I woke up with a start, caused by the noise of something tapping on glass. At first I didn't recognize my surroundings. I had fallen asleep in the car… and Ty Lee was on the other side of the door, staring impatiently at me through the glass.
"Ty? What time is it?" I asked, confused as she kept knocking on the window with her knuckles. Belatedly, I opened the door.
"Finally! Be thankful that the night guard decided to let me know that he let you in with the car and then didn't see you leave." She pushed a package in my direction. "You have time to change your clothes before going to pick up Katara."
Inside the package I found a change of clothes, which included a more casual jacket that I could hardly remember ever wearing. Maybe it had been a gift from my uncle.
"And this." She handed me a key, the one to the family's house in Caldera. "I don't think Katara would like another girl coming and going from your house like nothing, even if she is your assistant to bring you things."
"You put a lot of trust in my success to convince her that she cares about who enters my house." I put everything in the briefcase where the tickets were already, along with the key to a house that I avoided visiting at all costs.
"Yes I do," she said simply and with a radiant smile. "Just be yourself and when in doubt, ask yourself: what would Ty Lee advise me at this troubling time?"
"I don't know how many times I owe you my life." I got out of the car and we both walked toward the elevator. "Thanks, Ty."
"You better hurry up and thank me with an invitation to your wedding," I stumbled.
"Isn't it a bit hasty to think about that?" My face burned. It wasn't like I hadn't thought of it, but it seemed very far-fetched to contemplate it at this point.
"Who knows? Maybe not as much as you think." She winked and said goodbye to me to let me change before returning to the car and going to Katara, full of renewed energy.
I no longer had just determination. Now I also had hope.
The filters to enter the airport seemed shorter than in the last trip, or maybe it was that they were a little more familiar to me. The flight left at noon and it would last less than the one from Chin City to Caldera. We would arrive shortly before dark.
Zuko took me to eat a late lunch while I told him about my grandmother and my childhood at the South Pole, the absolute silence of the freezing winter nights, and the time I, together with my brother and Aang, dodged the ice in the rapids of the river. coast.
The conversation continued once we settled into our seats on the plane. Apparently he had inherited a certain love for theater plays from his mother. Eventually he finished telling me the plot of "Love Among Dragons", the play that he saw the most in his childhood. There was a bit of silence and I stared out the window, and was hit by the realization that an airplane had more in common with a movie theater than I had previously thought.
On my first date with Haru, we went to the movies together. Once the popcorn was gone, our hands were on the arms of the chairs, in positions a little too uncomfortable to be natural, but without finishing holding each other's hand. Just what was happening at that moment with Zuko.
I readjusted myself so that the backs of our hands touched and closed my eyes. Since this flight was daytime, it would be difficult to sleep. Even more difficult because of the agitation that my traveling companion produced in me...
Still, I kept my eyes closed and for the second time in a few days, I asked myself the same question.
Why am I here?
My face burned at the memory of the pathetic reason that, flooded with nervousness, was everything I could think of stating as an obstacle to the trip of my dreams. It seemed like he could read my mind.
But the real reason for my hesitation had a name: my marriage to Aang. I was far from my husband and I was not unaware of what could happen during this trip. It was no longer a job offer… this time it was a personal invitation.
At the South Pole we weren't puritans, by no means. What happened before marriage mattered little. What happened after a marriage, on the other hand, was another matter entirely. A married woman visiting the home of a single man, alone… even if the husband knew about it, it would immediately be called "betrayal."
The night before, I called Yue again, to ask her (again) if she had any news from Aang. She had even visited the house to see if there were any notes or letters. Nothing. When I said goodbye to her, I tried not to let the lump in my throat block my voice, but she seemed to sense my dismay.
"I want to tell you something. I know that my parents love me and I also know that they hurt me by imposing on me a marriage that I didn't want. What I mean is that the two things are not mutually exclusive, that's how we humans are. You are very generous, I already told you. Think of yourself first this time."
Aang had left first. But I knew that he loved me, and that maybe he would look for me later... Maybe the right thing to do was to wait for him.
What if that never happens?
But he loves me, he only needs a while to sort out some things...
Or you could stop justifying him , whispered a little voice much like my grandmother's. How are you supposed to know what he thinks if he disappears? If when you speak he just won't listen?
And in Yue's voice, the lesson that had taken her so much pain to learn. Sometimes love is not enough to keep a family together. Sometimes it is no longer healthy for you to stay there and you just have to accept it.
I could accept it.
I snapped my eyes open and inhaled sharply, my supposed nap already forgotten.
Let Aang contact me whenever he wanted. I would go on with my life without him and we would see. According to my customs, he had abandoned me and I refused to languish and do nothing as if my life and my decisions and my well-being depended on him... not anymore.
In the armchair next to me, Zuko turned to see me with some concern plain in his eyes.
"Is everything alright?" He asked, scrutinizing my face, in which part of my thoughts were surely reflected.
"Everything is fine." I smiled and took his hand. His eyes widened, especially the one without a scar. "How much flight time left?"
"Um... about two hours." He hesitated for a moment, casting a fleeting glance at our joined hands.
"Okay." With a strange inner peace, I closed my eyes again without removing my hand.
I leaned back in the seat, smiling. It was the start of living just for myself. And this was what I wanted to do. It seemed like it took some time for him to trust that I took his hand by decision and not by mistake, and his thumb began to stroke my knuckles with the softness of a sigh.
I pretended to wake up for the complimentary refreshment the airline offered and until then I let go of his hand. We spent the rest of the time in light conversation, and while I lacked the courage to take his hand again, I didn't lack the desire. Time passed lightly until landing, when we got to our feet and he had to remove his briefcase from the shelves above the seats.
After more paperwork (which left new stamps in my passport), we waited in the band to pick up my pathetically small suitcase (at least, compared to other tourists') and then we got into another car. This driver smiled sincerely as he greeted Zuko and then me.
Once settled in the back seat, I began to move my ankles in small circles. My feet felt heavy.
"That happens when you've been sitting for a long time," Zuko commented when he noticed. My theory that she could read my mind resurfaced. "Don't look at me like that, I've been to a lot of flights longer than this. Wait for the effects of the jet lag. It's good it didn't affect you in Caldera."
"What's the difference from Chin City?" Suddenly my tiredness made more sense. The time difference between Chin City and Caldera was two hours, and between the house at the South Pole it was barely an hour, due to its proximity to the pole. The stripes were much narrower there.
"Five hours," he yawned. I wasn't the only one tired. "We will eat something and I advise that you try to sleep. Tomorrow, daylight will help you get used to the new timezone."
"Sounds good." I closed my eyes until she spoke again.
"Um… I also had an additional favor to ask of you." He smiled apologetically and I nodded for him to continue. "I cannot miss the opportunity. I'd like you to tell me your opinion of the house and its decoration. My uncle never stops criticizing the good sense of the decorator."
"I'll see how bad it is," I agreed, amused. "But I'm not an expert or anything. The one who knows about decoration is my friend Yue."
We came to a long street lined with high stone fences, and an iron gate opened to allow the car to pass. We continued along a paved path to a bay, not unlike one found at a hotel, directly in front of the door. Zuko helped me out and as he opened the front door, the driver took the car away.
He pushed the door aside and ushered me into a very spacious room, with a parquet floor in intricate geometric designs and a ceiling so high that it could accommodate two floors of regular buildings.
"This is a mansion, not a house." The only thing missing was a chandelier. I turned around to see everything around. There was some living room furniture on a rug, which looked small compared to the floor-to-ceiling picture window through which you could see a huge garden, with trees that seemed very suitable for having a picnic in its shade. Despite the furniture, there was a large free space in front of the wide staircase that led to the second floor.
"So… what do you think?" I heard him next to me, with a drop of nervousness in his voice.
"It's impressive, I can't deny it. But I think…" My eyes wandered lightly over the coordinated colors, the elegant furnishings, the carefully selected decorations. It looked like a party room, empty and impersonal, as if waiting for temporary furniture and occupants for a single afternoon. There were no photographs on the walls, nothing that told me anything about Zuko among the objects present. "I think it lacks warmth. Other furniture, flowers, a dog. Do you even spend time here?"
"Not much." He seemed reluctant to accept it. "There is no fixed office and I move between three or four cities, sometimes more."
"Do you have houses like this in all of them?" I raised my eyebrows.
"No, I have an apartment in Gaolin, Omashu's hotel suite, and if not, I simply sleep in the office." He put a hand behind his neck.
"What kind of life is that !?" I was horrified. Feeling at home somewhere would be impossible like this; he could afford the most expensive restaurants and buy new clothes every day, but it seemed like an awkward existence anyway. With just a few days gone, I was already beginning to miss home cooking.
"Moving so much keeps me busy. I still haven't found a good reason to stay somewhere." He gave me a sad smile. "Let's go to the dining room?"
He didn't give me time to reply. Keep him busy... so he doesn't think about something? Judging from what I knew about him, that "something" would have to do with his family. And with a look at this house, I sensed that he must also feel unbearably lonely. I reached for his arm and followed him through another door on the opposite side of the window.
The dining room, to my great peace of mind, was spacious but had a normal table. I had feared it was one of those tables several meters long where the two people sat each at one end…
A woman about ten years older than me approached us with two bowls of light soup with small pieces of meat. It still seemed very strange to me to have someone do things for me that I would normally do myself, like serve food. Or prepare it.
We finished eating in silence. A void of anticipation settled in my stomach. I couldn't believe that just a few days ago I'd been scared off by the possibility that Zuko would hint at me again, and now I rather wished he would.
I followed him up the stairs, too aware of my steps.
"I hope you're comfortable. If you need anything at all, you can tell me. This is your room." He opened a cedar door that led into a room exactly like what you would expect in a mansion like this: impersonal and luxurious. In that sense, the yacht room seemed a lot more inhabited than everything in this house.
"But I thought I'd be with y…" I covered my mouth as I realized what I was going to say.
That I would be with you, in your room. Or at least that's what I thought he was going to suggest. Was I misreading his intentions? My cheeks burned.
Zuko choked on a cough.
"If... if you wish, of course. You are welcome in any room of the house you choose. Even" his voice faltered for a moment, "even in mine."
"Thanks." I held on to the door until my knuckles turned white. There was no way I had misheard that, and although it was more like what I had expected, panic prompted me to pretend it hadn't happened. "At... what time should we leave tomorrow?"
My sight was wherever he was not.
"The Jasmine Dragon opens at 9. Around that time is perfect." I glanced at him. His hands were behind his back and his voice was strained. "I don't bother you anymore, rest well."
"Good evening," I replied behind him back before closing the door.
I groaned as I rested my forehead on the wooden surface. I almost gave in to the urge to reopen and call him back.
I was frightened by the force of the magnetism that drew me to him. And at the same time, all I wanted was to abandon myself to him and forget everything else. The downside was that "everything else" was quite insistent and hard to ignore.
I no longer had a relationship with Aang, that much I had decided. But the last time I saw him was less than a month before. And I still loved him, those weren't feelings that could vanish entirely from one day to the next.
And just as hard to ignore was the fact that despite all that… I wanted to be with Zuko. For a not so short time.
Would he accept me? Would he want me to stay, or was he only looking for me as something fleeting? And if he wanted me to stay, would he accept me despite the emotional mess that my separation from Aang would mean? The answers were the only thing left unsolved. When I found out those answers, I would surely sleep in another room, either in this house or back in Chin City.
I would ask him. A little calmer with my decision, I was finally able to fall asleep.
I practically ran without stopping until I reached my room, the only place in the house where I felt some sort of comfortable. I threw myself hard on the bed and covered my eyes with my hands.
The human curse of perpetual dissatisfaction, of infinite longing. Twenty-four hours earlier, I was the happiest man in the world just because she would be at my house. Now that that had been accomplished, I wanted her to sleep next to me instead.
What was I thinking to tell her that?
Sincerity was the best policy, that was always my uncle's advice. That kind of honesty, though… I wasn't sure Ty Lee would approve of it.
Still, there was at least one day to repair the damage. I wouldn't pressure her, but I hoped it was implied that he would stay the rest of the week. If all went well, then we would arrange a next visit, or she would stay even longer...
I breathed deeply, willing my heart to ease its rhythm. The battle was not over yet, and I was going to overcome this slip up.
Appa's anguished howl reached my seat from the trunk of the bus. I clenched my hands on the armrest of the seat, wanting more than anything in the world to stop the bus, get Appa out of his cage and get him settled down next to me. The conditions imposed by the bus company to transport pets included the payment of an extra half a ticket and that the animal had to travel sedated, in a transport cage inside the trunk. I only agreed because my need to get to Omashu with Appa was greater than my hatred of conditions. The only good thing would be that at least, being sedated, he wouldn't be disturbed by movement, noise, and darkness. He hated the carrier cage and enclosed spaces.
It would have been passable, if not for the flat tire that increased the trip from 12 to 15 hours. Now, in the last two hours of the trip, the effect of the sedative had worn off and Appa was alone in the darkness of the trunk, with nothing familiar around and without me being able to reach him.
Another distressed howl reached my seat and I barely remained there. Other passengers were already beginning to notice the sound. I took a deep breath and tried to calm down, but it was impossible with Appa's wailing that kept coming.
"Less than two hours, we're almost there... Appa, I'm so sorry." My hands tightened again and I squeezed my eyes shut.
At least we already had a place to go. I contacted Jet to tell him about my new job, leaving out most of the details about my fight with Katara. He immediately agreed to offer me a couch to sleep in his house until I had money for my own place.
It seemed that an important part of the reason the university had hired me even without doing a formal interview was that a professor was urgently needed for the semester that was about to start. It helped that I was willing to move wherever they needed and had readily accepted the weirdest, earliest and latest, hours.
The lights of the metropolis came to illuminate with a little hope my anguish for Appa. Time passed. Crawling like tar over concrete, but it passed.
As soon as they opened the door of the bus in the last stop, I ran to the trunk where I got Appa and my three luggage boxes. I was good at traveling light and those three boxes were basically everything I owned. The rest of the things would stay in the rented room, which was covered for at least another month, so I could return for my belongings later.
I spent several minutes reassuring Appa. At the South Pole, it was fine for him to follow the car I was riding in, but in the city, it was a terrible idea. Almost as bad as trying to get him into a cab after the stressful bus experience.
All in all, after a while I managed to get him on board and paid for the taxi with part of my precious savings to get to Jet's house along with all my luggage. The taxi driver was patient and gentle and even helped me unload my bags. I tipped him as high as I could afford before ringing the doorbell. Jet's house was smaller than the one I rented in Chin City, but huge compared to the little room I had inhabited in recent weeks.
"Aang!" Welcome, come in." Jet opened the door for me and Appa entered cautiously. "Did you have a good trip? Those buses are infamous, I should know."
"Yeah." All the exhaustion from the trip hit me. "A bit infamous, you are absolutely right. I suffered less last time."
"You came in much better company then," he laughed and I tried not to sour my gesture too much. My bus-worn nerves made it more difficult. "Is Katara moving in with you later?"
"I don't know yet. She had to fix some things at work." My tone sounded forced to my own ears, but Jet didn't give it much thought.
"Oh, it's a shame. A friend of mine was offering some well-paying jobs, I was thinking of suggesting Katara" he helped me carry my boxes inside and the first thing I got out was the plate and a bag of food for Appa. "Something for dinner?"
I gratefully accepted and ate with enthusiasm even though dinner consisted only of some instant noodles. Then Jet led me to the couch where I settled in to sleep. I would have the next day to sort my things and go talk to the executives at the university, and the first class would be on Monday.
The change was welcome.
Me, with tears in my eyes, imploring: Stop, stop writing things that were not in the film or in the original plan of the story.
Me too, with a wall of fire behind me: ADD ANOTHER SCENE
Folks, around here I realized that this turned into a monster with a life of its own. All I hope is that you continue to enjoy this story as I enjoy writing it ^_^ Thanks for reading, and thanks to rahidas04 for her editing! :D