Upstead (First Kiss)

Chapter 12

Hello guys! I am back with yet another chapter. And I can tell you this chapter is going to have a lot interesting things in it. Various things happen and I am happy with the outcome. Please give me feedback and I do hope you enjoy. :)

Their kiss had ended rather quickly and both of them were seated side by side with a slight awkwardness in the atmosphere. As much as Jay wanted to experience these moments with Hailey he had to give her the time she needed and most importantly be there for her. If her reactions were so sharp and blunt there must be a solid reason behind them and he had to respect it and slowly make her overcome her fears. Hailey got up in a moment deciding it was time to leave. Jay suggested, "Why don't you stay here? It's pretty late."

Hailey hesitated for a moment but made up her mind finally, "It's better if I leave Jay. Also Vanessa has come back and she'll be worried."

Jay nodded, understanding she made sense and offered, "Then let me at least drop you."

Hailey agreed to that and they were off. The ride to Hailey's place was quiet and peaceful. None of that had anything in particular to talk about, but the tension that had been there earlier was no longer present. As they arrived Jay grabbed her hand before she got out and assured her softly, "I will be there every step of the way."

Hailey smiled and got out waving him a goodbye. He waited till she was safely inside and headed back to his place. Hailey really had a hold on his heart that no one had ever had before and he was willing to do anything to make her feel the same way.

As Hailey entered the living room she saw Vanessa sitting on the couch and reading something. At her arrival Vanessa quickly shut her book and looked at Hailey. The time had come for them to have their talk. Vanessa had heard about Hailey's incident but after tonight she had more questions. She was pretty sure Hailey had just come from Jay's place and she fully intended to know what was going on there as well. Hailey got a bottle of wine and poured two glasses and took a seat next to Vanessa on the couch. She felt comfortable and she was glad that her friend was back and was willing to listen to all her problems. As much as she liked Burgess, she couldn't share everything because they didn't live together and Burgess was going through some of her own problems regarding Adam. Both friends sipped the wine and Hailey began with Booth's attack, hoping that with this recounting she would be able to let go of it once and for all. Vanessa was listening intently and was clearly disgusted and horrified by the events. Her anger was evident and she was more than glad to hear that Voight had shot Booth ultimately. As the story came to an end Hailey let out a loud sigh, still not being able to forget everything. After long moments of silence Vanessa finally asked, "So what's going on between you and Halstead? I saw some tension in the bull pen today and I know for sure that you were at his place until now."

Hailey had to give it to her friend for being so observant and alert. She hadn't even been around but she had sensed that something was going on. Remembering exactly when all this had started a smile couldn't help but form itself on her lips. At that point there were no worries and no attacks to think about. She began finally telling Vanessa about their first kiss in the bull pen and earning a broad smile from Vanessa. Then the attack had shaken up the unit and Jay had insisted on helping Hailey out. She recounted almost everything, leaving only too personal things out. Vanessa was listening intently to the whole thing and she smiled in the right places and assured Hailey in the right ones. Finally Hailey was done and she was impatiently waiting for Vanessa's reactions. The first thing Vanessa said to Hailey shocked her, she had not expected her friend to say this first, "So you still haven't told him how you feel? You expected him to read between the lines and save you the trouble?"

"That's neither here nor there Vanessa. It's more complicated than that and you know it," Hailey said trying her best to justify herself, knowing deep down that she was primarily afraid to accept her feelings fully.

"I know Hailey, but Jay literally told you he loves you and you barely told him anything on those lines. It's more tragic because we both know that you love him," Vanessa said, hoping to make herself clear.

"But he understood what I was going to say, so it doesn't matter," Hailey replied back again knowing fully well that she wasn't making too much sense.

"It does matter Hailey and I am sure you know that very well. Why can't you just open up a little?" Vanessa pressed.

"Because I can't," Hailey said, dodging her feelings again.

Vanessa knew exactly what this was about and she took a bold risk, knowing her next words could go in two ways, "Booth is dead. He's never coming back."

It took Hailey a moment to respond, she knew this fact only too well, but the firmness with which Vanessa stated this made her realise that she was actually holding on to nothing, only the memories were tormenting her and she could get them under control if she tried. She looked up at Vanessa and nodded, not really sure how to respond. But Vanessa was not going to drop the matter. She continued, "Hailey, you are stronger than all this and you must overcome this. As much as I agree with you, you have to feel for Jay. He almost lost you, then you shut him out of your life and when you finally let him in, you didn't fully give yourself to him. In spite of all this he hasn't acted aggressively or rudely. Just put yourself in his shoes once and see, I am sure your perspective will change after that."

Hailey knew Vanessa was right and for the first time she realised how much she had pushed Jay away. He had literally opened his heart to her, showed his most vulnerable and sensitive side, but she had avoided him altogether. This had to change and it had to change fast. Jay deserved better and she was going to give him what he deserved. The thought that traversed through her mind at that particular moment was uplifting and liberating. She couldn't help but notice how much Jay loved her to bear with all this without complaining or even dismissing her problems. He definitely deserved more and she was going to make sure that that happened. Her love for him only increased and she felt protected in a way she never had before. Seeing Hailey in deep thought Vanessa was convinced that she had got through to her. So she decided to leave her with her thoughts, "I see, you are pondering over things. I am going to leave you to your thoughts."

"Yeah, thanks Vanessa. It really means a lot that you're helping me out through all this," Hailey said genuinely.

"That's what friends are for Hailey. And you would have done the same thing for me," she said getting up.

"Yeah, thank you again," Hailey said, meaning it.

The following morning Hailey was eager to meet Jay and talk to him. Now that she was aware of her real feelings she couldn't wait to share them with him. But as fate would have it, there never was a free moment in which she could talk to him privately. Intelligence was never on a break and today a new case had presented itself. The team had been too preoccupied with it to even think about other things. Throughout the day Hailey found herself worrying more about Halstead than she ever had before. She didn't want to let him out of her sight and nor did she want him to be the first through any door. But Jay was too involved in doing his job to notice this. As the team returned to the district in the evening, ending their shift, Hailey sighed internally, really relieved that this day was over without a hitch and that finally she would have a moment with Jay. She informed Vanessa that she was going to Jay's place and Vanessa was happy for her friend, she was happy to hear that Hailey was finally ready to open up fully.

As they settled on the couch with dinner Hailey decided to speak before he would say something and make her fumble. She started confidently, "Jay, I need to speak to you."

Sensing her urgent tone, he stopped unpacking the dinner and looked at her. He said, "Okay, what's the matter Hailey?"

"I am sorry about yesterday. I am sorry about all these past few days, I have really avoided you and I didn't think about how you would feel. It's just that I am terrified to do this Jay. I can't go through more pain and you mean too much to me and I don't want to lose you."

This was good, Hailey thought, as she was formulating her next sentence. She was finally opening up and it felt good, surprisingly. She continued, gaining more confidence, "I have had feelings for you since a long time but I was too afraid to act upon them, unable to think about the pain I would have to go through if this didn't work out."

She paused again, realising now that the main moment had arrived where she would give her heart to this man, who she was sure, would protect it and never let it be hurt. "Jay, I love you. You have no idea how much I love you. You cannot imagine how much you mean to me. It's really the world, you are my world and I want you to know it," she finished, glad that she had finally let her deep and hidden feelings out in the open.

All that while Jay had been listening to her attentively. His heart was overjoyed with so much bliss that he feared it would explode. He couldn't believe she had told him those soulful words that he had longed to hear for so long. He felt so liberated and fulfilled. He approached her on the couch and took her hands in his, thinking that this pure moment didn't require any sort of physicality. "Hailey, I love you too. You are my life and without you I am empty. You are my everything and I give you my heart completely, trusting that you will always nourish it and let it grow so that I could love you more."

Hailey was too moved by his words to simply let them pass. She hugged him tightly and whispered, with full emotion, "Thank you, thank you for always being by my side and always understanding me."

She was crying now and for once her tears were of joy. She was too overwhelmed by this precious moment and she knew she would never ever forget this moment. It was imprinted in her mind forever. Jay simply smiled, just looking at her. It was one of his greatest pleasures to simply look at her and wonder how he had gotten so lucky. A moment was forever captured in their hearts and in this moment they knew that nobody could love them more than the other.

Suddenly the doorbell rang and yanked both of them out of their thoughts. Hailey got up intending to open the door and Jay went to grab some dishes for dinner. As Hailey opened the door she was facing a woman. She didn't recognise the woman and the woman too didn't seem to know her. Hailey asked, "Yes, whom are you looking for?"

"Is this Jay Halstead's house?" the woman asked.

Hailey was surprised to find out that this woman knew Jay for some reason and was clearly looking for him. She answered hesitatingly, still not sure how to handle this, "Yes, it is. I am sorry, who are you?"

The woman realised she hadn't introduced herself and she said, "I'm Abby, Jay's wife."

At those words Hailey thought she was either dreaming or her ears were not functioning properly. The shock Hailey was undergoing was one she had never experienced in her life before. She couldn't decide what was more shocking, the fact that Jay had a wife or that he didn't tell her about it or that the wife actually showed up at his place. For a split second she wondered whether she should believe this woman or not. It could simply be a prank after all. But currently Hailey was in a state in which she couldn't believe anything, because all that was happening was beyond her belief and understanding.

Jay sensed the delay and enquired who it was, placing the dishes and setting dinner for the both of them. "Who is it Hailey?" he asked.

"You're wife," these were the only words that came out of Hailey's mouth.

That concludes the twelfth chapter. I know I have left it on a cliffhanger but I am eager to hear back from you guys. Please comment and share your thoughts, it would really mean a lot. Thank you for reading till here, I appreciate each and every one of you. :)

Side Note: Well, the seasons have been cut short this year and we aren't going to get them back until January. It is slightly disappointing but that's the way it is this time. Although, the promo was a clear sign that something will finally happen between Upstead. It is the cherry on top of the cake, the final long wait. And if this time nothing happens, I am pretty sure no one will care anymore. But let's hope for the best and wait along. :)