's just a stomach bug. I'll take a look." Joel hated the feeling of Ellie being taken from his arms and he watched her be traded into the woman's arms. Ellie looked up, feeling Joel's absence.
"Wait… Joel…" She began to whisper but he gently hushed her, looking at her as the woman took her from him.
"Sh, they're gonna help you." He whispered, taking in the sight of her before eventually the doctor began to take her down the hall towards the patients' rooms. "It's gonna be okay." He whispered, but the doctor and his daughter had already disappeared into a door, hopefully to be seen again. Joel breathed heavily, not wanting to leave the building. He knew Ellie must've been scared, she looked so uncomfortable when he handed her over to the doctor. He cringed, banging his fist against the wall but regaining himself. He swore under his breath, knowing he should probably go to Tommy.
When they first got to Jackson, he allowed Tommy to tell one of the doctors Ellie's condition, and he recognized the woman who'd taken her as that doctor. He couldn't remember her name, it was something with a 'd.' Of course, he disliked anyone knowing Ellie's condition, as that truth always came with a second of endangerment, but if it would keep her healthy, it was worth it.
What's wrong with her? Did I do somethin'? Did she eat something? She said… she said it felt like she was Infected. What if all of this was for nothing, what if she's Infected? Joel wanted to die thinking that and he shook the negative thoughts from him, begging his mind to stop. No, she has to be alright. She has to be. He decided he should fill in Tommy and regrettably, opted to leave the hospital to fill in his brother. Maybe he knows somethin'... Joel foolishly hoped, knowing there wasn't really anything his brother could really do to help.
As he was on his way to Tommy's, he suddenly barged into someone and he fell to the floor, a small grunt escaping his mouth. "Shit, sorry! I wasn't looking where I was going." A female voice met his ears and he saw Faye, the guard who he'd grown a subtle friendship with. "Oh, it's you." She smiled, presenting her hand. He took it and she heaved the man up with great strength, giving him a smile. "Are you okay?" She asked, seeing Joel's distraught expression. He shook his head, looking back towards the hospital.
"No, my daughter, she's sick." Joel croaked, and the woman nodded, a fake look of sympathy on her face.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sure everything will be alright." Joel found her voice almost soothing and he nodded, feeling a small bit of ease in his tense body. But then, he imagined Ellie in that hospital, having strangers ask her uncomfortable questions and doctors treat her like some test subject. "You're from the Boston QZ, right?"
Joel nodded, clearly somewhat distracted by the seemingly terrifying morning. Everything was normal yesterday, and now, yet again, one of their lives were at risk, while the other mourned. "That's a far way, must've been tough." Part of the tone she'd said that in was unsettling, but once again, Joel shrugged it off.
"Yeah, suppose that's the world now, though… where were you, before the outbreak?" Joel asked, regaining himself and dusting the dirt from his shirt off. He looked up, meeting the woman's seemingly kind eyes. They began to strike a conversation, and she even got him to laugh once, despite the hectic dawn.
"I was in Cali." She answered, and Joel widened his eyes, knowing that was nearly across the country. As the minutes went by, they got friendlier and friendlier, and Joel almost felt his cheeks blush at one point. Still, part of him was still in the hospital, with Ellie's limp body in his arms. But just a small part of him was in the conversation, his cheeks red and despite his protests, his heart beat quickening.
'' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' ''
Where's Joel…? My body feels like it's on fire… where is he? Where am I? It felt like she was moving in slow motion. Ellie looked around, seeing a woman looking back at her. She recognized it as one of the doctors, and remembered Joel telling her how Tommy had informed the woman about her condition. A small bit of mistrust lived in Ellie, but she didn't really trust anyone, not after Winter. Everything feels like it's on fire… I'm so tired. "Okay, sweetie. Can you tell me your symptoms?"
Ellie was outfitted in a hospital dress and she looked down at her sweaty skin, then back up to the woman. She was so tired, and she just wanted to sleep. "Um, my… my throat hurts." Ellie rasped out, picking at her nails anxiously. She wanted the presence of Joel and his tight hugs… she wanted him to tell her he loved her again, because it felt as if she was dying. "And it feels like I can't… can't breathe right. Like I'm drowning."
The doctor nodded, scribbling something down on her notepad and slowly getting up, moving towards Ellie on the examination table. "Alright… is it okay if I do some tests on you? It won't hurt, they're just to help me find out what's wrong, sweetie." Ellie shyly nodded, feeling self conscious as the woman rolled down the right side of her shirt, to get to Ellie's arm. "Okay, this will tell me your blood pressure, alright?"
Ellie wasn't really listening, her blood was pounding in her ears and it felt like she was going to combust. Another cough escaped Ellie's lips and she looked down to see the woman wrapping some sort of band around her arm. The woman pressed a button, and the band began to tighten around her arm, almost hurting. Ellie's breath hitched, but she heard the woman try to comfort her. I want Joel. Ellie thought sadly, wondering if her father was right down the hall, waiting at the hospital's entrance, worrying.
"Are… are you going to give me a s-shot?" Ellie asked, remembering when she'd been given shots back in Boston. They'd been forced to be vaccinated back in the school, and that was when Ellie discovered her fear of needles. Her body still felt freezing, but the doctor had only made her colder by stripping her down to her undergarments and fitting her in a hospital dress.
"No, I just need to see some of your bodily symptoms. Your uncle told me about your… situation." Ellie realized she was talking about Tommy, and she smiled for a minute, thinking of the younger Miller as her uncle. She liked Tommy: he was just like Joel, just a big sap hidden under thick skin. And it seemed like he cared about her as well, which made her feel comfort, having someone that loved her other than Joel. "I think I know what's wrong." The doctor whispered, trying to comfort her. As the doctor performed her tests, Ellie just grew more and more tired, and her stomach growled. She hadn't ever been apart from Joel when she wasn't feeling good, and she missed his hugs and his terms of comfort.
Finally, they were done. The doctor had left, telling the small girl she was going to search for her father. Ellie nodded, getting a small burst of relief at the mention of Joel. She felt terrible, and though psychologically she was actually feeling better than she'd really ever been before, her physical sickness was bringing her down. Finally, the door opened. Ellie's head snapped up and she saw Joel's face. "Joel." She whispered and she felt him quickly wrap his hands around her, not wanting her to stand.
"It's me." He assured her, sitting beside her on the examination table and letting her hide in his arms, her body still feeling horrible. "It's okay, we can go back home soon, okay?" She nodded her head, hiding in his arms and letting out another cough. He cringed, rubbing her back and looking up to the door, seeing the doctor had returned. "Tell me you have an explanation for this." He begged her, not caring how weak ro childish he sounded.
The doctor shut the door, turning around and looking at the small family. She frowned, sitting at a desk that lived in the medium-sized room, knitting her hands together and sighing. "Yes… Ellie's immunity… it's putting a burden on her body. Her blood pressure is much higher than it should be."
"What does that mean?" Joel asked, looking from the doctor, then back down to Ellie with a terrified expression. She wasn't exactly paying attention, just concealing herself in Joel's arms and letting out small coughs every now and then.
"To sum it up, her immune system is exhausted. Having to fight off Infection is making her body have to work much more than, say, you or me." The doctor began speaking, looking down at her notes then back up to Ellie with pity in her eyes. Joel felt his blood roaring in his ears and his heart rate grew. His world focused on the doctor's words, knowing it'd decide both his and Ellie's futures. "To be frank, the reason she's sick is because her immune system is tired. It's not able to keep up with Cordyceps and regular sicknesses."
"And what does that mean?" Joel asked, his voice quieter and more hoarse this time. He took Ellie's hand in his, squeezing it and kissing the top of her head, whispering comfort in her ear and tickling her back. He was trying to comfort her, but her exhausted body prevented it and she just hid her face in his chest.
"Her body isn't able to hold as much energy as, say, you or me. Her metabolic rate is, honestly, way higher than anything I've seen… maybe ever. That's why you're not growing, and that's why you're so tired right now. The virus is too hard on your immune system, and it's taking away your energy. The problem with that is… you're young, and your body can tolerate this, say, overtime it's having to work. But as you get older… it's going to get harder for your body to keep up. So…"
"I'm a goner?" Ellie finished her sentence, looking up towards the doctor and letting another cough out. Joel cringed, petting Ellie's hair, and shaking his head.
"Hey, no. You're going to be fine… right?" He looked up to the doctor again, feeling as if he wasn't able to breathe. The woman sighed and looked down, then back up to Ellie. Ellie buried her head in Joel's chest again, coughing once again. Joel stroked her back, trying to comfort her. "Right?"
"You're going to be okay, but you're going to have to work a little harder to be able to do the same things. You're going to run out of energy quicker, so, you need to make sure she eats at least twice a day. I can prescribe you some things to help you get over this sickness, but you need to be more careful. Getting sick is much riskier, since your immune system is weaker than, say, mine, or your dad's." Ellie looked in the woman's eyes and coughed again, covering her lips with her hands.
"Okay…" Ellie whispered, looking at the doctor before once again, burying herself in Joel's shoulder.
"You should be able to recover in a few days, but you need to take it a little easier from now on. After years of malnutrition, your body's weaker, and can't handle long hikes and as much activity without eating often." Joel nodded, still not able to get that first sentence out of his head: "As you get older, it's going to be harder for your body to keep up." He cringed at those words and squeezed his eyes shut, wanting desperately for Ellie to be able to live longer. The doctor hypothesized she'd make it into her late thirties or forties, and that made Joel want to die, because he knew there was a fairly medium sized chance he'd still be around. He'd be a dinosaur, but he'd still be alive to see Ellie die before him. "I'm sorry to dump all of this bad news on you."
The doctor sighed, standing and handing Joel a small bag. He nodded, murmuring a 'thank you,' but his focus was on the depressed expression on his daughter's face. "These will help keep you energized, and they'll give your immune system a little more punch. I recommend coming for a little check up every few months, just to make sure nothing's changed." To make sure I'm not dying. Ellie thought, knowing it was what the doctor would say if she wasn't a child. No wonder I was so tired when we were on the road… I thought I was just broken. I guess I am.
"Thank you." Joel dipped his head in gratitude and watched as the doctor sadly left the room, leaving Ellie and Joel alone. He sighed, looking down to Ellie and petting her hair, seeing she hadn't surfaced from his chest.
"Am I broken?" She asked Joel, and he cringed, squeezing his features together and shaking his head, tightening his grip around Ellie. He wished so much that he could take all of this from her shoulders and place it onto him.
"No, baby girl. You're perfect, alright?" He asked, but she just remained silent. He frowned, taking both of his hands and cupping her face, looking straight into her eyes. "Do you hear me…? You are the most amazing thing in the world." She nodded, but hid her face back in his chest, coughing again. Joel felt mental cuts being skewered across his skin with her sadness and silence. He sighed, rubbing her back and looking down at her.
"Can we go home…? I don't feel good." He nodded, making sure she saw him kiss the top of her head lovingly. She subtly smiled and took his hand, squeezing it. "I love you, Dad." She whispered and he felt his heart break, tickling her back once again. He heard another series of coughs and he sighed, whispering comfort in her ear.
"I love you, too, baby girl. Let's get you home." She took a shaky exhale, letting him scoop her up and hold her so that her head peeked right above his shoulder, and her legs were curled around his waist. He held her by her waist, and his left hand held her back gently. "Y'know, when Sarah got sick, we always stayed home together, just watched those cheesy teen movies she loved so much."
"Can we?" Ellie smiled softly up at him and he let out a chuckle, nodding. "I wanna see what all the fuss is about… anything but another horror movie." Ellie spoke softly, almost as if a loud volume would hurt her ears, which it did, considering she still had a massive headache.
"I think Sarah woulda loved you, kiddo." He told her, feeling her nestle her head into the top of his shoulder. "I remember the first time we went horse-riding together… she was a natural. She loved it."
"And you?" Ellie asked, her voice muffled in his shirt. A sheepish smirk spread across his lips and he let out a chuckle, shaking his head. "Well?" She smiled, taking her head away from his shoulder and looking into his eyes, amusement riddled in the emerald glints.
"I got bucked off… sprained my ankle." She let out a small giggle and cackled evilly. He faked a glare at her, but he couldn't help the small smirk that spread across his lips. He was thankful to hear her laugh, especially after the horrible news that the doctor had given them. They'd just have to be more careful now: carry around food for Ellie to eat, and make sure she got more sleep. "Oh, sh…" He teased, looking back down at her. "So, how'd your first time go?"
"Back in the zone, this soldier snuck me out. Winston. We smuggled a horse from the military, and… I fell, and…" She let her last word drag on and a snort escaped her mouth when she thought back to the memory. She laughed a small bit, but it was interrupted by her coughing. He smirked at her smile, but it disappeared when her coughs emerged. "And, I broke my collarbone." She laughed, remembering the fall she'd taken, and how Winston had rushed to her, his older brother persona taking over. But of course, just like everything else, his time ended, and so did Riley's, and Tess', and Sam and Henry's…
"And you were makin' fun of me?" Joel smirked, letting out an airy laugh. She playfully slapped his arm, glaring up at him. "I'm never gon' let you live that down."
"Yeah, I bet, old man. At least it kept me out of fights for a few weeks." Ellie shrugged, remembering the gladiator style fights the school had made them do to prepare them for the military. Joel frowned, kissing the top of her forehead and swearing at the thought of her having to get into fights to get by. She still had a tiny bruise on her cheek from the bloater attack and Joel brushed it with his thumb, kissing her cheek in paternal love. "You're such a sap." She giggled, gently pushing him off and smiling up at him.
Finally, they made it back to the house, and Joel opened the door, once again laying her down on the couch with extreme care. "Alright, let me get you this medicine." Ellie sighed, thinking back to what the doctor had told them.
"Are you worried? About what she said… when I'm older?" She asked him, looking at him in the kitchen. His movement stalled, and that answered her question. She sighed, turning around on the couch and reaching for the remote. Ellie turned the television on, trying to distract herself with the cartoons. One of the mice that danced across the screen had a thick southern accent and she smiled, thinking it sounded like Joel.
"No, I'm not. Do you know why?" Joel asked her, returning to her with a glass of milk and the medicine that the doctor had given her. He met her eyes and their gazes connected, remaining like that for almost thirty seconds. "Because you're the strongest person I know. You're so much stronger than me. So, no, I ain't scared, because I know we're gonna be just fine." Ellie felt herself ease slightly at that answer and she suddenly hid in Joel's arms, letting him wrap his arms around her as they sat. "Do you believe me?"
"Always." She responded, and he smiled at that. "Okay… what is all this shit?" She asked, picking up the two pills and the glass of milk. Joel smiled softly, remembering the medicine that the doctor had told him about prior to bringing him in the same room as Ellie.
"It's…" He squinted, trying to remember the names of the pills. "This gives you some more energy, and this helps your metabolism: let's you go a bit longer without restin'." Ellie nodded, taking a gulp of the milk and then placing the pills into her mouth, swallowing them.
"Yuck." She winced at the disgusting taste, scrunching her features together. He gave her a somber smile, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. It became silent and she looked to the TV again, the character's southern accent being illuminated once again. She giggled, looking to Joel. "He sounds like you."
She still felt terrible. Her exhaustion was slowly draining her down and her cough hadn't retreated. Ellie let out another series of hacks out, hiding them in her elbow. Joel frowned, brushing her cheek with his thumb. "I know… doctors said cough'll get better in a few days." She nodded, recovering and taking a subtle inhale, her lungs asking her for air.
"God, it's still fucking freezing." Ellie whispered, remembering the hospital gown she was dressed in. Joel frowned, but didn't permit her any blankets. They needed to lower her fever, and though the sweat had slightly retreated, she was still on fire.
"I know, but we gotta get that fever down. You're burning hot." Joel murmured, pressing his palm against her temple once again. Ellie leaned into his grip, shutting her eyes and letting herself calm for a moment. "I promise, you'll feel better soon."
"Okay… I believe you." She answered, looking back to the television with still slightly labored breathing. Joel watched her, thinking over what the doctor had told them. She might not live as long… That was what the doctor had said. And that thought alone made him want to die. "Hey, Joel… I'm hungry." Ellie whispered, looking to him with a sad expression. He nodded, getting up immediately and heading towards the kitchen.
"Okay, kiddo. Listen, about all of this…" He started, looking in her eyes from the new distance. "We do this together, alright? We do this together." Ellie nodded, not wanting to be alone. She felt almost broken because of what the doctor lady had told her, and she shut her eyes sadly, feeling like damaged goods. It was the same feeling she'd had after Winter, and it was beginning to resurface.
"Okay, Joel." The hours passed by, and Ellie slipped in and out of sleep. It'd begun to darken, and Ellie sat in Joel's arms, sleep beginning to take over her. Coughs still burst through her body occasionally, and Joel had given her a little bit of the syrup the doctor had prescribed. "Can I still go on patrols?" They'd been conversing on how things would change, and she had a million questions.
"Yeah, we'll just have to take it easier, alright. You need to start bringing food to the ranch. I don't want you passin' out on me." He said softly, brushing her hair for her while she laid in his arms. Ellie nodded, squeezing Joel's hand that she'd taken hostage in her grip.
"Okay… I, um… I have a surprise for you." Ellie spoke nervously, slowly standing with Joel's help. "I'll be right back." He watched her slowly hobble up the steps towards her room, carefully coming downstairs with the guitar Joel had crafted her nearly a week and a half ago. A wicked grin spread on his lips and she returned to the couch, holding the instrument in her hands. "I, um… this is my first singing, so… don't laugh." He nodded, smirking with a paternal love in his eyes. She sighed, looking down to the strings and awkwardly positioning her hands in the needed positions, looking down self consciously. "Okay… here goes."
"That's life: that's what all the people say. You're riding high in April, shot down in May." She started, moving her hands on the strings and singing as well as she could, clearly not believing she was doing a good job. But Joel's smile warmed her a little bit and she loosened her grip on the guitar, relaxing a small bit. "But, I know, I'm gonna change that tune… when I'm back on top, back on top in June."
Joel remembered this song: Sarah's mother had loved it, and he remembered her dancing around their house with Sarah in her arms, a grand smile on her perfect lips. Ellie had converted it into a slower song, and the meaning behind someone else's words became her own, and she looked up to Joel, then back down to the strings.
"I said, that's life. And as funny as it may seem… some people get their kicks, stomping on a dream. But I don't let it let it get me down. 'Cause this fine old world keeps spinning around." Her smile was visible in her singing, and he could hear the subtle happiness in her words. His grin was beaming as he watched his daughter shuffle her fingers on the guitar, still new to the instrument. Though, she treated the talent as an expert would, and he felt pride burning through his chest.
Her voice was subtly hoarse, due to her illness, but Joel still believed it sounded perfect as could be. Everything about her was perfect. "I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, a poet… a pawn and a king. I've been up and down and over and out… and I know one thing. Each time I find myself flat on my face, I pick myself up and get up and get back in the race. That's life." She sung, her voice polytone and slightly hushed because of her sickness.
Joel patiently listened to the song, closing his eyes and just listening to her voice. And all of the terror and fear that'd been living in him that day eroded, because when he listened to her voice, he knew things were going to end up okay, and he had the same effect on her.
"I tell you, I can't deny it. I thought of quitting, but my heart just ain't gonna buy it. And if I didn't think it was worth one single child, I'd jump right on a big bird, and then I'd fly." Ellie's fingers were new with the strings, but playing in front of Joel almost gave her a confidence she didn't previously have. So, as she continued playing, her arms loosened and the tone slowly improved more and more.
"I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, a poet… a pawn and a king. I've been up and down and over and out… and I know one thing. Each time I find myself playin' flat on my face, I just pick myself up and get back in the race. That's life, that's life and I can't deny it. Many times, I'd thought of cutting out, but my heart wouldn't buy it." Her voice grew slightly louder, but she detoured it down again, as she felt a series of coughs coming that she narrowly prevented. The end of the song approached, and she poured her energy into the wooden guitar.
She still had yet to design it, but the decal had already been decided, and was sketched on the guitar in chalk. It was the beautiful curl of a bundle of vines that descended down into blossoms at the bottom. Fresh pain was on the guitar from where she had started painting the flowers, but the leaves were left in traces of the white chalk.
"But if there's nothing shaking coming this here July, I'm gonna roll myself up in a big ball and die." Ellie trailed off the last word, almost smiling at the new morbid meaning it had after the day's events. "My, my." Ellie finished, her fingers finding a new home on the strings. A moment of silence passed over her and she looked up to Joel, seeing the immeasurable smile on his face. "Well… that was it." She smiled sheepishly, surprised as Joel suddenly took her in his arms, squeezing her tightly. She let out a shy giggled, wrapping her arms around him as well.
"That was amazing, kiddo." He whispered, pride swelling in his heart. Ellie smiled, placing the guitar on the coffee table and swinging both of her arms around Joel, feeling truly happy again. He pulled away from her when she let out another series of coughs and he frowned, checking her fever. It had lowered significantly, and finally, he allowed her a blanket that he spread over both of them.
"I try." She whispered jokingly, and Joel let out a chuckle, taking her in his arms again and letting her slowly begin to drift to sleep in his grip. "I'm super tired." She whispered, forgetting the performance when she felt Joel's soft grip surround her, making her more tired.
"I know, baby girl… try and get some sleep, alright?" Ellie nodded, yawning and sighing, quickly drifting off in Joel's arms. Joel looked down to her, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. You're perfect… and we'll figure this out together.