Merlin panicked, as he waited there, in front of the alter, hands interlocked with Arthur's. It accrued to him, and he really didn't know how he hadn't thought about this before, but it just hit him now, as the woman in the blue dress, currently ruining his life, was looking for the wedding vows page in this very large, very old and dirty looking book. It hit Merlin that he had never kissed Arthur before, with good reason...he'd much rather leave that rubbish to Gwen. But what happens at the end of every wedding ceremony? You may now do what to the bride or groom? KISS!
This would be their first kiss, literally as they got married, in front of Merlin's whole family. Apart from the fact that he had no interest in kissing Arthur, he understood several things all at once, as the woman yelled out, "DAMMIT, WHERE IS IT?" and angrily bashed through pages of the book, without much regard for them or the book. Merlin realized he didn't want to kiss Arthur and Arthur didn't want to kiss him. Just judging by the heavy breathing Arthur was doing, and the sweat forming on the man's forehead. Merlin realized Arthur had never kissed a man before, he didn't know what it was like, and Merlin...although a very proud gay, was not going to be a very great first time, as he was about to throw chunks all over the nasty, reddish-brown carpet they stood on. "Finally..." blue dress woman companied, and looked up at the two from under her half-rimmed glasses. "Ready?"
They both nodded, the woman cleared her throat and Merlin could hear his mother crying from somewhere in the room. This was going to be a disaster, Merlin could already feel it. The whole wedding, the whole marriage...one big fuck up.
"We are gathered here to bring together a union of two people, a union brought on to us by love and commitment," said the woman in the blue dress, in a much clearer and nicer voice than she had spoken with before. "Marriage, a celebration of a sacred bond, of two soul's finding each other. We are gathered here today, in front of the court, in front of your friends and family, to join you both together in this holiest of alliance." She sniffed and turned to look at Arthur. "Do you, Arthur, promise to love, honor, cherish and protect Merlin, forsaking all others and holding onto only him?"
Arthur looked confused for a long, long time before he nodded his head and muttered. "Yes..."
The blue dress woman glared at him, for taking so long and then proceeded, with a snap. "And do you take Merlin to be your husband?"
"I do," said Arthur.
"Good...and do you, Merlin, promise to love, honor, cherish and protect Arthur, forsaking all others and holding onto only him?"
Merlin took in a sharp breath, eyes drifting from his family. His mother still cried, his father looked stone-faced, Elyan looked like he wanted to be somewhere else and Gwen was glaring at Merlin, nodding her head as slowly and unnoticeable as possible. He let out the breath and whispered. "Yeah..."
"Do you take Arthur to be your husband?"
"I do," answered Merlin and the woman nodded, turning the page of the book at a gulling and not very caring speed. They heard paper sounds in the silent room, like it might be ripping.
"Let us move on to the rings...?" said the woman, looking around at the faces watching her with bored interest. Gwen rushed forward then and opened her purse, she fished around inside for several very long seconds before she pulled a ring box out of the bottom of her purse. She handed it to Arthur and then walked away. Merlin watched him as he opened the box and pulled out the rings. He handed the one meant for Arthur to Merlin and he kept the one meant for Merlin. All the while the woman didn't pay no mind to this, she just kept looking over the book, as if it said something new this time. "At last..." she did say, in a tired tone, and then carried on. "I would like you to each place the wedding bands on your fingers and repeat after me; With this ring, I thee faithfully wed."
The faithfully bit really threw Merlin, as Arthur went first, said these words and slipped the ring that had been fitted for Merlin onto his left ring finger. There would be no faithfulness in this marriage. The whole thing was a sham, but Merlin tried not to think on it too much. It was his turn now, he said the stupid words and shoved the ring onto Arthur's finger, and they were still holding hands when blue dress woman spoke again.
"I now pronounce you married," she said, as if she had just told them the sky was blue and she was already walking away as she finished speaking. "You may kiss..."
This was the part Merlin hadn't been looking forward to at all. As blue dress woman walked off, Arthur just stared at Merlin for awhile, looking perplexed and alarmed, and Merlin realized he wasn't going to be moving in first. So, Merlin stepped forward and closed the space between them. They're noses bumped as Merlin rushed in, entirely too fast and already wanting it to be over. It was strange and awkward. Awkward to be having a first kiss with someone in front of your entire family, and even more awkward to be having a first kiss with your now husband in front of their girlfriend...who was also your sister.
Arthur didn't kiss back at first either. Not that there was much to kiss back to. It was mostly just four...or more like two and a half lips mashed together for a few seconds. But Arthur did press back into it, for about a half a second before pulling away entirely. And once he did, it was over, it was all over. They were now officially married and everything Merlin had been dreading was staring him dead in the face. Merlin's family was also staring them in the face, rushing forward and grabbing them, snapping pictures and all around looking rather uncomfortable about the whole thing, but pretending not to be. Hunith had still not stopped crying...
Once they got a framed copy of their marriage certificate, which was really just kind of gross and definitely not wanted, it was time to leave. The whole thing had taken about an hour. Merlin's whole life was ruined in an hour, he supposed other's lives had been ruined in less time, but it still stung a little. Even though Merlin and Arthur had arrived separately, they were now to leave together. Not to go anywhere else but to Merlin's family home, where they were having a wedding reception. For close family and friends, of course. Merlin wasn't looking forward to it at all. He just wanted to drink too much and go to sleep.
The car ride was quiet, they hadn't really spoken to each other. Other than the basic how are you's and good, how was your day? conversations since Merlin had moved into Arthur's house, they didn't have much conversation. And Gwen just always seemed to be around, so why did Arthur need to talk to Merlin when she was around anyway? Short answer, he didn't. Merlin assumed nothing would change now either. He would just be the third-wheel in his own marriage.
"I'm sorry," said Arthur, as he made the wrong right as they drove and had to make an extra left to get back on track. That wasn't why he was sorry though, Merlin didn't say anything either way. "Well...fuck, I'm sorry about a lot of things, but I mean about the kiss.. I just freaked out. Not that there's anything wrong with you, I just never kissed another man before. I didn't know what it would be like. I should have kissed you better...it was rubbish."
"There's a first time for everything," said Merlin, and although he was trying to make his voice sound light, he just sounded kind of depressed. As Arthur pulled onto Merlin's old street, he looked over at him with some form of worry. "I've never been married before, so I guess we're even."
"I've never been before either," said Arthur. "So I was double fucked back there."
"Guess it's a good thing you won't be triple fucked then," Merlin said, with a smirk and a wink and Arthur nearly ran into a car that was parked on the side of the road. He swore and yanked the wheel, the car swerved into the middle of the lane and Merlin had to laugh a little at this. "I was kidding..."
"Oh, so I will be triple fucked?" offered Arthur, a smooth recovery, Merlin had to admit. And he shrugged.
"I don't know...ask Gwen."
Arthur shook his head and let out a breath. "Bugger off..." Merlin didn't say anything and waited for Arthur to stop the car so he could get out. Arthur parked, but grabbed Merlin's arm, so he couldn't get out. Merlin looked back with a raised eyebrow. "I was trying to talk to you about something important."
"You should know now...since we're married, I don't like talking about important things." said Merlin, casually. This may or may not be true, but mostly Merlin just wanted to get out of the car and out of this conversation, so maybe it was true. "Important conversations give me hives..."
"Look, I am just trying to say I am sorry you were forced into this, but I am grateful...I know you're not doing it for me," said Arthur and Merlin sighed, shaking his head no. "but even so-"
"It's fine, let's just please not talk about it right now...my family are going to wonder what we're doing."
"What they must think of me..." said Arthur then, not giving it a rest. "When I arrived with Gwen, they're faces, as if I were Satan himself."
"They probably looked at you like that because you wore a red tie on white...I mean really, is this Christmas?"
"Can you be serious?"
"No, not right now...my nerves are shot, I am fairly sure I just ruined my life, and I'm hungry and hungover...and I want to be more hungover tomorrow. So please, for the love of God...shut up, Arthur!"
Arthur stared at Merlin for a long moment and then let go of his arm. "Fine, alright...let's go."
(A/N: Sooo...they're married now! I tried to make it as not romantic as I possibly could. Which I think I did great on, as it wasn't at all. From Merlin's feelings right down to the blue dress woman who didn't give a shit. I also didn't want the kiss to be like that 'Magic Moment' kiss, like...why should this kiss actually mean anything? Neither of them really want to get married, they aren't in love with each other. Why would it be nice? Nah, that might happen later on...after A LOT of learning each other. I hope you all enjoyed this. Two chapters left! I'm excited.)