Another huge, huge thank you to everyone that is reviewing and favouriting this story. I really am so grateful, thank you so much for sticking with it :). I also want to say another huge thank you for everybody's patience last week with regards to chapter 13 and whatever glitch the website was having, believe me I know how frustrating it was. Thank you all for stopping by and checking to see if it was available, I really appreciate that.
Anyway, here is chapter 14! Lots of short little scenes here and Mary is back :) Enjoy! xx
He loved her.
As Amy laid in bed, all she could do was replay the words he had just said. She was trying her hardest not to read too much into them, he was drunk after all, but that still didn't stop the words from being unsaid. Still didn't stop them holding a meaning. They had been said, they were out there now and it was all she could think about.
During their relationship, Sheldon had never really proclaimed his love for her. Maybe on the odd, rare occasion. Of course, there were many times where it had been implied but Amy could recall just once or twice where it had been explicitly said.
She rolled on to her left side, a few days ago she had read that this position was the most ideal for a comfortable nights sleep. Right now, as the clock quickly approached 3am it was all she was craving despite all the thoughts whirling through her mind.
She lowered her hand to her bump, feeling the flutters and hard kicks from her little girl beneath her palm was extremely comforting. An obvious reminder that regardless of whatever happened between her and Sheldon she would never truly be alone in this world.
—
With his eyes tightly closed, Sheldon couldn't quite figure out where he was. The fabric beneath him felt unfamiliar, he definitely wasn't in his own bed and he was pretty sure a blanket was draped over him, tangled up between his legs. He stirred, the movement caused what he thought was just a dull ache in his head to something excruciating and pounding. With a groan, he brought his hands up to his eyes, rubbing them as he slowly sat up.
"Oh, you look peachy" Amy laughed from where she was sat at the small island in her kitchen, nursing the mug of coffee in her hands. Amy's voice rang round his head, he still hadn't quite allowed himself to adjust to where he was until he heard her voice.
"My head hurts" he moaned, pushing the palms of his hand to his temple. He was acutely aware of Amy moving around the kitchen, he really didn't appreciate the clatter. "How did I even get here?" he asked, his eyes quickly scanning his surroundings for any clues.
"You told me you walked" Amy didn't quite know how to handle this, she'd never really had to deal with a drunk admission of love before. If he couldn't remember actually getting to her place, she knew it was pretty wishful thinking to assume he remembered the conversation that had taken place once inside.
"Oh dear lord" he groaned, his head tilted back against the arm of the sofa. "I feel so sick"
"Thats what happens Sheldon when you drink too much" Amy scolded, she realised that at times taking care of Sheldon was pretty good practise for motherhood, she smiled to herself knowing that if that was the case she had all of this well and truly in the bag. "Here" she moved around the couch and placed a mug of tea and a plate of toast down in front of him. "You should eat something, it'll make you feel better" she told him.
"Thank you" Amy tapped his legs, a signal for him to move them so she could sit down. Sheldon swung his legs round and very slowly pulled himself up into a sitting position, he knew that any sudden movements would make him hurl. "I'm really sorry about last night" he apologised as he nibbled on the edge of his toast.
"It's okay. It was your birthday, I guess that kind of allows it. Just."
He clearly had no recollection of anything from last night, Amy was pretty sure of it. His very early morning 'I love you', would just have to be something that was put in the past and forgotten. If he couldn't remember saying it, then maybe she could just forget it ever happened. She couldn't quite explain why trying to forget about it bothered her so much.
Sheldon groaned when he reached for his phone and saw a text from his mother letting him know that she had boarded her flight and would be in California in a matter of hours. A tiny, hazy flashback from last night appeared in his head, he could briefly recall some kind of phone call with his mother, clearly he had agreed with her staying for a few days.
"Well, it looks like last night, I invited my mother to stay" he sighed as he stared at the screen.
"You did?"
"Apparently so" he turned to show Amy his phone with the message flashing on the screen. "You wouldn't be able to drive me to the airport would you? I really don't think it's safe for me to drive" this didn't happen often enough for him to be entirely sure but it was a possibility that he was still the tiniest bit drunk.
"Sheldon" Amy sighed, she really did love Mary Cooper but the last thing she wanted to do today was drive to the airport and back, especially after he and their baby had kept her awake for the majority of the night.
"Please. I'm pretty sure she's only coming to see and talk baby things" it had been an internal battle that Sheldon had been struggling with but to now know that he may not be the centre of his mother's world was tough. He had always been her little baby and in many ways, he was and would always be but the baby coming along had completely overshadowed him. The upcoming arrival of his daughter dominated all topics of conversation with his mother and he didn't doubt this trip would be any different.
"Fine" she huffed, hauling herself up off of the couch.
Half an hour later, they were both in the car heading for the airport. Amy had showered, whilst Sheldon battled with knowing that he didn't have a change of clothes and would have to go into the early afternoon wearing his clothes from last night. He had showered too, it was the only way he could make himself feel better about his current clothing predicament.
Although he knew Amy wasn't one of these girls to really dress up, he had never seen her in such casual attire before. It had clearly been a case of quickly throwing on whatever she grabbed first, he wasn't even sure what she was wearing were items she had purchased, the casual sweats and hoodie she had thrown on, he was sure he had once seen Penny in. Despite, her oversized hoodie her bump remained prominent against the material.
"You're very quiet" Sheldon commented, glancing over at Amy who had barely spoken to him throughout the car journey. "Is everything okay?"
"Yeah" Amy nodded. "Just concentrating" her gazed was fixed on the road as both hands gripped the wheel. "How long is she staying for?" Amy asked feeling like she now needed to ask something.
"Just the weekend I think" he wasn't all that sure, he couldn't quite recall the conversation from last night. "I think she said something about making one last trip before the baby was born" suddenly, for the very first time Amy felt really nervous about the baby's arrival. It really was only a matter of months before she became a mother and knowing that the next time she saw Mary, she'd have her own baby was quite a daunting thought.
"Sheldon, we're having a baby really soon. Isn't that scary?"
"A little" he knew his role in all of this wasn't nearly as hard as Amy's was going to be but that still didn't stop the nerves. At the moment, he was just about managing to keep them at bay however, Sheldon knew they wouldn't properly kick in until his daughter was here and he laid eyes on her for the first time.
"Hearing you talk about how we'll probably have our own baby the next time I see your mum, I don't know, everything has just started to suddenly seen so real" Amy explained, what Sheldon had assumed was just a very perfect statement, had triggered a fear in Amy she hadn't known she'd been harbouring. "She's going to have to actually come out isn't she"
"That's normally how it works. I would have assumed someone with your intelligence would know the outcome of pregn..."
"Sheldon, you're not helping" Amy interrupted.
"Okay sorry" he sank back into his seat. "I've been meaning to talk to you about that" Amy's eyes flickered off the road for a split second as she looked over to Sheldon, she didn't quite know what he was getting at. "Penny mentioned something a few weeks ago about how I would cope being in the delivery room with you and it just got me thinking that maybe we should be a little bit more prepared" he explained. "Maybe we should take a class" he added.
It didn't surprised her, she knew Sheldon better than anyone, he was a man that worked on a schedule with a thorough and detailed plan in place. She knew his approach to the labour wouldn't be any different, even though she knew that it really wasn't something you could plan for at all.
"You do know whatever they tell us in a class, its highly unlikely that it will actually happen" despite being a little sceptical about attending a class, she knew this was a big thing for Sheldon so was trying to be gentle in her approach.
"But it's our child Amy, they'll understand the importance of arriving on time and everything running smoothly" Amy laughed, it was times like this where she struggled to know whether he was joking or being serious. His intelligence wouldn't allow him to believe such a thing but he seemed so utterly convinced that their child somehow had an influence over how her labour would be.
"You really believe that?" she asked as the airport came into sight and she began paying a little more attention to the road signs.
"Well, there's no harm in hoping"
—
"Oh my darling, just look at you" Mary gushed as she approached Sheldon and Amy who were patiently stood waiting at the departure gate. She placed the small suitcase that she had been wheeling behind her to the side and enveloped Amy into a huge hug. "Oh don't you look beautiful dear, look at that gorgeous bump" she spoke full of love and excitement as she pulled back from the hug and held her at arms length. The huge smile on her face completely warmed Amy's heart.
"Hello mother"
"Oh, hi my darling boy. Don't go thinking I've forgotten about you" she smiled as she squished his cheeks. "Happy birthday, well for yesterday anyway, I was thinking we could grab some dinner tonight" she explained as they started exiting the airport. All she wanted to do was treat her son, despite his age. "Amy darling, you're more than welcome to join us"
"Oh no, it's fine, I wouldn't want to intrude" she knew that when it came to his mother, Sheldon loved to be the centre of attention, she didn't want to get in the way of that.
"Darlin' I insist, you're part of the family"
—
"Shelly, I can't believe you let you pregnant g..." Mary stopped herself unsure of what to refer to Amy as. Friend seemed far too casual, his mother was incredibly intuitive and even she could see that there was something more going on than friendship, yet girlfriend she felt was a step too far, she didn't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable. "I can't believe you let Amy at 6 months pregnant drive to the airport" she rethought her words and lectured her son from the back seat.
"It's only because he can't handle his drink. Someone partied a little too hard" Amy smiled as she removed her hand from the steering wheel and affectionately tapped his thigh.
"Oh Shelly" Mary laughed shaking her head. "Amy, my dear, tell me all about my little grand baby. How is everything?" she asked full of excitement and enthusiasm.
"Everything is good" Amy smiled. "She's kicking and moving all the time now and we got one of those 4D scans yesterday. Sheldon, show your mum" Amy urged as Sheldon reached for his wallet and took out the small image. Upon seeing the image again, Sheldon had a little flashback from showing the photo to the guys last night, he remembered talking at great lengths about his daughters features. He may have even shown the scan to the bar staff.
"Oh my" she gasped, trying her hardest to hold back the tears. "How amazing, we never had anything like this back in my day. Oh isn't she beautiful, look at those lips"
"Mum, don't cry" Sheldon soothed gently as he turned around in his seat to see his mother's tear stained face. He never liked it when his mother cried whether it was because she was sad or happy, there was something about tears on her cheeks that just didn't sit well with him, they brought back memories from his childhood that he didn't like revisiting.
"I'm sorry" she smiled as she wiped at her cheeks. "She's just so precious and my lovely Shelley's going to be a daddy"
"Keep it" Sheldon told her as she reached across to hand him back the photo. "Amy and I have enough between us" he told her.
"Thank you. Have you guys thought of any names for this darlin'?" Mary asked, as she tried to compose herself no longer wanting to cry in the back of Amy's car.
"No we haven't even discussed anything like that yet" internally Sheldon was panicking, Amy sounded so calm about the fact that they had around 14 weeks left and were yet to discuss names or get anything ready for their baby's arrival. 14 weeks. It really wasn't a long time at all, if anything it was incredibly soon.
"We really should though" Sheldon commented.
"We could always go shopping this afternoon" Mary suggested. "Buy some things for the little ones nursery. Oh, let me buy a crib" she clapped her hands together excitedly.
"You really don't have to do that" Amy was grateful for the offer, she really did appreciate it so much, but she and Sheldon were yet to even discuss the nursery. Was he okay with the nursery being what was currently her spare bedroom? Did they need to discuss a theme? A colour scheme? Right now, it all just seemed a little too much.
"Nonsense, if I can't treat my little grand baby then who can I treat, hey"
—
When the early afternoon rolled round, after both she and Sheldon changed and made themselves look a little more presentable, they found themselves in the middle of a baby store with Mary Cooper cooing at everything from cuddly toys to car seats.
As Amy wandered down the aisles, taking in everything just a few steps behind Sheldon and his mother, her thoughts weren't taken up by all things baby but by the other expectant couples that were passing by.
Couples holding hands and gazing lovingly at one another as they picked out furniture and cute little clothing. They epitomised Amy's idea of perfect couples, they were a family, that's how all of this was supposed to be. She wanted that, she wanted to fall madly in love with someone again, whether that person was Sheldon or not she wasn't sure.
"Oh Amy look" Mary cooed as she held up a tiny newborn baby grow. It was white, crisp and fresh, embroidered with a few small, delicate teddy bears.
"Are they really that small?" Amy asked, of course she knew baby's were tiny but seeing how small their clothing was felt different. Of course she was excited, completely excited, there was also no denying that the item in Mary's hand was anything but adorable however, the sudden responsibility that dawned upon her, the realisation that very soon she was going to be responsible for someone that small was quite overwhelming.
"Well this one and his sister being twins were so tiny, you wouldn't believe it looking at him now would you but there was once upon a time where he was about this big" she explained, gesturing with her hands Sheldon's tiny newborn stature. "And Georgie, well he was almost 10lbs" Amy eyes watered at the thought. "I guess you could say I've never really had average sized babies" she laughed. "You have nothing to worry about though dear, Sheldon tells me everything is right on track with your little one"
"Yeah, thank goodness"
They eventually reached the cribs at the very bottom of the store. There were so many to choose from, Amy had no idea where to start, they all looked so similar and yet so different. Taking a few steps away from Mary and Sheldon she began to browse, her fingers tracing the wood of various cribs she came into contact with. She tried to imagine standing at the side of one, gazing down at her beautiful little girl as she slept, that thought alone made her want to cry. How beautiful and tender would those moments be, she really couldn't wait.
"Oh this one is beautiful" Amy exclaimed as she walked across to one particular crib that caught her attention. Her fingers danced across the solid, white wood, softly sweeping over the curves of sleigh like style crib. She studied the intricate design and detail on the side panels, it was everything she could have imagined and more. It would be the centrepiece of the nursery, the main attraction if you will. "Sheldon what do you think?" she turned to ask him, not wanting to excluded him from any important decisions.
"It is very pretty" he too noted and appreciated the design and detail, of course he only ever wanted the best for his baby and as he quickly surveyed the ones in the stores, this was definitely it.
"Well if this is the one, it's yours" Mary beamed.
"Have you seen the price?" Amy gasped, despite her immediate love for the crib, she absolutely couldn't let Mary do this. "Maybe we should look for something a little less expensive" Amy looked towards Sheldon, whose eyes were bulging as he too took in the cost.
"Mum we can't ask you to do this"
"You're not asking, I'm offering" she smiled. "Actually, no, I'm telling you"
—
Once they had arrived back at Sheldon's apartment, Amy had taken a nap in Leonard and Penny's room. Since the trip to the baby store, she had let what she had witnessed with all the couples play on her mind. She didn't know why she was letting it affect her so much, why it was all that filled her mind.
The prospect of restarting a relationship with Sheldon had consumed her thoughts for quite a while, she constantly went back and forth on the idea without really ever settling on an outcome. The I love you from last night was something that she couldn't shake off and yet she was somewhat nervous to bring it up, especially if it was something he really couldn't even remember.
When she had eventually retreated from the bedroom, she saw that Mary and Sheldon had ordered pizza. Opting against going out for dinner so that Amy could join them. She felt guilty for haltering their plans but Mary understood better than most the tiredness and exhaustion that came with pregnancy.
She was quiet over dinner, only really managing to nibble a few slices. Mary kept the conversation going, despite her intuitiveness, she seemed completely oblivious to the change in Amy's mood, it was Sheldon of all people that Amy could feel staring at her, sending questioning looks in her direction.
"Is everything okay darling?" Mary asked, when Amy sat back in her chair and placed her hand on her stomach, her face a little scrunched.
"She's just kicked me in the ribs" despite the discomfort, Amy found herself smiling. Even though she was currently causing her pain, it was her little way of letting Amy know everything was okay, she could kick her as much as she wanted. "Come and feel" their day had been so packed that Mary had been yet to feel the baby moving around and kicking.
Mary didn't need to be told twice, she was up straight away at Amy's side, hand placed high up on her bump where Amy was feeling the majority of the kicks. It wasn't long before the kicks could be felt again.
"Oh you're a powerful little thing aren't you" Mary cooed talking to Amy's stomach. "I really can't wait to meet you little darlin'"
—
"Amy, is everything alright?" Sheldon asked, although his voice was quiet, it startled Amy as she crept through the living room that was now engulfed in darkness. The baby was wide awake and her persistent wiggling prevented Amy from sleeping. After tossing and turning for hours, she decided to get up and make herself some tea. "You've been off since we got back from the store"
"It doesn't matter, I'm just being silly" she shook her head, brushing off his questioning in the hope that he would stop. She placed a tea bag in her mug, all the while using the torch on her phone, in an initial attempt not to wake Sheldon who up until a few minutes ago she soon realised was as wide awake as she was.
He sat up and switched the lamp on, just to the left of the sofa. A dim glow illuminated the room and Amy, her furrowed brow told him there was something more, the heaviness in her eyes told him it was more than just the baby keeping her awake. He was impressed that he was able fo figure all of this out himself.
"Well, whether it's silly or not, it's clearly upsetting you" he commented, he had noticed a change in her demeanour throughout the day. Amy bit her lip, she wanted to argue that she wasn't upset but knew that that would probably make her cry. "You're always telling me to talk to you about things, maybe you should talk to me about this" he was clever and when he wanted his own way would often draw upon words Amy had spoken to him.
With a defeated sigh she gave in, he would only keep pushing it if not. "Last night you told me you loved me and as silly as it sounds I really thought you meant it" she gazed down at her tea, watching the tea bag swirl around in the water, she couldn't bring herself to look at him. The words felt strange leaving her lips, she had been carrying that thought around with her all day, never with the intention of voicing it. "I guess, you don't remember" her voice was barely a whisper but already Sheldon could hear the tears catching in her throat.
Sheldon's heart sank, he had a vivid memory of his admission but given that Amy hadn't mentioned anything all day, he wasn't sure whether he had made the whole thing up and without being one hundred percent sure he definitely wasn't going to broach the subject.
"Would it make a difference if I did?" he asked.
"Did what?"
"Meant it. Meant that I love you" it was very rare that he was like this, wearing his heart on his sleeve, laying all the cards out on the table.
"Well do you?" Amy asked, she was pushing him, provoking him for answer and she didn't even know why, her heart was pounding in her chest almost too afraid to hear the answer. She didn't know why, she wasn't even sure anything would change.
"Of course, I do Amy" he sighed, almost as if the statement was obvious. Had she really needed to ask? Could she honestly not see it for herself? "I always have" he shrugged hopelessly. Amy opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out, all that happened was that her heart started to beat faster and tears began to fill her eyes. The mug of tea now abandoned on the kitchen island. "I didn't mean to make you cry" Sheldon was by her side instantly, his hands on her shoulders.
"It's okay, I don't really know why I'm crying" she wiped her eyes. "I think I've just been carrying it around with me all day and I can't sleep and..."
"It's okay" he pulled her into his chest for a cuddle, never normally one to initiate physical contact he simply couldn't stand and watch her cry. "It's okay if you can't say it back. I know that towards the end of the relationship I didn't make you happy" Amy was really glad her face was currently buried into his shirt because right now she was a blubbering mess.
The truth was he had made her happy way back at the beginning of the relationship she was the happiest she had ever been. Maybe they just got a little too comfortable around one another and stopped trying, maybe their relationship suddenly became so normal that it was just mundane, part of the day to day.
"I'm ruining your shirt" she whimpered as she pulled away from him, her face a red, blotchy mess with a few mascaras smudges around her eyes from where she hadn't bothered to remove her make up.
"It's okay" he smiled. "I think you're about the only person I would let ruin my shirt" she could feel herself about to cry again, it was mix of so many things, the emotional conversation that she was currently having, hormones all over the place and lack of sleep had caused her to become a crying mess.
"You did make me happy" she told him, she never wanted him to think that their relationship was just years of unhappiness.
"But you need time. I understand that" Sheldon sensed their was a but, Amy didn't quite know there was a but, yet his understanding meant everything to her. "I just want you to know Amy, that I'm willing to wait" he spoke with confidence as he discussed their relationship, a rarity that Amy was sure she hadn't heard in years. "I don't want to be with anybody else, so I'll wait, whenever you're ready. I'll be right here waiting."
Thank you all so much for reading! As always reviews are so welcome and so appreciated. I absolutely love hearing your thoughts and ideas so please let me know.
Stay safe
Lots of love.