Chapter 12

November 26, 1920

Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin

It was a chilly morning in Chippewa Falls, one that had Jack, Mia, and I huddled in the living room, in front of the fireplace. Jack had taught Mia how to toast marshmallows in the fireplace, and if I had to guess, she probably ate about ten marshmallows at once. I allowed her to, of course, somehow trying to balance out the extremely controlling environment she had just escaped with a completely lenient one. Perhaps that wasn't the right approach, but I didn't care. I still had the memory of Cal hurting Mia fresh in my mind, despite the fact that she seemed to have forgotten it.

I was curled up with a book, one that Jack had borrowed from the library for me. Next to me, Mia was playing with one of her dolls, while Jack read the newspaper. It was moments like these, moments where we all were sitting together, yet were quietly doing our own activities, that I felt content in a way I never had before. I felt at peace, calm, happy, surrounded by the people I cared about most. "Wait a second," said Jack, quickly flipping through the crinkly pages of the newspaper.

I put my index finger on my page and closed the book, looking up at him. "What is it?" I asked.

He looked at the newspaper again for another moment. "Today's Thanksgiving." He stared at me for a moment. "I can't believe I forgot. Huh." He looked back down at the paper, then back up at me. "Well, we better figure out something to do."

I nodded and started brainstorming. "Well, Mia and I can't go anywhere, but you're more than welcome to." I wouldn't blame him for leaving. I'd turned his entire life upside down with our arrival and presence in his house, I'd in some way stuck him with a child that wasn't even his, I certainly wouldn't ask him to abandon whatever traditions he had for us too.

"No, I'm not going anywhere," Jack looked at me with a smile and I smiled back, feeling warm again. Since the night of our kiss out on the patio, we had let down more of our walls and allowed each other to see more of the dark pasts we wished we could abandon. We had ended the night with a long embrace and a promise to keep opening up to each other, to keep letting down our walls, no matter how long it took. "We don't really have any Thanksgiving food, but that's not a problem. I'll go out and buy some." Jack quickly put on his shoes, then turned back to us. "Do either of you need anything?"

I took a moment to appreciate how wonderful he was. He was going out to buy us a Thanksgiving dinner, leaving behind whatever plans he originally had, just for us. I couldn't be more grateful for his kindness. "No, thank you," I smiled.

"More grilled cheese!" Mia exclaimed. She was sitting on my lap now, clapping her hands together. I laughed, smiling down at her.

Jack laughed too. "More grilled cheese." He smiled, taking his coat, buttoning it all the way up, and throwing on a pair of gloves. "I'll be back soon." He waved as he left. And suddenly, I felt a weird feeling in my chest. Not a physical feeling, but rather an emotional feeling.

It felt like part of my heart had left my chest, like something important was gone. I shoved it aside, assuring myself that I was being crazy. We hadn't been together in years. We had one kiss, one that I interrupted, and that was it. We weren't in love, we weren't in a relationship... why would I feel this way?

I decided to distract myself and focus on Mia. I turned to look at her, and she looked back at me. "Do you want to play a game? Read a book?" I asked. Mia shook her head tiredly, leaning back against me. "Or we can just sit here and do nothing."

Mia and I ended up playing a few games while Jack was gone. I couldn't pay attention to Mia, my eyes were just glued to the door. I desperately wanted it to open, for Jack to come in with the groceries so I could take his coat, help him warm up, and help him cook. As more time passed, my nervousness increased by the minute. "Mommy!" My head whipped around, looking at Mia again. "It's your turn!"

"Oh, right," I played my turn of… whatever card game we were playing; I was so distracted that I honestly didn't remember. I tried to keep myself focused on Mia, on the countless games we played and books we read, but I just couldn't.

After a while, Mia grew tired and fell asleep on the couch. She had her head on my lap, the rest of her small body lying horizontally on the couch. I stroked her hair, watched her sleep, and just looked at her.

It had been a while since she had fallen asleep and I could just stare at her. I did it often when she was an infant. I would sit in the large rocking chair in her room, memorizing each feature, each little freckle, each dimple in her cheek. I remembered what she looked like then, and I noticed all the ways she had matured since then. Her eyes were still a light blue, just like mine, dark eyelashes accenting the color. She had a tiny little upturned nose, perfect on her little face. Her pinkish lips were slightly parted, taking in air and letting it out. Her auburn curls were splayed across my lap, and I played with them in my fingers.

I heard the door open, then, after hours of anxiously watching the door. I slowly eased Mia's head up, stood up, and placed her head back down on a pillow. I covered her with a small wool blanket, then went to greet Jack. "You were out for a while. Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, of course," Jack smiled. I took the grocery bags from him, placed them down, then went to take his coat. Jack looked at me, somewhat surprised, I believe, that I was doing these things, after living in a life where everything was done for me. "Come on, let's talk in the kitchen."

I glanced at Mia, making sure she was alright, and we quietly snuck into the kitchen. "Thank you for getting all of this food," I said while unpacking the bags. I had learned my way around Jack's kitchen. I knew where things belonged, more or less, and I was slowly learning to cook the staples in Jack's household. He had given us an official tour when we came, trying to get us to feel more comfortable in his house. Slowly, I was getting used to being in someone else's house and not acting like a guest, even though it was against my nature.

Jack smiled at me as we continued to unpack. "Of course. I'm happy to do it." I don't think Jack understood how amazing he was. He would take care of a married woman and her child, protect them from evil, he would talk to a little girl about her favorite things, actively trying to make her feel comfortable, he would abandon whatever plans he had (I was convinced that he did have plans, that he wasn't really going to just sit at home on Thanksgiving) for others. He was wonderful, and I didn't know how to help him see that. "I got so much grilled cheese, Mia will be having it every day."

I chuckled. Mia loved him, I could tell. Not because of the endless grilled cheese or because he took her to see the bunnies, but because he treated her wonderfully. He treated her like a human being, like a child, like someone special. No one, other than me, had ever treated her that way before. "Thank you, Jack." It was all I could say. All words seemed inferior at the moment.

•••

We ate our dinner a little later. It was strange to be celebrating Thanksgiving dinner with a large feast for only a few people. In the past, we hosted a Thanksgiving gala for Pittsburgh society. It was a fancy affair of course. I would wear my fanciest dress, usually one that cut off my circulation and restricted my breathing. I couldn't eat anything, of course, both because of the dress and because if I did, my mother would scold me about staying 'trim'.

But this year, I sat in my most comfortable outfit, a light green dress that wasn't so binding but still showed off my figure, and no corset or heels. Not to mention, it was my first thanksgiving with Mia. Before now, Mia was fed dinner and put to bed by a nanny, and I was forced to leave her and attend the gala.

We began to eat our dinner, the classic Thanksgiving dinner: turkey, sweet potato, cranberry sauce, and pie. "So," Jack said, placing his fork on the table. "I assume this is your first casual Thanksgiving dinner," Jack teased me, arching an eyebrow. I rolled my eyes playfully. "Well, in the houses where there is no fancy champagne and caviar," I blushed at the reference, "we usually go around and say what we're thankful for."

I smiled. "Really?" I asked. Jack nodded, smiling back at me. "I like that."

Jack smiled at me, reaching for my hand under the table. As he took it, I let out a sigh, calmness washing over me. "I'll start," Jack said. He looked at Mia and I. "I'm thankful for the air in my lungs, the food on the table, and the excellent company here tonight."

I smiled, squeezing his hand gently. "I'll go," I smiled, taking a deep breath. "I'm thankful for my daughter," I smiled at Mia, and she smiled back at me. "I'm thankful to be , and to be here with both of you." I looked at Jack and smiled. "I'm really thankful for both of you."

Both Jack and I looked at Mia, waiting for her to go. She just looked down and kept eating. Finally, she looked up, her eyes darting back and forth between Jack and I. "My turn?" She asked. "Oh, well… I'm thankful for my mommy finally being happy."

Mia looked at me and smiled, and I almost started to cry. She must have noticed, since she quickly stood up and walked over to where I was sitting and hugged me tightly. "I love you," I whispered, kissing the top of her head. I held her on my lap and smiled.

•••

After dinner, I quickly put Mia to bed. She had fallen asleep on the couch after dinner, so I just carried her up to bed, changed her into a nightgown, and tucked her in. She didn't even wake up throughout the whole process. I whispered good night, quietly closed the door, and walked downstairs.

Jack was standing in the kitchen, washing dishes. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, his hands were in the sink, covered in suds as he scrubbed a large pan. He was humming something familiar, something I recognized right away, and I felt a pang in my chest. He was humming the melody of "Come Josephine" in a quiet off-key voice I had never heard him use before. It wasn't the cheerful voice he sang in when we walked along the deck after the steerage party, it was a heartbroken voice of someone who had lost everything. And Jack had lost everything in his life: his parents, though all I knew was that they had died, his best friend, and me. I was back now, but I knew there was still a part of him grieving for me as if I wasn't, and grieving the fact that we hadn't been together all these years and the fact that he couldn't save me from Cal.

I stood against the doorframe, just listening to him sing while completely oblivious to my presence. He finished cleaning the pan and turned around to put it on the drying rack. The corners of his mouth curved up in a sad smile. "How long have you been there?"

I took the pan from him, placing it on the drying rack myself. "Not long," I said quietly. Jack went back to the sink to wash the next dish, and I got ready to take it. "I'll dry the dishes so they don't have to sit out." He looked at me, arching an eyebrow. He wanted to be chivalrous, to do the cleaning himself, but for once, I wanted to do something myself. It felt like an indulgence, to be able to help clean up after dinner. "I can help. I want to help."

Jack sighed. He looked tired, as if he didn't want to argue with me. He knew it was no use, that I was too strong willed to be talked out of doing something I wanted to do. "If you're sure you want to…" He went back to washing the dishes, and we quickly fell into a routine of him washing a dish and handing it to me, and me drying it.

Things had changed since we first arrived. Jack and I were accustomed to seeing each other every day, waking up and seeing each other in the kitchen. We had accustomed to being able to interact in a friendly way, while also having moments of truth where we broke down in front of each other. Jack had told me about his rehabilitation after Titanic, how difficult it was to keep going when he had lost all gross motor skills and he lost everyone he cared about. I told him, reluctantly, about my marriage, and how I thought he would be so disappointed in me for going back. He told me he wasn't, that he couldn't be more proud of me.

Mia had gotten really close to Jack. She went from being a little girl, afraid of anyone other than me, to being playful, engaging, and brave. She talked more now, instead of just being seen and not heard. I had Jack to thank for that. He always talked to her, joked with her, played games with her. He saved her, just like he saved me. I put the towel down on the counter. "Hey, Jack?"

Jack was still washing the dishes absentmindedly. "Hmm?" He didn't turn around, he didn't look up, and he didn't stop doing the dishes, which was fine. It was easier to talk to him without getting distracted while looking at him.

"Could you do me a favor?" I asked. I was still facing the dish rack, he was still facing the sink, and our backs were to each other.

I heard the faucet close and a dish hit the bottom of the sink. I turned around, and Jack walked over to me. His hand reached down and took mine, and he looked into my eyes. "Anything," he said.

I swallowed hard, finally looking into his eyes. "Kiss me." I didn't know what I was doing, my heart was taking control while my brain was still numb. I could feel Jack looking into my eyes, making sure I was serious, that I knew what I was doing. Slowly, he leaned over, touching his forehead to mine, then once he knew I was okay, he leaned over the rest of the way, touching his lips to mine. I placed my hands on his collarbone, then brought one hand up to the nape of his neck. Jack was holding my waist with one hand, pulling me closer, while his other hand was on my cheek.

I opened my eyes every time we came up for air, stealing glances at him every time, just to make sure he wasn't a figment of my imagination. His taste was the same, spearmint and cigarettes (wonderful, no matter how gross it seems). It made all thoughts disappear, and all I could do was think about him.

Jack paused, pulling away and looking into my eyes. We stared into each other's eyes, breathless. I realized then that this was what I wanted. This was what I wanted since I knocked on the door and met Jack's eyes for the first time, when he told me he'd take care of us, even during the last kiss, even though I was too afraid to follow through.

"Don't stop," I said breathlessly. My hands were still on him, wandering his chest, his biceps, his hair, his neck, everywhere I could put them. I inwardly begged him to kiss me again, to touch me the way only he was able to. "Please."

I didn't recognize myself in that moment, begging for him to keep going. Jack looked into my eyes, checking that I was alright. I nodded quickly, and before I knew it, he was kissing me again, his hands gripped the back of my thighs as he lifted me and placed me on the counter. I wrapped my legs around his hips, pulling him in closer. Our hands traveled far and wide as our tongues danced.

As Jack's lips traveled to my neck, I gasped for air. My breathing was heavy, unrecognizable to me. I gripped Jack's hair, still panting. "Jack," I managed to get out between breaths. "We…" I moaned as Jack nipped at my neck. "We can't do this here. Mia."

Jack pulled away, and both of us panted, staying in the same position. I was sitting on the counter still, my legs were wrapped around him. His hands were on my waist, mine were on his shoulders. "We can go to my room… if you want to." I knew he didn't want to be presumptuous, to assume that I was ready for that, but I was.

I nodded quickly. "Yes," I said confidently, not a shadow of doubt in my mind that this was what I wanted. I pulled him closer, close enough that I could nip at his ear and whisper, "Put your hands on me, Jack."

•••

We walked up to Jack's room slowly and awkwardly. Once we got to his room, which was mostly dark, only lit by the moon, we started over, I believe. The hesitance from downstairs had returned as we both stood in front of each other, unable to move. I hesitantly placed my hands on Jack's chest while he slowly took my waist. "Are you sure this is what you want?" Jack asked quietly. His eyes, still light despite the darkness in the room.

I nodded, leaning forward and placing my lips on his. Our arms tightened around each other as our tongues danced and our nerves seemed to disappear for the time being. Jack's hand was on my waist, but it slowly lowered until it hit my hip. There. He touched the one part of my body that meant the most to me, the tattoo, and he didn't even know it.

I realized in that moment that he had no idea I had that tattoo. He didn't know that even when I was with Cal all of these years, I belonged to him. I wondered how he would react to finding it. I didn't want to point it out to him, for whatever reason. I decided that I would let him find it on his own.

Jack moved his lips down to my neck as I moaned softly. I gripped the nape of his neck and my eyes rolled to the back of my head. He kissed my collarbone before I lifted his head to meet my lips again. I gave him one last kiss before turning around and allowing him to unbutton my dress. I slid my arms out of it, letting it fall to my feet. I stepped out of it, only wearing my brassiere and stockings.

My lips stayed glued to Jack's as I unbuttoned his shirt, sliding it off his shoulders. My hands settled on his warm chest, while Jack removed my stockings. I sat down on his bed in only my brassiere and underwear. Jack pulled away to take off his pants, staring at me as he did so. His eyes roamed up and down, and I saw them settle on my hip. Only the very top of the tattoo was exposed. "What is that?" He asked quietly.

I turned to look at it, slowly pulling down the waistband to show him what it was. The JD was visible then. He knelt down to look at it, running his finger over it. "I got it right after you… um…" I looked down, unable to speak. He knew what I was going to say anyway. I couldn't tell what he was thinking, and that was terrifying to me. He just stared at it, not speaking or making any facial expressions. "Jack, say something, please."

He stared at it for another moment before looking up at me. "Why?" He asked.

"Because I've always been yours," I answered simply. "I've always belonged to you."

Jack cupped my cheek in his hand. "Rose… you're not mine. I never wanted you to be mine. I never wanted you to belong to me," he said quietly. "I wanted you to be your own person, your own mind. I wanted you to belong to yourself."

I shook my head. "That's not what I meant," I whispered. "I… even though we only had those few days together, or so I thought at the time, it was more than that. I knew you'd be with me forever." My arms were wrapped around him. "I needed to have you with me physically, as well as emotionally."

As I said those words, all hesitation and awkwardness flew out the window as our lips crashed together. I jumped into his arms and he caught me, holding me close to him.

Jack slowly placed me down on the bed, hovering on top of me. We shed the rest of our layers before connecting for the first time in eight years. I felt the exact same thing I felt all those years ago, in the back of the Renault car: I felt complete.

A/N: Happy new year everyone! I realize it's a bit late to be posting a Thanksgiving chapter, but the way the dates lined up in this story, it just made sense. Also, I had a problem posting this chapter so that's why I had to delete it and repost. Hope you enjoyed the chapter!